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The Ubyssey Oct 16, 1931

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/saiieo* funce Weekly by the Students' Publications Board of The University of British Columbia
VOL.XTV
VANCOUVER, B.C., FRIDAY, OCTOBER 16, 1931
Heads Players Club
Four New Plays
Selected By Club
For Xmas Showing
Following two strenuous days of try-outs successful aspirants
to membership in the Players Club were welcomed by the President at the first general meeting last Friday.
The new honorary president, Dr. Walker, was then formally
introduced and received with enthusiasm by old and new members. He announced that there would be four plays this Christmas, giving ample scope to the talents of the members. The
plays are as follows: ''Vindication" by Leonard J. nines and
Frank King is a tragedy enacted in a single room by the relative of a condemned murderer. This play will be directed by
Sidney Risk, Arts'30.
Tor those who are interested to*1 1  "      <
character interpretation a play called
"The Tender Passion" by Vincent
Dpuglas has been chosen. It is more
on tiie lines of a sketch but contains
all the elements of an interesting per-,
formance, including a park bench, and
a lover's qviarrel. Dr. Carrothers and
Mrs Lavlfrence will direct this play.
The modern day will be represented
In "Part Time Job," a ligTit comedy
by Laura Hornlckel concerohlg the
doings of a young husband, hb> wife
and their friends. AtmospherefW
be the dominant tone of this play
under the joint direction of Mrs. GorA
don Shrum and Miss Jefferd.
A costume play by Henry Hertag
will complete th* performance. It is
called "Hunt the Tiger" and Is a fantastic tragic-comedy of the 18th century in France. In it an imaginative
man eVolves a new scheme which provides an interesting Option for would-
be suicides. Dr. Walker will manage
the production of this play.
Members ere already .reading their
play and will StinH rehearsing within
the next few days, to order to give a
creditable performance about the
fourth week to November. The Thespians were reminded that the way of
the actor Is necessarily rigorous.
Strict co-operation to the matter of
prompt attendance af rehearsals, re-
ijpict for detail, etc., is the life-blood
of the Club.
The Reception wlu bo held on tho
evenings of Oct 11. \ .
|he new members are as foUowsi
Norma Benyas, Nance Carter, AUcla
Earl, Helen Perguson, Helen Harris,
Betty Jack, Dorothy Lees, Janet Mc-
Elhanney, Jacqueline McGregor, Olive
Norgrove, Margaret Palmer, Margaret
Powlett, Beryl Rogers, Jane Stevenson, Margaret Stewart, Frances Tre-
mayne, Eleanor Walker, Art Bagnall,
J. M. Beddall, H. P. Bell-Irving, D.
M Brown, Peers Davidson. Douglas
Gordon, George Hall, Ross Hanbury,
Fred Hobson, Bernlce Jackson, Harold
Lando, Tom Mansfield, D. Martin, C.
R. Mathison, Robert McKeown, J. M.
Millar, Bill Morrow, Art Murdock,
Hugh Palmer, Henry Shaw, Alastar
Taylor, Gordon Thompson, and several technicians yet to be appointed.
ALICE MORROW
Elected to the office of president of
the Players' Club last term, Miss Morrow is this year undertaking the task
of directing the University dramatic
organisation. Tha position Is one of
considerable responsibility owing to
the high etande/cTof production which
has been crafted to tha SbJbJn former years,
Relations Club
Hears Report
Of Delegate
Reports on the International Student Conference which waa held during th« siwmor, and on the Pacific
Area Conference, were read at a
meeting of the International Relations Club on Thursday, October 8.
The first report, which was written
by Mr. James Gibson, former secretary of the club, gave a full account
of the International Conference
which took place at the University
of Michigan.
It was moved that a vote of
thanks be sent to him for his report.
A second report, read by Miss
Hockin, told of the Pacific Area Conference which was held this summer
at Bowen Island.
The business of the meeting included the admission of several new
members to the club.
MINIATURE
MINOTAUR
"Rehearsals for the forthcoming
Thoth Ballet are proceeding apace,"
announces St. John Madeley, Grand
Scribe of the society. The complete
cast has been selected and is being
put through its paces by the production committee.
Costumes for the presentation are
in the hands of Miss M. A. Pilkin-
ton, who handled the former ballet,
"Anthony and Cleopatra," which was
staged two years ago,
This year's ballet takes for its subject the Greek myth of "Theseus and
the Minotaur." The scene will be
outside the labrlnth. As well as the
loading characters, a chorus of human sacrifices will be featured, while
a combat between Theseus and bis
bull-headed opponent will form the
climax of the production.
Letters Club
Hears Paper
OnFairy Tales
"Some night when the sun in darkness dips ,
We'll seek that dreamland olden
And you shall touch with your finger tips
The ivory gates and golden"—so
promised Jean Cameron to the paper
on Fairy Tales which she read at a
meeting of the Letters Club at tlie
home of Dean Bollert, Tuesday evening, October 13.
"Modern civilization and our Puritanic tendencies," she said, "have prevailed to banish most of our actual
beliefs in Fairies and their kin, but
nothing can take from those who
really joy in the "wee folk," the
charm of makebelieve.
Although we no longer regard fairies with superstitious awe we voluntarily suspend our disbelief udd "clap
with sheer delight when called upon
to save Tinkerbell's life."
Story telling is a very ancient art
and the stories told by the savages
differ very little from the more polished products of a sophisticated age.
Fairy tales are an important division
of all folk tales and have been numlod
down by oral as well as toy written
tradition horn age to age.
'The simplest and most workable
classification of fairy tales," said Miss
Cameron, "seems to be to divide them
into sagas and the German Marchen
or nursery tales,"
Before the time of Perrault there
were few printed tales. The earliest
collection, tho Mottl Piacevoli, was
published by Straparola, a native of
Caravaggio, to 1550.
, Straparola's tales oecnme tl*e origin
of the French Cantos des Fees and
furnished the basis of Perrauli's Puss
in Boots and several of Mme. D'Aul-
noy's tales. To Perrault we msy
ascribe the beginning of the Mother
Goose Legend.
In 1833 the Grimm brothers published their first edition of Household
Tales, a collection well known and
loved by every child.
Tales of fairy lore were further
:<*wAe.    -
Norse Tales ^ubbshed by ATbjornsen **?
COMING EVENTS
Todays-
Arts 33, Arts 100, 12:15.
Meeting of Pep Club. Arts 108.
Monday, 18th:—
Arts 34, Arts 100, noon.
Big   Block   Club,   Arts   106,
noon.
Pep    Meeting,     Auditorium,
noon.
Saturday, 17th: Canadian Rugby
Varsity   vs.   Westminster   at
Westminster, 2:30.
Varsity  vs.  Cougars  at  Mc-
Bride, 2:30.
Soccer-
Varsity vs. Southhhl Kerns-
dale, 3:00,
Varsity   Juniors  vs.   Victoria
Road, Varsity Grounds. 3:00
English Rugby—
U.B.C. vs. Ex-Magec, Brockton Pt., 2:15.
Varsity    vs.    Rowing    Club,
Brockton Point, 3:30.
Varsity   2   vs.   King   George,
Heather Park, 2:45.
Vnrsity 3 vs. North Vancouver, Douglas Park, 3:30.
FASHION PARADE
MODELS CHOSEN;
MANY COMPETE
Co-ed mannequins will parade en
the evening of the 23rd and the after-
of the 34th of October, under the tus-
pices of the Hudson's Bay Company.
Tickets for this W.U.S, Fashion Show
may be purchased from members of
the executive or the models for
seventy-five cents.
These models were chosen after
careful consideration, from three hundred girls. So much competition permitted those in charge to chooso only
those who are most suited to the
work. The following were finally
selected:
Dorothy Thompson, Dorothy Walk-
vr, Dorothy Colledge, Hilda Wood,
Jean Bogardus, Marion MacDonald,
Mary Thompson, Kathleen Bingay,
Betty Creighton, Alice Morrow, Josephine Hennlng, and Gretchen Vrooman. Those on the executive of the
W.U.S. from whom tickets may be
bought are: Dorothy Myers, Pat Harvey, Esme Thompson, Betty Jack,
Mary Matheson, Nancy Carter, and
Ethel Elliott.
This year the tickets for the evening
performance are the same price a3
those for the afternoon, seventy-five
cents. The model will protray the latest fashions in smart sport wear, fluttering afternoon gowns, and graceful
evening dresses. Soft music will be
played while the mannequins display
their lovely ensemble. Tea will be
served after the performance.
Special mention should be made of
the work of Dorothy Myers, who is
devoting time and energy toward
making the affair an even greater
success than last year. Naturally thc
show calls for much practice on the
part of the models; the executive,
too, are exerting themselves to swell
the Women's Union Building Fund.
Women of the University should show
their appreciation of these efforts by
turning out in full force to the performances. As there are two displays
there is no excuse for not attending.
and Moe to 1858 and translated by
George Webb Dasent to 1874 as Tales
From the Old Norse and Tales From
the Fjeld.
Jacob's English, Celtic and European Folk tales must not be, forgotten.
"Among Japanese fairy tales," said
Miss Cameron, "there are some of unusual beauty and suggestiveness,
which reflect the characteristic love
of the Orient for everything exquisite and perfect both in harmony and
detail."
Ireland too has been the birth place
of countless original fairy tales. Modern Irish poetry presents the Irish tradition in a simple and graceful form.
"Come away, O human child
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand
For the world's more fun of weep'
ing than you can understand.'1
So sings William Butler Yeats.
"Hans Anderson was a genius of
modern fairy literature. In literary
form of the greatest simplicity he presents the whole tapestry of life, and
without suggesting a moral, tells all
he has experienced in life to simple
concrete imagery that a child can appreciate."
"In Lewis Carroll's Alice in Wonderland are grave nonsense, absurd
puns, mock logic and cheerfully fantastic happenings which make it a
classic among moderns."
Tho desire for simplicity to an advancing and changing civilization has
called forth many modern "fantastic"
tales ranging from the delightful nonsense of Alice in Wonderland to the
profound seriousness of The King of
the Golden River.
"The idea of fairy folk with dresses
of rose petals, golden tresses and
starred wands is one of comparatively
modern origin deduced by a people
no longer fearful of the fairies."
Chaucer speaks of a "land fulfilled
of faerie." Spenser elaborated fairy
ideas and subsequent poets added to
the tradition. "The mythology of the,
people as presented in Shakespeare
reveals the mischievous Puck at work
teasing the dairy maids and hopping
In the old gammer's bowl in likeness
of a roasted crab." The poet has not
moulded this conception to suit himself—he has clung to the traditions of
$he common people.
IN MEMORIAM
Horace McEwen, a student in
his final year to Mining Engineering at this University,
died Saturday after being taken'
suddenly ill early in the term,
Mr. McEwen, who was 35
years old when he died, was a
war veteran, having been to
action for two years to France
in the Army Service Corps,
C.E.F. He was transferred to
the Royal Air Force after be
had been wounded, and spent
the latter part of tiie war with
the R.A.F. to Egypt.
He was a member of Science
'32, department of mining engineering at the U.B.C. and this
spring was awarded the Captain
Le Roy Memorial Scholarship,
which is awarded annually to
th'e war veteran at this university who shows the most outstanding progress to scholastic
achievement.
Mr. McEwen leaves his
mother, Mrs. F. E. McEwen, his
wife and their two-year-old
daughter.
Outdoors  Club
Scales Peaks
On Trip
•____—■_«
By Michael Freeman
Ten members of the Varsity Outdoors Club assailed and conquered
Sky Pilot and the Ledge at the
top of Britannia Valley, Howe Sound,
during the Thanksgiving week-end,
October 10-12.
Taking the Union Steamship "Cynthia," on Saturday morning the hikers reached Britannia Beach shortly
after midday. Here the skip was
taken up an incline which rises 1800
feet In half a mile, to the terminus
of the elertrlc railway. The. skip consists of a flat car on rails which Is
raised up the hill by means of a steel
table, tne electric railway winds its
way up the valley for three oi four
Townslte,
It
the U.
trail. CM
hour ahd
e the upper town that
hikers first took to the
tog up the valley for an
half they finally reached
Utopia Lake, the upper reservoir for
the water supply for Britannia mine.
Here camp was pitched for the night
and most of the party slept out in the
open in their sleeping bags.
After a sumptuous breakfast the
mountain climbers commenced the
day's hike. Ufopia Lake lies in a basin at the top end of Britannia Valley,
surrounded on three sides by mountain ridges, which rise abruptly for a
thousand feet or more. The peak of
Sky Pilot could be seen from the
lake, rising behind and above the
north ridge of ,the valley,
After an hour's steep and heavy
climbing the hikers reached open
country on the top ot the latter ridge.
To ascend Sky Pilot, it was necessary for the parjy of climbers to cross
the South face Of the peak at the bottom of the cliffs. This was accomplished by following short ledges
which gradually* rose to the East side.
Roundirig the South East shoulder,
the hikers had a marvellous view of
Garibaldi Mountain fifteen or twenty
miles due. North. Twenty minutes
later, after climbing over a series of
step-like formations' on the Bast face,
the Varsity hikers gained the summit
of the peak.
Lunch was eaten by the Party at the
bottom of Sky Pilot. Crossing a broad
shingle chute the refreshed hikers
soon reached the base ot the Ledge.
To climb this peak first a long rork
slide had to be ascended which lead
around to the East face. This connected with a narrow ledge that rose
diagnally across the South cliff to
within a hundred feet of the summit.
The rest of the ascent consisted of a
fairly steep incline, which was strewn
(Please turn to Page Two)
Musical Society
Will Produce
Sophomore Officers
Are Filled
Milton Owen was elected new
President of Arts '34 by an overwhelming majority at the class meeting held Wednesday In Arts 100.
Nancy Carter was returned as Vice-
President.
Five Year Plan
Starting Point
Says Prof. Day
"The Russian Five Year Plan Is not
an end in itself, but rather a jumping
off point for further planning and development" was the gist of an address
given by Professor J. Friend Day on
"The Economic effects of the success
of tiie Russian Five Year Plan on
Canada and the United States" before
the Association of Professional Engineers.
In tackling a subject of this kind
Professor Day stressed the Importance
of the history of .Russia prior to the
formulation of this gigantic scheme.
He said that Russia was a vast area,
similar in many respects, in elimnte,
geographical relation to the markets
of the world, and produce, to the continent of North America taken as a
whole. The westernization of this almost Immeasurable area had been
deliberately held .back by the policy
of the Czars, because they believed in
the possibility of the development of
a distinctive Slavic civilization. He
also stressed the fact that after the
war, Russia had to build Up her economic structure from virtual ruin,
while she could not obtain credit
abroad; she was trying to build up,
under a condition of economic blockade, a trade machine suitable for competition in International trade.
In 1921, Lenin, one of the greatest
men of modern times, established a
new economic order: that is, he abolished private property rights, and
made trading a governmental monopoly, said Prof, Day. Lento, however,
saw the folly of a rigid enforcement
of this policy, and allowed trading for
profit within the boundaries of the
country, and recognized the rights of
private property to fact, If not to
theory. The effects of allowing internal trade to be carried on with the
object of obtaining profit, were very
gratifying, but it was soon realized
that these traders were getting too
much power, and so a policy of liquidation Waa Inaugurated. "It la rather
interesting to note that In Russia the
word ^liquidation' has a peculiar
meaning—there it means 'to take
away all a man's goods and then put
him up against a wall and shoot him
if it is considered necessary," he said.
Their program included mining.for-
estry, electrical engineering, industry
general, and agriculture. Their difficulties were the Slavic attitude to
labor, the innate dreaminess of the
Slavic outlook, and tne tremendous
will power necessary for a practical
(Please turn to Page Two)
n
Resigned
Debates Union
Nomenclature
Is Changed
A meeting of all those Interested
in public speaking and debating was
held during the noon hour on October 8 In Arts 104. Mr. Milton Owen
was chosen as temporary chairman
of the meeting and Mr. Prank Christian as secretary.
The purpose of the meeting was to
dissolve the former Debating Union
and to replace it with the University
Parliamentary Forum. It was moved
by Mr. Semple and seconded by Mr.
Ladner that a letter be sent to the
President of the L. S. E. from this
meeting requesting that the Debating
Union be dissolved and be replaced
by the University Parliamentary
Forum, the executive of which Is
yet to be chosen. The motion carried.
It was further decided that a temporary committee be appointed to arrange for the first official meeting of
the Parliamentary Forum. On this
committee of five members are: Miss
Walker, Mr. Beckett, Mr. Christian,
Mr. MacDougall and Mr. Lando. A
permanent executive will be chosen
at the first meeting of the Forum.
Cleveland Resigns
As Junior Member
OnReturn to U.B.C.
Terminating his brief career as Junior Member, Howard
Cleveland resigned at a meeting of Students' Council on
Wednesday, 14th. At the same meeting it was decided that
Arts must pay for the consequences of the recent Arts-Science
rio't, being the attacking faculty. The requests of the Tennis
Club and the Big Block Club for permission to hold dances this
term was refused.
A grant of $6.00 was made to the Agriculture Club for tha
Jmrpose of sending two teams of three, men each on a dairy-
udging contest down the Pacif c Coast.
» Discussion arose as to whether this
was strictly a student function, since
the work was more or less eurrlcular.
It was concluded that these teams
were, to be considered on the same
tooting as debating teams. In the past'
they have done well—winning first
prize four years ago and also in last
year's contest,
A prolonged discussion was held on
the subject of fixing a date for tha
Arts Ball, opinion being divided on
the question as to whether Friday or
Saturday is the more suitable night
for this function. No final decision
was reached. The matter will be put
before the Alma Mater Society at a
forthcoming meeting. .v
An application from the Ex-Varsity
English Rugby team to use the Gym
for practices was favorably received.
The field south of the Soccer field
was allotted to the Grass Hookey
Club, and will hereafter be' known as
the hockey field. Expenses for necessary equipment for this club were approved of.
Continuing to stand by its policy
of cutting down on social functions,
Council refused to grant permission
to the Tennis Club to hold a dance,
which In the past used to be an annual affair. The same treatment was
accorded the Basketball league, as
well as the Big Block Club. It was
maintained, that tha Fall term is far
too full already, and that mora functions are very' unadvlsable at this
time.
The resignation of gftwlt
from the position el
was accepted. !§#*<
"I would like to take the O]
to extend to the Students' Council
and to the Alma Mater Society my
sincere regrets that I am unable to
continue to office.
"I would like to explain," he added,
"that I was unavoidably late to my
arrival at university, and it would be
impossible to do justice to my office
or my studies in remaining Junior
Member."
A grant for expenses in connection
with the Danish Gymnastic Display
on October 28th in the Varsity Gymnasium was made. This affair is being
sponsored by the Men's and Women's.
Gym Clubs.
HOWARD CLEVELAND
Owing to pressure of work arising
partly from his late return to college,
Cleveland has been compelled to resign from the position of Junior Member to which he was elected last
spring.
Senior Class
To Visit Grave
OfDr.Wesbrook
Graduating classes will observe an
annual custom  when they  visit the
grave of Dr. Wesbrook, first president
of the University of British Columbia,
The secretary's office has 1 on Tuesday, October 20th.
not yet been filled. j    This ceremony was started by the
The meeting was opened by the re- j class of Arts '25 in honor of the work
} tiring president, Douglas Brown, who, accomplished by Dr. Wesbrook during
H   M. S. Pinafore called on the three candidates for the, bis term of office. This work Included
* ! presidency,   Telford,   Whitelaw,    and i strenuous efforts to have the Univer-
Owen. to address the class and out- j sity moved from its temporary quar-
Une their election policies. No plat-.ters in Fairview to its present site.
form beyond the general good of thel ™» year the visit to the cemetery
class was advanced by Telford or | wil take place at noon on Tuesday
Owen. Whitelaw suggested that a I October 20th. Seniors will proceed
fund be started now, stretching over I b* c".to Mountain View Cemetery
..    l. 4   _ j.. *•       i where they will place a wreath on the
the three years to graduation, to cov-1      „     ...      , . .     .,    ,
,     » / .04 it i j, * **4 4   4,   'grave.   It is customary for the honor -
er the Arts '34 Valedictory gift to the
The Musical Society will produce
another Gilbert and Sullivan opera,
H.M.S. Pinafore, this year. This was
definitely decided at a*n executive
meeting of the Club held in Auditorium 207 at 3 p.m. Wednesday.
Work is being commenced on the
Opera at once. Scores have been sent
for and the first rehearsal is set for
next Wednesday.
The Society will give its first noon
hour recital of the .year on Thursday,
October 22. The chorus will render
selections and members of the A.M.S,
will also contribute.
:. ,       .        , "."« ,.   4        «ry president of the graduating class
University.   It was suggested that no tQ glvu a short addreas at ^ graye
more stone seats be presented to the    ide    This duty wU1 {flU to fhe lot of
Library. 'Professor Angus this year, aspresi-
Nancy Carter, Betty Newson, and dent of Arts -32, The wreath to be
Beryl Rogers were nominated as vice- placed on the grave will be exhibited
president. Nancy Carter was re- in the hallway of the library during
turned. I the morning of the 20th.
GYM. CLUBS
TO SPONSOR
BtCWfrtAt
The celebrated Danish Gymnasts,
under the leadership of Professor
Bukh are staging a display to the
Varsity gym., the evening of October 28.
This, presentation is part of a world
tour, the participants coming to Vancouver from Japan and then proceeding eastward through Canada and
the United States.
Professor Bukh who is principal of
the Gymnastic Peoples' College, 01-
lerup, Denmarl, was a sailor, a soldier, and a farmer, before he made
gymnastic science and training his
profession. He has conducted'gymnastic exhibitions to numerous countries during the last twenty years.
Danish gymnastic teams under his
direction have competed successfully
at several Olympic Games.
The team with him in the tour that
he Is at present conducting is composed of twelve girls and thirteen
young men, high school students
from Denmark.
The program consists of fundamental gymnastics, agility exercises,
jumping, singing games, and folk
dances in. national costume.
An exhibition of this kind has nev
er before been staged here and it is
hoped that the students ej}d faculty
will make It a success by patronizing
it.
Tickets are selling for 33c to Varsity students, 50c to the general public, and reserved seats may be had
for 11.00. They can be procured from
any member of the Men's and Women's Athletic Executive.
WHAT ZILCH
HATH DONE-
ZILCH CAN DO
"The verse is harder than the chorus, but then, the chorus is easier than
the verse," Harold King explained to
a throng of students when he introduced bis new song at the Canadian Rugby pep meeting last Friday.
The song writer and his orchestra
provided most of the entertainment
at the noon-hour gathering. One
skit was staged.
To get things going, the sweatshirt musicians took a deep breath
and waded through "Nobody's Sweetheart Now." Their efforts received
an encouraging amount  of applause
Shakespearian
Scenes at K.H.S.
Prove Popular
Presenting a series of scenes from
Shakespeare, a group of English actors
entertained under the auspices'of tha
L.S.E. at Kitsilano High School Auditorium Tuesday night.
The company, composed of Leslie
Manners, Jessica Dale-Lee, Marjorie
Hansen (pianist) and Maureen Grute
(dancer), showed remarkable versatility, all the Shakespearean roles being
taken by the first two.
The Morocco Casket scene from 'The
Merchant of Venice,' a scene from
Hamlet combining three of the great
soliloquies with Hamlet's reviling of
his mother, Antony's oration over the
body of Caesar, Shylock and Portia
in the Trial Scene, the encounter of
Jacques and Rosalind in 'As You Like
It,' and excerpts „ from 'The Taming
of the Shrew' were the parts selected.
Leslie Manners was at his best as
Petruchio in 'As You Like It,' His
Shylock was also an excellent portrayal, and his Mark Antony was very
well done. As Hamlet he gave a good
interpretation, though in appearance
he fell short of the ideal.
Jessica Dale-Lee proved somewhat
'stagey' as Portia in the Casket Scene,
but very capable in the Trial Scene.
She carried her other roles well, especially in 'The Taming of the Shrew.'
Between scenes she sang 'Sigh No
More, Ladies,' 'Mistress Mine, Where
Are You Roaming,' and 'When That
I Was a Little Tiny Boy,'
Maureen Grute gave two dances,
'Roman Dance' and 'Humming Bird.'
The latter was executed with the
more grace and poise.
-». „„«, u.^., 0rtoch tincnrr^ios:'rr
paper
The students, however, were waiting for "Hail, U. B. C." and not until
It was played did they unleash their
enthusiasm. The words of the song
had been printed and distributed
through the audience and the students were given their first
tunity of singing it.
A Players' Club tryout was presented to pass the time and Mamie
Zilch, ns Lady Sizzle, succeeded in
making the grade along with her
partner, Himie Zilch.
oppor-
pany depending on the excellence of
its elocution for effect. r, q
Nominations for the position
of Junior Member must be in
the hands of the Secretary by
5 o'clock Monday. Thc nominees must be third year students. The nomination must be
signed by ten members of the
Alma Mater Society. No freshmen may vote. ■A. *
Page Two
THE    UBYSSEY
Friday, October 16, 1931
Shr Ibparg
(Member of Pacific Inter-Collegiate Press Association)
Issued every Tuesday and Friday by the Student
Publication Board of the University of British Columbia,
West Point Grey.
PHONE PT. GREY 128
Mail Subscription rate: $3 per year
Advertising rates on application.
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF-Wilfred Lee
SENIOR EDITORS
Tuesday Issue: Mairi Dingwall
Friday Issue: Frances Lucas
Sport Editor: E. King. Feature Editor: E. J. Costain
Associate Editors: Mollle Jordan, Rosemary Winslow
Literary Editor; Michael Freeman
Exchange Editor: Nathan Nemetz
Columnist: R. Grantham
News Manager: St. John Madeley
Assistant Editors: Tom Howe, Norman Hacking
Sidney Aqua.
Reportorial Staff: Pat Kerr, Arnold White, Bill Cameron,
Day Washington, Ted Denne, Stew Keate, Kay
Crosby, Milton Share, Betty Gourre, Kim Killam.
Celia Lucas, Margaret Little, Laurel Rountree.
Business Assistants: Guy Palmer, Dave King, Murray
Miller, Nathan Nemetz, Brodie Gillies, Phil Parker.
Business Manager, Reg. Price
FRIDAY, OCTOBER 16, 1931
The Literary Supplement
_____ •
"Whenever the Muse visits the University"
—then and then only can the sorely harassed
literary editor produce a Literary Supplement
to the Ubyssey. But the Muse will not come
uninvited; *he must be invoked and that by
mora than a single person. We have been informed on good authority that it requires but
the invitation to bring this honored guest
* among us in the near future. In other words,
* Literary Supplement will appear within the
next few weeks provided that enough suitable
material is forthcoming.
One of the functions of tha Ubyssey, at outlined in tha Publications Board Constitution,
is to provide students with a medium of expression. Tha regular departments of tha paper
are always open to contributions from the student body. The correspondence exists in order
~_,the.t itudanta may have an opportunity to express their thoughts. For those who desire a
mora literary medium of expression, the Literary Suplement is published twice annually.
There is no reason to suppose that there is less
talent talent in the University at present than
• there has been in previous years and we trust
that the next few weeks will bring forth a
wealth of contributions from which the literary editor may select material for a creditable
supplement.
«*_S-s_e_-MsaBM_a-__a_M__a_-_M_«-«a--e
The S.S.S.A.
4 . msmsmtmsmm
Comparatively few people realise the part
Which the Summer session students play in the
. (corporate life of the University. Banded together as tha Summer Session Students' Association these man and women can in no way
be classed as a liability to the University. An
academic record of far better average than that
shown on tiie records of the winter session
testifies to the type of men and women who
will spend their vacation at this institution.
As concrete evidence of their desire to help
in solving the many problems which confront
the University, the students of the 12th Summer Session, recently concluded, provided the
funds for one of the new tennis courts which
made its appearance during the long vacation.
This is the first time that the S.S.S.A. has
found it possible to make a gift to the University, but we are told that the association is even
"'" now considering a present to be made at its
13th session and expects to make the donation
an annual event.
A closer contact between students of the
two sessions is sought by the S.S.S.A. and at
its annual banquet representatives of the
A.M.S. and the Alumni have been honoured
guests for the past two years. We believe that
such.contact would be of material benefit to
the University as a whole and we hope that regular students will not be backward in doing
anything which may bring into closer union
the students of the two sessions.
"We Want Moosic"
M
And we've got it!
At the first Pep Meeting of the session, on
Friday last, a real Varsity song was put across
with a bang by its author and his whoopee-
making band.
The Varsity's last effort in the way of Pep
Meeting rallyingvcries was a rather puerile plagiarism of a movie theme-song—and was duly
received with a coldness which really did
credit to the much-questioned culture of the
student body.
A moment's perusal of the back pages of
the Student Handbook will show that there is
a dearth of good songs from any source—our
supply, as compared with the copious compilation of the Toronto Varsity Song-Book, being
pitifully small. Of locally written lays there
are almost no popular examples,—"Alma
Mater" being classed in a somewhat different
category.
"Hail, U. B. C." shows signs of gaining instantaneous and ample popularity. Varsity
needs a good song badly, and Harold King has
adequately supplied the want.
Although it has one of the smallest of all
standing armies among the great nations of
the world, the United States last year spent
more than any other nation on armaments.
Other nations spent for arms in the order: Soviet Union, France, Great Britain, Italy Japan,
India, Germany, Spain
l|i :|( ij!
One of a group of five famous portraits on
exhibition at the Metropolitan Museum is one
by Samuel Morse, inventor of the telegraph,
who was an artist before he took up invention. I
In the last 'Pipe and Pen' I credited the
Hamlet slang translation the 'The Oregonian,
University of Oregon,' instead of to 'The Oregonian, Portland, Oregon.'
Recapitulation I hereby disown the four
quippish comments embodied
in the last 'Pipe and Pen.' There should have
been a double line above them to indicate that
the responsibility was not mine.
* *   *
A news report unjournalistically records
that the Council received ' a very amusing
letter' from the Big Brother and Big Sister
,    Movement Incorporated, ask-
Let's Be ing U. B. C. to refrain from
Big-Hearted using the term 'Big Sister' in
campus life. Whether this
Movement has a legal right to the exclusive
use of the term is doubtful, but—oh- well, let
them have it, let them have it!  As a substitute
we might adopt something dignified.
.'!•♦♦
By this time everyone should know who
Charlie Crane is and, since his picture appeared in the last issue, what he looks like. It
was stated in the article that accom-
Crane panied the picture that he has been
Again handicapped since he was six years
old.   This, it is important to know,
should have read 'nine months old.'
*'   e   ♦
Yes-They-Think-So state in the last issue
that misprints appear to be distributed
throughout the paper with marked impartiality
and certainly they cannot
There's Many complain of being neglected.
A Slip At any rate, it is always provo
cative to wonder what interesting word variations will be introduced into
one's copy. Recently I read in an American
university paper that Zane Grey had gone into
the wilds of somewhere-or-other to get the
background for a naw novel—only another
vowel was substituted for the 'o' in 'novel.'
There's many a slip 'twixt the pen and the
printed product.
. As for 'wooks,' if I could believe that even'
a few students delved into Chaucer to discover
its meaning, I would deliberately encourage
such philological zeal by using other strange
but stimulating words, such as 'ploughing4*
which I noted in the last issue. Probably, however, the editors would carefully substitute
common forms for, any such words that were
used intentionally.
* *   *
Yes-They-Think-So have heartened me
greatly by hoisting the co-op standard, too.
They wonder whether I would go sq far as to
condemn competition in debating.
Fellow The answer is in the negative; foren-
Co-ops sic contests, like games, are essentially co-operative. The purpose of
athletics is to provide exercise and develop
sportsmanship. Victory and defeat are incidental. Those who make them primary considerations adopt a distorted point of view—
the 'cut-throat competition' attitude. Similarly
in debating
I think that the Yes-They-Think-So gentlemen would support me in the opinion that
competition is only desirable when it serves
the ends of society as a whole—when it is constructive in nature, when it stimulates cooperation, when it is not productive of material
or mental harm.
*   *   *
On Tuesday night an audience of unimpressive size, including some students, witnessed
the presentation of scenes from Shakespeare
at Kitsilano High School Auditorium,
The under the auspices of the L. S. E.
L. S. E. I did not expect great art, nor uid
I witness it; but it was a most enjoyable evening. Of the small English company,
two actors took all the Shakespearean roles.
Leslie Manners as Hamlet, Shylock, Mark Antony and Petruchio was particularly interesting, and played the parts well. In some of the
exclamations and remarks he dropped into ordinary, conversational tones; otherwise the
usual declamatory style prevailed.
These intentional lapses seemed to me effective, and I wondered if declamation could be
dispensed with almost entirely in Shakespeare.
Some of the plays have been 'modernized,' I
know, as regards fashions and probably in delivery as well. I do not think that I would like
the plays in modern costume, but less declamation might be an improvement. Possibly the
Players' Club will try a Shakespearean experiment sometime.
L. S. E. affairs often suffer from lack of
patronage. A mere handful, for instance, heard
the fiery Porto Rican debaters last year. Admission to such events is low, and many think
nothing of spending twice as much, and more,
on talkies, dances and games. Is it possible
that most students are too stupid to have voluntary intellectual, cultural and educational
interests?
When the L. S. E. sponsors an entertainment, it deserves support. Lack of that support indicates a sad state of affairs and shows
that students are not taking proper advantage
of the privileges and opportunities provided by
university life. Lack of that support, indeed,
has implications so serious that the Council
and other executives should feel bound io
grapple with the situation in a vigorous and
constructive way. However, it is as yet too
early in the year to be unduly pessimistic in
this regard.
In     —m i n     ii     wi    ii          m     «i     ii    mil   n     m   m i   n i   h—.._ m_.m_i
CLASS AND CLUB NOTES
r — ti     si      ai      n      n     ti     ii      ri   i  si   in irn—in      is     si         n -*■«__>•*___n
LE CERCLE "ALOUETTE"
"Alouette" held its opening meeting
on Tuesday afternoon at Anne's Tea
House. A program of French songs,
afternoon tea with French conversation and a business meeting conducted in French proved both interesting and profitable.
"L'Alouette" will meet Tuesday,
October 20 at the home of Miss Ruth
Helghton, 1132 Salisbury Drive. Take
the No. A car to Napier Street and
Commercial Drive,
east and kalf a block south
ARTS '33
• Election of President, Treasurer,
and Men's Athletic Rep, will take
place at the meeting of'Arts '33 to
be held In Arts 100 at 12:15 today.
All* members please turn out.
INTERNATIONAL RELATIONS
CLUB
There are several vacancies In the
club at present. All students who
have passed their Freshman year and
who show their Interest by attending
two consecutive meetings are eligible. Address all communication to J.
Sumner or W. Roper.
CLASSICS CLUB
The opening meeting of the Classics
Club was held at the home of Mr.
Todd, on Wednesday, October 7. Fol-
lowing tha president's welcome to the
visitors and new members, Min Auk)
gave an interesting address on "Greek
Architecture," illustrating her subject
with slides and posters. The singing
of a popular song in Latin was an
innovation of the evening which, It
is hoped, will be continued at future
meetings. After the serving of refreshments a vote of thanks was
moved to Dr. and .Mrs. Todd, and the
meeting adjourned.
Members of the Aggie' Faculty who
have a good opinion of their ability
between handles of a plough should
get in touch with Dick Locke and get
their names down for the first ploughing match that has ever been held on
the campus. The match will take
place on Wed,, .October 21st. There
will be both Individual and class com-
petition and prizes wil be given the
victors In each class.
S. C. M.
The S.C.M. started its activities last
week with a successful welcome for
freshettes at the home of Mrs. A.
Oibb. After a welcome to the women
by Vice-President Mary Sadler, Dean
Bollert gave an address, stressing the
increasing need for some spiritual
life on the campus. Katharine Hochin,
NOTICE ARTS '32
We still need a few more cars for
Walk one block transportation to the Wesbrook Ceremony on Tuesday, October 20 at
noon. Any students who can assist
us by supplying a car on this date
please notify C, Cooke by Letter rack
as soon as possible.
NOTICE
Cheques for the Provincial
Government Bursaries have arrived at the Bursar's office.
Students entitled to this money
should call at the Bursar's office without delay.
PHYSICS CLUB
A meeting of the Physics Club will
be held in Science 200 at 3 o'clock!
next Wednesday. Mr. JLyle Stewart
will speak on the Eastman Kodak,
the Technicolor, and the Dufay and
Martinez process of color photography.
NOTIC
Will the three members of the Lit
erary Forum who sent their resignations to Kay Crosby please hand
their names to the secretary-treasurer, Lilian Youds, as soon as possible.
ED. NOTE
If "a left-over myself' will kindly
furnish us with his name *t a guarantee of good faith we shall bo glad
to publish his letter. The name will
not be published and will be kept
confidential.
LITERARY FORUM
"Alice Freeman Palmer" is the subject chosen by Miss Jean Campbell
for her address to the Literary Forum on Tuesday noon in Arts 105.
This Is the first of the series of the
lives of v Great Women to be studied
by the Forum. Members are asked
to be prompt at this meeting as, there
is some business to be discussed before the address.
PRE-MEDS.
The University Health Service has
prepared a very useful bulletin on
"So-called Athlete's Foot," which
should be of interest to pre-medlcal
students: They and others Interested, can secure copies at the Health
Service, Auditorium Bidding.
PEP CLUB
Ken Stewart, enthusiastic yell leader Is organizing a yell club. Gordon
Hilker is the secretary and his objective Is to hive about SO men in
his He-man's club to put oh yells
and shows similar to the Universities
across the line. <     <* ■   *
There Is a chance here for students
FOREST CLUB MEETING   _
A business meeting of the Forest "ho are not In any organization or
Club will be held in Room 235 Ap- dub to take part in an activity where
plied Science Building at 12:15 noon there is a chance for fun and enjoy
on Tuesday, October 20th
AM interested are cordially invited
to attend.
V. c. u.
W. F, Baker's address to the V.C.U.
on Wednesday noon tpok the form of
an encouraging and helpful testimonial. He stressed the fact ot the importance for the younger generation
to have an absolute and wholehearted faith in Ood and in our Saviour, Jesus Christ.
He said, "Nothing brings so much in
the way of blessing than the unqualified faith in God." He based his most
interesting message on incidents from
the life of the Apostle Paul and
touched on several from his own experience. He went on to show that
if we committ our lives to God's care
He in return fills us with His spirit
and makes our lives radiant.
Next Wednesday, Oct. 21, Rev. J.
E, Harris will address an open meeting in Aggie 100 at 12:00 noon. Rev
Harris is a graduate ot Edmonton
University and has been heard several times in addresses on the campus.
All interested are cordially invited to
take advantage of this opportunity.
Also, a paper will be given by one
.of the members in Arts 204 on Friday
noon at 12:05.
ment, and there is no fee
A meeting will be held in Arts 108
at Friday noon and those unable to
attend this meeting are invited by
the executive to come to the same
place on Monday.
Send
Photographs
This
Christmas
Bridgman's
Studio of Photography
log*" BMf. lirbtr Ship
The   finest   in   Canada-.ll   chairs.
Special attention to Varsity students.
Ladles Beauty Parlor
4t| Granville Street
Phone: Seymour IBB
BIRKS
CANADA'S NATIONAL
JBWBitiLiBiRS
CANADA'S NATIONAL
JEWELLERS
BIRKS
FIVE YEAR PLAN
STARTING POINT,
SAYS PROF. DAY
(Continued from Page One)
starving of the people In order to accomplish their alms.
Professor Day expressed his great
diffidence in assuming the prophetic
mantle, for he was laying himself
open to criticism at a future date in
case his forecastings failed to materialise.
In 1925, stated Mr, Day, Stalin attacked Lenin's new economic policy,
and attempted to get rid of the traders
by two methods: the first was exceedingly heavy taxation, and the second,
more effective still, banishment.
The actual commencement of the
gargantuan plan for the rehabilitation
of this vast country was in October,
1927. Its objects are the industrialization of Russia, and the complete
liquidation of profiteers. This was
Lenin's idea. The task the Russians
set for themselves was the re-creation
of capital resources out of the forces
of labor and raw material—it amounted virtually to an imposition of wartime conditions on the masses. Consumption goods were, practically
speaking, rationed, and the energy of
tho country was turned with all possible force upon the output of production goods, that is, factories, machinery, etc. The original figures,
which have been revised from time to
time, for obtaining their objective
were as follows: first year, an increase
of 16.7'd', second year,' 13.1^, third
year 13.8%, fourth year 10.5% and in
the final year the percentage increase
was to be the same.
BIG BLOCK CLUB
The Big Block Club will hold a
meeting on Monday noon, October 19
In Arts 100. All members are urged
to attend.
        »
ARTS '32 TAKE NOTICE
Class fees are now due. Payable
to the treasurer, Ralph Fletcher, or
at the table In the Arts building near
the men's common room. The yearly
fee is ten dollars but payment may
be made in two installments of five
dollars for each term. Please pay
these as soon as possible; the money
is needed for the class party which
has been set for Monday, November
2nd. The party will be held at the
Peter Pan ballroom, corner of Broad-
way and Fir, from 9 to 12 p.m. It will
take the form of a gangster dance so
be prepared to look "Caponlsh." Let's
have some co-operation and get all
the collecting done before the dance.
By the way, we nearly forgot the
most interesting part of the proceedings: THE DRAW. This Important
event is slated for Tuesday, Oct. 27,
at 12 noon sharp. Who knows? Kismet.
LOST AND FOUND
Will anybody finding an economics book   (Deibler)   without a name
In It please turn It In to Milton Share
at the Publications office.   '
WANT ADS
BOARD AND ROOM
NICE WARM HOME WITH WIDOW
for one or two girl students. Twin
bed. Pleasant location. Close to car
and bus. 4039 West 11th. Point Grey
683 L
'    DANCING
LtSSONI
Special for U.B.C. Students
Teacher—Mrs. M. Lester
Place—Lester Court,
1022 Davie St.
Fees—$2.50 for 10 lessons
Full course in ballroom dancing
Classes commence Fri., Oct. IS,
at 1 p.m.
SORORITY   OR   CLUBMAN   RENT
desirable room weekly. Elliott 1619 R
LOST—a gold Wahl Eversharp pencil. Will the finder please communicate with the Ubyssey office or Doug.
Perkins.
LOST-ESSAY MANUSCRIPT IN
black-covered scribbler. Finder please
return to Bookstore. Alice Baker.
OUTDOOR CLUB SCALES
PEAKS ON TRIP
(Continued from Page One)
with large boulders, between which*
were mats of dwarf Juniper trees. The
climb along the lelge was made with
very little difficulty, despite the presence of such precipitous surroundings.
Tho return to Utopia Lake was
made without any difficulty, Fine
weather prevailed throughout the day.
On Monday morning the U.B.C,
hikers returned to Britannia Beach.
Whilst waiting for the bo&t, the party-
was taken through the concentrator
by Ken Dobson, U.B.C. graduate.
>«»4i«»<i4H»ii^»<i«»i>«»«'-tflfti>4a»<i«Hfr(i«_>«afr<i«
DURBAR HEIGHTS
TAXI
10th and Sasamat
Phones: DAY, ELL. 1551
NIGHT, BAY. 8359
FOR RENT
BRIGHT, QUIET BEDROOM, STUDY.
4241 W. 10th Ave.
BRIGHT, DOUBLE OR SINGLE
rooms for 4 or 5 students. Excellent
table. No children. A real home,
half a block from University gates.
Moderate rates. 4020 U. 10th Ave.
Portable Typewriter!
AND
REBUILT MACHINES
ALSO
RENTALS
Special Student Rates
ERNIE COSTAIN
Student Representative
For
Imperial Typewriter!
550 Seymour Street
10 per cent of fall
Goods, Including
specialty to
UA.c.Studentt
During the next month, up to
November 15th, any student of
the University of British Columbia can obtain a reduction
of 10% off his bill on any purchase. This includes specials.
He can get this reduction by
6roving that he is a student.
lis university pin, Bus penult,
a. library identification card, anv-
■ thing at all that proves that the
bearer Is a registered student,
Is sufficient.
This offer Is mode In the hope
that other firms will also follow and institute the European
custom of giving students
lower prices than the rest of
the population.
Frankly, this Is an experiment, and
the continuation of this policy depends on the students themselves. If
sufficient students take advantage of
this offer to obtain their clothes and
furnishings at a distinctly lower price
with full assurance of satisfactory
quality, this offer may be extended,
or else turned Into an annual event.
As we said above,
TUUM EST
BETTER CLOTHES FOR MEN
FINE FURNISHINGS
AU wool Mackinaw
Bobtail Coat, green,
blue and brown. Reg.
price   a$7iS0
The Largest Exclusive Men's Store
in Vancouver
45 East Hastings Street
i ■,—^
mmmm^m
Friday, October 16, 1931
THE    UBYSSEY
Page Three
r
V
■»»p
ATTENTION!
Contributions to this page
may be left in the
PUBLICATIONS
OFFICE
ROOM 206
AUDITORIUM
SAY! CANT YOU
TAKE  A  HINT
SOMETIME ?
"The   postman   homeward   plods  his
weary way,
And leaves the world to letters and
to me."
No, Gray did not write that. He
wrote something like it, but, of
course, not nearly so good. But then
he didn't have my advantages, ft he
had taken English 1 for three consecutive years—he probably took a
correspondence course, "Act now—
83V4 lessons only 12.34—position guaranteed!' And look what a nice position he did get. In a church yard!
And not even a fashionable churchyard either. Some obscure little
village called Steak-Puddlngton or
something. Just a minute, I'll find
out—the Literary Editor said it was
Stoke Poges, and it may be, for all
I know.
Let's see, where was I before I interrupted myself? Oh yes, I was tell
lug you about the enormous amount
of mall I've been receiving lately,
wasn't I? No? Well, I've told you
now, haven't I?   So there.
It is some time ago'now that I
started my correspondence column
in the Muck page. Although It has
seldom, In fact never, been published
owing to the lack of pesrp—persp—
prsylc—or—intelligence on the part of
the Editor, please do not Imagine that
the good work has been dropped!
Oh, nunno. Far otherwise. My mail
bag has been so heavy lately that
with its aid, and a few shovelfuls of
coal pinched from next door, the
furnace has been getting along quite
nicely. I must tell you about our
furnace sometime.
However, I have just time to answer a few letters. The Editor has
hied himself away on a voyage to
far countries. 1 think he's down in
the Caf., but I* m not sure. Now,
here's a letter from a Freshman:
"I am In great trouble about my
pat rabbit. It is, in many ways, an
excellent rabbit, but I find that it
has five legs, instead of four. Ia this
usual? The extra lag gets in the way
when I want to push it into the hutch
and the old leg, being In the centre,
causes It to move In a contlnous circle.   What do you advise?
(Disappointed),
Arts '35.
You have my sympathy and I can
quite understand both your difficulty
and your disappointment. I am afraid
you are right and the rabbit is
wrong. It is most unusual for a
quadruped to have five legs. It is
also very selfish. Many rabbits have
only two. Are you sure about the
fifth? You haven't counted In it's
tall, I suppose? I hardly know what
to suggest. Have you tried pushing
the extra leg In? I wouldn't try pull
Ing It out. This might have disss
trous consequences. If it had been
an extra tall, you could have decora,
ted ii up with a bow, but you could
hardly do that with an extra leg,
could you? It Is certainly odd—In
fact, almost Indecent. There seems
so little one can suggest. You might
try boring a hole in the extra leg
with a brace and bit. Then you could
hang it up on a hook. This would
save the labor of building another
hutch. I'm not sure that It would
sleep In that position, but you could
try.
Then here's another effusion from
a member of the Faculty whose name
I shall not reveal.
"I have a set of false teeth—two
complete dentures—the appearance of
which is excellent and all that could
be desired. However, of late the
lower denture is apt to suddenly
stand on end and bite my upper lip.
This Is Inconvenient, not to say em-
barrasing.    What do you suggest?"
My dear Professor, what do you
think I am? A garage? Really, this
one gets past my guard completely.
Any ordinary request I can generally
sometimes deal with, but this one	
I hardly know what to say. It Is very
difficult.
I think if I was In your plate-er,
place—I'd go to a dentist and have
them changed. You might try summonsing your dentist for assault, but
whether you could prove he bit you
with your own teeth, is something
I am not prepared to give,my opinion
on. Have you tried changing the
plates? It might make the children
afraid of you, of course. And then
again, switching the plates might
make you bite your lower lip, and
then how could you eat your soup?
If it was my. personal problem, I
think I would turn them out into a
two acre field, surrounded with
barbed wire, and drop a brick on
thorn who-! they weren't looking.
However, this seems rather cruel,
doesn't it?
The only thing I could suggest Is to
either;
(a^   Keep your mouth always open
<b)   Always  closed
ic"»   Both.
icD   Ed.  Note—Remove teeth.
Gadzooks! The Editor approach-
eth! He looks as if he will drag me
away   from    my    rusty—er,   trusty—
I   Litany  Coroner   I
l|l —■—..—..——H«.y^ii-.JT
I
Often
Wonder why .
The
Man who
Paints
All day long
On the
Granville Street Bridge
Does not
Wear
His Science sweater
For
He clearly Is,
A Science man
Because
He only does
The same thing
All day long.
HAVE YOU SEEN HIM?
ALAS.
It seems
That Artsmen
And Sciencemen
Have again
Met
In aromatic opposition,
Behold
And lo,
We have
De panting Artsmen,
Baptismal Sciencemen,
One polluted pond,
And other educational exhibits.
And yet
There Is
Something lacking
Where is Mr. Butterfield?
Mr, Butterfield?
Where is ha? ,
Surely the presence
Of this great debunker
And his dignified friends
The Hottentots
Is needed
To lend '
Appropriate patronage    -
To these time-honored ravels?
-R. A.
in
Tra Ut la la
Oh what's the diff
My little story
Will be brlff
And everything ■*   -■--t*-~".;
Will rhyme with if.
Though English critics
Well may sniff
The whole darn thing
Must rhyme with if
So we'll be finished
In a jiff.
Tra la la la. .
I'm frightened lest
The Ed-ln-Chlff
Should end this effort
With a biff ,
So while I'm here
A llssen giff.
Tra la la la.
My cerebellum's
Slightly stiff
So I'll seek quiet
Or a cliff.
I think dear Reader
That's enlff.
Tra la la la.
What People Really
Are Saying
i.
Dr. Sedgewick: William Shakespere
after all, was, no gentleman.
Pete Frattinger: It's funny, I'm
just built long enough to reach the
ground. Another two Inches and I
couldn't have, made it."
Dr. Sedgewick: If you ask me what
happened between 1660 and 1776, I
can answer you In one word, "Hell."
Prof F. 0. C. Wood: A cherub now
and then Is all right, but when you
have nineteen ot them grinning at
you	
Prof. Wilcox:
1. These papers will be marked
with an almost savage ferocity.
2.—this passage refers to Helen of
Troy—and other places.
3. and this passage refers to Eleanor, the wife of Henry II. She was
a very experienced woman—he* was
her third husband. She literally got
married all over the map.
Nelson Allan: I've been trying for
years to get in W. P. A. S.
Cherub: Here's a problem, girls:
am I good-looklng-
From far-off Michigan comes this
lonely cry: the moaning of a homesick, seasick, lovesick, and even Hat-
zic, Ex-Sports Editor. Never mind
Talcum ole sock, we miss you too.
We don't know what to do with our
loose change any more.—Ed. Note.
* * *
The True Story of the Origin of the
Frogs in the Lily Pond,
by Maybelle McGillicuddy
Once upon a time there was a
lonely Freshman, so lonely and deserted by all. Even his fellow classmen shunned him, for after all his
best friends would not tell him. It
was the custom of this little boy to
wander throughout the campus,
thinking .about life and what he
would do when he grew up. Other
Freshmen could go about having
their noses pulled by prominent professors, or being compulsorlly bathed
by philanthropic sophmores, but not
he. He was a thing apart just like
the Science faculty.
He gradually grew bitter, and more
and more homesick. He determined
he would make someone speak to
him. He wended his way to Ridington castle thinking in his ignorance
that this was the bast place to find
students and on the way he spied a
man approaching. The man was
talking to himself. He was talking
about a woman called Jane.
It was now or never.
Our hero stood in the path of the
man. Re stopped him. He shouted,
"Speak to me!"
The man threw him in the Lily
Pond.
The Freshman was not old enough
to swim and so he perished. He
would have remained in the pond
with the lilies and the lunch papers
Just like all Freshmen who are
thrown In annually. But his case
waa different. He was innocent of
crime and so the bearded god of the
Castle took pity on him and changed
him into a frog. But in the transformation the Freshman lost every
thing except his color and now he
sits spouting his wrath at tha world.
But the god of the Castle.realised
that the Freshman would be lonely
In the lily pond, so, still being in a
genial mood, he went to the Caf.,
picked up the first Freshman he trod
on, and, taking him under his arm,
carted him over the campus and deposited him gently but firmly in the
sacred pool. He too became a frog.
He too remained green. He too spouts
his wrath at all and sundry and his
fellow-frog In particular. And there
they are and will remain until the
next Arts-Science battle demolishes
the ornaments in the Lily Pond.
MUCKATORIAL
We're so proud of ourselves now that we no longer gaze
with awe and wonder at the Editor-in-Chief of our wuthy joinal.
Last issue we had our page all set up by seven-thirty P.M. This,
in itself, is something to toot our editorial horn about. No, we
haven't bought a new hat yet.  We don't wear one, anyway.
Our most humble apologies to "Yes-I think so!" Really, we
couldn't get you in. The distribution of ads left us no other
alternative. We won't permit it to happen again if we can help
it.
The News Manager just asked me how we can apologize to
a column. If you don't know how the following story will enlighten you.
Once upon a time there was a Sports Editor; he was a very
sporty Sports Editor. Accordingly, he never looked where he
was going, and one day bumped into something. After apologizing profusely, he found it was a telephone pole. This story is
purely theoretical. If, however, the pole had been a column,
he would have apologized to a* column. Q. E. D.
You, Too, Can Learn This Trick At Home
The above picture shows a man performing one of the many parlor
tricks that are explained in the new series of articles written by Arthur
Mometer. "Anyone can be popular with the aid of my little set of booklets,"
opined Mr. Mometer in an Interview granted to the press, "but not without
a certain amount of practice."
The trick shown here Is very complex, and requires a vast amount
of piano wire. The feet are suspended from any convenient chandelier with
the aid of the said wire. A belt provided with a loop Is the next requisite.
More piano wire is passed through a hook in the celling and through the
belt loop, to help hold up the would-be parlor entertainer.  A thin strip of
piano wire, provided with a running noose, is placed about the neck of the
trickster, so as to relieve still more weight from the chandelier. If everything
holds after testing, grasp any round object In the hands, and Imitate picture.
Success is guaranteed.
T"-
MUCKING WITH SHRDLU
BY TOM HOW
The next item on our program will
be a parody of the song "We Wanna
Go Back to Michigan."
We wanna go back to U.B.C.
To dear Vancouver town
Back to the Arts and Science feuds,
Back to the Students' Council prudes.
Oh, we wanna go back to U.B.C.
But it ain't for such as we,
We wanna go back  (we wanna go
back
To U. B. C.
What If we had to pay all the bills
Just think of all th | fun
The Freshmen in the Lily Pond
Scaring the frogs of Oood King
John.
Oh you don't know what you mean
to us,
Oh dear old Varsity,
We wanna go back, we wanna go
back
To U. B. C.
Voices in dead of night.
Himie—"Wake up, quick, wake up!"
Root-"Can't."
Hlmle-"Why not?"
Root—"Ain't sleeping,"
Guide—"Now we shall see the sarcophagus of King Tut,"
Bashful Old Maid—"I'd better wait
here."
I'll be at the Fashion Show. October 23 and 24, Hudsons Bay Store.
—Cherub
ITALIAN WORDS
THE TOURIST
SHOULD KNOW
Po—Not wealthy.
Vatican—To   become   corpulent   once
more.
Flume—Carbon  monoxide.
Mussolini—To wedge your way in
with.
Slgnors—One  who  does  wrong;sing
you Signors, sing.
Venice—Statue  without  arms.—Ex.
Times are so hard the gigolos are
dancing with one another in Germany.
News Item:
Burglar finds lady in bath. Covers
her with his revolver.
Small boy, to butcher after breaking
window, "I'll square things, Mr,
Brown—I'll autograph the ball."—Ex!
typewriter.    Well,   Cheerio,   old   thi; | for a while.
V42un, sO He got me ;p036 y4% de—
-G. P.
Ed.  Note:   Maybe that'll hold him
Himie:—Lend me ninety-five cents,
will  ya?    I  don't  want  to  break  a
dollar. —Ex.
ETAOIN AND COLLEGE HUMOR
There is a newcomer to the pages of the "Ubyssey" who is
a stranger to many. I refer to Mr. Zilch, The appearance of
Mr Zilch's name on the Muck-a-Muck page will not be tolerated. However, in this case it is a necessity. We, the disciples
of Shrdlu Etaoin, wish to state our case.
First for the benefit of the Freshmen, I will relate the oft
told legend of Etaoin and his deadly rival, College Humor. At
the top of this page in the right-hand corner is the smiling face
of Shrdlu Etaoin, Muse of Muck. On my left, the boy with the
pickle fork, is College Humor. Below the title of "Muck-a-
Muck" is depicted an unholy battle between 18 (count 'em
yourself) of Shrdlu's warriors and 31 devils. The 18 red-skins
with their tomahawks are getting the best of it; and the forces of
College Humor are (as a former Muck writer puts it) "having
a devil of a time fighting Shrdlu, who has been giving them
hell."
Now this Mr. Zilch happens to be an offspring of College
Humor. Bom and reared between the pages of that periodical,
he comes to us uninvited and expects us to welcome him with
open arms.
It can't be done, Mr. Zilch.
a'   a   a   a
WHAT NEXT!
Down in San Quentin, California State Prison, the inmates
can enroll as extra-mural students of the University of California. And of the 5000 convicts, over half of them are taking
advantage of this privilege.
And they pay no fees. Next fall, if I fail to return to
U. B. C, don't think that I have fallen by the wayside and left
college for good. Oh no! I'll be down in my private cell in San
Quentin with a slide-rule in one hand and a philosophy book
in the other, trying to get something (if a college education is
something) for nothing.
It ought to be easy to get board and lodging down there.
The best plan, I believe, would be to allow myself to be arrested
for stealing. If the judge acquitted me, I could shoot him. If
I was acquitted for doing that, I could appeal the case. Eventually I would find myself in a cell, perhaps a padded cell. And
then I could get my free college education.
I can only guess what courses are popular this year at San
Quentin. I should imagine, since hundreds of the prisoners are
laboring daily among the rocks, that the class in Geology would
be large. Ex-bootleggers, of course, are studying Organic
Chemistry; bank bandits are learning Economics and the business of Banking. Gangsters are probably swotting at Group
Psychology.
Men doomed to die in the electric chair are probably given
a chance to enroll in a short course in Mathematics or Physics.
After studying Maths, until the date of their execution, they
would, no doubt, be ready to sit through it all. If they crammed
the essentials of Physics into their heads they would learn all
about electricity and its properties and they could go to their
death with Ohm's Law on their lips. Ed. Note:—How come
"Extra-mural students?"
Radioland
Good afternoon Boys and Girls.
This is Uncle Rufus speaking to you,
and bringing the program sponsored
by McNutt, Nltwltt and Dumm. Remember, kiddies,, that if you have
not been swimming in a McNutt, Nltwltt and Dumm bathing suit, you
have missed the point of this broadcast. The first number on our program has been cancelled, so our first
selection will be the second number.
However, we will omit that too and
go on with our talk.
This week McNutt, Nltwltt and
Dumm are sponsoring a contest
which takes the form of a Trans-
Uly-Pondlne Natatorial Championship. The record holder in this contest is Mr. St. John Madeley who
covered the gruelling course in the
splendid time of nothing flat. Mr.
Madeley gives all the credit to his
McNutt, Nltwltt and Dumm bathing
suit. "If I had worn any other type
of swimming costume," stated Mr.
Madeley, "I would most certainly
have won the contest." As it is Mr.
Madeley won by default. This Is a
glorious boost for McNutt, Nltwltt
and Dumm bathing suits. AU McNutt, Nltwltt and Dumm bathing
suits are made from the highest grade
burlap, and are guaranteed to last
at least twenty feet. Another special feature incorporated In the McNutt, Nltwltt and Dumm batldng
suit is tha non-ravelling weavu of the
burlap, The next item on our program ia entitled "Two Little Olrls
in Blue." This reminds us that all
McNutt, Nltwltt and Dumm bathing
suits are weather proof, and keep
the wearer warm in all kinds of
weather.
If your McNutt, Nltwltt and D>tmm
bathing suit should aver be stained
by the water, we advise you to soak
the McNutt, Nltwltt and Dumm, bathing suit in anything that you have
handy exoept "McNutt, Nitwitt and
Dumm Cleaner, Especially Prepared
For Cleansing McNutt, Nltwltt and
Dumm Bathing Suits."
The Burble Sisters will now read
"Twu Little Olrls In Blue" which reminds us that all McNutt, Klrw.tt
m.il Dumm bathing suits come in
evory recofnired shade, includlon the
Scandinavian. Here they are folks,
a».d don't f >r»tt that McNutt, N.tv.ltt
and Dumm bathing suits can bo obtained at your local grocer's.
Well! Now that that's over let ua
tell you of another contest being
backed by the McNutt, Nitwitt and
Dumm Bathing Suit Co. Ltd. In the
window of the S, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, etc.
Cent Store there is a McNutt, Nitwitt and Dumm bathing suit which
has been worn once. ■ If you are able
to distinguish the suit from the background, the suit is yours. Remember
If it's a McNutt, Nitwitt and Dumm
bathing suit it's the best show in
town. And this brings to a close the
period sponsored by McNutt, Nltwltt
and Dumm, makers of ultra modern
bathing suits. This is radio station
O-O-O, now signing off at exactly
1:37% Pacific standard time, by the
Heilova Watch. Oood afternoon
kiddies.
Detective:—I had a hard case last
week.
Friend-—What was it?
Detective:—Well, a man was shot.
The knife was found by his side. Who
do you think poisoned him?
Friend:—Who?
Detective: — Nobody. He hanged
himself.—Ex.
Himie:—What's the difference between an elephant and a can of tomatoes?
Vance:-—1 can't even think of a resemblance.
Himie:—Neither can rido n bicycle.
My girl dresses In three things, and
two of them are shoes.—Ex.
Cherub:—I thought the Hotel Vancouver was a Yiddish Hotel because
the waiters always come around saying "Jewish coffee?" But now I know
it's not.
Gordy Hoot:—How come?
Cherub:—"I heard a guy say, "No!
Irish tea."
He drank the nectar from har lips
As by the kitchen fire they sat,
And wondered if any other guy
Had ever drunk from a muj{ like
that.
Times are so hard that the India
rubber man had to contract to take
the place of the midget in the side-
sho\V.
Lapses and Relapses
Culled From Council
Earl Vance (at supper): Let's get
Mr, Williams down here to conduct
the soup.
Council in Chorus: No olives for
supper?   We'll resign.
Bill Whimster: I paid five cents
for a three cent paper. The A.M.S.
Is gypped again.
Jack Thomson: (after voting Agriculture club expenses for dairy-
judging competition). And we sure
hope they know their cows.
President L.S.E. to Treasurer A.M-
: Hey, are you sitting on those
biscuits?
President M.A.A.: Excuse me talking with my mouth open.
Earl Vance: —some small subject
like "World Depression. It's cause
and cure."
President M. A. A,: How do you get
one good team out of two punk
teams?
Part Five
From my position behind the doors
I could see Into the dim Interior of
the cavern. Across the room stole
the intrepid pair, each step bringing
them nearer to a shapeless tarpaulin-
covered thing that stood In the corner. Emile stooped and lifted up the
corner of the covering.
At this moment the great detective
broke the silence with the words,
"Do you know I've changed my
name?"
"No," remarked the unbelieving
Emile.
"Sure thing," came the reply,
"somebody or other doesn't like it,
so I've decided to change it to SUo
Rants."
"Oood. Idea" grunted Emile, <1 never did like your other name anyhow."
"O. K.," said Rants. Let., get ^
with our investigation."
At these words Emile completed
lifting up the corner of the tarpaulin.
There lay row upon row of neatly
slacked Handbooks. Each row being
separated from the other by soma
more Handbooks.
"Aha!" snarled Rants,' "Counterfeiters, eh?"
No sooner had the words left his
Ups than a purring voice broke in on
tha conversation, "I'm sorry gentlemen, but I must ask you to elevate
your hands."
On tha other side of tha stack of
books stood a hooded figure, an automatic pistol grasped in each gloved
hand. On either side ot the central
figure shadowy forms were lookinl,
From behind tha door I counted
at least five of these skulking mlr-
mldona. Now was the time for act-
Ion. Taking my trusty pipe from my
pocket, I shouted, "You go to Hamlet, and sea how you like it!"
Wheeling in his tracks tha hooded
leader fired a single shot in my direction. The bullet struck my hud,
bounced etf, bit the oaillng, gem/
plated tha sJrcult and «ied. lb
wielder of the gun stared fa aston- '
lshment. From his lips poured thousands of Chinese ejaculations, such as:
"Oolam dah," Pas du tout" (father
of twins) and "Tuum 1st," but thwe
are only a few. «Aha!" 1 yloped.
"Not for nothing did I play S03W In
my infancy."
A shivering sigh burst from tho lips
of the astounded Chang Suey, for so
the leader proved to be. Raising his
hand for silence, and also for exercise, he moved forward to speuk. But
at that moment I showed the stem
of my (not really mine) pipe t»d
cried, "Up with your hands, oil of
you!"
Instantly the hooded leader disappeared from our sight. A trap door
in the floor had opened and swallowed him up. At that moment the
sound of the weird machine we were
seeking came to our esj-s. From beneath the floor came the awful S
screaming laughter of a madman.
EmUe turned to me and said, "It's
that infernal crime wave machine of
his, Oscar. Well all be murdering
each other In a few seconds, as soon
as he can focus the ray on us."
(To Be Continued)
What People Ought
To Be Saying
think debating is a
I'd much  rather  be
NOTICE
We have discovered how the Faculty solves the problem of left-
handed writers in the classroom. As
the Reader no doubt knows, a discrepancy occurs at the end of each
row of seats. By seating an armless
person at the end of these rows the
difficulty is easily and simply overcome. Another method would be to«
seat the southpaw in a reverse position. That is, let the student sit
with his or her back to the professor. This idea is hot feasible during
examinations.   Voila.
Yeah, the War cost Sandy an arm.
He couldn't bring himself to throw
awny a I'find grenade —E<<.
"So long, sue you later.'
"Not if I sue you first.'
•Ex.
"This will remove your bad breath,"
assured the hangman as he adjusted
the noose around the criminal's neck
-Ex!
Ev.  King:   I
silly subject.
Sports Editor.
Dr. Sedgewick: Mr. Larsen and I
both agree on the subject
Gordy Root: I'm not going to use
the word "Pel" any more.
Himie: No, I'm not so fussy about
steak and onions.
Paul Koozoolln: I'm a mysogynist.
Lukie: No. I never write to boys
In Michigan.
Kiku: It's no trouble at all to drive
a car.
Wilf Lee: Cherub, you must out
down your staff.
Sinjin: Naw, I don't want a bite of
your chocolate bar.
Mollle Jordan: What, In W.P.A.S.
again. I'm getting tired of having
my name there.
Tom How: Gee, but slide rules are
easy to manipulate.
Aqua: I'm just a little drink.
Betty—"Stop! Don't do that. Stop!
Do you hear me?   Stop!"
Paul—"What do you think you're
doing? Writing a telegram?" r^Tr=pr*T5^«r¥|rgCF?^
^RfT^|T^
Page Four
ni    ';, i Mi   ■■■■:
THE    UBYSSEY
Friday, October 16,1931
Varsity Victorious
Over Newcomers
In Athletic Meet
•____a«__»-S»w-«»as_e--a»J_
Varsity upset all the dope when they scored a decisive victory
over the Frosh on the new oval Wednesday afternoon. The new
track wej somewhat soft and as a result the times were not exceptionally good. But two records fell, Haddon Agnew throwing the discus 123 feet and the girl's eight-a-side relay team covering the half mile in 1.59 ,-.,,.*
The sprints uncovered a new star in the person of Bill Stott,
Who Showed real class in copping the 100 and 220 dashes from
such men as Bob Osborne and Max Stewart. Miss Esther
Paulin took away honors in the girl's division, winning both the
60 and 100 yard sprints in handy style. Haddon Agnew, a
freshman, won the javelin, shot-put and discus. Harry Prevey,
exchange student from Alberta, arrived when the jumps were
half over, but succeeded in'capturing the event with a jump of
5 feet. Jumpers found the runway much too soft, as it had been
prepared but one hour before the start.
Prevey and Gordon Root could not
conie to a decision In the pole vault,
and had to split the points. Tne last
track event of the day was probably
the best. Max Stewart, (who hasn't
befn to Varsity for seven years),
Bob Osborne, and P. S. Campbell
tore down the stretch In the 400-yard
race to finish practically In a dead
heat. The judges caught them In
the above order.
A fair-slxed crowd attended, everyone being unanimous in the opinion
that the new oval should do much
towards reviving Interest In track.
Col. Wilkin and John Muter acted aa
judges. Bill Lucas was timer, and J.
Irvine fired the gun. Ralph Thomas
was general supervisor, and was assisted by Bob Alpen. These boys
kept things hustling and each race
wis run on schedule.
Results: 100-yard dash—Bill Stott
(», Max Stewart (V), Bob Osborne
(V).  Time: 10 and one-fifth seconds.
lOOiyard dash—women — Esther
Paulin* (V), Beatrice Sutton (V>,
UuwlJtowntree (V). Time: 12 and
two-fifth seconds.
One mile—men—Jimmy Dunn (V),
George Allan (V), A. Thaln (V).
Time: 84 and two-fifths seconds
nO-yarde-men-BUl Stott (F), Bob
Osborne (V), Max Stewart (V).
Time: 24 and one-fifth seconds.
eo-yards-women — Esther Paulin
(V), Beatrice Sutton (V), Laurel
Rowntree  (V).   Time:  8 seconds.
880-yards—men—Alfie Allan (V>,
R. Forsyth (V), H. F. Salisbury (V).
Time: 2 min. U seconds.
Women's Relay—Varsity (L. Rowntree, M. Wilson, N. Jackson, F. Quail,
N. Carter). (J. Higgenbothem, B.
Sutton, and Esther Paulin). Time: 1
min. 50 seconds.   (A new record).
3 Mile race—men—Sinclair (V),
Thaln (V).   Time: 17 min. 7 sec.
440-yards—men—Max Stewart (V),
Bob Osborne (V), P. S. Campbell
(V).  Time: 54 and one-fifth seconds.
Men's high jump—Harry Prevey
(V), 5 feet; Rolfe Forsythe (V), Jack
Milllcan  (F).
IN GAMES
After two hard games over the
week-end, Varsity's .Senior Soccermen emerged with a draw, a loss,
and a number of injuries. Saturday's game at Cambie Street saw
the Chinese Students.victorious by
a 3-0 scorr, while Monday's game
with Pt. Oiey United at Kerrlsdale
resulted In a 2-2 draw.
The first game was extremely fast,
with a hard ground and a light ball.
Varsity kicked off against the sun,
and continued on the attack, but the
forwards could not get their shots
on goal although they managed to
force several corners. Play next
switched to end rushes on tiie part
of both teams, and the Orientals
scored their first two goals, one of
them being via the penalty route
when the Varsity goal-tender pushed
an enterprising Chinese forward out
of the way. Soon after the interval,
the sons of the far East added their
final counter, and a belated blue and
gold rally failed to reduce the Chinese margin of victory.
The game on Monday was also
played at top speed, with the Varsity
side showing to far better advantage
than on Saturday. Dave Todd got
away soon after the opening whistle
and put his team one up when he
drove in a hard shot for the first
tally of the game. Pt. Grey equalized shortly after however, with an
unstoppable drive which struck the
underside of the bar. Play was fast
and fairly even for some time, when
Dave Todd again broke Into the scor-
uuusiin   v«/. in* °°iunm by converting a penalty
Women's high jump-Nancy Carter which was conceded to Varsity by
(V)-4 feet, 1 In.; Janet Higglnbot-
ham (V), Nina Jackson (V).
Men's broad jump-Bob Osborne
<V)-17 feet, 10 In; Hugh Ormsby
(V), Rolfe- Forsythe (V).
Women's broad jump — Laurel
Rowntree (V), J. Reed (V), N. Jackson (V).
Pole vault—Tie: Gordon Root and
Harry Prevey—9 feet, 7% In.
Javelin throw-H- N. Agnew <F)—
120 ft. 4 in; H. McKltrlch (F), Denis
Nlcol  (V).
Discus throw—H. N. Agnew (F)-
122 and eight-tenths ft; A. McGulre
(V), R. Walker (F).
(This also is a new record).
Shot put—H. N. Agnew (F)-32 ft.
91n; A. McGulre (V), Denis Nlcol
(V).
Hammer throw—Denis Nicol (V)—
54 feet, J. Milllcan (F).
reason of a back-charge against Todd.
From then on Pt. Grey had a slight
edge until half-time. In the second
half, even play continued to be the
order of the game with both goals
sustaining some very narrow escapes,
until Frattinger was beaten and Pt.
Grey garnered the equalizing marker.
The team: Frattinger, McGill, and
Grant; Costain, Kozoolin, and Mac-
Dougal; Reid, Cooke, Mundle, D.
Todd and L. Todd.
In Island
Journey
Senior A basketball team broke
even on the Vancouver Island games
last week-end. The Canadian Champions lost to Nanalmo In a close game
on Friday 16-19, and then beat Al-
berni 39-17 in the other game Saturday.
Pi Campbell, peerless forward,
leading scorer of the V. and D.
league last year, and Bulldog Chapman, stellar defense man, missed the
Nanalmo boat Friday night and did
not play In Nanalmo. They managed
to get over In time to join the squad
on Saturday before they left for Al-
berni. Apparently the team missed
these two men in the Friday night
game.
The first game with Nanalmo was
a thriller. Varsity opened the scoring
and Were leading 6-0 halfway through
the period, but could not hold the
mine boys to this score. The local
lads wiped out this lead and the
score was even at half-time. In the
second half the locals, who were in
better condition than the college
team, ran In enough baskets to hold
off a U. B. C. rally near the end of
the game. The miners used a zone defense system throughout, as opposed
to a man-to-man defense used by the
students. Lome Falconer, hustling
manager of the students, had*.to play
In this game owing to the absence of
Chapman and Campbell. The Island-
ders sent word back to sign him on
the squad. Bob Osborne, lanky
young guard and the most promising
defense man In B. C. topped the Varsity scoring and was'the Individual
star of the game along with Cyclone
Lee and L. Nicholson. Little Bobby
McDonald played a great game for
his Initial senior start. Eddie Armstrong sprained his ankle during the
game. This was a sad blow to the
Varsity hopes, as Eddie Is a star performer, and knows where the basket
it located.
The team for this game was: Osborne (8), Lee (4), Armstrong (2),
Nicholson (2), McDonald and Falconer.
The Champs met Chapman and
Campbell in Nanalmo on Saturday
and proceeded to Alberni where they
were the star attraction at the official opening of the new Alberni Gym.
The game with Alberni was a different story from the Nanalmo battle. The Canadian Champs found
their feet and with the team at full
strength waltzed through the West
Coasters to the tune of 39-17. The
game was too one-sided to be interesting. The whole team shared in
the scoring honours and there was
no one man outstanding. The team
was the same as that for the first
game with the exception of Armstrong and Falconer and the addition
of Chapman and Campbell.
Doc Thorpe accompanied the team
as trainer and Jack Thomson as
Student Council representative. This
is a new procedure with travelling
Varsity teams
The team following this trip will
now get down to serious conditioning
for the league schedule which starts
early In November. Wally Mayers
and Ken McDonald will be out early
next week and with the addition of a
good guard the boys will present a
very formidable line for the opening
of the Melon tossing season.
Junior Soccer
In Losing Tilts
Over Week-end
Varsity Junior Soccer team went
down'to defeat on Saturday at the
hands of Woodland Thistles by a
score of 8-0. The Thistles gave a
clever exhibition of ball control and
fast accurate passing which baffled
a bewildered U, B. C. squad. At half
time the score was 2-0, but after tiie
oranges, Woodland ran wild to score
three goals In rapid succession. Al'
though the Varsity defense tightened
up somewhat, the opposition ran in
three more counters before the final
whistle.
In- Monday's game, the same squad
lost a close decision at Brlghouse
from the Richmond team. As lndl-
cited by the score, of 3-2, the Farmers were barely value for a win, play
being very close and even, Richmond opened hostilities with a goal
about twenty minutes from the start,
but Atwater equalized soon after
with a hard, low drive which gave
the Richmond net-minder no chance
to save. No further scoring occurred
until after half-time, when the Lulu
Islanders had the best of matters to
the tune of 2 goals to Varsity's one,
and accounted for the final score-
Varsity 2, Richmond 3.
Grid Squad
Meralomas
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Rugger Teams
Divide Games
In Miller Cup
Varsity's Miller Cup English rugby
teams broke even Saturday at Brockton Point when U. R. C. scored a de-/
cisive 9-3 win over Ex-Tech and Varsity lost a hard fought game to the
more experienced Ex-King George
outfit by a score of 6-0.
In the game between U. B. C. And
Ex-Tech. U. B. C. proved Itself de|
cledly superior, carrying the fight
to the opposing team for the first
half of the game. Most of the play
during this half was within Ex-
Tech's 25 yard line, and was marked
by considerable penalty kicking.
Twice the blue and gold failed to
score on these kicks but on the third
attempt, Barratt converted. Moyes
was accepting passes very well, giving his team a chance) to break away
from their opponents. Barratt accepted a pass from Moyes and scored
the only touch of the game. In the
second half Ex-Techs made a desperate attempt to even the score but
failed through lack of team work.
They scored their only points on a
penalty kick.
The U. B. C. team was as follows:
Barratt, Moyes, K. Mercer, A. Mercer, Dalton, Ellis, Mason, Mitchell,
Bell-Irving, Hotson, Davidson, Ak-
hurst and Brand.
In the second game, Ex-King
George, an older and more experienced squad, had most of the play,
panning Varsity In its own half of
the field for the greater part of the
first half. Fine tackling by the blue
and gold defense was all that prevented the score from mounting. to
much greater proportions. Niblo
scored on a penalty while Archibald
went over for a try for the Ex-King's
total scoring of the game.
In the second half Varsity woke up
and carried the fight right back to
enemy territory. The Greenshirts
were equal to the occasion, however,
and prevented any scoring, to hold
their 8-0 lead throughout the remainder of the game.
Varsity was represented by: Rob-
bins, Stewart, Stobie, Cleveland,
Pugh, Gaul, Tye, Worthlngton, D.
Brown, Rogers, Senkler, Pearson,
Weld, Hendley and B. Brown.
Both English Rugby squads are in
good shape for to-morrow's games.
The U.B.C. team meets the Ex-Mageu
outfit and are confident that they
can take this battle. However, the
Varsity have a much harder task
ahead of them. They will meet the
fast moving Rowing Club, who, as
of yet have not lost a game and who
lead the league.
The Varsity crew intends to take
the Rowers, and have been training
very hard for the last week with this
in view. They will have the services
of Cleveland at fullback, who has not
been out before thia season, but as
an experienced and capable player
should add considerable strength to
his squad.
Students have an excellent chance
to see both these teams in action.
Both games are to be played at the
oval. U. B. C. will kick off at 1:15
and Varsity will start immediately
after at 3:15.
The teams will be: U. B. C—back-
field, Ramber, Barratt, Owen C. Dalton, A. Mercer, K. Mercer, D. Ellis,
Moyes, Mitchell, Mason, Bell-Irving,
Brand, Nixon, Davidson, Ackhurst.
Varsity—backfield: H. Cleveland,
Hanbury, C. Cleveland, Gaul, Stobie,
Stewart, Pye, Pugh. Forwards-
Brown, Weld, Hedley, Rogers, H,
Pearson, Sinclair, D. Brown,
Vanity's senior gridders will go all
out for victory when they tackle
Westminster Dodekas, Saturday, at
Queen's park. The collegians will attempt to wipe out the defeat they
suffered at the hands of the Royal
City squad when they received a 5-1
setback. The varsity team are confident of a Win after their Inspired
showing against Meralomas.
Tom Brown will be back In tha line
to alternate with Purdue at snap
while Jack Steele, tricky backfield
man, will still be out of tha game
owing to injuries received in the first
lame of the season, Doug. Mclntyre,
who led Varsity to triumph In tho
game against Meralomas will also be
out owing to a bad blow he received
on the ankle. His place on the team
Will be hard to fill.
Ian Morrison will return after an
absence of one tussle to take up his
position at inside while Ernie Peden,
who was elected captain of the team
recently, will play Inside Instead of
middle. The rest of the team will take
their usual places with no startling
change of lineup. According to Johnnie McLean, president of the club,
Varsity should win with ease.
An inspired Varsity grid team came
from behind in the last few minutes
of the game against Meralomas to
snatch victory from defeat and to
down the Clubbers 12-6, Saturday,
afternoon. This comes as sweet revenge for the losses Varsity suffered
last year at the hands of the Kitsll-
anoans when they twice defeated the
Collegtlans in the last few minutes
of the game.
In the first quarter Meralomas
blocked a Varsity kick and rushed
over in time to gain the first score
of the game. The try was improved
and from then on Varsity started to
press and for the most of the game
kept the opposition penned up with
rushes down the field.
Mclntyre Played a brilliant game
In the backfield and assisted greatly
with his twisting runs in gaining a
victory for the blue and gold. Dl-
rom's plunges had the spectators on
their feet as he gained yard after
yard with mighty heaves through the
line. Dick Farrington at end played
the game of his grid career and held
the Meralomas from returning kicks
time and again.
It was in the second half that Varsity started its inspired offensive with
an aerial attack that had the defenders bewildered, Dirom ran 40 yards
to place the ball over the line when
he galloped through a huge hole,
warded off two Meraloma tacklers
and then safely crossed for Varsity's
first touch. The try was not converted. At this time Mclntyre was continually putting the blue and gold
within scoring distance with his
tricky broken-field runs.
Parker of the,Meralomas caught a
Varsity punt behind his own line and
was unable to return when tackled
by two Varsity men and thus the
students gained a safety touch to
make the score 7-6 In their favor.
Varsity fell on the ball when Mer
alomes fumbled near then* own line
and then Dirom carried the ball eight
yards through the line with one of
his mighty plunges. Murdock carried
the ball the remaining yard to make
the tally 12-6 for Varsity. The game
ended almost immediately after this
score.
The entire Varsity team played a
great game In the second half and
vindicated themselves as a threat to
the rest of the teams in the league.
The one fault of the college side was,
that they were unable at times to get
their kicks away clearly, due to the
line not holding.
Badminton Club
To Enter Three
Teams in League
Varsity Badminton Club has been
able to enter three teams In the Vancouver Badminton League this year,
one in the B Division and two in the
C. The B team plays against seven
other clubs for possession of tiie
Partington Cup, while the two C
teams, each of equal standing, are in
the two divisions of the C league.
The winner of section 1 plays the
winner of section 2 for the R. E.
Guryther Cup.
First half of the schedules have
been drawn up. B division Vajaity
plays B. C. Regiment. October 24, at
Drill Hall, 8 p.m; Hill Club on October 26 at Hill Club: Quilchena on
October 28 at Varsity; New Westminster on November 7 at New Westminster; Vancouyer on November U
at Varsity and North Vancouver on
November  18  at  North  Vancouver.
In C division, section 1 Varsity
plays Shaughnessy on October 28 at
Shaughnessy; Vancouver Heights on
November 4 at Varsity; loco on November 11 at loco; North Vancouver
on November 18 at Varsity and West
End on November 21.
In C division, section 2 Varsity
plays Normal Grads on October 21
at Normal; Port Moody on November 13 at Port Moody; B. C. Regiment on November 25 at Varsity and
New Westminster on December 1 at
New Westminster.
All members of the Club who
would like to try out for positions
on any of the teams are asked to attend all the practises; especially Saturday afternoon. "The Gym has been
obtained for tomorrow, October. 17
from 12:30 to 3:00 p.m. Any one wishing to play regularly on Saturday
afternoon is asked to sign the sheet
in the Gym.
DICK'S
Reorganization Saio
S00 SUITS AND
OVERCOATS
Values to 939.00
EVERY MODEL-EVERY
FABRIC-EVERY COLOR
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The price has been deeply cut.
A Real Buy
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4473 10th Avenue West
Freshmen Win
Grid Opener
Varsity took the lead in the new
Inter-Scholarastlc Canadian Rugby
loop, when the Frosh frounced Vancouver College in the opening game.
This league is a three team organization and a new step in the ever-
advancing progress of Canadian Rugby. Varsity Frosh, Vancouver College, and Magee High. School will
battle for the La Brie Cup, which
has been secured for the league
championship.
The Frosh scored two touchdowns
against a touchdown, a convert and
a deadline kick, to pound out a 10-8
victory.
The team was: Haggerty, Hlndle,
Falconer, Mather, Henderson, Mc-
Crlmmon, Chrysdale, Brlcker, Collins,
Morrow, Goumlnlouk, Guyer, Dwyer,
Odium, Anthony, Knight, Kirby,
Johnston.
League Schedule It At Follows
October 14 - College vs. U. B. C.
October 21 - Magee vs. College
October 28 - U. B. C. vs. Magee
November 4 - tJ. 8. C. vs. College
November 11 - College vs. Magee
November 18 — Magee vs. V. B. C.
WE GREATLY
APPRECIATE YOUR
PATRONAGE
THIS   RESTAURANT   has
been a U. B. C. rendezvous for years.   We hope
it will be your rendez-vous for
years to come.
We certainly try to give the
best meals possible at reasonable prices. But if in any way
we can better serve you, let us
know. Our beat efforts are
yours to command.
CAFE        •-
722 Granville Street
Grass Hockey Club
To Field One Team
The Men's Grass Hockey Club held
their annual fall banquet meeting in
the faculty dining room of the Cafeteria. Professor H. T. Logan, Honorary President of the Club and Prof.
W. G. Black and Mr. F. Hann of the
Mainland Hockey league were prominent guests of the Club.
New members were welcomed Into
the fold, and everyone took part In
a lively discussion with rega/d to the
question of entering only one team
instead of two as at first proposed.
It was finally decided to enter one
team in the Mainland league and to
form a second team for practise purposes.
An effort is being made to have
Grass Hockey represented at the
Olympic games and as a Canadian
team would be largely drawn from
the Mainland, Varsijy payers are in
line for big doings.
The team will play the "Incogs" on
Saturday, time and place to be posted
later, Folowing is the line-up: Lee,
Delap, Jakeway, Spurrier, Baker,
Knight, Barr,, Holmes, Selder, Scott.
Reserves: Ritchie and Lang.
8PALDING
ATHLETIC* SHOES
For All Games
Rugby
Soccer
Basketball
Grass Hockey
Badminton
Special Prices to Varsity
Students
ing
A. G.
& Bros.
Phone Trinity 5401-2
424 Hastings W.
Tlie Vancouver Sun
s
"Vancouver's Home Newspaper"
50c
A MONTH
PHONE TRINITY
#
4111
HANDBOOKS (This Year's)
TOTEMS  (Last Year's)
NOW ON SALE
at
BUSINESS  OFFICE
Room 303 Auditorium
University Book Store
Hours: 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.; Saturdays, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m,
Loose-Leaf Note Books, Exercise Books and Scribblers
at Reduced Prices
Graphic and Engineering Paper, Biology Paper.
Loose-Leaf Refills, Fountain Pens and Ink.
Pencil and Drawing Instruments.
Crepe Paper for Masquerades, etc.
ALL YOUR BOOK SUPPLIES SOLD HERE

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