"CONTENTdm"@en . "http://resolve.library.ubc.ca/cgi-bin/catsearch?bid=1211252"@en . "University Publications"@en . "2016-01-18"@en . "1954-02-18"@en . "Misprinted volume, should be XXXVI."@en . ""@en . "https://open.library.ubc.ca/collections/Ubysseynews/items/1.0123788/source.json"@en . "application/pdf"@en . " vM-^lA\nADULT\nENTERTAIN-\nMENT\nL\nYSSEY\n'Non Illigitimo. Carborundum\"\nm\nENGINEERS'\nISSUE\nVOLUME XXXHUIHEXII\nReas\nCoast\nBacchus\nBacks\nBrawl\nThis year's episode of the Engineer's Ball will be dedicated\nto the Greek and Roman God of\nWine. For this reason it will\nbe remembered by all posterity\nas the RED BACCHANAL.\nRevelry will be carried on\nfor two nights (the 24th and the\n25th of February) and all participants will have something to\ntell their grandchildren (and\nprobably several things not to\ntell them.)\nOur Patron Saint Lady Go-\ndiva will watch over the festivities from her lofty perch on the\nwinged horse Pegassus. (bor-\nrosved especially for thf occasion1 and will expect all Engineers to live up to their reputations, that is, show the rest\n\u00E2\u0080\u00A2ot the campus how ,i Ball should\nbe run.\nThe first invocation will commence at 9 o'clock: by 1:_0. those\nwho have not already succumbed to the power of Morpheus\nwill move on to other fields.\nThis will be a couple of nights\nto remember. So don't forget\nyou've got a date \u00E2\u0080\u0094 for the\nEngineer's Ball and a night with\nBacchus.\nANCOUVER, B.C., THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 18, 1954\nPrice 5c: No. 33\nProve that Our Pacific\nHell\nBlotz, Dufton and friend\ncelebrate addition of famous Royal Roads' cannon\nto collection of EUS trophies;\nMather's Nightcap\nBy BARRY MATHER\nWhy I didn't write this\u00E2\u0080\u0094\nWas going to write some\nlittle thing for here but decided\nnot to do it \u00E2\u0080\u0094 I saw what\nhappened to the Home Economics (firis . . . They wrote some\nlittle things for here and about\none half of them were thrown\nout as being neither homey\nnor economical. Not good\nenough, was the harsh phrase\nused. I think.\nIf 10 Home Ee girls are not\ngood enough to make this grade\nwhat chance has one Alma Ma-\nfi-her'.' (Engineering problem),\ncan see my article here\nProof that the vaunted Pacific Coast defences are pracrrcally\nuseless was shown Saturday night when a group of UBC Engineers\nbroke into Royal Roads Tri-Services College near Victoria and \"borrowed\" a 400-pound cannon.\nThe cannon, representing all the tradition which Royal Roads is based on. now rests safely i\nin the Engineering common room. j\nThe cream of Canada's future military le aders slept soundly while four Enineers, the!\n\"scum of the earth\", according to our estimable Ubyssey, pulled one of the bravest coups in J\nthe history of Canadian university life. i\nThe Engineers (not \"Applied Science students\". Mr. Foth- j\neringham) left Vancouver Saturday afternoon by RED Ball\nferry. They reached Royal Roads College, termed the finest j\nmilitary academy in the country, early Sunday morning.\nWhile the future officers of the Canadian Army, Air Force;\n|and Navy, snored in their bunks, FOITR Redshirts boldly walked i\n| past armed guards, ripped the beautifully polished brass cannon!\n| from its mountings, and spirited it over the fence of CANADA'S\n! TRAINING GROUND FOR DEFENDERS OF OUR DEMOCRACY.\nBefore the Engineers audaciously'carted their trophy past the\nDriscoll\nWins By\n12 Votes\n| by MICHAEL AMES '\nUbyssey Election Reporter\n< Two of the closest election bat*\nj ties in AMS election history\n; highlighted the election of\n| second slate officers Wednesday.\nWinners of slate two are Ro\nbert Bray, Law 1, treasurer: Ron\n'Longstaffe. Arts 2, first member-\nat-large; Diane Driscoll, Phys Ed.\n3, president Women's Undergraduate Society: Robt Brady. Com-\n, meree 3. president Men's Athletic Directorate.\nDiane Driscoll nosed out opponent Kay Salter for president\nof Women's Undergraduate Society by an all-lime low of two\nvotes.\nDriscoll polled 284, while Sailer, who picked up ;hree hallo''}\noy the recount, polled 282\nroads with filthv oil smear?\nThe bumD-oroviding, roughton-\nridinu.\nHIGHWAY ENGINEER.\nWho is the man designs our\nDumps with judgment, skill RCMP station down the road, they also removed a shabby sign\nand dare'.' designating Roval Roads as the proving mound for Mr. St. Lau-\nWho is the man that\" builds rcnt,iliv brass \"\nthem and keeps them in re- --.,,\" , . \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 t. ,,D~ ., , , . j .\n,,;,,,\u00E2\u0080\u00A2< , The lowly proletariat trom UBC. with shabby red sweaters\nWho has to shut them down be- in place of the braid and brass button* which usually decorate\ncause the valve seats clisap the hallowed ground of Royal Roads, were never in danger of i\ndetection as they lingered long enough to \"borrow\" the specially\nWosks \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\n>rd to get\nstudent of Ei\nI\n'lOW .\n(Big White Space Savin*.\nThis Big Wh.te Spae,-\nReserved for\nBoys \u00E2\u0080\u0094 1 cannot affc\ntin-own out of here\n[< might be catching\nSo I will write nothm- mv-\n;;;Vn\" lenci\u00C2\u00B0^\u00C2\u00AB n>tie,h.ng\n;lt *\u00C2\u00AB\u00C2\u00BB at.om. time wr.ten\n'\u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0> a university\ngmeering.\n'< '* stiU p,vtty W000i\nTHE ENGINEER\nVV,ii'-,nS;^n,an wh\u00C2\u00B0'\u00C2\u00BBclrawa\n\"re' ' ove\"-\u00C2\u00BB'h>g you de-\nKr\u00C2\u00BB'\u00C2\u00BB \u00C2\u00BB fans-Atlantic liner to ,\n. \u00E2\u0084\u00A2. made o, \u00E2\u0080\u009E-(\u00E2\u0080\u009E,.' l0'<\nu '.. \"V,d \u00E2\u0080\u00A2inds\" \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0080\u00A2'\u00C2\u00BB\u00E2\u0080\u00A2\u00C2\u00AB\u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0-\n'V ;il,d \"buls\" t\u00E2\u0080\u009E make Ins\nt meauuiB clear\"\n''ll!' u'ork-disd.iiinno .,.,. ,.,..\nhlUlilU!\nconsim.tinc; kxgineei:.\n^ !l\" luilld.s a !M ;,i |,..- |.|( v\n> oars, thai d:-o :>' >\u00E2\u0080\u00A2\u00E2\u0080\u00A2.\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 \"- .\" : u n\nI'hei: ch.iliL'i - h' \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 \u00E2\u0096\u00A0:''\u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 :' \"\nDra r.\nThe beariua-wearing. gearing- ..... , \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 ..\ntearing titled canv'as cover tor the cannon.\nMB'CHANICAL ENGINEER <~*lu' Scienceman, ignoring the warnings of his mates, slipped\nWho maks his iuice tor half a right up to the window of CANADA'S WEST POINT and chalked\ncent and wants to charge a on the glass, in lurid red ink, BARL' WAS HERE.\"\nd i in e \" ______^^___________________^__^______^_____________\nWho. when we've signed the-\ncontract can't deliver halt\nthe tins'.'\nWho thinks a loss of twenty\nDercent is nothing queer'.'\nThe volt-inducing, load - reducing\nELECTRICAL ENGINEER\nWho is it. that takes a transit\nout to find a sewer to tap\"\nWho then wih care extreme\nlocates the junction on the\nman'.'\nWho is it that goes to dig it up\nand finds it nowhere near\"\nThe mud >- besnotled. torn-avid-\nlatt.ered.\nCIVIL ENGINEER\nWho thinks without his pro\nducts we would all be in the\nlurch\"\nWho has a heathen ;dol which\nhe designates. Research\"\"\nWho tints the creeks, perfuines\nIhe air. and makes the Innd-\nscane drear'.'\nThe odour-evolving, grass dis\nm>1\ inc.\n(\u00E2\u0096\u00A0]it.'aik\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 \i t.'\c\"infer\nA GOOD EVENING to even,\nENGINEERS BLEED INCOGNITO\nContrary to erroneous reports iifuv. Blood Drive Officials.\nEngineers gushed .gallons in the recent U.B.C. blood drive to\nlead all other groups on the campu>. The faulty tabulation was\ndue in part to the big-hearted Redshirts who bled under bogus\nnames for the un inspired Comniercemen The Commerce Boys\nare holding back until 'ike price is right. Several gallon... trom\nEngineers were rejected because of high alcohol content.\nThe Engineer's valiant response lo the drive inspired Forestry\nand Pharmacy to end up near the top Nurses bled well but the\nHome Ec girls just wouldn't come across\nThe final tabulation, which shouldn't\nfor reasons already stated, are a> follows\nbe ia'.-\n:i Wo serious\nForestry\n100' ,\nH\nNurses\n!-1(J '\nT,\nCom men e\nas 4\n..,'\nAnplied Scie'Vt\n76\nA\nPharmac.\nlift\ny-\nA urn\n6 7\n>.\nArcane,-: s\n11: '\n-\nAl\nvr;\no Ran\n48 '.'\n4ti\n44 '\n42 '\noh\ni.oo\ ani'l\nto un;ve\n'M--\n.1\nIII\nFour candidates have so fa*\nposted their names in the final\nAMS election slate, to be elect\u00C2\u00BBi\nFebruary 24. *\nGerrv Hodge. Applied Science\n1. is running for vice-president.\nValerie Haig-Brown, Arts 1,\nand Donald Jabour. Arts 2. aro\ncompeting for second member at\nlarge.\nJerome Angel, Commerce 3,\nis nominated for coordinator of\nactivities.\nNominations deadline is 4 p.wu\ntoday.\n~\u00E2\u0080\u0094mm*mmmmmmmmmmm*^mmmmmmmm\u00E2\u0080\u0094mm\u00E2\u0080\u0094**\n'tween ctosses\nHalprin Conducts\nArt Gallery Tour\nSTUDENT CHRISTIAN Monument presents Dr. A. M. Trendell\nspeaking on \"I Raise a Family\",\nthe final lecture in his \"Love and\nMarriage\" series, noon today in\nArts 106.\nH* H* \u00C2\u00A5\nUNITED NATIONS' Club pr*-\n, si'iits Ron Landau, expert on Slr>-\n, roeean Affairs, .speaking on \"T-.vt\ni Crisis in Morocco\", noon todaj,\nPhysics 201.\n%. )f. }{\u00E2\u0080\u00A2\nCHRISTIAN SCIENCE ORGANIZATION are holding a ir-:-\nHire entitled \"Christian Science:\nthe goal of scientific knowledge \",\nnoon today in Physics 200\nif. >f. )f.\nART GALLERY EXHIBITION\nof Architectural Design will o^\nheld in the Art Gallery today at\n1 p.m. Lawrence Ilalprm. a:i\noutstanding landscape architect\nof San Francisco will conduct\nthe tour. Mr Halprin will speak\nFriday noon m Phvsics 200\nPHYSICAL EDUCATION L \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\ndergraduate Society will iH'i'M\"''\nils annual physical education do--\nplus Friday noon and again F:\"-\nd,i.\ night in the War 'Mom >:,.\u00E2\u0096\u00A0;.\nGym. Admission is 2'.\u00E2\u0080\u00A2 o Io\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\nui-m :- and .')iii- tor adu1.:.--\n'Continuod on Page Fouv'\nS..-o CLASSES' Ill \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 B flsif\nMEMBER,' CANADIAN UNIVBR-UTY PRESS -\nAuthorized as seconie important event coming.-and thai is\ntiie E.U.S. elect ton.-,. A lot of people are cnntt'i\t to sit\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0back und let others direct their activities. Only by entering\ninto student affairs and working for tho student body can\nyou gain the full benefit of university life. There is a lot\noi satisfaction in student offices and, being strictly mercenary, the training you receive is an asset when you seek\nemployment. Prospective employers look for students who\nnot only are engineers but also take an active part in administration and organization of life. I urge you seriously\nto consider running for an E.U.S. office or failing thai, to\nassist in the organization of E.U.S. activities.\nWe have the reputation of being the most active and\nunited group on the campus and individually we must keep\nthis reputation alive by sharing in the Ball, the Slipstick,\nand all our escapades.\nGood luck to all of you, will see you at the Ball.\nDAVE DUFTON,\nPresident E.U.S.\nThe iHummefi)\n\u00E2\u0080\u0094 by jabez\nBecause I gained some reputation for libertinage when\nI was writing for this paper as an undergraduate, it has\nbecome traditional for the Engineers to ask mo to contribute\nto their issue of the paper, as a demonstration of how far\npornography has progressed in the last 15 years. It is a sort\nol \"Before\" in\d \"After\" business, with my effort representing \"Before\" Kinsey and the discovery of Supersex.\nWe all have our purpose in this world, and I am content\nto look quaint to the undergraduate of 1954. Especially\nsince 1 am .secretly convinced lhal I'm not really quaint af\nail. I am in my prime, as every man is from the age of 1>0\nto S.V A man's college days are numbered (1, 2. H. 4, ele.),\nout his prime goeS on right up lo the day of the funeral.\n! am therelore, glad to accept the Engineers' invitation\nlo do my old clog dance in the middle ot lour pages oi bur-\n;e-que hi imps cpui grind.-..\nI oiiiv wish I knew; a few jokes thai were I'll lo he printed\nhi tin- paper, hut the only jokes 1 can think of arc clean.\nAhmil all 1 can do is urge the Engineers to give blood.\n:\u00E2\u0080\u00A2'!' those whose live-, depend on it. Never mind giving it fo\nthe Red (.'toss, ,Iusl send it direct to me, e o The Vancouver\nP1evince\n(1 -Iioiiitl also like |o remind artsmen ot the meeting\n:: Brock Hall. S p.m.. February ,\"\u00E2\u0080\u00A2<). to discu.s.s the turther-\n. ce \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 c world peace ny dropping some marbles :v.['- \"ne\n. :'m\"-:;v s ;,[ ..ii -masher I-Mease l>r;nu vuiu own '.\u00E2\u0080\u00A2::.\u00E2\u0096\u00A0.'\">..'- <\n**>war vmm&wtov\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0\".^ThvffOdMyi * February \"T8,\"IB8*\nBLOTZ\nSpirit Is Intangible\nBlotz says:\nWhat's happened to the \"Engineering Spirit at UBC?\u00E2\u0080\u0094the\nintangible spirit, not the liquid.\nThis year we've seemingly been\nquite content to sit back and\n\"let George do it,\" only for\nGeorge we substitute the name\nof any suitable member of the\nEUS executive. Remember fellows, nve elected them to'lead\nus \u00E2\u0080\u0094 not to do everything for\nus. Have a look at a couple of\nEUS activities this year which\nhave received a pitiful lack of\nsupport:\nThe proposed AMS budget for\nEngineering Clubs. Did you\nknow that we lost that extra\nmoney by less than 20 votes?\nIn other words, if just 20 more\nEngineers had taken time off\nfrom listening to the World\nSeries, we could all have enjoyed better activities all year.\nThe frosh orientation. Yes,\nlot of us did get out and help and\na lot.more had \"suggestions\"\nfor next year, but not enough\nof us were willing to accept\nand follow the lead of the students we< elected to lead us.\nOur executive planned and acted in what they thought werf1\niM\nour best interests, and explained the olan beforehand. No\nbeefs were heard\u00E2\u0080\u0094and so they\nwent ahead,\nThere have been other back-\nbreaJsing (and time-consuming,\ntherefore, mark-reducing) efforts made by our executive,\nand in many cases they not only\nhad to lead us. but they had\nto drag us by the hand.\nBut don't take it too hard.\nWe've done a good job also.\non several occasions. For in-\ntance, the March of Dimes \u00E2\u0080\u0094\nWe got behind th'at effort and\nraked in $562, even more than\nlast year. We helped ourselves\nin a big way with th ? Homecoming, and last fall's Engineers' \u00E2\u0080\u0094 Nurses' Mixer was\namong the very best. So we\ncan do it, if we try. Let's see\na little more try, and let's dig\nin and help ourselves by aiding the executive physically\nand in spirit \u00E2\u0080\u0094 let's make the\nRed Bacchanal (the Engineers'\nBall1 the huge success it should\nbe, and then let's continue and\nfinish off this year so that once\nagain the UBC Engineers will\nbe \"UBC's best.\"\nWho are we? \u00E2\u0080\u0094 Engineers ! S\nEngineers Not Dead Fish But\nHave Drive Plus Enthusiasm\nA writer in the student paper\nof the University of Manitoba\neulogizes 4,he energ>. drive and\nen ! In i -i;mm i e| the i ngn i. -er; n u\nundergradi ial. \u00E2\u0096\u00A0- ol a :;n iei ,i! loo\nago and complains Ih ol lim-o\not toda\ are chad fish.\"\nThere are no dead fish in the\nH);*>:U4 Engineering Undergraduate Society of I'BC. This\nyear's March ol Dimes campaign alone is the proof. Seldom, it' ever, has more efficient\nleadership, organization and\nteam work been displayd on\nthe campus. The fast-moving\nnoon-hour show provided the\nspectators with most enjoyable\nentertainment. No wonder the\ncampaign was an outstanding\nfinancial success,\nThe success of this and the\nblood drive campaign and the\nefficiency with which the objectives were achieved should\nmore than offset the barrage\nof adverse publicity following\nthe EUS Smoker.\nUnder the leadership of Dav\u00C2\u00AB\nDufton, we now look forward\nwitIT anticipation to the remaining events of the year, especially the ball and the publication\nof the Slipstick.\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0V. MUIH.\nHon. President\nStephens, Small Staff\nTo Complete Slipstick\nThat's the Engineer'- yearbook. \"The Slip-tick\". The\nfourth animal edition of said 'nook, under the direction oi.\nHerb Stephens and made possible by a small staff ot Engineers, is now Hearing completion. This annual is produced,\nspecifically tor Engineers and is designed to cover all phases\nof Engineering-both on and oil the campus. The Slipstick\ncontains photos and a short rundown on the year's activities,\nindividual pictures of Third and Fourth Year Engineer.-.,\naction photos of the Ball and Models, etc., PLUS a few\ncartoons by \"MacK\", something not even the regular\nUbyssey can boast.\nThe book is an invaluable asset to First and Second\nYear Engineers. Why? Because it contains information\nwhich cannot readily be obtained elsewhere. This intorma-\ntion concerns their future and is found in the many articles\n.submitted by various departmental Profs.\nTo the Third and Fourth-Year Engineers, all is not\nlost: tt is a ready-made diary, which 25 years from now.\nwill bring back memories, fond or otherwise, of clays spent\nat U.B.C.\nAgain this year, the fact that the annual must be <\u00E2\u0080\u00A2\nyear is a deciding factor. However, the price of the \"Slip-\nstick\" this year is remaining the same-\u00E2\u0080\u0094Si.75. To ensure\nnext year's annual, support this year's annual; order a n4\nSlipstick now from your class president or al any noon-hour\nil) the E.U.S. office. Room 206. .\n/' f\ P. 'r ,'.< \u00E2\u0080\u009Ef \\nBelt lfcvfl*d\u00C2\u00AB_'rP\u00C2\u00ABkrfaw^48,19S4\nmM_g_J_Bia_l_^\nTM1 VBtSfEf\nPage Time\nBy LARRY BUTLER\nI have been queried of late by\nseveral younger members\nof the Engineering Faculty as to why it is necessary to have a pep meet\nprior to the Ball. Instead\nof answering their question, I\nthought it best to teach them\nself - assurance by allowing\nthem to supply their own answer. It is very saddening to\nreport that not one of them\ncould do this correctly.\nTo the' very last man. the\nanswer was, \"To encourage\nEngineers to attend the Engineers' Ball.\" This answer is\nincorrect, since it is not necessary to coerce Engineers to attend the Ball. There are not\nenough tickets to go around as\nit is. Here are the facts:\nJust before the big war. At\nthat time a letter was receiv-\nPanic\nStrikes\nMedics\nPan ie stricken medicos an- in\na ]ii;:|-:dr\ What did it. is the\n1 mimiio-: ciiie.-'.lon asked in th.\n,\u00E2\u0096\u00A0: -.: i, (\u00E2\u0096\u00A0' ' i;: l ol llie-ie sacn-t.\n. -oi, - W;'\ ' Wh>. ' WI..'. '\nAt I'ce Vancouver (ieiu-ra!\nHo-|>:!ai las' week a woman 'A as\n; '.isiiefl into Maternity, literally\n;\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 nd figuratively. She was\nj.und to be in desperate need\nit a blood transfusion which was\nrapidly administered with no\nmalice of forethought. Ten hours\nlater she was delivered of a\nbouncing baby boy. On first\nsight the babe appeared a little\ncueer. On closer inspection his\nupper extremities and thoracic\nexpanse appeared a vivid red\nA'ith the exception of two prominent white stripes on his upper\nleft arm.\nAt St Paul's Hosiptal in the\n.'..ame week an unfortunate logger was treated for multiple\ntract u oes which included the\nfirms, back and legs. Since he\nwas in a state of extreme shock,\n?, transfusion of blood was ad-\niv.mistered. On completion of\nIhe transfusion, he lept from his\nted hiccoughing loudly and staggered down the hall, singing\nlewd songs about a lady named\n\"Codiva.\"\nA ivoorl trom Pence Coupe\n'\u00E2\u0080\u00A2il'ivini'd Medical Circles of a\n!\u00E2\u0080\u00A2\".range bul interesting case in\n.inch a child of three weeks.\n; Itermg from blood shot eyes.\n'. on ved a needed I ransfUsion.\nreeo\'er.v from this dread\nit'hc'.ion. so well known by\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0' n: \ ei'si! y .-: ndenls. i lie child re\n. -Mi am I min of iinurishmeiit\n:;' null; wilh a large head i.l\n.-;<-.. and la! or deg( nerated to\n- \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0''< o -',,:.\u00E2\u0080\u00A2 ' iu;' ii w mild Inlet'\n'. -.\"'': \" i c : .11! I >e oi fort\ : imes\n'-. i \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 o |. \u00E2\u0096\u00A0-.- t. i s:n !' lesi \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 i u'ci I r \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\n. - '. io \. \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 i ih igg. (i tlii' -. 'len I i 1 '.c\n; '\u00E2\u0096\u00A0- ..i' 'lie l-aidocrinoleg.-.!.-.\n* l '..\u00E2\u0096\u00A0!,, i :> I.ode,-.; ,1- ;md III\ne ' h. v. . I. de niedica ! prol'es\n: \"c... ., traulic tre'.i.'y ot\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 - i . I'eli I\": .e\ have made I i; 1-\n.k'.. ; : I. ng d 'see verv ,,li t hrei,-\n', \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 - > ; io 1 lent - to ce V ed i >'.o. -d\no ' i \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0' . e Ill-M . ne', \>i' \" i.a d\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 ,. \u00E2\u0096\u00A0.,.;':', !\u00E2\u0096\u00A0' I ' S\ned by the President of the\nE.U.S. from a frustrated member of the I Felta Thigh Sorority (better known now as\nthe S.C.M.) This girl bewailed and berated the members\nof the E.U.S. as being, as she\nput it \u00E2\u0080\u0094 sexless. This poor\nwretch Ai creature claimed\nthat after being.in the company of an engineer for one\nwhole evening, she still remained very, very chaste, both\nmentally and physically, and\nwhat was the E.U.S. going to\ndo about it. Casting aside the\nobvious answer, at least for\nthe time being, a committee\nwas formed to study the problem thoroughly. Upon investigation, it was found that the\naccused engineer was a mechanical. Most of the committee\nwere willing to throw in the\ntowel at this point, but one\npersistent and obnoxious first\nyear Engineering type who\nhad grandiose ambitions of\nmaking the disciplinary committee of the AMS Council\n(his mother had. been boinged\nover the buttocks with a gavel; his\" father was a poor but\nhonest lawyer, or rather an\nhonest, thus poor lawyer) decided to press the issue even\nfarther and perhaps make a\nfew recommndations. After intensive study, the committee\nfinally recommended that all\nmechanical Engineers should\nbe given lessons in Effective\nLoving. It was decided that\nthe lessons should be given\nonce a year in the auditorium,\nthe date being as close as possible to the Engineers' Ball,\nsince it was generally feit that\nmost of them commence to\nclean up a little about that\ntime and there would be less\nlikelihood of greasing up the\nauditorium. This likelihood\nwas not fully realized, however, because most of them\nwere escorting each other to\nthe Ball, and thus they felt\nit was unnecessary to go formal.\nThe first year's experiment\nwas a dismal failure. Not one\nof them coud understand what\nthe lesson was about. The\ncommittee met again and new\nrecommendations were set\nforth. The next year, each\nmechanical would be accompanied by a civil who would\nattempt to illuminate the impenetrable darkness by means\nof a running commentary (in\nwords of no more than two\nsyllables). A smashing success it was, as evident by hundreds of unsolicited testimon\nials of satisfied sorority girls.\nThe committee reformed and\ndecided that the Effective Loving course would be given\neach year and would be open\nto all Engineers.\nThe course is now known\nas Pep Meet to comply with\nschool board regulations, but\nthe course still embodies the\nsame thorough coverage as the\nold Effective Loving course,\nheld as usual in the auditorium, on Monday. February\n22nd. Professor Bob Benson\nwill take the class.\n\"Daddy, how do minks get\nbabies?\"\n\"The same way babes get the\nminks.\"\nTaxi driver to couple in back\nseat: \"Do I take the next turn?''\nVoice: \"Like hell, chum. You\nkeep on driving,''\nBlueprint Offered On Female\nForm: Result Badly Designed\nNew Technique\nPushes Reaction\nPeriod ol Observations: 1921 to 1954\u00E2\u0080\u0094\nINTRODUCTION: --.Many methods may he found in chemistry texts lor making compounds such a.- t.etraethyl. ethyl,\nethyl sulphate, and ethyl acetate. Method- ot preparation of\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0'i'i common chemical have not been win\n'I I'e id' ; lll'X |li ,\u00E2\u0096\u00A0;,., |M ,| , ,; |( \u00E2\u0096\u00A0;, ' ... j||,r ,| | ] \ (\n\" Ml ! .1 \'e ' I- 'il! lie lllok i II ... ' Wi\n\u00E2\u0080\u00A2 ro I'e I: t-'! 11 - iii u ii -t i md;- o| link\n.1 ig ethyl palpil ale. One proces-\ni'i part ion lai is effective, and a\ndescription thereof will be giv- m general, that no reactions oc-\nen: but the operator should first rUr between chemicals that are\nobserve the premliminaries set ,,ot completely pure. In making\n1'\":th below. i ethyl palpitate this fact is ox-\nPRECAUTIONS. --To begin Iremely important, because pure\nwith, the time and place for mak- ethyl will not react, and the more\ning ethyl palpitate should be impure the belter. After these\nwisely chosen. Evenings are the precautions are taken, the most\nbest time, beuause sunlight in- (nmmon procedure is the dissolv-\nhibits the reaction. Week-end ing of ethyl in alcohol (!)0 proof\\nevenings are advisable for two followed by gentle application of\nreasons. One is that the operator heat. To hasten the temperature\npublished and as\niiero tion. alt 'a \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0080\u00A2 1 u i;\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0. \ i ier a -ii, en opera ', i a's c;. n handle\nahno.-t aii.N tiling. l! lias dee;,\nram ol cheiii ica i reactions.\nEDITOR'S NOTE: -The following is a excerpt from\na technical paper presented lo the EUS (Enjoyment of Unlimited Sex) Society by Dr. 1. P. Parabolic. Dr. Parabolis\nis a graduate of Girdle U and is presently employed by ihe\nFoundation Co. of Bulging, Mass.\nExtensive research into the field (bedroom) of the stress- may have to stand by his task rise,'many operators revert to\n... i , \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0080\u00A2 i .\u00E2\u0080\u00A2 i i j un'il the earlv mnrnin\" bonis tn'.hmgle voodooism bv whispering\nstrain relationship existing m the human female form has led mKI1 mt '<'\"> mi>,mn\u00C2\u00AB nouls t0 \" \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 ' . n\n. .. , , . ,, . ,.,.. work on a slow reaction. Th- m;,\u00C2\u00ABlc W()lds ;,lld welld nothings.\nto drastic revision in the present theories concerning the stability ^^ ^^ .^ ^ ^ p.,lpila. So mysterious is ethyl that it of-\nof structures. Although the female is poorly constructed, no t0fj epilvj sometimes needs as tni ''^Ponds to such incanta-\ndecision has been reached as to \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 , , , long as the week-end to settle. tl0ns-\njoints, but it would appear that ,,. ,, A , ...\nwhether this is the fault of the SuK'e ,hl>ro must bt> no KM'rign One of the usual mistakes is\n, , .. in the female form, buttresses are influences such as light, other op- trving to make ethvl palpitate\ndesigner, contractor, or the man H ^ \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 a \"\"\"\" \"\"\u00E2\u0096\u00A0\" i\"\"1 \"'\"'\nincluded to enhance the move- orators and agitation, a secluded too cniicklv. Too much heat mav\nwho tests the finished product. \u00E2\u0080\u009Ei.,\u00E2\u0080\u009E, i, ...i^ i i ,-\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 ,. \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 ' ,\nmerits and improve the angles. Phice should be chosen. (are result in disastrous internal\nThe designer can be held di- pra(.tice. that promising young sllouId b'' laknl llu,t '',h-vl hi,s forces which lead the reaction in\nrectly responsible for the poorly \u00E2\u0080\u009E._ ,....'. ,. m...*..j :T not b<><>11 tampered with on the unpredictable directions. As ;;\nconstructed underpinnings .which\nHowever, il has been found in\nengineers have found the answer\nday preceding the experiment. result of this mistake operator-\nRise And Shine With Joe\niave generally a tendency to bow ' \"*\"\"-'\u00E2\u0096\u00A0- \"\"\" '\"<\u00E2\u0096\u00A0\"'<\u00E2\u0080\u00A2' \"\"\" \"^\u00C2\u00BB\" MATERIALS: -The working have been known to make ethyl\n(lateral deflection). The central i01' Setting around this problem, material i.s usually the most mv ambulate,\nportion of the structure spreads\nwith age and is commonly held HAPPY DAY\nin check hv foundations (misno .\nmen. The reproductive machinery, located in this region, has\nproven uneconomical due to lack\nof use and at the same tune di.s A pa\u00C2\u00A3(e Fj.om Joe Blot_.. Diary ;-mv r,miits of rooll, . oc10ve llp tvom PoKO ,njllii;s notices in\ntorts Ihe shape id the strut lure _ , ., ,u, .,\u00C2\u00BB.., - . .... ^, .\n7 48 l.ouu snores slabbing \ladimir in baeK ,. i,n.s . ]>, i ,- *-, ,\nof tiie -', i'lici urc but fi'iiin an er, the can, f> 08 Victoria Dominion i >h- . \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 ,,\nliK'Kol C/l I a \ el\ngineering viewpoiui isirictl> tiie ; un i').-,-:,.,\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 restored to tang' .-er\ a :oim reports sei-mographa\nni') of sU'ucI lire-i tiie added |mj ,.,'re ,mi p:piii'.: ol di.-:d dislurliance ,i- |\\(, hundred En-\nweigh! is unnecessary. Semi i, r> , ,,\u00E2\u0080\u009E.,.,,: Ul]1 Saiuple indicates ''.meers -uann ou; of the omlri\nperma ne! i; I alsew ork ..- ret| u \"\nplan : l ui ie! mc i u g\n: o mauiia in I ais pari o| the \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 \u00E2\u0096\u00A0; a n\nI lire n proper prom .r; io,:. a: i\n.il'hoiigh Ihe prepiirt ion.. a.'\n-I >:iie\. Ui. 1 e\a ggi ra Inl :'. i. ,i\nheeii I ou ud i I'M' --a ry 1:1 si un\ni a-e- 'a i p!'i)\ ld( la 1-CU'ol'k lo -['.}\nl)i l!\" 1,1 I :eu l I'k a ' id result im; l!\nh 111' p\nI'l 'I\n! lat\n11\ni-i an on I \\ne o;l' ( ' i'.l' ' HIV si :de rule inMI\nl High; hetoi'.\n-- en oni'i-;: 11-..\n>t t -la-nl ef io. .\n( j -vol.\n0 (>2\n'ot'\n: ii in\nir..;,; Co\n'l' SilrlH'i-il\n11111' 11: n i - c : i \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 , i i:;\nei - ' oiii.i'id as t \t\nare delegated\niiall\ne I'nn -i.itt Ui Armouries\nCoutinafrc. cr. Page 4) PfctftffMr\nTHE VEXS SE Y\nThursday, February 18, 1954\nLovettReturns\nFor Hamber Cup\nAlberta To Defend\nCup Monday, Tuesday\nChiefs Snapped\nFor Totem Pics\nUBC Chiefs will have their\npictures taken for the Totem\nat noon today in conjuction with\ntheir game with the Varsity\nsoccer team.\n*v *r* *v\nThe Cricket Club will hold a\npractise in the field house today\nat' 7:30.\nAll you fans can stop screaming about lack of competition\nin Canadian Inter-Collegiate sports. This Monday and\nTuesday, the University of Alberta Qolden Bears will be\nhere to defend the Hamber Cup, emblematic of Western\nCollegiate hockey supremacy.\nThis will give complaining fans\na chance to see how UBC stacks\nup against other than Evergreen\nConference teams\nBATTLE OF BABIES; JV's\nMEET WESTERN JUNIORS\nDick Penn's UBC Jayvees tackle Western Washington Jayvees in an exhibition basketball game at noon today in the War\nMemorial Gym.\nPenn's boys are in good shape and off their last performance\nagainst Eilers should give Western quite a battle. The team it\nat full strength but guard Keith Merrill will see limited actioa\nbecause of his knee injury.\nEngineers Lead\nIn Intramurals\nSCHOLARSHIPS\nAn Engineer Speaks\n- \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 - - -| As might be expected the Engineers are presently holding\n'Birds have been .weakened by ] down first kce in the Intramurals With onlv a few event\nthe loss ot three players due to ... .it-.. 1 * \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\nthe inane eligibility rules but i r\u00C2\u00ABnainjng this year, the Engineers, with an approximate twenty-\nCoach Mitchell has been hearten- Point le\u00C2\u00ABd over their nearest rival, stapd a good chance of reed by the news that star center- claiming the Governor's Cup, emblematic of Intramural su-\n'ice man Eric Lovett will return; premacy.\n' to action for the series. , Tnat the Engineers are in first \u00E2\u0080\u00A2\nNO PREDICTIONS j place is not surprising, however,\nCoach Mitchell is making no I when one considers their oppo-\npredictions other than that if we sition (primarily Artsmen). It is j\ndoubles badminton championship. Again this year, the Engl\nnoer's best bet, they were un-\nOn scanning the records pf the Varsity football and basketball score more goals than Alberta wc : possibly the Engineer's method | ablfi ,0 \"*Peat .tfielr previous rec-\nteams, one -cannot fail to be impressed by the regularity at which wjh win' the much coveted cup. of training that is responsible for\nboth of these teams lose. Each September hope* are raised as to the what Dick does predict howevei their success. The mighty Engin-\n'Birds chances in Evergreen #Conferenee play, and each April an j* that if the students don't sup- eers get in shape by holding\n:tir of disappointment seem.s to prevail because of the continued port this series the athletic bud-: workouts with the men of Mul-\nto take a terrible ligan.\nUnfortunately this type of*\n.training did not meet with pub-\ndismal showing of these two teams. get is going\nThe pooi' showings cannot be blamed upon poor coaching or beatin\u00C2\u00B0.\nupon the innate superiority ot U.S. athletes over their Canadian\nvounlerparls. Indeed, in such spurts as swimming, and tmick and\ni;eld. the Cold and Blue more than holds its own. The poor\nrecords m trie two principal sports can be traced to the tart that\nU.S. colleges are willing and able to pay their athletes\nThis universiU cannot hope to compete against this .-vsiein\not commercialized athletics. BC.'s outstanding high school athlete.-, naturally listen when some big university south ot the\nborder offers a free education. Who wouldn't' U.B.C. lias little\nto offer financially.\nPhys. Ed\nDisplay\nTomorrow\nInstead of their usual Ho Mali\nMali effort the Phys. Ed. Under\nlie approval, so in the future,\nEngineering teams will probably restrict their workouts to\narm-raising exercises iu the\nGeorgia Hotel.\nVOLLEYBALL ACES\nThe Mighty Red Shins, as always, participated strongly in all\nphases of Intramurals. In Volleyball, the Engineers entered eight\nord, aj' they lost a close match to\nthe eventual winners. Jim and\nJohn Pritchard also marie a brilliant showing for the Engineer,\nin the doubles competition.\nThe Men of Science have entered five teams in the Basketball event and at the present\ntime it appears that one of these\nmay have an undefeated season\nin league play.\nTins past Sunday, the Ski meet\nwas held on Grouse Mountain.\nfaced hv Stu McKay, Ab Mercer,\nand Hermann Fink, who place J\nsecond, fourth and fifth, respectively, the Engineers trailed tan\nV.O.C. by only 0.4 seconds. The\nFavorable Reputation\nSome people think that by developing outstanding teams: graduates Society will confine | teams, of which five made the results might have been differ\nthrough athletic subsidization, a university can build a favorable ; ^ls vears sr,ow to a \"mass dem-' playoffs. Incidentally, one of\nreputation, and thereby attract financial support by developing a i onstration.\" The show will take [these teams was undefeated in\nsense of pride within the alumni group, and by proving themselves i pjace tomorrow at 12:35 and j league play. None of the teams,\nworthy of aid. However, in most instances, the cost of the ou,\ agajn at 8:00 in the War Mem-1 however, managed to get beyond\nstanding team outreaches the benefits derived from that team. orjai Gym. the quarter finals.\nOth\u00E2\u0082\u00ACf WflVS i A Krand march, rhythmic calis-| In the Cross-Country, the En-\nSome may say that there are other ways to win without! thenics. folk dancing, modern I gineers fared somewhat better,\nathletic scholarships, this I doubt. While the present subsidization I dance numbers, mass pyramids. \ Led by Jack Butterfield who\nent had Hugh Greenwood, last\nyear's individual champion.'been\navailable to the Engineers. Unfortunately, Hugh was injured\nin the rugby game on Saturday.\nOf the sports yet to be played,\ngolf appears to be the best bet\nfor the Engineers. With John\ntrampolining,\nand\nadvanced tumbl-\nsystem is in practice at other Evergreen Conference colleges\nU.B.C. will continue to lose the majority of its games. Participa-; ing. and apparatus gymnastics I entry came in second,\ntion for the love of a sport is a very noble ideal, but no one likes j are just a few of the outstanding About this time in the Intra-\nto lose eighty per cent of his games. Team morale naturally suffers ; acts to be displayed, mural schedule, the Engineers\nand performance is thereby adversely affected. \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 , received a challenge from Corn-\nTo me. the present state of affairs is unacceptable as it is' *** 's the friendliest thing two. merce fQ|. a lootball gamCi Th(.\ndetrimental to the University's prestige, and I feel that Campus j People can do. regular Ubyssev reported on this\nathletic officials are faced with the choice of the adoption 0f _ Old fairies never die they just | wUh their ugual rnaccuracy At\nsome long range plan whereby B.C.'s outstanding athletes are \u00E2\u0096\u00A0 Mow away ... (fjrst {hcy impUed tnat tne g.,me\npersuaded to remain in this province or as an alternative. U.B.C. s Sophie says: \"That artsman I would not be tackle. As a mat-\ncomplete withdrawal from the Evergreen Conference. This year's ; vvas out with jast nj{,ht is so dumb ter of fact, all the Engineers in-\nhe thinks sex is a number be- sisted the game be tackle as\nplaced sixth, the Applied Science j Russell leading the way, the Ap\nvisit to\nMcGill was del'initelv a step in the right direction.\nBOB AFFLECK.\n3rd yr.Chem. Eng.\nBLOTZ DIARY\nContinued from Page 3\nFotheringham pleads Chem. Engineers Delight \n9:30. Tried out Kissometer\nwilh sorority girl. No reaction\non Kissometer or myself.\n10:30. Kissometer short - circuited Goes up in smoke when\n>ystem too dan- a frustrated Civil Engineer and\na frustrated third - year nurse\npuckei' up.\n1 1:00 -\u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0 12:30. General Hell-\ntwee n five and seven.\nsix\nthey believed this would probably be their last chance to\nclobber a few artsmen legally.\nAt this point the P.E. Depart-\nSaleslady (showing lingerie to ment refused to supply the equip-\nOne\nmonth\nnight with Venus,\nwith mercurv.\n10:1.1\n-.Malaria.\n-hoea bul Red Cross taps 3.8\n..\u00E2\u0080\u00A2c's of blood from him. anyhow.\nI'lugineer's offer of transfusion\nMimed down -- nurses consider\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0possible shock of 60 over-proof\noiii Pretty Bo>\n,4eroil>.\nan engineer): \"This is the only\nplace you can touch these for\nanything near the price.\"\n. 111:30 a iu. 5 .p.m. Consumed\nin calculating 32 mechanics problems, writing up 8 labs, listening to ti hours of lectures designing new Marpole bridge, one\niiniir of gawking at waitress in\noius Slop Coffee Bar\n8 0(1 Boys decide io support\nihe EUS by attending the Red\n?!acciianal Pnone Nurses Resi-\n\u00E2\u0096\u00A0fence;. three nurses trampled\noi the rush vv hen thev hear that\nKngiiuvrs are on the phone\ni* Oil Roll i ii \u00E2\u0080\u00A2 n Commodore\n-applied with several barrels of\nraising.\n12.30\niiit\n1:15.\n(Continued from Page One*\nPRE-LAW SOCIETY presents\nVancouver's foremost criminal\nlawyer. Angelo Branca, speaking\non \"Crime and Vancouver\", in\nPhysics 200 3:30 today.\n%\u00E2\u0080\u00A2%*\u00C2\u00A5*\nPARLIAMENTARY FORUM\npresents a debate on World University Service scholarships to\nEngineers descend upon be held in Arts 1.00 noon today.\n1:1.4 General drink-\nChinatown from all directions.\n4:00. Extract myself from\nwreck,me of Chinatown and trot\nhome to Fort Camp and six pages tet\nof calculus problems.\n4:30 Artsman room - male\nwakes up and wants to know\nwhy I am still up Lei him have\nit with the butt end of my slide-\nrule\nif. if. if.\nFILM SOCIETY will present\nW. Somerset Maugham's \"Quar-\nin the auditorium at noon\ntoday \"Quartet\" consists of\nfour ot Maugham's best short\nstories: \"The Alien Corn.\" \"The\nFacts of Life.\" \"The Kite.\" and\nThe Colonel's Lady.\" Admission is 25c\nment and the stadium. This phi\nlanthropic gesture was probably\nappreciated by the Commerce\n\u00E2\u0080\u00A2men, but the Engineers are still\ngnashing their teeth over their\nlost opportunity. Perhaps; next\nvear the P.E. Dept. will show a\nlittle more cooperation and both,\nthe Engineers and the Commu\nnity Chest will benefit.\nGetting back to the Intramurals. the next event was soccer.\nUnfortunately, because of the\npoor weather, this event hasn't there\nbeen completed. However, the\nEngineers have two teams entered and both teams have winning records to date.\nPING PONG STAR\nEngineer's table tennis star,\nEugene Butkov has reached the\nquarter finals of the singles\nchampion-hip\nLas! year Bob Hehberi and\nJack Hunter won the Intramural\nj plied Science entry should blast\ni its way 1o victory.\nAs the engineers carry on in\ntheir usual glorious manner then*\nis no reason to believe they will\nnot end up on top of the Intramural heap. It is obvious their\nsuperior athletic prowess w.U\nagain win them the Governors\nCup.\nGEOGRAPHY OF WOMEN\nFrom 13 to 16\nShe's like Africa\nVirgin and unexplored\nFrom 16 to 3^3\nShe's like Asia\nHot and exotic\nFrom 36 to 45\nShe's like America\nFully explored and\nher resources.\nFrom 46 to 56\nShe's like Europe\nExhausted but basin terest\nFrom 56 on\nShe's like Australia\nEverybody knows\nbut nobodv give.\ntre\npoi*\nit\na da:\nFirst Nurse: \"My new eng\nshowed me something new\nnight.\"\nSecond Nurse; \"Is thai rig'n'\nFirst Nurse: \"No. but it :>,\nlots of fun'\"\nThe ram went plunging \u00E2\u0096\u00A0\u00E2\u0096\u00A0.\nthe cl: if mil! ten n '. ' I).r.^ -\ndldnl -ee '.ha', euv Ml:';;\n_.sl.\nUBC, Alberta Hockey, Feb. 22,23"@en . "Newspapers"@en . "Vancouver (B.C.)"@en . "LH3.B7 U4"@en . "LH3_B7_U4_1954_02_18"@en . "10.14288/1.0123788"@en . "English"@en . "Vancouver : University of British Columbia Library"@en . "Vancouver : [publisher not identified]"@en . "Images provided for research and reference use only. Permission to publish, copy, or otherwise use these images must be obtained from The Ubyssey: http://ubyssey.ca/"@en . "Original Format: University of British Columbia. Archives"@en . "University of British Columbia"@en . "The Ubyssey"@en . "Text"@en .