UBC Publications

UBC Publications

UBC Publications

The Ubyssey Dec 2, 1989

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 the Ubyssey
VOLUME 71, Number 24
Vancouver, B.C. Friday, December 2,1988 Classifieds
Rates: AMS Card Holders - 3 lines, $3.00,
additional lines60 cents, commercial-3 lines,
75 cents. (10% Discount on 25 Issues or
more) Classified ads payable In advance.
Deadline 4:00 p.m,. two days before publlcal-
ton.   Room 266, SUB, UBC, Van., B.C. V6T
DANCE FOR TREES in support of Trek for
Trees! Live African dancing and dance! UBC
Asian Centre Dec. 10 8 pm. Sponsored by
Community Forestry for Africa Network.
Tix $4/$3 ph 874-2326.
DGW Marvel and DC Comics, up to 25% ofT.
Prompt Delivery for X-Mas, write or phone
The Comic Broker PO Box 2630 New Westminster V3L 5L2, 526-6353
complete from $1549.00. We match any
advertised price for comparable systems.
Inquire about AT Compatibles. 939-7888,
1975 CHEV MALIBU CLASSIC like new,
93,000 original miles, well maintained.
TORONTO Male leave Dec. 15, Return Jan.
4 $360 obo 291-2201.
ENERGY BOOST! Delicious, nutritious,
easy-drink for quick meal, weight/muscle
gain, weight loss. 3 flavours, injuice or milk.
Call Margo 583-2498.
RETURN AIR TICKET for sale (female).
Vane, to Calgary Dec. 21 (7:30) Dep. Jan. 1
(9:35) Ret. Kelly: 738-9922, 228-3547.
NORDICA SKI BOOTS, Black, Ladies, Size
9 $40. Kneissel Skis, Blue Star, 170 cms,
Salomon 626 Bdg., $50. Jo: 732-3857.
VISITING TORONTO? Bed & Breakfast in
our restored home minutes to the University
ofToronto and downtown. Rates from $40.00
30 - JOBS	
Part Time
$400-$700 plus per month
Work From Your Home
Call Mr. Barnes 687-3972
for medical ofSce on Broadway. Flexible hrs.
$5.76/hr. 224-7769.
HERBALIFE Independent distributor, call
me for products or opportunity. Margo 583-
P/T COMPUTER SALES. Must have good
communication skills. Exp. pref, not necessary. Frank 939-7888.
EARN $75 TO $125 PER DAY
And have fun doing it. We are now taking
applications for highly motivated people to
work immediately through Christmas season. Flexible hrs. & locations. 879-1655.
MESSAGE OF ISLAM 7: Faith consists of
knowledge and belief. It is meant by knowledge the recognition ofthe unity of God, His
prophet Mohamad and Islam supported by
evidence from Quraan and the deeds of
Mohamad, the last messenger.
Highest quality digital sound
♦For any occasion*
Well beat any price
MONTH. Free Delivery and pick up. All
recent electric models. Very low rates. Call
anytime 682-1535.
60 - RIDES
RIDE NEEDED TO CAL., leaving Van. Dec.
20 or 21. Will share gas and driving. Also
ride needed back to Van. on Jan. 1 or 2 from
Edm. or Cal. Call 874-4294.
WORD PROCESSING, $2.00/dbl. sp. page,
MLA, APA, CMS, editing. ComputerSmiths,
3724 West Broadway at Alma, 224-5242.
WORD WEAVERS - still on 41st bus line.
New location #101 - 2258 W. 41st Ave. at
Yew St. Excellent student rates for quality,
custom word processing, aussi en francais.
Tel. 266-6814.
A & Y Manuscript Masters
Specialists in scientific texts, graphs, grammar correction and style polishing. 253-
0899. Free pickup and delivery on campus.
$1.25/pg DSP Call Rob 228-8989 anytime.
WHY PAY MORE? Top quality word processing for students at guaranteed lowest
prices. Call 732-8074.
dale, 263-4862. Fast professional service.
Not.: "Noon" = 12:30 p.m.
word processing
Kelvin Douglas International
Economical Laser Quality
ACCURATE REPORTS word processing,
Word Perfect, laser printer, dictation, student rates avail. #16-1490 W. Broadway at
Granville 732-4426.
essays, theses. Discounts for students, 10th
and Discovery. Phone 222-2122.
WORD PROCESSING - Quality work at
reasonable rates. Downtown or Richmond
pick-up. Call Glenna 275-4326.
Accurate,   APA/MLA   experienced   laser
printed. Day Rate $1.50/pg, overnight 10 pm
to 8 am; 2.50/pg. Bookings accepted. Vivian
PAPERCHASE WORDPROCESSING, former college instructor, Inkjet printer, reports, resume, etc. Call 987-9699.
WORD PROCESS. USING WORDPERFECT. Quality Printer. Fast Service. Spec,
in German & Med. Terminology. Ruth 275-
Essays, theses, resumes done quickly and
accurately on laser printer. Competitive
rates 736-1517.
1^=^ E^^^ p*«^ E^^zm w^^^m
better marks. If your writing is less than
perfect, have your work edited. Call Katie
Taking a Vacation? ...
Take Off With
The only student travel
S.U.B. 228-6890
Preview of the new movie r-leases
for this festive holiday season.
4;3Q - -5 pm, CiTR 101,9 FM end
Cable FM.
Barrister & Solicitor
#203 - 4545 W. 10th Ave., 228-1433.
75 - WANTED	
WANTED Feb. 20-27. For fivestudents from
Ontario. Call 224-9098. Dave McConnell.
85 - TYPING	
word proc. & IBM typewriter. Studentrates.
Dorothy Martinson 228-8346.
YOUR WORDS professionally typed, fast &
reliable. Judith Filtness, 3206 W. 38th Ave.,
Typing, Editing, NO NOTICE REQUIRED, resumes. (Same day service).
Tapes transcribed. 224-2310 (Days), 327-
0425 (eves.).
Muslim Student Association.
Muslim Friday prayers, information and discussions about Mam<
For Non-Muslims. For mora information call 224-8590 or come to
LIL Noon, International House,
lower lounge-
Zen Meditation Society
Meditation, 3:30-4:30 pm. Grad
Centre Penthouse.
Lutheran Student Movement.
Advent Feast. 7-00 pm, Lutheran
Campus Centre.
English Students* Society,
Bzzr Garden. 4:30 pm - 7:30 pm.
Buchanan Lounge, (BITCH A200).
Orthodox Christian Mission.
Vespers. &;30 pm, St, Peter's Anglican   Church,   4580  Waldon
(Main & 30th), 27^3985.
Electronic Smoke Signals;
Human Rights Day feature.
Internationa] perspective on indigenous peoples and human
rights, Speakers from the Gitsken
Wetsowetan, World Council of
Indigenous Peoples, Union of BC
Indian Chiefs and Mayan Indian
Nation, $:$O*$:O0pm,CjTIUOlJ9
FM and Cable PM.
Orthodox Christian Mission.
3rd Sunday of the Nativity Fast -
St, Barbara, ftivine Liturgy, 9 am.
St. Peter's Anglican Church, 4580
Wi_ldon(Main & 30th), 275~29$5.
Lutheran Student Movement.
Communion Service, 10;00 am,
Lutheran Campua Centre.
Zen Meditation Society.
Meditation. 3:30 - 4:30 pm* Grad
Centre Penthouse,
CBAPSHOOT - Debate; Dean
(Liberal), Ken (Tory), Martin
<NDP}, -*od Kobin (libertarian).
Election results, free trade, and
general muck-raking. 5:30 - BiOO
pm,Ci'TEl.01.9FM and Cable FM,
Lutheran Student Movement
Co-Op Supper, 6 pm, Lutheran
Campus Centre.
MOVING  IMAGES   with   Ken
Mark DeRochers of the BC Film
Commission on why Vancouver is
a "hot property'. 4:30 - 5:00 pm,
CiTR 101.9 FM and Cable FM.
SUNDAY, Dec. 11
International House.
Annual   Children's   Christmas
Party. 12:30 - 2:30 pm, Internationa! House.
TUESDAY, Dec. 13
Christmas-oriented possibly po-
Utacal stuff. 3-4:00 pm, CiTR X01.9
FM and Cable FM.
MOVING  IMAGES   with   Ken
Helpful  hints  on  investing  in
Showbiz stock.   4:30 - 5:00 pm,
CiTR 101.9 FM and Cable FM.
MONDAY, Dec. 19
The Jaz_ Show
Recorded interview with one ofthe
most important post-Parker alto
saxophonists, Jackie McLean.
9:00 pm - 12:30 am. CiTR 101.9
FM and Cable FM** 1800 WATTS
■^fe_5^n 5^=^^ ^-^=^-1 {^^^ ^^^i i^i?::::^ ^^^-i (^^
Ess^_-_\ __^-__a b_^____i_ Efc=-__A E_^__^ta_^^_\__3L_^____%E_^-.
ARC needs writers
ARC, a U.B.C. undergraduate literary magazine published
for students by students that pro
vides a forum for student writing
from all departments, is still accepting short stories, essays, poetry and plays, along the theme of
"Heroes" for the 1988-89 issue
contest (general submissions welcome too). All submissions should
be handed in to the ARC letterbox
in Buchanan Tower 397 by January 3, 1989.
Contacts: Jon Derksen, 224-9927
Rob Sherwood, 263-5908
Students helping
Speakeasy is a subsidiary of
the AMS. It is a peer counselling
and information center located in
SUB room  100 B, and is open
Monday to Friday, 9:30 a.m. - 9:30
p.m. Trained Student Volunteers
can supply information regarding
social services, health and life
management, entertainment, current events and campus information. A tutor and typist registry is
available, as well as a peer counseling service. Peer counselling is
available on a drop-in or phone-in
basis. Something you want to
know? Just want to talk? Drop in
to Speakeasy SUB 100B. Or call
our peer counselling line (228-
3700). We .1 listen.
Psychology notice:
All grad portraits must be
taken   before   December   15th.
Graduation photographs and Free
Seatings are to be taken at
Evangelo's Photography (3156
W.Broadway, 731-8314). Grad
attire is provided. Graduation
applications must be in at the
Registrar's Office by Febuary
15th, 1989 for Spring Ceremonies
May 31, June 1 and 2. Grad dinner
at the Meridian Hotel Friday,
March 14th, 1989. TIX $35 before
Feb 10th and $40 after Feb 10th.
March 13th is the deadline for tix
refunds. 6-7 p.m. reception, 7-9
p.m. dinner, 9-1 a.m. dance. Seating arrangements can be made.
For more info call PSA office 228-
6147 or drop by the office 2007,
Kenny building.
Thesis terror?
Call the Walter Gage Test-
master Club. We're a part of
Toastmaster's International, a
world-wide speaking organization. Look collected and professional giving your thesis presentation.
Contact: Sulan, 224-9976
^7° Oscar's Donair & Pizza 15$
FOOD     .
ONLY     |
Donairs, Pizzas, Pastas, Subs, Nachos, Salads, etc.
Also, we have Regular and Dark on Tap '
Licensed Premises
2958 West 4th Ave. 2 blks west of MacDonald i
Phone: 737-8853 I
■f CO/ 15% off with this coupon (on min. $7.50 order) a co/ -
I %l /0 ah our menu items are without msg or preservatives (low fat and sodium I -3 /01
food content) and our pizza dough is made on the premises with unbleached flour Fqod I
ONLY Dine in and take out only.   7 per customer per visit ONLY i
I or
Become a UNICEF Volunteer
rea Martin
ress and Unicef Volunteer
December 2, 1988 NEWS
Strangway proposes
big tuition fee hike
By Laura J. May
President David Strangway
proposed a 10% increase in next
year's tuition to the Board of Governors Thursday.
"We have got to balance our
budget," he said, citing costs of
health and safety regulations,
employment equity, and Telereg
as reasons for the budget deficit.
AMS President Tim Bird
criticized the magnitude of the
proposed increase.
"10% is just out of line. An
acceptable rate in a lot of people's
minds is the rate of inflation—
three and a half to five percent,"
Bird said Thursday.
Bird presented an AMS report to the board "to back up the
fact we can't afford the increases.
UBC students have to contend
with one of the highest costs of
living in the country, one of the
highest tuition rates in the country, and one ofthe lowest financial
assistance programs. As a result,
B.C. has one ofthe lowest rates of
university participation in the
Keeping undergraduate tuition down is not a priority for the
university, according to Bird. "The
undergraduate fees have fallen to
one ofthe last priorities," he said.
"I feel that the university has
been pressuring the provincial
government for other priorities
than the undergraduate fees, such
as financial aid incentives for B.C.
graduate students and...graduate
research programs."
Strangway denied that keeping undergraduate fees down was
not important to the university
administration. "That's just utter
garbage. We're going after money
for every aspect ofthe university—
matching funds, buildings, an increase in operating funds."
He said undergraduate students were not competing with
Leeches police river
By Roger Kanno
Leeching is in vogue again.
But this time, they are being
used as "environmental police" to
monitor levels of chlorophenols in
the Fraser river by Dr. Ken Hall of
the Westwater Research Centre at
Chlorophenols are a group of
organic compounds used to treat
lumber to prevent sap stain fungus. Run-off from stored lumber
can be toxic to young fish because
of the presence of chlorophenols.
Hall said we should be concerned
about chlorophenols because they
are often associated with dioxins.
According to Hall, leeches are
good organisms to use to detect
chlorophenols because they absorb water in their tissues to extract oxygen and in doing so they
also absorb and concentrate chlorophenols.
"They can take chlorophenol
levels of parts per billion in the
water and concentrate them in
their tissues to parts per million in
a week," he said.
The reason leeches are used is
because they don't excrete the
chlorophenols that they absorb
said Hall. Fish can't be used because they have enzymes which
break down any chlorophenols
they may absorb.
The method for detecting
chlorophenols with leeches is similar to the conventional method of
testing water samples. "The only
difference," said Hall, "is that instead of using water samples, we
digest and cook up leeches."
"We just looked at chlorophenols, there is no reason why
leeches couldn't be used to detect
other organic compounds," said
Hall, although he stressed that
more work needs to be done.e
graduate students for funds. "It's
not one part of the university versus another."
Bird said the university
should be more aggressive in pursuing provincial funding.
"It's obvious that the university is going to have a tough time
finding the money elsewhere, but
the university is going to have to
get their act together, show some
initiative, and get that money
from the provincial government,"
he said.
Strangway said provincial
funding wasn't a problem: "the
province has been giving us increasing funds."
Geoff Lister and Bob Seeman,
the student representatives to the
Board of Governors, also spoke
against tuition increases at the
board meeting. They said tuition is
a symbol of how open and accessible a university is, according to
Bird. By increasing tuition 10%,
UBC would be sending a strong
message to the community that
UBC is not open to everybody, they
The Board of Governors will
vote on the proposed tuition increase at their next meeting on
January 26.
Student feedback on the proposed increase should be directed
to Tim Bird for presentation in the
next meeting, Bird said.
UBC student James Rokanas, missing since Monday.
Second student
goes missing
Police are baffled by the mysterious disappearance of a UBC
student from campus this week—
the second missing student in one
James Rokanas, 19, is a first
year science student and was last
seen walking to class at 8:30 a.m
on November 28.
"We don't have enough data
yet...to come up with a decent
theory," said Staff Sergeant Bob
Law, ofthe Vancouver City Police.
"All we know is that he very subtly
and mysteriously disappeared."
The police have not determined if the incident is related to
the disappearance a month ago of
Emerson Dobroskay, who is yet to
be found.
Law said Rokanas had
"strong family ties" and his disappearance was "totally out of character."
Rokanas is described as a
white male, 510", 200 lbs, with
short brown hair and brown eyes.
He was last seen wearing a
dark grey ski jacket, light grey
pants, and dress shoes and was
carrying a blue book bag.
Because Rokanas is a resident ofthe east side of Vancouver,
his disappearance is not being
investigated by the UBC branch of
the RCMP, who conducted the
search for Dobroskay.
Law said the UBC branch
would be consulted in the search.
"We're looking for some insight,
some theories," he said, adding
that "absolutely anything is possible."
Any information should be
directed to the Vancouver Police
Missing Persons Section 665-
$• -ife; _.	
-jr. -JfyPifi \   "^
Miniskirts and deckshoes are in at the North Pole this year,
December 2,1988
President David Strangway
congratulated students on their
decision to support the recreational facility in the November
"The fight was a good fight,"
he told the Board of Governors
"It was somewhat
controversial....but the vote was
unequivocal." Now students will
"participate fully in (the) capital
campaign," he said.
Awards for women in academic programs traditionally
dominated by women will be under review by the Senate.
A few awards do not fit the
Senate's criteria of having as few
restrictions as possible or of supporting minority and underrepresented groups, according to the
Board of Governors' Academic
The Delta Gamma Kappa
bursary provides $500 for women
in education. Since the education
faculty has 70% women, the Academic Committee questioned
whether this award could be considered affirmative action.
If the award were made more
restrictive—for women in math,
science, or industrial arts education programs, for example—then
the award might fit the Senate's
A final decision will be made
by the Senate.
"There's not enough building
material in the whole country to
repair the damage done by hurricane Joan," according to Murray
Reiss an official from Tools for
The 220 kilometre per hour
winds recently destroyed 90 percent of the houses on the Atlantic
Coast leaving 300,000 people
Since its beginning in 1981
Tools for Peace has shipped over
six million dollars worth of priority goods to Nicaragua.
Notebooks, pencils, shovels,
rakes and rubber boots are being
collected this year to help the
Nicaraguan people in education
and agriculture.
Collecting these goods "people
can plug into Tools for Peace very
directly," said Reiss.
There is also room for volunteers to work sorting and packing
in the warehouse or fundraising
selling calendars and organizing
Three Soviet Refusniks have
recently been adopted by the
World Jewry Committee of Hillel,
the Jewish Student's Association
at UBC.
The students on the board are
making an effort to help Mikhail
Koshorovsky, Slava Uspensky,
and Yanna Grauer emigrate from
the Soviet Union. Appeals are
being made to Soviet officials in
the Soviet Union as well as to
Soviet officials in Canada.
The students have also begun
communication with the Jewish
dissidents through letters and
To increase public awareness
of the Soviet Refusnik situation,
Hillel will provide educational
programs and lectures.
Thousands of Soviet Jews
have applied for emigration as a
result of their inability to publicly
maintain their Jewish identity.
Applications, however, are usually denied. It is the responsibility
of the Diaspora to help the Soviet
Jews emigrate from the Soviet
Union. Letters, petitions, and telegrams should be sent and it is
extremely vital that the Jewish
community is aware of the persecution inflicted upon them.
The students of UBC/Hillel
are hoping that their efforts will
lead to the release of the three
Soviet students. The denial to
emigrate is an example of discrimination; therefore, the work of
the students can only set a precedent for other individuals and
organizations to follow.
$399 London return
a truly inspired price.
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return when you book selected tours from Contiki,
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Simply choose from a Contiki Grand European,
European Adventurer or European Contrast holiday and we will fly you to London and back for $399.
Some restrictions apply-departure taxes not included.
Refer to Contiki's 1989 Europe brochure for booking details. Limited space available
Just visit your local Travel Cuts office and present
your student ID along with the deposit before
February 3rd 1989. Flight departure dates must be
prior to 12th May 1989 and this special cannot be
taken with any other offer.
Together Contiki and Travel Cuts make Europe
fun and affordable. For more inspiration see
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Going Your Way!
VANCOUVER 228-6890    BURNABY 291-1204    VICTORIA 721-8352
December 2,1988 NEWS
Defence defends nuclear subs
By Catherine Lu
Canada should purchase nuclear submarines because of
NATO commitments, not sovereignty, according to Colonel Malcolm MacLeod, director of public
policy from the Department of
National Defence.
"The whole focus has been too
much on the sovereignty issue and
not enough on the operational
capability ofthe subs in a standard
NATO scenario," MacLeod said in
a noon-hour lecture sponsored by
the Institute of International Relations last week.
The federal government's
1986 white paper on defence said
nuclear submarines would help
deter a nuclear attack on North
America by the Soviet Union.
MacLeod defended the white paper against charges that it was
mere cold war rhetoric and out of
phase with the present conciliatory mood in international politics.
MacLeod also defended
NATO's refusal to adopt the "no-
first use" policy regarding nuclear
weapons. "NATO relies on nuclear
weapons as a deterrent" because
the Soviet Union has such a huge
conventional force in Europe, he
McLeod argued that if NATO
renounced the ability to use nuclear weapons first, as the Soviets
have done, it would not be able to
successfully counter a Soviet conventional attack on Europe with
its weaker conventional force.
Nuclear weapons act as a deterrent or threat against possible
Soviet intentions to invade western Europe, he said, and to renounce the first use of nuclear
weapons would undermine the
whole policy of nuclear deterrence
in that region.
"We have to assume that
under certain circumstances, we
might be prepared to use them
first," he said.
Especially in Europe, "the
amount of hardware and military
capability on the other side...is
much more than we (NATO) assess to be reasonable for defensive
purposes," he said. "There is still a
very intimidating and offensive-
minded   (Soviet)   capability"   in
"However, we have never said
that we'd use force first," added
MacLeod. The Soviet Union has
not renounced the first use of conventional forces, he said.
"We view the developments in
the Soviet Union with guarded
optimism," he added, referring to
Soviet premier Gorbachev's recent
disarmament initiatives.
McLeod addressed concerns
that the subs would entrench
Canada in the US forward maritime strategy, which involves sealing off Soviet submarine bastions
in their holding waters to prevent
their use in a time of crisis. He
considered this possibility a "red
"That may or may not be the
case," he said. In peacetime, the
subs would be used for normal
coastal patrol and NATO surveillance activities. "If in hostility
they were required for the forward
maritime strategy, why not?" he
Arguing against the criticism
that diesel-powered subs would
suffice, McLeod said that nuclear
subs are far more capable and
"from a strictly military point of
view, a more effective weapons
MacLeod also dismissed concerns about safety and about harm
to the environment. He said "very
stringent" safety measures would
be put in place and environmental
standards would be enforced rigidly.
Why battle your way through Europe.
Travel Contiki.
Fighting your way through crowded European
stations from Waterloo to the Gare du Nord,
fruitless reconnaissance for a vacant hotel room
or route marching with a backpack can make
your vacation seem like an uphill battle. But not
with Contiki.
18-35 year olds have been experiencing Europe
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real soul of Europe, by yourself or with fellow
Contiki travellers from around the world.
On our tours you can live like a European in a
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If you're thinking of going to Europe this
summer, get Contiki's new brochure and video from your local
Travel Cuts office, it's half the battle.
Contiki gets you to the heart of Europe
with time to discover its soul.
December 2,1988
THE UBYSSEY/5 UBC Students, Staffand Faculty
Government Certified Mechanics
Repairs to all Makes and Models
Leave your car while at work or school.
2190 Western Parkway (behind the village)
224-1226    or 224-1713	
- $14.95 -
Bring this ad for $3.00 off oil and filter change
Most cars    Regular $17.95 Dec. 16/88
v.1", "_\".\
4   **
To provide uni\ ersitv graduates with an interest in public affairs an
opportunity to supplement their academic insights of the legislative
process with practical legislative and administrative experience.
Students who bv the program commencement date will have
received a degree trom a British Columbia University.
light interns are selected each year.
Parliament Buildings, Victoria, British Columbia
• WHEN •
lanuarv I to lune 3d, I'-WO.
si,400 month
l-cbruarv I, IA>SQ
Program literature and application tonus are available trom the
Political Science Departments, Offices of the Deans, and the Student
Fmplo\ ment Centres <>n Campus, at the University of Victoria,
Simon Fraser University, and the University of British Columbia or
from Ihe Ottice ot the Speaker, Suite 207, Parliament Buildings,
Victoria, B.C. VSV 1X4.
Image-conscious students check their "look"
TA union settles
By Deanne Fisher
After almost four months of
negotiations, UBC's teaching
assistants have come to a contract settlement with the administration.
The T.A.'s union has accepted a wage increase but was
not granted the tuition fee waivers they requested, according to
union president Larry Hannan.
"What we were looking for
was, of course, a wage
increase...and we wanted some
ofthe possible money to be available
in tuition fee waivers," said Hannan,
adding that many other universities
do not make teaching assistants pay
tuition at all.
A T.A. at UBC is paid $6070 a
year which will increase five percent
this year, five percent next year and
six percent in the third year of the
recently settled contract. Many are
also supplemented by research
grants or loans.
"We would have liked more than
five percent," said Hannan. "We
wanted a total package  that in-
What's hot in toys
By Jason Weickert
The big news in toys this year
is the resurrection of traditional
toys such as electric trains, toy
cars, and board games.
Toy companies are developing and promoting more traditional toys and higher retail
sales reflect their efforts. Of
course this doesn't means kids
actually want this stuff. It
seems most kids want army gear
or dolls that grow their own hair.
Other hot items this year
are micromachines, Ghost-
busters, G.I. Joe, and teenage
mutant ninja turtles.
On the other side of the coin,,
transformers and pro-wrestling
stars seem to be dying a slow and
painful death.
If you're looking to drop
some serious cash this year, you
might want to buy the "wisecracking" Alf for $55 or maybe the singing
jill doll for just over a $100.
Perhaps you've got someone
really special to buy for. In that case
try the G.I. Joe space shuttle for a
cool $170. As for the value of these
toys, Stanley Blank, professor of
psychology specializing in creative
educatii i, says parents should consider toys which encourage children
to play and share with others.
He highly recommends toys
which involve playing outside and
help the child to learn social skills.
Toys like ride-on cars and board
games are good ideas, says Blank.
If you haven't bought your toys
you'd better hurry—some items are
already sold out and others are getting harder to find.
We are proud to present, for the first time, the UBC Quartz Classic for fellow students
of our great university.
The UBC Quartz Classic features:
• the official UBC Coat of Arms on the dial for its exclusiveness
• High quality Swiss movement for its precision operations.
• Water resistancy for its durability.
• Matching Gentlemen's and Ladies' styles.
• Date function on the Gent's style.
• Standard one year warranty.
• Introductory price at $120 and $110 for Gent's and Ladies' respectively.
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+4.00 S&H
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eluded tuition fee waivers."
PhD students are currently
guaranteed some kind of aid for
three years but Hannan said the
union tried to get that funding extended for the fourth year. "It is
impossible to complete a PhD in
three years."
"Basically, if students are
assured that income, it makes it a
lot easier," said Hannan.
Hannan said this proposal
was turned down by the administration because he thinks the
university "wants to encourage
people to complete the program
The union did gain a "union
security clause" which means that
instead of having to solicit membership into the union, each new
T.A. automatically becomes a
member unless they give notice
And the administration has
shown some financial commitment to a low cost training program for new T.A.'s which Hannan
said will "train the T.A. in kinds of
duties they encounter."
"The university's lending
their name to (the training program) gives it an air of authority,"
said Hannan.
Hannan said the negotiations
"did not take an abnormally long
time", adding that the last T.A.
contract negotiations two years
ago took almost a year to resolve.
The administation's bargaining representative was unavailable for comment.
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Sexual harassment
policy not perfect
By Deanne Fisher
The faculty association still
has problems with UBC's new
sexual harassment policy, which
will come into effect some time in
the new year.
Harry Edinger, a professor of
classics involved in the negotiations over the harassment policy,
said the faculty association has
some "reservations of a rather
technical nature."
"We see some conflicts between the sexual harassment
grievance policy document and the
agreement on conditions of employment that the faculty association has with the administration,"
said Edinger.
Faculty association president
Joost Blom said there were "some
essential elements not included"
in the policy and that the policy
"does not protect the interests of
the faculty member (if the faculty
member is accused of sexual harassment)."
Alma Mater Society external
affairs coordinator Lisa Eckman
agreed that there may be a lack of
recourse for the defendent in a
case of alleged sexual harassment.
"There's no avenue for the respondent to go for advice," said Eckman. "We will probably improve it
so advisors can deal with both the
complainant and the respondent."
Eckman sits on a permanent
presidential committee responsible for implementing the policy
and choosing advisors. She would
like to see the faculty association
more involved in the processes
leading up to the implementation
ofthe policy and pointed out that
many of the complainants will
likely be faculty as well.
"There are a number of victims who are faculty—they're not
isolated from this incident," she
Eckman was one of only two
students who attended a recent
national conference on sexual
harassment in Winnipeg.
A study released at the conference reports that the main targets
of sexual harassment are female
graduate students (19.3 percent of
cases), followed by female staff
(17.3 percent) and female undergraduates (14.8 percent).
UVic protests Shell
VICTORIA(CUP)—A Shell Canada official said the
office was too cramped.
But a dozen picketers protesting a Shell recruitment drive at the University of Victoria
claimed a moral victory when the company moved
its interviews off campus at the last moment.
Said Shell official Peggy Flannagan, "We were
concerned about the comfort ofthe people we were
going to talk
to. The (Can- ^ ^«
ada  Employ-pX?i|*i
ment) offices
are        very
cramped."       .   ,,.
The dem- |j_£__
gathered in front of the offices of the Canada Employment Centre (CEC) to express opposition to
Shell Canada's parent company, Royal Dutch/Shell,
and its activities in South Africa.
But before the rally even began, organizers
were met by CEC employees and told that Shell had
arranged to meet elsewhere.
Flannagan said there was no connection between the planned demonstration and the move.
But CEC manager Inno Vatter thinks otherwise. He said Shell has always interviewed students
on campus in the past.
"As far as I know, Shell changed its mind
because of the protests."
Students still not using
condoms, says study
TORONTCKCUP)—Half of Canada's young people
are worried about catching AIDS, but only a small
minority use condoms regularly, a national study
"There are scary findings about the level of
sexual   activity   among   university   and   college
people," said Alan King, a professor at Queen's University and the principal author of the study about
youth and AIDS, which will be released December 2.
The study is based on a survey of 28,00012 to 21-
year-olds, including 6,000 university students.
The survey states that 75 percent of first-year
students have had sex within six months of starting
university. Fifteen percent have had anal sex at least
once in their lives.
Only half of all the students surveyed were
afraid of catching AIDS. Of those, only 12 percent of
males and 6 percent of females regularly use or insist
their partners
use condoms,
which can
ofthe disease.
Student drug & alcohol
report released
SUDBURY(CUP)—The next time you attend class,
look around for your peers. If you can't find them,
chances are they were boozing it up the night before.
In fact, 40 percent of Ontario university students
have missed a class because of a hangover, according
to a recently released report called The Drinking,
Drug Use and Lifestyle Patterns of Ontario's University Students.
The survey was answered by about 5,000 students at four provincial universities in the fall of
Almost 50 percent of respondents reported having a hangover in the last month, and 10 percent
thought they had a drinking problem. Thirty percent
of students are heavy drinkers.
Co-writer Louis Gliksman of the University of
Western Ontario isn't alarmed with the numbers.
"The alcohol consumption rate is lower than in
American universities. Our average is around 12
drinks per week. In American universities, the average is 15 drinks per week."
Canadian Pacific -H Hotels & Resorts
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Have a very merry and profitable Christmas, at Chateau Lake
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Experience musicians that shock. Relax before you
study. Come to The Ubyssey's Bzzr Garden to see
Sarcastic Mannequins
come ALIVE.
They have held critics speechless. Currently, they
hold a record of having the shortest review in The
Ubyssey's history: "Weird." What does this all
mean? Come to SUB 241K to find out.
Nadeane Holley
Thorne Ernst & Whinney Summer Student
The staff were great - their
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me learn was incredible.'9
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fey Robert Groberman
Gordon Lucas spent last
week sharing a stage with
some of Canada's most elite musicians, playing the Dance of the
Sugar Plum Fairy in the Nutcracker. Those same Victoria
Symphony musicians performed
Lucas's first symphony last year
and on December 11 will perform
the overture from the opera he is
Gordon Lucas
Last Sunday, he reviewed a
piano recital for The Ubyssey.
Gordon Lucas is a UBC PhD
student in Education, studying
curriculum instruction towards
producing a thesis on music
education curriculum. When he
is not working on this degree he
composes for and performs with
the Victoria Symphony.
He learned to play the accordion at the age of six, but "there
was not great music written for
the accordion." Intrigued by
great music, Lucas moved on to
the clarinet and piano, picking
up the violin in his early adolescence.
From his first original accordion chord, Lucas realized he
must be a composer.
"I was always writing," he
says. "Anything I picked up I
wanted to write for." To date he
has written chamber music, song
For three days only on Dec. 2, 3, 4, Community Sports wil be offering
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on Dec. 2,3, 4, 1988 at
3355 West Broadway
cycles and one symphony, all of
which have been performed.
Since attending UBC in the
mid 70s, when he acquired a
Masters degree in Music and a
teaching certificate, Lucas has
taught music in public schools.
He recently built an orchestra for
the Langley School District. He
played for a year-and-a-half in
the Toronto Symphony Orchestra, and last summer played with
the Los Angeles Philharmonic at
the Hollywood Bowl.
Lucas describes himself as a
"modern, classical composer," but
admits that "only an idiot would
try to make money at composition." He says that the money in
his field comes from writing film
scores, arrangements or orchestrations.
"That's not my bag...I'm a
composer," he states.
Lucas' first symphony, in
four movements, is twenty-six
minutes long and, for him, the
composing process was "emotionally draining." It took him three
weeks to write after having
worked it our in his head. He
writes at the piano.
Composing for an entire
orchestra involves an enormous
commitment on the part of the
composer both in time and in
energy. It also demands a thorough knowledge of all the instruments in the orchestra, and what
each is capable of. Lucas has a
working knowledge of these
The ability to compose music, according to Lucas, is a
combination of learned skill and
an inner creativity which cannot
be taught.
He learned the basics of his
art when, at the age of twelve, he
studied composition at UBC
under Cortland Hultberg.
"He was the reason I came to
UBC," Lucas says of the prof who
still teaches in the music
Lucas, who did not start
playing the violin until he was
14, wants to dispel the myth of
the musical prodigy. He says it is
not true that one must begin
music lessons at the age of nine
in order to become successful.
"We think that to be a good
violinist, you must start young.
That is not true." He describes
the musical prodigies who do
exist as "the Gretzkys of
music...Some start young and
continued on page 9
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continued from page 8
become great."
One of those young musicians, 16-year-old violinist Corey
Cerovsek has requested an
original composition from Lucas.
"He is a re-creative genius.
He's a world-class musician in a
16-year-old body," says Lucas of
the young violinist.
Using Cerovsek's receipt of a
degree in mathematics as an
example, Lucas was asked if
there is a connection between
music and math. Lucas answers
quickly: "The connection is a
Those hot young punks The
Scramblers are playing a benefit
for the Vancouver Food Bank at 86
Street, Friday, December 2. Tix $7
Another benefit concert, this one
for Point Robert Hurons, will feature Valdy, James Keelaghan,
and Sarah McLachlan. Boondocks Ballroom, tix $10 at VTC/
CBO or at the door
Pink Floyd Starlight: Pink
Floyd stuff in Dolby Omni-Q
sound, with special effects and
laser images—if you see it stoned,
don't Barf on the carpet. H.R.
MacMillan Planetarium 1100
Chestnut Street, for information
call 736-4431.	
Handel's Messiah—a Christmas
tradition with the Vancouver Cantata Singers, at the Orpheum, December 2nd and 3rd at 8.
myth," but then thinks about the
question again.
"The theoretics ofthe
physics of music are rather
mathematical...[but] the experience of music is more akin to
great painting...to art in general."
Lucas has now reached a
point in his maturation as a
composer where he destroys
what he has written if it does not
meet a standard he sets for
"I don't experiment any
longer...My experiments were
done in my student days," he
says, referring to the Masters
degree he earned in 1975.
In addition to having
completed the overture to his
And for the kids it's The Childrens' Messiah, also with the
Vancouver Cantata Singers, First
Baptist Church, 969 Burrard at
Nelson, December 10.
Festival of Lights ceremony
Vancouver Art Gallery
Thursday, December 8
7:30 to 8 pm
Looks Like  Rain,  Dear—har
har har. Vancouver Theatresports
League, should be pretty good.
From December 1st to 30th, at the
Back Alley Theatre, which is
downtown on Thurlow at Alberni,
near McDonald's.
Presentation House Open
House Christmas Party included jugglers, wandering actors,
Tallulah Zambone, The Four Calling Birds, plus a visit from Mr. and
Mrs. S. Claus.
Saturday, December 17,12-5 pm
opera, Lucas has just finished
work on his second symphony.
This one took eight months to get
down on paper. He thinks that it
is the best thing he has ever
written, but describes the
writing process of the fifty-
minute piece as "torture." The
symphony will be premiered in
December of next year by the
Victoria Symphony. Lucas is also
preparing a violin concerto at the
request of American Virtuoso
Daniel Heifetz.
In the meantime, Gordon
Lucas continues to work on his
PhD in education. He says that
he will not write another
symphony in the near future, but
it is doubtful that means he will
not be busy.
Vancouver's sweetheart Nikki
Cavendish has added music to her
perennial smash hit and called it
It's Snowing on Saltspring
Tra-Lah. At the Arts Club Granville Island until December 31st.
A Christmas Carol
-A New Musical
Thisis the one where Scrooge finds
the true meaning of Christmas,
and then sings about it. Or does he
sing about the true meaning of
Christmas before he knows what
itis? What came first, the song or
the discovery of the true meaning
of Christmas? Anyway, this is
always a good story, even if we all
know how it ends. God bless us
Richmond Gateway Theatre
from December 9th
In the November
29th issue of The
Ubyssey, a headline read "McGiR
assault charges
dropped." No
charges were laid
and therefore none
were dropped. The
person responsible, however, has
been dropped from
the face of the
recent snow update
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Brad Upton
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1040 KICKS presents
door proceeds to
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Wed. & Thurs.
Fri. & Sat.
9:00pm &
Expo Site
(next to 86 Street)
valid Thursday only
to Literature
in English
Ian Onsby, Editor
Foreword by
Margaret Atwood
JL he New Cambridge Guide to Literature
in English, although a comprehensive, authoritative,
and up-to-date reference book, is more than that. It
is also a testament to the amazing range and vitality
of the English language itself."
—Margaret Atwood
A he Cambridge Guide to Literature in English
is a new illustrated single-volume reference that
provides up-to-date, authoritative information on
literature from around the English-speaking world.
At bookstores or order from
32 East 57th Street, New York, NY 10022
December 2,1988
THE UBYSSEY/9 Sarah blows Grapes away
by Paul Preto and Jennifer Adachi
An energetic Sarah McLachlan
appeared on stage Saturday night,
opening for The Grapes of Wrath at the
New York Theatre in East Van.
The only disappointment ofthe night
was the length of McLachlan's set—she
came on 20 minutes late (just after 8:30)
and had to leave at 9:15 without an encore
to allow the headliners to set up.
The short set, however, was plenty of
time for McLachlan to get the crowd's
attention. Her wide ranging, sensuous voice
entranced the young crowd who responded
to her questions eagerly: "Having fun?"—
"Yes!", and chorused "Hoopla!" at her
prompting. Apparently this is an expression she's brought from Halifax.
Sarah McLachlan and
The Grapes of Wrath
New York Theatre, November 25
As a token of their appreciation,
members of the audience showered her
with packets of Dubble Bubble Bubble
Gum—the ones with the stupid cartoons.
The Grapes of Wrath came on just
after 10:00 and played a tight set. Musically sound, The Grapes didn't display the
same exuberance and excitement as Sarah
and her band. In fact, they appeared at
times bored and jaded. Some of their new
tunes sounded promising, but McLachlan
stole the show.
Following the concert, we spoke with
McLachlan and her band in their dressing
McLachlan came to Vancouver from
Halifax just over a year ago. She was 17
and singing in a band called the October
Game that "lasted three and a half years:
. all of three live gigs and five songs written
and put on tape. A slow project., no one
ever had any money." Their first live gig
was opening for Moev, who were so impressed with her voice they asked her to
sing for them.
"It didn't happen cause my parents
flipped out. I was in Grade 11...no way are
you going to Vancouver—they'll fill you full
of cocaine and make you sign your life
away."   Two years later the October Game
opened for Skinny Puppy and she was
offered a five year solo contract. This she
couldn't refuse.
McLachlan packed up and moved to
Vancouver in September 1987. She spent
seven months writing and then recorded her
debut album, Touch. The first single, "Vox",
has a video that gets airplay on MuchMusic,
and plans are in the works for a video for
"Steaming"—to be shot in New Orleans.
Her songs are even heard at (gasp)
Luvafair: Big time.
Unlike many pop singers, McLachlan's
voice is classically trained—she has been
singing "forever." That includes 5 years of
operatic training and "tons" of recitals, as
well as 12 years of classical guitar—heavy
influences on her music. She sings with a
headset mike—reminiscent of a telephone
operator—so she can play her 12 string
guitar and not have to hunch over a mike
McLachlan had a problem with her
guitar Saturday. On the night before, she
tried to re-string it without success, so she
had to borrow a friend's guitar with a wider
neck and slippery strap that made it tough
to play.
The evening at the New York Theatre
ended early as usual, since its residential
neighborhood location means that the
music must stop by 11:15. The evening was
reminiscent ofthe film A Star is Born, with
Sarah McLachlan as the rising star, and
The Grapes of Wrath as the band past its
Pianist pleases
by Gordon Lucas
If you were extremely fortunate last
Sunday night, you heard Andrea Lucchesini. Ifyou didn't, you missed what may
have been the finest piano recital heard in
this city for many a moon.
Italy has given us a long line of very
special, unique keyboard artists; one need
only mention Busoni, Michelangeli, Lipatti,
and Pollini and hear their recordings to realize that Andrea Lucchesini is the heir to
their throne. He is a pianist in the grand
Romantic tradition, a consummate virtuoso
who is alternately a thunderer, a poet, a
magician. He also possesses a hint of
eccentricity that makes him an electric
stage presence.
Andrea Lucchesini
Vancouver Playhouse
November 27
Born in Montecantini, Italy in 1965,
Lucchesini has reached the giddy heights of
international stardom since winning
Milan's prestigious Dino Ciano Competition
in 1983. Since then he has played in almost
every centre in Europe, toured extensively
in North America, and recorded a substantial number of discs for Angel/EMI.
Lucchesini's program on Sunday was
a delight to the die-hard Romantic—
Chopin, Schumann, a little more Chopin
for good measure. It was the kind of
concert where you can shut your eyes and
indulge in your most private fantasies.
Very few pianists are successful with this
type of programming. Lucchesini is.
Capable of astonishing variety, Lucchesini has perhaps the best pedal technique
of any pianist I have heard. Artists at this
level miss very few notes, often
at the expense of
Lucchesini encouraging his audience to dream
sicality and excitement. Lucchesini took
risks that are not seen frequently on the
recital stage, and brought off the program
with flawless aplomb.
The first half was all Chopin. The first
and third Impromptus are potboilers of the
best kind, and received well defined, understated attention from Lucchesini. The
Andante spianato e grand polonaise
followed. This is not a frequently programmed work, and on hearing it, one has
to wonder why. It is loaded with good tunes
and the changes of mood and virtuosity
that are the hallmark of Chopin. Lucchesini gave this a more extroverted reading
than the impromptus, setting the stage for
the piece we were all waiting for: the great
Sonata #2 in B flat minor. One could not
have hoped for a better performance.
The opening movement was provided
with just the right voicing and drama, the
second movement was alternately exciting
and poetic, but the famous funeral march
and finale were positively eerie. Lucchesini
played them almost as a unit, and in this
context the finale was, indeed, as Schumann said, "a wind over the grave."
Lucchesini's program on
Sunday was a delight to the
die-hard Romantic—
It would be hard to imagine any soloist
maintaining the standard of the first half of
the program, but if anything, Lucchesini
was even better in Schumann's Carnaval,
Opus 9. This work took up the entire
second half. It is a collection of exquisite
and diverse miniatures, and shows off just
about anything that the piano is capable of
doing. Artist and music were perfectly
matched, and the effortless performance
received a well deserved standing ovation
from the capacity audience. Lucchesini
responded to the enthusiastic applause
with a delightful rendition of a Scarlatti
sonata that sent us all home happy.
The Vancouver Recital Society has
brought Andreas Lucchesini to this city for
an uprecedented three consecutive years.
Let us hope they make it four. If they do,
get your tickets early. This is a man not to
Cavendish and Cuffling: An adult Christmas
by Robert Groberman
Combine a stunning set, a funny,
poignant script, entertaining
music, and playwright/actress Nicola
Cavendish, and you have a happy Christmas show that lets its adult audience
experience the wonder of childhood at the
most magical time of year.
It's Snowing on Saltspring Tra-Lah
Arts Club Granville Island
Until December 31
It's Snowing on Saltspring Tra-Lah
succeeds because it does not try to be more
than it is—a cheerful, funny romp through
playwright Nicola Cavendish's fevered
holiday imagination.
First performed two years ago, as It's
Snowing on Saltspring and repeated last
year with alterations, It's Snowing on
Saltspring Tra-Lah is the same play with
music added for the first time.
The play is the story of Bill, a dentist
who has quit his job and moved to
Saltspring Island with his wife. As Bill
reflects on his life and the personal crises
he has endured, he is visited by Santa
Claus. Santa takes him to the North Pole,
where all things become clear, and disturbing childhood memories are exorcized.
Along the way we discover the true meaning of Christmas.
Director Janet Wright has assembled a
cast which is very comfortable with the
sometimes sappy, sometimes corny material. Cavendish, as Bernice Snarpley,
Grindle and Peggy O'Darby, is flawless in
her transformation from lesbian real-estate
agent to female elf to male elf.
Fran Gebetter is better as Mrs. Claus
December 2,1988 \mmm
Corny jokes still amuse masses
6y jRicft Hiebert
Very briefly, one could say that The
Naked Gun is delightfully stupid
and hilariously dumb.
The Naked Gun is a new comedy by
the people who made Airplane and Top
Secret. Like those films, The Naked Gun
tosses all sorts of sight gags and zany jokes
at its audience. Most jokes work. Some
The Naked Gun
Denman Place
Starts today
The film owes a lot to the 1982 series
Police Squad, created by the same warped
minds that made this film: Jerry Zucker,
Jim Abrahams and David Zucker.
The plot, such as it is, centers on L.A.
police Lieutenant Frank Drebin (played
with icy campiness by Leslie Nielsen) who
must foil a plot by villain Vincent Ludwig
to kill Queen Elizabeth who is making a
royal visit. Priscilla Presley plays the
ingenue and Drebin's love interest.
As in Airplane!, The Naked Gun takes
the plot and runs with it. Occasionally the
film gets rude and crude, but it's usually
funny. It's wild and zany and the creators
ofthe film toss in anything they think the
audience will laugh at.
Judging by the audience's reaction,
this film should be a hit, although I found
? sparkles
than she is as Goldie, the nosey neighbour
on Saltspring. Her maternal warmth as
Martha Claus gives Santa himself competition for the jolliest elf.
The set, by Ted Roberts and Phillip
Tidd is spectacular. Act one's Saltspring
cabin is convincingly realistic, and Santa's
House in act two is pure theatre magic.
Many congratulations must go to stage
manager Marion Anderson and her crew
for the opening sequence to the second act.
It is gratifying to see that theatrical special
effects can still be as exciting and mystifying as anything in a motion picture.
The music, by Harry Kalensky, with
lyrics by Kalensky and Cavendish, are
entertaining if forgettable. The songs add
little to the play in the first act. In the
second act, the songs are inserted with the
skill of a Stephen Spielberg to bring out the
wonderful sentimentality demanded of
Christmas shows.
It's Snowing on Saltspring
Tra-Lah is a cheerful, funny
romp through playwright
Nicola Cavendish's fevered
holiday imagination.
Just as the colours red and green look
hideous together except at Christmas, so to
do sentimentality and theatre suddenly
become an acceptable combination during
the Yuletide season.
It's Snowing on Saltspring Tra-Lah is
becoming a Christmas tradition at the Arts
Club, and it has been getting better each
year. Since Cavendish says this is her last
run with the show, this may be as good as
it gets.
myself occasionally thinking "Why did I
laugh at that? That was stupid."
Some of the supporting players add
spice to the film. O.J. Simpson suffers well
as Nordberg, the policeman who serves as a
butt for one of the film's better running
Baseball star Reggie
Jackson is amusingly
zombie-like as the homicidal
killer and I loved the late
John Houseman's cameo as
the unflappable driving
school instructor. I thought
that Houseman's turn was
the best part of the show (the
young lady he teaches how to
drive evidently has a fine
career ahead of her on the
NASCAR circuit).
The Naked Gun isn't intellectually
stimulating, but it's quite amusing nevertheless. How could you help but like a film
where Frank tells Priscilla Presley during a
lover's spat, "You should know this...I faked
every orgasm"?
Leslie Nielsen and Priscilla Presley: Take that you dirty rat
Political message mars movie
By Rick Hiebert
They should've called this film
"Rowdy Roddy Piper versus the
Socreds From Outer Space."
Despite its blah title, They Live is an
imaginative blend of science fiction and fast
paced action. It would have been a better
film if its creators hadn't attempted to fuse
a strong political message to a film that
wasn't designed for it.
They Live
Fraser Cinema
Now Playing
The film centers on John Nada, a
drifter who wanders into Los Angeles
looking for work, capably played by former
television wrestler "Rowdy" Roddy Piper.
Roddy finds work alongside Frank (played
by Keith David) in a construction site. The
film drags for the first twenty minutes as it
sets up the premise of the film. Try not to
fall asleep.
When Roddy falls in with an underground guerilla movement fighting the aliens that have secretly taken over Earth,
things begin to pick up.
The space aliens look just like humans,
except when one wears souped up Raybans
which enable people to read their subliminal propaganda that the aliens insert into
the media in order to control Earthlings.
These sunglasses also allow Earthlings to
spot the aliens, who look like, as Piper's
character puts it, "cheese dip that has been
left out on the counter since 1957."
Roddy and Frank declare war on the
aliens. The action is gripping, fast and energetic. The fistfight in the alley between
Frank and Roddy goes on for ten minutes
and is one ofthe best in recent memory.
The basic premise of the film is imaginative, with the aliens appealing to human
greed and recruiting quislings from among
the affluent. Had They Live merely chosen
to make a point about loyalty and human
failings, it would have been a dandy film.
However, They Live is marred by its
hamhanded and clumsy attempt to bash
the political right.
It seems that these space creatures are
celestial "free enterprisers...and we're their
new Third World." There are alien politicians promising, as Ronald Reagan did, "a
new morning in America ....optimism for
the future."
The film's director, John Carpenter
told the Reuters Wire Service that "...the
premise (of They Live) is that the Reagan
revolution is controlled by aliens. The
aliens were designed to look like Republicans."
Meaningful political messages don't
work well in action films. People go to see
movies like this in order to be entertained.
They shouldn't have to suffer through
rhetoric reminiscent of those Cold War
anti-Soviet thrillers of the '50's.
John Carpenter should know better.
Roddy Piper and Keith David face alien ghouls
December 2,1988
Detach and Submit with $15.00 Deposit to Gallery Lounge
Student # .
Photo Description
Second Choice
* ;v" •or*&&ci
continued from page 18 •
,l& " ■_¥■■■■ v+w ■yyvw-y^
Ubyssey Grinch strikes again
You are invited to
drop by and discuss your future at our
December 6/7 from 3:30 to 8:30 p.m.
When you've finished your studies why not
consider BCIT? Our advanced technology post
diploma programs can put you ahead in today's
competitive job market.
Our faculty and staff will be pleased to provide
information and advice to help you make critical
decisions about your future.
The School of Engineering Technology offers
programs in electronics, civil, mechanical,
process, renewable resources and computer
Free Admission/Lots of parking.
Call 434-3304 for information.
whined and wept when they heard.
Leanadra Esfakis, Doug Eastwood,
Dale Enns jumped out the windows in
grief, which was no great loss.
Monk   hated   Christmas!   The
whole Christmas season!
It could be her head wasn't screwed on
just right.
It could be, perhaps, that her shoes
were too tight.
"But I think it could be her panties got
stuck up her ass," according to Peter.
Andrea Lupini, Howie Lee, Neil Lucente and Michael Jung said:
"Noooooooo, say it isn't so" as they ran
naked out ofthe room. Pat Nakamura,
Stacy Newcombe, Wendy Waters and
Kris Obertas, roused from their
drunken stupor, slurred, ™Ello, and
wot do we 'ave 'ere?" in reference to the
fleeing buttocks.
Meanwhile, Whatever the reason,
her head or her panties,
she stood there on Christmas
Eve, hating the Whos.
"I must find some way to stop
Christmas from coming!" she bellowed
as she skated into the room, to her
henchwoman Corinne Bjorge who at
the time was flagellating Joan Bratty,
Chris Beck, Doug Bryson and Rachel
Cayley. "Ooooh, it's a 'orrible thing,"
they squealed in delight. Lathered in a
fine sheen of sweat, Bjorge smiled into
the fire and laughed: "ho. ho. ho."
"Nooo, you silly cow, we're stealing
Christmas now," Monk sneered.
"Come here," beckoned Monk.
Tracy Monk (no relation to the
Grinch), Martin Dawes, Bratley "Big"
Dickson, Omar Diaz, Carolyn Ber-
nadino, Brat Bonar and Susan Atkins
squealed in fear.
Monk knew for tomorrow all the
Who girls and boys like Leandra
Esfakis, Jon Eriksen, Andrea Finch,
Chung Wong, Angela Weltz, Barbara
Wilson and Melanie Slate would wake
bright and early. They'd rush for their
toys. Oh the Noise! Noise! Noise!
squealing and smiles. That's one thing
she hated, particularly when Laura
Busheikin and Svetozar Kontic
played the weeeee-ji board.
And the Who, young and old,
would sit down to a feast, like Heather
Jenkins, Keith Damsell, David Ferman, and E.T. "call home" Pang. And
they'd feast and they'd eat. "Eat. Eat.
Eat," chanted Olivia Zanger, Dana
Tilley, Sean Kelly, and Dan Andrews
as they gorged some more on a half
'3m Natural Leather bags =
go anywhere, am/time for any age.
3 ree style is a tradition for the
at the Carlisle,
732 Thurlow Street
Vancouver British Columbia V6£. 1V&
cooked roast with blood dripping from
their fatty chops. Which was something the Grinch couldn't stand in the
And THEN they'd do something
she liked least of all! Myron Neville,
Cathy Lu, Jennifer Cho, Adam Jones,
Doug Konrad would start singing
"Highway to Hell" in three part harmony to the tune of Jingle Bells. Followed closely by Martin Chester,
Sailen Black, Ian Jack and Dave
Miller breaking into a soft shoe shuffle
to the sound of Clara Young, Joanne
Neilson, Sheila West and Laurie
McGuiness regurgitating their dinner.
"I MUST stop this whole Christmas shit from coming!
For fifty fucking years I've been
putting up with this!
....But How?" she whined to Bjorge
who was breaking heads off dolls that
looked like Tim McGrady and Keith
Then she got an idea!
Got an awful sadistic idea!
"I know just what to do!" she
gurgled in her throat, choking on a
slug of Jack Daniels she coughed up
her windpipe and dribbled down her
chin. And she made a quick Santy
Claus hat and a coat. "All I need is a
reindeer..." The Grinch looked around.
"If I can't find a reindeer, Fll make one
instead!" she said strapping an
enormous stick to Conine's little
head. Then she loaded some bags and
some old empty sacks on a ramshack-
led sleigh and she leashed up old Bjor"
who cried "Tighter, tighter," in masochistic delight while Chris Brayshaw,
Allan English, Bob Harris and Paul
Preto wished they were next.
All the while the little Whos were
asleep. Among them, Ilona Biro,
Robert Kanno, and Marilyn Letts lay
entwined in a pile of buttocks, limbs,
oil and cream, throbbing. We'll let
them stew for awhile. Back to the
"This is stop number one," the old
Grinch Claus hissed and she climbed
to the roof, empty bags in her fist. Then
she slid down the chimney, a rather
difficult chore, to find Rosanna
Ditmars', Melanie Slate's, J.B. Holm's
and Bob Cameron's stockings hung
from the mantlepiece. These are the
first to go." And she proceeded to loot
the house.
She saw a small who. Deanne
Fisher-who, who peeped around the
corner. "Boo hoo. Boo hoo. Why are you
taking Christmas?" Fisher-who-Price
blubbered pathetically in her usual
tone of voice. "Aaargh...shut up, you
snivelling little runt. And get back to
your space with the rest of those
chumps," Monk said tossing Fisher-
who through the door. "Boo hoo. Boo
hoo," she cried to the other little whos,
Derek Craig, Jennifer Lyall, Stephen
Scrimshaw and Stephen Wisenthal,
who disentangled their flexible limbs
to the sound of pant and grunts.
It was quarter past dawn...
All the Whos, still a-bed,
All the Whos, still a-snooze
Monk packed up her sled,
whipped ol' Bjor with a delicate crack,
and "On Ted Aussem, on Alexandra
Johnson, on Evan Scholnick, on Lisa
Doyle...and everyone on Gordon
Clark!" she barked, running over
Mandel Ngan and Steve Chan,
dressed in only a trench coat. Ngan
collapsed with a shriek, puking up
eggnog and roast beast all over Joe
Altwasser, Joanne Braithwaite, Bradley Dickson, Gyles Gysel and Chris
Wiesenger, who said, "I quit." Monk
shrieked with glee and whipped
Bjorge up to Mount Seymour.
"Pooh-Pooh to the Whos!" she was
grinch-ish-ly cackling. They're just
waking up! I know just what they'll do.
Their mouths will hang open a minute
or two then the Whos down in Who-
ville will all cry BOO-HOO!"
Cackling with hatred she pushed
the sleigh off a precipice into a bottomless alpine lake below despite the
pleas of Corrine, who was dragged
along screaming "Aaaaaayyyyyy",
and Ernest Steltzer, Laura Mullen,
Craig Nelson, Kathryn MacDonald,
and John Hudson who sobbed pathetically and beat their breasts and pulled
out their hair in abject distress and
awe. Robert Groberman recoiled in
laughter, coughing up gouts of dark
red blood.
Director: Robert Beynon Directions
Third Gaff: Sheila Hansen.
Cacophonic music by Rick Hiebert.
Title stolen from Linda Diano.
Head Waiter: Mike Braverman.
Electric GuitanFranka Von Sprecht
Fiddle: Becci Colthard.
Groupies: Robin Muehlenbach, Mary
Clarinet and Slide Guitar: Melissa
FROM $139.00
DEC. 29 - JAN. 2
PHONE 874-2922
"5 stars." - Mark Andrews, Vancouver Sun
Michael is
spending Christmas
with Gaby and
her sisters.
And he's in love
with one of them.
If he could only
decide which one.
Showtimes effective
December 2 - 8
No Matinees
B.C. WARNING ■ Some nudity,
occasional suggestive scenes &
very coarse language
December 2,1988 David Beatie: Achieving aspirations requires courage.
A glow in the shadows
of racism and poverty
By Chung Wong
How does one respond to
a person who says, "I
ain't got nothing?"
At age 54, David Beattie
is "too old" to be given any
Canadian job. Past last call,
Beattie spends hours in the
night searching for refundable bottles and cans left in
the streets. Without a job, it
has become his only method
of obtaining a financial supplement to his welfare check
in order to survive. Tonight is
a good night. He finds a
usable pen and paper left in a
bag by a doorway.
"To fight alcoholism is to resist the struggle of your life," he
says, "My mind is so deteriorated
from alcoholism. It's a pathetic
Walking around the east
side, Beattie unveils places that
have become an important part
of his life.
He points to a concrete
building at a street corner.
"That's Carnegie Hall where all
the ethnic minorities can gather.
I can read the paper there everyday."
Police in their patrol cars
often slow down during the night
to observe people like Beattie.
"They watch you like a hawk
here," Beattie jests.
"I'm trying to be independent," Beattie says, "I kind of
handle my affairs on my own."
"I tried to be a good Joe once.
I did this and that as hard as I
could for bosses. But in the end it
breaks you."
Beattie is among the many
Natives that have "broken laws.'
For Beattie the rules of society
favour non-Natives. In B.C.
alone, 60 percent ofthe prison
population is Native. According
to a Royal Commmission, the
number of incidences for arrest
for Natives is three times the
number for that ofthe "general
population." In the past few
months, occurences of racism
toward Natives in the judical
system and amongst the RCMP
have been reported by several
newspapers all across Canada.
According to Chief Joeseph
Norton ofthe Kahnawake
reserve near Montreal, "good,
outstanding citizens are considered (by police) to be armed and
dangerous and to be approached
with caution."
To Beattie, the society set up
by non-Natives has been cold. As
a consequence, the acts of
violence which he has witnessed
and endured have become
Beattie unlocks a door to a
dark building. The doorway is
sprayed with urine. He walks up
a shanty staircase. As he unlocks
his apartment, a thin man who is
sweating, a friend, inquires if the
neighbor living next door had
killed people in Calgary. Beattie
quietly responds, "Yeah. Five
kids. The man is crazy."
Above Beattie's left eye is a
deep cut. He says he was
attacked recently by the
nextdoor neighbor whom according to Beattie has 'satanic'
conversations with himself.
Beattie says he was attacked
with a metal scraper which was
applied to his scalp.
"In regard to the
treatment of
indigenous peoples,
there are countries
with worse records,
but I think yours is
far from a just one."
-Peter Gabriel
After Beattie steps into his
place, a rat jumps through the
broken window and then disappears into the corner. "Sorry, I
had to get rid ofthe chair so I
could have room to walk,"
Beattie says.
He offers tea in a new cup
found earlier in the street. The
apartment is slightly larger than
a closet. It has a functionless
window which faces a brick wall.
Cold air passes easily through
the break in the glass. On
weekends loud rock music can be
heard all night from nearby
clubs. The radiator is busted so
he heats the room with the gas
from the stove.
Down the hallway is a
bathroom shared by all the
tenants on the floor. The bathtub
is stained by urine.
There's no toilet.
Glancing at the rotting food
on the counter, Beattie says,
"The only problem is I don't have
a fridge so I have to cook all the
eggs and meat that the food
banks give me quick."
Several fruit flies nibble at
his face as he speaks.
As he gets more comfortable,
he is able to speak of realities
that have dominated his life.
"My brother Ernie is in the
Pen right now. He's a heavier
drinker. He went crazy and
threw someone through a
window three stories down. Him
and I fight all the time."
"Police treat me really bad
because I'm Native. I've been in
there (the Police Station) 3 or 4
times to report on the beatings
I've been getting for nothing
from that insane guy next door.
They kind of ignore me as if I
don't exist."
Beatty himself spent five
and a half years in a penitentiary but says he is relatively
happy now.
"I know a lot. Basically I'm
happy and content. I owned and
operated a sawmill on my own."
But he is critical of the
injustices around him, especially
in the justice system.
"The justice system is like
the KKK in the United States.
There's so many blacks in jail."
"You know we're only five
per cent ofthe population (yet)
we're a majority in jail. There's
something (he shakes his
"I wrote letters to Trudeau
(Pierre Trudeau was Prime
Minister at the time) and the
Indian Affairs Minister on behalf
of our people. The politicians
aren't bringing it out enough.
Not only their attitudes toward
Natives but minorities also.
White people don't understand
Indians. White people are quite
somewhat ignorant—even to
their own kind. Fm not saying all
of them are like that—just most."
Despite the poor social
conditions Beattie has faced, his
sense of compassion has not yet
continued on page 16
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3431 WEST BROADWAY 738-5298
B.C. Coalition of the Disabled's
1000 's of Used Books, Records & Tapes
Saturday, December 10th
10 am to 4 pm
Robson Square Media Centre
800 Robson Street
With Guest Authors
Admission: 250
Great Prices on Antiquarian, Kid's,
Classics, Mysteries, Travel... and more!!
"Thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you..."
__■<'< v>.>;§\    "^&&    _______________________M______________^^
The PW Recruiting Team from left to right: Heather Nicolaas, Deirdre Carter, Dave Goold,
Sandi Stugis and Ross Elliott
.. .for coming by to see us - on campus and in our office. We hope all of your
discussions with Price Waterhouse staff were informative, useful...interesting
and fun. We enjoyed meeting all of you.
Good luck with your Christmas exams...and Cheers!
Price Waterhouse
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is now accepting applications for
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minimum of 8 hours / week
and maximum of 18 hours / week
Please apply in person
with course schedule to
Room 100 K Main Concourse
Student Union Building
6138 SUB Boulevard
Between 2:00 and 4:00 pjn.
Monday to Friday
Previous Applicants ire
welcome to reapply.
10/ off all regular
priced items with
A.M.5. card or copy
of this ad.
3355 West Broadway
December 2,1988
tic..**,... .-» .nw.rvwj FiAfU&E
The PhD Trap:
Everyone wants one
but few succeeds
By Zeb Brown
Canadian University Press
Theodore Streleski had spent half his lifetime working
on his PhD in mathematics at Stanford University when,
in frustration in August 1978, he bludgeoned his thesis director to death with a hammer.
"(Stanford) took 19 years of my life with impunity and
I decided I would not let that pass," said Streleski, who
was 42 at the time. "Under the same circumstances I'd do
it again."
Today, you must have a PhD to teach or research at a North American university. Would-be professors accept this, and devote seven to
twelve years, or even more, to complete the degree.
In Canada, it takes an average of six years to complete a PhD, according to the Canadian Association of Graduate Schools.
Hi. Just think... The Ubyssey is so
desperate for writers that they're
kidnapping stray doggies like me to
write for them. It's lots of fun, but it's
hard to touch type with paws. So
please come to SUB 241 k and give
me a hand, so to speak. (Please
hurry! They've promised me a can of
ALPO for every new staffer)
But only 7.5 per cent of arts students who attempt the North American doctor of philosophy degree are granted one. In science, only 20 per
cent ofthe PhD candidates finish.
To those who have given up, and to the tiny, steadfast collection of
critics of the doctorate system, Streleski's heinous act may have been
The PhD was once an honorary certificate, available for a small
price but it has become an overblown exercise in "self-assigned pedantry," says Wilfred Cude, author of "The PhD Trap."
After completing his master degree in English at Dalhousie University, Cude enrolled in the PhD program at the University of Alberta,
only to see his career end when the school's advisory committee refused
to examine his thesis — even though it had already been praised in
many recognized journals.
"The PhD Trap," published in 1987, described a PhD system which
stultifies innovation, lowers teaching standards and forces the brightest students out ofthe educational system.
"No publisher would touch the book," Cude recalls in an interview
in Halifax. "How you can get trashed by a doctoral program was judged
too academic, too dry."
Instead, Cude went to a bank machine, withdrew as much cash as
he could and got 500 copies printed on his own. "In a year in which
35,000 people were enrolled in grad school, heading towards misery, I
simply could not fart around looking for a publisher."
The astonishing failure rate among PhD candidates has meant millions in wasted provincial grants, as well as incalculable costs to the
student in time, effort and stress, the book argues.
Because candidates have to defend their dissertation to a small
number of academics and because rating standards are not quantitative, students have little protection against biased or arbitrary decisions.
Methodologies and faculty personalities play a greater role in determining the success of PhD students than the students themselves,
says Cude, citing an American study which shows that PhDs were much
less likely to complete their degrees if they got good marks as undergraduates.
"Faculty autonomy means they have the right to be as arbitrary as
they damn well want," he says. "Ifyou are a graduate program, you are
living in an oligarchy, not a democracy."
Doctoral candidates in science have a higher success rate because
the program is less prone to subjective standards, Cude says. Study
methods there are more streamlined and standardized.
In the arts and in the social sciences, however, "the established
practitioners have not attained a consensus on what constitutes a significant piece of work. It is supremely foolish, arrogant and unjust to
insist that a senior student must defend a fledgling venture into
research as anything more."
continued on page 17
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continued from page 13
completely degenerated. He still
expresses concern for oppressed
people in Canada. At one point in
his life, he had received a
certificate honoring his services
at a Native guidance center. He
likes to work and talk to people.
Beattie has very few complaints about his life now. He
knows of many, meets many, and
lives with many who are not as
well off as he is.
As it neared 4:00 a.m., the
interview with David Beattie
winded down.
"I may be old but I'm still
fighting like a whipper snapper,"
Beattie says.
"I don't know why I fight—
It's in my nature I guess."
"I don't mean to be who I
am. Sometime I might get
Beattie's hospitality will
often extend toward any stranger
or drifter in the street.
For many, Beattie's perception of Canadian society may
may be hard to identify with, but
his reality is one that clearly
exists and pervades the lives of
many Natives.
In his eyes, Canadian
indignations of human rights
abuses such as apartheid hold
little credibility in light of abuses
faced by Natives in Canada.
These abuses have determined
Beattie's life. Constitutional
rights have answered many
institutional strongholds and
individuals but seldom have they
been applied to First Nations
In a second visit, Beattie has
eaten stew made with meat
found in the street. He cooked
the stew three times to ensure
that the bacteria will die.
When asked what he would
like done to improve the social
situation between society and
Natives, Beattie answers simply,
"put that welfare check back up."
"In regard to the treatment of
indigenous peoples, there are
countries with worse records, but
I think yours is far front a just
one." -Peter Gabriel, Amnesty
International Human Rights
Now! Tour, Montreal Press
Breaking alienation: his hospitality will extend toward any stranger or drifter in the street.
With best wishes to all our readers from The
Ubyssey staff. Have a safe and happy holiday.
Andy Morden
U.B.C. - Commerce
Thorne Ernst & Whinney Summer Student
' _T
it was fascinating. I finally got an
understanding of the procedures,
subtleties and complexities of an
Business is great at Thorne Ernst & Whinney and we
are looking for bright, ambitious summer students to
share the experience.
For more information on how you can work with us,
call Bruce Pentecost at 661-3096. We will invest in
your success.
Thorne Ernst & Whinney
Chartered Accountants
Memher of
Ernst & Whinney
Photo/Mechanical Transfer
Camera Operator
•10 paid hours a week
• required to work on production nights
(graveyard shift): Mondays and Thursdays
• job training provided
• photography lab/darkroom
experience an asset
• offers experience in photo-journalism,
journalism and graphic design
December 2,1988 mmm
PhD trap
continued from page IS ^^~~~~~
What is and what is not scholarly achievement depends to an
uncomfortable extent on the personality of the individual receiving the dissertation.
Regardless of the discipline,
Cude says, it is unlikely innovative scholarship will be recognized. He uses examples from
history and psychological evidence to argue that brilliant
graduate work is more often than
not dismissed as misguided by
conservative examiners.
"It is highly unlikely that
most doctoral candidates are capable of producing real scholarly
innovation anyhow," so to demand it is "to involve all concerned in hypocrisy, heartbreak
and hopeless pretension."
Cude recommends that having made a valuable contribution
to an academic field in a form
other than the traditional dissertation be taken in consideration.
He says the acceptance of articles
by recognized journals, for example, should be sufficient.
Doctorate students
don't automatically tune
their minds out of all other
subjects, he says. Nor do
they lose the broad base of
knowledge acquired while
completing the early stages
ofthe PhD.
Kerry McSweeney, Director
ofthe PhD program in English at
McGill University in Montreal is
a strong supporter ofthe doctoral
system. Cude's alternative is
"worth talking about," he says,
but no substitute for the PhD.
"One value ofthe dissertation
is that the student does long term
critical research investigation. It
can't be replicated."
Mcsweeney says the doctorate does produce innovative work.
"Certainly in some departments there are blinkered professors," he says, but students can
get around them.
"In any big first class English
department there are a variety of
methodological tools and approaches. Professors don't control
students—departments do, and
there are grievance procedures."
But Cude says collegiality
and academic pride repeatedly
intervene in grievance procedures, making them ineffective.
"You will not have an actual
honest appeal system because
they will fight you and you will
have to fight them," he says.
"Any PhD student with a
problem is real at the mercy ofthe
professor," says Mcgill PhD student Guy Denkerley. "You risk a
great deal by going public and
pointing out the problem."
Denkerley says one successful
PhD student at the University of
Windsor had his thesis pulled off
the printing press by a professor
who didn't like the student's criticism of one of his courses.
Cude also says the specialized
PhD is poor preparation for teaching undergraduates where
breadth of knowledge and teaching skill are most important.
Instead, he says students
with master degrees in arts or science who have completed a one
year teaching internship, could
improve the quality of undergraduate instruction.
Dan German, a McGill PhD
student in history with two MAs
says Cude is being extreme. Doctorate students don't automatically tune their minds out of all
other subjects, he says. Nor do
they lose the broad base of knowledge acquired while completing
the early stages ofthe PhD.
The doctorate was meant to
stand on an equal footing with the
masters, as certification to do research alone, but the spirit of elitism quickly made it a prerequisites for any university work.
Masters degrees became a pale
substitute. Many of those who
want to teach have no interest in
research, Cude says, and are deterred by the doctorate.
McSweeney says teaching
and research requires many ofthe
same skills. After a point in the
program, the distinction between
teaching and research disappears. "The student is shown how
to deal with and think about the
material, and the professor shows
how they've dealt with it."
He added, "An integral part of
the PhD in North America is the
teaching assistant experience. It
serves to enhance the quality of
undergraduate instruction and
provides the graduate student
with valuable experience."
McSweeney says high dropout rates are caused by universities that hire too many teaching
"Some universities use teaching assistants for almost all first
year undergraduate courses, and
consequently need a large number
of students in their PhD program.
...they don't know when to
stop researching.
"Students enter passively because they're offered a job and so
on, rather than actively, and then
realize after a while the self-discipline that the program demands."
German says some graduate
students take too long to complete
their degrees because they don't
know when to stop researching.
"You have a large number of
graduate students who always
think, 'there's just one more book
to read before I start writing.' It's
one of the reasons you get people
in MA 18 and nonsense like that."
'Nonsense like that' permeates the PhD system in North
America. Cude's description ofthe
decline of graduate studies is hard
to argue, presented through case
studies and statistics. But his
explanations, criticism and recommendations are contentious,
and as German suggested, often
extreme, with unrealistic solutions to problems which may not
even exist.
Graduate and potential
graduate students should read
"The PhD Trap," and see what
their advisors have to say about it.
The book is of interest for the
general students population, as
well, informing them about the
often unseemly inner workings of
Dinner k Concert Studies
(prerequisite: The Philosophy of Fun)
Learn to have fun without guilt! Todays students
need to balance scholastic endeavors with Social pursuits. Enrol in this course by purchasing
AMS Concert tickets at Fogg n'Suds. After ademanding
practicum of dinners and parties, graduation is marked
by a diploma ceremony and photos of students having
fun appearing in the Ubyssey paper.
Upcoming Foi AMS Events
HydroElectric Streetcar
Dec 9
Register At FOGG U CAMPUS • Kitsilano- Broadway - English. Bay
3fk      Garfield Ice Scrapers
t|r      Calvin & Hobbs T-Shirts, Calendars,
and Books (Farside too!)
^      Crazy Christmas Cards, Wrap, Party Stuff
& Helium Balloons
ife.      Toys, Toys, Toys....from Rough Rider Tricycles
to Glow-in-the-Dark Christmas Stickers
4449 W.IOth.   224-5311
Open Weeknights In Dec. And Sun . PM'S
KIDS ONLY MARKET Granville Island, 684-0066,
Open Market Hours
December 2,1988
THE UBYSSEY/17 - s \ - - -   " ; *       * i    . y    " > *• 3
'    *• -,
^    ■■--
■.s^wN   >.•>.■. V.W.V.   \syX
The spirit
of giving
It's tradition. Which means we have to do it whether
we're feeling very generous or not. So here it goes, the
annual Ubyssey Christmas gift list.
We understand that AMS president Tim Bird has a
bit of a fetish. To him we give an outboard motor and a
For vice-president Carolyn Egan, a window scraper to
get the little people off the bottom of her boots.
For external affairs co-ordinator Lisa Eckman, transit concession cards.
Director of finance Karl Kottmeier already has what
he wants for Christmas—a resume.
To director of administration Leanne Jacobs, we give
some decent security teams.
For campus sex therapist Kurt Priensperg, a zen med-
tiation session in hot tub full of jello. Alone.
For student board of governors representative Geoff
Lyster, who for the first three months of his term was
known to The Ubyssey staff as "the guy with facial parts
missing on his posters", a nose.
For AMS general manager Charles Redden, anything
but a pay hike.
For AMS comptroller Gerry Wan, a Valium. Or two.
Arts president Mike Lee is especially fond of
committee's. We're more than happy to give him a few
For the engineers, a lifetime subscription to The
Ubyssey and some social skills.
For AMS archivist Iolanda Weisz, a date with Fotheringham a lot of thanks.
And since president Davi d Strangway has blessed our
holiday season with the impending doom of yet another
tuition fee hike, we give him a lump of coal.
There's one prominent campus figure missing from
this list. And to him we give promise of the amount of
publicity he deserves.
Good luck on exams. See you next semester.
In our editions of July 20, 1988 and August 10, we
published, respectively, a news story and an editorial
dealing with a complaint made to the B.C. Human
Rights Council against "Systems The Club" by the Chinese Varsity Club. In our story we reported a CVC
representative's statement that the evidence of Systems'
manager would not be believed, and in our editorial we
asserted that Systems' policy of not admitting people of
Asian origin was wrong.
These statements suggest that the complaint made
by the CVC has been ruled on and upheld by the B.C.
Human Rights Council; we wish to state unequivocally
that no such determination has been made by the Council, so that the complaints made against Systems have
not been found to be justified. We greatly regret any distress or embarrassment that our statements may have
caused to System's The Club and to Robert Dale
McRitchie, the club's manager.
the Ubyssey
December 2, 1988
The Ubyssey is published Tuesdays and Fridays
throughout the academicyear bytheAlmaMaterSociety
of the University of British Columbia. Editorial opinions
are those ofthe staff and not necessarily those ofthe
university administration, or of the sponsor. The Ubyssey is published with the proud support of the Alumni
Association. The Ubyssey is a member of Canadian
University Press. The editorial office is Rm. 241k ofthe
Student Union Building. Editorial Department, phone
228-2301; advertising, 228-3977.
Every Who
Down in Who-ville
liked Christmas a lot...
But the Grinch,
Who lived just north of Who-ville,
Did NOT!
Katherine "Grinch" Monk hated Christmas! "There
is no Santa," she told Tim Bird-Who. "Is too, snot,"
Bird-Who whined in response to another attack from
-Catherine Monk. Daroy Vogel, Laura May, Peter
Prongos, Paul Preto and Roseanna Ditmars cried and
continued on page 12
Deanne Fisher:
Robert Groberman:
Katherine Monk:
Mandel Ngan:
city desk
CduiArtd*SM Cmt-S,
(Lane ewf &-f
Jhi$' ZntWMtt/i's
fceaaft ^^J«,y<~lw6j friary.
Drivers abuse
spaces for
I am a disabled Fine Arts
Creative Writing student
who has classes in
Buchanan E. Most mornings I am able to park in one
of the two slots allocated to
the Handicapped across
from the building. Sometimes, however, I have to
park by the Faculty Club, or
even farther, because one of
the spots is taken by a person with no Disabled parking decal or placard. When
my arthritis flares up, walking the extra distance can be
a real hardship. Or when
the roads, sidewalks and
walkways are slippery with
wet leaves, rain, or slush.
Often people park in one of
these two places while waiting for a passenger from a
nearby building. I've had to
ask them to leave, and let
me park so that I can attend
classes upstairs.
Another great concern
is with people who block the
entrance to the East Mall
(coming from Chancellor
Boulevard and Crescent
Road). Almost every morning, there is some type of
vehicle parked at the entrance waiting for someone.
It inevitably blocks the traffic flow, cutting off access to
the parking areas along the
East Mall, across from
Buchanan E. Again, I've had
to stop my car, get out, and
ask them to leave. Some
refused, and I've had to back
up and drive around from
the opposite direction. Oth-
The Ubyssey welcomes letters on any Issue. Letters must be typed and are not to exceed 300 words In length. Content
which Is judged to be libelous, homophobic, sexist, racist or factually Incorrect will not be published. Please be concise.
Letters may be edited for brevity, but It Is standard Ubyssey policy not to edit letters for spelling or grammatical mistakes.
Please bring them, with identification, to SUB 241k. Letters must Include name, faculty, and signature.	
ers have used abusive language and made obscene
UBC students, their
families, and visitors should
be aware that there are no
waiting areas along Crescent Road or East Mall, and
that they shouldn't be impeding the traffic flow or
access to parking along
While most disabled
students do not expect special treatment from classmates, faculty or staff we do
appreciate the few privileges which the University
extends to us.
Uzonka K. Deminger
Bring back
the real
I am disappointed, but not
surprised to see that David
Way has been sucked in by
the massive corporate
propaganda machine. (November 29) Santa Claus is
not an agent of the communists—he is obviously a
lackey of the Wall Street
capitalist imperialist pig-
As evidence, I submit
that our modern image of
Santa Claus can be traced
back to a 1930's Christmas
ad campaign by that most
capitalist of organizations,
the Coca-Cola Corp. Santa
wears a red and white suit,
not because of any historical
traditions, but to advertise
the Coca-Cola colors!
Since this time, Santa
has been used as a front to
stimulate consumer demand  at  Christmas  time
and to obscure, with a veneer of kindness and generosity, the most ruthlessly
competitive season of the
year. Even our own millionaire Premiere is getting into
the act, by promoting the
Claus myth in his film "Sin-
terklaas Fantasy." Would
Vander Zalm do anything
that wasn't "good for business?"
Therefore, don't be
swayed by the scare tactics
of Mr. Way or his associates.
By allowing ourselves to
"buy, buy, buy," we are giving in to the corporate mentality. Bring back the real
spirit of Christmas—love
and generosity! Bring back
the real Santa!
Graham Cook
Lighten up,
let the
bells toll
C'mon folks. This is university—our last chance at silliness before it's considered
really silly. Let's not start
griping about a few bells,
even if they were the product of the scheming minds of
those dastardly 'geers. "For
Whom the Bells Tolled"
(Nov. 25) claims that those
students "hunching over
their books in preparation
for exams" may have been
disrupted. OH dear, those
two or three people must
have been quite annoyed!
To dispel any suspicion
of bias, I openly state that I
am a member of that faculty
which is the natural arch
enemy of those evil engineers. However, I applaud
their musical feat—it was
imaginative and clever.
And, most importantly, no
one was hurt. For a faculty
reputed for tankings, kidnappings and the exploitation of minorities such as
homosexuals and women,
this stunt was refreshingly
Sure, bill them if you
must, but that faculty that
loves to be hated fills an
important role at this university—they provide
friendly rivalry which is a
vital part of university life:
Chich Turner would be
proud. We enjoy such folly
as a relief from serious R.W.
(Real World) stuff. So, take
out your ear plugs, listen to
those bells, and curse those
damned 'geers. But for
heaven's sake, don't take it,
or yourselves, so seriously.
They're all geeks anyway.
Victoria Goodeve
Arts 4
Food bank
needs friends
The Arts Undergraduate
Society Council would like
to thank the staff of The
Ubyssey for your recent efforts to cover the campus
activities of student societies. Raising awareness
about the activities of our
society such as the Arts
Food Bank Drive is important to our efforts to revitalize the Arts Faculty. Coverage in The Ubyssey helps us
reach not only Arts students
but also other students
around the campus.
Mike Lee,President
Arts Undergraduate
December 2,1988 OP-ED
Native culture precious
I would like to address the naive and/or narrow-
minded Michael Doll about his recent letter to the
Ubyssey (No Favours for Natives, Nov. 29).
First of all, Michael, we live in Canada, a country which embraces the "multi-cultural ideal".
Many culturally-based curricula are funded by our
government to encourage preservation of a large
diversity of cultural backgrounds. At the present
time, many French Roman-Catholic schools which
teach "the basics,"
as interpreted
through Roman-
Catholic ideals and
the French language, are funded
by the Canadian government. Native students, on
the other hand, have been forced to endure the traditional White Anglo-Saxon Protestant education,
although they often have problems learning within
a format which includes domination of discussion by
a single person (i.e. the teacher, or themselves when
asked to lead in class discussion). Because of their
egalitarian upbringing, native children function
much more comfortably if they can communicate
one-on-one with their teachers or work in groups
where they can control when they will talk.
Michael, what would be "disastrous" about a
school system that allowed native students to learn
easily, and not be alienated by unfamiliar learning
Secondly, a very important part of preserving
cultural pride and identity is to preserve native
languages. Contrary to your beliefs, a rare language
is more precious because ofthe fact that itis rare. To
deny the legitimacy of First Nation languages as
second languages for native U.B.C. students is to
deny that the continued existence of their cultures
should be important to them.
Next, I would like to ask you, Michael, how
anyone can think that our textbooks are not racially
biased! Do you remember any books from your
educational career in which a main character was an
Indian? Anon-white? I don't, either. (Ihave noticed,
though, that some elementary schools are now adopting more "multi-culturalistic" readers.)
As for your paragraph asking why we should
preserve Native Indian culture when we have not
made a similar effort to preserve "Elizabethan" or
Mesopotamian culture...(sigh).. I should ignore it;
but Michael ..."Elizabethan" refers to an
ERA and the Meso-
potamians were
GONE before us Canadians had anything to say about it! Should I also point out that the
English still have many remnants ofthe Elizabethan
ERAleftin their culture, and we, of English ancestry,
are living proof of that fact?
Lastly, the "social problem" not discussed in
your letter is that of your white supremist attitude.
To suggest that native Indians scrap their culture for
yours (not ours - or mine!) is a callous insult -
especially since THEY are the ancestors ofthe original inhabitants of this country-not the English or the
As you are a person that would so willingly
erradicate all traces of an ancient culture, it follows
that you must not value the benefit of history upon
our own, nor that understanding of other cultures
promotes tolerance and enriches our lives. Your idea
that people cannot live harmoniously while embracing different values and religions - that separate cultures must be phased out or locked out, sounds
suspiciously like some key ideas found in "Mein
Kempf, a document which a person with no use for
history, such as yourself, would not know about.
Bev Hutter
Arts 4
Unwinnable civil war
fragments Mozambique
I read with great interest R.
Bruce Wiltshire's masterpiece of
invective. His critique with regard to the 13 year old civil strife
in Mozambique was even more biased than that of Mary. He attacked Mary McAlister's article
with the precision of Soviet backfire bombers raining bombs on
Afghan guerrillas, and with the
imagination of a shark sensing
blood. That aside, Mary's article
and his letter both
disappointed me -
the first for its one-
sidedness and lack
of background information, the latter for its meanness and its abysmal depths of misinformation.
Here are some facts one
should keep in mind.
It's been thirteen years since
Mozambique won its independence from Portugal, after a long
and bloody struggle. Unfortunately the war has not ceased
since then. The Marxist regime of
President Joaquim Chissano is
fighting an unwinnable war
against the rebel Mozambique
National Resistance Movement -
or RENAMO - which is supported
by South Africa. Besides devastating much of the countryside and
paralyzing the nation's agriculture, the war has displaced more
than three million Mozambicans
internally, put millions of people
at risk of starvation, driven some
900 000 civilians into the neighboring countries - Swaziland,
Tanzania, Zambia, Zimbabwe,
and Malawi - and indirectly
crippled the economies of the
countries in the region. For instance, Zimbabwe and Zambia pay
an extra $150 million a year to
reroute goods through S. Africa
because they cannot use
Mozambique's roads and rail lines
- which are constantly sabotaged
by RENAMO - to bring their exports to the Atlantic  ports  of
Nacala and Beira.
Bruce Wiltshire's definition of
the Mozambican government as
being "despotic" and that the government rules by "brute terror
and force" is true to some extent.
The Marxist government human
rights record is deplorable. According to Amnesty International's 1985 report, the government regularly detains, without
trial, suspected government oppo
nents. Even the former President,
Mr. Samora Machel, admitted
that the armed forces had for
sometime been operating secret
detention centres. *~
Freedom of speech, assembly,
and religious practice are fundamental to the individual. The
Marxist government's early record suggested that in its drive
toward absolute power, it did not
hesitate to trammmel on the
rights of its own people. For instance, Mozambicans' rights -
those which we in the West take
for granted such as the right to go
to church, to set up a business, to
travel, or to just simply meet in
groups - were sharply curtailed or
bannned altogether. As a result,
the economy tumbled and many
people who might otherwise
stayed neutral, sided with the
But the government deserves
some credit for its recent change of
heart, reflected in its move to end
state-church confrontation and its
passing laws that lift some market
restrictions. The Catholic church,
Jehovah Witnesses, and Islam all
have made a comeback. Henceitis
not so "despotic" as it once was.
The letter quotes Bruce as
saying, "the NMR controls 80% of
the country... NMR controlled ter
ritory is a haven where citi zens are
free to work, farm, speak and worship as they please." To be fair to
Mary, I must say that all of these
are nothing but propaganda.
NMR does not really control any
territory and hence can not allow
people under its jursidiction to
vote. Unlike Savimbi's UNITA
which has a broad, secure power
base of at least two fifth of Angola,
Renamo's 20 000 strong rag-tag
guerrilla force, originally a mercenary
force created by the
Rhodesia, could ill
afford direct combat
against government forces.
In April of this year, a report
released by the State Department
charged that RENAMO could
have murdered as many as 100
civilians during the past two years
- the violence is reminescent of
that committed by the Pol Pot
regime of Cambodia - and a recent
study by UNICEF estimated that
RENAMO has displaced at least
460 000 students and 7350 teachers in the period between 1983 to
Obviously, RENAMO could
not afford to give the civilians
under its control - if it does control
any - the freedoms as outlined
above by Bruce, for if it does, its
citizens would gladly vote with
their feet.
The tragedies of the conflict
spread to Mozambique's neighbors as well. A vivid example is the
tiny country of Malawi, the world's
eighth poorest nation, that literally sinks under the weight of
starving refugees.
Squeezed in between hell and
the devil, the Mozambican civilians continue to suffer.
Hai V. Le
Hai is a chemical engineer
who specializes in
world affairs.
Survival In the
20th century
The peace movement is an anachronism.
Yes, nuclear weapons still sit alert in their silos
and yes, far, far too much money is spent on the military.
For all of humanity's knowledge, technology and
abilities, we are still barbarous, violent and destructive.
But all that should be obsolete. Most people in
North America don't want aggressive, bristling national defense systems. But only a few speak up
against that insanity because their lives are fine. For
some reason, they trust their leaders not to unleash a
nuclear holocaust.
The masses don't challenge defense-spending policy because they can't see themselves involved in any
kind of conflict.
That's the difference between the danger of nuclear war and the most ominous threat to humanity-—
environmental contamination.
Nuclear war is possible. The environment is being
destroyed now.
We in North America enjoy the most opulent lifestyle in the world. We are the biggest energy consumers in the world, and the biggest polluters.
North Americans live like there's no tomorrow;
and there might not be. We are like sheep peering
down the ends of our noses, munching thoughtlessly
on the grass before us, not realizing that the grass is
dying and the desert is encroaching from all sides.
How can anyone continue to live with the same
recklessness as always when the world's scientists
plead for drastic measures to control the destruction
ofour environment?Bow can anyone hope for a bright
fixture, a family, and grandchildren, knowing what
they will face? How can governments keep spending
billions and trillions on military toys and junk when
the poisoning of our planet is a far greater threat than
any hostile nation?
It's absurd. It's a great big joke.
North Americans need some facts. Forests and
lakes are dead or dying right now, all over the world,
from acid rain*That*s a fact* Most ofthe chloroflouro-
carbons responsible for destroying the ozone haven't
even reached the ozone yet. That's a fact. If carbon dioxide emissions are not vastly reduced immediately, a
global warming will devastate the world as we know
It's happening right now. Drought in the American
Midwest. Flooding in the Sudan and Bangladesh. Unusual and disastrous changes in weather patterns
that can only be attributed to the millions of tones of
pollutants we dump into the atmosphere each year.
People must be educated and North America must
lead the way. Even though our education system is
sloppy and inefficient, we must lead the way. Who else
will? Most of the world worries about surviving the
immediate future. Never mind industrial pollutants,
the third world is clear-cutting and burning forests to
keep warm and feed its ever-growing population.
The world's populace must be taught how to live in
order to ensure the survival of the human race. In
North America that means a complete change in lifestyle. It means doing away with automobiles. It means
resource management and stopping the use of a huge
assortment of harmful products. And it means diverting money to wbere it counts: educating the public
about what needs to be done, research to find cleaner
fuels and less damaging industrial processes and
cleaning up the mess already created.
In the third world* it means teaching birth control
and proper farming methods. It means educating
people to the extent that they can decide their own
Education is the key to ensuring the survival of
future generations, and North Americans must lead
the way*
By Sean Kelly
December 2,1988
G       U
Match these signs with their meaning:
Baggage Claim, Baggage Lockers, Bar, Car Rental, Coffee Shop,
Currency Exchange, Customs, Elevator, First Aid, Molson
Canadian sold here, Immigration, Information, Mail, No Entry
No Parking, No Smoking, Parking, Restaurant, Shops,
Smoking, Telephone, Ticket Purchases, Toilets, Toilets Women.
December 2,1988


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