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The Ubyssey Sep 6, 1995

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Array Publishing almost continuously since 1918
What's Inside
for September 6, 1995
News
TEXTBOOK SHOPPING just got
simpler, as the AMS Used
Bookstore moves into the UBC
Bookstore ...II
THE DREAM IS DEAD and the
AMS is still evaluating what's left,
as the ambitious SUB renovation
plan runs athwart of reality .. ./3
A NEW OPTION presents itself
for struggling students: a new BC
university that doesn't have any
academic entrance requirements
...IX
DRASTIC CHANGES to
provincial and federal student
loans will affect you directly. The
details on what's new, what's in,
and what's out ...15
PASTA PROMO targets students,
as HMV gives out students'
favourite (?) foodstuff ...15
WORMHOLE: This date in
Ubyssey history ...II
The Summer in Review
For those that weren't here or
(gasp!) didn't read our Summer
Ubyssey issues, we bring you up
to date on what went on      ...16
Student Loan Feature
What's new in student aid, and
the chronology of how the system
evolved to the present state
..710-11
IS THE AMS GIVING UP TOO MUCH?
Coke is it at UBC
Culture
CD REVIEWS of Urge Overkill,
Papa Wemba, Raggadeath ..712
MOVIE NIGHT AT THE UBYSSEY
means reviews of upcoming and
recent releases, including To Wong
Foo, The Prophecy, The Brothers
McMullen and more       .. 712-14
FRINGE FEST PREVIEW    ..713
NEW COMPILATION CD benefits
rape crisis centres ..715
PLAYS: The Madman and the Nun has
fun with insanity .../21
Sports
FOOTBALL KICKS OFF as the
T-Birds beat the U of Alberta
..717
UPCOMING EVENTS IN UBC
SPORTS highlighted in the
Ubyssey Sports Calendar       ...118
SHRUM BOWL fever is coming,
as UBC and cross-town rivals
SFU prepare to face off     .. 719
A special thank you to
everyone who helped
out on and voted in last
January's referendum.
We wouldn't be here
without you.
by Matt Thompson
For UBC students, Coke is it
— or if it isn't, it soon will be.
The Alma Mater Society
(AMS) and UBC administration
are in the process of finalizing a
contract that would give Coca
Cola exclusive control over the
university's beverage market.
The university asked the AMS
to enter into negotiations last
April as a means of raising extra
revenue. "They realized that 30%
of the volume of pop sales [at
UBC] are being sold by the
AMS," said student union Presi-
"We want to
provide better
services... This is
an excellent way
to do that without
either raising
prices or raising
student fees"
— Janice Boyle,
AMS President
dent Janice Boyle. "And to have
an exclusivity deal where you
could generate additional income, they would need to include
us."
Eighty per cent of soft drinks
currently sold in the SUB are
Coca Cola products, and the
AMS already has a "preferred
customer" deal with the corporation that entitles them to a special purchasing rebate.
Under an exclusivity arrangement, the size of that rebate
would increase. According to
Boyle, "it is going to be substantial - over $100,000 per year for
the next ten years."
Boyle says the contract will
raise funds for the cash-strapped
society. "[The beverage contract]
generates a fair amount of additional income with no real
change in what we're already doing.
"We want to provide better
services... This is an excellent
way to do that without either increasing prices or raising student
fees."
Not everyone in the AMS Executive is sure the deal with Coke
is such a good idea. AMS Coordinator of External Affairs David
Borins earlier approved of the
contracts in principle, but now
appears to be having second
thoughts.
"I'm not sure that a student
union should be entering into
deals which centralize the power
of multi-national corporations,"
he said on Sunday.
"By accepting deals like this we
just send out the wrong message
in public-that's my biggest concern."
Borins agrees that the AMS
could use the extra money, but
at the same time wondered
"whether that large chunk of
money is blinding people in their
decision... If you sell yourself for
a buck or a hundred thousand
bucks, you're still selling yourself."
There also appears to be confusion among councillors as to
whether the contract still requires
final approval by council.
Following a confidential in
camera session Aug. 2, Council
voted to approve the exclusive
beverage contract in principle.
"Council has given their consent," Boyle said. "They gave [Director of Finance] Tara
Ivanochko, [AMS General Manager] Bernie Peetes and myself
the authority to negotiate the final agreement. And that means
to negotiate it and sign it."
"I'm not sure that a
student union
should be entering
into deals which
centralize the power
of multi-national
corporations."
— David Borins,
AMS Coordinator of
External Affairs
Borins says that's not his understanding. "Whatever agreement they've negotiated, it still
must come before Council," he
said. "My understanding is that
there is still the opportunity to
completely reject this deal."
Boyle, however, was unequivocal on this point. "Council will see the final agreement for
information, but at that point they
have already delegated the authority of negotiating the final
agreement to Tara, Bernie and I.
And once Tara, Bernie and I
agree to a final document, the two
signing-officers at that point can
sign it and [they] don't have to
go back to council for final approval."
PHOTO BY SIOBHAN ROANTREE
PEPSI MACHINES could soon be an extinct species on campus.
AMS expansion dream dies
by Sarah O'Donnell
Students looking forward to
fresh AMS bagels in the SUB
this year will have to look elsewhere for their carbo fix.
The bagel shop scheduled to
appear in the SUB concourse
isjust one part of the AMS's extensive four year renovation
plan that has been scrapped after years of consulting expenses.
"The grandiose four year
plan that they [the architects
and student union] had in place
should be considered dead,"
said Director of Administration
Am Johal. "We have to start
thinking of other opportunities
for the long term."
The original long term renovation plan approved by the
AMS last April included the addition of commercial space to
the concourse, a retail street on
the west side of tbe mate floor,
and increased office space for
student services and duos.
However, since the AMS
rents the SUB from the university administration for $1.00 a
year, renovations were contingent upon successful renegotiation ofthe lease. The main barrier was the Iraiovarive Projects
Fund (IPF), which limited AMS
commercial space to its current
size. The entire plan was based
on the assumption that lease
negotiations with the administration would be concluded in
the student union's favour.
In retrospect Johal said the
negotiations "proved to be
fruidess" and that the Student
.Union's assumption was premature, considering that "the
amount of money that went
into creating this four year plan
was probably close to
$100,000."
Negotiation delays cost the
AMS both time and money.
Changes to the concourse scheduled to begin on May 20 were
postponed untiljuly 20. As a result, students will have to deal
with construction on the main
floor of SUB until the end of
September.
The appearance ofthe SUB
is now the renovation committee's number one priority. Johal
believes the appearance ofthe
SUB is more important than
ever because ofthe new building going up by the village.
"That building could potentially do irreparable damage to
the student union," he said, referring to the retail complex
that will house McDonald's. Room-Mates
Room mate wanted to share one
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on bus route. $435/month incl.
730-0098
Au Pair
Large furnished basement room,
near UBC-Spanish banks, in
exchange for babysitting of
school age children, pet care and
some light housekeeping. Separate entrance & simple kitchen.
224-2480
For Rent
Large Clean 1 bedroom basement
suite on Larch at W. 45 Ave.
$600+ util. Must be quiet, clean,
non-smoking & no pets. 263-7939
For Sale
For Sale: condo at UBC Hampton Place (Westbrook Mall &
16th) Elegant 2 bedroom, 2
bathroom, 1020 sq. ft. Exceptional quality facilities. Display
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patio. Asking $279,000. call 224-
4977
Furniture
Double Futon bed- excellent
condition. $200 Call 689-2937
September Special: Fully
finished Futons for $79.00 (incl.
tax, double). Call M.D. Futons at
730-1348- Free Delivery!
Tutoring
•Aladdin Tutoring Services*
Certified B.C. school teachers.
ESL, TOEFL, proofreading all
subjects. Competitive rates. Call
730-9889
Other Services
Pat's UBC Mobile Bike
Repair
Parts, service, tuneups, at
your door. Free Estimates.
Four years experience.
733-6887 Leave message.
Help Wanted
27 students to lose weight. Get
paid daily for world wide business expansion. Second language
an asset. Call Ash at 438-0220
Personals
SWF (Short White Female) seeks
mate. Should be tall, skinny &
stunned. I'm tired of tile floors
and Mazda stick shifts. If you
can offer me a new locale and
better scenery, meet me in the
Gallery.
Wanted to Buy
Wanted: a used typewriter in good
condition. Call 822-6681
Your Ad Here!
Lonely Heart? Need a roomie?
Need to get rid of your futon?
Have a service you want to
advertise? Put it in a classified.
Call The Ubyssey. 822-6681 or
822-1654.
The Ubyssey
Classifieds
Deadline: 2 days
before publication
(Friday for the Tuesday issue, Wednesday
for the Friday issue)
Price: $5.25 (+ GST)
for first 15 words
$0.80 (+GST) for each
five words over
Payment
in advance
by cash, cheque,
VISA or
MasterCard
Call
822-1654 or
822-6681
'tween Classes
Tell us (and the rest of
campus) about your
upcoming campus
event!
Come in to SUB 24IK
and fill out a form
telling us When,
Where, What, Who
and Why (and any
other info you're
compelled to share)
and we'll publicize it in
this space!
Deadlines:
Friday at 3:30 iL:
Tuesday's paper
Wednesday at 3:30 for
Friday's paper
Space in this section
is limited!
Announcements in
'tween classes are run
on a space available
basis.
Conservation of Wildlife • 2095: A Mars Odyssey • Skeletons Plus • Election Stock Market • Far Out Pharmaceuticals for Kids!
UBC IS OPENING ITS DOORS TO BRITISH COLUMBIANS THIS FALL!
UBC
OPEN HOUSE
It's An Odyssey of over 300 events in three days! Don't miss it!
Call for Volunteers
Participate and receive:
• a distinctive Open House T-shirt
• refreshments
• an exclusive invitation to
the post-Open House party
AN 6t>YSSEY
Be part of the event of the year! Sign up with a friend! Make new ones!
We're looking for 420 friendly and outgoing people who are proud and supportive of their association
with UBC. A variety of opportunities to work with the public are available. Depending on the position, little
or no experience is necessary. You'll get the inside scoop on Open House at our orientation and training
sessions. We need your help for a minimum of four to eight hours.
Interested? For more information on volunteer opportunities, contact:
• AMS Volunteer Services, Room 100D, Student Union Building (822-9268)
or visit our booth between 10:30 am and 2:30 pm at these locations
• Sedgewick Library, September 5th to 8th Supported by:
• Student Union Building, September 11th to 22nd
Applications accepted until September 27th.
VOLUNTEER
VANCOUVER
SERVICES'
Enter the draw to win one of a growing list of prizes for volunteers only!   Prizes include:
•computer • software • Vancouver Grizzlies tickets • text books • movie tickets • gift certificates • dinners for two • UBC sweatshirts
Computer Mediated Communication • From El Dorado to Guernica: A Hispanic Odyssey • Dunk-the-Dean • Apple Festival news
One stop shopping for used textbooks
by Charlie Cho
Students buying textbooks this
fall will have the opportunity for
"one-stop shopping" thanks to a
new arrangement between the
UBC Bookstore and the Alma
Mater Society (AMS). For the first
time ever, AMS used books will
appear on the shelves alongside
UBC Bookstore's texts.
"[The UBC Bookstore] took
the initiative," said AMS Used
Book Store Director Joe Cheng.
"They came by and offered this
setup. They said they're willing
to work in conjunction with us."
In previous years, the AMS
operated their used book consignment service for students in the
SUB; however, the bookstore
lacked a permanent location.
Cheng says the move to the UBC
Bookstore will solve this problem.
UBC Bookstore Director
Debbie Harvie agrees that the
change will make book-buying
easier. "It seemed to be an awful
lot of work for students to end up
buying books, bringing them
back, not knowing if used ones
were available."
Students can choose to either
sell their used books to the UBC
Bookstore for a flat rate or put
them on consignment with the
AMS. If the text is currendy being used, the UBC Bookstore will
pay students half the current
price. Otherwise, Harvie says
they'll be offered the book's market value, which ranges from
"nothing, if nobody in North
America wants it, to 20 and 30
percent."
Students who opt for consignment with the AMS get to choose
the price of their texts. The AMS
takes a 20 per cent cut. "That's
just merely to pay for staffing,
overhead," Cheng said.
"The benefit of consignment is
you're buying from another student. You're also not paying the
GST."
AMS texts will be marked with
a bright pink sticker and will be
sold at the UBC Bookstore just
like any other book.
"They just take it to the UBC
cashier. It's rung through [as a]
regular transaction. We work with
the Bookstore afterwards to figure out how much we get,"
Cheng said.
Though the AMS and the
UBC Bookstore will both be sell-
UBC BOOKSTORE AND AMS JOIN FORCES: Used books can now be purchased all at one place.      andy bonfield photo
ing used books, both were keen
to play down the competitive aspect.
"The benefits definitely outweigh that small bit of competition," said Cheng. "We're trying
to work together with the university to improve relations. I think
it's a great example of how we can
work together."
Harvie agreed on the issue of
competition. "The AMS has always been selling used books.
We've always been selling used
books. The reality is none of us
can get the supply for the demand
that's out there... It's not changing who's selling how much. It's
just making it all in one location."
Both groups plan to evaluate
the joint operation toward the
end of October. If the arrangement is a success, it may become
permanent.
SUB concourse: better than drugs
by Sarah O'Donnell
The Student Union Building
will never be 'normal' again, according to AMS Designer
Michael Kingsmill. For the price
of $39,000 students walking
through the SUB concourse will
be able to enjoy "improved light
levels" with "metaphoric mean-
ing."
Dwight Atkinson, M.A.I.B.C,
said that the troughs of lights replacing the old lights in the concourse are as much about mental
journeys as visibility. "Architects
see their roles as social artists,"
said Atkinson, "so we've chosen
to talk about the journey that students encounter while they are
being educated and we've made
that analogous to a journey
through space."
An AMS ad in the Aug. 24,
1995 issue of The Ubyssey stated
that when students travel underneath the troughs of light they will
experience "long arcs in outer
space, landing zones on the
moon, hiking trails over difficult
terrain, and sailing courses responding to winds on the ocean."
The architect Baker McGarva
Hart, Inc. designed the shades
covering the lights so that students could transcend normality.
"No more drugs on campus —just
look at our images and you'll be
transformed," said Atkinson.
Lighting in the conversation pit
has also been designed to "engage
the mind." Next time you look
up, expect to see two incandes
cent spheres - each eight feet in
diameter — shining down on you.
"They're more general surfaces
that refer to the details in the concourse," Atkinson said. "On one
hand you're traveling, on the
other hand you're contemplating.
So it's our attempt to try to make
a connection intellectually between travel and contemplation."
These huge spherical dishes
are supposed to represent the
realms of celestial and terrestrial.
Atkinson said students should ask
themselves: "is your head in the
clouds or are your feet on the
ground?"
Expect the "unearthly optimism" advertised by the AMS to
be available by the end of September.
What's different about the SUB?
Although SUB renovations did not go exactly as the AMS
planned Oris summer; students can still expect to see some
changes.
• The entire concourse has been given a new paint job. AMS
designer Michael iGngsmill said that the painters just have
a few finishing touches left
• Ceiling finishes have been done to eliminate the water stains
• New tile and carpet will be laid down throughout the upper
conversation lounge
• Tbe old, stained, browny-beige furniture will be refurbished
• The conversation pit wiJH have hardwood floors
• There will be a new lighting system in both the conversation pit and the main concourse
• A speaker's podium and public address system will be permanently established in the conversation pit for rallies and
information exchanges
• SUB's north wall will be covered with a mural created by
Fine Arts students. Expect to see the mural started towards
the end of September.
22
^^^^^^7
^^
ALMOST READY FOR TAKEOFF: The refurbished SUB conversation pit is your one-stop shopping spot for space travel, astral journeys, and engaging contemplation.
COURTESY OF BAKER MCGARVA HART, INC.
Wednesday, September 6, 1995
The Ubyssey news
The Ubyssey asked
students the question:
"What was
the first thing
you did when
you got to
UBC?"
photos by Andy Bonfield
Katie Sinclair
Science 1
James Katz
Religious Studies/Science 4
Leslie Zednai
Oceanography/Geophysics
"We unpacked and went to "I hopped the fence at the "I parked illegally and got
a BBQ." (sung in unison pool and went for a schwim a whole slew of parking
with friend Chani Campbell),    [sic]." tickets."
Jeff Kiyooka
/*~-\
Y
Be A Roads Scholar
Take Transit To
UBC
■4    !, 4.-1
There are some intelligent reasons to take transit on your road to higher
education: affordability and convenient, direct routes. And by taking transit,
you will be reducing auto emissions and traffic congestion.
*n*f
A Quick Course In Economics
If you ride transit to campus, you can pay
cash, or purchase tickets and passes in
advance. FareSaver tickets are sold in
money-saving booklets of 10, and if you
take transit every day, you can really save
with a monthly FareCard and a Fast Trax
transit strip. The Fast Trax strip affixes
to your student
I.D. so you can
upgrade a
One Zone
FareCard to
travel through
all zones. Plus,
Fast Trax will be valid
for multi-zone savings on the new West
Coast Express service, coming this
November. Fast Trax strips, monthly
passes and tickets are available at your
student union.
Your Best Route To Campus
Here is a complete listing of transit service
to UBC by area:
From West Vancouver
The #258 operates from Dundarave and
Park Royal to UBC during rush hours.
From North Vancouver
The #286 operates from the Highlands area
to UBC during rush hours. Or, catch
SeaBus to downtown and board the #85 for
express service to UBC during the morning
rush hour.
From Downtown Vancouver
The #4 on Granville Mall and #10 on
Hastings or Granville Mall operate frequently to campus all day. Or from Waterfront
SkyTrain Station arid Burrard Street, the
#85 provides express service during the
morning rush hour.
From SkyTrain
From Broadway Station, the #9 provides all
day service and the #31 provides express service during the morning rush hour. From
Joyce Station, the #41 provides all day service.
Within Vancouver
The #4, 9, 10, 25, 31, 41, 49 and 85 routes
all provide direct service to UBC. (The #10,
31 and 85 operate as express only along portions of their route and boarding locations
are limited.)
From Richmond
The #480 provides direct service during rush
hours. Or, catch any bus travelling to downtown Vancouver and transfer to the #41 at
Granville and 41st Ave.
From Ladner & South Delta
Catch any bus travelling to Vancouver and
transfer to the #41 at Granville and 41 st
Ave.
From North Delta, Surrey, White Rock,
Langley, New Westminster & South
Burnaby
Catch any bus travelling to SkyTrain and
transfer to the #9 or #31 at Broadway
Station. Or, from Scottsdale Mall, catch the
#311 and transfer to the #41 at Granville
and 41st.
From North Burnaby
Catch any local bus travelling to Kootenay
Loop and transfer to the #10. Or, catch the
#25 from Brentwood Mall.
From Coquitlam, Port Coquitlam,
Port Moody,  Maple Ridge
& Pitt Meadows
Catch any bus travelling to downtown
Vancouver and transfer to the #4 or # 10 at
Granville and Hastings.
Information At Your Fingertips
Here's how to find out when bus service
operates to and from campus:
• Departvre times are listed on the bus
stops at the University Transit Exchange.
• Schedules are available through UBC's
Internet system. 'View
~ UBC is on-line 7
days a week,
accessible from
any campus or
home computer
connected to the
network. Pick up
information from
Computing &
Communications (CSci 100), or
e-mail help@ucs.ubc.ca, or call 822-2008.
Free timetables are available at the
student union and many other campus
locations.
Call Talking Yellow Pages at 299-9000,
local 2233 for prerecorded transit
information.
Call BC Transit Customer Information:
521-0400.
BC Transit £S
Vancouver Regional
Transit System
Science 1
"I went down to Wreck
Beach."
EASY U?
ROYAL ROADS RECYCLED
by Diana Stein
As of September 1995, BC has
gained a new university — sort
of. The former Royal Roads Military College has been reborn as
Royal Roads University and will
offer a variety of courses in conjunction with Camosun College
and the University of Victoria.
The revamped institution is
presently unable to offer degrees,
but is accepting students who
would otherwise be denied university entrance. Registration at
Royal Roads differs from other
universities because it operates on
a first-come, first-served basis and
accepts applicants regardless of
educational background.
Non-matriculated students -
those not enrolling in programs
leading to a degree - are not required to meet the usual entrance
requirements of either Camosun
College or UVic, or even to have
a high school diploma. Nonetheless, a story that appeared in the
August 23, 1995 edition of the
Victoria Times-Colonist, reported that Royal Roads students
will receive full credit for courses
completed under the joint arrangement.
When contacted by The Ubyssey, staff in the registrar's offices
of Royal Roads and UVic seemed
uncertain whether non-matriculated students would actually be
granted full credit for those
courses.
In conjunction with Camosun
College, Royal Roads is offering
courses in environmental technology and business administration. UVic has a much larger
menu which Royal Roads students can choose from that includes anthropology, english, history, math, philosophy, political
science, psychology, sociology,
computer science, fine art, art history, music, theatre, and creative
writing.
Prior to student orientation and
registration on September 5,
Royal Roads had already exceeded its target of 200 students.
There is still space for an additional 400 applicants. news
No Way Out
Feds to change student
loan bankruptcy rules
Pasta to the People!
by Matt Thompson with files
from CUP
The federal government is
planning to make it harder for
anyone with an outstanding student loan to declare bankruptcy.
A proposal recently sent to the
federal cabinet for final approval
would amend the Bankruptcy
and Solvency Act so that debtors unable to repay their student
loans would be ineligible to declare bankruptcy for a period of
2-10 years after finishing school.
The proposal is similar to legislation that currently exists in the
United States. In the U.S., student loan debt is exempt from
bankruptcy discharge for five
years after a student leaves
school.
Alex Usher of the Canadian
Alliance of Student Associations
(CASA) said a two-year restric-
AMS axes
'95-'96
emergency
student loans
by Sarah O'Donnell
Students facing a financial
emergency in the 1995/96 school
year will be unable to look to the
AMS for direct assistance. A notice taped to the Director of Finance's door states that the Alma
Mater Society's (AMS) Emergency Student Loan program has
been "temporarily discontinued."
Tara Ivanochko, director of finance, said in the notice that in
order to give out more loans,
"outstanding loans must be repaid. This has not been happening and the fund has become
greatly overdrawn."
In previous years emergency
student loans were given to students on an honour system. Anyone in a financial crisis who received a loan was expected to
pay it back as soon as possible.
The flaw in the AMS loan program was that it could not ensure
that students who borrowed
money fulfilled their part of the
bargain.
AMS Vice-President Namiko
Kunimoto said it was important
to understand that the AMS has
not cut emergency student loans
out of its budget permanently,
and that the society will still try
to assist students as much as possible.
Students in need of emergency financial assistance can still
receive aid through a similar program run by the university.
Kunimoto said the AMS would
refer students to the university
and would be able to co-sign for
any student receiving an emergency loan from the university.
tion on student bankruptcies is
not unreasonable given recent
changes to the Canada Student
Loan Program.
Under the terms of the new
program, students temporarily
unable to make loan payments
are eligible for up to 24 months
of "interest relief."
"In the first two years [of the
repayment period], there's no
good reason, with interest
relief...why people should be
bankrupting themselves. When
they do default, that's hurting
other students, really."
Usher said a five or ten-year
restriction, however, would be
unfair. "Why should student
loans be put in a different category than house or car loans?"
he asked.
Michael Gardiner of the Canadian Federation of Students
also says it would be unfair to
single out student loans.
"The bankruptcy laws exist for
people who are being crippled by
debt," he said, "and they should
be available to all types of loans."
The bill is expected to be
ready for reading sometime in
the late fall.
The amendments to the act
could be approved as early as
January of 1996.
by Andy Barham
"It isn't Live Aid, it isn't Farm
Aid ... it's Makaroni Aid!"
This innovative back-to-
school national promotion is designed to give students their own
"'survival kit' consisting of their
favorite comfort food, makaroni
and cheese."
At least, that's how the promo
blurb from HMV Canada outlines its latest promotional gimmick: "Free Makaroni" with purchases of certain specified CDs.
According to Colin Thomson,
representing the advertising firm
NextMedia, "The majority ofthe
target that we were catering to
was the university/college crowd.
Everybody knows that their staple is macaroni and cheese, right?
So, we just kind of hit on that and
decided to call it makaroni."
But is macaroni and cheese
really the favoured comfort food
of most university students? Said
Thomson, "I think that students
probably truly despise it. But, it's
so cheap that it's comforting."
HMV stores do not give free
promotional packets of Makaroni
with just any CD, though. Various major record labels and even
a few indies constitute the 28
CDs at the heart ofthe campaign,
but no particular music style prevails. According to Thomson, the
only criterion was that they be
"newer releases".
Is the promotion a success? "So
far," said Thomson, "there's been a
lot of positive reaction to it, particularly in Toronto. The response is
pretty good. People think it's a riot"
But in the opinion of some students, the marketing pitch may do
the trick. "It's a bit of a gimmick,"
said Amy, an Education student, "but
it's free macaroni, so it can't go
wrong. If I wanted macaroni and I
wanted the CD, I'd buy it"
Bon appetit!
ROYAL BANK
^Registered trade-mark of Royal Bank ol Canada
• Royal Bank ol Canada, licensee ol trade-mark
^ajil-800 ROYAL,9-9
(1800 769-8599) summer news
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
The summer's news;
by Alison Cole
Two months and seven
issues later, here are the
highlights from this summer's
campus news, as reported by
The Summer Ubyssey:
The McEwen Report:
The McEwen Report, written by
hired independent investigator
Joan McEwen, contains allegations of racism and sexism in the
graduate program of the UBC
Political Science Department. The
report, released June 21, made
seven recomendations which
UBC President David Strangway
said would all be implemented, including the recommendation to
suspend admissions to the graduate program in political science.
Strangway made no promises to
take further action beyond the
recommendations.
Dean of Arts Patricia Marchak,
as well as UBC's Department of
Psychology, both publicly slammed the report for its perceived
"methodological flaws."
At a special meeting to be held
on September 7, the Faculty of
Arts is scheduled to meet to
discuss a resolution calling for the
re-opening of graduate admissions in the Political Science
department.
New AMS Budget:
AMS Council approved the
AMS budget for the 1995/96
fiscal year, which includes cutbacks totalling $50,000. Due to
AMS government overspending
of more than $200,000 last year,
budget cuts of $50,000 will be
made in each of the next five
years to pay off the deficit. The
majority of cuts take place in food
allowances for AMS volunteers,
UBC ROADMAP TO COMPUTING
tion to Networked Compul
FREE Lectures and Hands-On Tutorials
A FREE lecture and tutorial series has been created to help familiarize
faculty, staff and students with the computing facilities at UBC. A
companion document to the lecture series, entitled UBC Roadmap to
Computing, will be for sale at the UBC Bookstore. All lectures will
take place in the Instructional Resource Center (in the same building
as the Woodward library) in the rooms noted below. For more information about the lecture series, please call 822-5809, or send e-mail to
roadmap @ cs. ubc. ca.
Electronic Mail:   Sept. 6, 12:30 - 1:30 (Rm. 4), Sept. 14,4:30 - 5:30 (Rm. 6)
Netinfo/Interchange:   Sept. 6, 4:30 - 5:30 (Rm. 6), Sept. 14, 12:30 - 1:30, (Rm. 6)
Intro to UBCLD3 (UBC Library's on-line catalogue);  Sept. 7,12:30-1:30 (Rm. 6)
Intro to UNIX:   Sept. 7,4:30 - 5:30 (Rm. 6), Sept. 11, 12:30 -1:30 (Rm. 4)
Intro to C:   Sept. 8, 12:30 - 1:30 (Rm. 4), Sept. 11, 4:30 - 5:30 (Rm. 6)
The Web and News:   Sept. 8, 4:30 - 5:30 (Rm. 6), Sept. 13, 12:30-1:30 (Rm. 4)
UNIX Editors:   Sept. 12, 12:30- 1:30 (Rm. 1), Sept. 15,4:30-5:30 (Rm. 6)
LaTeX (UNIX text formatting language):   Sept. 15, 12:30 - 1:30 (Rm. 4)
X Windows (graphical user interface for UNIX):   Sept. 13, 4:30 - 5:30 (Rm. 6)
NEW this fall, we are offering two FREE hands-on tutorials: Introduction to UNIX, and Introduction to C programming. Each tutorial
is 2 hours in length, and you will work on an X Windows (graphical)
terminal running UNIX. As space is limited, please phone 822-0557,
or send e-mail to roadmap®cs.ubc.ca , in order to reserve a space.
This program was made possible through the support of The Teaching and
Learning Enhancement Fund and The Department of Computer Science.
Living the Disillusioned Life
with actor Ron Reed and the jazz vocals and
piano of Christine Duncan and Bob Murphy
GateOne's Regular Forum on Faith
Sun., Sept. 10       7:30 PM     Regent College
(University Blvd. @ Wesbrook Mall)
Before:  BBQ, Jazz Fusion Trio    After:   Cafe
PASSION & REALITY
as well as severe cuts in AMS
Programs and CiTR.
Asia Pacific Ventures:
The AMS council voted July 12
to take legal action against former
Pacific Post editor Chung Wong.
Pending approval by their lawyers, the AMS plans to sue Wong
for $10,000 to recover money
loaned to Asia Pacific Ventures
(under which Wong was employed by the AMS) and has yet to
be repaid. Wong denied any
liability for the overspending of
the money, which the AMS says
is as high as $24,292, and claimed
that he never received any payment for his work for the AMS.
Student Loan Changes:
Federal and provincial governments are no longer guaranteeing loans to students. Under a
new "risk sharing agreement"
effective this August in British
Columbia, three participating
banking institution, CIBC, the
Bank of Nova Scotia and the
Royal Bank, are processing both
federal and provincial government loans. Students with loans
at other financial institutions will
be required to transfer their debt
over to one of these banks before
negotiating new loans this year.
SAC Resignations:
Conflict within the AMS
Student Administrative Commission (SAC) caused two SAC
members to resign from their
positions. The conflict arose
when AMS Director of Administration Am Johal asked council to
override a decision SAC had
already passed. SAC had decided
that The Ubyssey Publications
Society (UPS) would be required
to pay full commercial rates on
all room bookings in the SUB.
Johal went against this decision
and asked Council to give the
UPS bookings at 50% off the
commercial rate during a meeting
on June 21. The resigned
members, Ruta Fluxgold and
Roger Watts, expressed their dis-
CHRIS NUTTALL-SMITH PHOTO
AMS PRESIDENT JANICE BOYLE faces her first media scrum following the
release of the McEwen Report on June 21.
satisfaction with Johal's decision
to ignore SAC and said they were
no longer able to effectively work
with him.
Major UBC Benefactor dies:
Walter Charles Koerner, a
major UBC benefactor, died July
20 on his 97th birthday. Koerner
served on the Board of Governors
from 1968 to 1972, and then
convinced the federal government to share in the cost of the
$4 million UBC Museum of Anthropology. The Leon and Thea
Koerner Foundation, established
by his brother Leon and his wife,
provides scholarships, bursaries,
research support and grants to
UBC.
AMS Referenda:
The AMS plans to hold a referendum during the 1995/96
school year asking students to
create a bursary fund for child
care, and reallocate the $7 Varsity
Athletics fee paid annually to
fund AMS services and intramurals.
TRIUMF Layoffs:
Layoffs have occured in the
TRIUMF particle physics laboratory and the National Research
Council Institute for Machinery
Research (IMR), at the south end
of Westbrook Mall. Staff cuts are
to offset a 15% cut in federal fund-
continued on page 9
STEVE WILSON (LEFT) and Anita Braha, lawyer for the CSS, at the CSS's press
conference after the McEwen report was made public
CHRIS NUTTALL-SMITH PHOTO mews of yesterday & today
Worm hole ^g««ji
worm«hole (wurm'hol') n. l.The hole made by a worm, as in plants, timber, etc. 2. A rift in the space/time continuum resulting in temporary temporal displacement
Thirty years ago in The
Ubyssey...
September 14, 1965:
• The AMS successfully lobbies for students to pay tuition in
two-term installments. Students
had traditionally paid one lump
sum in September.
• Engineers stage unsuccessful
car-parking prank. Three unruly
'geers send 464 bogus letters to
out-of-town students seeking
campus parking spaces.
• UBC's library becomes automated. For the first time, UBC
students are able to use a card and
sign out books on the "Inhuman
Blue Monster" (IBM) rather than
filling out coundess call slips.
Twenty years ago...
September 2, 1975:
• First-year students were
Trees cleared
for lawn,
AnSo next
by Charlie Cho
12 cedars on the north campus
were cut down last Wednesday to
clear the way for a big grass lawn
The university said the trees along
NW Marine Drive were removed to
make way for "a grand front lawn or
meadow linking the upper and lower
sides of Marine Drive" and will be
replaced with smaller trees.
About half of the small faculty
parking lot near the Anthropology/
"In the long term, the
cohesion of the
campus ... would be
better served if...
Anthropology and
Sociology were
demolished"
-UBC's 1992 campus
plan
Sociology building will also be eliminated.
"Now that we've built the Rose
Garden parkade, it really doesn't
matter," said Parking and Security
Services Parking Manager David
Miller.
Campus Planning Information
Officer Kathleen Laird-Burns said
the long term plan for the next 20 to
25 years includes the removal ofthe
Anthropology/Sociology building.
"In the long term," stated UBC's
1992 campus plan,"the cohesion of
the campus and the interplay between faculties would be better
served if the old residences [Isabelle
Maclnnes Hall, Anne Westbrook
Hall, and Mary Murrin Hall] converted to accomodate Anthropology
and Sociology, were demolished to
make room for an extension of the
public lawn."
treated to a semi-fictional account
of the perils of life at UBC in The
Ubyssey's Student Guide to the
University of British Columbia.
Otherwise known as "Pauline
goes to college," the 20-page
guide follows the misadventures
of a buxom, blonde, co-ed as she
adjusts to life at UBC.
Fifteen years ago...
September 9, 1980:
• AMS boosts its beer prices.
The price of a bottle of domestic
beer goes up 15 cents to $1.15,
despite the fact that Pit revenue
was double what the AMS anticipated.
• UBC students face the worst
housing crisis in a decade as thousands scramble to find accommodation. Emergency measures find
temporary housing for most students, but they have more diffi
culty finding permanent living
space.
• A Ubyssey takeover attempt by
two AMS executives fails after
more than 40 Ubyssey staffers attend a May council meeting and
present council with a petition
signed by over 400 students supporting freedom of the press on
campus.
• Glowing skeletons come tumbling out of UBC's closet, as The
Ubysseyreports on the university's
dumping of unknown quantities
of radioactive waste into BC's
coastal waters during the 1950s.
Wanna check out
the bound volumes
for yourself? Visit
us in SUB 241K.
NO OEG&MGr f
'IF SOU RNPTV
BOOK tDU WAN
T6K£ IT TO THE
GoMPureeTOM
CHKKEP OUT.
too MU5T PEOC
SOITA0L£  IP-
SUCH AS r*S6K
AMP   NOTAfOIO
rejMT5,ETC.
TD   MINIMIZE  WE4
AMP TEAE ANP »
PLEAse vo Nor
OPEK  BOOKS.
kV
PAULINE'S 1975 ADVENTURES take
over the body of a previous year's fresh.
her to the main stacks, where she trips
UBYSSEY FILE GRAPHIC
Scotia Banking Advantage Plan
It'll help you afford
the necessities in life.
Save money with the only no-lee student hanking plan.
If double cheese is becoming a major expense, perhaps it's time you discovered the advantages
of banking with Scotiabank.
Scotia Banking Advantage" is the only plan that gives you a daily interest chequing account, a
ScotiaCard™ banking card and a Classic VISA* card* all for no fee. We also offer Scotia Student
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And while all this won't make you rich, it'll at least keep your pepperoni cravings under control.
So drop into any Scotiabank branch for full details or call 1-800-9-SCOTIA.
Scotiabank is a participating lender in the new B.C. Student Assistance Program.
B.C. and Canada Student Loan advances are available at all Scotiabank branches in B.C.
Scotiabank S
«R«gii»«i^.i»d»-niartc<TlieBin>o.NowScafcniTiMlfrni^
Wednesday, September 6,1995
The Ubyssey Authorized ( .impus Dealer
^SBSS^j iJill J"-" jig ONE BOX) AND *■»
AP^'sMflSo processor ^^ W SOfTWAM W«*       OFT.
.66/33 MHZ 68 CO^ ^00&' %^ .PRE-LOADED AW***
.75 MHz P°^uwscan °r HB FOHT PACK, ^ EAS^
,WEGW!EQOM> S«B> CD-R°M ^^ SYSTEM 7.5 R-s
^^^So?"r""ANCWW «^ SAVEANADDIT.ONAU
.BU0 -»* STEREO SPEAKE ^f^EjP. '*Sg&. ^DB^*5 Of AP«
^^H *****       vsr^So^r        _...Mtll.5.oow» summer news
BIKE LOCKERS, BIG MACS, NO PARKING AND HOT DOGS
Review of the summer's news continued
continued from page 6
ing. TRIUMF let 15 staff members
go, while another 22 accepted
early retirement.
AMS Bike Lockers:
The AMS is planning to provide bicycle storage locker spaces
for students starting this month.
The lockers will be located at the
north end of War Memorial Gym,
giving bicycle commuters easy
access to showers at the facility.
The lockers will be rented for $ 15-
$17 per month and are aimed at
reducing bike thefts and damage
on campus.
RecFac to open in September:
The Student Recreation Centre,
located on the north side of
Mclnnes Field, will open to
students this month. It will include
three full size gyms, a weight
room/fitness center, martial arts
studio, dance studio, daycare
facilities and administration offices.
Most ofthe intramurals department
will move to the building, and the
Athletics Department Varsity
program will use the facility as well.
Lastjanuary the Board of Governors
voted to extend the $40 annual fee
charged to students (to pay for the
facility) since students have not been
contributing the refundable fee.
AMS steamed over hot dogs:
UBC Food Services unions and
AMS representatives are not
happy with the appearance of Mr.
Tube Steak hot dog vendors on
campus. Canadian Union of Public Employees (CUPE) local 116
representatives said that the contract with Mr. Tube Steak is in violation with the Food Services employees' collective agreement (by
contracting out work already performed by their members). Since
UBC Food Services already sells
hot dogs on campus, they feared
Mr. Tube Steak would create
competition that would in turn
theaten union jobs. Colleen
Garbe, treasurer of CUPE 116,
vows that they would get Mr.
Tube Steak off campus.
Don't pay with cash:
UBC will no longer accept cash
in payment for tuition. Due to the
risk of armed robbery, UBC
Financial Services has decided it
will only accept payments in alternative forms. Am Johal, AMS
D of A has expressed concerns about
the move. Starting this month, tuition
can be paid via debit card, cheque,
or cash at any Bank of Montreal
location and by telephone - anything but direct cash.
AMS joins CASA:
At their August 2 meeting,
AMS Council voted to join the
newly formed Canandian Alliance of Student Associations
(CASA). CASA, formed last
MR. TUBE STEAK'S move onto campus has both the AMS and CUPE steamed.
January to lobby for undergraduate student concerns, will
now represent a total of 11
schools and 200,000 students.
Graduate Students' Society Director of Student Affairs Steve
Wilson stated that the AMS
would be doing a disservice to its
graduate students by joining the
alliance since CASA is only interested in undergraduate affairs.
CASA National Director Alex
Usher said that membership (in
EVERY STUDENT'S DREAM - McDonald's Golden Arches will soon grace the campus of UBC.
JENN KUO PHOTO
Quality
Value
• Full & Self Serve Copies
• Full & Self Serve
Colour Laser Copies
• Self Serve Computers
• Fax Service
• Binding
• Plus a lot more...
University Village
2nd Floor 2174 W. Parkway
UBC, Vancouver, B.C.
224-6225
fx: 224-4492
Open 7 Days a Week
Mon-Fri S'9 I Sat-Sun 10-6
THE DENTAL CLINIC
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is accepting application
for patients needing
EXTRACTIONS
including wisdom teeth
and minor surgery.
Please contact
822-4216
for an appointment
CASA) would be of real benefit
to UBC.
Building means less parking:
Construction for a new forest
sciences center to be built on the
B3 parking lot near Thunderbird residences has sparked
debate. The building of this new
facility will eliminate approximately. 200 parking spaces on
campus, which could cause
further difficulty for students
travelling to UBC by car. However, Tom Berger, community
representative on the Board of
Governors said the new forest
sciences building far outweighs
the loss of student parking
spaces.
New poster policy pending:
At the October 15 Board of
Governors meeting, UBC will
be seeking the approval to regulate postering on campus. Under
this new policy, postering of any
kind on building exteriors, telephone poles, lamp and sign
posts, trees, and outdoor
benches would be prohibited, as
well as the placing of flyers and
leaflets on parked vehicles. Also,
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CHRIS NUTTALL-SMITH PHOTO
Plant Operations would remove
any posters not placed according
to regulation, and people who
violate this policy would be made
to pay for any costs incurred by
the removal. The goal is
apparently to lessen "visual pollution" and establish a better system
of posting on campus.
Big Mac attack:
McDonald's will be coming to
UBC this year sometime between
November and January. The restaurant will (eventually) be housed
in the building that is currently
under construction in the University Village. The retail complex
will also contain a photocopy
center, a grocery store and food
fair. Students and nearby residents
are concerned about-potential
problems, including the threat to
businesses in the SUB, parking,
and noise and odor problems.
Come find out al the
news we can't print
Join The Ubyssey's
News Team.
Visit us at SUB 24IK.
I!
UBC Student Special
WASH
8.
1 your Duds in our Suds
o
o
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c
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Experience the difference!
Great music & decor, drinks &
snacks. Friendly helpers all the
time. Cappucino bar open
in Sept. - so you can make friends.
7 Days: 7:30 am -10 pri?
UBC's nearest Beau Clean Centre
• Professional Dry Cleaning
• like Mum's Drop Off Laundry
• 60 Coin Op Washers/Dryers
Gold Coin
Coin Laundry
11   3496 West Broadway* 739-0598   i
12 blks. E. of Alma on S. side - rear parking ' feature on student aid
The New Student Loan Program:
What You Need to Know
by Matt Thompson
The federal government announced major changes to the Canada
Student Loans Program this summer.
As of August 1, 1995, the federal
and provincial governments no
longer guarantee student loans.
Instead, under a new "risk-sharing"
agreement, participating banks will
assume full responsibility for loan
collection and losses in exchange for
a 5 per cent "risk premium."
The Ubyssey asked Alex Usher,
National Director of the Canadian
Alliance of Student Associations
(CASA) and Michael Gardiner, BC
Chairperson of the Canadian
Federation of Students (CFS), to
comment on the most important
clauses in the new agreement.
REPAYMENT PERIOD
Old Program: Borrowers were put on
a nine-and-a-half year schedule to
repay their debt.
New Program: The repayment
period will depend on the terms
borrowers negotiate with their
financial institutions.
Usher said that the banks will
likely start students off on the same
nine-and-half-year repayment
schedule. The banks may actually
prove to be more flexible in extending this period than the government
"There is incentive for the banks to
have a little flexibility, particularly in the
early years when there's a lot of money
still to be recovered," he said.
But Gardiner worried that banks
may offer this added "flexibility"
only to those students best able to
pay: those able to provide either a
cosigner or collateral. "It may end
up being another example of a
change...that helps those that need
it the least."
INTEREST RELIEF
Old Program: Interest relief was
available only to unemployed borrowers.
New Program: Low-income borrowers are now eligible, and the
interest relief period has been
extended to 24 months.
Interest relief is intended for
borrowers temporarily unable to live
up to the terms of their repayment
schedule. During periods of interest
relief, the government continues to
pay the interest on your loan and
you don't have to make payments.
Usher called the change "a big
step forward. That's your key group:
peoplewith low or unsteady employment in their first few years after
graduation...I think it's going to
make a big difference, especially in
general default rates."
Gardiner agreed that the change
is a positive one. "It's a step that
recognizes the changing job market
and the transition period that takes
place before graduates are getting
into reasonable jobs."
In the past, low-income borrowers were often put on "outrageous" repayment schedules where
The Ubyssey
Publications Society
• Notice •
Society Membership Fee Opt-Out
for Students taking courses in both terms
or in first term only
In the 1995 January AMS elections, the students of UBC voted to
give The Ubyssey Publications Society a $5 per student pro-rated
refundable fee for the purpose of publishing The Ubyssey, the official
student newspaper at UBC. The Society is a non-profit society
incorporated in BC, composed of the students at UBC, and is democratically run by the students, through an elected Board of Directors
coming from the student body.
The Ubyssey Publications Society Fee is a voluntary fee collected
from all students at UBC. For $5 (pro-rated at 290 per credit for part
time students), the money is used by the Society to publish The
Ubyssey. This fee is collected as part of your student fees automatically.
If you do not want to pay this fee, you are able to opt-out of the fee
and receive a refund from September 6th to September 22nd
during the hours of 10am to 4pm.
There will be no cash payments— a credit will
be issued towards your second term fees.
Students asking to have their fees returned will be ineligible to
vote, be a candidate or hold office in the Society, and will not be
able to become voting staff members of The Ubyssey.
they borrowers simply didn't have
enough money to make loan payments and pay living expenses.
Gardiner said extended interest
relief may provide this group with
an option other than defaulting.
INTEREST RATES
Old Program: borrowers paid a fixed
interest rate over the entire course
of repayment. The rate was fixed
each year based on Government of
Canada 5-10 year bond yields + 1%.
New Program: Full-time students will
have the option of choosing between
either a fixed or floating interest rate.
The floating interest rate will be set
at Prime plus 2.5%. The fixed rate
will not exceed Prime plus 5%.
The bottom line, according to
Gardiner, is that students will pay
higher interest rates than they used
to. The option to choose a floating
rate over a fixed rate is, in his view,
of little benefit. "It gives students the
freedom to gamble, and I don't
know how it helps them beyond
that."
BC students will be offered
"interest shielding" for their provincial loans. The interest rate on
provincial loans was previously set
at prime plus 1%, but under the new
risk-sharing agreement, the banks
will increase the rate to Prime plus
2.5°/o. The BC government will
"shield" students from this increase
by paying banks the difference.
TOTAL LIFETIME
BORROWING:
Old Program: Students were eligible for up to 520 weeks of student
loan assistance.
New Program: 340 weeks. This
works out to ten years at two terms
per year. The feds say the change is
part of their plan to ensure students
"complete their studies in a timely
manner."
Gardiner said the new limit may
penalize some part-time students.
"It's geared toward forcing students
to complete their studies in a full-
time course load manner," he said.
For students taking courses in
addition to working or parenting,
340 weeks could be an unreasonable
length of time to finish a degree.
Usher said the change will affect
a relatively small percentage of
borrowers, but added that the
reduced cap may pose a problem for
students who decide to change their
discipline midway through their
studies.
ELIGIBILITY
Old Program: Full-time students
must take 60% of a full course load.
Part-time students must take between 20% and 59% of a full course
load.
New Program: Course load limits
are unchanged, but students must
pass 60% of their classes in order to
be eligible for loans the following
year.
On the surface, the changes are
minor. Under the new risk-sharing
agreement, the government—not the
banks-will still decide who receives
student loan assistance.
But Michael Gardiner worried
that may change when the current
agreement comes up for renegotiation. "I think what we'll discover going into the next set of
negotiations is that if [the banks] are
losing money...there maybe calls for
[banks] having some say in the
setting of eligibility requirements."
He pointed to Nova Scotia as an
example, where 800 students were
told by banks that they did not
qualify for student loans despite
meeting the Nova Scotia government's eligibility criteria.
Usher isn't as worried. "The
[argument] of people opposed to the
bank deal is, 'We don't like this bank
deal because we're afraid the next
one might be worse.' That's a little
weak, I think."
DEFAULTS
Old Program: If you missed three
loan repayments in a row, you were
considered a defaulter. The government paid the lending institution (ie,
the bank you negotiated your loan
with) the outstanding principal and
accumulated interest on your loan.
The government then tried to recover the loan through private
collection agencies, or, if unsuccessful, the income tax system.
New Program: The banks themselves are responsible for collecting
loans. They can renegotiate the
terms of your repayment, or they can
seize your assets.
"I think the only people that are
going to feel upset about this, really,
are people who may be getting a free
ride," said Usher, referring to the
small portion of borrowers that can
afford to make their payments but
fail to do so. "We'll have to watch
out for banks being overly aggressive," he said. "But I don't see any
intrinsic reason why having the
banks after you is going to be worse
than having the government after
you."
Gardiner also pointed out that
banks will essentially be using the
same private collection agencies
used by the government.
Student Fee Payment Options
Effective September 1,1995
Please note that Financial Services will no
longer accept cash as a form of payment
for tuition fees effective September 1, 1995.
This change is being made for safety reasons, so students and our counter
staff will not be handling large amounts of cash and be exposed to the
possibility of robbery.
Students can pay tuition fees via:
• Touch Tone Telephone. Contact your bank or
credit union for details.
• Payments by bank Debit Card - located at the
tuition fee counter in"Brock Hall.
• Payments by cheque at the tuition fee counter,
by mail, or at any branch of the Bank of Montreal.
• Cash payments will be accepted, even for
students without bank accounts, at any branch of Bank of Montreal. Erosion of the
Program
1963
When campaigning for Prime
Minister, Lester B. Pearson
promised a package of non-repayable scholarships, but when
elected brought in a system of
repayable loans.
1983
The Secretary of State promised that a reformed student aid
plan would include grants. It
didn't happen. Instead, a part-
time student aid plan was brought in, along with interest relief,
and an increase in loan limits.
1985-1995
There were no up-dates to the
Parental Contribution Tables for
ten years following changes
made in 1984-85. Parents were
therefore expected to contribute
a higher portion of their disposable income to their dependent's
education, due to erosion on
their income caused by inflation.
1989
The government began to tie
lifetime borrowing to successful
completion of programs. The
lifetime limit of 520 weeks was
altered to a maximum per degree, although exceptions were
to be considered.
1991
The federal government slapped an administrative fee on
student loans, reducing the benefits to students. The 3% tax was
paid up-front, reducing the student's loan by the same percentage. After persistent lobbying, it
was finally removed in 1993.
1993
The 6 month interest-free period after graduation was eliminated through the passage of Bill
C-76.
Knowing the limitations ofthe
Canada Student Loans Program
and wanting to secure a piece of
the student aid market, the Bank
of Montreal announced its own
'version' of student loans. Other
chartered banks followed suit.
Student   Aid    in    Canada   and   the
Canada    Student    Loans    Program:
A Chronology 1963 -1995
1994
While the government increased the weekly loan limit for
the first time since 1984-85, it
stated that it would only provide
a maximum of 60% of a student's
total federal/provincial aid. Because ofthe way that the BC program was designed, students using the provincial program who
had high need and were eligible
for grants, received less grant
than they would have under the
old guidelines. A BC government
move to increase maximum loan
limits recovered some portion of
the grant lost through the federal
change.
Legislation was passed enabling the government to enter
into risk-sharing agreements with
the banks.
1995
Elimination ofthe federal government guarantee of loans was
announced. From now on, students having difficulty paying
offtheir loans would have to deal
with the banks instead of the government.
Trend Towards
Privatisation
1964
The trend towards privatisation occurred when the Canada
Student Loans program was first
brought in. Instead of establishing its own lending agency to
provide student loans, which it
had power to do, the government
elected to provide student loans
through private chartered banks.
1989
The government hired a private consulting agency to perform an internal evaluation of the
efficiency of the loans program.
A number of privatisation options were recommended.
1990
At a meeting of the National
Advisory Group, the Canadian
Bankers Association suggested
that student loan debt information be made available to credit
bureaus and other creditors.
More stringent collection procedures, including taking students
to court and garnisheeing of
wages, were also proposed.
1992
In its 1992 Lending for Learning document, the government
outlined its plan to establish a
Special Operating Agency to administer the program. The idea of
sharing the risk of defaulted loans
was also proposed here.
1993
Private discussions with the
banks occurred about them assuming the risk on new student
loans.
1994
On May 9th, Bill C-28 was
passed, enabling privatisation of
student loans.
1995
On August 1, the Liberal government announced elimination
of the government guarantee of
loans and the privatisation of
loan collection in exchange for a
risk premium.
Source:
Canadian Federation of Students
■TDBC AWARDS-
Important Notice for Students Interested in
Work Study
Work Study Applications are being accepted from
students from all provinces, provided they have:
•applied for student loans and
• received their Notification of Award
Effective 1995/96, international students
may also apply for the Work Study Program.
Students may pick up a Work Study application
at the front counter of the
Awards & Financial Aid Office
Main Concourse, Brock Hall.
Application Deadline: October 1
Work Study Drop-in Sessions
will begin on Tuesday, September 19,1995.
Sessions will be held on Tuesday afternoons at 1:30 and
Wednesday mornings at 9:30
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WITH THISAD'TIL SEPT 3035 Musicolumn
Urge Overkill - Exit the Dragon [Geffenl
Urge Overkill have always been slavish adherents to style.
Their lifestyle is as important to them as their songs. The thing
is that they've always managed to keep that delicate balance.
Their songwrrting hasn't suffered due to time spent on their
wardrobe.
Exlt\sUrge's follow-up to 1993's Saturation, their first major-label release. Saturation was a wonderful mot of tense and
edgy tunes contrasted with positive anthems. For every Turn
your back on me* there was a 'Positive Bleeding' to even things
out Perhaps Saturation was the expression of Urge's Joy at ff-
naUy being able to live a true rock star lifestyle.
Exit strikes me as the product of the darker side of rock
stardom. Notes of optimism are few and far between. 'Need
Some Air* and The Mistake', in particular, take a perverse pleasure in chronicling lives ruined by rock'n'roll.
I'm not saying that Exit is chockabtack with stinkers. Far
from it, all of the songs are wen crafted, as once again Urge use
the Butcher Brothers (better known for working with hip-hop
acts) as producers. But listening to more than three of Exit the
Dragon's songs is to immerse oneself in concentrated despair
and dissatisfaction. I'm hoping they put some prozac In their
martinis for the next album. -Andy Ferris
Papa Wemba - Emotion [Virgin]
Zaire native Papa Wemba says in his liner notes that he
wanted to gain international exposure with Emotion. So like
once-traditional African artist Hugh Masekela did in the late
'80s and early '90s. Wemba hired a pop producer and injected
some of the Top 40 sound into his work. But producer Steven
Hague (of Pet Shop Boys, New Order, and Erasure fame) leaves
Emotion -r albeit rigidly produced and chock full of keyboard
sounds - soulful, and on a few tracks, downright beautiful.
Emotion is packed with myriad musical styles and voices
from samba to near-tachno to traditional, even hymnal And while
Wemba's talent is so much more obvious in his live and
unproduced performances, the sad reality is that the packaged
sound sells. Perhaps Emotion will bring him the international
notoriety that he so deserves. - Chris Nuttall-Smith
Raggadeath - Why Ask Why [Virgin]
It seems many rap artists become has-beens the instant
they have achieved any kind of commercial success. Remember vanilla Ice and Hammer? Most of us would like not to. Sounding like a combination of Salt N* Pepa, NWA, the Beastie Boys,
and Metallica, Raggadeath is likely to avoid this fate with their
alburn, Why Ask Why. ;
Raggadeath is a real band, and not merely a group of rappers with a DJ. Michie Mee,the band's best vocalist, provides
the lead vocals for the tMe track and *One Life', catchy tunes
which are likely to have mass appeal. Rapper Koze leads 'Live
and Direct* and 1 Am What I Ami' through their obscene lyrics
into that fast, rough rap tradition exemplified by NWA and Ice-T.
This sounds like party music for 16-year-old gang members.
Raggadeath's mixture of heavy metal and rap may represent
the last stand for musical boundaries left over from the 1980s.
-Janet Winters
1995 - 96 SEASON
To Have
by Julius Hay
Hungary, 1929:
forty women are charged
with murdering their husbands
September 27 - October 7
Tiger *s Heart
byKitBrennan
a story of a woman who lived as a man
January 10-20
The Importance of
Being Earnest
byOscarWilde
the funniest, most subversive comedy
ever written for the theatre
November 15-25
Sophocles'
Antigone
a tale of the Bosnian wars
March 13-23
Tii© University of British Columbia
BOX OFFICE 822-2678
AUDITIONS
FOR THE FREDERIC WOOD SEASON AND
THE DOROTHY SOMERSET SEASON
10am to 5pm Sat. Sept. 9th at Sun. Sept.10th
Info available in Room #207 Office of the Dept. of Theatre
in tit* world of ^ a dra$
ThanfcTfotBvw
t^^ieNewmai.
To Wong Foo, Thanks for
Everything, Julie Newmar
opens September 8 at Cineplex
theatres
by Peter T. Chattaway
From the morbid gloom of The Crying
Game to the outrageous camp of Priscilla,
Queen of the Desert, films about drag queens
in recent years have been riding the crest
of art-house popularity to the shores of
mainstream audiences.
It was inevitable that some awestruck
maven of mainstream culture would gather
these snazzy seashells and cobble them together to produce his own, considerably
tamer, version. In this ca"se, it's Steven
Spielberg. (One might argue thaf he anticipated the drag craze back mE.T. when Drew
Barrymore played dress-up with the-
wrinkled alien.)
To Wong Foo begins with a flamboyant
drag queen beauty pageant, hosted by none
other than RuPaul, in which the unlikely
winners are Vida Boheme (Patrick Swayze)
and Noxeema Jackson (Wesley Snipes). Before embarking on their road trip to the follow-up pageant in Hollywood, Vida and
Noxeema encounter Chi Chi Rodriguez (John
Leguizamo, who for my money is the most
convincing dragster of the three):Chi Chi, a
"Latin boy in a dress," has yet to be, in
Noxeema's words, "someone with too much
fashion sense for one genaer" — i.e., a bona
fide queen.
Vida takes pity on Chi Chi and invites her
to join their journey — much to Noxeema's
chagrin; but, before long their car breaks
down in Snydersville, a midwestern town
so drab and musty that a typically WASPish
Norman Rockwell painting might cause a stir.
Naturally, they take it on themselves to liven
things Up and paint the town a wild shade
of red (literally, more or less).
For the most part, the trio's adventures
are presented as nothing more than good,
clean fun. Chi Chi flirts innocently with_a
lovestruck farmboy, while Noxeema doles
out flashy '70s threads to the fashion zombies who populate this town (the cinematography gets noticeably sunnier once the
folk start dressing up).
Douglas Carter Beane's script is full of
beautiful zingers, but he displays a slippery
grasp on dramatic tension whenever things
get serious. He either cuts away from powerful scenes before they get realistically
nasty, or he resolves-his dilemmas with a
well-timed rescue. Vida & ca. strive to keep
their sexual identity a secret from the
townsfolk, but we never do see how the
' hicks actually react when they make the inevitable discovery. Instead, after several reels
of ignorance, everyone suddenly seems to
know who these women really are, but hey,
no one cares, right? It's like dipping a lit fuse
in Palmolive when no one's looking.
Not that To Wong Foo is meant to be particularly true-to-life. Indeed, from the magical redecoration of their hotel room to the
Cinderella-like missing shoe that taunts the
bigoted sheriff (Chris Perm), To Wong Foo
has the markings of a classic fairy tale. But
like most fairy tales, the entertaining facade
masks a more serious moral within. Rather
than accentuate the idiosyncfacies that set
this subculture apart. To Wong Foo bridges
the gap by presenting a world in which anyone — even a straight woman — can be a
drag queen.
If that helps the cause of tolerance and
acceptance, then To Wong Foo is all the more
enjoyable. But if drag becomes as commonplace as bubble gum and apple pie, will it
be as much fun?
The Underneath
at the Ridge September 8-14
by Andy Barham
Film noir ...
Nothing is what it appears to be on the
surface; as reality is dissected through the
unfolding of the plot, good guys blend into
bad guys, and women represent the ultimate
betrayal; ya just can't trust 'em! But then, in
classic film noir, ya just can't trust anybody,
especially not the curvy femme fatales one
usually finds parading sinuously through the
genre.
In this respect, Steve Soderbergh's The
Underneath, is true to its noir antecedent
CrissCross. There just ain't nobody ya can
trust, and not even the local policeman
(Adam Trese), brother of the main character,
Michael Chambers (Peter Gallagher, who
worked win Soderbergh before in sex Res &
videotape), is a good guy. The only serious
break with tradition is the more realistic and
markedly lessimisbgynistic development of
the film's main female characters (Alison
Elliot, as the film's heartthrob Rachel, and
Elizabeth Shue, as the unwitting dupe), The
mother role (Anjanette Comer) is a typical
film noir mum: not too bright, and unreservedly doting on her wayward son. She is
modernized, however, through her addiction to television.
Michael Chambers is an ex-gambler who
comes back to his hometown of Austin,
Texas, ostensibly to attend his mother's, wedding. His new stepfather (Paul Dooley) gets
him a job working for an armoured car company as a driver. During his absence, his
former wife Rachel, whomhe'drunouton
when his gambling debts
got outta hand, had taken
up with Tommy Dundee
(William Fichrner), a lpcal
nightclub owner alnd
small time hoodlum.
As the denouement of
the film - the robbery of
the     big     jackpot
armoured car — unfolds, the complexities
of the story and its
various motivations
are seen through an
artful series of flashbacks. Time is further distorted when
flashbacks occur
within flashbacks,
so that at odd moments we seem
to flash forwards
back into the
main   action,
rather in the
strange   and        -."vs/asa,* fn ;-?" "Win ^'mm
sometimes unsettling ^Uigin Cfcr ■/Qr
way one sometimes flashes back into a V3°fl-
heightened awareness of one's surroundings during a cannabis-induced rush.
Perhaps the most striking quality of the
film is Elliot Davis's cinematography (he also
worked on Soderbergh's King of the M%
which swerves from the humdrum, sometimes gritty realism of modern filmmaking
to an altered state of dreamy foreboding
througn a gnasuy nienamg oi oaa gameia
:^§K
angles and strange distorted lighting effects
(again/in keeping with the film noir tradition).
If the producers of Criss Cross had had
access to the technology available to modem filmmakers like Soderbergh, perhaps this
is the film they would have made.
Soderbergh has indeed done them proud!
Living in Oblivion
now playing at the Varsity
by Peter T. Chattaway
Ever since the Lurriiere brothers caught
their employees checking out of the film lab
back in the 19th century, directors have
loved to make films about the world of filmmaking. Some have even gone beyond the
wanking that is characteristic of the genre
to entertain their audiences, perhaps even
develop a theme or two.
Writer/director Tom DiCillo appears to
think that Living in Oblivion belongs in this
latter category. More directly, his film purports to lampoon the world of independent
filmmaking that has recently become so
popular (and a cast that boasts such indie
stalwarts as Steve Buscemi, Dermot
Mulroney, and James Le Gros certainly
doesn't hint the film's credibility). But the
film's focus is far too narrow — imagine
spending 91 minutes watching a director try
to get that perfect shot — and there is little
here to distinguish the off-screen dramatics
of Oblivion's movie-within-a-movie from the
hidden hijinks of any mainstream movie set.
Indeed, living in Oblivion relies on the
same sort of gimmicks that fuelled more opulent introspectives such as Francois Truffaut's
Day for Night. Booms dip into the camera's
frame, actors forget their lines (especially
when they are supposed to say something
along the lines of "I don't remember"), and
the discreet, postcoital tension between
grandstanding lady-killer Chad Pdomino (Le
Gros, in a role reportedly inspired by DiCillo's
bouts with Brad Pitt) and high-strung actress Nicole (Catherine Keener) threatens to
ruin their big scene together.
Beyond their spat, a hormonal charge
seems to course through ,the rest of the film
set. Nicole also happens to have a thing for
Nick (an unusually diffident Buscemi),. her
director. Meanwhile, Wanda (Danielle von
Zemeck), the assistant director, dumps the
punkish, black-bereted cinematographer
Wolf (Mulroney) unceremoniously between takes. (Nick
and   Nicole?
Wanda    and
Wolf? Gotta love
that alliteration!)
DiCillo mixes
things up a bit by
dividing his film
into three half-
hour sequences.
The first two start
out        normally
enough, but after a
string of tell-tale eccentricities, they turn
out to be the dreams
of a sleep-deprived
film crew the night be-.
fore they are to shoot a
dream sequence (ah! the
irony of it!). The final
half-hour is thus the
blandest of the three —
even   the   dream-se-
quence-within-the-movie
relies on little more than the
haggard resources of a heat-
up smoke machine and a droopy dwarf -
and it ends the film on a regretfully anticli-
Fringe Festival gets td stretch out in
new and more comfortable venues
The Fringe Festival
Alive on the Drive September 7-17
by Peter T. Chattaway
"We've moved!"
Fringe Festival Producer Joanna Maratta is justifiably ecstatic about the Fringe's new site. After
ten years spent in venues scattered along Main
Street, the Fringe Festival will begin its second
decade in a tighter strip along Commercial Drive,
between Hastings and Broadway.
According to Maratta, the change was long in
coming. "Over the last few years, we've identified
the growing problems of the festival being in the
Main Street/Mount Pleasant area that needed to
be addressed, and the biggest problems were the
fact that we had the traffic on Main Street and
Kingsway — we had a six-lane highway moving
through the site — [and] na green space.
"We had done some initial research throughout
different sites in Vancouver, but Commercial Drive
seemed to be the one that was in real keeping
with the festival atmosphere."
The new location has enabled the festival to-
move in a number of new directions. Most significant is the "festival centre hub" in Grandview Park
and its outdoor site. "We're doing street closure on
William and Napier streets, which are two streets
adjoining the park, and we've got the box office
in the park, and the info tents, merchandise, and
a full slate of street performers on both weekends."
Three locales - the Pirehall, Station Street and
Main Dance venues—remain trapped in the Main
Street orbit, but Maratta cites the "really comfortable venues" along Commercial Drive, such as the
Clutch and the WISE Hall, as a definite bonus.
In addition, Maratta mentioned that "all the
shops on the Drive are great. It certainly has the
types of amenities that people going to festivals
like to do before and after shows, y'know, bookstores, record stores, browsing."
A number of shows win feature the talents of
UBC alumni. Prominent among these are: The
Muse's Hemisphere, performed at last January's
Brave New Acts; the Shavian Cream Company's
adaptation of G.B. Shaw's In the Beginning; Delia
Ann Kehward's For the Love of Lucflfa; the clown
piece The Pookie Flukesters in Who Pooped the
Fluke?; two black comedies produced by Michael
Gazetas, LA. and American Hero.
The Fringe Festival kicks off Thursday, Sept. 7
at 5:30 p.m. with a parade down Commercial
Drive, officiated by master ribbon-cutter (and local MLA) Premier Mike Harcourt. The fun will continue in earnest 'til the 17th.
Warped Wednesday
XM.E»X3ti<5 Xl.oti&.
One is strongly tempted to say that the
film would have been a better, more acute
work if they had chopped off the final 55
minutes and peddled the remainingpericope
j»*1l tli© sttk*\rk—filxn ^iwi■■■■♦■
The Warped Tour
7 days ago at the Coliseum
by Ron Eichler
The day began at 2:00 with a
totally loud, unintelligible performance by some shmoes from
Deutchland named WIZO.
The rainbow-coloured 12-year-
olds then went to the main stage
where Orange 9mm were putting
on a kickass show. The kiddies
moshed for a song, but then looked
at their watches and realized that
nobody moshes this early in the
day.
A few minutes later I smelled my
first marijuana vapours, but for the
life of me could not find the source.
This seemed to be the unfortunate
trend for the day. And unlike
Lollapalooza, there was no herbal
ecstasy for me to sample. Damn.
There was a large section cordoned off for skaters to play where
there was also a monster half pipe.
None of the skaters were doing anything that impressive.
I then checked out a band called
Fluf. The lead singer was so old that
his songs actually had a tune. I
could have cried. I kind of even
liked them. I think I actually did cry
when they started singing about
Fender guitars and Ford cars.
At this point I went to see the
monster half pipe again, where it
became clear that the rollerbladers
were way better than the skateboarders. Of these, the best was the
sole female, Laura Connery. I don't
know anything about this kind of
stuff, so I let her write in my note
pad. (From Vancouver, age 29, three
years of vert, first female in Canada
to do vert, favorite tricks include
invert to fakie, back flip, fakie
McTwist, and front side grind. If
anybody can explain the above to
me, they get an autographed copy
From there we went to see No
Doubt. I liked them cuz they had
horns (a trumpet and a trombone).
Gwen, the lead singer, did this thing
tArbars eke urauU etarf a oiita arirl—
ish giggle, then lash out
all of a sudden. Backstage,
we argued over how to
peg her. She yelled at me
for first thinking she was
a Madonna wannabe, and
let out a huge "Noopooo!"
to any Courtney Love
comparisons, even though
she swears she respects
Courtney. She finally admitted to a very strong
Betty Boop influence.
After much discussion,
we'agreed that there was
no audience response for
just about anybody because (a) the median age
was 14, (b) everybody
was trying too hard to
look cool, and (c) house
lights kill the anonymity
that crowds need. Gwen thought
the show would have been better
off outdoors, but the promoters said
that the crowds at Lollapalooza the
last two years were equally laid
back.
Fast forward to Quicksand. Excellent band. Check them out.
Never mind why.
L7 was the band most of the
crowd, including 80% of the females, was here to see. The audience was there for them, but unfortunately, they were not there for
the audience. They were there for
their own fucking ego. I thought
PAT McGUIRE PHOTO
One o/tne Warped guitarists.
they put on a mediocre performance. An unplugged mic meant
no harmony on 'Pretend We're
Dead'. When a guitar player tried
to do the old play-into-the-amp-
for-feedback trick, a roadie
bumped into her. On the second
last song, a roadie brought out
measuring tape to see if the mics
were set at the right height.
The strangest thing, though,
was that no one noticed that they
sucked. Everyone was into them.
And all the 14-year-olds on the
bus ride home thought they were ■
great. Go figure^
i
UBC Symphony Orchestra &
- Symphonic Band
Do you play violin, cello, bass, clarinet,
euphonium or tuba?
p^pfApm uuitK tha UBC Ornhoetra or Band-
Credit or Non-Credit
822-8246 or 822-3113 Brothers and angels duke it out
The Brothers
McMullen
at Cineplex theatres
byJennKuo
How do you know when you
have found your one true love?
Written and directed by Edward
Bums, The Brothers McMullen   .
is a movie which tries to answer this question. The word
"try" is definitely the key word
here, as the movie doesn't
seem to be able to come up
with a credible answer.
The three brothers McMullen
are all struggling with romantic relationships and their commitment, or lack thereof, to Irish
Catholicism. Barry (Bums), the
middle brother, is scared off instantly when there is any mention of love or marriage. Patrick
(Mike McGlone), the youngest
brother, is a hopeless romantic but
he is confused about love nonetheless. Jack (Jack Mulcahy), the
eldest brother, is torn between the
"deep" love he has for his wife and
the alluring possibility of an extramarital affair.
This movie is supposed to show
how these three brothers interact.
I, however, was not fully convinced that these three men were
really brothers. Maybe it was the
acting, I don't know, but they
seemed like three friends rather
than three brothers. The only time
I was convinced that they were
brothers was when Jack walked
into the bathroom and asked
Patrick for advice while he was
sitting on the toilet.
This scene also exemplifies the
unconvincing nature of the acting.
The actors seemed like they were
just reciting their lines to whoever
was present in the room. The
characters also didn't seem to interact properly. Although there
was emotion in their voices, they
didn't sound real. But then again,
when a movie has a budget so low
that the director has
Somehow, this comic relief
doesn't really fit into the scene.
Then, in the next couple of
scenes, Barry cracks a joke with
every other line. And then there's
the banana joke/metaphor/we're-
getting-desperate-
fe»sssssa=
Bahnsonhislapjand
to cast himself as a character, I
guess one should be grateful the
acting worked at all.
The Brothers McMullen tries too
hard to fit its "warm hearted romantic comedy" billing. Right from
the start, it seemed like a joke was
being cracked every second just
so the movie wouldn't be too serious. The movie starts out with a
rather solemn scene in a graveyard; the newly widowed Mrs
McMullen is telling her son Barry
that she is finally leaving for Ireland to be with the man she really loves, after waiting for 35
years. Next thing you know, someone cracks a joke (someone,
please break out a barf bag!).
for-something-unconven-
tional to make this movie even
more "comedic". As a result of their
efforts, most of the movie has this
strange feeling of superficiality.
Despite these problems, I still
think there are things which make
it enjoyable entertainment. If
you're franticly looking for something to do on a slow, boring Friday night, this would be a movie
' to see. I wouldn't tell everyone to
be sure to see it on the big screen,
but it's a definite renter.
The Prophecy
at Cineplex theatres
by Peter T. Chattaway
It's always fun to imagine what
BUCKS FOR BOORS
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TOGA PARTY
September 20
Draw: September 20, at 11pm
Prizes lor those in sheets
v_
2291 W. Broadway
733-2821
might happen if supernatural beings were to interact with we
mere mortals. Few of the modem
speculations can reach Homer's
epic heights, but there's something about rjiixing the transcendent and the everyday that is
quite appealing. Borderline sacrilegious, maybe, but then, that's
part of the fun.
Of all the filmmakers out there,
the ones most willing to skirt that
impious line are those who work
in honor. Not only do the angels
in their films - such as Gregory
Widen's The Prophecy —. wear
really cool sunglasses and use
four-letter words, these astral
hit-men dye their hair a deathly
bluish-black arid eviscerate
each other with psychotic panache.
As with most bibhcally-in-
spired gorefests, the book of
Revelation provides the impetus for the action in The
Prophecy, but the relevant
passage comes from a hitherto unknown 23rd chapter
found in an 1800-year-old manuscript left in the trenchcoat of an
angel killed in a car accident.
(Makes you wonder what happened to the "add notiiing, subtract nothing" clause in chapter
22, doesn't it?)
This passage predicts a second
war in heaven (the first saw the
expulsion of Lucifer and his cronies) that will circle, for some inexplicable reason, around a cannibalistic U.S. Army officer. It
seems that Gabriel (the ever-
spooky Christopher Walken) envies God's favoritism towards "the
talking monkeys" — i.e., humans
- but, ironically, for him to win
his war against the unseen angels who support the humans, he
needs a dose of mankind's wanton brutality to give him that win
ning edge. And apparently, in all
the millennia of man's inhumanity to man, Gabriel has had to wait
for this particular Arizona colonel's
burial to get his elixir of death.
On hand to thwart his scheme
is Simon (Eric Stoltz), an angel
who must be good because he's
got these flowing golden tresses,
and a doubting Thomas Daggett
[Exotica's Elias Koteas), an ex-
priest turned cop. They get some
unexpected help from a smooth
Lucifer (Viggo Mortensen), who's
rather upset, that Gabriel is encroaching on his territory.
The premise is both hokey and
brimming with intriguing possibilities - but then, writer/director Widen is the same scribe who
gave us the original Highlander.
He knows how to milk an audience's fascination with the absurd
possibility that grand, cosmic conflicts just might find their resolution in the commonplace settings
of back alleys and parking lots.
Unfortunately, somewhere
along the way he loses sight of
the very milieu that gave his angels flight. Instead of sticking to
his angelology, he mixes his pantheons and tosses in some Native
American "hand tremblers" to fix
things up.
More to the point, where the
hell is Michael; the grand poobah
of celestial cherubs? One can appreciate that Widen didn't want
to invoke God or Christ directly
(though they appear in icons and
the prayers of some characters),
but if he's going to splash angelic
rivalry on the screen, why isn't the
chief archangel himself getting on
Gabriel's ass?
The Prophecy isn't the ideal
statement in bringing apocalyptic horror down to earth - it sure
ain't Charles Williams - but it'll
do for now.
microserfs
a book by Douglas Coupland [HarperCollins]
Why is Douglas Coupland, popular chronicler of today's
underemployed youths, examining the lives of Microsoft
computer programmers? Is he cashing in on a lucrative
trend or just trying to understand a modern social phenomenon?
microserfs {that's peasants, not dudes) makes for light
reading, written as it is like a narrative diary. Coupland
has successfully adopted the language of 31.2 year old
geeks (not nerds) who share the media history of Star
Wars, Narnia, and Talking Heads.
The emptiness of the characters' relationships makes
it difficult for the reader to care much about them, detached as they are from community, family, and religion.
The crew of coders are only slightly cynical about buying
their food from Costco and their clothes from the Gap.
When offered a chance to create a series of Lego based
computer programs in the Silicon valley, they make an
easy transition from The Simpsons in Seattle to Melrose
Place in California.
Though novel, the use of text in a graphic manner is
amateurish and unimaginative. Media flotsam is juxtaposed without comment: "Welcome to Macintosh/Carl's
JryGore-Tex/gray metallic Saabs/Barry DiHer/KISS". Witty
cynicism, usually Coupland's strength, is few and far between.
Avoiding dramatic cyberspace, Coupland addresses
the realistic aspects of opening yourself up through e-
mail to distant friends or total strangers.
Like CNN Headline News, ideas have catchy names
and are superficially gleaned. Chyx is a group of women
programmers; TrekPolitiks is the Utopian political structure described in Star Trek episodes.
microserfs may be a shift in subject matter for
Coupland, but he has yet to write anything more interesting than his much-reprinted Generation K - Charlie Cho ultur
Compilation CD benefits rape crisis centres
Various Artists - Lit from Within
[Nettwerk]
by Jenn Kuo
Nettwerk Records held a CD release party at the Arts
Club Lounge last Thursday for their new benefit compilation. Lit from Within.
The brainchild of former Nettwerk marketing director
Toni Maruyama, Lit from Within is a compilation of works
by female Canadian musicians and poets. Net profits from
the CD will go to rape crisis centres across Canada to help
them continue the services they provide for the women
who need them.
Part way through the project, Maruyama left for Toronto
to work for Sony Music. At last Thursday's party, Jennifer
De Tracy, who carried on the project after Maruyama's
departure, read a letter from her. In the letter, she told the
story of how she was inspired to start this benefit CD.
Driving one night in North Van, Maruyama came across a
woman holding her clothes in her arms who then asked
her for a ride because she had just been raped. Maruyama
gave her a ride, and when she came aross the police on
her way, she left the woman with them. She never did
find out about the woman or what happened to her after
that night.
'Bruises', by Vancouver writer Evelyn Lau, is a typical
Lauian work: up front, first person, full of descriptive metaphors. One can feel the pain and sadness of the person
being oppressed in the poem. With lines like
his hands pressed hard flat marks down my neck
they left the rawness of rope burns
bruises like blackberries...
we swam in a sea of bloody sheets
we are forced to face the reality of what rape feels like to
its victim.
Lynn Crosbie's 'For Jayne Mansfield' is another spoken
word piece on the album. It is a wonderfully delicious poem
chock full of blunt sensuous metaphors. Accompanied by
a sole guitar, the song has an overall haunting and solemn effect.
With 'Let Her Feel the Rain', newcomer Tara MacLean
makes her debut on this album. Singing simply with a
guitar, piano, and occasional backup vocals, she exudes a
down-to-earth, soulful sound. Undoubtedly, this is only a
taste of the talent to come on her upcoming full length
album (she is due to be in studios in October).
With 'Clinic', Crash Vegas even makes an appearance
on this album to make this a truly Canadian effort.
No pleasure from your tiny thumb ...
Free
I will fly
Free
I can fly.
Kristy Thirsk of The Rose Chronicles sings an enchanting song called 'Songbirds'. With a solo piano version of
'Good Enough', Sarah McLachlan also contributes to this
Nettwerk family album. With her comforting, familiar voice,
this cover is undoubtedly better than the album version.
From the lesser-known Taste of Joy to the well-known
Sarah McLachlan, this CD has a wide range of talent. Lit
from Within is one of those few compilations where the
songs and the spoken word work together well. It has
impassioned, provoking lyrics that show the strength of
women to overcome abuse and oppression. I can give the
Nettwerk family nothing but praise for the effort they put
into this album.
Some facts about rape and assault...
• a woman is raped every 17 minutes to Canada
• 1 woman in 4 wiN be raped sometime in her Hfe,
most often by someone she knows
• 1 to 8 girts is sexually assaulted before age 18,
most often by a mate family momber
• 54% of female spouses report having been physically assaulted at sonte time durtog their marriage
• women are 9 times more tterfy then men to quit
jobs because of sexual harassment, 5 times more
Hkely to transfer, end 3 times more likely to lose
Hieirjobs
JENN KUO PHOTO
The Rose Chronicles' "songbird", Kristy Thirsk,
contributes her enchanting voice to Lit from Within.
ftofessor Ring's >
3od we'll \hr°^
in the wheel/
?$ychidtri£ Savins'* ^a//
Mouri+ai'n Bikes.
^$PC/e oN' YEAR- RQL«NI>    D\ScouNT
up to layoff
prop by .,Ki ~
and visit the aood professor
VFM 6o63
Wesf lOrfx wevt-      .
fefAlfYAB) Boulevard
L 224-3536      2637587
USED TEXT BOOK CENTRE
OUR NEW SERVICE FOR STUDENTS
Now all your used books needs are in one place -
at the UBC Bookstore.
Sell your books for cash.
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Shop for used texts on sale throughout the UBC Bookstore -
including the new AMS Consignment Area
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AMS consigned texts available for purchase in the UBC Bookstore.
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Strong second half wins T-Bird season opener
by Wolf Depner
The UBC T-Bird football team
matched last year's win total in
their season opener Friday night.
In Casey Smith's debut as head
coach, the Birds beat the University of Alberta Golden Bears by
a convincing 35-18
margin in
front of
874 enthu-
s i a s t i c
fans.
The win
sparked
hope that
this year's
team will
improve
on its 1994
season,
when it
finished
with a dismal 1-6-1 record in
Canada West Conference play.
"[The guys] were serious about
playing football tonight and they
really took it to Alberta. It was a
UBC
Alta.
Rushing:
Caixies
28
26
Yards
145
144
Passing:
Attempts
21
34
Compl.
15
12
Yards
292
258
Defence:
Sacks
-;■■-  2
0
Interceptions
1
0
Fumbles Rec.
0
0
physical game and our guys were
hitting," said Smith, who was
given a Gatorade victory shower
by his players at the end of the
game.
However T-Bird fans had little
to smile about in the first half as
UBC only
managed
109 net
yards on offence. The
Alberta de-
fence
stuffed the
UBC running game
and har-
a s s e d
quarterback
Adrian
Rainbow.
Strong defence, special teams, and a timely interception deep in Alberta territory kept
the Birds in the game during the
first half.
The offence came out more
QUARTERBACK Adrian Rainbow calls the plays as T-Bird O-line faces the Bears' D-line.
» «,je*%
SIOBHAN ROANTREE PHOTO
_li_BHAN Ft ANTPrr FMOT_
TRANSFER student Simon Beckow evades one Golden Bear and is
pursued by Sean Newton (45).
focused in the second half. The
Birds scored 28 points on touchdowns by Rainbow, Brad
Yamaoka and Andrew English,
who also kicked two field goals.
Rainbow completed 15 of 21
passes for an impressive 292
yards and three touchdowns,
earning        him
player ofthe game
honours. But he
was quick to share
the laurels with his
teammates.   "It
was a total team
effort. You can't
pick out one guy,"
he said.
The Bears took a 7-0 lead on a
15 yard rush by second year running back Simon Baffoe in the
first quarter. Later, Alberta
quarterback Sean Zaychkowsky
was sacked by Hartley Strachan
forcing the Bears to attempt a 27
yard field goal. Rookie kicker
Troy Peters missed the mark and
the Bears had to settle for a single point.
Late in the second quarter
Zaychkowsky was picked off by
linebacker Stuart Doyle whose 19
yard return gave UBC possesion
on Alberta's 10 yard line. Rainbow hit Grayson Shillingford
with a 10 yard TD pass on the
very next play. The score was 8-7
in favour of the Bears at the end
of the first half.
1     2
3     4
Tot
UBC    0    7
15   13
35
Alta,    7    1
9      1
18
On UBC's first possesion of
the second half, Rainbow blitzed
the Alberta defence with a 3 play,
69 yard touch down drive. It included a 50 yard reception by
speedster Shillingford, who finished the evening with 7 receptions for 174 yards and one TD.
Rainbow finished the drive
himself by scoring his first TD in
two years on a 19 yard right-end
sweep. A two point convert gave
UBC a 15-8 lead and the Birds
never looked back.
A 29 yard Alberta field goal
made the score 15-11, but UBC
quickly responded as Rainbow
completed a 5 yard toss to
Andrew English for another 6
points. Simon Baffoe scored his
second TD on a 4 yard rush to
bring the Bears within 4 at the end
of the third quarter.
However, consecutive 42 and 11 yard
field goals by
Andrew English
put the game out of
reach.
A late Alberta
rally was stymied
by a UBC defence that gained
confidence as the game went on.
It was led by third year linebacker
Stuart Doyle, a transfer student
from Shasta College in California. He had 10 tackles to go along
with his key interception.
The Bears simply ran out of
time in the fourth quarter as
UBC's offence controlled the ball
and the clock. A 6 yard TD reception by veteran running back
Brad Yamaoka late in the game
rounded out the scoring.
Free times for student use of SRC and Pool
Students can use the indoor
pool, whirlpool, weight room and
sauna for free during university
swims. When the new SRC building opens September 18, drop-in
times will also be available.
Here's a schedule of the free
times. Don't forget to bring your
valid UBC Library card!
University Swims
Weekdays     7:30 am - 9:00 am
Weekdays     11:30 am - 2:25 pm
Weekdays     4:30 pm - 5:30 pm
Drop-In Badminton
Monday 8:00 pm - 9:30 pm
Tuesday 9:45 pm - 11:30 pm
Thursday    9:30 pm - 11:30 pm
Drop-In Basketball
Tuesday       6:45 pm - 8:15 pm
Wednesday 9:45 pm - 11:30 pm
Thursday     8:00 pm - 9:30 pm
Drop-In Table Tennis
Monday 8:00 pm - 9:30 pm
Tuesday 9:45 pm - 11:30 pm
Thursday    9:30 pm - 11:30 pm
Drop-In Volleyball
Monday      9:30 pm - 11:30 pm
Tuesday       8:15 pm - 9:45 pm
Thursday     6:30 pm - 8:00 pm
Drop-In Wheelchair Bball
Wednesday 8:15 pm - 9:45 pm
Japanese on your PC!
Windows 3.x applications and
the Internet
Student rates.
Contact
Japan Cultural Exchange:
739-1826
or
Cenki@jce.com
FUTONS
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A WORLD OF STUDENT TJ24VEL
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"" a.nd,a|9^ri^the'\|aiir       S     ' '■
^M¥f»^m holidays Iri l1%fijtrles"with the   >'■
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Langua
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HosfefMili
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Inte
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Canada tickets and passes
lershlps, travel guide book
latlonal Student Cards ^ii
See us rittfit nere on campuc
Lower Level, Student Union Building 822-6890
H1RAVELCUT5
JThe Travel Company ofthe Canadian Federation of Students
Vegetarian Buffet
Wed. and Sunday
$10.00
v
KtJAJCA RmUlwuhI
Up to $5.00 Value !
Nyala cordially invites you
and your guest to enjoy one
complimentary ENTREE
when a second ENTREE of
equal or greater value is
purchased.
THIS COUPON DOESN'T APPLY
FOR THE VEGETARIAN BUFFET
VALID THRU OCT 31st, 1995
2930 West 4th Ave. Tel: 731-7899
Open Daily 5:00 PM Ubyssey T-Bird September SportsCal
Mon
Tues
Wed
Thurs
Fri
Sat
Sun
1
Football vs Alta. 7 pm
2
3
4
*
5
6
The Ubyssey pubttshes
7
8
9
Shram Bowl
Football vs SFU 7 pm
10
11
12
The Ubyssey publishes
13
14
15
The Ubyssey publishes
Field Hockey High
School Festival
Football @ Calgary
16
Field Hockey Festival
Men's Soccer vs Sask 2 pm
Worn. Soccer vs Sask 12:00
Vball vs Alumni 730 pm
(both men and women)
17
Men's Soccer vs Alta 2 pm
Worn. Soccer vs Alta 12:00
18
19
The Ubyssey pubttshes
Wom Vballvs West
Wash. 7 JO pm
20
21
22
The Ubyssey pubttshes
Hockey @ Edmonton
(Golden Bear Invitational)
Men's Vball vs UVic
(in Prince George)
23
Field Hockey @ Calgary
Football vs Manitoba 7 pm
Hockey @ Edmonton (GBI)
Rugby vs Old Boys 230 pm
Mens Soccer vs UVic 2 pm
Worn. Soccer vs UVic 12:00
24
Field Hockey @ Calgary
Hockey ©Edmonton (GBI)
Men's Vball vs UVic
(at 100 Mile House)
25
Men's Soccer vs SFU 7 pm
(at Swangard Stadium)
26
The Ubyssey pubttshes
27
28
29
The Ubyssey publishes
Hockey @ Sask
(Husky Fall Classic)
Women s Volleyball
(Simon Fraser Invitational)
30
Early Bird Tourney
(Field Hockey)
Football @ Sask
Hockey @ Sask (HFC)
M/W Soccer @ Calgary
Women's Vball (SFf)
All home games have times shown. Games are played in the following locations:
Field Hockey: Warren/MacGregor Fields Men's Soccer: Wolfson II Field
Football: Thunderbird Stadium Women's Soccer:      Wolfson II Field
Hockey: UBC Winter Sports Centre Men's Volleyball:      War Memorial Gym
Rugby: Wolfson East Field Women's Volleyball: War Memorial Gym
The summer in sports at UBC: A review
by Scott Hayward
The Summer Ubyssey published
seven issues in July and August.
Here's a brief review of some of
the sports stories covered.
Coaching Changes
UBC Athletics appointed Deb
Huband as Women's Basketball
Coach replacing Misty Thomas.
Huband was a three-time CIAU
All Canadian All-Star, a bronze
medalist at the 1979 and 1986
World Championships, and was
recendy inducted into the Canadian Basketball Sports Hall of
Fame.
Casey Smith replaced his father Frank as the T-Bird Football
coach this year. The former T-
Bird player was assistant head
coach from 1987-92 and has been
a guest coach at Toronto
Argonaut and Ottawa Rough
Rider training camps.
The T-Bird football team's defence will also have guidance
from former CFL players
Laurent (Lou) Des Lauriers and
James "Quick" Parker. Des
Lauriers played with Edmonton
and Toronto, while Parker played
in Edmonton and coached with
the BC Lions and Saskatchewan
Roughriders.
Men's Soccer
UBC sent coach Dick Mosher
and 12 current and former players tojapan to represent Canada
at the World University Games.
Several of the these players will
be back with the team this fall.
They will be joined by midfielder
Paul Dailly and centreback Nico
Berg who are playing the Vancouver 86'ers this summer.
Swimming
Four UBC students won gold
in the 4x 100-metre freestyle relay at the Canadian Summer
National Championships in Winnipeg at the end of July. Two of
those athletes went on to represent Canada at the Pan Pacific
Championship in Atlanta in
August.
Sarah Evanetz, Anita Lee,
Alexandra Ruiz, and Glencora
Maughan combined for gold in
the relay event competing for the
Pacific Dolphin Svvdmming Association, a Vancouver club team
which shares its coaching staff
with the UBC Varsity team.
Evanetz swam individually for
Canada in Atlanta where she
place 7th in the 100-metre butterfly and 13th in the 200-metre
butterfly events. She posted a
personal best 2:15.44 in Winnipeg in the 200-metre race and is
hoping to make the Olympic
team next year.
Lee finished a disappointing
21st in the 50-metre freestyle in
AUanta, but finished 10th with a
lifetime best time of 56.93 sec-
BACK TO SCHOOL SALE
Wide selection of day packs, clothing and jackets
(also prototypes & end-of-line specials)
JACK WOLFSKIN
TRAVEL PACK detachable day
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Also an extensive selection of backpacking equipment
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onds in the 100-metre freestyle
event. She also swam in the
4x 100-metre freestyle relay on a
Canadian team which finished
4th with a time of 3:46.82.
T-Bird teams on Tour
The women's field hockey
team and the men's volleyball
team will both have a head start
on the competition this year.
Coach Hash Kanjee and the
women's field hockey team left
in early August for an 11 game
tour of Australia. Players raised
some of the money for the trip
themselves, and put up about
$700 of their own money to help
cover costs.
Coach Dale Ohman and 15
men's volleyball players went on
a 13 day tour of Korea. The trip
is part of a formal exchange
agreement between UBC and
Sung-Kyun Kwan University
which has resulted in four such
trips to date.
Going to Korea does not necessarily guarantee players a spot
on the roster. Tryouts for the varsity team will take place during
the second week of classes.
Rec Centre opening delayed
As recendy as early August,
the Student Recreation Center
was expected to be ready in the
first week of September. However delays have pushed the
opening back to September 18.
The new facility is located on
Maclnnes field by the north-east
corner of SUB. It contains three
full-size gymnasiums, a weight
room/fitness centre, a martial
arts studio, dance studio,
playcare facilities, and offices for
administration. Annual Shrum Bowl football game returns to UBC
by Darren Campbell
The crosstown grudge match
between the SFU Clansmen and
the UBC T-Birds returns this
weekend in Shrum Bowl XVIII.
After a one year hiatus the stage
has been set in the batde for football bragging rights in BC.
The game will take place at
Thunderbird Stadium Saturday,
September 9 at 7:00 pm. Expect
the rivalry to be fierce as the series is tied at 8-8-1.
SFU head coach since 1983
Chris Beaton compared the
Shrum Bowl to the Notre Dame-
Miami rivalry. He added that this
game has the same feel for him
as the Rose Bowl.
UBC coaches "feel confident in-
our guys' attitude and the way
hings are coming together," said
Head Coach Casey Smith at a
press conference Tuesday afternoon. "Simon Fraser has got a
good football team. I think it will
be a great game," he said.
Beaton played in the inaugural Shrum Bowl back in 1967. "It
was very exciting, a huge deal
was made of it, and it was on the
front page ofthe newspaper with
lots of coverage," he said.
He also spoke of the anticipation that players feel heading into
the game. "Well, I was so nerv-
SIOBHAN ROANTREE PHOTO
ANDREW ENGLISH kicked a field goal on the last play of the game to
win the last Shrum Bowl in 1993. "I kept my head down and kicked it. I
didn't realize it had gone through until my teammates jumped on me."
The Ubyssey Newspaper is looking
for writers and production people.
It you know how to write or do
desktop publishing (or would like
to learn how) come on out. We
need people for
■**•.•
•Sports r:
• Culture
•Features
• Typesetting
• Photography
The Ubyssey has staff meetings
every Wednesday
12:30 pm in SUB 241K
ous all through the weekend, the
game was on a Monday and I
couldn't sleep on Sunday it Was
so big," he said.
Scheduling conflicts forced the
cancellation of last year's game.
But UBC Athletic Director Bob
Philip and his SFU counterpart
Mike Dinning (SFU) have put
together a multi-year commitment to stage the contest annually. This was very difficult task
considering the teams are in different leagues.
UBC plays in the Canada
West Conference of the Canadian Interuniversity Athletic
Union (CIAU) league using CFL
rules (3 downs). SFU plays in the
National Association of Intercollegiate Athletics (NAIA) league,
Division II using American rules
(4 downs).
This year the Shrum Bowl will
be played using American rules.
"We have to change our system
around in a short period of time,"
said Smith. Nevertheless he is
confident. "We'll overcome it
and be ready Saturday night."
Clansmen players were reluctant to speak on the record, but
their talk seemed to suggest that
they will be very motivated.
"Bash the Birds" was one rallying cry heard, and they have
been counting the days down to
this game, which will be their first
of the year.
SFU won the first Shrum Bowl
game in 1967, and last won in
1991. The last contest was held
in 1993, and saw placekicker
Andrew English kick a field goal
on the last play of the game to
hand the Clan a 20-17 loss.
Then Assistant Head Coach
Casey Smith told the nervous
English to "focus for 5 seconds
and do your job," English recalled. "I kept my head down
and kicked it. I didn't realize that
it had gone through until my
teammates all jumped on me."
Keys to SFU success this year
are the kicking game of Junior
Brett Anderson, who like English, is also a wide receiver.
Linebacker Justin Ring also has
to play well.
The game has played in front
of crowds of up to 14,000 and the
organizers hope for a huge turnout this year. This gridiron
grudge match should make for an
exciting game.
Become a T-Bird athlete
Ever wanted to be a varsity
athlete? September tryout times
provided by the Department of
Athletics are listed below.
Men's Basketball
Bruce Enns has tryouts scheduled for September 5 from 6:00
to 8:30 pm and September 6 beginning at 4:15 pm in War Memorial Gym.
Hockey
Mike Coflin will hold a meeting at Thunderbird Winter
Sports Centre on September 5 at
5:30 pm. On-ice tryouts will take
place September 6 and 7, also at
5:30 pm.
Men's Volleyball
Dale Ohman will be holding
tryouts for both the varsity and
junior teams together. They will
take place in the Student Recreation Centre on September 11 at
6:30 pm, and September 12 and
13 at 4:45 pm.
Women's Basketball
Deb Huband will begin tryouts in War Memorial Gym on
September 5 from 4:30 to 6:30
pm.
Women's Volleyball
Doug Reimer will start tryouts
on September 11. Sign up on his
office door in WMG 280.
Swimming
Tom Johnson and Randy
Bennett will begin tryouts with a
meeting on September 7 at 5:30
pm in the Aquatic Centre Classroom. For more information, call
822-9623 or 822-4522.
Women's Ice Hockey
There will a meeting on September 8 at 4:00 pm at the
Thunderbird Winter Sports Centre and on-ice tryouts will start
at 5:15 pm.
Rowing
There will be meetings on September 12 and 13 at 5:30 pm in
Osborne Gym A.
U     B
THUNDERBIRDS
10
20
30
40
50
SHRUM BOWL XVIII"
20
50
40
$10 Grandstand - $6 Grass Seating in ADVANCE
30 T^iikets^vaHabl©^at4he«AMS*©©^©lfi€efSy^—— 30
or at War Memorial Gym Dispensary 8:30 am-9:30 pm
24 hour Ticket and Game Information
10 •    • ■ y*KL-n_  #t#frr-i>OTrw* •    -■     -"10
20
Call: 222=BTRD
Wednesday, September 6, 1995
The Ubyssey AMS Update
Welcome back!
There's been a lot of changes since school let out! There's been changes to UBC's tuition policy, renovations to the SUB
Concourse, drastic modifications to federal and provincial funding of post-secondary education (PSE), and many accountability changes within the Alma Mater Society. We look forward to seeing you at the AMS Welcome Back BBQ this Friday
at Maclnnes Field. Feel free to drop by our offices in the northwest corner of the top floor in SUB to catch up on what we've
been up to for the last four months. Our door is always open!
Janice Boyle (Pres), Namiko Kunimoto (VP) David Borins (External) Am Johal (Admin) Tara Ivanochko (Finance)
CONGRATULATIONS TO THE UBYSSEY ON ITS WELL DESERVED AUTONOMY. CHEERS!
A call for volunteers
Looking to gain new skills? The AMS Services are looking for
volunteers to assist them in everything from general office
duties to counseling and conflict resolution. Drop by and
lend us a hand — you'll gain great work experience and meet
new people! No experience necessary and time commitments
vary.
JOBLINK STUDENT EMPLOYMENT CENTER is looking for
people available from 11:30 am to 1:30 pm during the week and
who would like to gain experience performing a wide variety of
office and computing duties, marketing and media relations.
Applications available from JobLink in SUB 100A.
SAFEWALK needs everyone interested in campus safety to
become a volunteer! For just 2 hours a week, Safewalk volunteers will escort other UBC students and staff to go to any campus destination after dark. Applications available from the
Safewalk desk beside the Gallery Lounge.
SPEAKEASY PEER COUNSELING AND INFORMATION is looking for 50-75 students who are friendly and want experience in
counseling and information services. Applications available at
Speakeasy and must be returned by Sept 13th.
AMS VOLUNTEER SERVICES has positions available that will
allow you to gain valuable experience or just explore your
career options. Positions available include Assistant Director,
Secretary/Treasurer, Special Events Coordinator as well as people to help with seminars, placements and administration.
Applications available at Volunteer Services, SUB 100D.
THE OMBUDSOFFICE is looking for 10 new caseworkers to
help seek resolutions to student complaints regarding both academic and other university-related matters for 3-5 hours per
week. Training in conflict resolution and mediation provided.
Applications available at the Ombudsoffice, SUB 1008 and
must be returned by Sept. 15th.
JobLink
AMS      \
VOLUNTEER
SERVICES^
SafeWalk
program
PEER COUNSELLING
AND INFORMATION
In addition to alt the vacancies within AMS Services, there
are also many positions within the student government
available. Learn great leadership and communication skills
while making a contribution that all students can benefit
from.
ELECTIONS ADMINISTRATOR oversees the General
Elections held each January. Supervisory and organizational
experience and ability to work well under pressure an asset,
involves a commitment of 3 hours a week except for an average of 30 hours per week during January. Term expires March
15, 1996. The successful candidate may not hold any elected or appointed positions within the AMS or constituencies.
ELECTIONS COMMITTEE MEMBERS assist the Elections
Administrator in their duties in running the AMS Elections are
assigned specific responsibilities by the Committee. Positions
include Chief Returning Officer, Deputy Returning Officer,
and 2 at-large Members and involve a heavy time commitment during January. Terms expire March 15, 1996.
STUDENT ADMINISTRATIVE COMMISSION MEMBERS are
responsible for establishing and enforcing the security, building and bookings policy for the SUB, acting as the AMS's liaison with constituencies, administering the AMS Art Gallery,
regulating and constituting the 180 AMS clubs, providing
function security for SUB events and organizing related
events such as Clubs Days. Involves a commitment of 10
hours a week, including weekly (Monday evening) SAC meetings. Members appointed for terms expiring March 15th or
September 30. Commissioner's portfolios include Vice-Chair,
Building, Clubs , Art Gallery, Constituency, and At-large with
portfolios decided by the Commission. Please submit resumes
for all above positions to Craig Bavis, c /o Nominating
Committee at the address below
SENATOR-AT-LARGE, FORESTRY SENATOR, EDUCATION
SENATOR serve on the UBC Senate, the body within the
University that administrates all academic matters. Each faculty has its own senator, in addition to five senators-at-large.
The Senator-at-large position is open to all students, while
candidates for the other two positions must be from the
respective faculties. Duties include attending Senate and
Student Senate Caucus meetings. Applicants must be registered in a minimum of 24 credits to be eligible. Please
resumes for the above positions to Lica Chui, Chair, Student
Senate Caucus at the address below.
Rm 238, Student Union Building 6138 Student Union
Boulevard, UBC
All nominations close Mon, Sept 25th, 1995 at 4:30 pm.
ALMA MATER SOCIETY
STUDENT SOCIETY OF UBC
Prepared by your student society ultur
Insanity is a lot of fun
The Madman and the Nun
at the Alexander Centre until
September 17
by Diana Stein
According to Madman's mad artist
Walpurg, "In this world, art can only be a
grotesque imitation."
Well, maybe, but sometimes it can also
be a lot of fun, as the Square Planet Performance Group proves in their production of
Stanislaw Witkiewicz's bizarre one-act trip
through "a busy night at the asylum."
The plot centers around the dual protagonists of artist-tumed-inmate Walpurg (Hiro
Kanagawa) and Sister Olivia (Melanie
Doerr), a psychiatric nun sent to help him
as part of a series of hit-and-miss cures
thrown at the various patients. As it turns
out. Sister Olivia, along with every other
character, has problems of her own.
By the end of the play, one is left wondering not only about the sanity of the characters, but also about one's own state of
mind. Happily though, as one leaves the
theatre, one feels that the whole question
of sanity versus insanity does not much
matter as long as one is having a good time
- and everyone in this production seems to
be having plenty of that.
From start to finish, the production is an
unconventional, energetic mix of words
\ X
Melanie Doerr and Hiro Kanagawa star m The Madman and the Nun.
Sheridan a likable autobiographer
and movement, humour and pathos. Director Marc Diamond's adaptation ofthe original text (Witkiewicz committed suicide in
1939 rather than be captured by the Nazis) uses updated references that allow the
piece to be timely and relevant with regards to social and political issues, as well
as the mental illness and social malaise
that still afflict us in the '90s. The text is
witty, irreverent, and often moving, and
the choreography by Lee Su-Feh (who, in
a truly strange piece of casting, plays the
authoritarian Dr. Waldorf) provides some
of the show's
most memorable moments,
such as the romantic dance
number with a
hospital gur-
ney.
The cast is
without a weak
link, and Kanagawa is especially mesmerizing to watch.
He is one of
those rare performers who
simply seems
incapable of
being uninteresting on
stage. Overall,
the actors' comic sensibilities almost ne
ver fail, and they all seem to improve as
the play becomes more and more absurd.
The cast and director have clearly recognized that the only way to deal with the
play's absurdity successfully is to refuse to
recognize it as such.
In short, this is a well-crafted production of a play that careens wildly without
losing its audience. After seeing this show,
you may wonder if a little insanity is such
a bad thing after all.
As the good doctor says, "learn to love
your cage."
The Waltonsteins
closed September 2 at the
Gastown Studio Theatre
by Diana Stein
OK, a Catholic and a Jew walk
onto a stage and ... Hey, wait a
minute — they're the same person!
The unusual and autobiographical premise of Frannie
Sheridan's one-woman show revolves around her as a child of
Holocaust survivors who tried to
conceal their family's Jewish origins by masquerading as Catholics, even after their emigration to
Canada.
Sheridan is an adept physical
performer who skilfully delineates
her characters with distinctive
gestures and facial expressions
throughout the 50-minute show.
Sheridan has an appealing
stage presence, and, perhaps because she appeared a little nervous at times, she never comes off
as being too slick. Indeed, one of
the show's best aspects is the
emotional honesty that comes
through Sheridan's work: there
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are touches of humour throughout, but she is never tastelessly
glib or flippant. Even her often
unflattering portrayal of her father
contains a consistent undercurrent
of sympathy for the unbelievable
hardships he had to endure.
When Sheridan really does
make fun of something, it is usually at her own expense, as when
she bluffs her way through Hebrew while exploring her Jewish
heritage. In moments like that,
Sheridan's stage persona is simply so likable that the audience
not only laughes with her, but is
also persuaded to sing and clap
along with her to her father's favorite old Yiddish song.
Sheridan does leave the audi
ence wanting more, and that, perhaps, is the show's major flaw, as
some characters (like Sheridan's
mother) are introduced but never
really explored, and one is left to
wonder about them. The problem
could be solved by making the
show longer, which may be impractical for a single performer, or
by narrowing its focus so that peripheral issues do not take up time
that could be put to better use
elsewhere.
Overall, however, Sheridan is
just so damn likable as a performer
that one is willing to forgive a lot,
and if it comes around again, it
will be a show worth seeing, even
if you're not Jewish, Catholic, or
just plain guilt-ridden.
IVCF
Oh Cw*pkf
Medical Science Complex
GcptcMa
14
21
28
ON LINE WITH IVCF
Special Invitation to New Students!
MASTER THE UBC EXPERIENCE
Panel of Campus Experts
THE CRITICAL INTEGRATION
FACTOR
Dr. Dennis Danielson
Dept. of English, UBC
CYBERSPACE, THE CONSUMER
SOCIETY, and the LOSS OF SELF
Dr. David Lyon
Dept. of Sociology, Queen's University
SMALL GROUPS:   Karen 222-1968 <fej lulien 224-5565
FALL RETREAT or Other Info: 822-9253
Sponsored by UBC Inter-Varsity Christian Fellowship.
Diane Thinks Charlie Paid
$6,000 For His New Wheels
In reality, Charlie bought his 1990 Nissan
Pulsar, with air-conditioning, built-in C-D
player, T-bar roof, six-cylinder engine, and
power everything for just $2,900.
He Bougkt ZJ-r Wholesale	
yVf J_-aw^eKvce jAuto j\iA<zY\on
This one-owner beauty had just 87,000 km on it. Charlie even
brought a mechanically-inclined friend along a day before
the auction.
Twice weekly, Lawrence Auto Auction sells hundreds of vehicles to hundreds of buyers. And since you're buying from the
same source many dealerships buy from, you're going to get
your next vehicle wholesale.
* Choose from more than 600 vehicles weekly
* Cars, vans and light trucks
* Most makes and model years
* Prices from $300 to $30,000
* All vehicles sold wholesale!
Auctions held every Tuesday evening at 6:30
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* Most makes and model years
* Prices from $300 to $30,000
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(Just past the Pattullo Bridge) opinion
The real threat to academic freedom
The CBC called last week. They were preparing a feature on "the changing face" of Canadian university campuses, and they wanted to
know what UBC's official student paper had to
say on the subject.
They asked us how universities these days are
changing, so we told them.
We told them about $220 million in BC post-
secondary education cuts. We told them our
tuition was set to increase by thirty to 300 per
cent. We told them about the government's first
tentative steps toward a privatized student loan
program, where banks may eventually decide
But the CBC didn't seem interested. They
wanted to use the summer's McEwen report
controversy as a "hook" to rehash the media's
current flavour of the month, "academic freedom" vs. what people used to call "political
correctness."
The exchange was typical of the misguided
"debate" taking place in the mainstream press
over what's happening at UBC and at Canadian
universities in general. While post-secondary
education faces its greatest threat to accessibility
serious. Debate over issues like free-speech in
classes students cannot afford to attend quickly
becomes... well, academic.
Our conversation with the CBC is a perfect
example of why students need the student press.
"What are the students there really thinking,"
they kept asking us. "What are they concerned
about?"
The Ubyssey can hardly be expected to speak
for 30,000 free-thinking individuals, and we told
them as much. But while we cannot claim to
speak for students, we are in a better position
since the introduction of comprehensive
subsidization in 1967, newspapers like the Globe     than anyone else to listen to them.
The CBC called us back just as we were
who gets to go to university. We told them about and Mail spend editorial after editorial griev
unprecedented increases in student debt. We ously warning Canadians that their universities
told them about a campus in the process of are under attack from feminists and "mind
selling itself to soft-drink multinationals and hot police."
dog vendors, about a university that has to sell The fiscal threat to "academic freedom" may
ads in its own calendar to help cover the cost of not be as colourful, but it is certainly more
printing.
going to press. They had "done some interviews
over the weekend," they told us, and wouldn't
be coming after all.
We can't say we were terribly surprised. Or
disappointed.
the
ubyssey
Septembers, 1995
volume 77 issue 1
The Ubyssey Is a founding member of Canadian University Press.
Tbe Ubyssey is published Tuesdays and Fridays by The Ubyssey
Publications Society at the University of British Columbia. Editorial
opinions expressed ate mose of the newspaper and not necessarily those
of the university administralJon or the Aima Mater Society.
Editorial Office: Room 241 Kr Student Union Building,
6138 SUB Blvd., UBC V6T 121
tel: (604) 022-2301   fax:(604)822-9279
Business Office: Room 245, Student Union Building
advertising: (604) 822-1654   business office: (604) 822-6681
Business Manager Femle Pereira
Advertising Manager: James Rowan
Ad Rep: Deserie Harrison
Canada Post Publications Sales Agreement Number 0732141
It was way too early for Charlie Cha He stumbled out of his and ran to the bus stop, Ron
Ekfeter and Janet Winters were waiting there. They waited for about ten. minutes and then
the bus pulled In. The driver, one Femie fterra, handed them then- transfers. Chris Nuttall-
Stbith was seated at the bade ofthe bus. It was a short ride to campus. As the three got off
a*;the bo* loop, they noticed AHson Cole and Woh* Depner and said, "hr". They all needed
some caSeine so they walked over to Bhie Chip and lined up behind Sarah O'Donnell and
Diana Stein. Ben Koh passed them as he ran to his first class. He was in soch a hurry that
he knocked over Scott Hayward. Andy Barham and Andy Boufield witness the collision
and bowled. Steve Emery helped the hapless grad student np. Jenn Kuo walked past the
ctowjdshxmhkdng nerload ofneavy and expensive textbooks. When she arrived at class
she saw Pat McGaire and Darren Campbell To their coSecnve surprise Des Harrison was
lecturing today. After the class Des met np with James Rowan and had knch with him.
Meanwhile Peter T Chattaway wasstiS stack in the huge line up at Brock Hall. Scarlett
McGtadery was fawByifnitshed there and went over to Buchanan to rent a locker from
Andy Ferris. He was sitting with Phil Drosa and Siobhan Roantree, who were laughing at
the first Underground Matt Thompson walked over and n^ group adjourned to the GaQery.
letters   ■
Yogic Flying in
conversation pit?
This letter is in response to
the Alma Mater Society's Update on the SUB Renovations
in the Aug. 24 issue of The
Ubyssey. Although I can appreciate the AMS's attempts to
improve the atmosphere in the
conversation lounge, I think
that someone has taken the
words "artistic license" just a
bit too far. To quote the Update, the renovations will "enhance these areas with metaphorical meaning", and this
metaphoric meaning indicates
that "Students are on a vital yet
difficult developmental journey ... The traveler passes
through strange places with
fear and danger as a companion". In addition, a sculptor
has been hired to design something that will "identify ... the
astral and terrestrial environments", such as "... outer
space, landing zones on the
moon, hiking trails ..., and sailing courses". The lighting will
be designed as "a radiant energy which brings life, interacting with users to facilitate
progress ... Light is a manifes
tation ofthe creative, and symbolizes eternity."
Hogwash. I thought light
consisted of a wave or a particle. I don't know who came up
with these ideas, but all I want
from the conversation pit is a
place to meet friends and eat
pizza. I don't really care if the
SUB enhances my inner well-
being. I don't want to feel like
I'm spiritually buoyed to the
moon, nor do I see how redesigning the conversation pit
can guide students to their future. It's a place to sit down,
for God's sake. What does the
Renovations Committee think
they're doing? Whose opinion
did they ask before they decided to take UBC students on
a spiritual journey? The Natural Law Party? Perhaps they
will have free Yogic Flying
Lessons throughout the year.
On a good note, it's nice to see
that an Arts graduate finally
got a job somewhere.
Josh Bender
Commerce 4
Editors:
Coordinating Editor: Siobhan Roantree
Copy Editor: Sarah O'Donnell
News Editor: Matt Thompson
Culture Editor: Peter T. Chattaway
Sports Editor Scott Hayward
Acting Production Coordinator: Andy Ferris
LETTERS POLICY: Letters to the editor must be under 300 words. "Perspectives" are opinion pieces over 300 words but under 750 words and are run according to space.
"Freestyles" are opinion pieces written by Ubyssey staff members. Priority will be given to letters and perspectives over freestyles unless the latter is time sensitive. Opinion
pieces will not be run unless the identity of the writer has been verified. Please include your phone number, student number and signature (not for publication) as well as your year
and faculty with all submissions. ID will be checked when submissions are dropped off at the office of The Ubyssey, otherwise verification will be done by phone.
Hey! you got the
wrong committee
Dear Editor,
Your story on the Faculty of
Arts meeting called to discuss
the reopening of graduate admissions in Political Science
(24 August) refers to an ad hoc
committee struck by the Dean
of Arts "to forward recommendations based on the
McEwen Report." In fact,
there are two committees: one
created by the President, the
other by the Dean of Arts. It
is the responsibility of the
President's committee to act
on the recommendations of
the McEwen Report; the Arts
committee of which I am
Chair has a somewhat different purpose.
Our goal is to establish a set
of guidelines under which future complaints covered by
the UBC Policy on Discrimination and Harassment may
be handled fully, fairly, and
consistently. Our mandate is to
establish procedures that will
address complaints through
resolution at the departmental
level. Other procedures available to complainants include
mediation and formal investigation; these are conducted by
the University's Equity Office,
and therefore are not part of
our mandate.
Though the "Guidelines
Committee" is an ad hoc committee in Arts, we would welcome comments or suggestions from students, staff, and
faculty in all areas. By establishing clear procedures and
clarifying some of the principles underlying the UBC
Policy, we hope to be able to
improve the climate for all
members of the University.
Sincerely,
H.J. Rosengarten
Department of English
Chair, Ad Hoc
Guidelines Committee
No need to
suffer alone
This letter is in response to
the article "Frequently
misdiagnosed disease..." published in your August issue. I
am writing this letter to convey my sympathy and understanding regarding what you
are going through. I am a 32
year old male student at UBC.
I too have been suffering the
dual agony of severe pain and
mis-diagnosis. Unfortunately
my illness has been with me
for 15 years. I know only too
well what it feels like to be told
"it's all in vour head" or even
22
The Ubyssey
Wednesday, September 6, 1995 worse those looks or tone that make
you feel that you're a hypochondriac.
So you can see that this attitude is not
at all related to gender. When a person has a condition that is either unusual or rare, the medical profession
is very quick to attribute it to psychological causes. Since my intense yet
inexplicable pain began I've seen
countless doctors with the same lack
of results that you've experienced. I
too sometimes pray that they would
find something already so that I can
prove to them and to myself that it
isn't "all in my head".
Secondly, I'd like to tell you that
you are not alone. The feeling of isolation and of being alone with a
chronic illness can lead to feelings of
hopelessness and depression. It is
important to realize that many people suffer chronic pain and illness.
The problem is that we don't come
into contact very often with people
who are in chronic conditions, especially in a University setting. Addi-
opinion
tionally, many chronically ill people
decline to talk about their conditions
because they don't want to be considered "whiners" or worse.
In closing, I would also like to suggest that you consider alternative
medicine. Acupuncture, Homeopathy and Reiki are three that I have
had some success with. In addition,
the attitudes of these practitioners are
radically different from that of traditional allopathic doctor. A
Homeopath, for example, treats you
as a whole and unique person to be
cured. They want to hear ever symptom in great detail in order to come
up with a remedy to "cure" not to
suppress symptoms. You aren't made
to feel like a hypochondriac, in fact
the more symptoms you describe the
better are your chances for a correct
remedy being found. I wish you luck
and success on your journey.
A.C.
[name withheld
at writer's request]
Citizens of the UEL
unite!
Public anger over the wanton destruction of University Boulevard's silver maple trees has driven the B.C.
Highways Ministry to sophistry: area
manager Lloyd Paulson has assured
the community that there is no plan
to widen the Boulevard, and he "wonders how the rumour started" (Vancouver Courier, August 23).
Aside from the Ministry's attempts
to destroy the trees - an omen in itself - there is also UBC's Greater
Campus Plan, which would extend
Thunderbird Boulevard to University
Boulevard" as a means of "distributing traffic over a greater number of
roads" (Plan, p. 40,60). Little wonder
local residents presumed the Ministry
was clearing the margins of University Boulevard prior to road widening!
UBC is now well into the mid-range
stage of development in a plan that envisions the University, "some 30 years
into the future, as a mature stage" (p.
iii). This long-range view feeds the
University's present building strategies, and at the same time fans community fears of a UBC takeover.
Events surrounding a recent UEL political referendum, as well as the current cutting of the beautiful maple
trees, shows people that they can trust
neither the government nor the University to honour the public trust.
The immediate communities of
UEL, Point Grey, Dunbar, and
Musqueam need to form an alliance
- need, perhaps, to set up border patrols along the great stretch of land that
constitutes UBC. The communities
need to record all movements of men
and machinery on the borders, and to
keep a log of their findings so that
when government ministry or corporate university strike again, citizens are
prepared with an integrated defence.
Nancy Horsman
UEL Resident
Hey!
We know
you have
opinions!
This
could be
your
very own
letter
right here]
It's a new way to look at libraries: the drunken library crawl
Tired of Pit line-ups? Sick of
the Gallery's food? Koerner's too
far away?
No problem! We here at The
Ubyssey are dedicated to protecting your right to free unhindered
drinking. That's why we've come
up with The Ubyssey Drunken
Library Crawl! All you need are
six beer, a map of the campus,
and a blatant disregard for the
laws of British Columbia.
Main Library:
The Big Kahuna! Library Central! Home to every book published before 1950 (and almost
none of those published after). Inaugurate your Drunken Library
Crawl with a cold one in the base
ment! Make sure to play tag on
the fifth floor and salute the gargoyles on your way out.
The Music Library:
Refined .... dignified ... catatonic. For entertainment purposes
ask the desk-jockey if they have
any Duran Duran. Give the bust
of Bach a nougie for good luck
and listen to Wagner's Ring cycle while sucking back Brewski
number two.
Woodward Biomedical Library:
This one has two big advantages over a bar: open all night
and you can check out body parts
for your research project. The
only place on campus you and
your friends can compare scalpels
without getting arrested. Don't
stay too long - people go missing
here. Just drink your damn beer
and leave.
The Law Library:
Think of this one as the antechamber to Hell. Thousands and
Freestyle
by Phil Drosa
thousands of legal texts which
should only be read under threat
of torture. Drink quickly but
HMV's campaign is offensive, not "irreverent
rr
HMV wants to sell you irreverence for the price of a CD.
Those yuppies in their power
suits were still feeling warm and
fuzzy after renting The Big Chill
and missed its point when they
came up with their latest ad campaign. They remembered the excitement of social movements in
their heady 60's, and knowing it's
in vogue for corporations to be
seen helping the needy, they recognized it could be lucrative for
themselves.
"It isn't Live Aid, it isn't Farm
Aid ... it's Makaroni Aid!" reads
the press release. HMV decided
to cash in on the work of former
Boomtown Rats lead singer Bob
Geldof who organized the Live
Aid concert to feed starving people in Ethiopia in 1985. They
called their campaign Makaroni
Aid in hopes that you'll associate
their sales pitch with the selfless
work of someone else. Now, if
you buy one of a select set of CDs
from HMV, they'll give you a
box of macaroni & cheese in their
"funky" HMV box.
The new gimmick from HMV
displays an ignorance and lack of
respect for students that we've
come to expect frpm the corporate establishment in the entertainment industry. Their press
release calls macaroni and cheese
students' "favorite comfort food".
Wrong! Students eat M&C because it's cheap and they're poor.
Poverty is not comforting. Besides, if students are so poor that
they can only buy M&C for dinner, then why the hell would they
be out buying CDs at HMV?
Of course HMV knows that
students are coming back to
school with the money from their
summer jobs and student loans,
money which is supposed to last
until April. Being young, sponta-
Freestyle
by Scott Hayward
neous, and often new to the idea
of budgeting, students will be
easy prey for HMV's slick lifestyle advertising. Hopefully students will look deep enough to
see through their thinly veiled
attempt to be their big corporate
buddy to see the real motivation
- HMV wants your student loan
money.
Calling the campaign
Makaroni Aid and comparing it
to the Live Aid concert is probably the most offensive part of it.
Live Aid was a pair of benefit
concerts, one at Wembley Stadium and the other in Philadelphia, to raise money for the Ethiopian famine. It was organized by
Bob Geldof, who was later
knighted by Queen Elizabeth for
his charitable work in Africa.
I watched the concert on TV
and it had a single message: send
us money so we can feed some
people who are dying. Everyone
who was anyone in.rock music at
the time volunteered to play: The
Stones, David Bowie, Phil Collins
played at Wembley and took a
Concorde Jet across the Atlantic
to play in the US, and even The
Who reunited for a day. When
Peter Gabriel walked out onto a
stage empty except for a lone
microphone the crowd went silent. He did a rendition of 'Biko'
that made the hair on the back of
my neck stand up and brought
60,000 people to their feet singing together as one.
News footage later showed delivery of grain to feed the starving.
It was given away. You never saw
Geldof telling the Ethiopians
"Here, buy my latest Boomtown
Rats CD for $14.95 and I'll give
you enough grain to feed yourself
for a day. Or buy my new boxed
set for only $39.95 and you'll get
enough grain to eat for a week."
If HMV really wanted to help,
maybe they could have paid some
students' tuition instead of coming
up with their self-described "totally
irreverent Makaroni Aid '95 program." So next time you buy CDs,
go somewhere else. Or better yet
go to HMV, get your macaroni,
dump it on the floor, and tell HMV
that you'll define irreverence for
yourself.
make sure to whack a lawyer with
the bottle on the way out. Shakespeare would thank you.
Sedgwick Library:
The closest thing to a New
York subway to be found at UBC.
Comment meaningfully on the
disposable architecture and the
staggering lack of books before
inhaling beer number five
through your nose. Propose to a
librarian: they need the atention.
Lam Library:
Don't forget the "E". The only
library on campus which feels like
it should have a dress code. More
security measures than the Pentagon. Feel free to strip naked as
you calmly sip your last beer
while yodelling in Gaelic.
Now that you've finished the
drunken library crawl don't you
feel refreshed, invigorated, intoxicated? Hasn't life suddenly taken
on new meaning as you are the
proud survivor of the Drunken
Library tour? But wait, it's not
over yet! The Ubyssey will give the
first person to bring video footage of this miraculous feat the
sum of one hundred dollars Canadian! Do you feel up to the
challenge? Are you capable of
being a Drunk Librarian?
P.S. You really don't have to
hit a law student with a beer bottle. They've already got enough
problems.
UBC needs a 7-Eleven
Big Gulps, Slurpees,
Twinkees, nachos and cheese,
Bazooka gum, Snapple, Sensation bars, Old Dutch chips...
Have I got your attention — or
at least your stomach's - yet?
The other day I was making my usual out of the way
trek to the 7-Eleven on Alma
and 10th when it suddenly
struck me. If they are going to
put a McDonald's in the Village, why can't they put in a 7-
Eleven?
I can't say how many times
I have been annoyed that I
haven't been
able to satiate ray Slurpee craving
without leaving the confines of this
campus. Surely everyone
knows that McDonald's and 7-
Eleven thrive in a symbiotic
relationship on this planet of
ours!
I can't count how many
people there are who make it
a daily ritual to gulp a Gulp or
slurp a slurpee. After alL who
can resist that towering reservoir of carbonated ambrosia
and that deliriously brain
freezing superfluity of a
Slurpee? Being forced to
spend every last cent of our
Freestyle
byJenn Kuo
student loans, isn't it a part of
any starving student's culture
to nuke a suspicious looking,
cardboard sub in the 7-Eleven
microwave? Which kid didn't
grow up squishing that oozing,
white, plastic effluent out of a
Hostess Twinkle?
Just think, whenever you
are feeling depressed because
you just screwed up one of
your exams, you could walk
right into the Village 7-Eleven
and be cheered up instandy!
Doesn't everyone instandy fall
out of a state of stupor when a
moulting
Kermit the
Frog greets
you as you
enter the
premises?
And hey,
when all the washrooms in
Buchanan are busy or slovenly, you can just dash in and
use the facilities of your
friendly campus-hood 7-
Eleven!
I can think of no better proposal for the use ofthe Endowment Lands. Hey, maybe you
can, but before they put a
shopping mall in cur campus
or they turn RecFac into a Mirage resort and casino, a 7-
Eleven should definitely have
its place on campus.
Wednesday, September 6, 1995
The Ubyssey
23 News
It's going to be a big year for news, and we want
you to be a part of it. Join the ranks of such
illustrious scribblers as Allan Fotheringham,
Michael Valpy, Pierre Berton, Pat Carney and
Katherine Monk and write for rag that's been
serving students since 1918. Help provide UBC
students with the news and information they won't
find anywhere else.
Production
Without the people in this department, you
wouldn't be holding the twenty-four page paper
in your hands. Production people are the ones
who bring it all together, fusing creative energy
with technical know-how. Experience with
software like Pagemaker is helpful, but not a
must.
Sports
The fact we have a sports department this year is
something to get excited about. If you've ever had the
urge to write about your favourite sport, here's your
chance. This year's sports department covers everything
from football, basketball and volleyball to gymnastics,
swimming and curling. Even if you just want to cover the
local wheelbarrow races, The Ubyssey sports department
would love to have you.
Arts and Culture
If you've been scouring the campus in search of free
stuff, this is the department you'll want to call home. You
could find yourself being handed tickets to the grooviest
gigs, reading an amazing new book, or even listening to a
fresh new CD—all this could be yours in exchange for a
review of the freebies you receive. This fall is particularly
ripe for budding culture writers, with several upcoming
Vancouver festivals ranging from theatre to film.
Photography
If photography's your focus, you'll want
to stop on by 241K. Whether you're an old
pro or are just learning, we've got everything you need to become an ace photographer. Photographers can expect to shoot
everything from football to ballet to press
conferences.
Graphics
As you can see from the eye-catching
artwork that accompanies these blurbs,
graphics are a key element of any
newspaper. Cartoonists and designers
are always welcome to submit their work
for publication.
—?
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