Education, Faculty of
Curriculum and Pedagogy (EDCP), Department of
DSpace
Dyck, Rosie Angeline
This self-study is an exploration of my personal journey through liminal space towards becoming a home economics teacher. I explore how my understanding of curriculum and pedagogy has evolved throughout this process. My research is situated in the interpretivist paradigm, incorporating the methodologies of self-study, narrative inquiry, and a/r/tography. My research puzzle is:  In what ways has my experience of liminal space shaped my understanding of curriculum and pedagogy (in general, and specifically in home economics)? My focus is on the educational significance of liminal space, looking beyond the visible transitions between studenthood (Field, 2012) and professional life. I examine threshold concepts, which “represent a transformed way of understanding, or interpreting, or viewing something without which the learner cannot progress” (Meyer & Land, 2003, p. 1), including what I believe to be threshold concepts of home economics education: everyday life, ecological perspective, interdisciplinarity, and community. Besides helping myself to navigate the idea of home economics in an elementary classroom, my journey through liminal space may help others who are trying to teach home economics in various subject areas, including experienced teachers making mid-career moves to new teaching areas. Since home economics education programs are being cut at the university level, and home economics is not explicitly taught at many schools, there is a need to examine how home economics can be taught throughout the curriculum.
Running head: NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE Navigating liminal space: My journey towards becoming a home economics teacher by Rosie Angeline Dyck B.Ed., University of Alberta, 2001 B.Des., University of Alberta, 1997 A GRADUATING PAPER SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULFILLMENT OF THE REQUIREMENTS FOR THE DEGREE OF Master of Education in THE FACULTY OF GRADUATE STUDIES (Home Economics) The University of British Columbia (Vancouver) © Rosie Angeline Dyck April 9, 2018 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE ii Abstract This self-study is an exploration of my personal journey through liminal space towards becoming a home economics teacher. I explore how my understanding of curriculum and pedagogy has evolved throughout this process. My research is situated in the interpretivist paradigm, incorporating the methodologies of self-study, narrative inquiry, and a/r/tography. My research puzzle is:  In what ways has my experience of liminal space shaped my understanding of curriculum and pedagogy (in general, and specifically in home economics)? My focus is on the educational significance of liminal space, looking beyond the visible transitions between studenthood (Field, 2012) and professional life. I examine threshold concepts, which “represent a transformed way of understanding, or interpreting, or viewing something without which the learner cannot progress” (Meyer & Land, 2003, p. 1), including what I believe to be threshold concepts of home economics education: everyday life, ecological perspective, interdisciplinarity, and community. Besides helping myself to navigate the idea of home economics in an elementary classroom, my journey through liminal space may help others who are trying to teach home economics in various subject areas, including experienced teachers making mid-career moves to new teaching areas. Since home economics education programs are being cut at the university level, and home economics is not explicitly taught at many schools, there is a need to examine how home economics can be taught throughout the curriculum. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE iii Dedication I dedicate this paper to my husband Tim, my rock throughout this journey. Your faith in me remained strong even when mine faltered. I am reminded every day of how lucky I am to share my life with you. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE iv Acknowledgements This paper would not have been possible without the help and support of many important people. First of all, I would like to thank Dr. Mary Gale Smith and Dr. Mary Leah de Zwart, my principal professors in the HEEL program. They are truly experts in their field, who possess not only extensive knowledge of home economics, but a passion for teaching it. I have been blessed to have had such mentors. Next, I’d like to thank Dr. Kerry Renwick. Although we have had limited contact, it was the conversation that we shared at Symposium XIV that helped me narrow my focus for my final paper and helped me realize that my experiences are worthy of study. The members of our HEEL cohort also deserve recognition. Over the last few years, we have developed a solid learning community. While our relationship has been mainly online, the friendships and support have been real. I have been lucky enough to have had Megan Wotherspoon as a face-to-face partner for most of our studies. Our friendship was forged over countless hours working together on various assignments. I also have Megan to thank for encouraging me to apply to HEEL in the first place. I would like to thank my students, who have motivated me to continue working through difficulties, and have offered me encouragement along the way. I deeply appreciate their interest in my work. My family has been a great source of encouragement. I am truly grateful to my sister Irene Lacoursière, who was my key proof-reader, offering not only excellent editorial advice, but also moral support. Finally, I’d like to thank my husband Tim, who has ridden the roller-coaster of graduate studies alongside me. Although it has been tough going at times, he has encouraged and supported me every step of the way. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE v Table of Contents Abstract........................................................................................................................................... ii Dedication ...................................................................................................................................... iii Acknowledgements ....................................................................................................................... iv List of Figures.................................................................................................................................x CHAPTER ONE ........................................................................................................................... 1 INTRODUCTION......................................................................................................................... 1 Journeying Through Liminal Space ............................................................................................ 1 Becoming a Teacher.................................................................................................................... 2 My first teaching job. .............................................................................................................. 3 Teaching art............................................................................................................................. 4 Another new beginning. .......................................................................................................... 5 Beginning to Recognize the Liminal Space ................................................................................ 5 A/r/tography. ........................................................................................................................... 6 Communitas. ........................................................................................................................... 6 Liminal space. ......................................................................................................................... 7 Mimicry................................................................................................................................... 7 Rites of Passage ...................................................................................................................... 7 Stuck places............................................................................................................................. 7 Threshold concepts. ................................................................................................................ 8 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE vi Summary ..................................................................................................................................... 8 CHAPTER TWO .......................................................................................................................... 9 A Methodology of Becoming ........................................................................................................ 9 Interpreting my Lived Experiences............................................................................................. 9 Self-study. ............................................................................................................................. 12 Narrative inquiry. .................................................................................................................. 13 A/r/tography. ......................................................................................................................... 13 Notes from Liminal Space ........................................................................................................ 15 Personal journal..................................................................................................................... 15 Contemplative photography. ................................................................................................. 16 (Re) creating a Picture from the Pieces..................................................................................... 16 Live(d) Experience as Research................................................................................................ 18 CHAPTER THREE .................................................................................................................... 19 A Separation from the Familiar: Entering Liminal Space ..................................................... 19 On Your Mark, Get Set... .......................................................................................................... 19 Liminal Space ........................................................................................................................... 20 Separation from the familiar brings discomfort. ................................................................... 21 Separation Anxiety................................................................................................................ 22 Two Learning Experiences ....................................................................................................... 23 Establishing boundaries. ....................................................................................................... 23 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE vii An inappropriate comment.................................................................................................... 24 Examining the Separation from the Familiar ............................................................................ 26 Layers of Liminality.................................................................................................................. 26 Looking Back While Moving Forward ..................................................................................... 30 It’s Okay Not to Know.............................................................................................................. 33 Challenging yet Complementary Spaces .................................................................................. 36 Making peace with a liminal identity. ................................................................................... 36 A Shift in Perspective. .......................................................................................................... 37 Moving Forward ....................................................................................................................... 37 CHAPTER FOUR ....................................................................................................................... 39 Lingering in the Liminal Space ................................................................................................. 39 Threshold Concepts................................................................................................................... 39 Characteristics of Liminal Space .............................................................................................. 41 Being stuck............................................................................................................................ 42 Community and Communitas ................................................................................................... 45 Experiencing communitas in extra-curricular activities. ...................................................... 47 Learning Theories that May Help Students Move Past Stuck Places ....................................... 49 Zone of proximal development and legitimate peripheral participation. .............................. 49 Transformational teaching. ................................................................................................... 51 Communities of Practice can Help Navigate Liminal Space .................................................... 52 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE viii My own experience of learning by peripheral participation. ................................................ 53 Teaching threshold concepts through peripheral participation in the classroom. ................. 56 Building a supportive classroom community. ...................................................................... 57 Masks and mimicry. .............................................................................................................. 59 CHAPTER FIVE ........................................................................................................................ 63 Passing through Liminal Space ................................................................................................. 63 A New Perspective on Home Economics Education ................................................................ 64 Home Economics: A Brief Overview ....................................................................................... 64 Threshold Concepts for Home Economics Education .............................................................. 65 Everyday life. ........................................................................................................................ 66 Ecological perspective: world as home................................................................................. 68 Interdisciplinarity. ................................................................................................................. 72 Community............................................................................................................................ 75 Emerging Into New Possibilities .............................................................................................. 79 What I have learned about Liminality and Home Economics Education ................................. 81 CHAPTER SIX ........................................................................................................................... 83 Reflecting on my Transformative Liminal Journey ................................................................ 83 My New Understanding of Curriculum and Pedagogy............................................................. 83 Curriculum. ........................................................................................................................... 84 Currere. ................................................................................................................................. 86 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE ix Pedagogy. .............................................................................................................................. 86 A pedagogy of self. ............................................................................................................... 87 Developing a liminal pedagogy. ........................................................................................... 88 Threshold Concepts Lead to Transformation ........................................................................... 89 Embracing Authentic Research................................................................................................. 91 Final Thoughts .......................................................................................................................... 94 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE x List of Figures Figure 1. The Coffee Date............................................................................................................. 11 Figure 2. Blind Contour Drawing. ................................................................................................ 14 Figure 3. Untitled Collage............................................................................................................. 17 Figure 4. The Starting Line of a Marathon. .................................................................................. 20 Figure 5. Trust............................................................................................................................... 28 Figure 6. Self-Portrait as Artist/Researcher/Teacher. ................................................................... 32 Figure 7. Half Missing or Half Remaining?. ................................................................................ 34 Figure 8. A relational view of the features of threshold concepts. ............................................... 41 Figure 9. Riding After a Storm. .................................................................................................... 43 Figure 10. All Geared Up.............................................................................................................. 44 Figure 11. Prayer Intentions.. ........................................................................................................ 47 Figure 12. Zone of Proximal Development. ................................................................................. 50 Figure 13. Legitimate Peripheral Participation. ............................................................................ 50 Figure 14. Original Wedding Cake c. 1967, Fiftieth Anniversary Cake c. 2017 .......................... 55 Figure 15. Pen and Marker Recycling Bin.. .................................................................................. 57 Figure 16. Masks Create Liminal Space. ...................................................................................... 59 Figure 17. Smile! Spontaneous lunch art.. .................................................................................... 60 Figure 18. Thank-you card............................................................................................................ 61 Figure 19. Perfectly Imperfect. ..................................................................................................... 68 Figure 20. Unnecessary packaging ............................................................................................... 71 Figure 21. T-shirt pillows.. ........................................................................................................... 72 Figure 22. Making Aquafaba Mayonnaise. ................................................................................... 73 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE xi Figure 23. The Hippie Skirt. ......................................................................................................... 77 Figure 24. Exit into the Unknown................................................................................................. 80 Figure 25. Carrying Home a Sunflower.. ...................................................................................... 85 Figure 26. Self-Portrait as Art Teacher. ........................................................................................ 87 Figure 27. HEEL Map................................................................................................................... 92 Running head: NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE CHAPTER ONE INTRODUCTION Journeying Through Liminal Space An unexamined life is not worth living – Socrates This paper is an exploration of my learning journey, a journey that has brought me to where I am today as a teacher and as a person. Although being a teacher is my profession, it is also part of my identity, and it is impossible to separate the two. As Palmer (1998/2017) says, “We teach who we are” (p. 2). Who I am is the result of many things, starting from my childhood. My parents and grandparents were important role models for me, leading by example. From them I learned the values of hard work and discipline, as well as the importance of faith, love, and family bonds. I learned valuable lessons from my teachers: lessons that pertained not only to the subject matter, but also to the ways that they taught. I have also been shaped by my unique life experiences, choices I have made, and challenges I have encountered. Through this self-study, I have come to a deeper understanding of how my career and my identity are connected. Becoming a teacher is not a linear process; it is a winding path, often with as many steps backwards as forwards. I’ve become aware that as I have been developing, I have spent much of my time in the space in-between where I am and where I am going. In this paper, I focus on the experiences I have had as I have journeyed through this liminal space between theory and practice, towards becoming a teacher, becoming a teacher of home economics, and becoming a better teacher overall. In this first chapter, I will describe aspects of my learning journey that have led me to where I am today, and define key terms that relate to liminal space. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 2 Becoming a Teacher I had not intended to become a teacher. I wanted to be an artist, even though it was not seen as a practical choice. I had heard the saying those who can, do; those who can’t, teach, and I considered teaching as a last resort. So, I assembled a portfolio and applied to the Bachelor of Fine Arts (BFA) program at the University of Alberta. While I had decided to follow my artistic dream, I also had a practical side, so after a year, I transferred to the Bachelor of Design (B.Des.) program, assuming that having a degree in design would make me more marketable than simply having a BFA. I wasn’t thinking of the deeper implications of a university degree, I just wanted to get a job when I got out. As I was writing this, I noticed that the language I used is very technical-rational (TR) – seeing the world as a machine (Vaines, 1997a, 1997b). I’m talking about being marketable as if I’m a product, rather than someone who has skills to offer. My language shows the assembly-line view of education that I had. I was concerned with finding a job once I got out, as if university was somewhere you enter to get filled with knowledge, and at the end, hopefully you’ll know enough to get a job. This language makes it seem as if there’s a definite end to education, and discounts its ongoing nature. In my paper, I will address these issues, and explain how my views have changed since then. Upon completing my degree, I worked briefly in the field of graphic design, mostly designing websites and promotional materials. I found it stressful having to produce ideas on demand and within a limited time frame. I soon found that the reality of my work did not align with my vision of being an artist. My main source of income at the time came from working as a server at a popular restaurant, where, while I knew I was not working up to my abilities, I enjoyed the social interactions the job provided. This job was liminal, as I knew it was just a stepping-stone to other NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 3 things. Working several jobs allowed me to save up for a three-month trip through Europe. While there, I was inspired by the many different cultures, the beautiful art and architecture, and the other travellers I met along the way. It was amazing to see firsthand the art I had studied, and I often acted as an impromptu tour guide to people I met. It was during this time of “just being” in Europe that I began to have a change of heart about my career path. I loved art, I loved sharing it with others, and I enjoyed the connections I was able to make. Before returning home, I made the decision to return to university to pursue my Bachelor of Education (B.Ed.). When I made the leap into education, it was not elementary school or home economics that I had my heart set on – I wanted to teach art. Since I am fluent in French, I did my education degree in both art and French, again in order to be more employable. The one constant in my life was that I continued working at the same restaurant throughout university, and kept on even when I started substitute teaching. I was not yet ready to settle down, and working multiple jobs allowed me to save for my next travel adventure destination: Australia. My first teaching job. After receiving my B.Ed., I worked as a substitute teacher for six months before travelling to Australia on a working holiday visa. With my visa, I was legally able to work for any employer for up to three months within one year. This trip had been a dream since I was five, when a young Australian man who worked on our farm had told me stories of his home. My first job in Australia was serving in a restaurant, and soon after, I found out about a potential teaching position in the town of Alice Springs, in the heart of the Australian Outback. While it wasn’t the temporary sort of job that I had envisioned, I applied and was quickly hired – many schools in Australia’s Northern Territory struggle to attract teachers. The school division sponsored me so that I was able to work longer than the three months allowed on my visa. I ended up teaching there for one school year – beginning in the second term of 2002 and leaving NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 4 after the first term of 2003. While I was assigned a homeroom, the majority of my teaching was covering a variety of classes – I moved from class to class teaching art, math, English language arts, and drama. The fact that I was a brand-new teacher made it challenging enough, but arriving halfway through the year and taking over for another homeroom teacher added to the challenge, not to mention the cultural barriers I had to overcome. Perhaps because I was so far from home, and life in Australia was still a novelty even after a year, I never really felt like a teacher. I would have stayed on indefinitely but when I heard that my own high school art teacher back home had retired, I applied for the position. When I got the job, I had mixed feelings about leaving Australia and returning to Canada and my hometown. After many years away, what had once been familiar was now foreign, and after having established myself in the Alice Springs community, I would now be starting over again. I reasoned with myself that I could teach back home for a year, and I was assured that there would be work for me again in Alice Springs should I decide to return. Teaching art. Returning to my old high school as a teacher was a surreal experience. Not only was I taking over for a teacher whom I held in high esteem, I was now on equal footing with people who had been my teachers years before. In my new position, I had to establish myself not only within the school, but also within the community. Mrs. D., the teacher I was replacing, had been teaching art for over 30 years, and had taught many of my students’ parents. I felt like everyone was comparing my way of teaching to hers. Gradually, I settled into the position, following some of my predecessor’s ways of doing things but also adding my own stamp to the position. I began to set down roots, and after a while, returning to Australia was no longer an option. Although I was fortunate enough to be teaching within my specialty, I constantly questioned whether I was doing the right thing as a teacher. My classroom was always NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 5 chaotic compared to the academic classes, and I wondered if I should incorporate more theoretical material. I worried about whether students enjoyed learning about art or just liked the less structured environment of the art room. I felt more certain of my artistic ability than I did of my skills as a teacher. Nonetheless, I enjoyed what I did, and had a good rapport with my students. I couldn’t imagine teaching anything else – teaching art had been my goal, after all. Another new beginning. Following an unexpected move, I once again found myself in a new city, this time with my French language skills in demand. My first year in Prince Albert, I taught science and religion in French at the high school level, so although the subject matter was new to me, I was familiar with the age group. After a year, I felt comfortable with the position, and was planning adjustments to my programs when I was informed that I would be teaching Grade 5 the following year. When the Director of Education asked if I had any questions, I replied, “Yes – how do I teach Grade 5?” She laughed, but I was serious. I had no idea where to begin. While teaching art was my comfort zone, and I could relate well to high school students, I felt ill-equipped to teach elementary school. Besides having to teach many unfamiliar curricula, I was unsure of how to relate to these younger students. My first year as a Grade 5 teacher had a steep learning curve. Although I had been teaching for over ten years, I felt like a beginner again. While I worked at establishing relationships with my students, my main concern was to adequately cover the curriculum. Beginning to Recognize the Liminal Space Two years into teaching elementary school, I had the opportunity to begin graduate studies in UBC’s Human Ecology and Everyday Life (HEEL) program. While I did not yet feel completely at ease in my teaching position, I looked forward to the challenges that graduate studies would bring. In a way, I felt that my shift in teaching positions had prepared me for this NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 6 new adventure. Why wait to get settled in before upsetting the balance once again? Feeling slightly unsettled had become my new normal. As it turned out, returning to university, although overwhelming at times, has greatly enhanced my teaching practice. Through my classes, I learned about in-between spaces, and how this concept applied to my own situation. Learning about the liminal space and threshold concepts has given shape to my inquiry. It has helped me make sense of my experiences, and allowed me to see the potential in my current situation. Although being in-between is central to my research, the liminal space I have examined is situated within the discipline of home economics as well as in my previous teaching experiences and the general curriculum of my Grade 5 classroom. In this paper, I examine my experiences in the liminal space in between theory and practice, within the overlapping roles of teacher and student. I examine threshold concepts and how I have experienced transformation in my understanding and practice of being a teacher. The following are some of the key concepts that both guide and help theorize my journey. A/r/tography. “A/r/tography is a research methodology, a creative practice, and a performative pedagogy that lives in the rhizomatic practices of the liminal in-between. These in-between spaces of becoming prompt disruption of duelling binaries, conceptions of identities, and the rush to certainty” (Irwin, 2013, pp.199-200). Communitas. Communitas is “spontaneous community” (Madson Ankeny & Maruggi, 2017, p. 387) that can form within the liminal space. This can be cultivated in the classroom when students see themselves as equals, and fellowship is encouraged (Conroy & de Ruyter, 2009; Madson Ankeny & Maruggi, 2017). NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 7 Liminal space. The word liminal comes from the Latin word limen, meaning threshold. The online Oxford Dictionary provides two definitions of liminal: “1. Relating to a transitional or initial stage of a process. 2. Occupying a position at, or on both sides of, a boundary or threshold” (Oxford Living Dictionaries, 2018). The liminal space, like a threshold, refers to an in-between space. While liminal space can be an actual physical space, like a waiting room or a doorway, it is often seen metaphorically: as a transitional space between ways of knowing, or a space within one’s mind (Cook-Sather & Alter, 2011). Mimicry. Mimicry is a coping strategy used by those within liminal space. It can be used to help guide learners, but becomes problematic when learners don’t move on to actual understanding (Kiley, 2009; Land, Rattray & Vivian, 2014; Meyer & Land, 2005). Although mimicry is sometimes encouraged as a way to practice new concepts, there is the danger of simply “faking it” instead of having a true understanding (Kiley, 2009; Meyer & Land, 2005). Oscillation. Liminal space is non-linear, and those within it can experience periods of oscillation, or being stuck: moving back and forth but not making any progress. Kiley (2009) refers to this as “the ‘two steps forward and one step back’ phenomenon” (p. 295). Rites of Passage. “The rite of passage describes the transition, even a transformation from one state to another” (Kiley, 2009, p. 294). This involves separating from the familiar, entering the liminal space, and emerging into a new state, or reality. Graduation is one rite of passage (Kiley, 2009). Stuck places. These are “places within a curriculum which block the progress of students’ understanding”, also known as “epistemological blockages” (Tanner, 2011, p. 428). NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 8 Threshold concepts. “A threshold concept can be considered akin to a portal, opening up a new and previously inaccessible way of thinking about something. It represents a transformed way of understanding, or interpreting, or viewing something without which the learner cannot progress” (Meyer & Land, 2003, p. 1). These are “important concepts which students find difficult to learn, but which can change the way they use the discipline, and open up new connections for them with other associated concepts” (Wood, 2012, p. 86). Summary In this chapter, I provided an overview of my journey towards becoming a teacher, as well as my ability to recognize liminal space. In the next chapter, I describe the methodology and methods that I used for conducting my research. In Chapter three, I focus on the first part of my journey: leaving the comfort of my familiar existence and entering liminal space. Chapter four introduces the threshold concept framework, and describes the experience of lingering in liminal space, including encountering oscillation and mimicry. In Chapter five, I describe emerging from liminal space, transiting from my dual student/teacher identity back to being a teacher, but with a new outlook on and understanding of curriculum and pedagogy, as well as explore the potential for cross-curricular integration of home economics. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 9 CHAPTER TWO A Methodology of Becoming Without realizing it at the time, I was coming to becoming. (Irwin, 2013, p. 200) In Chapter one, I introduced the concept of liminal space in education, and defined some key terms relating to liminal space and threshold concepts. I explained how I would use the concepts of liminal space and being in-between to explore the experiences of simultaneously being a teacher and a student, being an experienced teacher in a completely new situation, and navigating outsider/insider identities. The purpose of this study is to explore this lived experience. In this chapter I describe my research methodology and my methods for gathering evidence of and documenting my transformation. Interpreting my Lived Experiences I situate my research in the interpretivist paradigm, since I am both subject and researcher. I have analyzed my collected information from a subjective point of view and I seek to understand experience rather than prove a hypothesis (Hultgren, 1989; Wahyuni, 2012). The interpretivist paradigm is also known as constructivism, since knowledge is constructed by those who are experiencing a given situation (Sipe & Constable, 1996; Wahyuni, 2012). Interpretive research does not seek to provide definitive answers, but to explore the meanings we ascribe to experiences (Laverty, 2003; Leggo, 2004). According to Laverty (2003), “understanding is always more than merely re-creating someone else’s meaning” (p. 25). Since my research questions are personal in nature and based on my own lived experience, I chose interpretive/hermeneutic phenomenology as a philosophical base from which to examine my experiences. According to Hultgren (1989), “phenomenology attends to the world NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 10 as we experience it in everyday life” (p. 50) and I will be examining my experiences as a teacher and student. It is important not to simply describe, but to interpret my lived experiences (van Manen, 1990). I have tried to interpret experiences through artistic expression. Figure 1 is a page from my sketchbook that illustrates my interpretation, rather than description, of a lived experience. The difference between phenomenology and interpretive/hermeneutic phenomenology is that while phenomenology focuses on knowing, hermeneutic phenomenology is more concerned with dasein, or being-in-the-world (Conroy, 2003; Laverty, 2003). The interpretive aspect is key to this self study, since interpretation refers to how we come to understand experience (Hultgren, 1989). Narrative plays an important role in interpretive phenomenology, and can be used to describe one’s experience in the world (Conroy, 2003; Groenewald, 2004). According to Clandinin, Pushor and Murray Orr (2007), “humans, individually and socially, lead storied lives” (p. 22), and these stories help us make sense of the world around us. The narrative, the story of our experience, becomes the phenomenon being studied (Clandinin, Pushor, & Murray Orr, 2007). I used complementary qualitative methodologies in my interpretive study: self-study; narrative inquiry; and a/r/tography. When I first began planning my final paper, I struggled with the idea of doing interpretive research. From my research methods class, I had learned that interpretive research was a valid and useful method, but I still had some doubts. In my mind, research involved something outside of myself. It meant I should follow the scientific method: identify my question; create a hypothesis; and then work to test it. I should collect and analyze data in an impersonal way. But how could I claim to be a researcher if I was studying myself? I wasn’t sure how I could justify it. When studying the various research paradigms, qualitative research appealed to me, but I thought it might be taking the easy NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 11 Figure 1. The Coffee Date. Collage and mixed media. Personal work. New insights can be gained from exploring situations in a creative way. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 12 road. I have since found that this is not the case – interpretive work requires a lot of soul-searching. By resisting interpretive research, I was resisting my own instincts, and maybe trying to be someone else. Doing this research has helped me understand how it is important to be true to myself. The insights that I have uncovered as I’ve gone back and unpacked my experiences have given me a new perspective from which to approach my teaching practice. Self-study. Self-study is a form of teacher research that allows us to examine our teaching practice by examining who we are as teachers. Samaras, Hicks, and Garvey Berger (2004) provide three categories that self-study is used for: “1. Self-knowing and forming – and reforming a professional identity; 2. modeling and testing effective reflection; and, 3. pushing the boundaries of teaching” (p. 907). While similar to action research, self-study is more personal in nature. The aim of both is to improve teaching practice, but according to Austin and Senese (2004), “action research is more about what a teacher does and not about who a teacher is” (p. 1235). Self-study can be empowering for teachers, since it puts us in the position of researcher. It also puts us in the role of learner, which can help us relate to our students on a different level (Austin & Senese, 2004). According to Bullough and Pinnegar, (2001), “self-study points to a simple truth, that to study a practice is simultaneously to study self: a study of self-in-relation to other” (p. 14). As a teacher, I am constantly relating to my students, so having a better understanding of myself helps my interactions with them. Self-study involves reflection and self-questioning in order to examine personal values that guide our teaching practice. This personal examination can also help reveal instances of cognitive dissonance within our practice (Austin & Senese, 2004), helping us see what action is required to become more authentic educators. Ultimately, the goal NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 13 of self-study is to improve one’s practice (Bullough & Pinnegar, 2001; Hamilton, Smith & Worthington, 2008; Samaras, Hicks, & Garvey Berger, 2004), and I believe that by studying my lived experiences, it is possible to become a stronger, more focused teacher. Narrative inquiry. I have chosen narrative inquiry to complement my self-study, since examining lived experiences is central to this methodology. There is a similarity between narrative inquiry and self-study; both involve stories, and both involve interpretation of these stories to make meaning, which can then be used to inform practice (Clandinin, 2006; Clandinin, Pushor & Murray Orr, 2007; Hamilton, Smith & Worthington, 2008; Leggo, 2004; Samaras & Freese, 2009). Narrative inquiry involves tension between our experiences and the stories we tell about them (Clandinin, 2006; Ellett, 2011). Similarly, Aoki (2004b) describes his interpretation of the concept of intentionality – while some would see tension as being uncomfortable and something to be avoided, without tension, growth is not possible. According to Clandinin, Pushor and Murray Orr (2007), narrative inquiry is not simply an easy form of research; it involves “much more than the telling of stories” (p. 21) since the stories are used as rich data sources from which to gain deeper understanding of not only the subject, but oneself (although in my case, I am the subject). A/r/tography. A/r/tography appeals to me for various reasons. First of all, I am very comfortable with visual language, and I often use images, either photos or drawings, to help me connect to and make sense of my experiences. A/r/tography, with its forward slashes, embodies the idea of liminal space, and dwelling within it (Sameshima & Irwin, 2008). The a/r/t of a/r/tography encompasses the roles of artist/researcher/teacher, which exist in the spaces between these complementary identities. A/r/tography exists between theory and practice (Irwin, 2006, 2008, 2013, Sameshima & Irwin, 2008). A/r/tography’s emphasis on becoming fits well with my NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 14 exploration of liminal space, my journey of becoming a teacher of home economics. It is a methodology of discovery, where the journey is as important as, if not more important than the final destination. Figure 2 is a visual example of a slowed-down journey of discovery. Blind contour drawing is a technique used to improve perception. The entire drawing is to be done without looking at the paper, but instead staying focused on the subject. If done correctly, the artist enters into a liminal state during the drawing process, losing track of everything except for their subject and the slow advance of their pencil on paper. While the end result of such drawing is not always aesthetically pleasing, it is a very effective learning tool that eventually leads to improved drawing. Blind contour drawings are not usually displayed, but I sometimes got my students to use them to explore colour theory, transforming them into stand-alone works of art. This gave my students visual evidence of their learning process, and encouraged them to continue exploring possibilities. Figure 2. Blind Contour Drawing. Mixed media drawing. Student work. The process of creating this piece was more important than the final product. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 15 Irwin (2013) describes a shift from “desiring to ‘be’ a teacher as expert to ‘becoming’ a teacher as inquirer” (p. 203). Embracing the attitude of inquiry opens up new spaces in which to exist. To see myself as already being something cuts off possibilities of growth. By embracing the notion of becoming, I am staying open to the possibilities that may arise. “There can be no being a/r/tography without the processes of becoming a/r/tography” (Irwin 2013, p. 200). A/r/tography, like blind contour drawing, encourages the practitioner to slow down and engage in the process of discovery rather than focusing on a fixed endpoint (Irwin, 2008). Both require concentration and engagement with the subject, entering into the liminal space of becoming (Irwin, 2013), and ultimately leading to a deeper understanding of the subject. Describing an event during which she gave herself over to the processes of walking and contemplation, Irwin states, “had I run this path, or even walked swiftly, I would have arrived at my destination more quickly and fulfilled the curriculum I predetermined” (de Cosson, Irwin, Kind, & Springgay, 2007, p. 143). While arriving quickly may seem like a good idea, the act of lingering in the liminal space allows for more possibilities than following rigidly set plans. Notes from Liminal Space Personal journal. Keeping a personal journal was a major part of my data collection. Since I was conducting a self-study, I did not interview other people, and so my journal took the place of interviews. It provided me the opportunity to turn inward and reflect on my experiences. Although I was not interviewing others, my reflections were often based on shared experiences with others (mainly my students), but from my perspective. Classroom occurrences feature prominently in my reflections, with not only descriptions of events, but also my reaction to them, as well as new pedagogic possibilities that may arise. Rather than simply describing an event, I might question what had occurred, taking note of successes and failures, and potential for future NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 16 change. My reflections often turned into possibilities, as ideas took shape. It was during the reviewing of my notes that I was able to read meaning into my experiences. This is part of the process of narrative inquiry: first the story is lived, then told, then relived and retold (Clandinin, Pushor, & Murray Orr, 2007; Johnson & Christensen, 2014). Narrative inquiry involves the researcher coming alongside the subject through the sharing of narratives (Clandinin, Pushor, & Murray Orr, 2007; Johnson & Christensen, 2014). Contemplative photography. Miksang photography is another data collection method I used. Miksang photography, or contemplative photography, has its roots in Buddhism. Trungpa Riponche, a Tibetan lama, used contemplative photography to “express the experience of the awakened state of mind” (Karr & Wood, 2011, p. 194). Miksang photography is a visual process, which allows the practitioner to see their surroundings (or experiences) from a new perspective (Neilsen, 2007). There are times when a photograph captures what we may not immediately see, or offers us a new way of seeing: perception (pure seeing) vs. conception (what we think about what we see) (Karr & Wood, 2011). There are three stages involved in Miksang photography: a) the flash of perception, b) visual discernment, and c) capturing what we see (Karr & Wood, 2011; Neilsen, 2007). While it is not conducive to narrative, Miksang photography is a visual study of phenomena; it is a way of documenting how we experience the world (Neilsen, 2007). (Re) creating a Picture from the Pieces Once I had collected my data, I had to piece it together in a coherent way. This process reminded me of creating a collage, such as the one in Figure 3, which I made at the beginning of the school year, to decorate a binder. The eclectic nature of collage is reminiscent of bricolage research, a qualitative research method that allows for flexibility in its approach, assembling information and studying phenomena from a variety of angles (Rogers, 2012). NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 17 For me, collage itself is a voyage of discovery. I enjoy the possibilities for surrealism that this art form offers. It’s exciting to collect random images and to experiment with creative juxtapositions – bringing to light connections that were previously unseen. While there is an aspect of chance, depending on the images I have to work with, it takes imagination and vision to get the pieces to work together. In this collage, I incorporated several active elements, creating a sense of movement and excitement. The text that is revealed in the background is representative of academic knowledge, while the hand that emerges represents the hands-on aspect of practice. In order to make sense of my collected data, I read through my reflection journal, looking for connections to make between what and how I was teaching, as well as evidence of improved Figure 3. Untitled Collage. Personal work. The beauty of collage lies in the juxtaposition of unrelated images that come together to form a cohesive whole. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 18 practice. I also looked for evidence of student engagement, understanding, and connections between subject matter and everyday life. I tracked changes in both what and how I was teaching since beginning to teach from an ecological perspective. I analyzed my personal reflections to look for trends and any important moments of discovery. I used Hole and McEntee’s (1999) guided reflection protocol and Newman’s (n.d.) framework for analyzing critical incidents to help me analyze critical incidents, both from my previous and current practice. Both Hole and McEntee, and Newman’s questions helped me to view incidents objectively, then make meaning of the situation, asking questions such as “why did this happen?” and “what does this mean for my practice?”. I also used my photographs as inspiration for reflection. Live(d) Experience as Research As I examined the road that has brought me to where I am today as an educator, I realized that I have been in a near-constant state of movement and becoming, experiencing significant changes along the way, in both my personal and professional life. I recently experienced the dual aspects of being a student and a teacher, and of entering into a new curricular area. In the spirit of narrative/self-study/a/r/tographic inquiry, I came up with a research puzzle rather than a research question:  In what ways has my experience of liminal space shaped my understanding of curriculum and pedagogy (in general, and specifically in home economics)? After describing my research methodology and the methods I used to collect and analyze my data in this chapter, my exploration begins in Chapter three where I leave the familiar and enter into liminal space. This exploration continues in Chapter four where I linger in liminal space, and concludes in Chapter five when I pass through liminal space. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 19 CHAPTER THREE A Separation from the Familiar: Entering Liminal Space If we change the stories we live by, quite possibly we change our lives. - Thomas King In Chapter two, I described my research methodologies as well as the methods that I used for collecting and interpreting my data. In this chapter, I explain the concept of liminal space and how lessons that I have learned from within this space have allowed me to see my teaching practice in a new light. According to Turner (1979, in Kiley, 2009), “states are relatively fixed or stable conditions” (p. 294) and in order to move from one state to the next, one undergoes a rite of passage (Czarniawska & Mazza, 2003; Field, 2012; Kiley, 2009; Pierce, 2007; Wood, 2012). While rites of passage can be found in all aspects of daily life, I have focused on the transitions I have undergone during my educational journey – including both entering a new teaching position and beginning graduate studies. There are three stages that define a rite of passage. First, one experiences separation from their familiar existence. Next, they find themselves in liminal space – a space that is in-between where they came from and where they are heading. Finally, after passing through the liminal space, they find themselves in a new state (Kiley, 2009). In this chapter, I examine the first part of my liminal journey. I describe my experiences as I separated from my familiar existence and entered into uncharted territory. On Your Mark, Get Set... Beginning a race is an example of, quite literally, entering liminal space (see Figure 4). Runners gather around the starting point, nerves tingling, waiting for the starter’s pistol. While this waiting period is not necessarily comfortable, it at least presents little risk to NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 20 the participants. With the starting signal, runners leave the corral, entering into the liminal space of the race where for the duration, they are in-between the start and end points, and where variables such as weather, course difficulty and amount of training can impact their performance. Even for a well-prepared runner, a race presents a series of challenges. They know that the race will be long, hard and uncomfortable, but once they’ve started, most racers will push through to the finish line. Although they may all complete the same course, everybody’s race story will be different. While racers may have a time goal in mind, races can end in triumph or heartbreak. The one result that everyone hopes to avoid is the DNF, or Did Not Finish, which is like being stuck in liminal space forever, without crossing the final threshold. Liminal Space Anthropologists examining specific cultural rites of passage, such as the transition from adolescence to adulthood, originally studied the concept of liminality. This initial view of liminality was a linear one, moving clearly from one life-stage to another (Cook-Sather & Alter, 2011; Field, 2012; Kiley, 2009; Land, Rattray & Vivian, 2014; Meyer & Land, 2005). More Figure 4. The Starting Line of a Marathon. Digital photograph by Tim Dyck. Beginning a race is akin to entering liminal space. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 21 recently, the concept of liminality in education has been explored (Baillie, Bowden & Meyer, 2013; Conroy & de Ruyter, 2009); Cook-Sather, 2006; Cook-Sather & Alter, 2011; Costley, Elliott & Gibbs, 2010; Field, 2012; Garvey Berger, 2004; Kiley, 2009; Land, Rattray & Vivian, 2014; Madson Ankeny & Maruggi, 2017; Meyer & Land, 2003, 2005; Pierce, 2007; Sameshima & Irwin, 2008; Sinner, 2010; Tanner, 2011; Wood, 2012). This idea of liminality within education is that it is not linear nor is it dependent on a specific stage of life. Rather it can be described as “rhizomean” (Aoki, 2004b; Baillie, Bowden & Meyer, 2013; Irwin, 2013) in reference to both its non-linear structure and its potential for new growth. My focus is on the educational significance of liminal space, looking beyond the visible transitions between studenthood (Field, 2012) and professional life. When I joined the HEEL program, I entered a situation where I occupied two spaces at once, as both a student and as a teacher. On the one hand, I was part of a community of teachers, in charge of students; on the other hand, I was a student myself, and in this way, aligning myself with those I taught. According to Field (2012), “Studenthood is not merely a transitional process, but can also be understood as a transitional identity” (p. 10). My students are also in liminal space, as each year they separate from their familiar grade and teacher, to enter a new stage. They will keep their transitional student identity for many years to come. It is important for me to recognize that I am not alone in my experience of liminal space. My understanding of this space can help me empathize with my students. Separation from the familiar brings discomfort. When I began my graduate studies, I did not have a word for the space in which I found myself – the liminal, or in-between space. What I did know was that I questioned whether I belonged in the master’s program, in home economics, or even in teaching. While I had been teaching for many years, my understanding of NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 22 what made up good teaching was being challenged at every turn. This was not a comfortable place to be in, but according to Garvey Berger (2004), “comfort is rarely transformative” (p. 346). She writes about helping students make meaning of their experiences as they exist on the edge of understanding, or in “the liminal zones between our knowing and not knowing” (p. 338). I can see now that the separation I experienced between my old and new existences was the beginning of my transformation. Entering into the liminal space requires a leap of faith, since it entails giving up the familiar (Garvey Berger, 2004; Meyer & Land, 2005). For me, changing teaching positions was out of my hands, while beginning graduate studies was my own choice. No matter how we enter into the liminal space, it can be disorienting. Once liminal space is entered, “there can be no ultimate full return to the pre-liminal state” (Meyer & Land, 2005, p. 376). Separation anxiety. As I examine interactions between myself and my students, and explore the pre- and post-liminal versions of myself, I realize that the key to understanding how I relate to others is also about understanding how I relate to myself. My internal dialogue shapes my interactions with others. As I entered the liminal space of a new teaching position, I knew that I had separated from my previous existence, but there were still times when I unexpectedly found myself in the midst of an unfamiliar – and uncomfortable – situation. In my first year of teaching elementary school, I had some eye-opening experiences that caused me not only to reconsider my interactions with my elementary-aged students, but led me to question my previous pedagogical practices. These experiences led to new insights about my role as an educator. In the following section I will describe and analyze two incidents that led to changes in my approach to teaching. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 23 Two Learning Experiences Establishing boundaries. The band program at our school is optional, so my students who opt out have arts education with me during those class periods. I usually have just a small group of students during this time, and the format is more laid-back than that of a regular class. As a result, students have more freedom than usual. One day as we were preparing for a drama game, one of my more energetic students was bouncing around, and when we had formed a circle, without warning, she launched herself at me, just being silly. Without thinking, I reached down and picked her up, dangling her upside down by the ankles. It had been an instinctual movement – my niece was that same age as these students, and this was how we would play together. The moment I had picked her up, however, I realized that I shouldn’t be doing this. Right away, I set her down, worried about the repercussions. The students were all shrieking with laughter, including the student I had picked up, and they all clamored to be next. It took me a while to get them settled, and to explain it would not happen again. This situation brought into sharp focus for me that I was no longer in my habitual environment. Such an incident would never have occurred in my high school classroom, and I had been completely caught off guard. Before teaching elementary school, my experience with students this age was limited to my niece and to the children of friends. At social gatherings, I had often found myself in the midst of the children, while their parents enjoyed some time apart. I would sometimes spin them around, give piggy-back rides, or as I had done in class, lift them upside-down. As the teacher of an elementary class, I needed to establish a different sort of relationship, and maintain boundaries. Some parents would not appreciate such handling of their children by their teacher, and my professionalism could have been called into question. While my students were greatly amused by this incident, it made me realize the vulnerable position that NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 24 they are in. Of course, I would never deliberately hurt them, but lifting a student in this way poses a potential danger. I am constantly asking my students to respect my personal space, since they approach me from all sides, and often press up against me. I try to lead by example, so it would not be right for me to overstep my bounds and invade their space. I need to be their advocate and protector. While teaching is about establishing relationships, these relationships must be clearly delineated: I am their teacher and not their friend. While we are at school, I have to act in a professional manner that is appropriate for the situation. My size and strength gives me a physical advantage over my students, and I should not take advantage of that power, even if I mean no harm. An inappropriate comment. One day, when one of my Grade 5 students pointed out a fact that was clearly evident, I responded with, “Thank you, Captain Obvious!” While the rest of the class found this quite amusing, the student in question turned bright red and clammed up. As I proceeded with the lesson, I noticed that most of the students were still snickering and whispering about my comment, much to the chagrin of their embarrassed classmate. One student even drew a “superhero” with a giant O on his chest, which got circulated at recess. I was shocked that my seemingly innocuous comment would have caused such a commotion. I pulled the offended student aside and apologized to him, then made a public apology in front of the class. I explained that even teachers sometimes make bad decisions, and that it was not fair for one student to pay the price for something unkind that I had said. This led to a discussion of how words can be hurtful to people, and how it is important to own up to our mistakes. The students responded well to my apology, and the teasing stopped. In high school, banter between my students and I had been the norm, and it was not uncommon to use sarcasm in our dialogue. The reaction that my younger students had to my NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 25 sarcastic remark really gave me pause. At what point do the rules change? Looking back at this incident has allowed me to see it more clearly. In fifth grade, students really look up to their teachers. I am in a position of trust, and I encourage my students to come to me if they have a problem. My comment shifted the dynamics: how could a student come to me for safety if I was the one who instigated the problem? I had unwittingly put my student into an unsafe position, assuming that my teasing was harmless, and that the students could handle it – it was meant to be funny. We do extensive bullying prevention education at our school, and now it was possible that I was perceived as a bully. I considered alternate versions of this story. What if my student had laughed it off, but was still deeply hurt by my comment? How would that affect his sense of self, and his feelings towards school? This made me think of my high school students. They were able to laugh off the teasing in class, but it is possible that they were hiding hurt feelings. With the younger students, if I had not intervened, the one comment could have started a chain reaction, resulting in a deterioration of trust and enjoyment of school. I teach about kindness, but my words in this situation did not match my message. Students tend to mimic their teacher, so by showing kindness I have the potential to create a more caring environment. Moving forward, I see that this situation has implications for my teaching practice. Maybe the student who made the obvious comment was simply trying to make sense of what he was learning. I now try to show more understanding in situations like this, so students are encouraged to continue participating in class. A few careless words caused a rift that took work to mend – I needed to reestablish a relationship of trust not only with the targeted student, but also with all class members. Since then, I have become more aware of how I speak in class. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 26 Examining the Separation from the Familiar These two incidents from my first year of teaching elementary school brought me face to face with the reality of teaching in an elementary classroom, where my habitual way of being was no longer acceptable. I was outside my high school comfort zone, and I needed to adapt to this unfamiliar culture. These incidents clearly illustrate the separation I was experiencing between my previous and my new positions. In both of these cases, I realized that my automatic responses did not fit in my new situation, and that I would have to adjust my usual way of thinking. Reflecting on these incidents has also shown me that my previous habits were not necessarily as innocent as I had once believed them to be. Going through the difficult separation period has given me greater insights into becoming a better teacher, no matter who my students are. I think that this separation has caused a shift in my awareness, helping me become more mindful of my words and actions in class. These incidents also signal the start of a new identity formation (Cook-Sather, 2006; Field, 2012; Wood, 2012) as I began to see myself as an elementary school teacher. Layers of Liminality When I was thrust into a teaching assignment far out of my comfort zone, my shortcomings as a teacher seemed especially apparent. Now here I was, studying home economics education at the graduate level, with no formal home economics education myself. Most of the other cohort members seemed to be home economics teachers, and I wondered if there was a point in pursuing this subject if I would be teaching elementary school for the foreseeable future. Eventually, as I continued my studies, I began to see that there was the NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 27 potential to incorporate home economics across the curriculum, but at the time, I was questioning whether I belonged in the program, whether I had bitten off more than I could chew. Beginning HEEL involved entering into a state of liminality, but I was already in a liminal position when I began my studies. At that time, I was still finding my way as an elementary school teacher, so beginning my studies added another layer of liminality to my experience. While it’s nice to think that we can simply move in a straightforward manner from one state to the next, the state of liminality is non-linear; events do not always occur in a straight line, and can overlap each other (Aoki, 2004b; Baillie, Bowden & Meyer, 2013; Cook-Sather, 2006; Land, Rattray, & Vivian, 2014; Sameshima & Irwin, 2008; Wood, 2012). While the traditional view of liminality and rites of passage involved a separate space in which to exist, or dealing with one transition at a time (Cook-Sather & Alter, 2011; Field, 2012; Kiley, 2009; Land, Rattray & Vivian, 2014; Meyer & Land, 2005; Wood, 2012), Kiley (2009) suggests that currently, in the context of academics, those entering liminal space “operate simultaneously across a number of contexts and within different communities and with different authorities” (p. 295). I could definitely relate to this: teaching and being a student both come with their own sets of challenges, and neither can be put on hold. Because of these overlapping roles, as I have experienced, it is possible to be a beginner and an expert at the same time (Cook-Sather, 2006; Kiley, 2009). When I began teaching elementary school, I had ten years’ teaching experience, yet I could relate to Pierce’s (2007) expression “professional puberty” (p. 43) since I was in an awkward in-between state. While I was an experienced teacher, entering into a completely unfamiliar area returned me to the state of a beginner. As well, becoming a student at the same time reinforced for me how much I had to learn. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 28 It seems scarier than it is. While on a holiday to Belize, my husband and I often walked along a narrow trail through dense foliage to get to one of our favourite restaurants. During the day, there was nothing to it, but at night it was dark and intimidating. Since the path was so narrow, Tim would take the lead, and I would follow his shadowy figure as we made our way towards the distant lights. One night I made a painting of this experience (see Figure 5). I wanted to give a sense of how I felt walking in the dark, unable to see much but having faith that I would reach my destination. Although this path continued to be somewhat unsettling, I knew that by following my husband, I would make it through. It was this trust that allowed me to relax and focus on the details around me – to actually notice the textures of the plants, and Tim’s shadow on the ground. The fact that there was a shadow indicates that we were not completely in the dark. Figure 5. Trust. Watercolour and ink. There can be more than one way to interpret an image or a situation. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 29 While I had meant to show an aspect of safety, I see now that this painting juxtaposes the conflicting ideas of safety and danger. Depending on the viewer, either interpretation is valid. I know that the figure in the painting was guiding me, but without this knowledge, the figure can be seen as a threat. Rather than being a guide, it could be seen as someone who is lurking in the shadows, blocking my way. If I had been walking down the path alone and I saw this figure approaching me, I would have most likely turned around and gone back, not wanting to put myself in danger. Making the leap into liminal space can be frightening. You leave behind what was familiar and enter into the unknown. While I don’t usually take big risks without considering the consequences, taking too much time to contemplate all aspects of the unknown can make it seem even more frightening than it is. Once we take the initial step, the unknown seems more manageable because we are now in it. I see an example of this at the beginning of every school year. Even if my class is all set up and everything is ready, I have a sense of anxiety until I meet my students for the first time. Once I have actual students to match with the names in my book, I feel more settled and better able to proceed. Meeting the students who have previously just existed on paper brings with it a degree of familiarity, even if there is still a lot left to learn about them. Liminal space can be full of uncertainty and conflicting feelings. On one hand, it offers safety, since you may not be held to the same standards as someone who has passed through to the next level. The danger is that you may never emerge from the liminal space, but remain on the periphery, unable to partake of full-fledged belonging. Within the liminal space, true understanding can be elusive, but it is important to stay on the path throughout the twists and turns, in order to emerge transformed. The implication this has for my teaching practice is to NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 30 remember that my students will have ways of interpreting situations that may differ from my own. What I might see as routine, like speaking in front of the class, can be terrifying for some. As their guide, I need to help my students find ways to navigate through the darkness and uncertainty of learning. Looking Back While Moving Forward I believe that because of my lack of choice, it was harder for me to reconcile with my new teaching position than with my new student status. At times I felt like a student in my teaching position, since there was so much that was unfamiliar. I experienced tension trying to move ahead and become a better elementary school teacher, while wishing I could go back to the comfort I once had. Some of my current discomfort, I realized, came from the fact that I was romanticizing my previous teaching position. While teaching art was my area of expertise, even then I had often struggled with my teacher identity. As I began to learn about Vaines’ (1997a, 1997b) modes of practice, including reflective practice, I was able to recognize the cognitive dissonance that I had experienced within my previous teaching position. Cognitive dissonance occurs when our beliefs do not align with our behaviors or experiences (Brickson, 2013). I believed I was an intelligent person, but as an art teacher, I often heard disparaging remarks about my subject area and even my own identity. “Any idiot can hold a pencil” was one justification I heard for overcrowding my classes, insinuating that even if students couldn’t succeed in other classes, they would do well in art. I learned from my HEEL colleagues that home economics teachers face similar challenges, with the assumption that anyone can cook. This attitude undermines all the effort that we put into building our programs. A professional development presenter once told our assembled school division that art teachers have low IQs, compared with math and science teachers. Because of NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 31 such comments and perceptions by others, I felt that I needed to prove my worth. I tried to make my subject area more academic, believing that it (and I) would not be taken seriously if it were seen as being too much fun. I subjected my students to art history lectures and tedious written assignments, trying to constrain my creative subject within “acceptable” parameters. Eventually I realized that this approach was not working, but I saw it more as a failure on my part than on being an inauthentic way of teaching my subject. I devalued what I did well, such as building relationships with students and engaging them in the subject matter, because I felt it lacked academic status. Learning about a/r/tography has helped me to see my creative side as a source of strength. In a graduate class I took as part of the HEEL program, I was excited to have the opportunity to create a visual representation rather than a paper. I no longer felt I needed to be either artistic or academic: the two could coexist. In the portrait that I created for the class (Figure 6), I experienced the power of combining research with creative practice (Irwin, 2013). While I enjoyed the process of drawing, it was a challenge to come up with the imagery that would adequately communicate my message. I wanted to include symbols that I related to myself in the combined roles of artist, researcher, and teacher. My drawing is open to interpretation, and some elements remain ambiguous, even to me. The blank canvas, for example, represents possibility, but the rainbow could either be coming from the canvas to my hand, representing inspiration, or travelling from my hand to the canvas, showing my potential for creativity. I am standing in front of a curtain, as if on a stage, but which side of the curtain I am on is unclear. I did my best to translate artist/researcher/teacher to Latin, to symbolize gravitas, yet I showed myself wearing a skirt that represents my creative side. I am NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 32 looking directly out of the picture, showing that I am sure of who I am – I don’t need to try to be someone else. Figure 6. Self-Portrait as Artist/Researcher/Teacher. Coloured pencil on paper. It was no longer necessary to be either/or. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 33 It’s Okay Not to Know During a guided writing activity, my grade five class was writing a paragraph together. After coming up with several suggestions for topic sentences, my students voted for their favorite one: “Many kids don’t know that there’s a lot of fun you can have at school.” Ted (a pseudonym) became visibly upset by this choice, and I thought it was because his suggestion had not been chosen. Once he had calmed down, he explained that he found this sentence insulting, since it implied that kids are not smart, because of the phrase “kids don’t know”. I tried to explain that it’s okay not to know something. I wrote “I don’t know” on the board, and asked students to give examples of when it’s okay to say this. I shared with them my own experiences of not know ing how to teach grade five when I started. While most students appeared to enjoy the discussion, Ted sat with his arms crossed and an angry expression on his face. His only contribution to the conversation was to say that I was lucky to at least get to teach Grade 5 instead of Grade 1, so my knowledge wouldn’t be wasted on students too young to appreciate it. While entering into liminal space offers many new possibilities, it can also pose a threat to our sense of security. Garvey Berger (2004) speaks of the catastrophic disorganization that transformation can cause. For some students, like Ted, this disorganization is to be avoided at all costs. Ted sees not knowing as a bad thing. If we see learning in terms of black and white, we only see knowing or not-knowing, not the potential for growth that exists between the two. I tried to frame the state of not-knowing as positive, and let my students know that even I still have a lot to learn. This may or may not be comforting to them, especially if they believe a teacher should be universally knowledgeable (Austin & Senese, 2004). Like the optimist and the pessimist, one might see what is there, while the other focuses on what is missing (see Figure 7). It is these NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 34 black and white thinkers who can tend to get stuck in their learning. While becoming stuck is not an uncommon occurrence for learners, some are able to move past their difficulties much more easily than others. Teaching my students strategies that focus more on the process of learning than on a definitive outcome may help them move through their stuck places with less difficulty. Moving through liminal space, “how we know can be more important than what we know” (Baillie, Bowden & Meyer, 2013). Knowing that they are not alone, but part of a community of learners can also encourage students to be more open about their learning difficulties. Ted’s comments about how my knowledge would have been wasted on Grade 1 students gave me pause. I had had a similar thought in relation to teaching Grade 5. My teaching identity had previously revolved around the subject I taught – which I was good at. I felt like I had been demoted when I was moved to elementary school, but have since come to see that it has helped me become a more effective teacher. Because I could no longer rely on what I knew for certain, I have had to focus on developing my practice. Figure 7. Half Missing or Half Remaining? Personal photograph. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 35 I was still grappling with matters of identity when I began HEEL. As a teacher, I would encourage my students to persist despite learning difficulties, and tell them that it is okay to admit when they do not understand something. This was another area of cognitive dissonance for me. I find it uncomfortable to admit that I don’t know something. Rather than ask for assistance, I am more likely to try and figure things out on my own. Entering the space of being a student while being a teacher put me into an interesting position – how could I tell my students that it was okay not to know when I couldn’t (or wouldn’t) admit it myself? Beginning HEEL showed me that I had a lot to learn, and that refusing to admit a lack of understanding would not benefit me. While I found it easy to be compassionate towards my students, it was harder for me to be as understanding with myself. According to Neff and Seppala (2016), cultivating self-compassion is important for teachers. Encouraging my students to ask for help while berating myself for not knowing something implies that I have higher expectations for myself than I do for them. Besides limiting my own growth, this mindset discourages authentic relationships from developing (Neff & Seppala, 2016). As I experienced a return to studenthood (Field, 2012), I came to fully realize the importance of this message. Refusing to admit that I didn’t understand would not only hold me back, but would create a separation between myself and others (Neff & Seppala, 2016). When my actions don’t match my words, I am not teaching authentically. I’ve had to relearn how to be a teacher – it’s not about always knowing the answers, but being willing to seek them out. I have often been told not to let on to students if I don’t know something, so that I can maintain the upper hand in class. Instead, I now try to use these cases as learning opportunities to demonstrate to students that learning is ongoing. If they can see that I am still learning, it might give them the encouragement to persevere through difficulties. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 36 Challenging yet Complementary Spaces While occupying the spaces of elementary teacher and student both at once was challenging, I have come to realize that each of these new positions complemented the other. If I had not been teaching while doing graduate studies, I would have been learning (theorizing) with no practice. Life would have been simpler, with an undivided focus on my learning. There would have been no worry about writing papers at the same time as writing report cards. It would, however, have also lacked a layer of learning opportunities. Learning is not simply about the acquisition of knowledge. There have been many occasions when I have been able to apply what I’ve learned in our cohort to my own classroom practice, and then share the experience with my learning colleagues, while they do the same. Similarly, when I have experienced challenges in my teaching, I have had the support of my cohort. I see my classroom as a training ground where I can test out theories, and simultaneously develop as both teacher and learner. This support has helped reduce my previous cognitive dissonance, since I feel that my practice is becoming more reflective of my beliefs. Making peace with a liminal identity. When I began my graduate studies, the way I understood my student status was different than when I was an undergraduate student, studying to become a teacher. While previously, I was working towards the defined goal of becoming a teacher, my current goal was more nebulous. My earlier view of education, as I mentioned previously, was very technical-rational and linear: I entered into university, was filled with knowledge, and emerged a teacher. Now I see the liminal learning space as non-linear, allowing me to simultaneously occupy the roles of teacher and student. I am not on a linear path towards becoming a teacher, but working towards becoming a better teacher, with new ways of knowing. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 37 I found myself wondering what my next steps would be – in a way finishing my master’s degree would be anticlimactic compared to receiving my B.Ed. The liminal position of being a student is full of possibility and potential, but can also be a place of uncertainty: What happens when I finish my studies? While finishing graduate studies will be a major accomplishment, I no longer see it as being the end of learning. According to Garvey Berger (2004), “understanding is a process, not an outcome” (p. 348), and I see that the liminal space is where understanding develops. Rather than rushing to the finish line, I can appreciate the development of my understanding. A shift in perspective. Separating from my previous identity and entering the liminal space gave me a new perspective on teaching. I now realize that teaching art had been a sort of crutch for me. Art was a subject I knew well, and I had built my teaching identity around it. I felt that my teaching skills did not go beyond that subject. When I began my new position, I felt exposed. Instead of having my crutch, I was “on my own” so to speak. Beginning HEEL opened my eyes to different ways of knowing. It also helped change my ideas about what it meant to be a “good” teacher. If I were ever to return to my previous teaching position, I would not approach it the same way. In the past, I was often trying to be someone else. Now, in a job I had never imagined for myself, I am beginning to find my true teaching identity. Moving Forward In this chapter, I explored the separation from the familiar that occurs when entering into the liminal space. Incidents from both inside and out of the classroom have helped me see that while entering liminal space is challenging, it also offers great potential for growth. At times this new beginning is by choice, and at others it is due to circumstances out of our control. By embracing the change, we are less likely to get stuck in our learning. While this chapter was NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 38 about entering the liminal space, Chapter four will focus on the experience of living within that space. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 39 CHAPTER FOUR Lingering in the Liminal Space Nothing happens, and nothing happens, and then everything happens. –Fay Weldon In Chapter three, I described my experiences entering the liminal space of a new teaching area and beginning graduate studies. During this initial liminal period, I had a lot to get used to: separating from my previous, familiar existence, and moving forward into the unknown. While entering both spaces together has been challenging, each one has enhanced my experience of the other. In this chapter, I further examine the liminal state by explaining the characteristics of threshold concepts. I describe experiences I have had with oscillation and mimicry as I have lived within the liminal state, and explore how liminality can foster communitas. I also look at the connection between the theories of the Zone of Proximal Development, Legitimate Peripheral Participation and transformational teaching to explore how learning communities can help students overcome learning challenges, and move towards the threshold of understanding. Threshold Concepts According to Meyer and Land (2003), “a threshold concept can be considered as akin to a portal, opening up a new and previously inaccessible way of thinking about something. It represents a transformed way of understanding, or interpreting, or viewing something without which the learner cannot progress” (p. 1). Meyer and Land (2003, 2005) have created a framework of five characteristics to help identify threshold concepts in education. These concepts are considered to be transformative, irreversible, integrative, bounded, and troublesome. They are transformative, because once learned, they transform the learner’s view of the subject, and can also lead to changes in the learner’s identity. The irreversible aspect means NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 40 that once a threshold concept is learned, there is no going back to previous understanding. Threshold concepts are integrative, meaning that they can illustrate previously unseen connections between seemingly unrelated aspects of the subject. They may be bounded, meaning that they do not relate to the entire subject. Finally, threshold concepts are usually troublesome; they are challenging and not easy to come to terms with (Baillie, Bowden, & Meyer, 2013; Kiley, 2009; Land, Rattray, & Vivian, 2014; Meyer & Land, 2003, 2005). An interesting aspect of the threshold concept framework is that it is not set in stone. Meyer and Land (2003) use adverbs such as “probably”, “possibly often”, and “potentially” (pp. 5-6) to introduce certain characteristics of threshold concepts (e.g. probably irreversible, possibly often bounded), which to me suggests that there are variations to this theory, just as there are various pathways to understanding. As I have progressed through my graduate studies in home economics education, my understanding of the subject has greatly increased. Concepts that I had not previously understood have now become apparent to me. In Chapter five, I will revisit the characteristics of threshold concepts and explain what I believe to be threshold concepts for home economics education, based on Meyer and Land’s (2003, 2005) framework. Land, Meyer, and Baillie (2010) have represented the characteristics of threshold concepts relationally, attempting to describe a student’s journey through the preliminal, liminal, and postliminal stages of learning (see Figure 8). They caution against interpreting this process in a strictly linear sense, noting that recursiveness and oscillation commonly occur while acquiring threshold concepts, meaning that the learner does not always make forward progress. This would entail back-and-forth movement across the diagram (Land, Meyer, & Baillie, 2010). In my experience, my initial encounter with troublesome knowledge occurred when I began teaching elementary school and then began graduate studies. At this stage I was separated from NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 41 my familiar existence. Within the liminal space, I experienced an ontological and epistemological shift as my previous ways of knowing and of being were challenged. As illustrated in Figure 8, being in this space involves discarding previously held assumptions while integrating new understandings. This space is truly a space of becoming. As my journey ends, I am in the postliminal state, with a transformed perspective on teaching and learning. It is unlikely that I will return to my previous understanding of home economics education, or of education in general. Characteristics of Liminal Space Threshold concepts and liminal space are closely connected. Before a learner has fully grasped a threshold concept, they are in the liminal space between knowing and not knowing. There are three characteristics of the liminal state (Kiley, 2009; Meyer & Land, 2005). The first characteristic of liminality is an altered state, which for me was a new teaching position, and then becoming a graduate student. Figure 8. A relational view of the features of threshold concepts. Reprinted from Threshold Concepts and Transformational Learning (p. xii), by R. Land, J. H. F. Meyer, & C. Baillie (Eds.), 2010, Rotterdam, NLD: Sense Publishers. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 42 Second, the participant within the liminal state experiences a change of status, like the change I experienced going from being an experienced high school art teacher to a beginner elementary teacher. Becoming a student also relegated me to beginner status. It was unsettling to lose my previous sense of identity. According to Garvey Berger (2004), this stage entails “actually los[ing] a sense of the former world before the new world is fully articulated” (p. 338), which I elaborated in Chapter three. Before crossing the threshold to the new world, I existed in a sort of limbo. The third characteristic of the liminal state is oscillation, where one moves back and forth between states, even sometimes regressing to the comfort of previous ways (Kiley, 2009; Land, Rattray & Vivian, 2014; Meyer & Land, 2005; Tanner, 2011). During oscillation, people sometimes find themselves stuck, unsure of how to cross the threshold to understanding. One way of dealing with being stuck is to engage in mimicry. While mimicry can be a useful tool, such as when students follow the example of their teachers, it can also result in superficial knowledge (Garvey Berger, 2004; Kiley, 2009; Meyer & Land, 2005; Tanner, 2011). Oscillation, being stuck, and mimicry are often experienced as one attempts to attain (and cross) the learning threshold. Being stuck. In winter, my bike commute to work is just under 30 minutes. On the day I took the photo in Figure 9, I rode to work on cleared trails; however, after a day of heavy snowfall, the trails were completely engulfed in snow. As I left the school, I didn’t realize just what I was getting into until it was too late. I was able to ride on the occasional cleared sidewalk, or in spots where the snow had blown away, but even that required more exertion than usual just to keep moving. For much of the trip, I was pushing my bike through calf-high snow, not sure if I was even on the trail. At one point, I contemplated just abandoning my bike and NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 43 walking, but even then I would have to carry my heavy bag. It took me over an hour to get home, and when I did, I was exhausted. Moving past stuck places. This incident provides a concrete example of liminal space. I wonder how many times my students have felt like this in class: stuck and alone, not sure of how to proceed. In terms of liminal space, my cycling experience would represent a “stuck place” (Garvey Berger, 2004; Kiley, 2009; Meyer & Land, 2005; Tanner, 2011). As I rode home that day, I experienced oscillation. I left the school thinking that maybe my ride would be slightly more difficult than usual, but confident that I would make it home. As I progressed, I wondered whether I should turn back and find another way home. I also questioned the wisdom of cycling during the winter, thinking that I could have chosen an easier way to get around. At a certain point, I had gone so far that to turn around would be futile. I was discouraged; no matter how I Figure 9. Riding After a Storm. Personal photograph. Getting stuck in snow is like reaching stuck places in our learning. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 44 chose to proceed, it would be a struggle. While I kept going until I arrived home, many students will simply give up when faced with learning difficulties. As their teacher, it is my responsibility to help them get through their difficult times. I need to try and identify my students’ sticking points, and help them progress past difficult concepts. With Ted, for example, his fixation with being right often prevents him from trying new things, so I look for ways to encourage him to move beyond his comfort zone. When I’m winter biking, it’s important to have the proper attire, as seen in Figure 10. Similarly, helping students identify their sticking points and teaching them ways to progress in their learning is like providing them with the proper equipment to face the challenges ahead. Even with the proper gear, the road can be challenging, so it’s important to get students started off in the right way. Just as I wouldn’t think of leaving my helmet, bike light, and mitts behind, I need to ensure that my students are equipped with the proper tools to succeed in their learning. Figure 10. All Geared Up. Personal photograph. It’s important to be prepared to face the challenges ahead NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 45 When I told my story the next day, colleagues asked why I hadn’t left my bike at school and asked for a ride home. I had no reply - it had not occurred to me to ask for help. Although persevering through the snow on my own gave me a sense of accomplishment, I believe that if I found myself in the same situation again, I would be more likely to ask for help. We learn from our lived experience. In my academic journey, I would never have pushed myself to the same extent without the motivation of completing my degree, and the support of my HEEL community – both the instructors whom I see as the leaders, and the other students who are in the same position as me. Having the support of a community greatly enhances academic experiences, and helps students work through difficult times (Kiley, 2009). While liminal space, according to Meyer and Land (2005) is fluid, the looming deadline for my graduating project (a threshold) has provided a solid target. Community and Communitas A classroom consists of more than just a group of people working in the same place. Because students spend so much time together each day, developing a sense of community helps ensure that daily class operations run smoothly. I notice that when they are invested in the group, my students are more engaged in their learning. At the start of the school year, I establish routines that lead to smooth classroom functioning. We have a weekly rotation of routine tasks, such as handing out books, changing the date and organizing library books. When a student wanted to opt out of the task rotation, I explained that participation was like paying taxes: everybody has a responsibility to contribute to the class. If somebody is absent or unable to do their job, another student will step in to help. This is our community. While developing a sense of community in class is important for fostering a sense of belonging, communitas goes even deeper. The concept of communitas arises from liminality. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 46 According to the online Oxford Dictionary, communitas is “a strong sense of solidarity and bonding that develops among people experiencing a ritual, rite of passage, or other transitional state together” (Oxford Living Dictionaries, 2018). Communitas, or spontaneous community (Madson Ankeny & Maruggi, 2016), is the result of people gathered together in a liminal state, where hierarchies are set aside and everyone exists on the same level. Our HEEL cohort is an example of communitas. I was uneasy at the start of the program because of my lack of home economics experience, while many others were home economics teachers. It soon became apparent that despite our different backgrounds, we were all on equal footing within HEEL. We were all working on the same goal, supporting each other rather than creating hierarchies. Even our professors, experts within the field, joined us where we were. Communitas cannot be forced, but it can be fostered by teachers (Conroy & de Ruyter, 2009; Madson Ankeny & Maruggi, 2016). While I can’t force students to be friends, I work hard to ensure that there is a culture of respect in my classroom. Initiating the breakdown of hierarchies is my responsibility as a teacher. Being the teacher puts me in a position of power in the classroom, but I need to let my students know that on a personal level, we are all equal. Leading by example has included refraining from talking to other staff members during assemblies when students are expected to pay attention, asking other teachers to speak quietly in the library when students are being “shushed”, and even sitting on the floor with my students instead of in a “teacher” chair. We have a prayer intention board in our class that students can write on, as seen in Figure 11. Intentions can range from a family member undergoing surgery to a sick cat. If a class member is sick, someone usually puts their name on the board. I write my own intentions on the board, and we often write down prayer intentions for other school community members. This is an example NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 47 of communitas. While participation in class community tasks in an expectation, communitas is freely created. Experiencing communitas in extra-curricular activities. When I taught high school art, I was in charge of set design for our school’s yearly musical. This was a huge job that required a lot of student volunteers. The students who joined my crew each year were not always the most artistically gifted, but sometimes those who just needed a place to go. When I first started in that position, this frustrated me. I didn’t think the sets would turn out well if random students were the main artists. As the work progressed, however, I began to see an unanticipated development. The students who came to help ranged from Grades 8 through 12 and had varying degrees of artistic talent. They were not friends to begin with, but what they had in common was that they wanted to be part of something. What I noticed every season was the transformation that took place in these students. Figure 11. Prayer Intentions. Our prayer intention board is a space where students come together non-judgmentally to support each other. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 48 Painting a large wall-sized backdrop is much different than the work they had done in class, and those who were new to the crew were often unsure of how to proceed. We would start off painting large sections with rollers before proceeding to more detailed work. As we progressed, I would give more creative decisions to the students, letting them choose colours, or getting them to add in some detail. Students would begin to rely on each other as well. Instead of working separately, they began to come together as a team. Age and grade didn’t seem to matter as they collaborated together. Students who may have struggled to make friends in their classes had now found a peer group, and they thrived with the responsibility that was given to them. As I continued in my position, I noticed that the same students would take part year after year, providing mentorship for the newer members. This camaraderie would continue outside of the stage designing environment. Even after the musical was done, these students would continue to meet in the art room, sometimes to paint, and sometimes just to hang out. My experience with extra-curricular art has led me to question what was at the root of my students’ transformations and how I might foster such transformation in other teaching situations. Extra-curricular activities are liminal in relation to regular classes - they exist between the regular hours of school and home. Was it the more relaxed space of an extra-curricular activity that allowed students to thrive, or the shared activity? It may have been how I structured the large projects by letting them unfold organically and allowing students to help each other out. I believe that the development of communitas was an essential component to my students’ positive experience. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 49 Learning Theories that May Help Students Move Past Stuck Places We learn by example and by direct experience because there are real limits to the adequacy of verbal instruction. -Malcolm Gladwell, Blink, 2006 Zone of proximal development and legitimate peripheral participation. Finding ways of helping students navigate the liminal space of learning has been the subject of much research (Baillie, Bowden & Meyer, 2013; Garvey Berger, 2004; Kiley, 2009; Land, Rattray & Vivian, 2014; Meyer & Land, 2003, 2005; Tanner, 2011). While some students do so with relative ease, others tend to get stuck. When studying ways to assist doctoral students who were stuck in their learning journeys, Kiley (2009) found that most solutions included a collaborative aspect. This led her to examine Vygotsky et al.’s (1978) Zone of Proximal Development (ZPD) (see Figure 12) and Lave and Wenger’s (1991) Legitimate Peripheral Participation (LPP) (see Figure 13) as models for helping students collaborate to move beyond their stuck places. Both of these theories support the importance of a community to the learning process, as well as illustrate how those who are already within the community can help newcomers cross the threshold to understanding. The theories of ZPD and LPP imply that the students are active participants in their learning. While the Zone of Proximal Development demonstrates that learners can be helped by others to bridge the space between knowing and not knowing, Legitimate Peripheral Participation focuses specifically on communities of practice. ZPD and LPD have transformative potential for teaching and learning. They support authentic learning since they are transactive, rather than transmissive approaches to teaching. Transmission teaching, or traditional teaching, is the most popular form of teaching because it is NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 50 Figure 12. Zone of Proximal Development. From “Zone of Proximal Development,” by S. A. McLeod, 2012 (https://www.simplypsychology.org/Zone-of-Proximal-Development.html). Used under Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 Unported L Figure 13. Legitimate Peripheral Participation. From “Medical educators as curriculum innovators: using Communities of Practice as agents of change,” by A. Manca, 2014. (https://www.slideshare.net/annalisama/co-p2014). Used under Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 51 the simplest to do. In transmission teaching, teachers provide direct instruction to passive students (Christensen & Aldridge, 2013). In a class where the teacher simply “covers the curriculum”, there is little need for student engagement. As a result, students may have difficulty understanding more complex concepts. Supporting students through difficulties requires working alongside them, not simply telling them what to do – or what to know. Allowing students to be more active in their own learning is not always easy, since it requires relinquishing control on the part of the teacher. Transactive teaching involves more student interaction. The teacher’s role is that of a guide, and students work collaboratively with a variety of materials (Christensen & Aldridge, 2013). Transformational teaching. Transformational teaching goes even further. According to Slavich and Zimbardo (2012), it “involves creating dynamic relationships between teachers, students, and a shared body of knowledge in a way that promotes student learning and personal growth” (p. 576). This reaches far beyond the traditional transmissive teaching style (Christensen & Aldridge, 2013), and suggests a reciprocal relationship, where the students are actively involved along with the teacher. Meyers (2008) writes that “at its core, transformative pedagogy encourages [teachers] to do much more than transmit information” (p. 223). While transformative teaching is not mandated, its implementation can enrich the learning experience for teachers as well as for students. Johnson-Bailey (2012) reminds us that “transformational learning does not have to be sudden and severe, but can be cumulative” (p. 268). I find this encouraging, since small steps are easier to implement. Our school pen and marker recycling program started as a classroom project that grew to involve the whole school (see Figure 14). It is fully operated by students, besides my responsibility to haul the collection to the drop-off point. My students are proud of their efforts and they can see the results of working towards a NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 52 common goal. It’s exciting to see changes that have taken place, even when gradually implemented. As I gradually work at implementing more collaborative learning experiences within my classroom, I am reassured that even small changes to my practice can impact my students’ learning. Communities of Practice can Help Navigate Liminal Space Having the support of others can ease the transition through the liminal space of learning. Legitimate Peripheral Participation describes “how a community of practice accepts newcomers and how, through varying levels of participation, these newcomers develop to become ‘core’ practitioners within the community” (Kiley, 2009, p. 301). Communities of practice are defined as “groups of people who share a concern or a passion for something they do and learn how to do it better as they interact regularly” (Wenger-Trayner & Wenger-Trayner, 2015, p. 1). There are three components that are necessary for a community of practice to exist: a domain of interest, which is what brings members together; a community; and a practice (which must move beyond the theoretical state) (Wenger-Trayner & Wenger-Trayner, 2015). In the case of our HEEL cohort, our domain is home economics education: we have a shared commitment to this domain. Our community is our cohort members. We interact together and learn from each other, around our shared interest in home economics education. The final criterion is practice: together we share the stories and experiences we have had around home economics education. We are not simply theorizing; we are practicing. The community of practice serves not only as a tool to disseminate information, but also to create meaningful experiences that enrich our practice. We could also look beyond our cohort to the larger community of home economics professionals. Although we may not have the same personal contact with the larger community that we do with our cohort, sharing these three common NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 53 elements creates a community of practice. There is also potential to create communities of practice at school through participation in clubs and groups of like-minded students. When students have the opportunity to collaborate over shared interests, there is great potential for learning. Lave (1991) believes that education must be situated in context. According to her, legitimate peripheral participation involves both knowledge and identity: Newcomers become oldtimers through a social process of increasingly centripetal participation, which depends on legitimate access to ongoing community practice. Newcomers develop a changing understanding of practice over time from improvised opportunities to participate peripherally in ongoing activities of the community. Knowledgeable skill is encompassed in the process of assuming an identity as a practitioner, of becoming a full participant, an oldtimer. (p. 68) This theory demonstrates how those who have crossed the threshold to understanding can guide learners through the liminal learning space. Learning is not a simple process: understanding develops over time. Jordan (1989) uses the example of Mayan midwives to illustrate the gradual transition into a community of practitioners. In this case, girls gradually learn this trade through the constant exposure to, or peripheral participation in the community of practice. Theirs is not a formal education, but rather the result of years spent in close proximity to other midwives (usually mothers or grandmothers) and gradually adopting their practices (as cited in Lave, 1991, pp. 70-71). My own experience of learning by peripheral participation. Liminal space is a place of becoming, as we pass from one state of being to another. Learners pass through a liminal NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 54 space as they learn new concepts and new procedures. Learning is not only the result of direct instruction; it can be picked up from others whom we admire or with whom we spend time. School is an obvious learning environment, but a lot of learning takes place in the home. I can relate to this through my own experiences of learning to cook. I learned home economics at home, from my mother and grandmothers. While I was not learning a trade, from an early age, I spent time with these women in the kitchen. At times there was direct instruction, but a lot of what I learned came from just being present, watching, and being asked to help here and there. I would never have described this time in the kitchen as “cooking lessons”, but they taught me a lot. I learned about meal planning, stretching leftovers, substitutions and improvisations. While I began as an observer and occasional helper, there was the gradual transfer of responsibility so that by the time I was a teenager, I was preparing family meals, baking, and preserving food. The kitchen was not only a classroom; it was a centre of daily life. My paternal grandmother was an excellent pie baker, with the “magic touch” when it came to making perfect crusts. I always struggled with piecrust, finding it awkward to handle. As a result, I just avoided making pie, or would buy a frozen crust. When I began teaching art, teaching clay sculpture was a requirement. Since avoidance was not an option, and my ineptitude as a clay artist was painfully obvious, I began taking classes so I could teach it better. I gradually gained confidence with hand building, and clay sculpture was no longer overwhelming. Handling thinly rolled clay for delicate sculptures, I realized that it resembled piecrust. This gave me the confidence to try my hand at pies again, and with practice, I discovered that I almost had my grandma’s touch! NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 55 My maternal grandmother, while not a pie baker, made beautiful cakes. This is a skill that I have developed over many years of being my family’s birthday-cake baker. I recently recreated my parents’ wedding cake for their 50th anniversary, based on photos of the original cake that my grandmother had made (see Figure 14). I even had her original cake pans. I not only learned cooking techniques from these women, but that food is an expression of love. My experience is not only an example of learning by peripheral participation, but also of embodied knowledge. Learning to cook was not something I learned theoretically, but it came from active, hands-on practice, which is the sort of learning that takes place in home economics classes. Although I may have had a piecrust recipe to follow, until I had the feel for making pastry, I was stuck. While we often associate learning with academics, and theoretical knowledge is often valued above applied knowledge, embodied knowing, as a result of hands-on experience, Figure 14. Original Wedding Cake c. 1967, Fiftieth Anniversary Cake c. 2017 NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 56 can be a way of helping students become unstuck. For example, I’ve found that introducing movement and rhythm into class has helped students learn math skills. What we learn is not always explicitly taught. Rather than staying stuck on a concept, we sometimes avoid it altogether, or use mimicry to get through, without establishing a true understanding. I need to be aware of this in my classroom, so I don’t inadvertent ly discourage students from trying new things, if they see me avoiding them. When students see others do what they have difficulty with, it may give them the confidence to persist in their learning. A supportive learning community as well as hands-on experiences may lead to true understanding. Having the opportunity to practice skills rather than simply learning theory is a powerful learning tool. Teaching threshold concepts through peripheral participation in the classroom. In my classroom, I try to teach from an ecological perspective. Teaching ecological awareness must be done not only in a transmissive way, but also through actions. While I do teach lessons about issues such as recycling and pollution, I try to teach about these issues through modeling and regular classroom activities. Students notice when I ride my bike to school, since it is not a typical adult activity. This opens a conversation about the benefits of cycling; we have even calculated the amount of gas (and therefore emissions) I can save in a week of not driving. A few years ago I began a school-wide pen and marker recycling program (see Figure 15). We’ve made collection boxes for all the classrooms, and other students deliver their recyclables to my classroom. Once I explain the procedure to my students, they are in charge of running the program, and when a delivery arrives, they know what to do. They count and bag the markers, removing the caps and sorting them by colour in the hopes of creating a marker-cap mosaic down the road. We also have a bin in class filled with one-sided discarded photocopies that I NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 57 collect from staff workrooms. We used to use them for rough work only, but my students began to use them for good copies of work as well and I saw no reason to insist on using brand-new paper. They have changed the way that I view “scrap paper”. I appreciate how many of our classroom practices are becoming second nature, and I realize that my students are not the only ones who are learning new perspectives in class. Building a supportive classroom community. Although Kiley (2009) focuses on threshold concepts to help doctoral candidates, many of her ideas apply to my elementary classroom. Rather than myself (the teacher) always being the expert, I can engage my students by encouraging them to help each other in their learning journey. This not only helps the students who are struggling with new concepts, but it also gives a sense of purpose to those who have already crossed the threshold of understanding. By creating a sense of community, I hope to make collaboration a natural part of learning, in the hopes that school may be a more welcoming place. According to Kiley (2009), there are three identifiers that suggest that students will engage “in learning and transformation” (p. 302). These include:  having the support of their peers in helping them move from one level of understanding to another, Figure 15. Pen and Marker Recycling Bin. Personal Photograph. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 58  having a sense of control over the level of engagement and risk-taking they wish to pursue, and  learning through participation with others, rather than being taught explicitly. (Kiley, 2009). Keeping these three points in mind can help me develop a more inclusive, student-centered classroom. By allowing my students to be more involved in their own learning, I can help them avoid being stuck. In class, I sometimes find myself torn between wanting to help my students and wanting them to figure things out independently. I want them to know that I am there to help and support them, but I need to remind myself that the best way to help my students learn might be to allow them to work through problems on their own. If I oversimplify concepts for them, I may actually prevent my students from crossing the threshold to understanding, and instead cause them to settle for a false understanding (Land, Rattray, & Vivian, 2014; Meyer & Land, 2005). While the struggle on my bike was unpleasant, having finished it showed me what I am capable of, and gave me confidence in my abilities. Not that I want to subject my students to insurmountable challenges, but pushing them beyond their comfort zones, with support available, can help them grow. Unmasking Pedagogy Wearing a mask is another concrete example of a liminal experience. I have made masks with my students for several years, and am always impressed by both the creativity they show and the transformation that takes place during this activity (See Figure 16). When students design their masks, I ask them to create a personality and a name for the character they are creating. Once the masks are completed and the students put them on, they take NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 59 on the persona of the mask. These masks are an example of a liminal space: when they have them on, students are in an in-between position. Behind the mask, they have the freedom to adopt a new way of being, even if temporarily. They identify with the characters that they have created, and get to step out of their regular routine for a while. I created my own mask the first year I did this activity with students, and “she” still makes an appearance from time to time. My students enjoy interacting with this “different” me; it gives them the freedom to express themselves in ways they may not have otherwise, and also to see me in a different light. Masks and mimicry. When I first started teaching, I was advised to keep my personality under wraps. “Don’t let them see you smile until Christmas,” was the usual phrase. Trying to follow this advice felt like wearing a mask: stiff and uncomfortable. While I can appreciate the need to maintain a certain level of decorum in class, I believe that students need to see their teacher as a human being. Stifling my personality did not lead to an authentic way of teaching. When I attempted to keep up the serious front, I was mimicking what I thought a “good teacher” Figure 16. Masks Create Liminal Space. Personal photograph. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 60 should be. However, the danger with mimicry is that it can take the place of true learning and understanding (Kiley, 2009; Meyer & Land, 2005; Tanner, 2011). When I heard from parents that their child was enjoying my class, I felt like I was doing something wrong, rather than appreciating the compliment. Like McCaffery (2001), I felt that having fun in class was frivolous, and that learning should be a more serious endeavor. I have since come to realize that students learn better when they enjoy their learning (See Figure 17). “Joy is often overlooked in education, but can have far reaching consequences” (McCaffery, 2001, p. 49). This understanding has helped my shed the stiff mask and be myself. As a teacher, there are times when I need to mask my true feelings, like not laughing at a student’s inappropriate comment. We may put on masks when we find ourselves in the liminal space between theory and practice. When we learn new approaches to teaching, putting them into practice can sometimes feel like we’re trying out new ways of being. Wearing a mask while Figure 17. Smile! Spontaneous lunch art. Personal photograph. It's important to take time for fun in the classroom. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 61 teaching can be a way of hiding insecurities, but it may also cause cognitive dissonance, especially when our actions don’t match our beliefs. For me, teaching from the technical-rational perspective was an ill-fitting mask. I did things that I felt proper teachers would do, such as creating worksheets that could easily be graded and going overboard on class control. However, these actions did not align with my beliefs. In order to move from one state to another, we must be willing to shed old masks, and be fully present. When I teach authentically, students have more positive learning experiences (see Figure 18). I’ve worked at letting go of insecurities and making the leap to new understandings. Too often, the division between student and teacher is very evident. The teacher is up at the front, delivering the lesson, while the students are sitting quietly at their desks, ostensibly learning. In reality, students learn best when they are not desk-bound and quiet. On days when there are meetings to sit through, I am very aware of how difficult it is to sit quietly for long stretches. Even during meetings, adults are permitted to have snacks, drink coffee, and go to the washroom without asking permission. One identity that teachers should be more willing to don is that of a student. In the first place, it may allow us to appreciate students’ points of view. Also, Figure 18. Thank-you card. Teaching authentically can enhance students' learning experiences. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 62 adopting a student’s perspective would permit us to be open to learning new things, rather than insisting on being the expert. We can pass that mask on to our students, so that they get the chance to have their voices heard and their ideas validated. A class where everyone wears the mask of a learner would blur hierarchical boundaries and create new learning opportunities for all involved. We don’t need to hide behind masks; we can use them to explore new possibilities. Summing Up In this chapter, I explained threshold concepts and the characteristics of liminal space. I examined some challenges that I have experienced within liminal space, and I used examples from my own life and teaching experiences to look for ways to help my students navigate the liminal space of their own learning. I explored the potential of collaborative learning for helping students move past stuck places, as well as the importance of teaching authentically. In Chapter five I will explore the final phase of my liminal journey as my understanding develops and I move from being a home economics outsider to an insider in the profession. Existing within the liminal space of home economics has helped me identify what I believe to be threshold concepts that are key to understanding this profession. As I have studied home economics education, my overall views of curriculum and pedagogy have changed, and I will examine the potential for home economics to be taught across the curriculum. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 63 CHAPTER FIVE Passing through Liminal Space We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love… and then we return home. – Australian Aboriginal Proverb In Chapter three, I described my experiences as I entered into liminal space. This was a period fraught with tension and uncertainty, as I made the leap from my familiar and comfortable existence into an unknown state. In Chapter four, I introduced threshold concepts, explaining the characteristics that can help identify them as well as their significance to learning. My exploration of liminal space continued, as I described existing within this space, and even becoming accustomed to it. Threshold concepts and liminal space are inextricably linked, as one exists within liminal space en route to fully grasping threshold concepts. Instead of being frightening, liminal space had become a place of discovery and learning, where uncertainty was the norm. In this space, I discovered the potential that exists in “not knowing”. Chapter five is about the final stage of my liminal journey, as I approach the threshold of completing my graduate studies. I provide an overview of home economics, and describe my experiences with this subject. Then, following Meyer and Land’s (2003, 2005) framework of threshold concepts (that they are transformative, irreversible, integrative, bounded, and troublesome), I explain what I believe to be home economics threshold concepts, based on my experiences. These include everyday life, world as home, interdisciplinarity, and community. As I cross the threshold from home economics outsider to insider, I also examine my new role as a teacher of home economics, and the potential that exists for teaching home economics throughout the curriculum. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 64 A New Perspective on Home Economics Education I began my graduate studies after a lengthy search for a program that I found personally meaningful. I had had the opportunity to pursue a variety of master’s programs, including some that were fully funded, but even with a financial incentive, none of them spoke to me. When I first heard about HEEL, I was teaching elementary school and had no formal home economics education, but the program description really appealed to me. My previous understanding of home economics was what many people consider it to be: cooking and sewing. Seeing that the HEEL themes were “interdisciplinary inquiry, human-environment interactions, local and global communities, ecological sustainability, researching practice, and social responsibility” (Professional Development & Community Engagement, 2015), I began to realize that home economics ran much deeper than the traditional limited view that I had. This was a subject that aligned with my personal beliefs and values, and I wanted to deepen my understanding of it. I believed that further inquiry into home economics could greatly enhance my teaching practice, no matter what I was teaching. When I began the HEEL program, I knew that I had a very limited understanding of home economics. This could be partially due to the widespread view of home economics as a cooking and sewing class, or to the various names that it has gone by. Because of its broad scope, home economics is not easy to define. Home Economics: A Brief Overview Home economics is a discipline that has been known by many names: human ecology, human development, home and family life, consumer services, technical and industrial education, applied sciences, and business and resource management (East, 1980). One of the original definitions of home economics comes from the Lake Placid Conference of 1902: NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 65 Home economics in its most comprehensive sense, is the study of laws, conditions, principles and ideals which are concerned on the one hand with man’s [sic] immediate physical environment and on the other hand with his nature as a social being, and is the study specially of the relation between these two factors (American Home Economics Association, 1902, cited in East, 1980; Nelson, 1979/1995). The current definition of home economics by the International Federation of Home Economics (2008) is “a field of study and a profession, situated in the human sciences that draws from a range of disciplines to achieve optimal and sustainable living for individuals, families and communities” (IFHE, 2008, in Smith & de Zwart, 2010, p. 21). Since its inception, there has been much debate and discussion about the true nature of home economics, as well as its place in society and in formal education. Although its name and definition may have changed over time, home economics has always been concerned with enhancing the quality of daily life for families and individuals (Bubolz & Sontag, 1988; East, 1980; McGregor & Chesworth, 2005; McGregor, 2012; Peterat, 1989; Simpson, 1973/1995; Smith & de Zwart, 2011; Vaines, 1997a). Originally seen as a woman’s science, advocates of home economics education emphasize that it applies to everyone, regardless of gender (Brown, 1980; East, 1980; Simpson, 1973/1995; Smith & de Zwart, 2010), and there is currently an increasing demand for home economics classes in schools (Smith & de Zwart, 2010). Threshold Concepts for Home Economics Education While there is a lot of literature about threshold concepts in education, I did not find any that specifically discussed threshold concepts for home economics education. In the following section, I describe various aspects of home economics: everyday life, ecological NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 66 perspective/world as home, interdisciplinarity, and community. I then explain how I believe they fit into Meyer and Land’s (2003, 2005) threshold concept framework. While there are undoubtedly many more threshold concepts that can extend theorizing in home economics, these are the ones I have identified through my research and experiences. Since home economics is considered a practical/applied art, embodied learning would be an example of another potential threshold concept. Everyday life. Smith and de Zwart (2010) argue that home economics “is the only subject area that focuses on everyday life and meeting basic needs” [emphasis in original] (p. 17). It is unfortunate and puzzling then, that so many home economics programs are struggling to stay afloat or to receive recognition for their valuable contributions (Peterat, 1989; Smith & de Zwart, 2010). Perhaps due to its beginnings as a discipline for women, home economics has not been seen to be as important as other core subjects in schools (East, 1980, Peterat, 1989). Part of the problem is that it has often been an ‘option’ class, as opposed to being part of the ‘basic’ curriculum (Peterat, 1989; Aoki, 2004b). Because of its theme of studying everyday life, home economics should be given more attention, since it is a topic that affects everyone. Everyday life is the first threshold concept that I have identified for home economics. The idea that home economics is education for everyday life has transformed the way that I understand it. Everyone, regardless of gender and social status can benefit from learning home economics. Once people understand that home economics covers all areas of human life, their perception of it will change. It will no longer be relegated to the sidelines, to a women’s discipline, to just cooking and sewing. This concept also contains the potential for transforming individuals on a personal level, as they realize how home economics touches their lives. Once NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 67 people realize how home economics education affects all aspects of their life, it is impossible to ignore. When concepts are integrative, they illustrate connections that may not have previously been visible. The integrative aspect of a concept is the “moment when ‘it’ makes sense” (Kiley, 2009, p. 297). The idea that home economics reaches beyond the household, as we understand it, is one such concept. Seeing home economics as education for everyday life involves not only our immediate surroundings, but allows us to make farther-reaching connections. Considering the various names that home economics has been given, we can see that it goes beyond cooking and sewing. As an applied science, home economics is bounded by formal science. Home economists put scientific theory into practice. The troublesome nature of home economics education is that it has so often been marginalized and deemed unimportant compared to other disciplines. Home economics remains an optional class in most school curriculums, while maths and sciences make up the basic, or compulsory, curriculum (Aoki, 2004b; Smith & de Zwart, 2010). It is troublesome for people to immediately grasp the significance of home economics education when faced with such culturally ingrained perspectives. As I have been conducting my research, I’ve been thinking about how I could define my teaching role once I’ve completed the HEEL program. While I feel like I am now a part of the home economics community, I don’t feel like I can call myself a home economics teacher. That title suggests somebody who teaches home economics exclusively, or who teaches it as a stand-alone subject. I think it is more fitting to say that I am a teacher of home economics. My view of home economics is like that of Vaines (1994) and Smith (2008), where home relates to the world, and economics, rather than being about money, NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 68 refers to managing resources in ways such as “stewardship...sharing...and judicious use of resources” (Smith, 2008, p. 6), which may be taught in any subject area. I may never have a dedicated home economics class to teach, but using ecology as a unifying theme (Vaines, 1994), I can incorporate home economics principles into my Grade 5 curriculum, even indirectly. For example, recycling has become a habit in our class, from stuffing pillows with plastic bags, collecting used pens and markers from around the school (even sometimes receiving donations from outside the school), to using discarded paper for school work and art projects. While I used to bring candy as occasional treats, I now look for healthier (and more discussion-provoking) alternatives, as shown in Figure 19. This in turn has prompted some students to influence their parents’ shopping decisions, demonstrating that home economics goes beyond the classroom. Ecological perspective: world as home. Human ecology, currently a popular term for home economics, appears to emphasize the multidisciplinary aspect of home economics, taking a broader view of the word “home” to include not only near, but farther-reaching environment (Bubolz & Sontag, 1988; McGregor, 2010; Nelson, 1979/1995; Smith, 2004; Smith & de Zwart, Figure 19. Perfectly Imperfect. Personal photo. Small changes can have far-reaching effects. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 69 2010; Smith & de Zwart, 2011; Vaines, 1994, 1997a, 1997b). Vaines (1997a, 1997b) uses the metaphor of world as home to illustrate the importance of an ecological perspective. This affects not only the topics that are being taught in home economics classes, but also the ways in which these topics are approached (Nelson, 1979/1995; Smith, 2004.; Vaines, 1997a, 1997b). Vaines (1997a, 1997b) encourages a reflective practitioner approach to teaching. According to Vaines (1997b), “Reflective Practice is grounded in a moral vision requiring professional commitment to belief systems, honoring fairness, caring, and equity” (p. 5). A list of her questions to help guide reflective practice can be found in Appendix A. Nelson (1979/1995) argues that to teach from an ecological perspective enriches the course content, as it encourages students to think more broadly. Nelson (1979/1995) believes that in our rapidly changing society, an ecological teaching approach can help build confidence in students, allowing them to explore alternative solutions to problems. She prepared a list of questions to help teachers analyze their teaching plans from an ecological standpoint (see Appendix B). Smith (2004) believes that global content should be integrated into the curriculum rather than taught as a separate unit. To oversimplify global issues can reinforce prejudices and stereotypes. What Smith (2004) calls “a ‘tourist’ approach” (p. 1) to teaching global content is what Meyer and Land (2005) call a false proxy, which leads to “ritualized learning or mimicry” (p. 382). Oversimplifying concepts can be more of a hindrance than a help to full understanding (Meyer & Land, 2005; Smith, 2004). Smith prepared a guide for lesson plan remodelling to allow teachers to integrate a global perspective within their lessons (see Appendix C). If we are to consider the world as home, it is important to expand students’ views beyond the traditional home setting. Seeing home economics from this perspective can also help move it beyond the NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 70 stereotype of simply cooking and sewing. The interconnectedness of the ecological approach has also opened my eyes to new possibilities for cross-curricular integration of home economics. The concept of world as home is transformative because it gives us a new way of looking at “our home”. While home economics has typically been associated with women, there is no denying that our planet is the responsibility of all citizens. Seeing the world as our home also creates bonds between ourselves and all those who inhabit it, humans and animals alike. If we view home economics from an ecological perspective, our views of what constitutes caring for our home and its inhabitants will transform. Once it is understood, the ecological perspective is not easily forgotten. This must go beyond surface actions; we can begin with the habit of recycling, for example, but our learning won’t be irreversible until we truly understand the impact of our actions on the environment, near and far. The integrative aspect of this concept is that it creates connections between near and far environments. It shows us how our regular actions, done at home, can have a much farther-reaching global impact than we realized. Instead of seeing our decisions as only impacting ourselves, we can see how all living things are connected. The previously unseen web that ties us together is now visible. This concept can also be troublesome, since it entails looking beyond surface labels, and thinking critically about our habits. For example, organic foods that must be shipped thousands of miles no longer seem like a healthy choice (Prakash, 2009). I used to order “earth-friendly” cosmetics online until I noticed the excessive packing materials being used, as seen in Figure 20). Chocolate producers may have a fair trade chocolate bar on offer, but what about the rest of their line? Treating the world as our home is not always easy, even when we have crossed the threshold to understanding. Once we have grasped its importance, however, it becomes easier to make the effort. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 71 A different spin on sewing class. I came up with the T-shirt pillow idea while I was out on a run. It was the summer before starting graduate studies, and I had a lot on my mind. I was wondering how (or if) I could build home economics into my teaching practice, and worrying about my new students, whom I had heard were a handful. I wanted to come up with an activity that would engage them, but because of budget restraints, I couldn’t buy many supplies. As I turned over sewing ideas in my mind, I thought about my grandma. She had been an avid seamstress who often came up with innovative ideas for her projects, like stuffing dolls and pillows with plastic bags. While I had always seen this as being depression-era thriftiness, I realized that it also had environmental implications. The plastic-bag filling led me to the idea of the T-shirt pillow, which would not only teach students basic embroidery skills (that we could do in art class), but provide a hands-on lesson about recycling. By the time I got home from my run, the idea was fully formed. I went straight to my closet where I dug out an old T-shirt to use as a prototype. Figure 20. Unnecessary packaging. Personal photograph. We need to think critically about our purchases, such as when a company’s actions do not match their message. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 72 My students loved the T-shirt project, and once again, I witnessed collaborative learning in action. There was a wide range of sewing ability among my students, and it was really nice to see the more skilled students patiently assisting the others through their work. While the stitches were uneven and the stuffing was often lumpy, most students kept their pillows at school until the end of the year, as seen in Figure 21. This activity has been popular with both male and female students, and I’ve seen some students with learning difficulties gain confidence from their handiwork. After three years, the T-shirt pillows have become a Grade 5 class tradition. I like that it provides a tangible lesson about recycling, which may otherwise remain an abstract concept. Doing this project at the start of the school year not only starts the conversation about the importance of recycling, but it sets the tone for a collaborative classroom environment. Interdisciplinarity. Another threshold concept that I have identified for home economics is interdisciplinarity. Home economics, as education for everyday life, can be introduced into other subject areas. Because I don’t teach an actual home economics class, I’m always looking for ways to integrate it within my curriculum. The following anecdote describes one such experience: Figure 21. T-shirt pillows. While in the past I may have taught this to encourage perfect stitching, now I teach it from an ecological perspective: the importance of recycling. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 73 “I have a surprise for you today,” I told my class as they came in. They looked at the board where I’d written: There is a surprise today. We will start with 15 minutes of silent reading, or you can work on writing or math problems. “Is the silent reading the surprise?” asked one student. (Their reaction when I told them that it wasn’t, made me realize I need to give them more silent reading time in class.) They were excited about having silent reading and a surprise. The surprise in question was a YouTube video of a cooking demonstration that I had created for a food studies class (see Figure 22). I paused the video near the beginning so they could comment on what they noticed. We talked about hygiene when they picked out my apron and ponytail, and one student noticed the mise en place. The subject of the video was vegan mayonnaise made from aquafaba, or chickpea liquid, and they seemed impressed as they watched the ingredients come together. After the video, I pulled an apron out of my bag and my students cheered. I pulled my (now much shorter) hair into a clip and washed my hands. Our current science unit is about the properties of matter, so we were able to discuss how the ingredients were transformed, as well as how important precise measurements are. Their reaction to the real-time demo was good – they could see that it Figure 22. Making Aquafaba Mayonnaise. YouTube video still. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 74 did come together almost instantly. When I took out a box of crackers, they again cheered. “We get to taste it?” I hadn’t imagined not sharing it with them. Sharing this video and demonstration with my students reinforced for me the importance of connections. They were able to see me as a real person, like them, nervous to show my video to the class. They saw how simply a staple like mayonnaise could come together (many didn’t know you could make it). They asked questions about the benefits of making vegan, rather than regular mayo, and we discussed the ecological implications of how aquafaba, a product that would normally be thrown out, could be repurposed in such a way. The concept of interdisciplinarity has been transformative to my teaching. When I started teaching Grade 5, I would never have thought of doing this lesson, since I did not see how it fit with the curriculum. If I had done it, I would have felt nervous about being “caught”. I didn’t understand that integrating subjects is an effective and authentic way of teaching. Since I had a separate curriculum guide for each subject, I had assumed that I was to teach everything separately. Now, I can see that such a lesson goes beyond the official curriculum. Although my teaching assignment has not changed, my approach to teaching has, and I feel more confident with creative lesson planning. Interdisciplinary teaching such as the vegan mayo lesson is integrative, since it combines various curricular areas such as science, health, and even French language arts (students must now present their own step by step activity). I could have simply taught my students about the properties of matter and had them answer questions on a work sheet, but nothing can compare to the fun and excitement that took place in class. The shared experience is important since it allowed for social connections. As I gain teaching experience, I am more comfortable blending theory and practice together, and ideas build on each other: next time we could cook chickpeas in NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 75 the slow cooker and make our own aquafaba, we could compare the price of a can of chickpeas to the cost of cooking them at home, and so on. Suddenly our vegan mayo lesson takes on a life of its own. This concept is irreversible in my mind: I will not forget its importance. Community. Community is another threshold concept that I have identified for home economics. Understanding the importance of community to home economics education (and education in general) has been transformative for me. Previously, I knew that there was an expectation that students do collaborative work in class, but I personally did not see the value in it. When only grades are emphasized, group work can be fraught with tension, and struggling students may resort to mimicry, presenting only superficial knowledge. When communities are established to support students in their learning, through authentic learning situations, they create the potential for deep and lasting understanding. Reflecting on instances of collaborative learning that I have witnessed both in and out of the classroom, I realize that I hadn’t previously seen what was in front of me. Learning together is not only fun, but effective as well. I’ve learned this firsthand from my experiences with our HEEL cohort. Now that I’ve seen the positive effects that belonging to a community has on learners, I am unlikely to forget it. The troublesome aspect of this threshold concept comes from traditional teaching practices that encourage individual work. If we are simply looking for the acquisition of knowledge, we will be less likely to provide collaborative opportunities to our students. If the work that students are given is simply filling in question sheets, we may worry that they would copy off each other if they work together. Creating a collaborative learning environment involves changing the way that we approach teaching, focusing on process as well as on product. If students are able to support each other in their learning, as well as enjoy the process, they will be more successful learners. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 76 Home economics is a field of study that has community at its core, seeking “to achieve optimal and sustainable living for individuals, families and communities” (IFHE, 2008, in Smith & de Zwart, 2010, p. 21). If I can start off by involving students within their class and school communities, there is an opportunity to show them the role they may play within the world. Vaines’ (1997) concept of world as home emphasizes the interconnectedness of all living things. If students can understand the concept of world as home, they may begin to see that they belong to, and are supported by, a much larger community. From outsider to insider. During my second year of graduate studies, I had the opportunity to attend the Canadian Symposium XIV, Issues and Directions for Home Economics/Family Studies/ Human Ecology Education. While I was initially going as a spectator, my professors encouraged me to do a presentation. I did not feel qualified, but I decided to take on the challenge as a learning opportunity. I spent hours preparing and practicing my presentation, but still worried that my lack of home economics expertise would be obvious. Although I had been studying home economics for nearly two years, I still felt like an outsider within the discipline. The online format of my master’s cohort offered a certain level of anonymity, while here I would not only be in the spotlight, but also out of the security of the student environment. As the weekend progressed, I was engaged by the various presentations, and enjoyed discussions with other attendees, but still, when it was time for my presentation, I was worried about whether I’d be able to adequately answer any questions. When I finished, the first question caught me off guard: “Where did you get your skirt?” That served as an icebreaker, making me forget my nervousness. I realized then that nobody was judging my presentation. Here, the line between professional and student was blurred, and what brought us together was a passion for home economics. I had worn my skirt NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 77 (see Figure 23) as a security blanket, not even considering that it would be interesting to a room of home economics teachers! After that weekend, I began to see myself as belonging within the home economics community. Existing in liminal space can be an unsettling experience. It is a sort of no-man’s land, where not much is familiar, and constant questioning is the norm. Depending on the sort of experience, liminality can vary in length, and the learner often experiences oscillation, which involves having moments of clarity and a sense of emerging from the fog, followed by a re-entry into its depths. When I contemplated presenting my paper at the symposium, I felt like I was engaging in mimicry (Kiley, 2009; Land, Rattray & Vivian, 2014; Meyer & Land, 2005; Tanner, 2011). Although I was enjoying my courses and was learning a great deal about home economics, I wasn’t a “real” home economics teacher so I didn’t feel like I belonged to the community. Figure 23. The Hippie Skirt. Watercolour and ink. Sketching helps me understand my experiences. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 78 Having support as you move through liminal space can offer a sense of security. Something I appreciated about attending the home economics symposium was that it allowed for face-to face interaction. While the online platform of our cohort is excellent for promoting communication at any time, nothing can beat a face-to face conversation. As I discussed some of my current class projects with my advisor, she pointed out that I was teaching home economics. This conversation allowed me to see what I actually was doing, instead of focusing on what I was not (Baillie, Bowden & Meyer, 2013). This was a nodal moment, “central to teaching and learning to teach” (Bullough & Pinnegar, 2001, p. 16), when I started to see that I was indeed on the path to becoming a home economics teacher. My experience at Symposium XIV was a sort of emergence, where I was afforded a glimpse of the road ahead. I consider it to be a mini “rite of passage” (Czarniawska & Mazza, 2003; Field, 2012; Kiley, 2009; Pierce, 2007; Wood, 2012), a small threshold that I crossed en route to my greater goal of becoming a home economics “insider”. As I have reflected on my time within liminal space, I realize that it is not a tidy, linear process. During my learning journey, I have encountered a variety of thresholds, or stepping-stones to understanding. Although at times I have felt myself faltering, I have continued to make progress. I now find myself within Aoki’s (2004b) “rhizomean landscape” (p. 420), a potential-filled space of in-between, where new curricular understanding is brought to life. The more I dwell within this landscape of possibility; I see that learning does not follow a linear path, and that new learning opportunities can appear unbidden. According to Gilles Deleuze (in Aoki, 2004b), “every multiplicity grows in the middle” (p. 420). While my official curriculum, or curriculum-as-plan (Aoki, 2004b) does not include the subject area of home economics, I am introducing its concepts within my live(d) curriculum (Aoki, 2004a, 2004b). NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 79 Sometimes just a little bit of reassurance can make all the difference. The rite of passage that I experienced at the symposium was not only the presentation of my paper, but also my acceptance into the home economics community. Before I made my presentation, I told myself that it didn’t matter if I presented poorly, since I wouldn’t see most of the participants again. As it turned out, even if I had done poorly, my efforts were still appreciated. Furthermore, I wanted to meet up with these people again; after all, we belong to the same community of practice. This helped me to realize that with my students, a little reassurance could go a long way. For some of them, doing a presentation in front of the class is as stressful as presenting at the symposium was for me. If I can help them feel truly supported, they might feel less anxiety. This support can be in the form of acknowledging their strengths, or even just what they are attempting to do. The end of a presentation is not the time to ask difficult questions, but to give students the chance to see what they are truly doing well and that they have the support of their learning community. Emerging Into New Possibilities I created the collage in Figure 24 many years ago, at a stage in my life when I found myself in a stuck place. At the time, I was questioning the direction of my life, my living and my working situations. I was terrified of being stuck, and just going through the motions of life. As previously mentioned, I use art as a way of interpreting my experiences, and I made this collage to help me cope with the stuck place I was in. It represents the power that I have: I don’t need to be boxed in; I can break through barriers and head out into the unknown. While I know that some people fear the unknown, I worry about being caught in a rut. Although at the time that I made it, I didn’t know where my path would lead, creating this collage helped me see that I had it within myself to take control and to push through my difficulties. It gave me hope. I also used some of this imagery in my a/r/tography self -NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 80 portrait (see Figure 6). In that image, the space within the portal depicts the same galaxy as the bird in Figure 24 is bursting into. This galaxy illustrates the vast possibilities that exist beyond what I now know. At this stage in my learning journey, the image is still relevant, although in a different context. While I used to feel confined in my role as a teacher, I now imagine the many possibilities that are ahead of me, awaiting discovery. I’m no longer viewing this image as an escape, but rather an emergence into new possibilities. While the liminal space can be full of questioning and uncertainty, it is also a somewhat safe place. If I have not yet “fully arrived”, there are fewer expectations of me. If I can claim to be new or in the process of becoming, my shortcomings may be overlooked. As I emerge from my liminal learning journey with a master’s degree in home economics education and the unofficial title of “teacher of home economics”, I am looking forward to the responsibility that Figure 24. Exit into the Unknown. Collage. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 81 this new status offers. While I am not completely confident with my new status, this journey of becoming has transformed the way that I understand, and therefore approach, my role as a teacher. What I Have Learned about Liminality and Home Economics Education At the beginning of graduate studies, someone told us that we were in for a roller-coaster ride. At the time, I wasn’t really sure what to expect, but the roller-coaster was an apt metaphor. In the last three chapters, I have described my learning journey, which has involved separating from my familiar existence, lingering in liminal space, with all its questioning and uncertainty, and finally emerging into a place of new understanding. I feel that my learning experience has been enhanced by not only learning about liminal space, but also by recognizing that I exist within it. Recognizing my position within liminal space gives me insights into the experiences of my students in the classroom, as they struggle to learn new concepts. I now feel more connected to them. Throughout my learning journey, I have encountered several key concepts. First of all, learning is hard. While curriculum documents are often set up in a step-by-step fashion, learning does not always follow a linear path. In order to succeed in learning, we need to anticipate difficulties, and come to terms with the fact that it’s okay – even for the teachers - not to have all the answers. There will be times of being stuck, and oscillating between old and new ways of knowing. I believe that I am now more prepared to recognize this state in my students, and help them through it. While I used to treat group work as an add-on to regular teaching, I now recognize the potential of collaboration for helping students move through stuck places in their learning. I have learned to embrace my strengths, which I used to undervalue. This reminds me to seek out the strengths in my students, and to help them see the potential that they hold. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 82 Developing communitas by removing hierarchies can provide an encouraging learning environment in the classroom. The threshold concepts that I have identified for home economics will continue to shape my teaching practice as I teach from an ecological perspective and continue to incorporate home economics principles into other curricular areas. While learning is hard, it sometimes seems scarier than it really is. Having the support of a community can assist with taking the initial plunge. I have been fortunate to have the support of my HEEL community throughout my learning journey. Since the liminal space is “the place within which [a] transition takes place” (Cook-Sather, 2006, p. 110), it follows that I will experience liminal spaces regularly, as I continue to grow and develop. While not all liminal experiences are as dramatic or as clearly defined as passing through a graduate program, encountering liminality is a natural part of personal and professional growth. Crossing the final threshold to emerge from this liminal space does not signal the end of my learning, it simply signifies the beginning of a new liminal learning space. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 83 CHAPTER SIX Reflecting on my Transformative Liminal Journey Educators are always in process, not afraid of change and conflict. Educators live in the dynamism of transformation. All the time. – Carl Leggo In my previous chapters, I have explored my journey through liminal space, throughout which I have been in a state of becoming, oscillating between here and there, old and new. I have described the discomfort of entering an unfamiliar realm, the confusion of existing within it, and the excitement of finally emerging into a new understanding. While for the duration of my journey I have had an idea of where I was heading, I had no idea exactly how it would turn out. My trajectory has not always been straightforward, and although at times I longed for a simple path, my struggles along the way have, I believe, led me to become a stronger teacher. In this final chapter, I reflect upon my changed views about curriculum and pedagogy, as well as how I have experienced transformation throughout my learning journey. My New Understanding of Curriculum and Pedagogy As I have progressed through my graduate studies, my time within the liminal space has led me to a deeper understanding of curriculum and pedagogy across a variety of subject areas. Although I am a teacher, these were not concepts that I gave much thought to, besides knowing that I had to cover my curriculum. I also did not realize how studying home economics education would shape my whole outlook on teaching. I had assumed that I would enter the program (thinking in the linear way to which I was accustomed), learn about how to teach home economics, and emerge with the title of home economics teacher. I see now that the journey of NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 84 becoming has been far more important than the final title I will end up with. Although I learned about curriculum and pedagogy through the lens of home economics education, it was not a “how to teach” course. Becoming a better teacher does not simply entail memorizing the official curriculum. I now understand that my responsibility is to live the curriculum with my students, rather than imposing it on them. While I have my official curriculum to follow, my lived curriculum sometimes follows a different path. Last year, my class helped the first grade students in the class next to ours plant seeds for an Easter project. It was a lot of fun for everyone, especially the younger students, who expected Jack and the Beanstalk magic to take place. While neither of our curricula included growing plants, the other teacher led her students through an exploration of the growing cycle. Some of my students asked to plant the remaining seeds for our class, so we ended up with peas and sunflowers growing on our window ledge. The shared planting activity created a bond between the two classes, and the younger kids started visiting our class to see how our plants were progressing. My students took responsibility for watering the plants, and they enjoyed seeing them shoot up. When the sunflowers were approaching three feet tall, we drew names for them. This was a learning opportunity that would have been missed if I were teaching strictly by the book, trying simply to “cover” the curriculum. Figure 25 is a photo I took from the classroom window as one of my students carried his prize home. Curriculum. Curriculum is often seen as the what in education, but surprisingly, there is not one simple definition or interpretation of it. Eisner and Vallance (1974) give an oblique definition of curriculum through the following question: “What can and should be taught to whom, when, and how?” (p.2). The most common view of curriculum is the official, or intended, NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 85 curriculum, seen as a document (Schubert, 2008). This is the “curriculum-as-plan” described by Aoki (2004a, 2004b, 2004c). The curriculum-as-plan, however, does not take into account the lived experiences of the teachers and students in the classrooms. Curricula are not value-free; rather they are shaped by people who have their own distinct views and opinions about what is important enough to be included (Aoki, 2004a; Eisner & Vallance, 1974). Eisner and Vallance’s (1974) five curricular orientations seek to categorize the various ways that curriculum can be presented, from traditional discipline-oriented education, to a more community-centered approach. These correspond to Vaines’ (1997a, 1997b) modes of practice: Eisner and Vallance’s (1974) academic rationalism aligns with Vaines’ (1997a, 1997b) technical-rational teacher, while their social reconstruction approach ties in with Vaines’ (1997a, 1997b) view of a reflective practitioner. While official curriculum plans exist, the way the curriculum is taught Figure 25. Carrying Home a Sunflower. Personal Photograph. These sunflowers, although not part of the official curriculum, enriched students’ learning experience. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 86 does not always align with the official plan (Schubert, 2008). Other forms include experienced curriculum, hidden curriculum, null curriculum and outside curriculum (Schubert, 2008, pp.13-15). Currere. William Pinar’s (1975/1994) view of curriculum aligns with the idea of studying lived experience. He focuses on currere, which is the lived and enacted form of curriculum. As such, his method takes a more active approach to studying curriculum. Pinar (1975/1994) describes his method as “regressive—progressive—analytical—synthetical. It is therefore temporal and conceptual in nature, and it aims for the cultivation of a developmental point of view that is trans-temporal and trans-conceptual” (p. 19). These descriptors align with Clandinin’s (2006) process of narrative inquiry, and honour the diversity of the lived experience (Aoki, 2004c; Irwin, 2013). Currere aligns more with curriculum-as-lived than curriculum-as plan. A/r/tography also embraces this idea. According to Sameshima and Irwin (2008), “a/r/tographers live and work in the spaces of dynamic currere” (p. 7). A/r/tography is an active practice, moving beyond the written word (Irwin, 2006). Obviously, there are many possible approaches to curriculum. Pedagogy. If curriculum refers mainly to content, pedagogy is more about how the learning content is delivered. Aoki (2004b) defines pedagogy literally, as “leading children” (p. 191), or the practice of teaching. While different subjects may require various pedagogical approaches, effective home economics teaching involves building relationships with students (Brown, 1980; East, 1980; Simpson, 1973/1995; Vaines, 1997a, 1997b). A teacher’s mode of practice will affect the way that they approach curriculum and pedagogy (Vaines, 1997a, 1997b). Public pedagogy is increasingly relevant to home economics education, since many learning experiences take place outside of the classroom (O'Malley, Sandlin & Burdick, 2010). Since NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 87 home economics is the study of everyday life, it follows that not all learning experiences will take place at school. A pedagogy of self. I used to see curriculum and pedagogy as terms that related to students rather than to teachers. As a teacher, it was my responsibility to deliver the curriculum to my students, and pedagogy referred to how I did so. Irwin’s (2006) concept of pedagogy of self helped broaden my point of view. According to Irwin (2006), “Educators usually focus their care on others; yet if they wish to truly care for others, it is vitally important for them to care for themselves first” (p. 75). She encourages teachers to be attentive to their own needs and to use liminal spaces “to nurture an aesthetic and spiritual currere” (p. 75). The painting shown in Figure 26 represents such a space. Figure 26. Self-Portrait as Art Teacher. Acrylic on Masonite board. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 88 I made this painting at the end of my first year of teaching art, in the liminal space between teaching and summer holidays. There was a lot of cleaning and organizing to be done in my classroom before the break, and some students had come to help out. As we sorted through paint trays, we found a lot of leftover paint that was still usable, but not clean enough to go back into the original containers. Rather than discarding it all, we spread out the trays and had a paint party with the leftovers. Our colour choices were limited, but this limitation forced us to be creative. While at first I felt guilty about taking a break when there was so much to do, our paint party not only allowed us to reduce waste, but provided us an energetic boost, so we were more productive afterwards. Irwin (2006) emphasizes the importance of creative acts: Creating works of art allows artists to re-see their experience, to perceive their experience again. The importance of artistic activity rests in the attempts we make to create. The more we create, the more we see. The more we see, the more we appreciate and understand. (p. 79) Looking at this painting brings back the memory of that day: the feeling of having finished a year of teaching, and the sense of communitas in the art room as we all worked together. The apron strap, a small detail, has significance to me because it represents embodied knowing. Wearing my apron means I’m about to do something. Even now, when I put on an apron in class, my students know that something special is about to happen. This painting reminds me to step back from life’s busy-ness from time to time, to carve out some liminal space, and to be creative. Developing a liminal pedagogy. Learning about liminal space has helped change my classroom practices. I am working on being more process than product-oriented, attending to the moments in which learning takes place. While tight timelines always seem to be an issue in the classroom, I’ve found that if I rush through rather than giving topics the proper attention NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 89 necessary, I am not saving any time. While we might move on to the next concept, my students may be left with incomplete understanding of the subject. Instead, I think that attending to the liminal learning spaces - paying more attention to being in the moment and really seeing how students learn - is important for making progress. Classroom dynamics are constantly changing, even from day to day. According to Conroy and de Ruyter (2009), “a fundamental feature of liminality is its lack of fixity or permanence; it is not and cannot be a fixed space, a fixed point or a fixed set of processes because things are liminal with respect to other things” (p. 5). What works in my class with one group of students may not work with the next. Conroy and de Ruyter (2009) provide examples of characteristics that a liminal teacher may possess: A liminal teacher is willing to change when needed. They are not limited by their current position, but are willing to look beyond where they are, and are open to and continually searching for “new and better ideas/practices/formulations whether they be within or beyond [their] position” (p. 7). The liminal teacher will explore new pedagogies, and does not shy away from addressing emotional issues and controversial topics in the classroom. The classroom is a place for spiritual, as well as intellectual growth, and adopting a liminal pedagogy can help foster communitas, which nurtures students on a personal level (Conroy & de Ruyter, 2009; Madsen Ankeny & Maruggi, 2016). According to Conroy and de Ruyter (2009), “The teacher who wishes to be more than a technician must try to keep open the liminal spaces” (p. 7). I will continue working to develop the characteristics of a liminal teacher. Threshold Concepts Lead to Transformation Transformational teaching must include student mastery of course concepts and enhanced learning skills, as well as promoting positive attitudes towards learning (Slavich & Zimbardo, 2012). I’ve often struggled with the question of how to simultaneously teach for transformation NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 90 and cover the curriculum (Gravett, 2004), and many of my lessons do not include all of the transformational components. I often try new things and make mistakes, following which I am tempted to go back to more straightforward methods. Accepting my own mistakes is not in my comfort zone, but I’ve learned that having a growth mindset will take me farther than playing it safe within my familiar skill set (Dweck, 2006). Slavich and Zimbardo explain that “student success is...influenced by the beliefs that teachers hold about their own capabilities” (2012, p. 578), so I must lead by example. According to Christensen and Aldridge (2013), “transformational teaching is not possible for teachers who have not been personally transformed” (p. 78). Since before HEEL, I have experienced many changes in my professional practice, and change is the key indicator of transformation (Scorgie, 2010). I can relate to McGregor’s (2004) transformative journey, since she, too, was in a comfortable place, and may not have changed if she hadn’t been shaken out. She says that she would not go back to how she was, and I feel the same way. The events that disrupted my comfort zone have led to rich learning opportunities. Now that I have gained deeper insights into teaching, I find that I am more excited about the overall opportunity of teaching rather than teaching a specific subject, although I do anticipate finding more ways to incorporate home economics into my curriculum. While I do not profess to be completely transformed (not that we can ever be), I have experienced deep changes in my practice and in my attitude towards teaching. There are still days I feel like I’m pushing to get through, but I’m more likely to reflect upon my experiences in order to learn from them. This reflection has allowed me to move past the “just a grade 5 teacher” view (Cohen, 1997). Whereas I once saw my position as a demotion, I now see it as an opportunity to permeate deeper meaning into my teaching. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 91 As I contemplate the journey that has led me to this point, I can see the transformation in my own pedagogy. Where in previous health classes I would teach students how to use Canada’s Food Guide to plan a menu, we now also look at the origins of foods and examine environmental and social issues related to them. When we sew T-shirt pillows, instead of the main focus being on how to do a perfect blanket stitch, we discuss the advantages of repurposing clothing and recycling. Even the end-of-the-year treat day became an opportunity for reflection when we discussed how lucky we are not only to have access to good food, but for the chance to share it with friends. I now have many ways to show connections between class teaching and everyday life situations, helping students appreciate the concept of ‘world as home’ (Vaines, 1997a, 1997b). Figure 27 is a visual representation of my transformative learning journey, which began before HEEL and continued throughout my graduate studies. As illustrated in the banner at the bottom of the illustration, my learning journey will continue. The home economics threshold concepts that I have identified: everyday life, ecological perspective/world as home, community and interdisciplinarity, will continue to shape the way that I teach. According to Wood (2012), the liminal state itself can be described as a threshold state, which implies that within it, transformation occurs. After passing through, I believe that I have truly been transformed. Embracing Authentic Research Interpretive inquiry. While I was initially hesitant to embark on an interpretive research project, I now see that completing this self-study has allowed me to see myself in a different light: to truly see myself as a teacher. My research has helped me become a more confident teacher. Learning about home economics through various lenses has allowed me to see the possibilities that exist for it to be taught across the curriculum. My exploration of liminal space has shown me that it is an ever-changing space, which holds many rich learning opportunities. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 92 Figure 27. HEEL Map. Coloured pencil on paper. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 93 These last few years have not been easy, but they have opened my eyes to the possibilities that exist within my teaching practice. My view of pedagogy is much more wholistic, and I look for ways to infuse home economics teachings across the curriculum. By adjusting the lens through which I view my own experiences as a teacher/student within the school community and seeing the tensions as places of growth rather than obstacles to be overcome, I have experienced more personal growth than if I simply attempted to avoid the tension. Journaling. My notes include situations from both my professional and personal lives, since the two are intertwined. Since I am both subject and researcher, reviewing my field texts gave me the opportunity to relive experiences through a variety of times, social situations, and places. Keeping a journal was a challenge; in the midst of teaching, there is not time to sit and write. I would often have to wait until the end of the day to record my observations. Flashes of insight would sometimes come at odd times, when a specific event would help me connect previously unrelated ideas. My journal also contains reflections about the experience of starting over, and existing in liminal space. As I have documented the transformation that I have experienced moving from being a high school art teacher to an elementary school teacher to being a teacher of home economics, one of my key realizations is that these roles do not have to be mutually exclusive: rather than being either/or, I can be and. Art. Art has always been an important part of my life, so using an a/r/tographic method fits well with my ideas. I often visualize what I am trying to say. Capturing my ideas in photographs allowed me to capture ideas in a different way than just writing about them. My photographs would not make it into any professional galleries, and I’m not sure I was fully following the prescribed stages of Miksang photography, but I found the process to be useful in NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 94 documenting my experiences. Studying my photos often brought to light features I had not noticed previously. I was also pleased to see how my paintings, drawings, and collages helped express my ideas. I had always learned that art was separate from academics, and this process has renewed my confidence in myself as an artist and as a teacher. Final Thoughts “Life is what happens to us while we are making other plans.” –Allen Saunders I have always related to Allen Saunders’s saying about life happening while we are making other plans. In the last few years, I have experienced events that I could never have anticipated, let alone have planned for. This seems to be the way it goes with teaching. A plan on paper does not always translate well to the actual lived reality of a classroom. In order to be a successful teacher, I must be flexible and adaptable, fitting my plans to the situation, instead of the other way around. Through my learning journey, I have gained a renewed appreciation for teaching, and have learned to have more faith in my own abilities, experiencing transformation on both personal and professional levels. I have come to appreciate the importance of examining and adjusting my practice, not just going along with the status quo. I will conclude by briefly answering three questions posed by Vaines (1997a) to help guide home economics professionals towards becoming Reflective Practitioners:  Who am I? I am an artist who enjoys creating visual interpretations of my experiences, a researcher who is constantly seeking ways of improvement, and a teacher who endeavours to teach authentically.  What are my gifts? My gifts are creativity, connecting with others, and a passion for teaching and learning. I have finally come to appreciate these strengths. NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 95  What is my calling? Whereas I used to see teaching as my job, I now see it as my calling. I am not a teacher of one single subject, but I see my role more wholistically, as I teach for everyday life, helping people understand and appreciate all that our world has to offer. Passing through this liminal space may be the conclusion of one learning journey, but I’m sure I will soon find myself within another liminal learning space. I now understand the significance of liminal space to learning – it is in that in-between place where real learning possibilities exist. Just as the liminal space has been instrumental in shaping my own learning experience, I can also use what I have learned from within it to help my own students persist through their learning journeys. I look forward to the possibilities that lie before me. 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If the metaphor the WORLD IS OUR HOME is the foundation of Reflective Practice, what are all the ways in which this is expressed in the language, research and practice of HE? If the metaphor the WORLD IS OUR HOME is the foundation of Reflective Practice, how do I incorporate this idea into my own teaching practice, through teaching subjects other than home economics? 2. Are there situations where you have seen reflective practice at work or have you ever used reflective practice? Talk it over with a colleague. Am I aware of reflective practice being used around me? 3. What are all the ways in which HE and Reflective Practice are interrelated? Why is there a good fit between the philosophies of HE & RP? How can I incorporate HE and RP philosophies into my daily practice? 4. In what ways is the Mission of HE carried out through your Reflective Practice? Am I carrying out the Mission of HE through my pedagogical practices? (Vaines, 1997a, pp.13-14) NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 109 Appendix B Nelson’s questions for an ecological approach to teaching 1. Are my plans based on decisions my students are presently encountering, or on problems which they will need to solve in the future? 2. What opportunities do [I] provide for students to gather a broad information, concept and principle base which will enable them to consider and choose from a number of alternative pathways? 3. [Am I] providing learning experiences in which students are asked to monitor the effects of the decisions they are making on themselves, on their family and on their environments? 4. Do [I] place [my] students into simulated or real life situations where they must decide, act and react to ever-changing environments which they will encounter in the future and where adaptation and flexibility must be demonstrated? (Nelson, 1979/1995, pp. 184-187) NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 110 Appendix C Lesson Plan Remodelling: The Remodelling Process 1. A description of the standard approach  the content and how it is traditionally taught 2. A critique  why it fails to foster the goals of global education  suggest what needs to be added or changed to raise global issues, to motivate practical reasoning and student action 3. The objectives of the remodelled plan For example:  students will become aware of the interconnected and interrelated nature of the world  students will become more skilled at being conceptually clear, and in defining problems  students will have the opportunity to confront racism, prejudice, stereotyping, discrimination, scapegoating, and bias in articles, texts, television, film, case studies, etc.  students will learn analytic skills to critically examine the root causes of global issues and problems  students will achieve a sense of multicultural understanding through a positive emphasis on similarities in belief systems, customs, and personal experiences  students will learn strategies that could be used in dealing with conflict NAVIGATING LIMINAL SPACE 111  students will be able to outline alternative solutions and consider the various consequences to themselves and others  students will reflect on actions taken 4. A description of the remodelled plan 5. Transformation to practical reasoning mode  outline a practical problem as a value question  list possible sub-problems (Smith, 2004, pp. 3-4)
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Navigating liminal space : my journey towards becoming a home economics teacher
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