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The Ubyssey Nov 3, 1931

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 V
r
Issued Twice Weekly by the Students' Publications Board of The University of British Columbia
vol. xrv
VANCOUVER, B. C, TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 3, 1931
No. 12
S
ess
The Invasion Goes Up In Smoke
on
icy
Considerable divergence of opinion among students on the
cancellation of the Victoria Invasion by Students' Council is
evidenced in a number o! interviews granted to the Ubyssey
Monday.
Th. women of Vancouver who are**
attending th. University seem to be
against It, while the girls who com.
from the Bird 6i^.vsee» to 6e distinctly in favor ot it Most Varsity
men, however, are unstinting In their
condemnation of Council's action, although wm. declared th.ms.lves
wh^:h|»iiv»oftt.   •
Men Student, favor Invasion
PWl Barratt, prominent Rugby star,
says "the conduct of members of the
Alma Mater Society at Victoria is
not mbre detrimental to the Society
than is their conduct here." He went
on to state that Council is indulging
In "too much cheeseparing." H.
stressed the traditional outlook, stating that it was a good custom to keep
up. When questioned about Council's
statement that competition in Victoria
is not sufficient to warrant sending
first string teams over, he pointed out
that it was not Victoria College teams
that played tho major teams anyway,
and that competition for the interne-
dlate and Junior teams was strong
enough to cause defeat of Varsity
teams in many Instances.
Larry Jack, Canadian Rugby player,
was most condemnatory, saying that
Council's reasons wore entirely inade-
quate, and that "they never had been
adequate except In the minds of
puerile Councillors." Ho pointed out
that there was no undue misbehavior
'iVJattorla. ;•■"«■••' 'm, • ,•
Clark., president of the
cutting down unnece«ary Mtpendl-
tures,-though he repressed the
Ion that ti^. loss to tiie student
was greater than the saving   "
tthe elimination of the trip, from
social calendar of the University.
e Idea of drunkenness is utter
rot," he stated when asked to express
an opinion on the conduct of students
(Please turn to Page Two)
Packed Home
Hears Szigeti
Give Recital
Many students were present at the
Vancouver Theatre last Wednesday
night when the famous Hungarian
violinist, Szigeti played to a packed
house.   .
Opening his program with Arch*
angelo CorrelU's "La Folia," ssigeti
exhibited a vitality of tone and timbre peculiarly hi. own: not that tiring intensity of bow-pressure and
vibrato one gets so accustomed to
hearing, but the firm lucidity of a
man who hag developed himself as a
satisfactory medium for the violin.
A wonderful performance was
Bach's "Sonata in 0 Mutor" (unao
companled). Then came Moiart's
"Concerto in 0," oedema by Joachim.
After Ihe mtermisslon three program number, were played: "Are-
thusa's Fountain" (Ssymanowsky),
"Siciliano and Rlgaudon" (Francoeur
Xrelsler) and Spanish Dance" (De
Falla-Krelaler).
Ssigeti was accorded enthusiastic
applause throughout, and favored
the spell-bound audience with three
encore.: <.Rondo" (Schubert), "Slavonic Dance No. t' (Dvorak-Krels-
ler) and ''L. Zephyr" (Hubay).
Hundreds of Students
Back National Petition
To Government Leader
<$-
ly accompanist.
Ssigeti will bo th. subject of art
article ln tiie forthcoming Literary
Supplement.
HOMECOMING JUUTS
Liste of Music required for sill
Homecoming Skits must be in the
hands of C. Donaldson today, November 3.
Festivities Have Sad End
For Coed On Hallowe'en
"Hi ho," mused Miss Betty Gourre
of Arts 33 as she tripped daintily
down Barclay Street at 1 a.m. Sunday
morning—"Hi hot Really quite boring,
these Hallowe'en festivities. Wish I
could find something real exciting-
something that would stir me up!"
So saying, she stepped out Into the
greatly-bombed area of Barclay and
Broughton Streets. Exactly two seconds later she found herself prone
and quite prostrate in the gutter of
the aforementioned streets. No, gentle
reader, she had not been Imbibing
too freely—nor had she slipped on a
rotten egg—nor had her companion
placed a basket bomb in the Gourre
pocket.   She had been struck. And
struck forcibly.
Could It have been an Austin? No
—a whole finger waa broken! That
eliminated the Austin. Light was shed
on the mystery when an apologetic
truck driver bravely stepped forth
and confessed all, to the horror and
amazement of three kids, a street car
conductor who was busy replacing a
trolley and two young men who were
in no condition to appreciate the confession anyway. After due deliberation, expenses were paid and the discussion ended.
Thus two Varsity students have bit
the dust in as many weeks. Both were
of the weaker sex. Miss Gourre was
compensated with a new pair of
stockings, a new dress, a slightly used
finger, and this yarn, which wouldn't
even compensate a person with a
broken.neck!
NOTICE
By Act of Parliament of Canada, Armistice Day, November
11th, has been proclaimed a
Public Holiday. The University
will be closed, therefore, on
Wednesday, November 11, 1931.
Please note that the University will be in session on Saturday, November 7th, and Monday, November Oth.
L. S. KLINCK,
President.
«-
Newt & Views
Of Other U's
MYTH W llflSBUS
ft THOTH THEME
V "      'I   " "    "
"Top milk of the Homecoming theatre night bottle will be
the Royal Egyptian Ballet of tho Society of Thoth," state Marjorie and Rod Pilkington, co-directors of tills year's pantomine.
"Rehearsals have been under Way for some time and the
performance is fast rounding into shape," is the opinion Art
McCulloch gave when,interviewed about the Ballet. So far,
five rehearsals have been hold.
Ite._. Magaloff, pTwad^mat,,   VrtfttmSH^Ximsm Qrand
■ 'il '■ Hi iri j-fci j-_°t ■ . Ai ..   . ••£ _     .a "\ *«   *.* * i *     1
Scribe of the society, has .promised to
attend some of the rehearsals and give
the benefit of sixteen years experi-
In. producing plays with the
Players Club. He advises those who
intend to witness the Ballet thi.
year to read up on the story of Theseus and the Minotaur if they intend
to get the full benefit of the anachronisms and subtleties which are
always incorporated into the skit.
Classical Story Is Theme
An outline of the plot as given by
St. John Madeley follows: King Minos
ot Crete had defeated Athens in battle I
i,
human. .< an indemnity to pacify a
Minotaur which had been terrorising them for some time. Theseus, a
prince of Athens, decides to rid his
native city of tills terrible domination, so he Joins th. group of sacrifices. Upon thai* arrival at Crate,
Ariadne, daughter of Minos, falls in
love with Theseus gnd releases him
from the sacrifices, and he invades the
labyrinth where the foul beast lives.
He manages to kill the dragon and
thus frees Crete from its domination,
wins the gratitude of King Minos, and
the undying devotion of Ariadne.
Washington U. features a new idea
in editorials: short and snappy. Here
Is an example of them:
WHEN DO ¥OU JJE?
What Is your tost of truth? The
soul-stifling pace of modern competition makes an absolute <rtandard of
honesty a handicap. Ask any student
body publicity director.
BITTER EFFECTS
The depression has hit the college
students all over tile country. Five
hundred at th. University of West
Virginia had to leave because two
banks failed in Morgan town	
Two colleges In the Middle Wert have
accepted farm produce in lieu of tuition fee. because students could pay
In no other way. At Morriss Harvey
College one student turned in the following in payment for a year's tuition: One two-year-old beef steer,
dressed and ready for cooking, thirty
bushels of Grimes golden apples and
other small contributions. . . . Luther
College in Fergus Falls, Minn., accepted for fall tuition fees wheat that
students raised during the summer.
NEW MONEY
Designed to stimulate $15,000 worth
of business in Penn State University,
'prosperity checks" are released for
a fixed circulation. They are of $5
denomination and after thirty endorsements may be cashed and the
amount withdrawn from the account
of the issuer. Local banks recognize
them as legal tender and the local
merchants have promised to honor
and spend them. This will be a check
on the amount of business and will
tend to keep it within the locality of
tho college.
C. P. R. Offers
Lower Fares
For Xmai
Dates and conditions of the cheap
fares applicable on both Canadian
National and Canadian Pacific Railways, for student, travailing at
Christmas time, are announced In a
letter to the Ubyssey from the office
of the latter company.
Tickets may be issued to student*
on presentation of Canadian Passenger Associalon Vacation Certificates,
at fare and one-quarter for the round
trip. These certificates may be secured
from the secretary of the Canadian
Passenger Association, Mr. A. M.
Parker, Room 320, Union Station, Winnipeg, Manitoba. The certificates
should be signed by President Klinck
or the Dean of the faculty in which
the student is registered. Tickets will
be sold on presentation of these certificates not more than three days prior to, nor three days later than, the
closing date of the University, which
should be shown on the face of the
certificate. As announced in the calendar this date is December 17th.
Tickets will be void after the opening date of the spring term, January
4th in the case of U.B.C. In no case
will tickets be issued before December 1st, 1931, or be good for return
later than January 31st, 1932.
It is expected that a large number
of students will take advantage of the
cheap rates which are being offered
this year for the* first time.
HOT FEET
Three lettermen and a first-string
quarterback are out of the game for
the rest of th season at Fort Hayes
College because a looker room attendant bathed their feet in carbolic acid,
mistaking it for tannic acid.
Student   Forum
Will Debate
Cremation
Prof. J. P. Day will be speaker at
the first meeting of the Parliamentary
Forum to be on Tuesday, November
3rd at 7:30 in Arts 100.
The subject under discussion for the
initial meeting of the Forum will be
"Resolved that this house prefers cremation to burial." The Parliamentary
Forum will be conducted in accordance with regular Parliamentary proceedings, the house being divided
into Government and Opposition. Each
side will have a Party Council consisting of three. The main speaker for
each side will be allowed ten min-
ues for his speech, all others three
minutes.
The Party Council is appointed by
the retiring council, and for the first
two meetings will consist of Russ
Shaneman, Sid Semple and Innes McDougall for the Government, and
Sonny Nemetz, Paul Campbell and Ed
Stenner for the Opposition.
All students, men and women, are
invited to attend, and those interested
in debating should take note that the
intercollegiate debaters will be chosen from members of the Forum.
Full Program
Is Announced
For Concert
Continuing a series of musical performances to be held this fall, tiie
Musical Society will present another
noon-hour recital in tiie Auditorium
on Thursday, November 8,
The program as announced by Mr.
Williams, the conductor, is as follows:
1. Aria: "Now Joan Ardently-"
from "La Mort de Jeanne d'Arc" (O.
Bemberg); Isobel Oartshore. At the
piano, Isabel F. Campbell.
3. Second Suit, for Two Pianos
(Rachmaninoff), Alia Marda, Valse,
Romance, Tarantella. Vera bigs and
Isabel F. Campbell.
3. tonga: (a) Psyche (Paladlhl.); (b)
Serenade (Poldowski)j (c) Love Went
A-rldlng (Frank Bridge). Isobel Oartshore.
Note: Owing to the length ot thi
program there will be, no encores.
Those attending the recital are requested to be in their stats by 13:10
o'clock sharp.
S.C.M. Discusses
Relation of Christ
To Modern
Dr. O.M. Shrum was elected, president at the organisation meeting of
ihe Vancouver Branch of iaj Royal
Astronomical Society of Canada.
H. C. B. Forsyth was chMsn secretary, and O. L. Bennett, treasurer.
M. A. Kelk, Mrs. C. M Robson, F.R.
Williams, T. J. McGill, J. A. McKenzie, J. A. Pflman and A .Outrun.
Many professors, students and citizens have already Joined the Society. A knowledge of astronomy Is
not needed for membership. Branches are being organized in the chief
cities of Canada.
The next meeting will be held on
November 10, in Applied Science 200
at 8:15. The speaker will be Dean
Buchanan, honorary president of the
Vancouver branch.
Assembling for theb1 only week-end
camp before Christmas, thirty members of the S.C.M. met at the Y.W.C.A.
camp, Copper Gove, to discuss relationship, between Christianity and
modern society.
Opening the morning study-group
Mr. Brooks asked if there is suoh a
thing as tiie will of Ood socially, and
whither we can find it Is the production of high olass individuals the
chief aim of life? Is the benefit for
the individual advantageous for society as a whole? Nietzsche, a great
German philosopher, taught that one
super man waa worth the sacrifice of
any number of leaser people, put
Christ's doctrine off seta this theory.
In His mind the individual la of reel
Worth, and to emphasize this idea He
•les the oriental family with Its pat-
rlarchial head as the ideal state of
society. The central thought behind
the mstnutiwrfsuch a-family group
is the idea of "one for all and all for
one." Ood has equal regard for every
member ef society, and the strong
must not Impose upon the weak. In
the modem world we see many ideaa
conflicting with that of a universal
(Please turn to Page Two)
r
LEADING ROLES
TO BE DECIDED
FOR "PINAFORE"
Within a week or ten days the
tryouts will start for the principal
parts in "H.M.S. Pinafore," which
will be staged about the end of February by the members of the Musical Society.
Rehearsals for the choruses are already in full swing. An early start
was made this year hi this work In
order to avoid the usual rush Just
before the production.
Among the eight principal parts
for the men are those of Sir Joseph
Porter, the First Lord of the Admiralty; Capt. Corcoran, the Commander
of the H. M. S. Pinafore, and Ralph
Rackstraw and Dick Deadeye, tiie
able-seamen.
Among the parts for the women
are those of Josephine, the Captain's
daughter, and Mrs. Cripps, known to
all as "Little Buttercup," a Portsmouth Bumboat Woman. Members
of the Society are advised to watch
the notice boards closely for the
dates.
COMING EVENTS
Today:
Parliamentary   Forum,   Arts
100, 7:30 p.m.
S.C.M., Aggie 100, noon.
Track Meet, Howeshow Bldg.,
Hastings Park, 8:00 p.m.
Wednesday, Nov. 4th,
Arts '34 Draw, Arts 100, noon.
Arts '33 Draw, App. Sc. 100,
noon.
Law Club, Aud. 312, 8:00 p.m.
Campus Exposed
To Epidemic
A Third Year Applied Science student has developed measles. The rash
appeared Wednesday, October 28, 1931.
The diagnosis was made and he waa
sent to hospital Thursday, October
29, 1931.
All students or others associating
with him from Saturday, October 24th,
to Thursday, October 29th, whether
in clam, at cafeteria, at home, or
otherwise, were exposed to the chance
of Infection from him.
Thc very first symptoms of measles
appear about four days before the
rash. They at first resemble the symptoms of a cold, with fever, Hence
anyone developing symptoms of a
cold at home should remain there
and   notify   the   University   Health
BEST REPORT CHOSEN
"Archie Thompson, Arts '35, is the
first winner of the Weekly Reporters'
Competition," announces the editorial staff of the Ubyssey.
The winning report was one published in the isue of the 23rd of October under the head Danish Gymnast
Troupe Embodies Unique Features.
Although this was not by any means
the best published it was the best one
written by a reporter without assistance.
Margaret Little was runner up with
her report published In the same issue
under the caption "Fall Congregation
Meets Wed., Oct. 28th."
Service by phone at once (Point Grey
1191). If such symptoms appear while
on the Campus, go at once to the University Health Service, 306 Auditorium Building.
Please cooperate with the University
Health Service In order to prevent an
epidemic, with consequent great loss
of time to students.
Per order,
University Health Service.
Student Leaden Offer Favorable Opinions On
Conference Representation Plot
■_-_>«-W_MM-«IM-H«WM-elV-M-
Eight hundred signatures have been secured by the Stu*
dents' Petition Committee in five days of vigorous campaigning.
Leaders of the movement expect another seven hundred students will sign the petition, which concerns Canadian repra*
sentation at the Geneva Disarmament Conference.  The signet!'
forms will be sent to headquarters at McGill University witBlaT
a week and from there they will be sent to Premier Bennett jnf*r
Ottawa. ,
f The enterprise, in which practically
all the Canadian Universities are taking a part, ia officially supported on
this campus by th. Students' Council. -
"I am wholeheartedly in favor of
the petition," declare. Earl Venes,
president of the A.M.S. "It is a worts*/
if fort for students to support. Cane*
dlan universities can make their !■_
flu.nce felt, and 1 think it is the i
step of its kind In this
Everyone should sign the petition IM
I cannot denounce too strongly these
who spoil the sheets by writing,****
th* trend of opinion favors the IgsaV
Uon project, according to the later-
views given by promlnwrt students,
onth.csmpui. Dorothy Myers, ffeV
Ident of th. Women's Undergrad,4s.
ol.ty, says, "Speaking for the wot**
of th. university, I feel sure that Wi'
are all ln favor of the petition SfJl
wlUglv.lt our support"
"Becaus. it Is a national entered**
it will hav. seme lnfluenw, alfeeug*
that may be Indirect," stated Jsdt
rhomson, president of M.U.S, "JtvV
dent opinion i. becoming mere and
more recognised as something ghat
should not be overlooked," he ***
on to say.
-.    -        A Vital Question
declares, "Tho petition to the Prime
Minister is a good project, and h is
fitting that is should come from the
universities."
"Even if the petition didn't got anywhere, it's well to know the opinion
of the students on such an important
question," is th. statement made by
Ken Beckett, Arts '32. ,
Clare Donaldson, Sc. 34, newly appointed Junior Member for Students'
Council, believes that the students In
petitioning for representatives who
are not politicians are expressing.
their judgment on one of the most
vital questions concerning representation at the disarmament parley.
Mary Fallis, secretary of the Letters
Club, expressed herself as heartily -in
favor of the petition. "Every^opportunity the students can take to bend
together in united action towards disarmament is all to tiie good," she said.
Sidney Sample, Arts '82, emphatl-
cally  declares, "I believ. that the
petition should receive the hearty endorsement of every student"
Petition Will Get Conridcraticn
Jack Ruttan, president, of Arte '38,
in speaking of the possible Influence
the formal request will have on the
Prime Minister's choice of rapressn-
tatlves, states, "Mr. Bennett, I believe,
is a conscientious man and will seriously consider the request made by
the students of Canada."
Varsity Pep Club
Seeks Members
Under the leadership of President
Ken Stewart, the Pep Club held a
yell and song practice in tiie Auditorium, Friday noon.
The large number of members present was augmented by many Interested onlookers who joined in the
songs, among which were "Hall
U.B.C." and "Boola."
Sydney Aqua and Lyle Stewart,
who are trying out for the position
of assistant yell leader, were given
practice in cheer leading.
"The campaign for hew member, is
progressing favourably," said Gordon
Hilker, secretary, "but there is still
room for more." He stated that eight
committees had been selected for
various tasks such as announcing
meetings, and staging contests. Further details of this nature will be announced later. Malcolm Pretty accompanied the songs.
Wing Development Traced
In Insects and Animals
"Wings," was the topic discussed
by Professor E. J. Spencer at a
meeting of the Biological Discussion
Club held at the home of Mrs. C.
McLean Fraser, Monday evening,
October 19.
Professor Spencer traced the history of flight amongst animals from
the pre-paleozoic epoch to the present day. Wings are first known to
have existed on Insects on which
they took the form of flat lateral
extensions of the body. These insects were called "Trilobltes" and it
is thought that they gave rise to
some of the modern aquatic insects.
After millions of years there appeared perfect insects possessed of
the power of flight. The wings of
these types probably originated from
external gills or from laternal extensions of the earliest form. Certain it is that the wings developed
both externally and internally so
that now there are blood vessels and
trachea ln the wings.
Some Animals Flew
The development of flight In vertebrates followed the same advance
In Insects. From a study of fossils
it is known that there once were
flying animals. The Mesosoir dragon was small bodied but it had a
pair of wings, formed of naked skin,
which measured 25 feet from tip to
tip. Some reptiles also developed
wings but today there is only one
such form, the Draco, which glides
on costal membranes.
Near relatives of the reptiles, the
birds, have evolved the most suc-
cesful form of wings, the use of
feathers being the important feature.
The Human Urge to Fly
Winged mammals are few in number and the few are chiefly nocturnal.
Flying squirrels glide downward by
means of a membrane between limbs
and a flat tail. Bats have perfect
wings utilizing a membrane which
may or may not enclose the tall.
The only wings which man has so
far developed are mechanical, although he has often pictured himself
as possessing a means of flight. The
mention of wings occurs ln Biblical
history time and again, human beings equipped with winas. fearsome
creatures of prophecy or destruction
and even winged horses.
In concluding his paper Professor
Spencer suggested that: "Human beings in the past and legions now
living are convinced that angels exist and many are quite sure that
they themselves will eventually
grow, or at least become equipped
with these theoretically impossible
structures."
A r
?—*
Page Two
THE    UBYSSEY
Tuesday, November 3, 1931
Ss-k'
ftlrp liinjaanj
(Member, of Pacific Inter-Collegiate Press Association)
_   Issued every Tuesday and Friday by the Student
Publication Board of the University of British Columbia,
West Point Grey
PHONE PT. GREY 138
Mall Subscription rate: 83 per year
Advertising rates on application.
EDITOR-iN-CHlEF-Wilfred Lee
SENIOR EDITORS
Tuesday Issue: Malrl Dingwall
Friday Issue: Frances Lucas ■
ipprt Editor: E. King.       Seature Editor: E. J. Costain
Associate Editors! Mollle Jordan, Rosemary Winslow
Literary Editor: Michael Freeman
Exchange Editor: Nathan Nemetz
mm • Columnist: R. Grantham
News Manager: St. John Medeley
Assistant Editors: Tom How, Norman Hacking
Sidney Aqua
_ Reportorial Staff
Pat Kerr, Arnold White, Bill Cameron, Day Washington
fad Denne, Stew Keate, Kay Crosby, Betty Gourre, Kim
Killan, Cella Lucas. Margaret Little, Laurel Rowntree,
Doug. Perkins, Virginia Cummlngs, Bob Harcourt Leona
Nelson, Kay Greenwood, Jim Miller, Archie Thomson.
Guy Palmer.
BUSINESS STAFF
Business Manager: Reg. Price
Advertising Manager: Nathan Nemetz
Circulation Manager: Murray Miller.
Assistants: Sam Llpson, Erie Benson, Brodle
-Eralshftejttt
,Ca*ooaitt! W. Tavender
AY, NOVEMBER 3, 1931
THE STUDENT PETITION
"The next disarmament conference must
succeed. If it fails—that is, if it does not ensure an honest and universal reduction in the
actual killing and wounding power of arms—
we shall see the downfall of our institutions
and the .end of Western civilizaton. Let me
repeat that disarmament must be honest, must
be mutual and must be universal. I appeal
to tha veterans of the Great War, to the youth
of the world, to see to it that your governments
determine on disarmament now, for there will
be no other chance."
These are tho solemn words of Sir Arthur
W> Currie, commander of the Canadian troops
in tha Great War, principal of McGill Univer-
Sir William Robertson, chief of tha Brl-
general staff In tha war and the only British private to become a field marshall,
expresses similar views on tha need for measures of disarmament and tha costly futility
of war. Wa could quote dotens of prominent
men of all nations to tho same effect.
That the Itudents of Canada art fully
alive to tha seriousness of tha situation is evidenced by tht petition they art going to present to Prima Minister Bennett, asking that
Canada bo represented by distinguished man
who are neither politicians nor professional
military exports, and that this country press
for significant reduction of armaments. It is
inspiring to witness the colleges and universities bf tha nation uniting in this movement.
From coast to coast students are rallying to
support tha petition, and tha University of
British Columbia will do its part. Council has
officially approved the plan and hundreds have
, a>a_dv signed the forms that are being made
available. In some universities the support
has boon almost one hundred per cent., it is
reported, and we should take second place to
none, but present an unanimous front.
ADVANCED MORALS
At the conclusion of last term the urgent
need for money to bring the Stadium Fund
up to the required total led to the evolution of
a plan to collect unused caution money. While
this scheme did not meet with the unqualified
approval of all those concerned the campaign
committee finally convinced the student body
that it was a feasible method by which much
of the essential balance could be realized*. At
an Alma Mater meeting, at which considerably
more than the necessary quorum were present,
a resolution assigning the caution money to
the Stadium Fund was passed by an ample
majority.
During the recent summer it was found that
In order to obtain the caution money it would
be necessary for students to tender individual
signatures reiterating their promise of last
term. Accordingly Students' Council arranged
for the distribution of forms, which, when
signed, would fulfill the necessary technicality.
What has been the result? To date only a
very small proportion of the money has been
signed over. Have some of the students lost
touch with affairs to such an extent that they
have not heard of this matter and so have failed
to sign? Are some of them so hard pressed
for time that they have been unable to slip
into the Bursar's office and. sign their names?
Can there be any of them so deplorably indifferent to the welfare of their own University
that they 'haven't bothered' to fulfill their
promise? Undoubtedly these causes account
for some of the money which has not been received. Regrettable as this may seem it pales
into insignificance when a further reason is revealed. A considerable number of students
have actually collected the money which had
been previously pledged to the Stadium Fund.
It would be a conservative estimate to say
that at the conclusion of last session ninety-
five percent, of the students then registered
believed that their caution money had been
legally transferred to the Stadium Fund. If
that were not the case why did they not collect it at the usual time last spring? A student who has withdrawn his 1930-31 caution
money, therefore, has taken advantage of a
legal technicality to obtain possession of money
which he believed to be the property of others.
Ethically this is theft for the money had not
been voluntarily released by the party to
whom it had been assigned.
In some stratas of society people who attempt to benefit themselves at the expense of
their own organization are branded as 'scabs'
and 'blacklegs.' At this institution of higher
education many of them boast of the 'smart
trick' which they have been able to effect- A
group of these student parasites would surely
be well qualified to lecture to the Freshman
class on "Advanced trends in University
Morals."
Another Indication of the decline of collegiate-Ism
was the subject of an editorial in th. Oregon Daily
Emerald a year ago. The editorial refer, to the lessening vocal support for teams at Ore-
Another County gon and Stanford, and concludes:
Heard From " 'Yelling,' as such, Is being more and
more relegated to the high schools,
which are infinitely more <Tcollegiate" In dress and
actions than any college ln the nation.
"When there Is co-operation in university undergraduates It is an emotional co-operation. It is not the
loud-mouthed variety."
*    *    * .
Returning to the discussion of conservative tendencies in the universities of this continent, I beg to report
certain hopeful signs in Canada. From some centres
the periodical walls about the degeneracy of
Hopeful debating arise, but I note activity at Mani-
Signs toba and McGill. At the former, 'Resolved
that Capitalism has failed' waa the subject
of a recent debate, and at the latter Disarmament was
discussed.
But the best indication of vitality is th. petition that
Canadian students are sending to the Prime Minister
about Canada's representatives at the February Disarmament Conference. The petition requests that our Influ-
enc. be exerted on behalf of significant reduction; it
asks that our delegates be neither professional military
men nor active politicians.
The Usually conservative McGill Dally Introduces its
article on the petition with a atreamer. In a full column
editorial on the matter, the Queen'. Journal declares
that "Throughout Canada, a student movement of tremendous proportions is under way. World Peace Is the
ultimate objective of the students at Canadian colleges
and universities from coast to coast" The present objective, It goes on to say, is to petition the Prime Minister
that Canada ho represented at the Disarmament Confer
ence not by active politicians
served thilr country
ut by "two who have
whose presence
would both give weight to Canadian representations and
reflect the serious thought of our best citizens."
It is right and proper that the students of the country
should make, their wishes known on such an important
matter, University people should take a greater, and
mole active interest In the welfare of the country and
*   e   e
The Daily Province report, that at the Congress of
Universities of the Empire meeting recently in Edinburgh, delegates were almost unanimous that "It la
either desirable
t
CLASS AND CLUB NOTES
INTERNATIONAL RELATIONS
CLUB
Th.ro will be an International Relations Club Meeting on Wednesday,
Nov. < at 8:00 p.m. at the nome of
Dean Bollert, 1185 West 10th.. Mr. Fallis will speak on "Impressions of
Europe."
PHYSICS CLUB
; A joint meeting of the Physics and
Radio Clubs will be held in Sc. 200 on
Wednesday at 3:13 p.m.
Wilbert Smith will demonstrate and
explain a Western Electric Public Address Amplifier.
ARTS'38
A committee meeting will be held
Wednesday, November 4, Arts 108.
A class meeting was held at noon
on Friday. A skit committee was
formed and a class committee appointed, composed of Misses Webster and
Stoker, Mr. Crocker, Mr. Dltmsrs and
Mr. Castleton. Mr. Sargent will be advertising manager.
tic
toprovideuniversity educationfor allwho
ft-,1*"-
lucation     may
I am glad of tho 'almost.'
Ion means that it Is neither desirable npr physioaiiy pee-
_S_ma»^t&w%_s
student scribe though I be, most heartily disagree with
the learned gentlemen who supported that view.
The word 'desirable' is rather strange—it sugg
opinion of those who think that toe much is M
in the way, of .nUghtaning 'the lower cUsses.1 .
 da, except for some recent arrivals from Britain
or Britons who will never become Nortii Americanised,
and except for a few of our dtlsens who have more
money than Is good for them, we recognise no social
BIG BLOCK CLUB
The Big Block Club had their first
monthly luncheon at' ihe Anglican
College, Oct. 30. Colonel'Wilken waa
the guest of honor, and gave a short
speech in which he mentioned the de-
slrabiity of an athletic as well as a
scholastic side to campus, life.
There followed some discussion on
the future activities of the Club, and
Art Mercer and Howie Cleveland were
delegated to make arrangements for]
a tea dance to bo held in the near
future. , |
A feature of the luncheon was the
presentation to Frank Alpen of his
Big Block sweater, by Oavln Dirom. i
NOTICE
Several students living In Rossland,
Trail, or Nelson, can share the expenses of the trip, heme by getting In
touch with R. Cliff Sangsted, lay.
TSS at I p.m.
1
A. I. E. E.
There will be a meeting of the
Student branch of the A.I.E.S.E. at
7:30 p.m. Tuesday evening, November
3. in Mech. Eng. 109. J. W. McRae
will give a paper on "Hot Cathode
Discharge Tubes" and A. Barnes will
speak on "Automatic Smoke Testers."
Two moving pictures, "The Wizardy
of Wireless," and "The Making of
Mazda Lamps" will be shown during
the evening. All who are interested
in Electrical Engineering are invited
to attend.
V. c. u.
Dr. A. Esler is to be the speaker at
the meeting of the Varsity Christian
Union on Wednesday, Nov. 4, at 12:05,
in Arts 204. He comes to Us from the
Robertson Presbyterian Church and is
known to many on the campus. The
speaker will take as his subject, "Prophet Daniel's Message to the Students
of Today," and all Interested are
urged to come and hear what should
prove to be both highly Interesting
and helpful
FOREST CLUB
Forest Club meeting Tuesday noon,
Nov. 3, in Ap. Sc. 101. Mr. J. H. Jenkins of the Dominion Forest Products
Lab. will speak on "Sawmill Wast,
and Ita Utilisation." All interested
welcome. Lantern slides.
it is very deslnbie Indeed that educational Institutions
toping democracy, and
,. ._   ery desirable indeed that educational instiu '
be open to all who can meat reasonable standards.
As for the physical Impossibility, that must be remedied
wherever it exists. I suppose that twenty-five years ago
people little thought that secondary education would
reach Its present stage of development.
It has come to thle-and quite rightly so-4hat the
primary purpose of state univerritiee I. to provide opportunity for students, to broaden their knowledge, develop mentally and physically, and learn how to live
aa self-educating, Intelligent citizens. The institution
of Junior Colleges and tne granting of Sophomore degree, are two Innovations that are being tried In some
American centres to meet the situation. The honors
courts and the private university of more than average
standing are the jplaces for scholars and research work-
are
Jewish
Students
centres to meet the situation.
i
era, For those who take neither honors nor professional
courses, the pass course should provide a liberal education, equipping them to live their Uvea aa fully aa
Discussion of race questions has been going on ln
The Manitoban and The Varsity. At Toronto the Jews
in the limelight Considering overcrowding and
"the prejudice that at present exists/' The
Varsity suggests a Jewish College to give
Jews freedom and scope, and an added
prestige in recognition of Jewish literature,
culture and religion that might become acceptance. "In
the light, however, of the recent French Invective (in a
Montreal anti-semetic paper, advocating barring ot Jews
from universities) and also of certain bigoted actions ln
McGill University, our motive would be suspect. We
should be accused of attempting to lure the Jewish students into one body, in order to take the next step of
evicting them with much greater facility."
I don't know what the Jewish point of view on this
is, but it seems to me that the formation of separate
Jewish colleges would be a mistake. Let the Jews preserve whatever of their religion and culture they value,
but be primarily Canadian citizens and not a community
within the community.
Whatever prejudice exists against Jews at Toronto
and McGill redounds to the discredit of those Institutions. The only nrejudlce against Jews at the University of British Columbia that I know of is the bar In
some 'fraternities' against those of other than Nordic
stock. Otherwise, they take part ln all student activities
as fellow students, which is as It should be.
I conclude with the words of The Manitoban'a editorial on the Negro problem: "And university students,
as a class, should be first to acknowledge that man
must be evaluated not on his racial connection but on
the quality of his personality."
UNSUNG HEROES
A despatch from Vienna in the daily press
tells us that "Dr. Guido Holzknecht, chief of
the X-ray Institute in Vienna, and one of the
world's leading authorities in this field, died
here Friday, a martyr to science." Dr. Holzknecht was experimenting with an X-ray cure
for cancer. He lost one arm after three operations but refused to give up work which
seemed on the point of success. He died after
amputation of his second arm.
The terrible effects of the X-ray on experimenters were brought to the attention of
the world last year when Dr. Christian Deet-
jen of Baltimore suffered the loss of an arm
after some previous operations. Dr. Frederick
H. Baetjer of John Hopkins Medical School,
it was announced, has been under the knife
seventy-five times- Many others have been
killed or disabled in X-ray work, for they
considered progress in this field more important than their own lives.
Other fields of medical and scientific research have their martyrs too, although the
public hears but little of them. Let a man
make a name for himself as the efficient butcher in the savagery of insane war, and he
will be presented to generations of school
children with a halo of glory round his head.
But men like Dr. Guido Holzknecht, who met
a horrible death in his effort to win the dramatic battle of science against the scourge of cancer—let such men fall at the post of duty, and,
if the world hears of them at all in brief newspaper reports, they are soon forgotten by all
except their co-workers.
Let us hold in honor men who strive to
benefit humanity; let us remember them with
reverence and gratitude.
ABU IS
To give students an extra day to pay
fees, the Arts '81 Class Draw has been
postponed from Tuesday, November 8,
to Wednesday, November 4. Pay your
fees today. You still have a chance
to enter the draw. It will be hold In
Applied Science 100.
LOST
Black and white, Parker Duofold
pen, Finder please return to Jean
Smith, Arte '34, or the Bookstore.
L'ALOUETTE
The next meeting of "L'Alouette"
will be held Nov. 10, at th. horn, of
Miss Vera Scott, 6041 Cypres. Street
•i_-ea»«a«e--_e__ss»*__B_s__a»
ARTS -
At a meeting of Arts '35 Thursday
noon in Arts 100, it waa decided to
hold the clas party after Christmas.
Nominations for officers were taken.
A MATTER OF TASTE?
.,. Winchesters, of course'
20ro*25Ci,,T•
CI OAR
Blended Rieht!
LOST
Gold and black fraternity pin, Pi
Kappa. Finder please r^turnJo Bookstore.
We read an article in the city paper the other morning that took our
mind for a moment—only for a moment, note—from an occupation that
command, the attention of a good
many people about U.B.C. these
days-meed we say we refer to Essay-Writing. However, our mind refused to stay with the particular essay in hand but would return to the
newspaper article rfgaln and again,
until, just as we despaired of accomplishing anything, in came Ulysses—and our worst fears were realized. We knew that for the time
being we might as well talk and
listen.
You may not be aware of Ulysses'
predlliction for the gentle are of
conversation, but to us who have to
live with him, the visit suggested
unlimited talk, and we nimbly
switched him on to that distressing
article referred to. "What of the
Welfare Drive?" This was the problem—was it to fall, and why? Some
one had said—"They have found out
that the money simply isn't around
this year." This did not seem an
adequate explanation, since other
cities have succeeded where Vancouver has failed.
Ulysses agreed that individuals and
groups hadn't realized the obligation
that rests upon them. The obvious
advantages of the system of Welfare
Federation were not in question, but
rather the duty of all classes of citizens In respect to the Drive. Agamemnon, who had entered during the
preliminary skirmish, suggested rather hesitatingly that University students might be considered a class of
citizens. We could understand his
hesitation- Ihe thought was novel,
and has not often been advanced on
Campus. Citizens? "Just imagine
the absurdity of it." "My dear Ag-
amemnon, you will next be suggesting that we rest under the obligation
of citizenship." Ulysses, who had
been pondering, said "Perhaps we
do," and all three of us found ourselves faced with the possibility of
the students of U.B.C. being considered as citizens, and as such under
the obligations of a group toward
the Welfare Federation Drive.
PHILOSOPHY CLUB
,The Philosophy Discussion Olub met
at the home of Dr. and Mrs. H. T. J.
Coleman on October St, 1011. Mr.
George Kell.t read a paper on "The
Decline of Western Civilisation." Mr.
Kellett gave a clear and concise presentation of Oswald Spengler's book,
The Decline of th. West" This was
followed by an animated discussion.
LOST
Blaok loose-leaf notebook, on Wednesday. Finder please return to H.
Mellish, or the Bookstore.
ME AND MY SYMBOLS AND HER
You and I, woman,
And a perspiring elephant
Waterlogged on the Sahara.
That is how the world goes
(Sometimes).
You and I, ducky,
And a jumping-jack rabbit
Zizzy, Zizzy, Zumpy!
'Neath the prairie moon's
Green  cheese.
You and I, lady,
And  a  corn-perplexed  centipede
Walking round an unlimited
world
(And tomorrow DIDN'T come
YESTERDAY).
And that Is how the world goes,
Not just as it used to go,
But that is how the world goes
now
For T. S. ELIOT
(and sometimes—Ulysses).
*w*	
On Invasion
(Continued from Page One)
taking part in the annual migration.
He suk) pointed out that competition
had been very keen in the past and
that on one occasion Varsity's teams
had only won one event
Coed Opinion Divided
"For this year, at any rate,-it Is too
expensive—students can't afford it,"
said Esme Thompson. "It's a good
Idea," stated Nancy Carter, "and If
they don't like student behavior, get
more chaperones!" was her idea of
a remedy for th. alleged condition of
student rowdlness in the Capital city.
Several co-eds who preferred to remain anonymous had quite definite
opinions on the matter. "I've been
two years, and I don't think it's any
good—the boys are completely soused,
so the girls never have any fun," says
one, while another is of the opinion
that "It's loads of fun. but the public
doesn't like it, and the whole University opinion is against it, so it ought
to be stopped!"
Victoria students gave an interesting light to the question. Dolly Smith
stressed the fact that "If we don't
have an invasion, there's no point in
Victoria College being affiliated with
Varsity." Ann Hartley thought "It's
a good thing for the teams to meet—
and the reduced fares give many students an opportunity to have a holiday that they could not otherwise afford."
LOST
Kappa Alpha Theta Sorority pin.
Finder please notify Katharine Lee.
ALLAN'S
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first Class Shoe slepalrlng
SWwS)w   wRstwa^BYeeam i flsf SPeWsp
4129 10th Avenue West
CAT
For your next party don't forget to cail Winifred's
about Prices
Winnifred's Lunch
(Opposite Hotel Vancouver)
7A.M.-12P.M.
"h  t feU-...-f"    Vi/-^>Wt'
HANDBOOKS (This Year's)
TOTEMS (Last Year's)
NOW ON SALE
BUSINESS OFFICE
Room 303 Auditorium
S.C.M. Discusses
Modern Religion
(Continued from Page One)
family.  Nevertheless God's will seems
to be that we should strive to realize
such a state of society.
During the afternoon session the relationship between Chris! and modern
social systems was discussed. Although
Jesus did not object to the evils of
the theocratic system of his day, we
must not suppose that He would leave
our own society uncritlclzed. As a
matter of fact we have little of His
teaching. He gives us no actual code
of ethics—simply a number of precepts uttered from time to time which
we should strive to Interpret for ourselves. For this reason we are apt to
become complacent, not realizing that
in this day and age Jesus expects us
to carry forward to its logical conclusion the principle for which He
lived and died—namely that God's
will is the dominant force behind
the world.
In closing the discussion, Mr. Brooks
reminded members of the group that
as students they should ever uphold
the idea that Jesus is alive today.
"Nothing seems more important than
the revival of this thought, for If
Christ lives, there will be a new heaven and a new earth," concluded Mr.
Brooks.
University Book Store
Hours: 9 a.m. to S p.m.; Saturdays, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.
Loose-Leaf Note Books, Exercise Books and Scribblers
at Reduced Prices
Graphic and Engineering Paper, Biology Paper.
Loose-Leaf Refills, Fountain Pens and Ink.
Pencil and Drawing Instruments.
Crepe Paper for Masquerades, etc.
ALL YOUR BOOK SUPPLIES SOLD HERE
TV
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TOUR HOME ... with its precious contents...
your loved ones... your valuables... deserves
the utmost in protection.
Light, cheap and plentiful, offers maximum protection
for a few cents a day. Then, again, your home will be
brighter and cheerier, more charming by night than
by day
For a single cent, at Vancouver's low "two-cent rate,"
a 40-watt lamp provides illumination for twelve and
a half hours.
Little motors and one cent's worth of electricity also
assist the housewife with household tasks. Cleaning,
washing, ironing . . . duties that once required hours
but with cheap electricity, ever ready to serve, now
take only minutes.
Electricity Is Cheap .. . Use It Freely
B.C.Slectric
Swvtng British Columbia
BRITISH   COLUMBIA  ELECTRIC   RAILWAY CO. a--^-r^-y n'- ^ ^40J|^4^^XU^^.j^^r^Li^aJ^%), ^ U.J Aiu,^, -.^^ ..ji,   y/^j,,.^ .^...^i^^j^^w^i^
1 '
Tuesday, November 3,1981
THE   UBYSSEY
Page TfcMf
ATTENTION!
Contributions to this page
may be left in the
PUBLICATIONS
OFFICE
ROOM 206
AUDITORIUM
Explanatory Note
During the progress of the publication of this serial, one of the instalments was lost. However, this
only serves to make the story more
mysterious. We, ourselves, forget
how the instalment read, so It's up
to you Dear Reader. Here'a tha
final Instalment.
(Conclusion)
Balked of our main capture, we
turned and confronted the printing
apparatus before us. At one side of
the machine stood a high stack of
plates, each one bearing the exact
Impression of a different page of the
V. B. C. Handbook. On the other
side lay a scattered heap of lnoom-
"Forgery!" gasped Cochoie and
Rants simultaneously. Then Emile
continued to speak alone."
"Evidently Chang Suey hu bean
working here for some time," he
ruminated. "Probably he has honeycombed the whole campus with these
underground passages, so it's no use
trying to pursue Kin."
"Yea," agreed Rants." "The fellow
is uncanny in his foresight'
During all this speechifying I had
■j-roWO     ^P/gjsaeajBTJwSiwH    '••ejWWejWe       "'pSW       eV^-sWg S| _
Boklna at things and nreasuu but-
tons to see what they ware for. No
apajFesjae-*a     e*psaj^sj ^  efa^ajaafpar    weje^eeaee^-ai l ^aajer^eenwe^ea-e^Bj
than, I pressed one of three buttons
^waao^pea    •Tc^a^HP^i- asegyej:   ewe    sjg    e^osessasje  ..ejjaflpepsjjs i
panel immediately a. pair of folding
-stall »hot down from the roof. Am-
ased, 1 pressed tht second button.
At the top of the stairs a trap-door
opened.
With a shout of surprise Bants and
Cochos started to climb the stairs!
Automatically | pressed in third
button. With the click of the button the stairs folded up again, the
trap-door shut with a dang, and
two very surprised sleuths descended
to Hat ground in a manner more
swift than their assent.'
"Cumsl" snarled Rantl. "Bring
those stairs down Here again you idiot, and next tuna don't press too
many buttons,"
With tills speech of Rants' the
story practically ends. The stairway
led to the Caf., where we had first
heard the noise of the printing-
press. Rente and Cochols were the
heroes o fthe hour. A special Alma
Mater Meeting was called to decide
the manner of rewarding the great
men, but as there was no quorum,
nothing was done. However, Emile
Cdchols was presented with the honorary degree of B.A.C. that Christmas, while Rants received a complimentary Handbook and a bottle of
olives. The bottle of olives being
given ln place of a wreath of olives,
as they were cheaper.
As for myself, I was the recipient
ef a Black-Hand letter warning me
to leave U. B. C. within eight years,
and bearing the awful signature of
Chang Suey.
Beneath the arch-demon's name
was a warning, brief but unmlstake-
ably true, as I was to discover to
my horror. It contained but three
words and these words were,
"I WILL'BETURN."
THE END
McCulloch:  "Have you heard my
new song, "Monocle Bill the Sailor?"
Prink I. Iwoombt
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CO-CO NUTS
BY "(»■(»"
Meaning By Our Conospondlng
Columnist
Having managed to get the editor-
person out of the way for a few
minutes, I shall try and answer a
few of the many questions that come
pouring ui on me every matt.
"Dear Mr. Co-Co:
How long is it necessary to know
a Wy before one 'can ask him to the
Co-ed? Ha is a Sclenceman, and has
the trickiest mustache.- Also he be*
a car. lie says it has done sixty-
five thousand miles,
Vour's blushingly,
F. X. (Arts 35'
P. S. He borrowed 80c off me. Is
this nice of him?
Well, F. K., If I were you, I
wouldn't ask him. Never trust a
Sclenceman. It is very significant
that he borrowed 80c off you, talon
in conjunction with the fact that his
ear (?) has dene slxty-flvs thousand
miles. A dollar, maybe, but net the
peculiarly significant sum of exai
thirty cents. Do not trust him, or
his oar. As 1 said before, do not ask
eesjeee ?i^ee;,   ;sjs>eiw ■.- we^^s*^^»Svi;.    ■e^o^es^m' ^ ^ea>—t-,
deserving men around this University. I ntean to say, 1 am generally
around the Pub. at noon-hour.
* • •
"Dear Mr. Co-Coi
I am a physicist (for the benefit
of the iSrsehmen, may I interpolate
here that he' does not mean that be
is a pra-med), and I am having al
argument with another student as
to the amount of work necessary to
it a man completely down and out
Ithout giving either of Our opinions, would you please answer this
for us?
Yours for justloa, .
M. A. (Arts 33)
Raallx, I do get some of the very
simplest questions! And you a Ban*
tog^teoj Fie, flel It all depends on,
your experience and age. I have
found, by personal observation, that
exactly seven motions of the right
fore-arm it quite sufficient. I do not
doubt that this ia not the medium,
but it ia the record that I have observed with my own eyes.
On receipt of a stamped, self-addressed envelope I will mall you the
name of the brand Involved.
* • •
And here' we have a letter from
some Sclenceman trying to be witty.
"Dear Mr. Co-Co:
Can you toll me where has my
polygon?
Sc. 34
That's very simple; almost as simple as the last one. You will probably find your dead parrot if you
will look up the nearest geometree.
* • »
While not claiming to be an expert on bridge and Its problems, I
do know sufficient to answer the
odd question. And what odd questions I do get, to be sure! Ah met
sighed the villain as lie maaticulated
a piece of toast. Well, I print here
a letter I got recently on the subject of bridge.
"Dear Mr. Co-Co:
While playing bridge lately, I held
the mil life or
LOUS XIV
SOW KATE lit UNCI
By Zola Olbols Elbeselgneur
"J'alme
Tu almes
Ii alme
Nous almons
Vous almes
lis alment"-so sang D'
artognon as he hummed the little
French ditty and as be gave his nag
the knee and jogged hla way to Parte to see what he could see. When
suddenly he came upon a peasant
who was weeping by the roadside
in a hano^aroniaf. "Why .art weep
ing?" queried D'artogon. "Oh!" cried
the weeping peasant, "Burgundy has
unloosed the dogs of war and all is
chaos. "How much chaos?" asked
D'artogon. «&. about two-bits,"
said the serf who Immediately start-
ed to sell our hero a fine line of In-
dian Navajo blankets. But Our Hero
paid no attention and started his
horse again in low gear and swept
around the corner In a fine burst of
speed and dust. As he reached high
gear the passant moved on in remorse.
Farther on down the road and past
the bend our Here came to the little
town of Merehmelleaux Where the
pickings were soft for them as could
an lrni enufled Pacquemf inn and'
here he met an inn-keeper. "Holal"
said Darty. "line, thanks. How ate
you?" replied the innard. "Well,
that's enough of that," thought Dart*
ty. "By the by or buy wheat, long,
hew far is it to Paris," he quoth.
(From now anon the author will
dispense with quotation marks as
they are too hard to put in). Half
a league, naif a league, half a league
Onward said the inmate, making one
and a half leagues in au. Oh, well,
Darty thought, the man's dotty.
I say, the hero, our hero or who-
over's herojhe ^ said, I have soap:
provincial money here and pew will
I get it ohanged Into Parisian currency. At the current discount rates
the Inandout replied. Which count,
asked Dartmouth. The Count of
Nine .answered the other sot, not
being a bad sot at all. My, my, how
prolific said the third party who
turned out to be our Hero.
Dartongon journeyed on and came
upon another pheasant tolling in the
fields and as he toiled he Sang and
bs he sang he tolled, making things
rather confusing after ail since no
one could ever discover Whether he
sang because he tolled or tolled because he sang.
Quotes appear again to make
things a bit simpler after the melee
of conversation above. 'How far is
It to Paris," hloaed Darty. "Half a
league, halfa. . ." "Hey, stop," cried
the hero. "That's been in the story
already. There's no use going through
all again. "Okaye by me," said the
serf and he went on with his tolling and singing but did not know
which to start first/ and it dawned
him that he did not know why he
sang or why he toiled so he sat
down and began to weep.
Dartongon hurried off before he
was sued for whatever they sued
thirteen dubsT My'op^hent'must jfotln *&• **?* °* !*>«{• the 14th.
"Eat when <U' Like" at the
Varsity Tea Room
4605—10th Avenue West
Sandwiches 10c
Beef, Pork, Ham, Etc.
Pie or ice Cream Dessert  10c
Coffee, Tea or Milk  10c
Hot Lunches 25c and 35c
Dinners  40c
All Home Cooked and Prepared
To Order
have had a strong hand too, because
he went up to seven no trumps.
What should I have done in the circumstances?
Yours truly,
O. Y.
The conditions are, to say tiie
least, a little bit bewildering. But If
you are the kind of man, like myself, who never give up (I once
spent three hours trying to thread a
needle), I think the best thing to
do is to go eight clubs. It is, of
course, very irregular to go eight
of anything; In fact I should imagine
it Is against the rules. However, I
am rather hazy on that point. The
advantage of bidding eight is that
everybody will be so flabbergasted
that they will pass. Then you throw
your cards on the table with a
pleasant smile and claim a misdeal
on the grounds that you have fourteen cards. Make sure to throw them
face up, so that if any Doubting
Thomas counts them, you can claim
a re-deal anyway, for having your
cards face up. This is a very good
method for getting out of any bridge
dlficulty.
If the opponent, on the other hand,
goes eight spades, it is evident that
he is as determined as you are
(only, when you, are referring to
the Incident, call him stubborn) and
that the affair is going to last all
night. In this case, tell him it is
against the rules to go eight. If he
is one of those awkward cusses, and
points out that you yourself went
eight a minute ago, just tell him
pleasantly that he is a liar, or throw
a chair at him, If you can restrain
yourself, do so; next day insure him
heavily In your favor and push him
under a coal-truck. I wish I had
known of your prolem earlier. There
He jangled on with his sword
hanging by his side and slowly
choking to death. Let us take a few
minutes off now to take a look at
our hero. If you don't want to look
at our hero let's take off a tew minutes anyhow and charge it to the
overhead.
He rode along gaily and cut a
daschund figure on his horse. His
face was deeply lined and paragraphed. He wore a jersey, a mou-
cholr and a verdigris on his head.
He stood five feet thirteen Inches In
his stocking feet but was never able
to do that as he had no stockings
and thus could not be measured that
way. The other way he stood five
four.
That Is about enough of the hero.
He rode into Paris.
Entry scene:
The market was bustling and street
hawkers were selling their hawks.
Over the cobbled street carriages
dashed hither and hither, and dandles of the court of Loole strolled
by the store windows and talked
over the coming battle with Burgundy. Our hero rode to the palace
to make a date with the king to
down the odd glass of raspberry
juice since the king had once spoken to our hero's father saying, "Yon
man looks more than monkey than
man." This made the king a relation of our hero's father.     ,,
Next week: Dartongon meets Ath-
os, Bathos and Pathos. Be there for
the duel scene.
No one really knows how much fun there is to editing
a Muck-a-Muck page until he, or she, has tried it- Perhaps
the most amusing part of the process comes after the "Ubyssey" has been circulated. Just as a lark, some day, look at
the face of someone who is reading the Muck page. In that
face you will see every emotion portrayed except amusement.
Generally the expression Of the face is one of cynical disbelief. And then, of course, there are our educated friends,
who always laugh. And titan again there are our educated
friends who do not laugh.
But, speaking seriously, although such speech has no place
on this page, the average student rarely laughs aloud for joy
at the Muck page. Sometimes he, or she, chuckles, sometimes
giggles, but we have never known anyone to die of hysterics
over our beloved page, although tho Senior Editor for tha
Friday issue hu been known to go off the deep and in a series
of gurgling, gushing noises. Sut then she used to be Literary
Editor and therefore can appreciate good writing.
So, this issue, we're going to sneak .around tha campus
taking mental photographs of people reading our Pago, and'
if you're not laughing, . . . • . .....!
ft SIMM
& also mm
•r
Utters To fit Editor
II iiiiwiwiiMWi m Ii in—    ii i mi    ■ ——#  a«.—.im. in. ii mi   in  •mmmmm/k
Litany Coroner  I       Alleged Jokes    ]
»—_W—i III Him in Ill    II ■■ !!■_—■♦    4)l- II     III     ||    Hi   um    ll     ■ ■■—■—ul.
Editors resign,
Editors are appointed
This page
Ssbbj   wees ■
d on,
And on,
Until
The end
Of tha term.
for  ,
the Press    d ,
Must be served.
EXTRACT
•nU'VUtUSY1
A. &
This beautiful fragment was found
in manuscript form by our searchers
fare excavating on the alto of
old and once flourishing VJ.C.
think it well, Illustrates contemporary manners end speech of the
students, although naturally some of
the words are unintelligible except
to the trained slangologlst. We hope
shortly to find mere examples of
undergraduate talent In .tha twentieth century.
A BALLAD OF THE PUB
Ye Ed. sat In his swivel chair,
Chewing the blude-red pen,
"O whaur is a good reporter—
To write this page ye ken?"
Then up and spake a man so bold,
Sat near and poured out tripe,
"Sir Bute McOoof is the best writer
That ever used a type"
Then first McOoof the letter read,
He jumped o'er houses three,
The second time McOoof he read,
A woeful laff lafftd he.
Last night I saw a Sophomore,
A text book In his arm,
And I fear, I fear, my dear friends
all,
YeACd. he means me harm.
"Alack is me and well-a-day
If I refuse ye Ed.,
He'll cast me In a Illy pond,
With frogs to make my bed."
McOoof he tried; ye Ed. he swore,
"O take this knave from me,
And throw him over ye Siwash
Bock,
To drown him in the sea."
O lang lang may the coeds sit,
A mournful mournful band,
Their hero they will see na malr,
Or hauld his manly hand.
McOoof he lies In the ocean deep,
The meat for crabs, they say,
His bones forgotten, save by the
fish,
When I write this dolorous lay.
ANONYMOUS
Nemets: "Say, that Apple I had
ju*t now contained a worm."
Snare: "Weil, drink Seme water,
and wash it down."
Nemetz: "Nothing doing, let It
walk down."
e '* e
'1 beg year pardon," said the girl
timidly, 'tut would you care to help
thi Working Girls' Home?"
Dr. Sedgewick: ""lure thing. Where
are they?"
, Bon   (innoosntly)i   "Mother,  how
did father become a professor at the
to
, RSCtPE
A newly-wed asked her husband,
who was listening to the radio, to
write down a recipe for her. Another station Intervened and this is
what he wrote: "Hands on hips,
place one cup of flour on tiie
shoulders, raise knees and depress
toes and mix thoroughly ln one-half
cup of milk. Repeat six times. Inhale quickly one-half teaspoonful of
baking powder, lower the leg and
mash two hard boiled eggs in sieve.
Exhale, breathe naturally and sift
into a bowl. Attention. Lie flat on
the floor and roll the white of the
egg backwards until it comes to a
ball. In ten minutes remove from the
fire and rub smartly with a rough
towel. Breathe naturally, dress in
warm flannels and serve with fish
soup."
col
Mother:  "So you're beginning
wonder, too, are you?"
• • •
Falconer: "Do you know the difference between a taxi and a street
car?"
FreahettoJ "No,"
Falooner:   "Fine,   we'll  take  the
street ear."
• • *
Molly; "You remind ma of the
ocean."
Slnjln: "Yes, I know, wild, romantic, restless."
Molly: "No, you make me sick."
• » •
Go Go: "Have you an ear for
music?"
Stop Stop: "No, I use one ear
for telephone calls, and the other as
a pen rack."
*    *    •
Nick: "Gimme a drink."
Rod: "What kind?"
Niok:   "The kind that tastes like
yer foot's asleep."
•'   *    •
Prof. Drummond:
In America should
knocker.
• •  •
Dr.Shrum: "Is heat always generated when two bodies in motion
come together?"
Frosh: "No, sir. I bumped into a
guy at the Frosh Reception and he
knocked me cold.
• •  •
We have heard Himie constantly
bemoaning the fact that his Tux
shirt must have belonged to an Indian before he  got  it,' because  it
kept constantly creeping up on him.
• • •
Gus: I see you've changed your
boarding house."
Wilf: "Yeah. I had to move, stayed
there seven weeks and then found
out they had no bath."
• •  •
Keate: "Which magazine will give
me tlie highest position ln this University?"
Editor: "The powder magazine.
But don't get puffed up."
Every bed-room
have  a  door—
STOCK MARKET NEWS
COURTESY DISUNITED PRESS
New York Shock Exchange:
Algamated Rubber, contrary to report, is not slipping.
There Is no change In X & X Cash
Dear Mr Editor:
I have to write an English 2 essay
and don't know how to start it.
Would you be so kind as to draft
a few suggestions for commencing
themes? If you have time will you
write me a whole theme? I remain,
Yours, etc.,
IWANNAN AN8BR
•  •  •
Editors Reply:
Dear Iwannan:
If you are a male student tha first
of the following themes will be the
type for you to follow.' if female,
the second is your safest bat
Theme 1: U     .
Description^ th, "Pub Office"
When I first entered the Pub Of -
file I had to blink mjr eyes several
times before I could make opt anything to the heavy haze of pipe, cigarette, and cigar smoke, that filled
the place. Stumbling forward I
stumbled ever what, with a shiver
of horror, I thought was a body, but
on examination I found it to be
merely an overturned waste paper
box, its entrails scattered abroad.
Sounding wierdly through tne base
came the uitermittent clatter of §
typewriter, but as I made my way
toward it ^another stacatto rat-tat be-
igPefSe).- BeS^ sejaeg., wa^gfns|Wie^F. ^aeaje.  ■*)**   *™,IW e}..wjsajs'aal
Confused. I caused unaertainly. then
ad to the oornsr from which a
low rumble of oaths rolled forth. A
moments roping and I was before
tiie greet News Manager. There
groveling on the floor, I beheld a
reporter, and the News Manager,
taking no heed of my presence, eon*
tlnued his bitter tirade. Trembling,
plunged across the room and
bumped into a desk, whereupon a
voice boomed: "Kill this, and.out
that head" Waiting tor no more,
I fled uncereinonlously,vaulting the
counter on my way.
Note! Dominant impression, one of
extreme grimaess and ruthless industry. Avoid repetition as above
in "stumbling" and "stumbled"-con-
calve a suitable synonym for one of
these.
Theme 2:
Olrls, could you imagine if you
could the sight that mot my eyes
when I enter that placo called
the Pub one day sometime ago
I don't remember when but remind me later on and I'll tell you.
The first thing I saw was a girl
wearing the most awfully funny
dress, It sort of started at tho neck
then went on and stopped at the
waist and sort of continued on to her
ankle*. By tho way I must tell you
more of this place, It was most delicious to see all the papers scattered
around In the floor ln gay abandon
and gathered In at the hem. I minced
over to the editor with my head tossing and teeth smiling and said Hello Ed. but he didn't know me so I
guess his name wasn't Ed. Maybe
he had some .other name but he never let on, never said a word but just
glared. So I guess his name wasn't
Ed. but how was I to know It wasn't
Ed. Well I took one look around
that horrid place and swept out
taking half the debris with me.
Really girls don't go there the orchestra is terrible and how they
charge for the foodl
Note: Dominant impression of this
theme is garrulity. Avoid this at all
times and don't stress one minor
object throughout the theme. Words
like really and actually should not
boused.  Really they shouldn't.
SO SORRY!
Essondale,
Oct. 08, 1864.
Feature Editor,
Ubyssey,
Dear Sir:
I hearby wish to protest against
the misspelling of the name of one
of the newcomers to your page. The
[correct way to spell the name of Al-
was such a nice night for a murder
a few days ago!
And comes It now my keeper. I
am afraid that he will take me away
for a little holiday. But do not be
discouraged!    I  shall  endeavour  to
answer to all letters you may be
foolish enough to write me. Next
time you hear the escape-siren going
at Essondale, watch for more Co-Co
Nuts in the next Muck-A-Muck issue.
Registers  and  according to present lexis Kohtoff   is   K-q-h-t-o-f-f,   not
financial conditions there is not likely to be any.
C. A. F. Knives remain dull.
Consolidated Bread is rising steadily.
Limburger Cheese Ltd. remains as
strong as ever.
Associated Dandruff is falling rapidly-   Get rid of this.
Coatoff as has been mistakenly surmised. Please rectify this error as
soon as possible.
Yours sincerely,
IVA KOHTOFF
Prof. Lloyd: If the cows startad
sticking their horns in each othet
they wouldn't lay much milk
AND HIM SO
YOUNG TOO
Being the Adventures of Two
Nit-Wits
The other night being Hallowe'en
we decided to sally forth, bu) as
there were two of us, one had to'
sally fifth. However, no whit daunt"
ed by this wo crossed the threshhold
arm in arm, thus both sallying forth
Into a night of adventure.
lh» first thing that struck our
gaze was a very ancient onion,
hurled by a neighborhood gamin.
Wiping the onion from our gase, we
set off in hot pursuit of tha wretch,
but he, perceived our advance and
melted into the night.
From behind us came an uitermittent crackling of fire-crackers and
to we turned and stumbled In the
direction of the noises. As far as
we oouid make out, the person or
persons must have hoard our advance for sudenly all became silent.
Curiosity overcoming caution, we
broke into a jog-trot and thumped
our way onward.
"Stop a moment," whispered Emile,
my companion, "There's some plot
afoot here. Look at that trail ot
sparks.  A fust, most likely."
Silently we retreated to a eafe distance and Watched the line of hi*- -
Ing fire.   As quickly as it had appeared it  vanished,  and
was onoe mere all around us.
•Coins,   Oscar.    It's   sate   ww,
hissed Emile, "the fuse was a fistic."
"O. K. Butch," I replied in true
fcnlllanVtylc. and advanced with my
pal once more.
We had scarcely gone three steps
when the night was rent by a terrific explosion. Emile turned a complete aotnorsalt and lit running, but
In the wrong direction. C«ntding
with some unseen obstacle, tie reeled
drunkenly to one side and erasheel
into a tenet post Bouncing off the
fence post he staggered for a ooupla
of steps then vanlslaag\:;-
view through a gate'1
open beneath his
had he gone than a
sound arose. For about
onds this awful noise kept up then
I heard tiie voice ef Emile gasp out,
"Awrlght eatt How did I know I fell
on yuh?"
To tiie accompaniment of screeching and wailing tho feline fled from
the place of recent anguish, and at
that moment the front porch light
flashed on. Hastily scrambling behind a nearby telephone pole, I
heard, to my great delight, a thoroughly Indignant old lady give Emile
the most thorough tongue-lashing of
his life. It ended with the words,
"and a big boy like, you Should
know bettor than to torture dumb
animals!"
Personally, 1 have never seen stay
animal look dumber than Emile did
at that moment.
The next morning Emile was
glancing through tha Sunday paper
when he ejaculated one word, then
handed the page to me. Reading
slowly I digested the following Information:
"The quietest Hallowe'en  In   the
history of the PoUce Department."
In case you should like to know,
the word Emile said was "LIARS!"
————»i_
There waa an old person of Sparta
Who had twenty-five sons and one,
daughter.
He ted them on snails, and weighed
them on scales—
That wonderful person of Sparta.
*,;H
E. CPOTKINS
MERCHANT TAILOR
Cleaning, Pressing,
Alterations and Repairs
Good Clothes DO Make the Man
WE CALL AND DELIVER
4511 W. 10th      Ell. 1301
Have you difficulty with your wife
MASTERFUL
Buy NEVEROPE PARACHUTE, the hit of the week,
and the joke of the season.
Specially incorported with the latest
NON OPENING DEVICES
Why incur burial expenses?    Take your wife
short flight over False Creek, and drop her overboard in a
Neverope Parachute.   Satisfaction guaranteed
A. 1 Shoe Repair
Shop
Comer Sasamat and 10th
Rear of Home Oil Station
Football Cleats
Bulldog and Panco Soles
your most
economical Investment
are
The Bay Cleaners
and Dyers
Corner 10th and Sasamat
(Bus Terminus)
Dry-Cleaning, Dyeing,
Alterations and Repairing
By Experienced Tailors
PHONE: PT. G. 118 Pago Four
THE   UBYSSEY
Tuesday, November 3, 1931
Varsity In Tie
With Meralomas
In Grid Battle
Playing on a sodden gridiron that
made smooth football impossible, Dr. J
Burke's Blue and Gold Canadian Rugby team from the University of B. C,
went through a good training workout against the Meralomas to earn a
8-8 tie in a scheduled Big Four game
at Athletic Park on Saturday afternoon.* This is Varsity's second to last
game, ita last being with Victoria on
the Island, next Saturday.
Varsity's Una played smoothly on
the wet field and time and again
opened wide holes tor the backfield
men. Hall and Peden and Stewart, a
recruit, did noble work in making
the openings for Dirom and Murdoch.
The students gamed their first point
in the latter part of the first quarter
on Murdoch's kick to the deadline
after an exchange of punts with Me-
teed of Meralomas. McLeod booted
a poor one and on a bad snap Varaity
smeared the kicker. Dirom then
plunged and Murdoch booted for tho
initial telly.
In the second quarter tha collegians
obtained possession deep in tha opposition's territory and after a first
down or so brought about by Dirom
and Murdoch, the latter tried a drop
kick which Just missed the bar but
went to the deadline for another
noint.
Meralomas then got to work and
With swinging bucks worked the ball
book into Varsity's ares and then Me
, Lood kicked lor the Orangemen's first
tetnt. Mendema's coach, Frank Hut-
, materially in gaining a tie game for
the Clubbers. He booted theftieing
petal of the game after a nice run
whan it appeared that he waa about
to loss ground on e fumble.
The third canto saw some fine work
by Dirom, Hedreen and Morrow. The
students again put on the old oolle-
glan driving finish but It failed to get
Varsity made nine first downs in the
game to Maraloma's eight. Varsity
completed one forward pass out of
two While Meralomas had four uncom-
~pd1eteeY Varsity's suoocesful one went
from farrington to Bolton.
The teams:
Meralomas—Hammond; Elliott, Williams, Cooper, Oakenfullj Lowe,
Spence; Art Hunt; Parker,' Rollins,
McLeod, Hutchison, Lythgoe; Jim
Stewart. '
Varsity: T. Brown-Purdue; Mitchell,
Hall, E. Brown, Stewart; Peden,
Baynes, Morrison; Farrington, Bolton,
Malcolm; McGulre, Johnson; Hedreen,
Dirom, Murdoch, Mclntyre, Henderson, Chodat; Doug. Oordon, Root,
Morrow.
SATURDAY SPORT RESULTS
English Rugby:
Miller Cup,
Ex-Magee 8, Varsity I.
U.B.C. 6, Rowing Club 20.
Division 2,
U.B.C. 0, North Vancouver
All-Blacks 30.
Canadlan Rugby:
Big Four,
Varaity 2, Meralomas 2.
Senior City,
Meralomas 18, Varsity 0.
Soccer:
Division 2,
Renfrew Argyles .7, Varsity 0.
Junior Alliance,
Stock Exchange S, Varsity 0.
Grass Hockey:
Mainland League,
Cricketers 2, Vanity 2.
Olrls' League.
U.B.C. 1, Ex-South Van. 4.
Cinder Men
Compete In
Meet Today
BLUE AND GOLD McKECHNIE CUP
CANDIDATES PREPARE FOR BATTLE
mtmsmtmswmstm—a-_•«_■
Student! Prepare For Armistice Day Battle-Cleveland and Senkler Injured At
Miller Cap Squads Drop Both Tilts. -Vanity Teami Show Improvement
♦
Varsity suffered a set-back in the
Millar Cup series on Saturday, losing
to Ex-Magee 8-0, and to tha Rowing
Club 20-8. Smooth play waa almost
impossible in the thick mud that covered tha field and It was partly due
to this that the lighter U.B.C. teams
were unable to make any headway
against the heavy opposition.
In the game against Ex-Magee, tha
students lost two men before half
time and were forced to continue with
only thirteen players. Ed Senkler was
laid out with a broken ankle and his
loss will be keenly felt on tho forward
line. Courtenay Cleveland waa also
forced to leave the field with injuries
having suffered a sight concussion,
and his retirement greatly weakened
tha three-quarter line. Despite the
muddy field, the backfield handled
well, and during the first half the
Mages line was threatened on several
Ruggers Take
Playing in a driving rain, Varaity
third division English Ruggers out
splashed Ex-Brentwood to win 3-0
at Renfrew en Saturday.
The Freshmen were always ln
command of the play, against the
Victoria boys, but costly fumbles and
miss-kicks by the three-quarters
prevented a larger score. The U.B.C.
scrum played a tine game throughout, covering up the errors in the
backfield by dribbling the ball back.
The teams wero evenly matched ln
the first half, but after the Interval
the Frosh wero never outside the Ex-
Brentwood 25 yard line. Twice the
Brentwood line was crossed when
tha scrum dribbled through but each
time it was touched back for a "two-
bit" kick. The Freshmen finally
scored when McKeown went over
after a five-yard scrum, a few minutes before the whistle. Teal, at fullback and Thomson in tiie scrum
turned in nice games for Varsity,
while White was outstanding tor Ex-
Brentwood.
Varsity and Y. M. C. A. will' clash
In a track meat at 8 o'clock tonight In
tha Horstshow Building at Hastings
Park, whan many brilliant athletes
will attempt to shatter existing records.
After the meet, which will last until about ten o'clock, arrangements
have been made for a dance until midnight As for the track meet Itself,
many thrilling events'are slated. The
half mile will bring together, Herd,
one oi the fastest half milars 'of the
city, and Forsythe of Varsity. Forsythe made a name for himself last
spring by winning this event against
tha College ef Puget Bound and should
make things hot for Herd. The Varsity star will also compete in the high
jump i event. The mile event will
against McComber of the "Y." Mc
Comber this year has cleared 6 feat
and should make a place on tha Olympic team next summer.
In tho daahes Varaity will have
Bobby Gaul and BIB Stott, Both will
be entered In the 40 and 880 yard
events. Bobby last spring tied the
Varsity record in the 890 and Stott is
junior champion of Manitoba. These
are sure Varaity point getters.
In the quarter mile Varsity has
Osborne and Stewart, both of whom
raced in five events this year and
have shown good form. These boys
will also compete in the hop, step and
iump event. The mile event will
see Dunn and Allen of Varsity extend Calrd ot the "Y" to the limit.
The relays which proved so exciting last year should be just as good
or better this fall. In the two lap relay U. B. C. will have Osborne, Stewart, Clarke and Pi Campbell, while
Stott, Gaul, Ormsby, Max Stewart
and Clarke will represent the students In the shuttle.
Varsity will be weakened in the
weight events through the loss of Dirom who is out because of injuries,
but Haddon Agnew has proven a
capable substitute for the husky
science man.
Tickets at thirty-five cents may be
obtained from any member of the
Track Club.
THE TICKET SONG
I'll get by as long as I have you.
Fraternity and
Sorority
Christmas   Cards
Now is the time to arrange for
your special Christmas Cards
before the holiday rush sets in.
Call at our store and see our
original and novel designs just
made for your organization.
I
Gehrke's
566 Seymour Street
Puck Chasers
Are Defeated
In Two Games
U. B. C. lost to Ex-South Vancouver 4-1, and Varsity was beaten 1-0
by Normal in Saturday's grass hookey games.
Both teams were hindered from
playing well by the condition of the
fields which were very slippery.
The Varsity game at Strathcona
was pretty much in the hands of the
students, but owing to the very poor
shooting no score was made.
A feature of this game was the
penalty bully between Isabel Mac-
arthur, centre forward for Varsity,
and the opposing goalie, which took
place right on the edge of the goal.
Owing to the quick work of tiie
goalie, no tally was made.
Margaret Beaumont at right-wing
for Varsity and Nance Carter on the
left-wing made long runs up the
field in attempts to score.
The goal keeper, Robina Mouat,
played well; she allowed the ball
past her only once.
During the greater part of the first
period ot the U. B. C. game at Memorial, the University players were
attacking the South Vancouver goal
and three scores would likely have
been made had It not been for poor
shooting. Two attempts at scoring
by South Vancouver brought results
and the count was 2-0 in their favor
at the end of this half.
A dribble by the wing player, a
pass to her inside, who in turn
passed the ball to the centre forward, Hope Palmer, made the score
2-1 in the first few minutes of play
in the second half.
For most of the remainder of the
In tho second frame, with a heavy
rain falling, tha game turned into a
punting duel, and Howie Cleveland,
who played hla usual steady game at
full-back excelled In this phase of tho
battle. Bert Barratt waa also in the
limelight with several brilliant runs,
but the greasy ball and wet field
prevented any scoring.
In the game against Rowing Club,
the edge was distinctly against Varsity. They had a scintillating three-
quarter line that accounted for four
tries, the other counts being made en
penalty kicks. Varsity, moreover, was
playing with a light seven man scrum
as against a heavier eight man peck
that the Rowers were .using. The
first half was even with the club
team leading by a W More at the interval Art Mercer was responsible
for the Blue and Oold tally, making
a wonderful 80-yard run through the
Rowing Club squad to cross the Red
and White squad's goal line. Bobby
Gaul converted.
Varsity fought bitterly through tha
second sterna but the students ware
no match for the Rowers, who scored
two more touches and a pair of tries.
Junior Gridders
Beaten 18-0 By
Meraloma Crew
Varsity Gridders lost another game
in the senior city loop when they
were defeated 18-0 by Meralomas at
McBride Park on Saturday.
Meralomas had most, of the play,
and only in the last three minutes
did Varsity appear dangerous. Early
in the game the club team scored a
touchdown which went unconverted,
and on the following play a Meraloma
man ran the ball back to U. B. C.'s
two yard line. From there the Orange
and Black pounded through for their
second touch which waa also unconverted.
Two minutes before half-time.
Meralomas marked up another, by
virtue of some hard line plunging
and fine end runs. Again they failed
to gather in the extra point, and the
Interval arrived with the score 15-0.
No further touchdowns were made
ln the second half of the game, Meralomas being content with three
dead-line kicks while Varsity was
unable to break the goose-egg. Van
Morrison, who had been out of the
game up till Saturday, decided to
play the last three minutes
and with him calling the signals, the Blue and Oold staged an
inspired rally. Matters had already
gone too far however, and Meralomas maintained- their eighteen point
margin till the final whistle.
McKECHNIE CUP
The silver trophy for which,Varsity's English Rugby stars will be
battling when they oppose the Vancouver rap squad at Brockton Point
next Wednesday afternoon la the McKechnie Cup. Not since 1911 has the
traditional mug rested in the U.B.C.
trophy cabinet, and tha Blue and Gold
club Is out to bring It back to the
Feint Grey College.
period, U. B. C. played a defensive
game, but South Vancouver women
managed to score two more counts,
one through Muriel Harvie, a former
U. B. C. student.
Mabel McDonald, Elml Teppo and
Mamie McKee were outstanding defense players for U. B. C. and Bea
Sutton was the best of the forwards.
,U. B. C: M. McDonald, I. Wallace,
E. Teppo, M. Lang, M. McKee, M.
Brown, V. Mellish, B. Sutton, H.
Palmer, C. Stellars, L. Rowntree.
Varsity: R. Mouat, D. Johnson, O.
Downes, M. Duncan, D. Lawrance,
M. Finch, M. Beaumont, E. Allchln,
I. Macarthur, M. Macdonald, N. Carter.
There will be a practice at Connaught Park at 3:30 on Wednesday.
A man attacked by two highwaymen put up a terrific fight Finally he
was overcome and searched. All they
found on him was a sixpence. The
bandits were amazed.
"I say," exclaimed one, "you don't
mean to tell us you put up a fight
like that for a measely sixpence? Why
we almost had to kill you."
"Well," answered the victim, "the
truth of the matter is I didn't want
my financial condition exposed."
Manitobans
Cop Prairie
Grid Crown
Saskatoon, Nov. 8—A- fighting
Green and Gold horde from the University of Alberto that would not
admit defeat in the fact of tremendous odds practically eliminated Saskatchewan from the Western Canada
intercollegiate Rugby race when they
snatched a 8-4 victory from the Saskatoon collegians ln the middle-west
city on Saturday afternoon. It was
Lyle Jestley who starred at end last
season for British Columbia, that
turned the tide in the final minutes
of the battle and gave the Manitobans a two game lead on the prairie
title and made the trip to Vancouver
almost a certainty for the Winnipeg
team. With only ten minutes to go
tiie former Blue and Gold gridder
snared a fumbled punt, and raced
around the end for a touchdown and
a 1 point victory.
Thus the slender hope of the Saskatchewan team for retaining the
Hardy trophy this season faded into
obscurity. Manitoba has but two
more scheduled games, and even if
they dropped both of these would
still be tied for the top position. By
taking the tilt in Saskatoon next Saturday, the Brown and Gold grldden
can cinch the trip to the Pacific
Coast for the Western Canada Inter
collegiate finals,
Hockey Tussle
Ends In Loss
For Students
Playing on a rain-soaked field, the
Varaity Men's grass hockey team
was handed a 3-1 set-back by Vancouver at Connaught Park, Saturday.
Early in the game both teams organized attacks but were checked
each way by sound defence play. After ten minutes Vancouver forced a
comer and the resulting shot slipped
past Selder to draw first blood.
Determined not to allow the Van-
couverltes to repeat the dose, Blue
and Oold forwards, supported by
their halves, rushed the ball into opposing territory, giving the fullbacks plenty to think about. The
students could not keep up the fast
pace however, and gradually lost
ground to the more experienced
team.
Following up a long pass, Vancouver forwards pressed hard around
the Varsity.goal, and shortly afterwards bulged the net a second time,
bringing the score to 2-0 at half-
time.
Soon after the crossover, Vancouver's stick-wlelders scored their last
goal, but only after a hard tussle
with the college backs. Play now
ranged up and down the field, Varsity showing great tenacity. Several
student attacks worried the Vancouver aggregation, and ten minutes before the final whistle Semple shot a
goal to close the score at 3-1 against
Varsity.
Knight at left-wing turned in an
exceptlonaly fine brand of hockey,
while Spurrier and Lee were strong
at centre-half and left-back respectively.
On November Uth, the University
will face one of tha hardest games In
English Rugby this year. It Is the
first McKechnie Cup feature, against
the Rap team, a team that will be
chosen from the leading teams in the
city. For the past ten years Varsity
has been a serious competitor in the
series, having held it for five times
since they entered into competition
for this trophy, tho emblem of Rugby
supremacy in this province.
This year the University has two
senior teams which have proved to
be as strong as any other in tha
league. From these thirty* players
there will be chosen fifteen to play
In the game on November Uth, and
it can be easily be soon that tha team
will bo there with the goods.
Student support is needed mora than
ever before in this game. It is the
first event of the homecoming series,
It takes place on a holiday, and will
be followed by a tea-dance, In honour of the teams, Tickets'will be on
sale on tht campus soon.
Soccer Team
Drops Game
. OnSatarday
In a Junior looser game with
Stock Exchange at McBride Park on
Saturday, Varsity came out on the
short end of a 8-0 count. The contest was marked by many mlstakss
and as a result Varsity in particular,
passed up several golden opportun-
nties to score. The right-wing men
had an easy time of it as they were
given very few passes. Tho goal
tenders also had vary little to do,
as neither aide put in many shots.
Varaity had the better of the play
ln the first half, but since ability
waa conspiclous by its absence, no
goals were chalked up In their favor. McKissock of Stock Exchange
opened the scoring after S minutes
of play with a low shot from the
edge of the goal area. Several determined eforts by Varsity to equalize ended in failure, and the score
at half-time was still 1-0 for Stock
Exchange. In the second canto Varsity faded more and more from the
picture as time went on. After 15
minutes Dale put his team two up
when he netted the ball after the
Varsity custodian had allowed It to
slip from his hands. The third and
last goal of tho match was scored
by Munn. It was a high bounding
shot which deflected from the student's net-minder and rolled slowly
across the goal line.
No player was particularly outstanding for either side although
Rann Matthison, a newcomer in the
U. B. C. squad did some snappy
work.
The team: Shayler, Roper, C.
Smith, Kincade, McLeod, Fletcher
White, Matthison, Mundle, Atwater
and Ranaden.
ii —n — n_li$
I ■_■««—»—..—»-.— nM..M«—nim_w ■-« ,
Assistant Grid Coach
■ "■ll ,   w    ..■.,.■.—...  ll...—....-■* I
HAS MANY STUDENTS
EmKjDJN SPORTS
The University of New Brunswick
claims a Dominion record for average student participation in athletics.
No less than 74 per cent of the en-
tlre'student body are at present engaging in supervised games of one
type or another according to statistics compiled by Coach Ted Coffey.
This is believed to be far in advance
of participation in other non-mllltary
universities of the Dominion and the
United States.
The Freshmen with a percentage
of 95 are either the most athletic or
the most enthusiastic of the students. The Juniors are next with 71
percent, the Seniors show a 65 per
cent turnout, and the Sophomores
trail with 62.5 percent. The percentage check-up was made by
Coach Coffey on football, track, soft-
ball, tennis and golf, participation in
both intramural and varsity sport
being recognized.
"Coach Coffey is to be congratulated for the energy and capability
with which he has handled his games
program this year. Through his effort and encouragement a very large
section of the student body is getting
direct benefit from athletics. The
busiest man on the campus, Ted is
being recognized as a genuine asset
to the University. His achievement
Is one which might be emulated to
advantage by other Canadian Universities.
'    VIC. ODLUM
In 1928, when the University of B.C.
won the Lipton Cup, and the first
season of Intercollegiate Rugby on the
coast, Vic Odium hold the position of
skipper and star middle on the Varsity squad, For several years since
then he has been out of touch with
athletics at British Columbia, but this
fall he has returned as a coach and Is
of great assistance to Dr. Oordon
Burke In building up tha Intercollegiate team that will face the prairie
winner at Athletic Park- on November
li -
Soccerites
Outscored
Saturday
In one of those freak games. In
which play is evenly divided, while
the scoring Is all one-sided, thc Senior Soccer team absorbed a 7*0 defeat on Saturday afternoon at the
hands of Renfrew Argyles at Renfrew Park. The score is no indication of the play, as in everything but
finish, the Varsity boys held their
own with their opponents, ln flni«n,
however, the play of the Renfrew
boys wiu perfect, thc forwards combining well In a short-passing attack,
and making every chance co> nt.
Renfrew kicked off, playing one
man Short, and for ten minutes, Varsity was on the attack. When finally Renfrew found their feet and
came down to Varsity territory,
Waugh handled about thirty-five
yards out. • The resultant free-kick
struck the underside of the bar and
bounded through. The second go^t
fcarne soon after, from another high
shot. Varsity was getting a fair share
of the play but did not have the
necessary punch to convert their attacks. A corner was won by the
Argyles and this resulted in still another goal. Before half time, another
counter was marked up, this time
the goal being headed in. Play so
far had been even, despite the heavy
advantage tiie Argyles held. Half-
time found play ui mid-field, with
the Blue and Oold down four goals.
After the Interval, Waugh and Kozoolin changed places, Waugh going
to centre-half, and Kosoolin to right-
half. Varaity again commenced on
tiie attack McDougal and Waugh being responsible for many fine plays.
However, Renfrew broke away to
score their fifth goal. The shot was
made from the goal-line, and crossed
the goal to strike the far post and
cross the line. Near the end Renfrew
added two more, one on a low shot
In the corner, and the other from a
penalty. Play was in mid-field at
the whistle.
Varsity's heavy defeat was the result of lack of finish and their attempt to play Renfrew's short passing game instead of a kick and run
attack., Outstanding for Varaity were
McDougal and Waugh, who broke
play after play, and who were also
strong in attack. Costain, although
badly hurt in the first half, gamely
continued, and turned in a good performance. Individually, the whole
team played well, but could not cope
with the perfection of the Renfrew
attack.
The, . team: Frattinger, McGill,
Grant, Waugh, Kozoolin, McDougal,
Smith, Munday, Costain, D. Todd,
and L. Todd.
BANK OF
MONTREAL
UNIVERSITY BRANCH
Corner
10th Ave. and Trimble St.
Bankers lor Tho University of British Columbia
Staff and Students
are cordially invited to
avail themselves of tha
Services of this bank.
A. B. Moore, Manager
ANNE'S TEA HOUSE
The Right Place to eat.
Lunches, Teas, Short Orders.
Some Cooking. Moderate Prices
^verti^st^ents feal.atTojmc^e
^
GAS — OIL
Ibcpert Tke and Battery
General Repairs
VARSITY SERVICE
University Gates, Ell. 1201
"Just Where the Bus Stops"
PG. 17 Ntg*tCsi___o*t-*l
K. I. PATT1BSON
PubUe Menoatapher
4478-lath Avenue W.
' Manuscripts, Essays, Theses, Etc,
Mimacgmphing — Multigtaphing
* "I Make a Good Essay Better"
\
The Doctor, who was famous for his
cynicism about women, stared hard
at his client as the latter entered his
surgery.
"I perceive that you are ln a very
despondent mood," he commenced.
"In fact, you don't seem to care what
happens to you."
"Good gracious!" the client gasped.
"How on earth did you deduce that?"
"You came here in a motor-car and
you let your wife drive," he said.
SPALDING
mnHmintxtn
Bickrtt
A complete stock of naw
Frames which can be
strung to your special requirements.
Priced at from
aMeOOtoftatiO
Aa G. Spalding
x & Bros.
424 Hastings W.
Trin. 5401        Trin. 5402
Smart
GUARANTEED
WATERPROOF
In the wanted cream
shade—and in Trench
le
$9.75
'e
I_MITED
Cor. Hastings and Homer
WE GREATLY
APPRECIATE YOUR
PATRONAGE
THIS   RESTAURANT   has
been a U. B. C. rendex-
youa for years.   We hope
It will be your rendez-vous for
years to come.
We certainly try to give the
beat meals possible at reasonable prices. But if in any way
we can better serve you, let us
know. Our best efforts are
yours to command.
CAFE
722 Granville Street
The Vancouver Sun
44
Vancouver's Home Newspaper
,»
50c
A MONTH
PHONE TRINITY
4111

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