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UBC Publications

The Ubyssey Apr 28, 1936

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 The Ubyssey
Issued Twice Weekly by the Students* Publications Board
of The University of British Columbia
No. 40
Washington Dean
Will Address
Graduation Week Functions
The annual Convocation
Banquet, which is given in honour of theg raduating class, is
their first welcome into the
membership of Convocation
and the Alumni Association. It
will be held in the Crystal
couver on May the 7th.
Ballroom  of the Hotel Van-
The Banquet consists of a dinner,
starting at 7 o'clock, followed by a
meeting of Convocation at 8:30. At
thc meeting officers for the forthcoming year will be elected and arrangements for next year's banquet made.
The speaker will be Dean Thomson of the University of Washington, one of the men to be granted
an honorary degree at the Special
Congregation on May the 6th.
An orchestra under the direction of
Miss Daphne Carapata is to supply
the music during the dinner, while a
musical program will be contributed
by Miss Avis Phillips, soprano, accompanied by Miss Isbael Campbell.
Members of the graduating class
should make reservations for the banquet by May 1 at the latest. They
are asked to sign the sheet on the
Cafeteria notice board, and may obtain tickets on I/Ia> 3;   "*
On the afternoon of the same day,
Immediately after congregation, the
Alumni Association will entertain the
members of the graduating class with
their friends at tea in the Cafeteria.
MacMillan Will
Be the Speaker
At Congregation
At the regular Congregation, to be
held in the Gymnasium at 3 p.m. on
Thursday, May 7, Sir Ernest MacMillan will be the speaker. Announcement of awards of scholarships and
prizes and the award of the Governor
General's medal will be made.
Sir Ernest MacMillan is tiie head
of the Toronto Conservatory of Music,
director of the Toronto Symphony Orchestra and head of the Department
of Music at the University. He is one
of the distinguished men wha will receive LL.D. degrees from UB.C. on
May 6 at the Special Congregation.
Mary young and Dr. L. S, Klinck, who are preparing functions to entertain graduates and alumni during Graduation Week. President and Mrs.
Klinck will receive the graduates at a special tea in the Hotel Vancouver,
while Mary is on the committee handling the Graduation Ball in the Commodore,
Graduation Ball At Commodore
To Mark Twenty-First Anniversary
University To Grant LL.D.
To Six Men Next Week
Program For
Grads' Week
Is Full One
Baccalaureate To
Be Held In Christ
Church Cathedral
Christ Church Cathedral will
be the scene of the Baccalaureate Service on Sunday, May 3.
Dr. W. R. Armitage will give
the sermon, pnd Chancellor R.
E. McKechnie and President L
S. Klinck have been tsked to
read the lessons.
The graduating class will
gather in the church hall on
Burrard street at I o'clock,
wearing academic dress. The
procession into the church is to
start at 7:30, and the executive
of the Senior Classes express
the hope that all members will
be present. A block of three
hundred seats is to be reserved
for graduates, the rest of the
church, about 1000 sea's, being
available for the general public.
Free to members of the graduating
class who sign reservation list on Caf
notice board by May 1.
Reserved tickets may be obtained
from class treasurer on Class day,
May 5.
"Sherlock" Takes A Peek
At Our Newest Council
Carey, Evans and McPhee Will Probably
Provide Plenty of Whoopee
By "Sherlock"
So This is Council!
Here we have 'em, folks. Just nine more members elected
for a year - - some of them perhaps to be elected for another
later on - - and then back again into their previous limbo of
practical obscurity.
Let's take a side-glance at the boys and girls - - or men and
women, as we presume they like to be called. (Every previous
Council that we have had any press relations with has seemed
to possess more than its share of slightly grandiose self-opinion-
Take John R. Gould—"Jay" they
call him, although we don't tnink the
sobriquet has any but a remote connection with the old maxim {'bout the
bird and the worm—for instance. One
of Vancouver's imminent lawyers, J.
H. G., we think, has missed his calling. While argumentation and a
strong belief in strict adherence to
parliamentary and legal procedure,
are undoubtedly his forte, Canada's
National railroads should offer promising fields for future endeavor. During the next year, our new Council
president will doubtless demonstrate
his marvellous faculty for rapid transportation across the field of Alma
Mater Business.
Secretarial reports, on tha other
hand,   will   perhaps   deviate   slightly
from the regular official form of writing. We can imagine the consternation at A.M.S. meetings next year
when Kay Scott walks In dignified
fashion to the front of the iilatform
to read:
"Students at the University of B.C.
Inst spring decided to float a bond
issue totalling $10,000, proceeds of the
issue to be utilized for construction
of a Students' Union Building on the
Varsity  Campus."
Not that Miss Kay doesn't know
how Council reports should he written, but she's bound to have difficulty overcoming her journalistic tendencies, developed through collection
with The Ubyssey and The Totem
during past years. In addition she'll
(Please turn to Page 5)
Grads and Alumni
Combining the Alumni Ball
with that of the graduating
class in honor of the twenty-
first anniversary of the University will be the Graduation
Ball to be held at the Commodore Cabaret on May 4 from
9 tii 2. The previously planned
All-Varsity dance for graduation week was cancelled in
favor of this plan.
In charge of the arrangements for
the gradautes are Bruce A. Robinson,
and Dick McLean while Dorothy McRae, John Burnett and Milt. Owen
will represent the Alumni.
The decorations, which will be
streamers and balloons carrying out
the University blue and gold, are In
charge of Brodie Gillies. The program will follow a typical graduation
Lending their patronage for the
Ball are Chancellor and Mrs. R. E.
McKechnie, President and Mrs L. S.
Klinck, Colonel and Mrs. H. T. Logan, Dean and Mrs. Daniel Buchanan,
Dean and Mrs. F. M. Clement, Acting
Dean and Mrs. J. M. Turnbull, and
Dean M. L. Bollert.
Guest of honor of the graduating
class are Mr. and Mrs. H. M. King,
Miss Mable Gray, Margaret Bcumont,
Audrey Horwood, Bernard Brynelson
and Jay Gould.
Grads To Be Feted
By Freshettes At
Special Tea Dance
Everyone attending the Class Day
exercises on May 5 is invited to the
Freshette Tea Dance in the gym immediately after the exercises, according to the committee In charge of the
ciance. This dance is free <.o members of the graduating class and their
The committee, consisting of Olive
Cummins and Mim Cosens, has secured Detwiller and his orchestra to
provide the music essential to the
occasion, and expects the dance to be
a worthy finale to the exercises,
Friday, May 1st
7:15 p.m.—University Women's Club
banquet for women.    Spanish Grill,
Hotel Vancouver.  Tickets J1.2o, available at door.
Saturday, May 2nd
9:00 am. and 2 p.m.—Boats leave
Union dock for boat trip. Basket picnic, tennis, dance with orchestra. Return 6 and 9 p.m. Sports attire. Student—ticket with payment of class
Sunday7*May 3rd
7:00 p.m.—Baccalaureate Set vice at
Christ Church Cathedral. Academic
dress. Graduates meet in Church
Hall, Burrard street, at 7:00 p.m. froin
where procession proceeds to the
Monday, May 4
4 p.m.—President and Mrs. Klinck's
Reception, Oak Room Hotel Vancouver, all members of graduating class
invited.   Afternoon Informal dress.
>9 p.m.—Graduation Ball, Commo-
dbre Cabaret.   Formal.   Ticket with
yment of Class fees. Tickets available to alumnae at door for $3.00 a
esday, May 5
p.m.—Class  day  in   auditorium,
ding of class poem, will, prophecy
|d valedictory address. Presentation
valedictory gift. Tree planting.
Freshette tea in Caf. Graduates and
friends welcome.
8:30 p.m.—Players' Club Alumni
Play, University Theatre. Presentation of "By Candle Light," by P. G.
Wodehouse. A portion of net proceeds to Brock Memorial fund Graduates may get 75 tickets for 25c in Mr.
Horn's office. Others may get tickets for 75c, 50c end 25c at Kelly's
box office on and after April SO from
12 to 6 p.m. and at Box office on
campus on May 5.
Wednesday, May 6th
3 p.m.—Special Congregation for
Honorary degrees. Auditorium. Invitations for graduating class at registrar's office.
Dedication of Brock Memorial site.
Official University Reception in
gymnasium for those attending special
7:00 p.m.—Acting-Dean Turnbull's
banquet for graduates of App. Sc.
faculty. Aztec Room, Hotel Georgia.
7:00 p.m.—Dean Clement's Banquet
for graduates of Agriculture faculty,
York Room, Hotel Georgia.   Formal.
Thursday, May 7th
3:00 p.m., Congregation. Academic
dress. Graduates meet In library
cloak room at 2:15 p.m.
Alumnae tea in cafeteria for those
attending congregation.
7:30 p.m. — Convocation Banquet
Crystal Ballroom, Hotel Vancouver,
followed by Annual Meeting. Free to
graduates who make reservations.
Sign list at bottom of Caf. stairs before May 1.
Note—Class fees are payable at Students Council office before May 1st.
Members of the graduating class
and members of the Alumni who are
returning for anniversary celebrations
will be entertained at the "Twenty-
first Anniversary Ball" in the Commodore from 9 to 2 on May 4. Bob
Lyon and his 12-piece orchestra will
supply the music. Admission to graduating class by ticket only. Tickets
obtainable at Students' Council office until May 1.   No tickets mailed.
Alumni may buy tickets at door
after being identified.
Was Secretary In
Registrar's Office
Miss Helen English, a graduate of
the University of British Columbia
and secretary in the Registrar's office,
passed away suddenly on the evening
of Saturday, April 19.
Miss English was a graduate of this
University, entering from the Kaslo
High School in 1918 and graduating in
1922 from the Faculty of Arts. After
graduation she took a course in secretarial work, and for some years was
secretary to the principal of the Provincial Normal School in Vancouver.
Later she was secretary in the office of the Provincial School inspectors in Vancouver, and from 1927 till
the time of her death she was a member of the Registrar's Office Staff, An
efficient worker, she was well loved
in the office.
Miss English is survived by her
parents, Mr. and Mrs. William English, of Kaslo; she was an only child.
Special  Congregation To Grant  Honorary
Degrees Will Be Held May 6
Three B.C. Men — Robie L. Reid, Justice
Denis Murphy & E. A. Cleveland Honored
Six men, outstanding in fields ranging from engineering to
education, will receive Doctor of Laws degrees from the University of British Columbia at the Special Congregation to be
held on Wednesday, May 6, in the U.B.C. Auditorium.
The men to be honored are Mr. E. A. Cleveland, Dr. Harold
Hibbert, Dean David Thompson of the University of Washington, Mr. Robie L. Reid, K.C., Mr. Justice Dennis Murphy, and
Sir Ernest MacMillan.
The granting of the degrees will be in connection with the twenty-first
anniversary of U.B.C. and will be attended by all the pomp and splendor of
such affairs.  The regular Congregation will be held the following day, May 7.
Each of the men to receive degrees will give a short address during the
ceremonies. Invitations have been sent to members of the graduation class,
friends of recipients of degrees, dignitaries of church and state and men and
women prominent in educational circles.
• • * •
Buckingham to Direct
"Candle Light," a comedy of
mistaken identities, originally
written by Siegfreid Geyer and
adapted by P. G. Wodehouse,
is the play chosen by the
U.B.C. Alumni Players Club
for presentation at the University Theatre on the evening of
Tuesday, May 5. Proceeds from
the play will go to the Union
Building Fund, the committee
in charge expressing the hope
that many of the Graduating
Class and the Alumni will attend.
William Buckingham, well known
for his Little Theatre work, will direct ''Candle Light." Prominent in
the cast will be Bill Haggerty, William Buckingham, Mrs, Letson. Malcolm Pretty, Dorothy McKelvie Fowler, Bill Rose, Margo McGee and Alec
Members of the Graduating Class
may secure their tickets for the play
from Mr. Horn or their class executive. They will be able to get one
75 cent ticket for 25 cents. Tickets
for the general public, priced at 25,
50 and 75 cents, can be bought from
Kelly's Piano House, members of the
Alumni Players' Club or Mr. Horn.
Exchange tickets may be exchanged
at Kellys on Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Monday before Ude play,
from 12 to 6 in the afternoon. The
play will be on Tuesday, May 5.
Graduates and others intending to
see "Candle Light" are urged to secure their tickets as early as possible. Last year the Alumni Players
turned crowds away because of the
large ticket sale. This special production is primarily for graduates, and
they should be certain of getting
Ticket sales are under the direction
of David Brock, while the Business
Manager is Don McDermid. Nancy
Symes is arranging properties. Tommy Lee, who has long been esrociated
with U.B.C. dramatics, will be on
the job as Stage Manager. Avis Pum-
fiey will look after publicity
President's Tea At
Hotel Vancouver
On Monday, May 4
A tea and reception for members
of the Graduating Class, the entire
staff, the Senate and the Board of
Governors will be given by President
and Mrs. L. S. Klinck in the Oak
Room of the Hotel Vancouver on
Monday, May 4.
The tea will be from 2 till 4 in the
afternoon, with tha Deans of the
faculties and their wives receiving.
Wives of the members of the Board
of Governors will pour.
Mr. Cleveland has been a resident
of the province for forty years and is
now president of the Engineering Institute of Canada. From 1913 to 1926
he was Provincial Comptroller of
Water Rights and Consulting Engineer to the Provincial Government.
In 1926 he became Chief Commissioner of the Greater Vancouver Water
District and was appointed Chairman
of the Vancouver and Districts Joint
Sewerage and Drainage Bourd.
The First Narrows pressure tunnel
built under the direction ol Mr.
Cleveland is unique in being not only
the first of its kind in Canada, but
also the only one on the Pacific
Coast. He has given reports on the
power supply of the Cheakamus River
and irrigation problems of the Brunette River.
Dr. Harold Hibbert, on the staff of
McGill University, obtained his Ph.D.
at Leipzig. In 1910 his investigations
in the field of explosives were recognized as major contributions to the
industry. In the early part of 1918 he
was appointed Advisory Chemist for
the British War Commission in Washington, and after the armistice accepted a post in chemistry at Yalo
University. In 1935 he became the
E B. Eddy Professor of Industrial and
Cellulose Chemistry at McGill University. Dr. Hibbert is a Fellow of
the Royal Society of Canada.
Dean David Thompson of the University of Washington is a Canadian
by birth and an honor graduate of
Toronto. Since 1931 he has bean vice-
president of the University of Washington, having joined the staff in 1902.
Mr. Reid was a member of the original Board of Governors of U.B.C.,
serving on the Board from 1913 to
1935. For several years he was president of the Vancouver Public Library Board and since 1927 has been a
Bencher of the Law Society of B.C.
Mr. Reid is one of the best known
barristers in British Columbia and
was for many years a partner of the
late W. J. Bowser. He is a collector
of Canadian Books and a student ot
Canadian history, particularly that of
British Columbia.
The fifth recipient of an honorary
LL.D. will be the Hon. Mr. Justice
Denis Murphy, a native son of British
Columbia. He was called to the bar
of B.C. In 1896 and from 1890 to 1892
he represented tne constituency of
West Yale in the Provincial Legislature. In 1906 he was appointed Judge
of the Supreme Court of B.C.—a position which he has filled ever since.
He was for 18 years a member of the
U.B.C. Board of Governors
Sir Ernest MacMillan is a son of
thc Rev, Dr. Alexander MacMillan,
noted hymnologist. Two years ago
Sir Ernest was one of the adjudicators
at the BC. Musical Festival. Still a
comparatively young man, he is conductor of the Toronto Symphony Orchestra, head of the Toronto Conservatory of Music, and Professor of
Music at Toronto University. In 1934
he had knighthood conferred upon
him by the late King.
On Thursday, May 7, Congregation Day, Graduates to-be
must be nt the Library by 2:15
p.m. for roll call. Punctuality Is
The committee will provide ice
cream, tea and coffee at the Bowen
Island picnic May 2. All other refreshments must be brought by the
 _,„4.1 grads themselves, ftgi Two
Tuesday, April 28, 1936
Musical Society
Elect Officers:
"Pirates" Loses
Bill Cameron will succeed Vera
Radcliffe as president ot the Musical
Society here, it was announced as a
result of the spring club elections
held recently.
Vice president during the next term
will be Margaret Atkinson while Marjorie Findlay was elected secretary.
Harry Bigsby, popular orchestra
leader, will handle the business ot the
Society. Kay Washington and Bob
McLellan were elected to the positions of production manager and
treasurer respectively.
"Pirates of Penzance" realized a
slight deficit, it was revealed, but the
weather at the time of the production
was exceedingly unfavorable.
Wedding Bells To
Ring For Betty
The Caf is about to lose c/ne of its
most popular waitresses according to
a well authenticated report. Known
to thousands of grads and undergrads
as "Betty," Miss Betty Klassen is
about to assume the tie that binds.
Although she was not available for
interview, the other waitresses confirmed the report. The lucky man's
name is unknown. Nevertheless, she
is definitely headed altarwards. "That
la, unless she changes her mind,"
they added as an afterthought.
Undergrads Represent A
Variety of Occupations
By Jim Beverldge
A complete and representative picture of nearly every phase in the modern social scheme is that provided by the information on Occupations of Parents, compiled by the Registrar's office. Undergrads at U.B.C. in the 1935-36
session quite literally represented the butcher, the baker, the banker, the
businessman, the chiropractor, the pipe-layer and the wholesaler.
and Graduates
Made in our own
Ask for Prices
and Sorority
Original Designed
Dance  Programmes -
Tickets and Favors
Membership Cards
and Invitations
Printers and Stationers
566 Seymour Street
150 occupations, prosaic and intriguing, industrial and commercial, urban and rural, are given, with 217
parents engaged In unspecified trades.
Largest single specified groups represented by their sons and heirs at U.B.
C are the Engineers, with 108; the
Retired, either on pensions or on accumulated earnings, 107; and the
merchants, with 102.
From a political point of view, Capital, Labour, and the Bourgeoisie are
interestingly balanced. Big Business
presumably accounts for the 12 Bankers, 30 Brokers, 24 Businessmen, 2 Directors, 2 Financiers, 7 Manufacturers,
and 2 Trustees listed. Industry, with
its 108 Engineers carrying the banner,
embodies 2 Blacksmiths, a Boilermaker, and a Bricklayer; 12 Electricians and an Electric Welder; 7 Machinists and 7 Mechanists; a dozen
Miners and 4 Smeltermen.
The power of the printed page is
attested by the Advertiser, the Author, the 2 Editors, the Printer, and
tht- 3 Publishers tabled, while the
power of persuasion is borne witness
to by the 57 Agents and the 30 Salesmen,
Ensuring the well-being of the
body spiritual and physical are 55
Clergy, a Chiropractor, 19 Dentists, 71
Doctors ,and the Nurse; 55 Teachers,
17 University Faculty, and 2 independent non-union Professors minister to
the mind and the intellect.
Government services and the Law
account for a considerable number of
parental avocations. 23 Civil Service,
10 Customs Officials, 2 Indian Agents,
16 Inspectors and 6 Vancouver City
Employees are in government employ;
while 4 Judges, 53 Lawyers, a Legislator and 2 Police maintain the forces
of Right.
Illustrative of the extent an? importance of Vancouver's marine activity are the 8 Master Mariners, the
Sailor, the Sea Captain, the four Ship
Builders and Ship-wrights, the Shipping Master and the 3 Steamship Captains. Industrial and Agricultural resources of B.C. likewise find expression in the 54 Farmers, the 6 Fishermen the Fish Packer, the Logger, the
25 Lumbermen, the Metallurgist, the
7 Mining men and the 18 Ranchers,
whose sons and daughters took courses
at U.B.C. this past year.
Devoted to the production and presentation of the finer things of life are
the Chef, the Distiller, the Golf Professional, the Jeweller, the Mushroom
Grower, the Musician, the Theatre
Operator, and the Upholsterer — remote and specialized trades with but
one representative of each listed. Occupations entirely glamorous are the
mystic trades of the 3 Detectives, the
Physical Culturist, the Plant Pathologist, and the Chipper—extensive research having failed to show even
what a Chipper is.
The general significance of the figures and information provided by this
census Is of interest. It seems conclusive proof that the University Is
in reality a democratic IrJtitution
where students represent families engaged in every field of modern busi-
Ubyssey Presents
Special Issue
With this special issue after
exams, the Ubyssey sets a new
policy by bringing out a paper
to give news of activities during Graduation Week . "Issue
No. 40" will also attempt to
cover varsity events since late
in March, when the loat paper
was published.
Members of the Ubyswy staff
ire undertaking the work ad-
Iressing and mailing of 4500
oples of this issue—no small
ask. Every undergrad, graduate, and many of the Alumni
are to receive copies. If there
are any students missed in the
mailing, papers will be available at the Students' Council
office on the campus.
The Ubyssey staff is grateful
for the assistance offered by the
Executive of the Graduating
Classes and the Alumni Association in publishing this special
Nora Gibson Will
Head Thespians
For Next Year
At the annual meeting of tho U.B.C.
Players Club when reports were
given and officers elected, Noia Gibson was chosen President ot the club.
Nora was Treasurer of the Players
this year and has had long experience
in executive work.
Pat Larsen was elected Vice-President, and Hazel Wright, defeated candidate for President, won the position
of Treasurer. Hazel Merton was selected Secretary and the Executive
committee will consist of Grahame
Darling, Ludlow Beamish and Ellen
"She Stoops on Conquer", the 1936
production, was financially successful
reported Les Allen, business manager.
The play will visit several Vancouver
Island cities.
ness activity. The considerable divergence of type occupations and incomes would indicate that no one
class or clique is at all dominant in
University affairs; and that the University, rather than being a glorified
seasonal resort for the sons of the
privileged, is truly an intellectual centre where all classes and tyf.ns converge to evaluate for themselves the
life and system about them.
Following is a complete, detailed
program for Class Day, Tuesday, May
5. The functions will proceed as outlined—the success of the day being
largely dependent on the prompt arrival of the members of the Graduating Class In the Auditorium at 2:15
p.m. At the conclusion of '.he tree-
planting, the Freshettes will entertain
the Graduating Class at a Tea Dance
in the Gymnasium.
1. The class will assemble in the
Auditorium at 3:00 p.m.
2. The Class President will meet the
Chancellor, the President md the
Honorary Class President in the Administration Building, and they will
then proceed to the stage of the Auditorium.
3. The Class President will outline
the purpose of Class Day Exercises,
and will introduce Chancellor McKechnie, President Klinck, ana Colonel H. T. Logan who will in the order named, briefly address the class.
4. The Class President will call on
the authors of the Class Poem, the
Class Prophecy and the Class Will.
5. The Class President will call on
the Valedictorian who will deliver
the Valedictory Address.
6. The Class President will outline
thc nature of the Valedictory gift, and
deliver the cheque, or other token
representing the gift, into Jie hands
of the Chancellor.
7. The Class President will detail
the program for the rest of the day.
8. The Chancellor and Class President will leave the stage, followed
by the President and Honorary Class
President, who will be followed by
the rest of the class executive, members of the class and their fnends.
9. The procession shall, in this order, proceed in pairs by way of the
front door ot the auditorium, to the
site of the Class Tree on the rest side
of the Gymnasium.
10. The Class President will state
the purpose of the Class Tioe, and
will then call on the Honorary Class
President, who will address thc class
11. The Claas President will fill ln
the hole, the Honorary President
holds the tree meanwhile. The Vice-
president waters it. The Honorary
President then declares the tree
planted in the name of the year.
12. The Class will then break up and
go into the Gymnasium to be entertained at a Tea Dance by the women
of the Freshman Cliss,
Clothes don't make the Student
- - but they often make
the  successful  graduate!
We will admit that a ravishing dress won't improve your
exam grading appreciably, but after graduating, a well-
dressed woman certainly has the edge on her studious
sister. How much you spend does not matter as much as
how well you choose. Make sure your clothes are individually becoming, in good taste and properly fitted; of
course poor quality cannot be disguised.
The obvious place to find such clothes is at Madame
Runge's, who specializes in really smart clothes of thc
better sort.
Suggestions tor Early Summer
A  neatly   tailored   jacket   suit   is   an   investment
at $25.00.
A tweed coat is smart and trouble free for daily
wear.   $25.00.
A neat print dress (not too frilly) is just the thing
for under that coat.   $17.50.
A chiffon or silk crepe suit leads you straight to
summer chic.   $17.50, $25.00.
And don't forget the hat to complete a smart ensemble.
Library Lost By
Survey School
Bill  Sargent  Directs
Travelling Players
2566 Granville
Near Broadway
The Library is in the middle
of the Mall. At least, that's
what one team of amateur surveyors from Science '39 found
when they came to figure out
their results, after a few days
field work.
Budding engineers are giving the
campus its annual survey. From the
ploughed fields of the Aggie department to the lower end of the Mall,
groups can be seen squinting through
transits, and dragging chains around.
One of the main features of the
work seems to be the individual
schools of thought which prevail.
E:ich student in a group apparently
belongs to a different school, and
maintains that every one elso in the
gnng is crazy, and—that that traverse
is all screwy. The others come.back
with their arguments, that he doesn't
know how to handle the equipment
anyway, and anyway, if he thinks
the Science Building is a thousand
feet from the bus stop . . .
It's all part of their course, but it
seems to be even more of a guessing
contest than the exams. If one person in a group gets perfect marks, it
seems almost certain. that the others
will end up with zero. However, it
must be clone, as all engineers must
be able to tell where the Library is.
Work will go on for several days
yet. All the buildings on tho campus
must be placed correctly, end that
lost hundred yards must be found before the field books are handed in.
The ultimate result of the work will
bo a magnificent coat of tan, and a
growing conviction that one is In a
class with a bunth of morons. — N.
R. D.
Glittering actors and glamorous
actresses become their own stagehands, valets, costumers and travelling companions when the U.B.C.
Players' Club embarks this Friday on
its tour of Vancouver Island. Victoria, Courtenay and Qualicum comprise the restricted itinerary of this
year's tour.
Five days are given over to the
trip, and allowance is made for a
balmy one-day holiday at vjualicum,
celebrated Island resort.
Audrey Philips, a hometown girl
who made good, will doubtless convulse the audience of Courtney, her
native city, with delight.
Thc Players travel by train up the
island, stopping at hotels en route.
The possibilities for fun and diversion
at rural hostelries are endless.
Miss Dorothy Jefferd will accompany the student actors, surveying
their deportment and their box-offices in place of Miss Dorothy Somerset, who leaves this week as a Vancouver delegate to an international
drama conference at Richmond, Virginia. Bill Sargent wil act as director on tour.
The great volume of work involved
in travelling a. play is disconcerting
to actors facing it for the fust time.
Construction and painting of a portable tour set, and arrangements for
properties at each port of call, are two
considerations of major importance.
The play must also be adapted to different types and sizes of i>tage and
theatre. Bill Robertson, travelling
with the company, will direct staging
and scenery arrangements.
"She Stoops to Conquer" leaves for
Victoria this Friday morning, and returns the following Tuesday.
The women of the freshman class
will welcome all graduates and their
friends to the Tea Dance immediately
following Class day exercises and the
tree  planting ceremony on May 5.
The undergrads will be relieved to hear that, contrary to general
belief, Cam Gorrie is going on a busman's holiday
Holidays, however, do not always mean loafing to every student.
To Freth Edmonds they mean daydreams and nightmares of empty canned tins ... to Alan Walsh dragging hot dogs from one door-
slam to the next selling magazines . . . and to Lloyd Hobden a temporary adoption of a Dad's Cookie Car.
The lure of tthe sea as always finds response in a few gallant
swains . . .
Pat Larsen is following in the wake of his Viking ancestors by
exploring the fjords of British Columbia in a tugboat . . .
Doug Wilson is doing his bit for The Jubilee by making leaky
lifeboats while J. Gould, on the other hand, will be doing his utmost
to resist the call of the sea while driving a sightseeing car around
Jasper Lake.
For those who have not as yet found time to plan their summer
Kathleen Elliott in the Roger's Building will be an invaluable help.
Her suggestions for holidays on the Pacific Coast are based on recent visits and her "friendly service" will save both the experienced
and the inexperienced traveller a lot of grief.
Thre is no extra charge for her information, the bookings or the
detailed itinery so no one should take a chance of not choosing the
right place this year.
Ken Grant discovered that he had to deny his student birthright
to get a mess of pottage in a lumber camp . . .
Don Hogg is finding his U.B.C. training of distinct advantage in
his work in a casket factory ... so it would seem that our students
are learning early to fill their little niches in every corner of society.
Grads and undergrads who plan to spend any of their summer at
resorts should call around at Fred Holme's smart shop on South
Granville. He is carrying the newest line of sport toggery for both
men and women ... all kinds of fancy knit cotton sweaters . , .
slacks, shorts and the latest in good-looking tennis wear.
University students have been seen lately riding on tandem bicycles. Marjorie Waugh is carrying one of the smartest costumes for
coeds who are habitual cyclists ... a pleated checked jacket with a
culotte skirt to go with it (you may know it as a divided skirt). Some
of these in white are prefered by tennis fiends to any other costume.
We have word that Garret Livingstone (ex Players' Club member)
is making a name for himself in Hollywood . . . Tommy Lea, from
the same organization, is also in the film colony.
Rhodesia is claiming two of our brightest young grads . . . Bruce
Woodsworth is going Hottentot hunting while Gordon Cummings is
collecting fleas as a sideline.
Suits-: are leading this spring in the fashion forecast, and with it
comes the news of a special perfume put out by Jaegar to wear with
tweeds called Jaegar Bracken . . . carried exclusively by Marjorie
Waugh. ,
The Lingerie Shop was also thinking of suits when they ordered
a specially large shipment of blouses . . . linens of every pattern and
color and the daintiest of sheers.
As suit accessories are smart neckwear and the new icebox flowers
which can be found in great variety at The Lingerie Shop.
Good news! To wear with white Phoebe's Hosiery Shop suggests
two of this year's shades . . . copper glow  and  burnt copper . . .
both guarranteed to be the most stunning compliment to the white
Have you ever heard of junk-sail red? The explanation is at the
Tweed Shop on Howe near Robson. If your curiosity also responds
to flamingo, crocus yellow or watergreen by all means don't fail to
gaed upon the bolts and bolts of Island woven tweeds lining the walls
of the Tweed Shop.
The new Armoury opening evidently called the beauty of the
tartan to the eyes of Vancouverites for Marjorie Waugh has been attempting to fill the demand for tailored tartan blazers.
Her beach sandals, bathing suits and fashionable fish-net scarves
are causing much delighted comment from freshettes and seniors
The Class Prophecy created around caf tables by prominent seniors
and grads has Alan Morley listed as the future editor of "Hush" , . .
Lew Cunningham as a model for a toothpaste ad . . . Wilson MacDuffee as finding out more about rowing for his next campaign speech
. . . Harry Housser as a general sharker specializing in selling autographs , . . Bill Robertson as a drama censor . . . Norman Moodie a
pawn broker . . . Betty Moscovitch will be doubling for Mae West
. . . Harold Haikala and Horace West are both listed as professional
hecklers . . . Doreen Agnew will be a mistress in a girls' school . . .
Frank Stevenson said to have gone in a bank because he thought he
would like the change . . . Constance Brown will be a raffle ticket
seller . . . John Cornish will attain his dream as movie star . . . while
it is propheside that Gwon I^m wilt be a professional hitch-hiker.
*!«■►<>«», >«»,)<
To the Graduates — Good Fortune
University Boulevard
A business training is always an asset
Sprott'Shaw Schools
DAY AND NIGHT Tuesday, April 28,1936
Page Three
Mucksters Visit
For Novelty
Strange Practices
The other day the Muck staff came
out of the Pub office for a few minutes. (As a matter of fact they were
thrown out. The janitor wanted to
sweep under them). A strange fact
became evident. Little bells jangled
in the buildings on the campus. As
soon as this happened, the halls filled
with people. They went into other
rooms. Other bells rang. All was
The followers of Etaoin decided to
investigate this phenomenon. There
followed the bloodcurdling story of
the shameful secret orgies of U.B.C.
The room is full. Students hang on
the window sills. Chairs are brought
in from the Common Rooms, finally
there is no room left, except a small
space around the platform. A white-
haired little man struts in, scornfully
pushing aside anyone who happens
to be in his way. He pause* to pull
the noses of a few unfortunates who
had come late and had to sit in the
front row.   He mounts the platform.
"At the close of lawst hour we were
discussing the Elizabethans."
He leers at the class and everyone
After a turn or two around the platform, he gets the following off his
chest: "I was born a Presbyterian,
raised an Anglican, and am now a
confirmed and practicing pagan."
He leers at the class and everyone
Two new Ubyssey reporters dash off
to the Pub office to put this in "What
People Are Saying."
The man paces up and around for
a moment, then talks for a while of
the decay of western civilization.
"I would rather be dirty end live
in 1635 than clean and live in 1935."
He leers at the class and everyone
Seven more Ubyssey reporters come
dashing into the Pub office yelling
that they've got a hot one for "What
People Are Saying."
Meanwhile, the man on the platform
has turned his attention to sophomores. "If I were in 1635, at any
rate I wouldn't be teaching grub-by
lit-tle sophomores."
He leers at the class and everyone
At this juncture the bell rings, and
the entire two or three hundred in
the class squeeze madly out of the
door, and pour into the Pub office,
mouthing crazlly about "What People
Are Saying."
It is a small room. The great math
professor wanders dreamily in,
thumbs over the pages of an Algebra
book, and looks abstractedly about
him. He takes the attendance, and
looks at the book.
"Are there any questions from last
About eight hands go up, and he
selects a question. He puts it on the
board and commences to work It. This
goes on for three-quarters of an
hour, at which time he says: "And,
now, squaring out, and cancelling, I
get . . . That  isn't right . . ."
The class bears this patiently
"Did anyone get this question?"
A hand goes up
"Well, you can get it from him."
The great man then proceeds to
new work.
"This author's proof of this i.s not
so good. Now in the Analytic Geometry,  I ■ . ."
The class is used to this, so it restrains   any   homicidal   impulses. ;
"As a matter of fact, the whole section is not so Hood. At present I am
also writing an Algebra book. Take !
these proofs."
This occupies twvnty minu.es. Five j
minutes after the bell rings he lets
them go, nnd strolls back to his office,   muttering,  "Now  let's see . , . . I
Chapter    Six . . . Complex    Numbers I
Tho   class   is   there.    Everyone   is ,
there.   A man walks in, slowly, and
mounts the platform.   As soon as he
gets   there,   he  closes  his  eyes,   and
This is a girl.
She has a bat.
The bat has no wings.
Maybe she was out on a bat
Maybe it isn't that kind of a bat.
This is a cow.
The cow looks like a Senior Editor.
The cow is going Into the building.
Maybe the cow is hungry.
If it expects to find hay in an apartment house Its crazy.
This is a man.
He is running to a nine o'clock.
Won't he look silly, walking in in his
Maybe people will think he is a
biology specimen.
Maybe he is.
Litany Coroner
One never
knows just
what in
hell (Teh!)
one is going to
write about when
one starts one of these
However, it is started
If I don't hurry
up and say
it will be
In fact, I think It
even is.
does not open them for the rest of
the lecture.
When he speaks, his voice Is a
slow drawl.
"We will now discuss sexual reproduction."
Two sciencemen who have strayed
in  nudge each other and laugh.
Tho co-vds blush. The professor
blushes. Everyone blushes. He hurriedly  speaks;
"We will now discuss the emoeba."
And he goes all over tho amoeba
That night, there is a shot in the
Applied Science Building, The next
morning ho is found there, with a
tragic little note beside him.
"They laughed. Every lecture for
three weeks they laughed. I couldn't
face it. I knew I would never get
around to actually discussing it. This
is the best way out for me."
With this issue the Muck page inagurates a new policy (it hopes). Really it is a return to an old policy. The
traditional devil-thumping of the Muck pages of yore
shall be our aim. Once again shall the print shop resound
to the cries of the myrmidons of Shrdlu Etaoin, Muse of
Muck, giving battle to Senior Editors and their black cohorts . . . striving to keep the sacred columns of page
three unsullied by news.
Once again shall all the figures known of old . . .
Rufus McGoofus, Prof. Garglem X. McHootch, Maybelle
McGillicuddy, Cyrius de Screpansi, and all the dear little
people display their talents on the Muck page,
But enough. Let up, as the bishop said to the actress, get on with it.
This is the stor« of Freddy Wirple.
It is a tragedy.
Freddy Wirple was a good boy. He
was a very good boy. In fact, the
outstanding thing about Freddy was
his goodness. Even when he was very
young, his mother would say to his
Aunt Sadie, "Sadie, isn't Freddy a
good boyl"
And his Aunt Sadie would say, "Yes
indeed he is!"
Popular tradition to the contrary,
Freddy did not die young. In fact,
he flourished like any ordinary child.
But he was never bad. No indeed.
On the contrary, he got be tier and
At last came the fateful day when
Freddy entered University. He came
unheralded and unsung, yec within
a week his goodness was the sensation of the campus. Staid professors
would lurk in the hallways to bask in
the beaming goodness of his smile,
and when he had passed them, pure
unadulterated goodness shining in his
face, like wet paint on a fire hydrant,
they would return, whistling gaily, to
their rooms, where the one would say
to the other.
"Isn't Freddy a good boy!"
And the other would say to the one,
"Yes, indeed he is."
Things came to such a pass that
Freddy's goodness became the chief,
nay, the only topic of conversation
in the Women's Common Room. Various co-eds tried to do something
about it, but their efforts were to no
avail. Freddy was much too good
for them.
But alas! Nemesis lay in wait for
the unwary Freddy. It all began on
one of those gorgeous spring-like
days which occasionally visit our February campus. To Freddy it seemed
that his feet moved with a lightness
and grace other than human, and a
strange burgeoning filled his breast.
He was standing in the Quad with a
group of dashing young sports basking in the glorious sunshlna when
one of the crowd, a bold, leckless
sort of fellow, made a suggestion
which stunned them to momentary silence in its sublime daring.
"Let us," he cried, "proceed to the
Caf and partake of some Caf Coffee!"
No doubt it was a slight intoxication produced by a combination of
the air and the burgeoning which
prompted Freddy to follow. Be that
as it may, he found himself shortly
after seated at a shiny Caf table,
before him a thick cup brimming
with a  turgid  murky  brew.
Ho stared at it fascinated, like a
rabbit charmed by a snake. As the
potent vapors mounted to his brain
a tingling sensation of utter abandonment swept over him, and a grayish
mist formed before his eyes . . .
After countless aeons of time he recovered consciousness with a start.
Someone was throwing cold water In
his face, and explaining to the crowd
thronging about the table, "He's
passed out.   Not used to it."
He stared about him wildly, and
started, aghast at what he saw.   Be-
Ubyssey Has
Literary Editor
In Europe
The Ubyssey brings you all the
news all the time. As their latest service to their readers they have sent
a special correspondent to Europe,
Ethiopia, etc. He is a man known to
all. .. the author of the "crackling
of thorns."   His first reports follow:
Dark sounds . . .
"Now is the
time Pietro."
Italy expects every man
to have a large family.
We go over
the top
at dawn.
* *   *   *
LONDON, APRIL 25,   (r.j.)-
Anthony Eden . .
.. . vain hope and
the smell
of a well-kept
peace treaty.
We cannot accept
your terms.
Little pig eyes . . .
Allemachtlg Oott!
• *   •   •
Please send me some more expense
money, as I am running short.—,4r.J."
fore him on the table lay his cup,
drained to the dregs.
Oblivious of the staring crowd
about him, he rose uncertainly to his
feet and tottered out into vbe open
air to drench his aching head in the
lily pond.
That was the beginning of the end.
The cruel drug seized upon bis unsullied nerves with the grip of an
octopus. It was but two days later
that he slipped stealthily down to the
iniquitous den. He ordered one cup,
and then in his frenzy, consumed another, and another, and yet another.
They found him wallowing among
spilled coffee and shattered cnlna, and
carried him off, screaming and gesticulating wildly, to his rme-thirty
Alas, the evil days drew on. Freddy
was as much a figure of note as before, but for quite different leasons.
Unkempt, unshaven, and unstrung, he
lolled about th Pub office or the Arts
Common Room, slipping surreptitiously below for another blbble every few
minutes. And little by little a wild
scheme began to form in his mind . .
Lord knows how he evaded the
watchman, but somehow he managed
to get into the iniguitous hell-kitchen
after closing hours. His eyes glistening with an unnatural light, he
stalked toward the coffee tar.k.
They found him In the morning, a
limp, bedraggled, sodden heap lying
iu a pool of the treacherous, murky
fluid, tho rubber tube ho had used
to drain the tank still clenched between his teeth. Sorrowfully they
gathered round him.
"Alas!"   they  groaned,    and   their
groaning was as the  groaning ot  a
Varsity 'bus going into high, "Alas!
He was such a good boylK
By the Old Minnesinger
Freddy the caustic
Beloved of pubsters
Sarcastic to sophomores
Jeering at juniors
Satiric with seniors
Strode to his class
Freddy the caustic.
Freddy the caustic,
Saturnine of mien
Not looking to right
Not. looking to left
With a sardonic smile
Strode to his class
Freddy the caustic.
Cedric the Senior
Mighty in football,
Valiant in debate
Strong in the mile
The light of Council
Strode to his class
Cedric the Senior.
Cedric the Senior
Stern of mien
Not looking to right,
Not looking to left
With a sanguine smile
Strode to his class
Cedric  the Senior.
Freddy the caustic,
Beloved of pubsters,
Sardonic of face,
Met at the door,
Stern of visage,
With a sanguine smile
Cedric the senior.
Cedric the senior,
Mighty in football,
A little gentleman,
Stood aside smiling
Letting him pass,
Sarcastic of mien
Freddy the caustic.
Freddy the caustic,
Politely as always,
Stood aside also,
Letting him pass,
Stern of mien,
With a sanguine smile,
Cedric the Senior.        ,
Cedric the Senior,
Taking the chance,
Strode to the door,
With a sanguine smile,
Bumping there,
Sarcastic of speech,
Freddy the caustic.
Freddy the caustic,
Sardonic as usual
Stepped aside calmly,
Stood aside straight,
Leaving the way open,
Allowing to enter
Cedric the senior.
Cedric the senior,
Sanguine as ever,
Stepped aside sternly,
Stood aside straight
Leaving the way open,
Allowing to enter
Freddy the caustic.
Freddy the caustic,
Cedric the senior,
Both seizing the chance
Stepped to the door,
Not looking aside,
Freddy the caustic,
Cedric the senior.
Cedric the senior,
Freddy the caustic,
Bumped h?rd together,
Gritting their teeth,
Smiling politely,
Cedric thc senior.
Freddy the Caustic.
Freddy  the caustic,
Cedric  the  senior.
Each gave way to the otht;r,
Bumped again together,
And  gave   way   again,
Freddy the caustic,
Cedric the senior.
Freddy the caustic,
Cedric  the senior,
Glared at each other,
Smiling  politely,
The bell shrilling loudly,
Freddy  the  caustic,
Cedric the senior.
Freddy the caustic,
Beloved  of pubsters,
Feature Staff
Shows General Staff
How To Do It
It has long been the ambition, of the
muck staff to write real editorials.
We have watched with envy those
lucky people whose job it is to write
them tapping out a word or two merrily after an Interval of two or three
hours. Aften studying the editorials,
we have decided that there are two
types—the casual, trivial, or space-
filler type, and the "big" editorial
Here they are:
The space filler—
We have noticed some people misbehaving in the Common Booms. We
are practically blushing from head to
. . . , well, never mind, as we, take
up our typewriter to write thi*. They
should not have to be told that they
are grown up now. We have noticed
that they park their gum under the
tables. We must ask them not to do
If they do this they may have some
college spirit.
*  *  *  *
And now, the "big" editorial, that
people really have opinions on;
It seems time that we should say
something on the subject of peace.
Some people say that war Is useless,
shameful, and cruel. Others tay that
it is necessary, though evil.
Now there is no doubt that war is
useless, although, when all factors ere
considered, and everything is taken
into'consideration, not only that in
the final analysis, although the opinion of some is to the contrary, it may
have some good results.
War is definitely a good, or bad
Of course, in making this statement, we must remember that there
are two sides to this (Our tide and
the wrong side).
There can be no doubt that this is
the correct evaluation of wai.
Or, White Shadows in
The Black Sea
Oretchen stared at the aspidistra.
He would not come today. She felt
sure of that. Slowly, heavily, she
rose, and walked to the bathroom
(No ... not barroom). She took out
a small dark glass bottle, and looked
at it. It said "Poison" on the label.
No. Not today. He might come tomorrow. She pulled out a handful
of her hair just to hear herself
•   •   •   •
Gretchen stared at the aspidistra.
He would not come today. She felt
sure of that. Slowly, heavily, she
walked to the bathroom. (No . . not
barroom) She took out ihe little
bottle and drained it to the dregs.
But it wasn't poison after all, which
all goes to show that you shouldn't
believe everything you read, ard the
next clay he came and they were married and lived happily ever after except that their little boy was four
years old when they married and always wondered why people laughed
when he told them how pretty his
mother looked when she married his
Smiling satirically,
Bruised and broken,
Eyes gleaming steely,
Strode from his cla'ss
Freddy the caustic.
Cedric the senior,
Mighty   in  football,
Stern of mien,
Bruised and broken,
Eyes glowing strongly,
Strode from his class,
Cedric  thc senior. Page Four
Tuesday, April 28,1936
(Member CJ.P., PXP.A.)
Telephone: Point Orey SM
Zoe Browne-Clayton
Dorwin Baird
Assistant Edlton: Dorothy Cummings, Alison Mcintosh,
Peggy Higgs
Sports Editor: Milton Taylor
Reporters: BUI Sibley, Stan Weston, Jim Beverldge, John
Dauphinee, Alan Morley, Bob King, Dave Smith,
Tim Dauphinee
Feature Editor: Norman DePoe
Mall Subscriptions |S.0O per year
Campus Subscriptions flJO per Yew
Printed by Point Orey News-Gexette Ltd.
2181 Wert 41st Avenue
Twenty-One Year*
Our University, the youngest Provincial
University in Canada is now twenty-one years
old. Two decades ago it was little more than
a dream. Today we are a permanently estab
lished institution with a recognized standing
among other Universities.
This year marks the end of the University's
youth. That youth was distinguished by a
plentiful supply of what is known as student
spirit. Beginning with the campaign to move
out to Point Grey and continuing through the
gymnasium and stadium campaigns the students have manifested their enthusiasm for the
developing institution in no uncertain manner.
Of late however, pessimists have been croaking
that the old spirit is dying out. Students have
Certainly they have changed, but not nee
essarily for the worse. Vigorous campaigning
is not as popular as it was. Beard growing
schemes no longer evoke enthusiasm. But that
doesn't prove that student interest has vanished. It is merely a sign that the newness is
wearing off. We are becoming older and more
mellowed. As the University becomes more
established there is less need for noise; a more
dignified form of publicity is in order, What
we will lose in enthusiasm we will gain in tradition. Let us hope that we will be as successful in gaining dignified traditions as we have
been in building a University.
The Red Menace Again
Universities are the home of Communism!
The accusation has been aimed again. This
time by a trivial but unfortunately well read
weekly. To us who are better informed the
whole article seems so ridiculous as to be
hardly worth considering.
Nevertheless such articles, foolish though
they may be, play a part in moulding the Public attitude towards Universities. It is a strange
but true fact that the general public receives
more favorably pictures of wild rah-rah anarchists than pictures of serious youths intent
on receiving an education. Such an attitude
has hampered the development of universities.
Universities ate suppose! to teach people to
think. But if the students in the process thinking are led to criticise any established custom
they are labelled red and accused of convening
with Russia for the downfall of the civilized
The only consolation to be obtained from the
situation is at least it effectively demonstrates
the modern world's need of a few more clear
thinkers. We as Univrsity students and graduates will be giving a value for our education
if only we can instil a few rational ideas into
the seemingly muddled mind of modern civilization.
• • • •
• • • •
WE FOOLED you! In fact, we fooled ourselves. After the last issue of the Ubyssey, we folded up our papers and prepared for
a long rest until next fall. But the fact that
this is the twenty-first anniversary of the University of British Columbia, and that the Graduation Classes and the Alumni are preparing
for a busy time during the first week in May,
made us decide that another Ubyssey could
do its part in making Graduation Week a success. So here is the paper, 4500 copies of which
are being mailed to grads and undergrads. We
hope this late issue will set a precedent for
other years.
THE other day, at Union College, five young
graduates became ministers of the gospel.
They are, undoubtedly, all men who desire to
consecrate themselves to their difficult task.
And a difficult task it will be. These days, with
their scientific outlook upon all aspects of life,
their trust in things natural rather than supernatural, are hard ones for the churches.
Church leaders, or the more progressive
ones, are attempting to teach a new religion
that will be adaptable to the callous attitude
of the present generation—not a callous religion, but one that can penetrate our callous
It will be the graduates of our theological
colleges, including those on the U.B.C. campus, that will be the leaders in the religious
world of tomorrow. It will be their task to
preach and to teach to those of us who will inhabit that world. Let us hope that they are
determined to centre their lives about an attempt to overcome the indifference that so
many have about religion.
Dr. H. T. J. Coleman, speaking at the Union,
College Convocation, said that Theology must
return to its old place as "Queen of the Sciences." Tbe study of man and his religion must
be the most fascinating in the whole realm of
scholarship. Out of this study, and out of the
work of our theological graduates, must come
new evaluations of religion. Let us hope that
these will be such as to lead the thousands of
all creeds who have dropped their religion,
back into the fold again.
AGAIN members of the University Players
Club are going on tour. "She Stoops to
Conquer" will tour the length of Vancouver Island, delighting audiences wherever they go.
For more than a decade the Players have sent
their Spring offering throughout British Columbia in order that the people of the province
could enjoy spoken drama of the highest order.
But the tour has another, and perhaps even
more important result. The travelling thespi-
ans act as ambassadors of the University in
every town they stay. Too seldom do the
people of British Columbia come in contact
with U.B.C. The Adult Extension tours this
year have served   as similar   service   as  the
Players tour.
After all, the University is a Provincial organization, and there is no reason why every
person in B.C. should not benefit from such an
organization. The time must come when
U.B.C. follows the lead of other institutions in
establishing a department of extension for the
use of the general public. In the meantime,
we can thank the Players Club for their work
in taking the University to the people.
AS this is being written, the janitors are taking the examination boards from the Auditorium and packing them away for another
year. The Pub Office is cleaned out—hundreds
of old papers finding their way to the waste
paper basket, and books, lunch papers, coats
and hats are taken away.
On the stage members of the Players' Club
are rehearsing for their tour under the guidance of Bill Sargent. Hugh Palmer is in Mr.
Home's office arranging the financial details
of the trip.
By all the signs, the year is over. So, with
a smile in our hearts, we wish you a VERY
Our Exchange Editor
Covers War, Atheism
And Communism
While Canada's "Liberty" is
spraying the countryside with
a good liberal dose of "Red
Menace," down south of the
line American Universities,
led by Princeton and General
Smedley D. Butler, have become Peace conscious and the
ideas have spread into Eastern
Canadian Universities.
Intimations ot this movement have
been received recently from American sources but it is from the University of Western Ontario Gazette
that the latest, and fuller, elaboration
is received concerning the Student
Anti-War propaganda. From an Editorial labeled "Yellow Monkeys" we
learn that organization began at
Princeton in March in the form of
"the Veterans of Future Wars" and
has now spread to over fifty other
colleges of which the U. of Western
Ontario is one. From the Gazette editorial we quote: "The aim Jot the
Future Veterans is simply to ridicule
war. To this end, they demand from
the government a bonus of $1000 each,
to be paid at once before their recipients are incapacitated on the field
of battle. A Ladies Auxiliary has
also been formed, with the object of
securing funds to send future war-
mothers to Europe, where they will
look over prospective sites for cemeteries in which to bury the future
war dead."
Daily, as the wave of mirthful propaganda rolls on, the movement is
being added to and one wonders just
how far the human imagination can
stretch. In Toronto they have proposed a simple cenotaph in the form
of a park bench, on which future
veterans may rest. In Pennsylvania
the son of Gen. Butler has instituted
the Profiteers of Future Wars, and
yet from another college comes the
Propagandists of Future Wars who
ask to be subsidized while they practise writing atrocity stories. At
"Western" organization is well under
way and soap-box speeches, parades,
etc., have been organized.
Hardboiled General "Gimlet-eye"
Smedley Butler has been doing a little
spring cleaning this April and has
been barnstorming through the western states. The Washington Dr.ily describes the General as "the little sun-
bitten, scrappy dynamo of the Marine
Corps who looks like Jimmy Durante
and talks like Will Rogers." His
speech sounds like it. With all guns
on the job Butler harangued an audience of 2500 students in an anti-war
talk which started a petition drive
by Peace clubs for 50,000 names to
scrap the R.O.T.C, compulsory military training in the State of Washington. A similar petition has begun
in Oregon.
Your Exchange Editor has been
doing a bit of travelling these days.
In visiting an old friend here whose
tendencies are imperialistic to the nth
degee I ran into a backfire from Llb-
rty's article "the Red Menace in Canadian Colleges." From my friends
conversation I was given to understand that I had been residing in a
hot-bed of Red propaganda for the
last six months. He «ven looked at
me sideways to se, no doubt, if any
of the vile menace had adhered. I
was delighted, in no small sense of
the word, to declare that the crly discussion of politics that I had been
privileged to hear at U.B.C. was the
laying of pennies on the lino during
the see-saw progress of the Burrard
recount; and further, that I had had
th-e opportunity of reading a great
many of the newspapers of other
Canadian Universities and had found
college life proceeding merr:':y along
its way, oblivious to all revolutionary
While visiting a young friend of
mine who lies in a local hospital in
o plaster cast suffering from a bad
hip, I was asked about the University, This young man who is only
14, but amazingly well read r.nd religiously inclined, said, "What I don't
like about the Universiy is the Atheism that they talk."
My reply to- all such misinformed
persons is "come and see the University for yourselves." In ths meantime digest this excerpt from the Editorial columns of the Oregon Emerald: "Rather than hide behind the
great, archaic gob of the nmeteenth,
eighteenth,  and  seventeenth  century
A Cruel Story Of .
Concretia and Minutiae
I wandered In a pensive mood across the Mall one day,
Where I found a careworn student, and asked of him my way.
He said to me in mournful tones, "O come with me a while,
And you will see what happens in this institution vile."
/ did. We reached a classroom where a voice proclaimed the rules
Of the functions pedagogic in articulated schools,
Originally founded for the swarming hoi polloi,
In order to give "culture" to the growing girl and boy.
"Now notice, would you, for a while the purport of this motion,
The cerebrations of the men who first conceived the notion
That to bifurcate the system and to coelesce the stratum
Is sufficient motivation and a fine desideratum."
A hand shot up, a voice arose, "But really, Mr. Black . . ."
"I'm glad you raised that point, Poisson—it takes us off the track,
But even so, let's talk it out and see why all those folks
Iri Freedom's name left England and cast off their crushing yokes.
"A remarkable development was taking place just then,
For veritable galaxies of democratic men
Had found prepotent pathways toward* this splendid schema,
Which surely were much more than the surmises of a dreamer."
I thought "This may be culture, but it's really rather feeble" ...
The voice went on "Important too, the treat—i—sea of Froebel,
Whose adumbrated notions were concatenations verbal . . . ."
What did he mean?—Ah, could it be—the man / knew as Frobel?
"Let's get his point quite clear," said   he, "to obviate confusion,
In perusing: this great movement we have come to one conclusion,
So mind you, get this concept well ere other points arise,
You'll find It truly help/ul, I venture to surmise."
"Good Lord," I cried, "I must get out-this man is simply terrible!"
"Consider at this juncture please the constellations cerebral
Of Postalozsi, Locke, and th* philoropher John Dewey . . ."
I heard no more but fled and screamed, "Not Education . . . hooey/"
"Explain," I asfeed my student friends, "It does sound all too silly,"
"What, don't you know," they cried aloud, "Why, that's our little Willie,
He has ideations worthy of our wonderful democracy,"
"// that is the result," said I, "then give me aristocracy!"
"This is the hymn he sings at eve he goes to sleep,
We'll sing it"—and the chant arose from voices' loud and deep:
"I am full of information
That is not in any catalogue,
In fact 1 am the model
Of a really modern pedagogue,
The telle cerebration*
Of which there are a number
And cerebral constellations
Why, I say them in my slumber.
The picayune abstraction*
That.are found in many schools
Are concomitants resulting
From anthropomorphic rule*.
The mental convolutions
Of men in high positions
Are because they have avoided
Atomistic acquisitions."
Afeanderinp and other joys
I've always shunned as frivolous
And was never even tempted
To become a trifle bibulous,
Proceeding on the narrow way
Of insights pedagogical,
I near forgot that man was made
For ends not theological.
This fine agglomeration
Of my integrated knowledge
Is all because I persevered
And finally reached College.'
University Geologists Make
Important Mining Discovery
Recent development of a process of mineral classification
by Dr. Harry V. Warren and Jack Cummings of the Department
of Geology and Geography of the University of B.C. has attracted much attention in mining circles of the province.
conventions,  institutions  and  morals     By the construction of a grinding
they   prepare   for   leadership   in   -
changed world of streamlined trains,
social security, Pan-American clippers and equality of the sexes."
The University of Western Ontario
had the privilege in the latter part of
March of hearing Dr. Dafoe, famous
doctor of the Dionne Quintuplets. Dr. i
Dafoe, a country doctor, has some
pearls of wisdom which might be applicable almost anywhere. ". . .When
I receive a lengthy descriptive report
on a case, I figure they don't know
what they are really talking about,"
"some people who should die, won't,"
and "Trust the Lord and keep the
bowels open" . . . From the Faculty
of Medicine page of the U. of Western
Ontario Gazette, March 27.
All year I have been picking up
scraps of paper dropped by youth
whose spiritual pressure was a little
too much to bear. Believe it or not,
I have to go all the way to New Zealand to find an adequate note of appreciation of this phenomenon. From
"Smad", defined in its head as 'an
Organ of Student Opinion at Victoria
University College, Wellington, N.Z.',
March 18, comes this note of optimism: "The Student is a creature sui
generis; he frequently defies both
convention and classification. He
doesn't stand to reason, In fact there
are those who can make neither
rhyme nor reason of the undergraduate, but as Jowitt's neat refutation
runs, 4If one cannot get reason out of
young men, one can at
machine on a model developed in
England and improved on by Dr. G.
Gillies of the Department of Miner-
ology and Mettalurgy here, the U.B.
C. scientists are enabled to examine
polished sections of ore at a magnification of 3000 diameters, more
than 10 times the enlargement possible with old polishing methods.
Thus the minute particles of precious metal contained in the ore can
be seen and their exact form determined.
As the smallest particles into which
ordinary commercial milling practice
grinds tho ore appear more than 4
inches across at this magnification, it
is possible to prescribe tha correct
method of milling each particular ore,
an improvement that eliminates one
of the most expensive gambles of the
mining industry.
It Is possible that thc Board of Governors may arrange to have this type
if work done commercially at thc University, as i here Is on other place In
■lorth-westem Canada or United
States where It can be done at present.
This would mean a considerable increase in the staff of the Department,
as several specially trained geologists
would be needed.
Such  work would  be done   at   a
least    get charge which would little more than
cover the expenses involved. Tuesday, April 28, 1936
Page Five
Sherlock Looks
At New Council
(Continued from Page 1)
be able to help Lyle Vine with his
arduous monetary  duties since   she
was treasurer of W.U.S. last year.
Aforesaid Lyle Vine, treasurer of
A.M.S. for the ensuing year, is one
of "these scientific blokes." , He's
been a member of the executive of
Science '38, and anybody who can
handle the kind of students who fill
the front rows of the auditorium
with their presence, and the examination booklets each term with their
doubtful omnipresence should be able
to play a large part in keeping Council meetings orderly and businesslike.
Whether he will be able to correctly
survey the financial situation, overcome satisfactorily the stress and
strain of money matters, and engineer
things to end the year with a surplus, Is yet to be seen.
Then there's Audrey Horwood
whose gymnastic interests and activities will not, It is to be hoped, spread
fro mthe gymnasium to the Council
platform. President of the Women's
Gymnasium Club last year, and president also of Phrateres, she'll likely
cast many baleful glances at A.M3.
Mentor Gould as she tries to l>eep all
Council proceedings democratic and
"of benefit to every woman student
on the campus.' '
Two more journalists will next year
lose all tendencies toward the continued "freedom of the press" if they
follow precedent set by many other
writers In the past few years. John
Witbeck, M.U.S. representative who
edited the Science Supplement last
term, and John Logan, L.SE. member, erswthlle senior edtlor of this
college publication, will no more frequent the hovel which University authorities flatter by the name: Office
of the Publications' Board.
Saved for the last are the three
Council members who should provide
the    doggedness,    w-hoop-ee,    and
Dr. H. T. J. Coleman
It Speaker At
Radio Commentator
Over the -ur waves comes the
pleasant voice of Bill Newell
. . . news from all parts of the
world graphically described by
this brilliant young news commentator ! The Sun tells tho
complete news story !
Trinity 4111
The annual convocation of Union
College of the United Church was
held last Friday afternoon in the chapel of the college. The ceremonies
at which five theological students received their testamurs, was attended
by the Board of Governors end the
Senate of Union College, representatives of the University of British Columbia, representatives of the Anglican Theological College, and a large
crowd which filled the chapel.
The 1936 graduates who lecelved
their testamurs from the Kev. Professor W. H. Smith, D.O., were John
E. Bell, William A. W. Latimer, B.A.,
Daniel W. More, Stanley H. Pinker-
ton, B.A., and Robert P. Stobie.
The degree of Bachelor of Divinity
was conferred upon the Rev. Wilfred
Laurier McKay, B.A., whose thesis
dealt with "The Religious protest of
the Reformers.". Mr. McKay is pastor of the West Vancouver Baptist
Rev. Reginald A. Redman, pastor of
Grace United Church, was granted
a degree of Bachelor ot Theology.
Majoring in church history, Mi. Redman's thesis was "The Contribution
of Methodism to Social Progress." The
degrees were conferred by Principal
J. G. Brown, D.D.
The Daniel McPherson scholarships
for the highest standing ln the graduation class were presented to John
E. Bell and Stanley H. Pinkerton by
C. T. McHattie. Gerald 3. Punter,
B.A., and Charles 0. Richmond received the scholarships from the
Women's Educational Auxiliary for
high standing ln the second year. The
Alumni Scholarship for a first year
student went to George R. Pringle,
The convocation address wa* given
by Professor H. T. J. Coleman. Ph.D.,
of the U.B.C. Philosophy Department.
Dr. Coleman took as his topic. "The
Higher Unity of Studies."
"The time is coming, and perhaps
soon," Dr Coleman remarked, "when
theology will again be recognized as
"The Queen of the Sciences." The
speaker hoped for the time when theology would become the ioremost
subject for study.
The convocation ceremony was directed by Principal J. G. Brown, D.D.,
of Union College, and Rev. Biuce G.
Gray, Rev. J. S. McKay, Rev. William
Deans, and Rev. J. C. Switzer assisted. Callum Thompson sang "Open
the Gates of the Temple."
Student League"S.C.M.
May Unite Says Article
"Red Menace In Canadian Colleges"
'Exposed* By Popular Weekly
"Few people realize the fact, but the atheistic and Communistic Student League of Canada is at present just one step
removed from* control of the actions of the Student Christian
Movement," states an article by C. R. Ellis in a recent issue of
the Canadian edition of "Liberty."
The Liberty article, entitled "The Red Menace in Canadian
Colleges," gives an alleged exposure of the activities of the Student League in universities across Canada - "built up to spread
the Communist gospel to high school and college students, influencing an estimated 100,000 students."
S.CM, Denial Of
S.L. Connection
speedy efficiency that every administrative organization must have to
keep its electors contented and happy
—doggedness to fight continuously
against the strenuous opposition that
always comes up; whoopee to keep
the Ubyssey reporter assigned to the
beat in a cheerful frame of mind; and
speedy efficiency to cover the ground
so quickly that even the objectors
don't have time to object!
We present Dave Carey, English
rugger de-luxe with a pronounced
habit of forever plunging, plunging,
plunging, knowing at least part or the
time which way he is supposed to be
We present Beth Evans, w-hoop-
star on the senior women's basketball
team, and vice-president of the W.A.
S. last year.
And we present Howie McPhee,
Junior Member, a member of the
Canadian track team, captain of the
Track Club, and member of the Canadian track team to Australia.
May we be permitted one more
little pun. In his new position on
Council, McPhee will find it even
harder this year to keep his name out
of sprint.
University Book Store
Hours, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.; Saturdays, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.
Graphic Engineering Paper, Biology Paper, Loose Leaf
Refills, Fountain Pens and Ink, and Drawing Instruments
Crepe Paper for Masquerades, etc.
AH Your Books Supplies Sold Here
Mr. C. R. Ellis and "Liberty"
may think that the Student
Christian Movement if falling
under the Influence of the
Communistic Student League,
but Bob McMaster, General
Secretary for the S.CM. on this
campus, has other ideas.
After the article "The Red
Menace in Canadian Colleges",
tppeared in the popular week-
.y, the Ubyssey decided to find
(he truth of the statements in
ihe story. An interview with
McMaster brought forth the
following statement:
"Mr. Ellis' obvious lack ot
knowledge of the S.C.M. and its
policies Is sufficient ln Itself
to throw considerable doubt upon the falldity of his whole
article. The leadership of the
9.C.M. has been constantly opposed to a "United Front" with
the Student League of Canada
on any Issue. Any one knowing the present leadership of
the S.C.M. does not fear that
the Student League Is 'at pre-
lent just one step refoped from
control' of their actions."
In a letter to a Vancouver
newspaper John Prior, President of the U.B.C. Student
League, states the aim of his
society as follows:
"Our aim Is to encourage progressive opinion on the campus
by the study of problems relating to economics, science, history and the arts. We believe
that the study of Audon, Day-
Lewis and T. S. Eliot is more
pertinent to present day life
than the study of Tennyson,
Blake, etc. We don't believe
that controversial subjects
should be barred from educational institutions. We want to
read Stachey and Cole as well
ns Adam Smith."
Annual Contains New
Make-up Features
With two thirds of their production
already sold, the members of the 1936
Totem staff are resting on their oars,
and contemplating one of the most
successful years In the history of the
The book contains many novel features this year, the most outstanding
of which is the Introduction of several
striking full-page campus photographs.
Action photos In the Sports section
add to the novelty of the make-up.
A  few  copies of the  Totem are
still    available   In    the    Students'
Council office. It Is not necessary,
however, to be ln Vancouver to get
a Totem. Mr. Horn states that out-
of-town students may purchase one
by sending their two dollars—plus
twenty   cents   for   mailing—to   the
Students' Council Office, Room 303,
U.B.C. Auditorium.
Margaret Ecker was Totem Editor
during the past year, a great deal of
the  credit for   the   improved   style
being due to her efforts.   She was assisted   by   Pauline   Patterson,   Bob
King,   Bruce  Robinson,   Dick   Elson
and Ken Grant.   This staff bpent the
greater part of the academic year preparing the annual for the presses.
It was announced by Zoe Browne-
Clayton, Ubyssey Editor, that Jim
Beveridge will hold the position of
Totem Editor next year.
Class members may obtain exchange
tickets at reduced price of 25c from
Students' Council office. These are
regular 75c seats and may be exchanged at Kelly's box office after
April 30.
The play,  "By Candlelight''   Is an
excellent comedy worthy of the support  of the  Graduating  class.    Proceeds will be donated to the Brock
Memorial Building fund.
Mr. Ellis goes on to say that "allied
with the Student League and pledged
to support its policies are many student societies under other names.
These affiliated societies, and many
others which are only influenced but
not controlled by S.L. leaders, are designed to follow . . . the recently organized Communist Club at Ihe University of Toronto."
As if It wern't enough to have
our campus overrun with long-
bearded Communists, Mr, Ellis
charges that the Student League
hopes to take the S.C.M., "(he only
religious organisation extending Into all Canadian colleges," under its
". . . affiliated societies agree not to
voice any opposition to any part of
the Student League activities. This
is the snare which is about ready to
catch the S.CM. and keep it from
fighting the more objectionable activities of the S.L."
Quoting Morris Wayman, chief of
the national organization of the Student League, the Liberty article says,
"the growth of our organization from
a mere handful of students in Toronto into a national organization is
significant. Canadian students are on
the move."
Wayman seems to be the source of
the information regarding the "connection" of the S.CM. and the Student League. He says, "The Student
Christian Movement stands at the
cross roads. It is up to the S.L. to
plead our movement within the
S.CM. We must. .. swing the policy of the entire organization, starting
with the lower units if the upper cannot be influenced."
Tho S.C.M. may not know it, but
It seems as If they were about to be
absorbed  by campus Communists!
Wayman goes on to advise members
of the Student League to attempt to
influence student organizations, saying, "We are coming face to face
with great struggles. We must get
Into the organizations of the students.
We should fight to be elected to leading positions there. Much in the near
future depends on how we can draw
the existing organizations into action."
Mr. Ellis uses the McGill Labour
Club to show the relation between
Communism, the C.C.F., Socialism,
and the S.CM. This club changed
from C.C.F. to affiliation with the
Student League recently—and at the
same time increased its activities with
the Student Socialist Movement, a
branch of the S.CM.
After enlarging upon the Communist bogey, Mr. Ellis closes his "exposure" by showing the weaknesses
of the Student League.
"The S. L. is like a tapeworm
colled through Canadian colleges.
The head of this tapeworm is at
Toronto. People who know about
tapeworms say you can destroy
parts of the body, but the head will
grow a new body. However, If you |>
kill the head you have solved the
The author states that the head of
the Communist tapeworm, ut Toronto, is very sick. He gives as the
reason the attitude of President H. J.
Cody—who has allowed the young
radicals to go ahead without interference.
In the opinion of Mr. Ellis, ence the
prospect of martyrdom is past- our
young Communists will lose their enthusiasm for the "cause." He points
out that President Cody at Toronto
has allowed the young radicals to
blow off their steam to their heart's
The Liberty article, which starts by
sounding the alarm against the "Red
Menace," ends by quietly remarking
that there is no such menace in ex-
istance. Mr. Ellis' final statement is
that, ". . . If the depression continues,
students may become strong Socialists. ' But they will be Socialists in
a peaceful, law-abiding way. Th«y
will be C.C.F. Socialists, not Com-,
And there goes our Red Menace.
extend  their sincer  congratulations and best wishes on the 21st
birthday of
U. B. C.
The Budget Shop
Ihe importance of correctly fitted shoes, especially on the younger and more active feet, deserves your first consideration... While Budget
Shop Shoes are always the "high light" styles of
America, they are also built to fitting standards
required only in much higher price shoes - - -
Make this Budget Shop your permanent footwear "home" - - - you'll find It pays.
644 Granville St.
Revel in the Waves this Summer
with the feeling of safety created by a
WIRELESS Permanent Wave
Provide your hair against "salt-water-lankness" by the
latest method.
Our machines are cool, comfortable and light.
Bess'tt Beauty Shoppe
Granville at l«th
Sey. 5742
Popular Centre for Student Functions
Banquets   .   .   .   Teas   .   .   .   Dances
Windsor Room and Aztec Room available for dances—
either at a straight rental, or at a price per person, including refreshments.   Phone Head-waiter.
„     ,PH0£)L w 1519 W. Broadway
Bayview 3794-L at Granville
Gowns designed to the individual personality
We have openings for 25 students   -   men and women
to start work immediately
Phone Trinity 1906 919 Vancouver Block
Public Stenographer
Neat, Accurate Work
At Popular Lending Library
4489 W. 10th Ave.        P.G. 67
Hudson's Bay Company
congratulates the University of British Columiba
on twenty-one years of
S§J T>u^on'sT>Btt (tampaiuj-Jjjf
Page Six
Tuesday, April 28, 1936
Track   Club Stronger
But Other Sports Weak
Rowing, Golf, Best Minor Sports
Golf Team Takes Both
Inter-Collegiate Battles
Girls' Grass Hockey Team Wins All
League Games
The Rowing Club has completed its biggest year with a
win over St. Georges' School. Not a very impressive record for
a hustling club, but they have shown through two narrow losses
to Oregon State and Washington, that a good lightweight crew
can be turned out by Varsity.
This year's boat was composed of Mcintosh, Pearce, Darling, Jamieson, McDuffee, McLeish, Stevens, Morris and Saunders. Besides this crew, forty enthusiastic rowers turned out
Golf was the only Varsity team in 1935 to beat the junior
colleges in the south. Handy wins were turned in over Bellingham Normal and College of Puget Sound. Although Allen Sharp
Is club champion, Ted Charlton is considered one of the ace
golfers of B.C. Other players on the team are Livingstone, Wilkinson, Berry and Lightstone.
The   Girl's   Grass   Hockey   team
The outstanding achievements of
the Swimming Club were to place In
every event in the B.C. championships
and to-make a good showing against
one of the strongest college bw.'mming
clubs in America, University of Washington.
Besides having a membership of 50,
the Badminton Clu* produced two
outstanding players in the Lower
Mainland Championships—Stan Hay-
don and Ronnie Allen progressed as
far as the finals before being eliminated.
They'll Return In Fall
Your Graduation
Photograph - •
Have a new picture made with
diploma and flowers immediately after convocation.
Or, from the negatives we already have of you we can make
larger pictures in our exclusive
finish. Come to the Studio and
see samples .
833 Granville St.
proved practically invincible in winning every game. Only 2 tallies were
scored against them while they were
busy getting 21. Two players, Dot
Yelland and Bea Hastings, were chosen on the Mainland Rep Team.
Those men who prefer to play their
hockey on the grass instead of ice
finished fourth in the Mainland
League. Stars of the squad were
Trumpour and Cornish.
Senior B and Intermediate A Men's
Basketball teams were very much
outclassed because of the loss of their
best players to the senior squad. Love,
Lafon, McLellan and Straight were
the only players to show much ability. The Intermediate A team gained
some fame for being victims of another team's scoring record.
The women athletes were outclassed
in both leagues in basketball. Dot
Yelland, Beth Evans, and Margaret
Ralph showed the advantage.
Second Division Rugby had tough
tuck in losing the finals to New Westminster after leading the league for
three months. Many of the players
on this team are capable of playing
1st division.
The Junior Soccer team ployed the
role of a farm team for /the senior
squad. Entered in the 2nd division
G.V.A.A., it managed to balance its
wins and losses.
Graduation Gifts
for The Man who Smokes
With U.B.C. Crest Embroidered
Sigh no more, lady - - your problem is solved. Here's the
perfect graduation gift for the important man ! Fine, soft
antelope, beautifully stitched and finished with crest in
blue and gold  $5.00
Styled for Either Men or Co-eds
Smartly chromlum-plnted, and enamelled in black, white, or green.
Streamlined edges.   Polished iVIonaRrnm QS AA
Shield.    Each    tVtfeUU
Chromium-plated "Fancy" ttA AA
design.    Each «P«t.VV
Ronson "Mastercase"    Ronson "Superpad"
A good-looking chromium-plated
lighter and case e°m-<),n —A
blned. Handosme, useful,\W SI)
Dainty combination compact-
llghtcr-cigarette-case for <■» « *
the   very    modern    girl \ |J
enduring. Each ..'. tpv.uv    graduate. Each
Tobaccos, Main Floor at THE BAY
Henderson and Willoughby, star athletes of the 1934 championship
basketball squad, have definitely decided to resume studies for another year
this fall. Their presence may make the difference between a losing and a
winning squad.
Does a University training enable
a graduate to make his (or her) own
living? Does a student expect someone to come and hand out a living
when he is finished? I am afraid he
must face the fact that there are not
enough jobs. He will very likely have
to create his own and cannot expect
someone else to solve his particular
Thc graduate from school today
finds himself (or herself) pretty much j
in the same position as our grandfathers and great-grandfathers when
they came to pioneer in a new country where old avenues were closed.
The youth of today must pioneer under new conditions. Again new avenues must be found and opened up.
Graduates must not only find jobs
they must make jobs. Pethen has
recently written a book called "New
Careers for Youth." In it he advises
that, as soon as you can you should
decide what you would Ilka to do
most and then concentrate on it.
If it is building things such as boats,
bridges or planes, develop it as a
hobby in your spare time. Build
models and study books on the subject. If you have a gift for salesmanship or finance you can always get a
job on a commission basis. If it is
designing or any of the applied arts
a course in a practical school is most
profitable. The Academy of Useful
Arts, 835 West Pender street, teaches
dressmaking, designing and fifteen
different types of applied art. This
school trains its pupils not only in
the practical side of the work which
they intend to go in for but also how
to make their own jobs, filling a great
need in our country.
Will Rogers said: "One of the
things that is
wrong with the
world today is
that everyone
wants to work for
the other fella
and there are not
enough bosses."
You do not have
to depend on
someone else for
your job. You can make your own.
If you are "style conscious," fond
of designing or sewing a course during the summer months at the Academy of Useful Arts will fit you with
the earning capacity you desire. If
you find that It is not designing in
which you wish to specialize there
are many other fields. The complete
training fits you to earn your living
in fifteen different ways. You are
taught theory and can also hive the
actual trade experience if you wish it.
For the benefit of the U.B.C. students
the Academy of Useful Arts is offering you a special rate of $15 a month.
After completing this course you are
able to design your own wardrobe.
You will bo abl* to have, for the
price of one dress, three different
outfits, designed and fitted for you
personally. Send for a free syllabus
which will tell you how to make your
own job or better still visit our
school at 835 West Pender street.
Valedictory Fee
The valedictory gift of Class '36 will
take the form of a contribution to
the Brock Memorial Building fund.
The fireplace in the central common
room of the new Union Building will
be designated as symbolic of the Valedictory Gift from this year's graduating class.
Members who have not paid their
Valedictory fees may do so at Students' Council offices before May 1.
Cheques payable to "R.V. Maclean in
Trust" may be mailed to the above
The Sweetest
Purdy's Chocolates
in the purple box
• • one dollar a pound
100 Varieties
FREE Deliveries
Phone - -
Seymour 1960
Sold at both stores
67S GranvUle St.
2843 South Granville St.
We Invite you to utilize the
services of thla home lighting
consultant. Her services are
free for the asking to help you
to obtain correct lighting.
B. C. Electric
Home Lighting Department
Seymour 5161
Soccer, Basketball and Football Have
Depressing Year
A combination of weight and speed and experience and
youth brought Varsity this year as sweet a rugby team that
ever sported the blue and gold. The team swept through the
strong Rowers 3-0 for the Miller Cup and downed Stanford
21-6 for the World trophy. Only major upset of a great year was
the loss of the McKechnie Cup series to Victoria Rep.
Outstanding among the hustling forwards are Eddie Maguire, top scoring forward of the league- and big Ed Senkler,
chosen on the squad that played the New Zealanders. And keep
your eye on be-speckled Paddy Colthurst who was rightly moved up at Christmas and should have a big season next year..
Dave Carey easily is the best half back in the city and
the three-quarter line has speed to burn with Mercer, Wilson,
McPhee and Leggatt. Johnny Bird's outstanding play at full back
leaves nothing to be desired.
Captain Dobbie again proved to be the ace of the rugby
coaches hereabouts.
Track's success this year can be accredited to two freshmen who made their name performing on the cinders long before coming to Varsity.
Howie McPhee is undoubtedly one of Canada's ace sprinters and can be relied upon wining any race from 30 to 440 yards
while Alec Lucas, called "the one-man track team" is iust about
that. He is an aqe sprinter, a good broad jumper, clears 6 feet
in the high jump and always places in the shot put or discus.
Other star performers are Paddy Colthurst who surprised everyone by galloping in an easy winner in the mile in Victoria and Walt Stewart and Ronnie Allen, middle-distance men.
In outside competition, the team defeated Victoria
Y.M.CA. and took most of the prizes at the New Westminster
Indoor Meet. Howie McPhee won the senior aggregate at the
latter meet. Percy Williams and Maurice Van Vleit coached.
Out of ten championship basketball players of 1935, all
that returned to uphold the blue and gold in 1936 was "Joe"
Pringle. And although Pringle in conceded to be the best guard
in the city, still, Doc Montgomery found that he was by no means
a basketball team.
Practically all Senior B players were moved up to complete a squad. Frank Turner and Bruce Miller were the best
of these. Alex Lucas proved the best of the others, but needed
more experience for senior play.
The high spot of the team's play came in a win over
V.A.C, but it hardly made up for the fifteen league losses. All
games with American colleges were lost.
On paper, Varsity's venture into American football was
a distinct fiasco. In four games, a total of 228 points were scored
against the Thunderbirds while the Varsity offensive clicked
for a sum total of 0.
However, the players can partly justify their failures.
While Coach Moe should have been drilling plays, het found it
necessary to teach football fundamentals to inexperienced rugby players.
Some promising material was uncovered, especially in
the line. Barney Boe, Al Young, Hampden Price and Bill Hodgson will all go places in Canadian Football next year. The
backfield was weak except for the ball carrying of Frank Hay.
The kicking was attempted by various players who averaged
from 10 to 20 yards forward when they kicked the ball and the
same distance backwards when the ball was blocked.
Like basketball, graduation did not hurt the soccer team,
but crippled it. The whole attacking line, including the ace goal-
getter Paul Kozoolin, had to be replaced.
Fortunately such stalwarts as Bish Thurber, Gerry Sutherland and Dan Quayle remained to keep the team in the first
division. Outstanding juniors who were moved up and will do
better next year are Goddard, Okuda, Chester and Gladstone.
Charlie Hitchins again deserves cridit for a good piece of coaching.
Students may enter at any time
University Students who take
advantage of our Summer Courses
prepare for responsible remunerative positions.
Cor. Granville and Broadway
Bayview 8824


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