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The Ubyssey Mar 29, 1985

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Array THE UBYSSEY
Vol. LXVII, No. 48
Vancouver, B.C. Friday, March 29,1985
228-2301
U.S. recruiter prompts complaints
By PATTI FLATHER
A U.S. company recruiting students at UBC lied to the registrar's
office to book rooms and is misleading some job-hungry students
with its interviewing techniques,
some people charge.
The Nashville-based Southwestern Company, which sells children's
encyclopedias and cookbooks in the
U.S., has been conducting three
hour long interview sessions three
times a day all this week.
Early this week Steve Davis, one
of the Southwestern recruiters, and
UBC student Erik Nelson, arts 2,
booked interviewing rooms through
the registrar's office by lying about
who they were, said administrative
clerk Alvia Branch Thursday.
Branch said she told them she only does room bookings for Alma
Mater Society-constituted clubs.
They told her they were applying to
create such a club called the Southwestern Club and that the bookings
would be for organizational meetings.
"If we knew what they were doing we would never have issued a
booking," Branch said. She said
she has warned Simon Fraser University about the group.
UBC's Canada Employment
Centre turned down Southwestern's
request one month ago to recruit at
UBC and use the centre interviewing rooms.
"We told them no because
they're hiring on a commission basis and the students have to go to
the U.S. We are supposed to be the
exclusive recruiters on campus,"
said centre director Ann Norberg.
Many students have signed their
names on Southwestern's yellow
posters distributed all over campus.
The posters promise summer work
and a $1,873.17 salary per month.
The two "student managers"
running the small group sessions,
Steve Davis and Jeff Rogers, say
they have already hired between 15
and 17 UBC students and plan to
hire 25 in total. These two young,
well-dressed men say they are from
Washington State. They are aided
by students, including some from
UBC such as Nelson and Alison
Porter, arts 4.
Students have found out about
the sessions through posters and
through Southwestern representatives approaching them on campus,
including while students are studying in libraries. The sessions are
Tories cosy up to U.S.
By VICTOR WONG
Canada is in danger of becoming
too friendly with the United States,
Jean Chretien said Thursday.
The federal Liberal external affairs critic told an overcrowded
Hebb Theatre he is uncomfortable
with the way the Conservative
government is cozying up to the
Reagan administration in the areas
of defence and economic development.
"I don't think we will win with
the Americans to play it the way
that Brian (Mulroney) does," he
said. "He says, 'You come here,
you're home, you do whatever you
want, I don't give a damn, as long
as you're nice to me.' "
Chretien said under the Liberals
Canada had only agreed to restore
the arms equilibrium between the
United States and the Soviet Union.
The cruise missile had been tested in
Canada as a contribution to that
equilibrium, he said.
"What I'm afraid of is that 'Star
Wars' is a decision of the
Americans not to be equal, but
ahead of the Russians."
Chretien said he did not buy the
notion that "Star Wars", the U.S.
Stategic Defence Initiative investigating a space defence against
nuclear weapons, is a research program. "Thirty billion dollars for
just the fun of searching?" he said.
He criticized the Conservative
government statement that Star
Wars research would mean jobs for
Canadians, saying it was making a
choice between immorality and
unemployment. "A month ago, De
Havilland refused to sell a lot of
planes to Libya for the reason they
were to be used in war, and we are
not merchants of war," he said.
"Jobs were lost. Nobody complained."
Chretien warned his enthusiastic
audience that if the Tory government continued its policy of more
free trade with the U.S., Canada
would wind up with only one
business client. "That is a very
dangerous position to be in,
because there will be a big recession
in the United States, and we will
just go down the drain so quickly,"
he said.
Canada should concentrate more
on getting trade from other countries, especially from the Pacific
Rim area, he said. "The money is in
the Pacific now. The Japanese are
getting extremely rich — did you
know that next year the Japanese
will have more foreign investment
than the Americans around the
world?"
"When you look at the masses of
population in China, in India and
so on, we're part of it. And we
should take advantage of it and
devote more time to open up
markets there, than to concentrate
ourselves just on one good client."
After the lecture and question
period Chretien was presented with
a soapstone sculpture by the Commerce Undergraduate Society,
which sponsored the speech
small and personal — a large one
Thursday noon in Buch B318 attracted 10 students.
The managers ask each person
their name and how much money
they saved the summer before.
Then one of them talks about the
company and the job.
Davis brought out endorsement
letters from U.S. senator Howard
Baker and the Nashville Chamber
of Commerce. He said the average
student made between $4,200 and
$5,500 Canadian from the job, adding some made up to $7,000.
Davis, joking continually and
calling students by their first names,
said the only catches are that stu
dents must work very hard and go
to training school in Nashville.
Students must find their own way
to Nashville and bring $250.
John Andrews, education 2, said
he went to a three hour session and
felt students were misled about the
problems   they   could   face   going
See page 2: ORGANIZER
— rory a. photo
just add water —
PROUD OF THEIR creation, Chemistry 205 students display result of a whole year's research
instant charisma.
UCBC gets to play with money
The Universities Council of B.C.,
not the provincial government, will
administer the "new special adjustment fund" for universities, the
universities minister said Sunday.
The special fund contains $14.9
million taken from the 1985-86 operating budgets for the province's
three universities. This budget has a
zero per cent decrease if this fund is
included, and a five percent cut if it
is not.
University officials have expressed concern the special fund will be
used to influence program cuts in a
"carrot and stick" manner, threatening university autonomy.
In a letter to universities minister
Pat McGeer, Simon Fraser University president William Saywell called the adjustment fund the "sole
remaining lifeline capable of preserving quality in our universities"
and expressed great concern about
its use.
He said inappropriate use of the
fund "will do lasting damage to the
universities."
Saywell said he welcomed
UCBC's role in disbursing the fund
as a sign of continuance of "the rational principle of university autonomy."
Universities council chair George
Morfitt said Thursday he believes
the universities' autonomy is guaranteed since the fund's disbursement is removed from the provincial government's hands. "I'm not
expecting requirements involving
specific programs," he said.
"We are advised by the govern
ment that the ministry of universities will provide the council with a
detailed summary of how that $14.9
million is to be administered," he
added.
When asked if a "detailed summary" can be called indirect government disturbance of university
autonomy, Morfitt said "it depends
what you consider autonomy."
Morfitt said the council did not
know if the government will give the
council the responsibility of making
exact money allocations, but he felt
sure the decisions would proceed in
a positive way.
Morfitt added McGeer has asked
UCBC for a five year economic
planning program.
Acting UBC president Robert
Smith could not be reached for
comment
Budget cuts force final exam schedule to be moved up one week
By LISA BANHAM
In an emergency press conference late
Thursday, UBC's acting president Robert
Smith announced final exams will begin April
4, five days earlier than planned.
Classes will end April 2, two days earlier
than planned, he added.
Smith said UBC's uncertain budget situation necessitated the change in plans. "We'll
have to lay off hundreds of faculty soon and
we don't want the layoffs conflicting with
final exams," Smith said.
"Moving the exam schedule ahead means
all markers and professors will have finished
marking exams before they are laid off."
He said all exams had to be moved up
because the departments and schools to be
cut have not yet been chosen.
Bruce Gellatly, vice president administration and finance, said he had attempted to
find financing systems by which the university could forestall the layoffs and avoid these
drastic measures but no system could be
found.
Smith said he was sorry for the inconvenience to students but his "hands are tied."
Visibly shaken, he added, "It's unfortunate
this sort of drastic action is necessary."
Acting vice president academic Dan Birch
said only deans have been notified of the
changed plans but faculty heads will be
meeting with their respective faculty today at
3:30 p.m. to discuss the changes.
Students who want to know their new exam schedules should phone special operators
at   228-8813,   228-2121,   228-5130,   and
228-2127.
Smith said the administration would do
everything possible to help students.
Nestor Pistorini, applied science 3, said he
thought the change wasn't that bad an idea.
"Tests are a pain and the sooner I finish the
sooner I leave this hellhole," Pistorini said.
Cynthia Blather, science 2, said the administration was acting entirely irresponsibly and
deserved a good ass-kicking and she'd like to
give Smith a piece of her mind. She added she
needed the extra time to study because the
courses this year are particularly tough.
See page 3: POPE Page 2
THE    UBYSSEY
Friday, March 29,1985
Organizer denies company misled students
From page 1
down to the U.S. He said they
glossed over details in their attempt
to make people enthusiastic about
the job.
"It's like it was brainwashing,"
he said. He said he wanted a job so
badly he did not ask questions, and
thought others felt the same way.
"I was controlled. I felt my
thoughts were restricted."
He said when his interview, with
three other students, finished Wednesday evening, two students were
called outside. A manager congratulated Andrews and Gary Cleven,
arts 1, telling them they had been
accepted for the job. It appeared
only they received the job, but Andrews said he found later that the
people in the hall were also congratulated.
Southwestern does not pay its
student workers until the end of the
summer, saying it doesn't want students to spend it all. And students
work   as   "independent   contract
ors," not direct employers. The
company establishes a line of credit
with each student so they can get
money during the summer.
Managers told some students they
could get 1.5 credits for a UBC
commerce course, Gary Cleven
said. Cleven said Jeff Rogers told
him Monday this was true, said he
wasn't sure the next day, and finally
on Wednesday said this is not true.
Cleven said he calculated from
the company contract forms and
statements that students would have
to work 12 to 14 hours per day six
days per week to earn much money.
For 1,092 work hours a student
would earn U.S. $4,000 gross, minus $1,500 expenses, leaving
$2,500.
This makes the hourly wage as little as $2.29 an hour, Cleven said.
Neil Risebrough, associate vice
president student services, said he
will investigate the company today.
He said UBC should not be provid
ing space for that kind of recruiting, adding students have access to
such jobs adequately through newspaper ads.
"Students are desperate these
days," he said. He said UBC may
not have a thorough enough screening process to keep such a company
away.
Erik Nelson, a UBC student organizer, said the charges concerning
the company are all ridiculous. He
said Davis told the registrar's office
they would be interviewing in the
rooms, adding they actually are
thinking of starting a UBC club.
He said approaching students in
vay   of
libraries   is   a   justifiable
reaching them.
He has never heard of anyone
having problems being stranded in
the U.S. without money while doing
the job, and defended the practice
of being paid at the end of the summer.
Changes in Award Application Deadlines
The following applications will be available from the Awards and Financial
Aid Office, Room 50, G.S.A.B. on Tuesday, April 2nd and must be submitted by May 15th. (Please note the previous deadline for these ap-
plicatins was July 1st.)
— General Application For University of B.C. Scholarships and For
Affiliation Awards Administered By The University of B.C.
— Application For University of B.C. Entrance Scholarships
Application   For   University   of   B.C.   Bursaries   —   forms   available
September 3rd; must be submitted by October 1st.
%»
'V^lft',
~&KFCM?E:&
WARNING: Health and Welfare Canada advises that danger to health increases with amount smoked —avoid inhaling. Average per Cigarette-
Export "A" Light Regular "tar" 10.0 mg., nicotine 0.8 mg. King Size "tar" 10.0 mg., nicotine 0.8 mg.
Export "A" Extra Light Regular "tar" 8.0 mg., nicotine 0.7 mg. King Size "tar" 9.0 mg., nicotine 0.8 mg. Friday, March 29, 1985
THE    UBYSSEY
Page 3
Student paper boycotts Maranatha
By ROBERT BEYNON
The Ubyssey would not run a
Campus Pro-Life Club advertisement because a group which has used cult-like tactics dominates the
club, a Ubyssey collective member
said Thursday.
Arts and entertainment editor
Charlie Fidelman said the Ubyssey
staff "boycotts Maranatha
Ministries ads based on in-depth
research done by Muriel Draaisma,
t^iPV:
former editor of The Ubyssey last
year."
She said the Marantathas used
questionable high-pressure tactics
to gain new members and to keep
them, including demanding that
young members consult with a
pastor for most decisions, including
taking a job or marrying.
She said although Maranathas
apparently did not numerically
overwhelm the pro-life club they
did influence it strongly in real
terms.
City editor Patti Flather said
Maranatha religious material is
distributed at pro-life club tables
and that a paid Maranatha
employee, Keith Coleman, approached her Monday about running the ad for a rally yesterday.
"If campus Pro-Life does not
want to seem affiliated with the
Maranathas   they   should   not   be
distributing their literature," she
said.
She added both pro-life representatives who approached her about
the ad were Maranatha activists and
they were confrontational.
But Keith Coleman, Maranatha
Ministries pastor, said both the
UBC's advertising clerk and the
editor he first spoke to, Patti
Flather, said the ad might not run
because it was pro-choice. It said:
"Campus Pro-life rally: students
against abortion . . . come and hear
the facts."
He said he was informed later
Monday the ad would not be running because of the club's Maranatha
affiliations.
Flather said she did say the ad
might be questioned by staff
because of its anti-abortion stance.
She said she told Coleman she could
not accept the ad until the staff
voted on it. Staff would not have
boycotted the ad if it was from a
pro-life group less connected with
Maranathas, she said.
Maranatha Ministries are a
U.S.-based group founded in 1972
by Robert Weiner. Since that time
the organization has grown to include 100 U.S. chapters and 16
foreign chapters.
But some parents complained
that children who entered the
groups underwent radical personality changes and said Maranatha appeared to be a cult. According to an
August, 1984 Christianity Today article: "Typically, their grades were
failing, and they were giving
Maranatha large sums of money
that had been earmarked for education."
Fundamentalist groups in the
U.S. are still investigating
Maranatha.
Petition asks support for
Jewish Russian student
- rory a. photo
ANTI-ABORTIONIST PARTICIPATES in rally in front of SUB Thursday
noon. Campus Pro-Life Club organized music and speakers, and 100 people showed up.
By CHARLIE FIDELMAN
Two organizations collected signatures Tuesday on a petition asking for the deportation of a young
Soviet art student from the Soviet
Union.
The North American Jewish Students' Network in connection with
UBC's Hillel House set up a table in
SUB concourse to collect signatures
asking for the immediate release of
Misha Taratuta.
Taratuta, 24, has been trying unsuccessfully to emigrate since 1978.
He was refused on grounds that he
might have acquired state secrets
from his father who had worked as
a mathematician in a government
office five years earlier.
He was also refused application
to an art college and an institute of
minerology for failing entrance exams. He falls into the 'normal' pattern of Jewish students who fail the
exams and are then denied admittance to institutes of higher education.
Without immigration or student
visa status, males are then eligible
for conscription in the army, which
includes  another  five  years  after
conscription in the Soviet Union for
security reasons.
Network and Amnesty UBC
spoke to Misha Taratuta in March
1984 from Vancouver MLA John
Fraser's office, said a Network
spokesperson.
The taped conversation is translated from Russian. Taratuta spoke
of his plans for the future. He is
studying pre-university courses in
order to get into the school of architecture in Leningrad and is meantime recovering from his stint in the
army. He thanked everyone for
their concern and efforts.
Cassandra Freeman, a graduate
student and Network spokesperson,
said the signatures on the petition
are a great response, especially at
the end of the school year when students are suffering from great apathy and stress. She said the Taratuta case has been a continuous four
year struggle.
The petitions will be presented to
John Fraser who will then hopefully
forward them to external affairs
minister Joe Clark, she added.
About 125 Jewish students demonstrated in Ottawa outside the
Soviet embassy Tuesday. The students came from across Canada to
express concern about the treatment
of Jews in the Soviet Union to Joe
Clark, who will be visiting the Soviet Union next week.
Use override section in charter
By PATTI FLATHER
The time has come to use the
override section 33 in the Canadian
Charter of Rights and Freedoms
which ensures parliament supremacy over courts, B.C.'s attorney-
general said Thursday.
Brian Smith told 200 people at a
$250 per person charter conference
in SUB ballroom that section 33 of
the charter, which allows provinces
to establish laws going against the
charter, should be used on occ
sion.
Smith said the court decision to
allow violent pornography across
the border "will be seen by the public as opening the flood gates of the
pornography industry. Surely it is
the time to use the legislative override and return the power to parliament."
The override acts as a safeguard
against a court headed in a direction
against the public will, said Smith,
who told a lawyer's conference in
the Caribbean recently that some
people should be killed by firing
squads. He said agreement on the
charter would not have happened
without the override, adding at least
five provinces supported the charter
on the basis of the override.
He said if Canadian courts were
supreme, constitutional amendments would be possible but very
difficult. Judges are not elected but
appointed, and may not be more
enlightened than elected representa
tives, he said.
Smith said Canada and the
United Kingdom are no worse at
preserving rights and freedoms than
the U.S., although in the U.S.
courts are supreme and the former
parliament was. Although the rights
of Japanese-Canadians were violated during their WW II internment,
"similar reprisals against so-called
aliens took place in the United
States," he said.
At  the November  1981  confer
ence where the charter was ratified,
it appeared the province could not
agree which could have lead to a
divisive federal referendum on the
charter.
"Premier (Bill) Bennett was a
major unifying force," Smith
claimed.
The conference on The Canadian
Charter of Rights and Freedoms,
sponsored by Pacific Institute of
Law and Public Policy, continues
today.
Pope blesses our exams
From page 1
Boffo the clown, applied science
3, said he giggled with glee at the
thought of earlier exams. "I'll
return to the circus that much
quicker," said Boffo, rubbing his
nose on his red sleeve.
U.S. president Ronald Reagan
could only reply "damn Soviet."
His wife said "yes, dear" in reply.
Bill Bennett said B.C.'s young
people need to face more challenge
and be "good British Columbians"
taking all their knowledge with
equanamity. He added the government has Venture Capital loans for
all those who want to go into used
car sales and students should not
fear for tomorrow.
Jesus Christ, contacted in glory,
quoted himself: "Look at the lillies
of the field, who neither spin nor
toil." Christ said prayer to himself
and his Mother in heaven should
help us all endure the toils of UBC
life.
Satan said Christ is full of shit
and never wrote an exam anyways.
He added heaven is full of shit too
and we really should become used
car sales people or join the provincial legislature if we want to get
ahead in life.
Pope John Paul II said it was a
shame our school year would be
aborted like this and promised to
talk to those in charge. "It's just a
bloody mess," he said.
Prime Minister Mulroney could
only say his government might
create star wars jobs for anyone
who failed. "They'd be a blast," he
added, "or is that a bomb?"
- rory a. photo
PRO CHOICE SUPPORTER, one of approximately 20 supporters, participates in pro choice rally held simultaneously to pro life rally held last
Thursday at noon. Page 4
THE    UBYSSEY
Friday, March 29, 1985
High fees scare away foreign students
MONTREAL (CUP) — More
and more foreign students, balking
at high differential fees, are passing
up universities in Ontario and
Quebec and instead picking universities in Manitoba and Saskatchewan, where they pay the same tuition as Canadians.
There are 6,000 fewer foreign students in Ontario and Quebec universities now than two years ago,
though the two provinces still hold
60 per cent of all foreign students in
Canada.
Meanwhile, there are 2,400 foreign students in Manitoba, compared to 1,500 three years ago, and
905 in Saskatchewan, compared to
766 three years ago. Foreign student
enrolment in the rest of Canada has
remained stable.
Overall there are 30,300 foreign
students in Canadian universities,
compared with 36,900 two years
ago.
In Quebec, differential fees for
foreign students are $5,800, 10
times what they were six years ago.
Fees have also risen sharply in Ontario, though they vary by school.
At Queen's University, foreign students pay $5,500 a year, while they
pay $4,500 a year at the University
of Ottawa.
Fred Francis, foreign student adviser at Concordia University in
Montreal, said the numbers are declining because there's no concerted
policy to attract foreign students
here.
Campus-
Cuts
Government drives away researchers
OTTAWA (CUP) — The federal
government's failure to fund its research granting agencies adequately
is driving away hundreds of qualified researchers, says a leading Canadian geneticist.
"The biggest challenge of science
in this country is the ability to attract young people to stay and do
their thing. We have not been successful in this,' Dr. Louis Simino-
vitch said.
"We really don't have the people
who can do the work here (in Canada)."
Siminovitch blamed the federal
government for the exodus of researchers. He said the government
spends too little money on research
and too much on researchers working in isolation in small institutes
across the country. He said it
should instead direct funding to
top-notch scientists working together in central locations.
Projects for thousands of Canadian scientists will be put on hold
until the federal government comes
up with the money.
5736 University Blvd.
(UBC Village)
228-1471
AMS SPEAKERS presents
DR. HENRY
MORGENTALER
from Toronto
Fri.# April 12, 7 p.m.
(Door 6 p.m.)
SUB BALLROOM
Advance Tickets $5.00 at
AMS Box Office only
Treat Yourself To Some Deluxe
HOME COOKING
At The Quintessential Kits Restaurant
Great Food and a Great Deal Too!
A Very Highly Recommended Place to Eat
•  Fully Licensed
•  We Take Plastic
ll:30-Midnight Mon.-Sat.
Till 10 Sunday
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CUECKER5
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Monday Thru Saturday!
All Appetizers
1/2 Price + 50c
4 P.M. - 7 P.M.
682-1831
TW
overlooking English Bay
The University of British Columbia
ENGLISH COMPOSITION TEST
The English Composition Test will be Held on
Wednesday, April 10, 1985
from 1:30 to 4:00 p.m.
Every student must attach to the examination booklet either a "Fee Waived" sticker obtainable from the Registrar's Office by those taking the exam for the first time), or a "Fee Paid" sticker ($10.00), which must be
purchased from the Department of Finance.
University regulations state, "Each person taking the exam should be
prepared to produce, upon request, his or her Library/AMS Card."
Students are permitted the use of a dictionary
NOTE: The ECT will also be given on Friday, July 19, 1985
from 7:00 to 9:30 p.m., and on Thursday, September 26, 1985
from 4:30 to 7:00 p.m.
TAKE ACTION
OVER
DRINKING
/ like the taste of a cold beer on a hot day,
but I certainly don't think you have to get the gang
together with a couple of cases of beer just to celebrate
the fact you've had
a bit of exercise."
Canada
l+
JOHN WOOD
Health Santeet
and Welfare     Bien-etre social
Canada Canada Friday, March 29, 1985
THE    UBYSSEY
Page 5
Ex-Ubysseyer does good,
returns to vile rag
"The best lack all
conviction, while the
worst are full of passionate intensity."
— W. B. Yeats, The
Second Coming.
So says the message reeking of
infinite profundity mounted
on a door in the Vancouver
Magazine offices on Richards
Street. Now as as you may suspect,
there are many doors in the austere
digs of this award-winning Yup-
piefied publication.
But behind this door, a
rock'n'roll column entitled In One
Ear and feature articles are banged
out on a beat-up with an unbridled
fury IBM electric. The words
eminating from the old IBM shoot
down my naively-held notions of
journalistic license. Could it be the
writer responsible took one too
many hits of acid before deadline?
Indeed, Les Wiseman's efforts at
filling column inch upon column
inch of glossy magazine space with
what he calls "tangential explorations," cast doubt on his very
soundness of mind. Take his recent
rantings on about Vancouver's
latest convert to pop music — Ann
Mortifee: "She was cooperative
and not unpleasant to gaze upon,
but she has a wierd bathroom.
"The W.C. opens directly onto
the dining room by way of a
picture-window-like aperture beginning above the rim of the tub; the
room can be rendered vaguely
private by means of a couple of
flimsy louvered shutters.
"Since Mortifee often spends
'two to three' hours in the tub, she
can carry on communication with
those in the dining area. Groovy,
but suffice it to say an exposed
bathroom is sufficiently intimidating that my back teeth were
floating by the time 1 concluded the
interview."
Ahem. It's writing — to coin an
understatement — that gives new-
meaning to the word eccentricity.
Brings to mind the days of my
youth when pissed off at sis (and
ready to piss), 1 would hole up in
our W.C. with a stack of my Archie
comics. Whilst sitting on the shitter,
fuming away about the grave injustice my sibling had committed,
Archie and the gang would always
perk me up, thus ending my standoff in time for Gilligan's Island.
Nowadays, a heavy dose of
Wisemanian prose is a quick-acting
panacea for snarly bitchiness. His
profiles and album reviews of the
musically inclined (or as is often the
case, the musically retarded), and
his off-beat excursions into feature
writing, have the peculiar and
somehow soothing effect of being
both funny 'ha ha' and funny
'weird.' (And not to mention the effect one imagines he has on blood
pressure levels and grey hair growth
of Van Mag editors.)
In the flesh, the neither fastidious
nor feeble scribe doesn't quite live
up to expectations of a rock writer
with bloodshot eyes and grease-
laden hair. He's decked out in
Calvin Klein jeans faded just
enough to be deemed hip and a
pseudo-Polo, alligatoresque shirt.
He sports a nearly trimmed beard,
an earring dangles from his right
lobe.
by CHRIS WONG
Sitting with him in his dishevelled
pigeon-hole of an office one Friday
afternoon, I asked myself: Is this
the   same   guy   who   acted   on   a
the reader concluded.
By some strange quirk of nature,
three other infuriated readers wrote
in so they too could foam at the
"unintentional slurs" that only appeared as a result of "oversights."
So ended the controversial high
point of his brief two year sojourn
on the vilest rag west of Bianca.
When not trying to complete an
on-again off-again English degree,'
Wiseman whittled away his spare
hours on the rag. The blossoming
print urchin even got to interview a
few  of his  rock  heroes  like Lou
LES WISEMAN,
Photo by Alex Waterhouse-Hayward
right, with Dee Snider of Twisted Sister doing tangential things . . .
visceral urge to ask Gene Simmons
of Kiss about the length of his
tongue?
CEEEXZXZXX3
"Who is Les Wiseman
and who's he trying to
kid?"
— The Ubyssey letters
pages, Oct. 13, 1977.
That's   the   question   an   irate
mouth about Wiseman's apparent
homophobia. Drawing the most ire
were his musings about Stewart's
transformation into a "raving
bloody fruit." For nostalgia value if
nothing else, here's a snippet of
how a young shaggy haired Les
Wiseman butchered Rod the Clod's
gig-
"Well the old grey goose ain't
what he used to be! For one thing
he's now a shocking blonde. It used
Reed and Captain Beefhart. "It was
very much the days of very
rebellious first person journalism,"
he says. "Half the leads of the
stories were talking about how
wrecked you were when you wrote
the piece. I think everybody wanted
to be junior Hunter Thompsons."
Ah, yes. Hunter S. Thompson,
the founder of the 'how-to-peak-
on-mescaline-and-still-pump-out-
decent copy' school of journalism,
'We'll groom you as a writer' . . .
Hell, they not only groomed him, they gave him journalistic manicure
Ubyssey reader asked in a letter that
took offense to Wiseman's appraisal of a Rod Stewart concert
and a film about musclemen, Pumping Iron — both published the
week previous in The Ubyssey's
Page Friday arts section.
"Wiseman may be stuck with his
prejudices for life. But surely he can
do something about his ignorance,"
to obvious that Rod would be a
great guy to share a bottle with, a
real one of the guys, someone could
really roll in the gutter with. These
days, however, you'd get rather,
nervous if he decided to stand at the
urinal next to you."
The editors printed a retraction
alongside the letters, saying
Wiseman's    comments    were
was bound to come up at some
point in this diatribe. Thompson's
"Gonzo" journalism that frequently swallowed whole, unsuspecting
readers of Rolling Stone in the
seventies, did not escape Wiseman's
ever watchful eye. And lest we
forget Kurt Vonnegut Jr., another
literary influence.
How did the aberrant works of
these two get lodged in Wiseman's
grey matter? "When (Thompson)
wrote about how he went to a doctor and the doctor diagnosed him as
having the worst case of anxiety he
had ever seen, I just related 100 per
cent because I consider myself a,
person who lives in a chronic anxiety attack 24 hours a day.
"The Kurt Vonnegut side of it
came from the fact that he was
always a real humanist; he was
always a great believer in salvation
and redemption. And I think that's
what life is all about." (Praise the
Lord!)
EXEEDCEDE3DC
"/ am beginning to see the
light . . .".
— The Velvet Underground,
1969.
Yup. The rest of this sordid tale
sure makes sense now.
Armed with his Ubyssey portfolio, Wiseman ambled into the
Vancouver Magazine offices in his
graduation suit on a spring day in
1978. He asked for an application
form for a writing job, prompting
rude cackling noises from the receptionist who suggested he make an
appointment with the chief hack —
Malcolm Parry.
Wiseman wisely followed suit
and once again donned his grad
duds for the encounter with Parry.
(Somehow I can't see Les Wiseman
in a suit. It would almost be as absurd as seeing Mr. T. in drag.)
After Parry looked at Wiseman
and asked, "Why are you dressed
so funny?" he rejected the idea of
instituting a rock'n'roll column.
But he asked if Wiseman was interested in writing those
humongous vehicles for injecting
colour and interpretation known as
features. Not surprisingly, the
response was in the affirmative, and
he set out to do an in-depth piece on
the Vancouver punk scene.
Seeing as he didn't know what a
feature was, Wiseman had his work
cut out for him. But after a summer
of delays and uncertainty, Wiseman
— who by now had moved up a
notch on the commercial press ladder to the Georgia Straight — found
himself one day holding the
September, 1978 issue of Vancouver Magazine. His story got
cover billing. The former Port
Alberni hippie had made it. Well,
he could at least pay the rent and
chuck the Kraft dinners. "That was
the happiest day of my life up to
that point. There I was, a serious
pro journalist." Violins please.
He had to keep coughing up for
rent, so off he went into the
workworld while his typewriter keys
were kept in action producing that
long sought-after rock column. He
drove a cab for eight days, a fate
suffered by many a starving writer.
And Wiseman was a ditch digger on
the Seawall project until he got the
call to become assistant editor of
the thriving magazine.
But the joke was on poor Les; the
offer was a false alarm. Wiseman,
never the one to express himself in
subtleties, let his indignation be
known. "I said, 'That's fucking
great, I just quit my job. I'm doomed.' "
In lieu of pumping him up with
valium, Wiseman was handed the
old 'we'll groom you as a writer'
line. Hell, they not only groomed
him, they gave him a journalistic
manicure.
Umpteen by-lines later, Wiseman
is  now  listed   in   the  magazine's'
masthead under the unassuming title
See page 9: WISEMAN Page 6
THE    UBYSSEY
Friday, March 29,1985
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Infamous Villains
perform to large
house with ease
By LAWRENCE BECKER
Clean, and fully lighted, the stage
lay bare while awaiting one of the
best "motion promotion" bands to
visit the SUB ballroom in years.
On Friday night, The Villains
played to a full house of students
who eagerly awaited the chance to
unfetter themselves before a month
of final exams.
The evening started with Vertigo,
a high school band that combined
current pop with the "twang" of
the late '60s rock. They started at
8:30 p.m., and played continually
until 9:30, leaving the stage amid an
appreciative reception from the approximately 100 people there.
While the audience waited 40
minutes for The Villains to appear,
copious amounts of Miller's liquid
brown draft were ingested at the inflated price of $1.75 a glass.
During this period the ballroom
filled, and it was even rumored that
a few members of the War Games
Club arrived for a little post-
thermonuclear-war boogying.
No dramatic entrance was required by The Villains, as sax player
Tom Perry, a former physics
teacher at St. George's private
school, received quite a few cheers
just for tuning up his instrument on
stage.
stage instead of escaping for what
turned out to be a 25 minute recess.
The last 40 minutes were much
the same as the first 80, and it was
then that some songs began to
sound repetitive. Audience participation to the lyrics "na-na-na" was
understandably minimal, but no
one, including the band, seemed to
care as people wound down.
At 12:30 the concert ended, and
Villain's original music was
refreshing to hear instead
of top 40.
At 10:20 the lights illuminated,
and The Villains began playing
without the usual "golly gee it's
great to be back" attitude that most
repeat performers feel they have to
ooze over a UBC audience to win
them over.
The dance was supervised by the
mining faculty of which a few members decided that impersonating
Colonel Klink from Stalag 13 was
the correct attitude for crowd control. Three stamp checks at the
door, and blockage of the north
washrooms were just two examples
of the unwarranted restrictions imposed by a few overly-zealous individuals.
In the ballroom itself, the crowd
oscillated early as The Villains played three quick numbers before entering into a slower reggae tune.
Their original material was refreshing to hear instead of the usual top
40 numbers that many bands slip into their routine. Almost double the
age of the Vertigo players The
Villains nonetheless maintained a
high degree of activity while jiving
across the stage in accompaniment
to Perry's amplified sax.
The sound was generally clear
throughout, although portions intended for the organ to dominate
were sometimes muffled by the
acoustic guitar and drum lead-ins.
Feedback was non-existent, but
some band members seemed to be
hampered in their mobility by unusually short mike cords.
By 11:30 p.m., three-quarters of
the ballroom were filled with the reverberation of steamy bodies craving more music and more beverages. The songs remained uninterrupted as The Villains strung tunes
together in an escalade of singing
pop that ended only when they took
a 20 minute break. Some band
members talked to the audience on
at 12:31 the minors were reminding
us that it was time to leave. I exited
by the north entrance and was
grateful that the accessibility to the
bathroom now included civilians.
The sound of The Villains is not
new, but the only hook they need to
book themselves for 1,000+ audiences is to maintain their current intensity and sincerity. For the last
party, it was a lot of fun.
socks off
hot house
By DAVID FERMAN
Without a guitar in hand, David
Wilcox looks amazingly ordinary, a
sort of mild mannered John Belushi
with red rimmed Cookie Monster
eyes. But give him a Fender
Telecaster, a microphone and an
audience, and David Wilcox can
rock your socks off.
The Montreal blues/rocker did
precisely that for three nights at the
Town Pump.
From the first screaming note,
Wilcox had the joint jumping. The
music is straight ahead electric blues
and is infectiously danceable. As a
musician Wilcox is a virtuoso. He
tears into his instrument, squeezing
out every possible sound. He plays
straight blues, R & B rhythms,
funk, shuffles, Bo Diddley beats,
and a mean slide guitar. In the middle of Sugar Bee he lets out a whelp,
"sting me!" and then goes into a
piercing treble solo that stings like a
hornet; onomatopoeia guitar.
Song starts years ago in
Vancouver swamp, crawling out of slime.
When he broke a guitar string he
wasn't fazed, but merely kept soloing, and then restrung as he gave a
hilarious introduction to his epic
tale of male-female relations, Man
Woman Thing. The story starts five
trillion years ago in the swamp of
Vancouver when the first man and
woman crawl out of the slime, all
the way up to the invention of the
all-powerful, unending terror —
alimony.
Wilcox is not just a guitar player
but also a talented showman. When
he cuts into Ice Cream Man, he
yells, "One of my flavours is
guaranteed to satisfy", shakes his
body and rolls his Marty Feldman
eyes deliriously. He has a solid
voice, and is capable of a great
rockabilly hiccup.
Just as entertaining, to this
warped reporter at least, was
Wilcox's constant banter;
throughout the show he mugs, guffaws, and is nothing if not the
master of bad jokes. In his hit
Downtown Came Uptown For You,
he sings, "you taught me to eat
snails", then proceeds to swallow
the microphone. There is an obvious limit to all his talent and, mercifully, the small stage did not allow
him room to dance like he wanted
to.
Unfortunately this is not an unqualified rave. Between sets Wilcox
and his band (Whitey Glan on
drums and Harp the "spaceman"
on bass) took an aggravating break
of over an hour. When they returned without giving any explanation
for the break the audience was getting angry. Sensing the crowd's
displeasure, Wilcox joked, "I just
had a seriousity attack. Ever had a
seriousity attack?". Then he ripped
into his biggest hit, My Eyes Keep
Me In Trouble, and all was
forgiven.
Every song was enjoyed and even
the drum solos had happy people
dancing, although it is difficult to
say whether dancing to a drum solo
is a reflection on the playing or the
Town Pump's beer sales.
The show ended on a high note as
Wilcox snarled a blue version of a
Louis Louie/Wild Thing medley.
The last song was a maniacal
farewell Johnny B. Goode song. He
performed lying down with his
guitar, picked his last blue notes
and said, "Be good, and if you
can't be good, have fun". Then he
laughed self-mocking, "Physician,
heal thyself".
After the show that ended at 2:00
a.m., Wilcox said he was pleased
with the show, and if Saturday
night's show matched Friday's,
then he succeeded in delivering his
brand of "serious fun".
M
Wi Icox rocks    U
s
c
Allen creates clear
film in Purple Rose
By FRANCO POLILLO
The movie is a physical impossibility. But that does not stop
Woody Allen from creating a
clearer film. During the depression
in New Jersey, Mia Farrow stars as
a poor, abused housewife who
escapes the drudgery of her life by
watching films over and over again.
She never seems to tire of the same
old lines or actors. Little does she
now the actors are also watching
her.
Celia (Mia Farrow) finds her life
has gone from bad to worse. She
suffers, married to an unloving husband who not only cheats on her
but also beats her — only when she
'deserves' it, of course. She works a
hateful waitressing job for an over
demanding boss, and earns extra by
doing peoples' laundry only to have
her money gambled away by her
husband.
It is easy to understand Celia's
addiction to the silver screen. She
has seen the Purple Rose of Cairo (a
Hollywood romance kind of movie)
four times already, but when she
loses her job where can she run to
for support? Shattered emotionally,
she watches the screen, once more
dreaming of a better life.
Then, suddenly, Tom Baxter,
(Jerry Daniels), an archaeologist
and explorer sees Celia in the audience again. From his position on
the screen he speaks out to her saying that she must really like this
See page 7: AUDIENCE Friday, March 29, 1985
THE    UBYSSEY
Page 7
Audience has
tit for tat with
screen actors
From page 6
movie to have come so many times.
Then, in a burst of fantasy he steps
out of the screen, grabs Celia by the
hand, and coerces her to leave the
theatre with him. He has been enchanted by her. He left the picture
because he wants to live with Celia
and make her happy.
It cannot be possible everyone
claims. This unprecedented occurence, naturally, disturbs all
those involved. The rest of the film
is the hilarious result. The
characters left on the screen are as
upset as the audience by what has
happened. They cannot continue
the movie without Tom Baxter,
who is crucial to the plot.
The audience, on the other hand,
protests against the interruption of
the narrative. The actors defend
their position arguing they are not
at fault. The remaining characters
this fantasy lover is not the joy she
expected.
Furthermore, Tom himself is
having trouble adapting to the
world. He cannot be the kind of
person the writers of the movie intended. He has no wealth off the
screen and somehow things do not
work out as well as they do in the
movies. Tom and Celia realize in
order for them to have the kind of
life dreams are made of, they will
have to go back to Tom's world.
They step back into the film and
live, for a brief time, the
Hollywood life, which has its shortcomings but they are happy there.
Meanwhile, Gil Shepard, who is
the actor who fleshed Tom out,
(Jerry Daniels) is worried about his
career. He cannot have a character
he created running free in the
world. He, too, has been enchanted
by Celia and would like her to stay
... in a burst of fantasy he steps out of the
screen, grabs Celia by the hand and coerces her
to leave with him.
on the screen and the audience continue an interesting tit for tat
throughout the rest of the film.
The unusual Allen plot allows for
a profound examination of reality
and the Hollywood kind of illusive
reality. When Tom Baxter steps out
of the film but in reverse. That is,
he is a fictional character who steps
out of an imaginary place into the
'real world.'
Unlike Alice, Tom knows himself
well and is very much aware of his
role as a character. Although he is
as perfect a mate as anyone would
want, Celia is already married and
in her real world she cannot justify
being with Tom while she is still
married.  It becomes obvious that
with him. This leaves the star-struck
Celia more confused. She must
choose between her fictional love
and a real life actor.
Alas, she knows she must choose
the real world, because she is after
all a real person and not a fictional
being. Although it seems God has
smiled on Celia by providing her
with a real and fantasy lover. The
real only leaves New Jersey without
Celia and she remains with her
dreams — even more unhappy.
The People Rose of Cairo is a
wonderful play on fantasy and
reality. The movie is entertaining;
yet, the audience is reminded that
deception through fantasy can
make one miserable.
The most sensational sound
you'll ever see!
■^^JnnWisw>
(tdKr^fsitcpi
l iww<;
Where every sound creates a picture,
RE-KECXJRUED IN DIGITAL STEREO
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jgje&ir        (WHilVM.SOtNDTH.WiK.Mja M WAHUHJIONHt FNV\ ISi \ KlttJdHnS.
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OPENING TODAY AT THE DENMAN PLACE
(683-4647)
Testimonial
I never joined
The Ubyssey.
Now I get
photographed
in front of
grotesquely
oversize
diaphragms,
unsuitable
for human use.
Jim
UBC WINTER SPORTS CENTRE
WE WISH TO SAY
THANK YOU
FOR ANOTHER SUCCESSFUL SEASON
TO THE STUDENTS, FACULTY AND STAFF
WHO USED AND ENJOYED OUR FACILITIES THIS SEASON
UBC ATHLETIC DEPT.
SCHOOL OF PHYSICAL EDUCATION
UBC THUNDERBIRD HOCKEY TEAM
UBC INTRAMURALS RECREATION UBC
FACULTIES OF: -
LAW COMMERCE ENGINEERING PLANNING (SCHOOL) DENTISTRY
FORESTRY      PHARMACY     ARCHITECTURE (SCHOOL)     SCIENCE      AGRICULTURE
STUDENT RESIDENCES:- CURLING GROUPS:- FRATERNITIES:-
WALTER GAGE UBC CURLING CLUB PHI GAMMA DELTA
TOTEM PARK TRIUMPH DEKES
PLACE VANIER UBC LAW
POINT GREY
WE ARE PLEASED TO ANNOUNCE
SUNDAY HOURS OF SALE
IN OUR BAR/LOUNGE
For Your Enjoyment, Begin March 31/85
SEE YOU
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USED
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9:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.*n.
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BOOKSTORE
::228-474l ::::::::::::: Page 8
THE    UBYSSEY
Friday, March 29, 1985
More job ideas
Our politic and illustrious federal government looks out for us.
Prime minister Brian (Mr.) Mulroney and the Tories want jobs, for us.
Jobs for Canadians. Yup.
In fact, they are so anxious to find jobs they are seriously considering
participating in the U.S. Strategic Defense Initiative, affectionately known
as Star Wars. Mulroney, external affairs minister Joe Clark, and defence
minister Erik Nielsen all said Canadian jobs in Star Wars are extremely attractive and something to be considered closely.
Now the U.S. has specially invited Canada, along with other politically
correct countries, to participate in their stupendous $26 billion research effort which aims to build space defenses against nuclear weapons.
We, The Ubyssey, with all our hearts, urge the Canadian government to
do the following:
• grab Star Wars for all its worth. Ignore Communist sympathizers who
say Star Wars threatens the 1972 Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty signed by the
U.S. and the USSR. Canadian jobs come before silly international treaties
seeking to control nuclear weapons;
• improve the Canadian weapons industry, with some healthy influxes
of taxpayer money. The Third World market for arms is growing even
faster than demand for food — the hungry aren't the ones buying arms,^
• more aggressive marketing of Candu nuclear reactors would
stimulate a few jobs. Canada hasn't done enough to sell nuclear
technology to other countries, and India appreciated Canada's help in
developing their own nuclear weapons — maybe Turkey would too;
• put all the unemployed rabble-rousers who say Canada should support a mutually verifiable nuclear arms freeze in the United Nations into the
military and put them in the front lines;
• The Canadian government should also be careful not to succumb to
the job creation ideas of bleeding hearts. They should avoid community
oriented jobs.
And the Tories should watch for people who say job money spent on the
military will create more jobs in the civilian sector. This kind of rational
argument might sway voters; and we don't want Canadians listening to rational argument when we want to cosy up to Ronnie, do we?
THE UBYSSEY
March 29, 1985
The Ubyssey is published Tuesday and Fridays throughout the
academic year by the Alma Mater Society of the University of British
Columbia. Editorial opinions are those of the staff and are not
necessarily those of the university administration or the AMS.
Member Canadian University Press. The Ubyssey's editorial office is
SUB 241k. Editorial department, 228-2301/2305. Advertising,
228-3977/3978.
Chronic lack of staffers continued at Ubyssey production night. Pattt yelled it was due to the threats
of the Maranathas. Charlie was too busy worrying about what lime the Sun would rise to notice the
lack of staff. Brian Dennison noticed the lack of staff because he needed ideas for the joke story. Fran
co Polillo was in too much of a hurry to get to his grammar, spelling and typing class to observe the office. Chris Wong was also fretting about the rise and fall nf the Sun lo do much for the paper. Victor
Wong found the Sun hurt Ins eyes. Dave Ferman rushed off to the School of Theology and didn't
spend time at the primers. Rory Allen spent his time in the darkroom with the dudes. Debbie Lo had
two ciders with dinner and wasn't fit to do any work. Sarah Milhn helped despite the second round of
elections Robert Beynun spent his time rearranging the ads Lawrence Becker was just glad the north
washrooms were open to reporters
H( see you -at the m/-l t*v&|;
j
jabv%
Letters
How can people fight rape and harassment?
In light of the recent letters to
The Ubyssey outlining attacks on
women on or near campus, we have
decided to ask your readers for
help.
Sexual harassment and rape happen at UBC. Rumor has it that they
happen often, but it's difficult to
tell since the campus RCMP refuse
to release details or statistics. Consequently, it's impossible for a woman to judge the safety of her activities, be it walking to B lot, waiting for a bus, going to a dance, etc.
The police silence also makes the
enemy invisible. How can people
fight back against rape and harass
ment if they don't know the nature
of the beast?
One wonders if the RCMP have
deliberately chosen to bury their
heads in the sand over this issue —
pretending perhaps that if they ignore it, it might go away. Perhaps
they too have unconsciously succumbed to the myth that it's not a
serious problem, since "every woman wants/deserves/needs it" anyway.
Old ideas die hard, but the time
has come for people to grapple with
the problem of rape and sexual harassment, to talk about its causes
and its cures.
In order to accomplish this, we
need to start by defining the problem.
To achieve this, for UBC at least,
we appeal to readers who have been
attacked, assaulted or sexually co
erced at some time in the university
community to tell their stories.
Please contact us, the AMS Women's Centre (a student-run service
group) at SUB 130, or through campus mail at Box 103, SUB. When
women and parents phone us to ask
"How safe is the campus?" there
must be a better answer than "nobody really knows."
Danica Gleave
for the UBC Women's Centre
Beware of student job scam here
Save Dit* Who from 18 month
hold and write BBC to save show
Calling aO Dr. Who fans!
Did you know that the BBC is
planning to put Dr. Who on an
18 month hiatus? This will
begin as soon as the present
season finishes and there is no
guarantee that the show will recommence after this hiatus!
Can any program, even one
as popular as Dr. Who, survive
18 months off the air? The
final decision about this move
will be made mid-April 1985.
If you want to have your say
on the matter, write: Alistair
Mifate*' director-general BBC,
Portland Place, London
W1A 1AA, United Kingdom
as soon as possible (perhaps
even Special Delivery).
Mark the envelope Personal
and Confidential. Perhaps we
can persuade the BBC to
change its mind.
Linda Gifl-Anmha
education 2
Beware of a major scam on campus. Representatives have conducted slick, mind-boggling, 2 to 3 hour
interviews in many unbooked classrooms in Buchanan A block in
search of suckers to sell encyclopedias, cookbooks and bibles door-
to-door in the U.S.
To get lots of money you work 14
hours a day, six days a week for 13
straight weeks. Gross earnings of
U.S. $4,000 minus expenses of U.S.
$1,500 gives net earnings of U.S.
$2,500 for 1,092 hours of work.
Therefore, the hourly wage
would be $2.29 using their data.
Jesus Christ, McDonald's pays
$3.65 in Vancouver.
Oh, I almost forgot, you must
drive to Nashville, Tennessee to
pick up the books and receive some
sort of intensive training. You are
told you need only bring $250 to get
there and spend a week there.
Credits of 1 V2 units at UBC have
been promised. This is a fucking lie.
The Commerce Undergraduate So
ciety has not heard of them or the
commerce credit scheme. No credits
are given.
The reps? are smooth-talkers, but
liars. Don't sign any contracts; just
give them the fuck-off. We are intelligent   university   students,   not
stupid idiots.
The Moonies are also slick in obtaining members to make money
for them. Think about it. Complain
to the UBC administrators now.
Gary Cleven
arts 1
Unclassified God speaks
In response to Richard (allow me
to call you Dick) Wong (Wait, believe in Jesus! March 26).
Dick you suffer from delusion.
Jesus is not Lord. I am. I have prayed to God, and when I do I hear a
voice. The voice I hear is my own. I
am God.
What is more Dick, I don't give a
shit about this world you inhabit,
not to mention your petty concerns.
"Why am I in the dumps?" you
ask. Because you're a superstitious
shmuck who continues to believe
there is eternal hope. Wake up pal,
the world stinks, and I intend to let
it rot.
Don't think a couple of million
starving kids in Africa are the result
of some accident. It's because the
Lord (me) doesn't give a damn. I
don't see your friend Jesus proving
too useful to the Ethiopians.
Of course a few ministries in a
higher tax bracket are working in
his name. But their wealth is a testament of their devotion to My corruption.
I offer you, Dick, these words:
get off your duff and use your
head. If you still don't get the point
I'd be glad to discuss things with
you. You can meet me anytime —
just go straight to Hell.
God
unclassified Friday, March 29, 1985
THE    UBYSSEY
Page 9
Wiseman bursts
ike penned zits
A lot of people think that g«srs are goofs. Wait, worse than goofs realy, mors «ke slimy slugs. Slimy
slugs that leave a foul sticky excretion behind them. Slugs that should be stepped on so thst their
green guts burst out from their stick tongue-tike skin ... On the other hand some people think gears
are goofs. And gears, what do they think? Wet! they think slugs'are kinds nice in a way.
From page 5
of "staff writer." At the age of 31,
he's already a veteran in local
magazine circles.
Wiseman aims to entertain and
not innundate the reader with
useless information (such as the
make of mixing board used by a
group on their last recording). His
material sticks out like a nose pimple ready to burst in the magazine's
sometimes less than eccentric pages.
But Wiseman claims he usually has
umn? Why, for instance, did
Wiseman pick Twisted Sister lead
singer Dee Snider to be a vietim-of-
the-month?
"Are you going to pass up a
chance to talk with a guy that's that
interesting, that's that powerful and
popular and also a helluva nice guy
just because he plays heavy metal?
That article was easy as hell to
write. I mean, just let old Dee roll,
he's ready to give you the best copy
you want.
rock'n'roll: "Don't be boring, say
something that matters, keep a firm
hand on your own self-indulgence
and do things for your audience
rather than for your own ego-
gratification.
• His current musical faves include The Bluebells, The Smiths,
True West, Lloyd Cole and The
Commotions, Aztec Camera,
Poisoned and D.O.A.
• Someday he may barricade
himself in a New York apartment
"Look at all the great novels, they're all about fucking and
fighting and people dicking around"
few problems getting his writerly
output past the hawk-like eyes of
the editors.
No, he does not lock them up in
his basement and put Twisted Sister
on at full blast until they capitulate.
"I think everybody here is
familiar with a lot of good writing,
and good writing doesn't preclude
humour or risque topics. I mean
look at all the great novels, they're
all about fucking and fighting and
people dicking around.
"If you've got who, what, when,
where and why and you can
embellish that with few tangential
jokes, then I don't think anyone
can dump on you for that."
To get a few tangential yuks out
of the Cramps, who are definitely
no laughing matter, he asked such
pertinent questions as "What's
your favourite flavor of Baskin-
Robbins?" "What drugs are you
guys on?" and "But what of
Michael Jackson?"
He says most interviewees find
merit in his technique of fishing out
personal details through seemingly
trivial interrogation. Not all sing
praises of glory about Wiseman's
unorthodoxy though.
An owner of a major hotel chain
once threatened to pull Vancouver
Magazine out of distribution at his
hotels because of the unusually
large number of expletives dotted
throughout one of Wiseman's
epics. The article in question — a
profile of Canadian rocker Kim
Mitchell — contained "35 fucks
and shits."
And then there was Terry Jacks.
Jacks rang up Wiseman after a less
than glowing rant was published
concerning Jacks' dubious musical
product. "He said I was ruining his
life and he couldn't concentrate in
the studio because people kept
phoning him up and saying, 'did
you see what they said about you in
In One Ear?'
"He called me a prostitute and he
just basically shit all over me."
Undaunted, Wiseman keeps
plugging away with his caustic commentary that sends bolts of fear into the hearts of public relations
types. I look forward to his upcoming reports from the field on the
Love Boat and new-wave wrestling
with sweaty palms. But what's this
heavy-metal drivel doing in his col-
RED LEAF
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"Besides, I'm getting to really
like heavy metal," he says with a
hoser-like chuckle. "I really like the
big show productions of groups like
Motorhead and the intensity and
kind of acknowledged dumbness of
groups like Kiss."
Some final words on Wiseman
for you collectors of inspired trivia
• He adheres to the following
tenets   of   what   constitutes   good
and write fiction.
• He is a member in good standing of the Farrah Fawcett fan club
and at one lowly point in his life, he
watched Charlie's Angels twice a
day.
• He occasionally wears a dink
cap. Why, pray tell, is it called a
dink cap? "Because there's a dink
underneath it."
m^MMW
PIZZA FACTORY
Traditional Greco Roman Cuisine
2630 Sasamat St.
(at 10th Ave.)
FREE
26 oz. Coca Cola
with any order over $8.00
IU /O   Urr any pick up order
FREE DELIVERY
Open 7 Day
A Week from 224-2417
4p.m. 224-2625
♦
Featuring Traditional Greek and Italian Cuisine
4510 W. 10th Ave. 228-9512 or 228-9513
Now Open For Lunch
Monday-Saturday
From 11 a.m.
And in addition to our participation in "Entertainment
'85" and "Solid Gold" Candia Taverna presents . . .
Monday and Tuesday Evenings are
Gold Entertainment Nights
when you and your guest can enjoy
1 Free Dinner Entree when a second dinner entree
of equal or greater *value is purchased.
No Coupons Required
FREE HOME DELIVERY
OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK
Mon.-Thurs.—// a.m.-l a.m.
Fri. and Sat. — // a.m.-2 a.m.
Sun. and Hoi. 5 p.m.-I a.m.
' 'Licensed Premises''
'Up to a $10 value
Announcing the winners of the
IffiHE
HAPPY
• !>
LQjjj3£fla£&a£Q&
Long Distance Contest
• Andrew Smith
University of Manitoba, Winnipeg, Manitoba
• Beth Consitt
Sheridan College, Brampton, Ontario
• Minnie Parsonage
Universite du Quebec, Trois Rivieres,
Quebec , -  -
m
$«;H%C
Congratulations to our winners. And
to all of our contest entrants, thank
you for calling long distance and
making someone happy.
Telecom    Canada
Alberta Government Telephones
B.C. Tel
Bell Canada
Island Tel, PEI
Manitoba Telephone System
Maritime Tel & Tel
NBTel
Newfoundland Telephone
SaskTel
Telesat Canada Page 10
THE    UBYSSEY
Friday, March 29, 1985
fo!A
('ltf&ti
TODAY
GAYS AND LESBIANS OF UBC
Bzzr garden, 3:30 p.m. to 7:30 p.m., SUB 205.
UBC MOTORCYCLE CLUB
No beer garden tonight, ad was screw-up, sorry
for any inconvenience.
AMS ART GALLERY
Art education print sale, last day, 10 to 4 p.m.,
AMS art gallery.
STUDENTS FOR PEACE AND
MUTUAL DISARMAMENT
Film: The Edge of History, noon, SUB 205.
PSYCHOLOGY STUDENTS' ASSOCIATION
Ticket sales for March 30 graduation dinner and
dance,     11:30    a.m.-noon,     Buchanan    near
advisor's office.
LE CLUB FRANCAIS
Meeting  regarding final dinner,  noon.  International House.
SATURDAY
UBYSSEY SCHOOL OF COMMITTEES
Meeting  for  national  conference,   1   p.m.,   No
5-1110 Victoria
SUNDAY
UBC SCHOOL OF SOCCER
"The Contempt of Court  Bowl",   11  a.m.,  St.
George's Field.
DEPARTMENT OF MUSIC
Tom Hassou, composition, graduation recital, 2
p.m., UBC Music Building, recital hall.
LUTHERAN STUDENT MOVEMENT
Communion, 10 a.m., Lutheran campus centre,
MONDAY
UBC   JAPAN EXCHANGE CLUB
Organizational meeting for Vancouver program,
A p.m., SUB 237B.
STUDENTS FOR PEACE AND
MUTUAL DISARMAMENT
Organizing  meeting  for walk for peace,   noon,
SUB 212A
AMS ART GALLERY
Fourth  year  B F.A.   graduating  show,   10 to 4
p m,, AMS art gallery.
TUESDAY
DEPARTMENT OF OCEANOGRAPHY
Lecture/slide shows on an interdisciplinary
seminar in Greece, 10:30 a.m. and at 7:30 p.m.,
Biosciences 1465 and later at SUB 215
WEDNESDAY
UBC PROGRESSIVE CONSERVATIVE YOUTH
Scarborough centre Pauline Browes speaks on
"Universality", noon, SUB 212.
THE INTERNATIONAL ASSOCIATION FOR THE
EXCHANGE  OF  STUDENTS   FOR  TECHNICAL
EXPERIENCE
An information meeting, for all accepted IAESTE
'85 students,  noon,  International House board
room.
PANGO-PANGO (UNS) — Hairy
puce blorgs were shocked today by
the darkened appearance of Talkathon Worser.
Worser, during his daily blah
blah blah to the Daily Blah, stunned
blorgs with his tale of lying indoors
and still getting the sun. Daily Blah
reporters Snarly Diddledum and
Chris Beyond were confused and
asked Talkathon Worser when his
interview had been. Darth Victor
woere his Sunglasses.
Worser went on for half an hour
about his skin care and then denied
rumors that his appearance had
been changed by a fall into a garbage bin at Whistler a few years
earlier.
YUKON JACK ATTACK 5
The Walrus Bite.
Temper '/? ounce Tequila
with orange juice over ice.
rS  Fire in 1 ounce Yukon Jack
■^\  to give the Walrus its bite.
J\_ And you thought
"*     Walruses didn't have teeth,
(tusk, tusk, tusk). Inspired
in the wild, midst the damnably cold, this, the black
sheep of Canadian liquors, is
Yukon Jack.
Mxkonjack
The black sheep of Canadian liquors. Concocted with fine Canadian Whisky.
Graduate Studies in Anatomy
and Cell Biology
The Department of Anatomy at the University of
Saskatchewan offers graduate programs for the M.
Sc. and Ph. D. degrees. Students may specialize in a
variety of areas including neurobiology, molecular
cytogenetics, developmental biology, human locomotion, or muscle biology. The department has modern
well-equipped laboratories and specializes in the
use of tissue culture approaches to biological problems. Graduate Students may receive support
through University scholarships or research grants.
For further information please contact:
Chairman of the Graduate Program
Department of Anatomy
University of Saskatchewan
Saskatoon, Saskatchewan        S7N 0W0
SIDEWALK SEMINAR II
When the factor of pomp, pageantry and patriotism is combined
with the function of developing and executing policy, as in President
Reagan, we have an elected dictatorship. Just as in Russia. And as
rigid as that P1 the presidency of Abraham Lincoln.
Political Science faces the same conditions as did Medical Science
before Lord Lister revealed the cause of surgical infection. His fellow
surgeons were appalled at his suggestion that surgeons were the
major cause of surgical deaths from infection.
Political Scientists assert America to be a triumph of Democracy and
the institution of Royalty effete, irrelevant, and out of date.
What a shock to have to admit that Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II is
the bastion of Democracy and President Reagan the epitome of
autocracy.
NO VAPORIZATION
WITHOUT REPRESENTATION
A dual citizen
Paid Political Advertising •••••
WE MAKE
COPIES
PEOPLE
SWEAR BY,
NOT AT !
Copies • Binding
Passport  Photos
Save
SCUBA ON CAMPUS
Aqua Society has been UBC's SCUBA club for
almost 30 years. It has grown to a complete
diving centre offering student-affordable
— Courses
— Rental Gear nrln*:
— Equipment Sales
— Trips
— Free Air Fills
Explore the fascinating underwater world with
Aqua Society! Spring & Summer courses now
filling.
H
AQUA SOCIETY
University of British Columbia
Rm. 111
Student Union Building
Tel.: 228-3329
Open Mon.-Fri.
11:00 A.M. to 7:00 P.M.
I
I
STUDIO |
Free Graduation Photo Session   I
This is your invitation to have a guest sitting and see a complete ^
selection of colour previews without cost or obligation. This offer <
is valid to all 1985 UBC graduating students Phone now for an ap- ?
pointment, 736-7281 or 731-1412. '
2111 West 16th Ave., Van., B.C.
Offer good until May 30th
th
THE CLASSIFIEDS
RATES: AMS Card Holders — 3 lines, 1 day $2.50; additional lines, .60c. Commercial
1 day $4.50; additional lines, .70c. Additional days, $4.00 and .65c.
Classified ads are payable in advance. Deadline is 10:30 a.m. the day before publication.
Publications, Room 266, S.U.B., UBC. Van., B.C. V6T2A5
Charge Phone Orders over $10.00. Call228-3977
3 lines.
COMING EVENTS
AMS
ART GALLERY
SUB, Mon.-Fri., 10-4 p.m.
4th Year B.F.A.
Graduating Show
Apr. 01-Apr. 12
1st Year M.F.A. Show
Apr. 15-Apr. 26
THE VANCOUVER
INSTITUTE
Free Public Lecture
Saturday, March 30
Michael McCrum
Cambridge University
on
ELITISM,
EGALITARIANISM
AND EXCELLENCE
Lecture Hall 2, Woodward
Building at 8:15 p.m.
CREATE YOUR OWN CAREER
INVESTOR SEEKING
BUSINESS TALENTS
Investor provides capital to students with
business ideas for creation of long-term
businesses. We take the risk. Submit proposal and resume to P.O. Box 46, Thor-
nhill, Ontario, L3T3N1.
Applications are now available
for Phys. Ed/Athletic Supervisors wanting work evenings/weekends, Sept. '85-April
'86. Pick-up in Rm. 208, War
Memorial Gym.
85 - TYPING
40 — Messages
11 - FOR SALE - Private
NISHIKI Landau 12 sp., men's, alloy whls,
front Er r. detach, lights, $300 obo.
591-3267.	
15 — Found
BLACK & WHITE female collie near/around
Main Library last Tuesday, March 19. To
claim call Brian, 271-8537.
25 - INSTRUCTION
LSAT. GMAT. MCAT preparation. Call
National Testing 738-4618. Please leave
message on tape if manager is counselling.
LET US PREPARE YOU FOR THE
OCTOBER 5. 1966 LSAT
on September 13. 14. 15/1986.
For information call free
LSAT/GMAT Preparation Courses,
112-800-387-3742.
PIANO LESSONS by Judy Alexander, graduate of Julliard School of Music. Near Cam-
bie & 38th. 731-8323.
To my daughter
wherever you are —
I hope that you're happy
in your home near or far,
I hope you've found freedom
to follow your star.
I hope you've found love
to brighten your way.
Though my empty arms cry
to hold you today—
And I search
the desolate streets
of my dreams
Longing for you.
Happy Birthday!
With Love,
Your Birth Mother
(March 29, 1966, at
St. Vincent's Hospital)
Box 403, 810 W. Broadway,
V5Z 4C9; or contact
Canadian Adoptees Reform.
50 - RENTALS
OUTDOOR   EQUIPMENT   RENTALS   on
campus. You can rent tents and other
backpacking equipment, mountain bikes
and kayaks, all at great daily, weekly and
weekend rates from Rec UBC. Call
228-4244 for infor. or drop by the cage in
osbourne, Unit 2: 1:00 p.m.-5:00 Fridays or
Monday afternoons.
DOTS WORD PROCESSING offers reason
able rates for students for term papers,
essays & masters. 273-6008 eves.
UNIVERSITY TYPING-Word processing.
Papers, theses, resumes, letters. P-U &■ del.
9 a.m.-11 p.m. 7 days/wk. 251-2064.
WORD PROCESSING IMICOM). Student
rates $14/hr. Equation typing avail. Fast
professional service. Jeeva, 876-5333.
WORDPOWER - Editing & word processing professionals. Thesis, term paper,
resume & form letter specialists. Student
rates. 3737 W. 10th (at Alma). 222-2661.
WORD    PROCESSING    SPECIALIST.    U
write, we type, theses,  resumes, letters,
essays. Days, evgs/wkends. 736-1208.
EXPERT TYPING. Essays, term papers,
factums, letters, mscpts., resumes, theses.
IBM Selec. II. Reas. rates. Rose 731-9857.
YOUR WORDS professionally typed - to
go. Judith Filtness, 3206 W. 38th Ave.,
263-0351 (24 hrs.) Fast and reliable.
MINIMUM   NOTICE:
224-1342 (24 hours).
Essays   &  resumes.
70 - SERVICES
YOUR DEADLIKE approaches but draft
No. 47 is still not quite right? Don't despair!
Experienced editor will polish term papers,
theses, etc. Other services also available.
Contact Footnotes Information Er Research
Service, 430-5751.
30 - JOBS
JOIN NORTH AMERICA'S fastest growing
nutrition company. Many earning in excess
of $5000/mo. Call 278-7222.
THE UNBELIEVABLE herbal weight loss
program. No hunger pains. Safe & easy.
278-7222.
80 - TUTORING	
EXP. TUTOR - Math., physics, call Alexis,
734-2113 before 10 a.m. or after 10 p.m.
WORD WEAVERS - Word processing,
stud, rates, fast turnaround, Bilingual.
5670 Yew & 41st. 266-6814.
TYPING: Professional presentations for
proposals, resumes, etc. Competitive rates.
734-0650 (24 hrs.).
WORD PROCESSING SERVICES. Spell
ing, grammar expertise. Days, nights,
weekends. Call Nancy 266-1768.
PROFESSIONAL TYPING. 25 yrs. exper-
ience. Reasonable, accurate, fast. Phone
Richmond, 271-6755.
TYPING (t W/P: Term papers, theses,
mscpt., essays, incl. reports, tech. equa.,
letters, resumes. Bilingual. Clemy,
266-6641.
TYPING—fast, accurate. Reasonable rates.
734-8451.
NITELINE SERVICES word processing.
Theses typing, resumes, etc. Stud, rates.
Avail, eves., wkends. 430-6969, 437-9262.
WORD PROCESSING by Adina. Discount
for all student work. 10th Er Discovery.
Phone 222-2122.
NORTH VAN. Fast, careful, reliable. Exp.
all areas of academic typing. New electronic. 985-4929/985-5157.
YEAR AROUND EXPERT essay, theses
typing from legible wk. Spelling/gram, corrected. 738-6829. 10-9 p.m. K. Ed bus rte.
FAST,   ACCURATE   TYPING   SERVICE.
editing  included.   Reasonable  rates.   Call
Rachel, 731-1970. Friday, March 29,1985
THE    UBYSSEY
Page 11
HpVL£6
Family Matters: Sherman Snukal's new
play, previews from April 3, at The Arts Club
Theatre Granville Island, Mon.-Fri., 8:30 p.m.
Sat. at 6:30 & 9:30 p.m.
Circulation: A Theatre Repere's production
performed consecutively in French, English,
and in movement, at the Firehall Theatre April
2-6, at 8:30 p.m.
Fefu: and herfriends, directed by D.D. Kugler
Mar 27-31 at 8:00, 1885 Venables, free by invitation only, phone 254-1555 for invitations.
Cages: a combination of two one act plays
Snowangel and Epiphany by Lewis Carl
Carlino, at Deep Cove Stage, 2151 Panorama
Dr. Mar. 27-30, April 3-6 at 8:00 p.m.
Piaf; her song, her loves, returns to City
Stage, 751 Thurlow St. until April 20, Tuesday through Saturday 8:00 p.m.
"Chicago": A musical Vaudeville by Bob
Fosse & Fred Ebb, at Presentation House 333
Chesterfield Ave. April 4-13 at 8:00 p.m.
The School for Scandal: The Vancouver
Playhouse, until April 20, 8 p.m.
Sex Tips for Modern Girls: has moved from
Touchstone Theatre to the Arts Club at the
Seymour St. theatre until April 20, Mon.-Fri.
at 8:30 p.m., Sat at 6:30 & 9:30.
Martin Guderna: surrealist, at Pitt International Galleries, 36 Powell St. until April 6.
Arcade: A post McLuhanesque Exhibition by
Lorna Mulligan until April 6 at the Pitt.
The Dog Observed: Photographs 1844-1983
at Presentation House 33 Chesterfield Ave.
until April 28.
Susan Loudon and Doug Rowed: until
April 28 at the Surrey Art Gallery 13750 -
88th Ave.
City Shapes: public viewing of the maquet-
tes of the ten finalists for the Vancouver
Centennial Sculpture Symposium, at Cartwright Street Gallery, Granville Island, April
4-28.
Vancouver East Cinema (7th and Commercial, 253-5455) Diva and Repo Man, Mar.
29-31, 7:30 and 9:30 p.m.; Forbidden Games
and Rules of the Game, Apr. 1-2, 7:30 and
9:15 p.m.; Women in Love and Last Tango
in Paris, Apr. 3-4, 7:30 and 9:50 p.m.
Subfilms ISUB Auditorium, 228-3697)
Revenge of the Nerds, Mar. 29-31, 7 and
9:30 p.m.
Ridge Theatre (16th and Arbutus, 738-6311)
El Norte, 7 and 9:30 p.m.
Pacific Cinematheque Pacifique (1616 W.
3rd, 732-5322) The Eyes, The Mouth, Italian
political cinema continues. Mar. 29, 7:30
p.m.; I Could Go On Singing, featuring
Sans Soleil, Les Astronautes, and La
solitude du Chanteur de Fond, Apr. 3-4,
7:30 p.m.
ARTS CLUB REVUE THEATRE
A Musical Evening
THE MELLOYDS
and
HEATHER GAYLE
Sunday, Mar. 31, 8 p.m.
Info: 687-1644
YORK UNIVERSITY/FINE ARTS
**<!<
Italy •Toronto
La La La: World Premiere of "Human Sex",
described as a highly physical dance in evolution, at the Vancouver East Cultural Centre,
1895 Venables St., April 3-6. 8:30 p.m.
Special Delivery: Dance/music/theatre, at
the Firehall Theatre, 280 E. Cordova, Mar.
28-30, 8:30 p.m.
Concert Group: Joffrey Ballet Centre performs four performances only at the Richmond Gateway Theatre, Mar. 29-31 at 8:00
p.m.
• Am &4t
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• Unique travel-study courses offered for full university credit in Rome and Florence, Italy, on
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• On campus in Toronto: day-time and evening
courses offered May-August in: dance technique;
film/video production/writing; jazz performance,
music for TV and film; movement and improvisation; design, graphics, painting, drawing.
'^Grr^ti^
Master of Fine Arts degree in Dance, Film/
Video, Music, Theatre, or Visual Arts; Master
of Arts in Art History.
Included: studio art programs in design, painting,
sculpture, photography, printmaking, drawing,
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film studies.
# For further information on Fall undergraduate and
graduate programs, and Summer courses, contact:
Room 206S, Faculty of Fine Arts, York University,
North York, Ontario M3J1P3 • (416) 667-3237
Hu>uc
Wind Ensemble and the VCC Madrigal
singers: King Edward Campus, 1155 E.
Broadway, Mar. 29.
The Eurogliders: from Australia, at the Commodore Ballroom, Mar. 29.
Rent A Mountain
Bike This Weekend
or a tent,  sleeping bag, stove,  kayak, gaiter,  pannier,
roofrack,    rainsuit,    hiking    boot,    sleeping    pad,
backpack . . .
Miyata   Mountain   Bikes  in  three
sizes     for     $10.007day     or
$19.00/weekend plus great prices p^pp
on   lots   of   other   great   outdoor
stuff.
The rental shop is located in the cage
in Osborne Gym Unit 2 out near the
skating rink. It's open 1-5 p.m. Fridays.
Drop by and pick up a price list or rent
something for the weekend.
Phone 228-4244
Fi
Schniing
te
FFI
Physical
Education
-   Facility
Supervisors
WANTED
for evening/weekend work
September '85 - April '86
Applications now available
Rm 208 War Memorial Gym
After you've gone down the slopes for the last time in the day, remember
the sensation of the snow-filled wind in your face with Hiram Walker Schnapps.
Its cool, minty flavour is as refreshing as a spray of snow.
HIRAM WALKER SCHNAPPS.
WHAT A DIFFERENCE A NAME MAKES. Page 12
THE    UBYSSEY
Friday, March 29, 1985
Meares part of Canada's heritage
By RICHARD POWYS
Part of any country's ability to stand proudly in the turmoil of the technological
eighties, where appeals for common sense are
often steamrolled by short-sighted power, lies
in its cultural and natural heritage and the
importance with which these are regarded.
Canada is extremely rich in both these
assets. The natural surroundings to be found
here must surely rank as some of the finest in
the world, and the population contains a rich
diversity of people.
This provides those who crave variety in
literature, food, religion, history and art, or
those who enjoy the "Super Natural" with a
wealth of knowledge and enjoyment
available to them.
Unfortunately, the stresses and strains of
modern life, the recession, the unemployment, the sense of being a small cog in a big
machine often generate a feeling of apathy.
We tend to concern ourselves blindly with
our problems and often assume that causes
perspectives
we see in the media are beyond the realm of
our influence.
Those of us who are honest with the world
and with ourselves must admit that this
"disease" is epidemic in our society. Far be it
from me to decry these reasons as trivial, they
are real, important and must be faced by
everyone.
But problems require solutions and solutions can be helped from a supply of sources
available to us. Part of these are the environmental and cultural heritages of the
country in which we live.
Leisure time allows us to enrich our lives
and draw upon help for our problems from
the environment and culture that surrounds
us. Who has not found pleasure or peace of
mind from a walk in the hills or found fresh
ideas from another's point of view?
Unless more people shake off their apathy
Meares Island will be logged. Not only will a
part of this country's cultural and natural
heritage vanish but a golden opportunity to
stand up against those who exploit apathy
will be lost too.
We went to Meares a few weekends ago
and what we saw was a revelation. It allowed
us a first hand glimpse of the heritage that
this country has but still prepared to let a few
people to destroy.
Travelling across Vancouver Island we
passed through bare mountainsides stripped
of trees and left covered with shattered
stumps and rotting wood amongst which a
few "christmas trees" struggle to survive.
A cycle of life that takes hundreds of years
to establish, which requires a succession of
trees from alders through Douglas fir and
which requires soil derived from years of
natural conditioning, has been destroyed.
The planting of "christmas trees" is a
cosmetic attempt to cover this devastation.
The main road from Parksville to Tofino
has been carefully designed to deceive. There
are surely logged areas, but there is also
Cathedral Grove, generously left by the loggers to be part of the heritage of this province.
But the timber was over mature and has
some disease in it, had it not been so old and
'"arthritic"   it   would   have   been   flattened
along with the rest.
It serves to satisfy the travellers curiosity
though. In an easy 10-20 minute walk from
their car the tourist can see what the old trees
look like and this instills the satisfaction of
knowing that there is still a place where the
trees, that once covered the whole island, survive. Its ok, your heritage is safe, let's get on
with the camping trip.
Elsewhere on the road the "christmas
trees" serve to create the impression of thriving nature. Ignore the signs barring the entrance to the logging roads, travel up into the
hills on each side of the main road and no
such covering exists. Out of sight of the main
road destruction and desolation hits you full
in the face.
Where has common sense gone? Here
where logging is obviously an important
aspect of the economy, where millions of
dollars are spent on forestry research and
where communities depend on its existence.
Ideas of selective logging that does not
totally destroy nature's balance, ideas of
more intensive aftercare to logged areas
which might aid recovery, these are shunned
Elephant's ear fungus and moss,
part of B.C.'s West Coast history
in the race for maximum profits.
The appeals of people left behind by the
recession to struggle with unemployment
amid the stench of the pulp mills of
Squamish or Port Alberni should not be
cries of anger against those who appeal for
conservation and competent management.
While driving along that road the words of
Zimmerman, the chair of Macmillan Bloedel,
when interviewed in his Toronto office by the
CBC for the Sunday Morning News kept
ringing in my ears.
What arrogance it must take to sit there
and say that tourists to the west coast are not
going to appreciate Meares since by the time
they have driven there they will have become
accustomed to logged areas and one more
will not matter.
To sit there and say that the people of
Tofino should not worry since logged or not
the island will still be there, the character of
Browning Passage will not change.
We went to Heelboom Bay, whose name is
a legacy of earlier small scale logging operations on the island and which is at the western
side of the first cutting licence assigned to
MacBlo. From there, people who live there,
have made a trail through the forest up
towards Mosquito Harbour.
It is a hard walk over naturally fallen trees
covered in moss and taller than a man, that
are slowly rejuvenating the soil, down slippery slopes and around trees that have been
there since before Europeans first arrived in
this land.
To walk through it with all your senses
tuned to absorb, is to really experience part
of the bounty that nature has to offer and to
encounter the peace of mind that such a place
can bring.
Macmillan Blodel wants Meares Island.
They want not just the first cutting licence
but the whole thing. A CBC reporter from
The Journal, who had just interviewed the
loggers, told us that in his opinion they
would prefer to be given a free hand with the
demonstrators. They feel that their cause is
justified and that their methods of imposing
their will would be effective and fast, but undoubtedly violent.
However the powers that be in the company, who are shrewd in the meandering of
public opinion and who realize with unfaltering devotion the strength of money, are
prepared to play the waiting game.
So confident are they in their cause that
they let the court battles run, the appeals
move back and forth, the public meetings
form and dissolve. They know that they will
win; after all, dollars, jobs and the well being
of people are involved!
They know that wielding the edicts of law
from judgements of provincial and federal
courts people will say "oh, it must be all
right", will turn over to the next page in their
newspaper and carry on munching their corn
flakes, happy that one more problem in the
world has been solved.
They know that people will soon forget in
the bustle- of life in the eighties,  thai  yet
another part of their natural heritage has
been decimated and reduced to shattered
lifeless stumps.
They must be pretty smug in their offices
in Toronto and Ucluelet. By God, what a
nice feeling it would be to shake them out of
that satisfaction by showing them that all
these things they know can no longer be
taken for granted, that their "upstanding"
role in society and the devastation that it has
caused will no longer be accepted.
We were treated to more than a glimpse of
this natural beauty in our trip to the island.
We were also privileged to experience some
of the cultural heritage under threat by the
felling of the trees.
We talked with and listened to Dan David,
one of the elders of the Clayoquot Band,
while his wife showed us how to steam clams
in a pit of hot stones covered with branches
of salal berry bushes.
We heard native songs about the trees,
about greeting and saying good-bye and
about the clams that we were eating, chanted
to the beat of deer skin drums.
We saw canoes being carved out of fallen
cedar logs whose graceful lines spoke of the
care with which they had been carved and of
the skills and designs passed from generation
to generation in a culture that must surely
rank foremost in the heritage of Canada and
that has also been devastated by the modern
world.
To the Indians of the Browning Passage,
Meares Island is a sacred place. It is a place
where they can still retain some of their
culture which is so strongly based on nature.
Here there are legends, burial sites and an
insight as to how the lore of their culture
came about. Archaeological sites too, are
plentiful on the island.
To say that the native cultures of the west
coast are based on nature in an understatement. The roots of these people are as deeply-
bedded in the loam of the forest floor as
those of the great trees. Like the trees, these
roots too are ripped up by the chainsaw and
the modern world that those machines represent.
Indian lore was attuned to nature as a
provider, as a source of inspiration in the antics of wildlife, as a harvest that properly
cared for and respected would give
sustenance, both of a material and mental
kind, without end.
Again no honest person can say that the
Indians have not been devastated by modern
times. Shut up on reservations, confined by
laws, dragged into the twentieth century by
poor education which involved none of the
natural roots of their survival and left to
watch as those same roots were torn up in the
destruction of the forests.
Anyone who has visited the Museum of
Anthropology at UBC or the Provincial
museum in Victoria, has benefited from this
culture. You have been privileged to a glimpse of another way of life very different from
the supermarkets, fast cars and hubub that
we have created for ourselves.
Yet this culture is not a museum piece like
some extinct bird'or stuffed animal. It is alive
and out there still, weak and feeble but still
proud and in desperate need of places like
Meares Island. There, some of its seeds can
fall and grow in land as it was, in forests
from which its whole heritage is derived.
We were moved in Heelboom Bay by Dan
David and his wife, by Joe Martin and Alvin
Nelson. There amongst the forest they showed us some of the richness, sensitivity and
feelings that are still alive and from which we
could all derive benefit and inspiration in our
struggle to live in the world of the eighties.
Meares Island represents a place where the
rot can be stopped, where people can say no
and in saying so can guarantee profits far in
excess of those few dollars in the pockets of
Macmillan Bloedel, profits which can be
shared by everyone and enjoyed.
Meares Island is part of the heritage of this
country, its survival depends on your willingness to make your voice heard, that you
will not let your heritage be raped by avarice.
If you stand behind a shield of apathy then
part of this country and part of you will die a
horrible death.
Write letters, attend meetings, tell your
local politicians, it takes so little time, above
all go to Meares Island, wall in the forest,
meet the people, then you will understand.
Powsy is a graduate student who wants to
keep B.C. beautiful.

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