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The Ubyssey Jan 26, 1932

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Issued Twice Weekly by the Students' Publications Board of The University of British Columbia
VOL. XIV
SE===
VANCOUVER, B.C., TUESDAY, JANUARY 20, 1032
BEaBMBXsannBaaasasaasassKSEaasssa&atsaasaBBaa
No. 25
Toronto "Varsity"
Comes to Support
Of U.B.C Students
Editor Urges N.F.C.U.S. To Offer Support
To Student Body Here—All Eastern Utii-
vertitiet Follow Suit
The following article, reprinted from the University of
foronto "Vanity" of January 18, indicates the interest that
■tern Canadian colleges are taking In event* happening ln
Jritiah Columbia. This interest lg further evidenced by a let-
>r which Earl Vance, president of the Alma Mater Society,
lias received from the president of the N.F.C.U.S. The letter
asks for suggestions aa to how the Federation can be of assistance. /
s. q. s.
"It seems hard that a state university should be faced with
a forty-five percent cut ln the government grant when, except
for feeg, that university hag no other source of revenue that ia
worth mentioning. Yet that ia the situation that haa come to
pass In the last few days at the University of British Columbia.
The Committee appointed to deal with the allocation of funds
has reported that it may be necessary to close certain departments, abolish some faculties, confine activity to first and second year work, and abolish research work. While students have
registered vigorous protest and the downtown press have scored
the government for contemplating such drastic action, we are
assured that it is a possibility, and that final action will be taken
in the legislature next month.
"The University of British Columbia caters to the whole
province, although the city of Vancouver has a majority in the
student body, due largely to the concentration of population
in that city. The students are very much alive and want to
prevent any curtailing of present facilities, which are quite limited, but the state cannot see its way clear at present to obviate
the difficulty. As the Western Provinces are much harder hit
by the critical conditions of finances than the East, it seems
a step that should not be taken without endeavouring in some
way to secure the help of the Dominion. The university system
of Canada has never been as strong as it might have been, due
largely to geographical difficulties, but with the present wave
of nationalism that is sweeping the country, we feel sure that
the other provinces of Canada would come to the aid of British
Columbia rather than risk jeopardising the future of a. state
university.
"Students are rapidly becoming conscious of the possibilities of closer union with one another, and the resultant benefits
for the nation. At such a time as this any interference with the
system in any individual province would be fatal, and must be
prevented if at all within our power. We are perfectly certain
that the other three universities of the West are vitally concerned over this matter, as there exists a closer bond of fellowship now than ever before. The essential thing is to bring the
matter to the attention of the powers that be, as the support of
constituted authority with its financial backing is one of the
prime requisites, if we are to take the alleged financial crisis
of the Tolmie government seriously. And as fellow students we
should have sufficient breadth of vision to come to the aid of
U.B.C. that they do not suffer as long as the rest of the Dominion is in a position to help them. Read again the proposed curtailment of activity and try to imagine such a process
going on in this university.
"Correspondence containing constructive criticism will be
welcomed, and we feel that some official representation should
be made to our governing body on behalf of this university
that faces such a dangerous situation. The newly elected president of the N.F.C.U.S. is president of our own Student Council,
and it is an opportunity for this organisation to show that it
is of value to the universities as a group. To him we appeal
that a thorough investigation may be made with a view to determining what may be done to solve the problem that is presented."
Short Course Aggies
To be Addressed
By President
For the first time since the establishment of the increasingly popular Short Courses in Agriculture,
students registered for this work will
be addressed by the President of
the Alma Mater Society. Earl J.
Vance will speak to the students on
"Some Aspects' of Student Life," in
Agriculture 100 at 1:00 p.m, on Wednesday, January 27. In previous
years these hard-working students
have been strictly ignored by the
general student body and this is apparently the opening of a new era,
and bodes well for further co-operation and courtesy between the two
groups. All short course students
are asked to attend and any other
students that are interested will be
welcomed.
The Close-up Te.t
By Tavender
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Draw Results
0/Main'Event*
Now Available
Plana for the event of the season—
the Senior Ball, are finally completed and the Draw results posted. The
Ball is to take place In the Ballroom
of the Hotel Vancouver, Thursday.
at 9:00 p.m.
Admittance will be by Invitation
only and these were distributed yesterday from the Auditorium box office. Those who did not get their
invitations yesterday may dd' So today. Invitations will be shown to the
commissionaire at the door but will
be collected at supper.
Patrons and patronesses for the
event will be Chancellor and Mrs.
R. D. McKechnie, President find
Mrs. L. S. Klinck. Dean and Mrs.
Buchanan, Dean and Mrs. R. W.
Brock, Dean and Mrs. Clement, and
Dean M. L. Bollert. Professor and
Mrs. H. F. Angus, Professor and
Mrs. A. B. Lighthall, Dr. and Mrs.
G. G. Moe, Miss M. F. Gray, and
Mr.  A. C. Cooke.
The men will be given until one
a.m. Thursday morning to look up
their draws. After that time, the
women will be given the opportunity to invite whom they choose.
N.F.C.U.S. DROPS
BUREAU SCHEME
OF ADVERTISING
Players Club
To Present Play
In Period Dress
Executive Anticipates Extensive Tour
Through Towns of Province In May,
Numerous Letters Received
Plans for a National Advertising
Bureau met with unfavorable support
at the N.F.C.U.S. Conference held last' ments will be announced soon,
"Fashions of 1904 will prevail ln
this year's Spring Play," says Sidney
Risk, director. He has spent a great
deal of time looking Up the dress of
that period and is now well acquainted with even the little details, j
The ladies wil) be gowned in long, I
flowing silks and satins, while the
men's trousers will be at least two
inches above the ankle and not more
than fourteen inches around tlie
cuff. Mr. Risk has also carefully
planned the curtains and draperies
to  suit   tlie  style  of  that  time.
Rehearsals have been in progress
for about three weeks, and thc actors are beginning to get a real grip
on the various characters. The final
cast will be chosen at tryouts on
Wednesday  the 27th.
Some regret has been expressed
that Bill Cameron, leading man in
last year's Spring Play, "The Young
Idea," Is unable to find time to act
this year, He is still active in the
club, however, serving at present on
its executive board, and will probably return to the footlights again
next year.
The various costume, scenery, and
business committees, important factors in every production, are now
being drawn  up,  and  the appolnt-
The
Christmas. It was pointed ottt that
most University papers already had
valuable personal connections which
it would be unsatisfactory to turn
over to an Impersonal advertising
bureau.
The problem of student discipline
came in for considerable discussion.
It was pointed out that the majority
of the student governments handled
the problem themselves. This, however, was not the case as far as Manitoba was concerned, where a movement was on foot to put the administration of this phase of student life
entirely in the hands of the faculty.
This was felt to be an unfortunate
condition, and steps were taken to
oppose it.
The relationship of paid assistants
was discussed at great length. Toronto
and McGill were the only two universities apart from B.C. which employed
full-time employees. At the other
colleges there is no apparent difficulty
In handling those that they do employ,
In almost every case, some help is received from the faculty in the matter of coaches. It is general practice for a man to be employed part
time, usually as a physical instructor,
who also acts as a coach for one or
more of the major sports. In this way
the expense of training athletic teams
is considerably lessened,
At McGill and Toronto a great deal
of  the  executive  work  is  done by
faculty advisors and thus the students
themselves have time to do most of
(Please turn to Page Two)
EARL VANCE
COMING EVENTS
TUESDAY-(Today):
S.C.M. Lecture, Prof. Angus.
Aggie 100, 12:10 noon.
duties of business manager have already been assigned to Archie Dick.
Letters are pouring in from numerous B. C. towns, requesting the
players to visit them this spring; all
of which leads the executive to expect a very successful tour in May.
Owing to the university ineligibility rules, Rann Matheson Has been
forced to drop the role of the 16-
year old boy, Cosmo, but the gap
be filled by Jack Sargent who was
on tour last year.
News & Views
Of Other U's
OBSCENE HUMOR
The "Daily Tar Heel" publishes
three articles by editors of prominent university papers on the subject
of obscene humor in college publications. Without exception, opinions
of these editors are against smutty
stories unless they are really clever.
To quote the editor of the Illinois
Siren, "—dirty stories are swell—if
they are funny. The sad part of it
all is that very few of them are
funny, and all of them are dirty,"
Hear, hear!
*   •   *
BRIDGE COMES TO U.
And now the craze for bridge
tournaments has come to institutions
of higher learning! The U. of Washington Daily is sponsoring a miniature Culbertson-Lenz contest and
the battlers are under way for valuable prizes.
*Pinnief Chorus
To he Selected
Next Practice
With the date of the production of
H. M. S. Pinafore less than a month
away, members of the Musical Society are devoting all their time and
energy to rehearsals. Final tryouts
for members of the chorus will be
held In Auditorium 207 Wednesday
noon.
The scenery for the opera is being
arranged under the direction of Gordon Wilson. Alice Rowe, leading
soprano, also looks after the costumes, most of which are being
made  by  members  of the  society.
Owing to the demand for seats
last year, the opera will be produced
four nights instead of three as for-
merly. The first night will be students night with tickets at a special
reduced   rate.
The task of producing an opera is
not an easy one. It entails much
more work than that of producing a
play. There must be endless sectional rehearsals, before the real
work of synchronising the different
sections begins. Members of the society are urged to realize this, and
the fact that now that stage prac-
(Please turn to Page Two)
COMMITTEE ON
REDUCED GRANT
KEEPS SILENCE
No public statement was isued as
a result of the meeting of the Special Committee of the Board of Governors which is considering the proposed cut in the legislative grant to
the University, when that body met
Thursday, January 21.
The committee which consists of
Messrs. B. C. Nicholas, F. J. Burd,
C. Spencer, R. L. Reid and Dr.
Klinck, considered two matters at
the meeting. The first of these was
the memoranda prepared by the
President and the Deans of the various Faculties with respect to tRe
proposed budget reduction. The
second matter was a communication
from Mr. Sherwood Lett which is
believed to have included a request
for information concerning the University.
A meeting of the Board of Governors was held last night and it is
possible that the report of the Special Committee will be made public
as a result of this meeting.
Cavorting
Co-eds At
Hi-Jinks
Unutual and. Original Costume* Make
Hl-llnki Great Sueceaa
Behind tightly locked doors, fantastically garbed women held their
annual Hi-Jinks party on Friday
night in tha Varaity gym, under tha
auaptcel of th* W. U. 8. with Dorothy Myers In charge. Patron****!
were Dean Bollert, Mrs. Klinck and
Miss Grace Bollert.
Swaying to th* soft chanting of
voices and ukelelea, Naomi Benyai
led th* program with a Hula danc*.
It waa v*ry different from anything
ever put on at Hl-Jlnke before, and
was enthusiastically received. Arts
'85 sponsored this it*m.
Bylaw No. II Violated
Two laughable recitations followed
by .Swanhtld Mathison, Arts '82.
Baryl Rogers scored another hit this
year aa Angus MacTavish In parson.
In th* midst of her Interpretation of
the national dance of Scotland, aha
glided, by force of habit and a flask,
into the dance of spring.
A skit with a beautiful maiden ln
distress, a dashing prince charming,
and a gouty old papa was next put
on by the Literary Forum. May
Bescoby, Olive Musgrave, Mary Mc-
Qeer, Isabel Arthur and Betty
Gourre lent their talents to make
it the success it was.
A skit by the Nursing classes followed. The girls taking part were
Vida Caul, Asenath Leatch, Madeline Putnam, Louise Beald, Lprna
Makepiece, Dorothy Oswald, and
Kay Taylor. Next a perfect picture
of a small town railway station was
grave, MarlM^McMillan, Elma New-
combe, Heleti? Lowe, Helen Trapp,
and Juanita  Miller.
The next item was a tap-dance by
the Gym Club, the dancers being
Evelyn Filmer, Catherine McLeod,
Beryl Rogers, Kay Robertson, Marion Smith. Mabel Brown, Ruth Tisdall and Grace Clark.
Prizes Awarded
Arts '32 gave the true inner story
of the legend of . Lochinvar. Emma
Wilson was heart-throbbing as "the
young gallant" himself. Esme Thompson, Isabel Harvey, Lillian Scott,
and Jean McNaughton also had parts
in the skit. This entertaining item
was followed by the Grand March in
which all the girls paraded in their
fancy attire before the judges, who
attempted to decide on the most
striking costumes. Ivy Dezall as a
Bandana girl was awarded the prize
for the most original costume.
Jeanne Butorac, who merited the
prize for the prettiest costume, wore
the native dress of the Czecho-Slo-
vaklans. The funniest costume was
worn,by Esther Williams who wore
a robe of ingeniously draped towels.
Audrey Hughes and Marjory Kil-
gour as an Irish pair received the
prize for the best couple.
The refreshments were as usual
well-received. During supper Mrs.
Klinck with the assistance of Dorothy Myers awarded the prizes to
the winners.
Co-Eds, Photographed
The evening ended In dancing in
which everyone took part. During
the dance, the prize winners and
others had their pictures taken by
the Artona Studio, which afforded
much delight and amusement to the
onlookers.
During the course of the evening,
many manly faces were seen pressed
against the window panes, looking
with wistful eyes on • the scene of
gayety—but mere man was debarred,
and he seemed rather surprised that
he not only was not missed, but
actually was not wanted.
Merritt Herald Criticizes
Proposed Cut In Grant
(Reprinted from  the  Merritt  Herald)
SLASHING AT U. B. C. WILL BE COSTLY
A clever Merritt student won the Governor-General's medal and a $100
Scholarship for being top in Yale district in the Junior Matriculation examinations. She wished to take a pharmacy course at the University of British Columbia in Vancouver. Because the course she wished to take was
not available at the U. B. C. she enrolled at the University of Alberta in
Edmonton, in other words outside her own province, Not only this, but
the student loses scholarship credit that is applicable in the U. B, C. but
not in the University of Alberta. This same student has begun he* career
in Edmonton by passing her first examinations with First Class Honors.
This example illustrates what may be repeated many-fold if the proposed
slash in grants by the B. C. Government to the University of British Columbia results in elimination of educational departments. B. C. Students,
educated out of B, C. revenue, will be forced in large numbers to go East
or to the United States for university training, ther* to live, there to spend
money, there to become adopted, educationally, and there to be claimed as
a home product in the case of outstanding successes as students. Page Two
THE UBYSSEY
Tuesday, January 26, 1932
iHltr tf bpmnt
(Member P.I.P.A.) Phone: PT. GREY 128
Issued every Tuesday and Friday by the Student
Publication Board of the University of British Columbia,
West Point Grey
Mail Subscription rate: $3 per year
Advertising rates on application.
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF-Wilfred Lee
EDITORIAL STAFF
Senior Editor for Friday: Frances Lucas
Senior Editor for Tuesday: Mairi Dingwall
Literary Editor: Mollie Jordan.
Sport Editor: Gordon Root.      Feature Editor: Tom How
News Manager: St. John Madeley
Associate Editors: Mollie Jordan, Norman Hacking,
Day Washington.
Exchange Editor: N. Nemetz
Assistant Editors: R. Harcourt, Margaret Little, A. Thompson, S. Keate, Guy Palmer.
Office Assistant: Cella Lucas
Cartoonist: W. Tavender Columnist: R. Grantham
REPORTORIAL STAFF
Pat Kerr, A. White, W. Cameron, Kay Crosby, Betty
Gourre, D. Perkins, Virginia Cummings, Kay Greenwood, S, Aqua, J. Miller, J.  Stanton, Agnes Davies,
Cella Lucas.
BUSINESS STAFF
Business Manager: Reg. Price
Advertising: N. Nemetz Circulation: M. Miller
Business Assistants: S. Lipson, E. Benson, B. Gillies,
H. Barclay, A. Wood.
TUESDAY, JANUARY 26, 1932
THE HUSH HUSH POLICY
It is nearly three weeks since the news of
the proposed cut in the legislative grant to the
University broke on the campus. At the time
it was generally felt that the matter was a serious one and that something should be done
about it.   What is the situation today?
An, atmosphere of secrecy pervades the
campus. The Special Committee of the Board
of Governors investigating the matter has declined to make a statement. The president of
the Alma Mater Society has been unable to
obtain pertinent information which he desired.
It is rumored that the students are organising
but no one seems to know much about it. The
Alumni are going to act, it is said, but nothing
definite has been heard. Professors object to
being quoted; efforts are being made to withhold news from the downtown press; the Ubyssey has been frequently asked to refrain from
publishing this fact or that bit of news. At all
costs nobody must know what his neighbors
are doing.
If the proposed cut is going to materialise
and nothing can be done about it, the sooner
that fact is made known the better it will be
for all concerned. At present students, at
leasi those in executive positions, and probably
some members of Faculty, are wasting valuable
time wondering what is going to happen. If,
on the other hand, the situation is not as bad
as it has been made to appear, that is all the
more reason for making public all the facts.
If something can be done why not do it openly
instead of acting as though every group was
suspicious of every other group.
The University is a public institution; a reduction in the legislative grant such as has
been proposed would affect everyone connected with the institution; it is therefore
everybody's business and everybody is entitled
to know what is being done. Some people are
beginning to think that even a hash, hash
policy would be preferable to the present hush,
hush variety.
IN UNITY THERE IS STRENGTH
Elsewhere in this paper appears an editorial reprinted from the University of Toronto
"Varsity." In effect this article suggests that
other Canadian universities are prepared to
come to the aid of U.B.C. in the financial crisis which is threatening it. That such an idea
has recognition of wider soope than among the
editorial writers of the "Varsity" is proved by
the fact that the president of the Alma Mater
Society here has already received a letter from
the president of the N.F.C.U.S. asking if that
organization can be of any assistance to the
Pacific Coast college in its hour of need.
This action on the part of the University of
Toronto and the N.F.C.U.S. is probably unique
in the history of Canadian universities. Whether or not the students outside British Columbia can be of any practical assistance to those
at U.B.C, the gesture is one which should gladden the heart of every university man and
woman in Canada.
More than 2000 miles of prairie and mountain separate Toronto and Vancouver. The traditions of the university there differ from those
of U.B.C. The interests of the Toronto students are not the same as those of British Columbians. And yet within a few days of the
announcement of trouble on the Pacific Coast,
concrete evidence is forthcoming that the students there are prepared to come to the aid
of their less fortunate western colleagues.
There are more than 50,000 university students in Canada and if this prompt action on
the part of Toronto can be taken as an example of the cooperation which may be expected from other Canadian colleges then there
seems no reason why the N.F.C.U.S; cannot
develop into a very real force.
LET'S DO IT NOW
A great deal of discussion concerning the
Totem and whether or not it should be published at all this year took place before Christmas. This discussion delayed to some extent
a start being made on the necessary work.
The Totem editors this year are therefore
working under an additional handicap to the
many which have fallen to the lot of their
predecessors.
Under these circumstances students will
realise the importance of submitting all the
material required for the annual promptly,
that is, either on or before the date set as the
dead line. If the Totem staff cannot get the
n i:, ir y material, it means one of two things.
Either the book will be published in an incomplete iorm or it will come out at a later
dcto than that which has been set. The disadvantage of putting out an incomplete record
must be obvious to everyone.
In fact, such an annual would sacrifice a
great part of its value. If, on the other hand,
it were to be issued later in the term than
has been anticipated, it would be a very serious
matter for the editorial staff, since it would
involve jeopardising their marks in the spring
examinations. Moreover, experience has shown
that unless the Totem is on sale well ahead
of the examination period the number of copies
which will be sold is likely to be materially
affected. If this happens, a direct loss to the
whole student' body, both those who purchase
annuals and those who do not, will result. It
should therefore be plain that it is to every individual's advantage to cooperate with the
Totem staff to the fullest extent of hisw her
ability. This can be done by handing in all
requested information at the earliest possible
date.
An interesting article by K. Ikuta on the
Manchurian problem appeared in The Ubyssey recently.    The writer presents a strong
case for his country.
The Unruly        Granted that the situation in
Citizen Manuchuria   needed   attention,
Mr. Ikuta does not explain how
Japan was justified in taking extensive military action and in defying the League of Nations. Why was not the consent and co-operation of China and the other League powers
sought? At the time I began to think that
Japan must be dominated by a militaristic
"junker" class, similar to that which controlled
Germany before the war. A Japanese friend,
however, tells me that such an idea is incorrect, that stories about the Japanese military staff being able to oppose and nullify
policies of the foreign office are untrue. In
fact, according to my friend, Japan is as democratic as the western democracies, and the only
untoward influence on her government is the
same one that keeps a guiding hand on the policies of western nations—the influence of the
big capitalists.
That influence may account for the Manchurian invasion, and also for the failure of the
League to employ an economic blockade
against Japan. Over the week-end came the
news that a Japanese fleet was menacing
Shanghai, demanding cessation of the boycott
and of hostile demonstrations. Whatever excuses there may be for her unwise action in
Manchuria, this latest move of Japan's is astounding. If the Chinese do not want to trade
with Japan, that is their business, and Japan
has no right to try to make them do so. Surely
the League will not tolerate further developments along this line. If it does, one must incline strongly to the view of a local high school
student, referred to in this column last term,
that we must have Socialism before there can
be peace and co-operation between nations.
"Out of the mouths of babes .... "
In the actions of western powers during the
period of imperialistic expansion, Japan has
precedent for all she has done. Japan ignores
the fact, however, that there is no point in
harking back to such precedents. The Great
War climaxed that period of international rivalry and imperialism. The world has not suddenly entered the millenium, but there is a
great new world force, the League of Nations,
to which Japan has subscribed, and there are
certain treaties, intended to guarantee peace,
to which Japan has also subscribed. This
League and these treaties opened a new era,
an era demanding a greater degree of civilized conduct between nations. Japan is showing herself to be a rather unruly world citizen,
and that ought to be of greater concern to her
than the interests of a few profiteers—for a
policy of militarism and antagonism is not in
the real interests of a people.
I should be glad to hear from any of our
Japanese friends who can point out anything
unjust in what I have said.
Recently we learned that a heavy cut in the
government grant to the University may be
expected.   The news caused a stir throughout
the province, and several news-
In Time papers have already voiced vigor-
Of Trouble   ous opposition.   Naturally friends
of the University are anxious that
this institution, brought progressively to its
present position of prestige and ability to serve
N.F.C.U.S. DROPS BUREAU
SCHEME OF ADVERTISING
(Continued from Page One)
the administrative. At Toronto the
President of the AMS is a graduate
not connected with the University at
all at the time of his appointment.
As regards the liability of student
societies for public and private property damage, the majority of the
councils got around the difficulty by
asking the person who suffered the
damage to furnish names of offending students. If this cannot be done,
and usually it is impossible, no action need be taken. The only case
where U.B.C. has had to use its funds
for an emergency of this sort was
when an old man was forced back
till he tripped over the curb and fractured his hip.
'PINNIE" CHORUS TO BE
SELECTED NEXT PRACTICE
(Continued from Page One)
tices have begun, every rehearsal is
important. Members should not absent themselves from practices without an excuse.
Practices for the week are as follows:
Tuesday 12-1 App. Sc. 100—strings.
Wednesday 12-1 App. Sc. 100—
principals and  understudies.
Thursday 12-1 Stage—brass and
woodwinds.
Thursday 4-6 Stage—ensemble and
oi'chestra .
Thursday 6-9 Stage—men's chorus
and Buttercup.
Thursday 6-7:30 App. Sc. 100—or-
hestra.
Friday 12-1 App. Sc. 100-ensemble.
Saturday 1:15 Stage—choral ensemble.
H.M.S. PINAFORE
z
On top with
turret:
Turrets help overcome
your difficulties . . .
because Turrets rise to
every occasion. In any
emergency their wonderful
qualities come out on top.
^p^T   Mild and Fraqrant
I u rret
CICAKEf TES
CLASS AND CLUB NOTES
INT. REL. CLUB
Members are reminded of the annual meeting at the "Cat and Parrot" tea room on Wednesday, January 27, at 8 p.m. All those Intending to attend please notify Miss
Margaret Black,  Fees are now due.
PACIFIC AREA CONFERENCE
The first meeting this term of the
Pacific Area Discussion group will
ba held on Friday, January 30 nt
3 p.m. at the home of Miss Margaret Muirhead, 2818 Fifth Avenue
West.
Following a series of addresses last
term on Japan, the topics for this
term's meetings will deal largely
with China, and her contribution to
civilization. Mr. Moore Whaun will
be  the speaker at the first meeting.
An interesting feature of the evening will be the showing of moving
pictures of the Pacific Area Conference held last June at Bowen Island.
Any student on the Campus who
is interested in the relationships of
the countries surrounding the Pacific Basin will be cordially welcomed  at  these  meetings.
1
RADIO SECTION
There will be a meeting of the
Radio Section Tuesday noon in
Mech. 109,
A. I. E. E.
A meeting of the student branch
of A.I.E.E. will be held on Tuesday,
January 26, at 7:30 in M.E. Ill, J. D.
Mitchell will give a paper on "Dust
Precipitation," W. Smith on "Radiq
Broadcasting Control," and H. G.
Freedman on "Photoeletric Cells."
All interested are invited to attend.
CHEMISTRY SOCIETY
A closed meeting of the Society
will be held at the home of Mr.
Alan Cameron, 3989 West 13th Avenue on Wednesday, January 27 at
8 p.m. Papers will be read by Mr.
Desmond Beall, Mr. Percy Easier,
and Mr. Tom Niven.
U.B.C. GUIDE CLUB
Dean Bollert and Mrs. Don Munday were guest speakers at the
meeting of the U. B. C. Guide Club
held Thursday, January 21 at the
home  of  Margaret  Rathie.
Miss Bollert gave a short talk on
Ihe work and training of the Guide
movement as preparation for the
place that women take ln the world
today, and on the fine aims of the
U. B. C. Club to keep in touch with
the Guide movement.
Trips which she took to Mount
Waddington in 1926-28, were recounted by Mrs. Munday, who started the
Lone Guide Movement. Mount Waddington, formerly called "Mystery
Mountain" is the highest peak in
B. C. Mrs. Munday passed around
splendid photographs taken of this
mountain and the surrounding district.
V. C. V.
On Sunday, January 31, the Varsity Christian Union will conduct
the evening service at Mount Pleasant Baptist Church. The speakers
are members of the Union and have
a message especially for University
students. Daily meetings are held
at noon in Arts 204, and all interested are invited to attend.
CORRECTION
The Ubyssey wishes to correct the
statement made a week ago that the
Co-ed Ball of last year netted $200.
This should have read "Hi-Jinks last
year  netted  $200.
C. O. T. C. NOTICE
The Corps parade on Wednesday.
January 27 at Beatty Stre-.t Drill
Hall must be as strong as possible.
All those who cannot possibly attend must secure leave of absence
by presenting themselves at the
C.OVT.C. Orderly Room befoie this
date.
Those members who have not yet
been issued with uniforms and
equipment will report to the Q. M.
store at their earliest convenience
to be fitted and fully equipped.
Members are reminded of the necessity of looking at the various notice boards for orders as may be issued from time to time.
A lecture to "A" and "B" candidates will be held January 28th in
Room 208 Applied Science Building.
The list in the Orderly Room must
be signed as usual. Candidates are
reminded that this is the last lecture before the Examination January
31st.
The following members have been
selected to shoot in the first Intor-
University Match on Wednesday,
January 27 at 8:00 p.m. Any other
members who have done miniature
rifle shooting and who did not fire
the selection practice last week notify the Orderly Room.
RQMS R. H. Jorgensen, CQMS R.
B. Leeson, Sgt. D. M. Smith, Sgt. R.
G. Stewart-Lough, Sgt. D. G. Worth-
ington, Cpl. J. A. Shaneman, Cpl.
F. C. Thorneloe, Cdt. L. M. Stewart,
Cdt. F.H. Dawe, Cdt. J.D. McMynn,
Cdt. H. Ormsby, Cdt. J. C. Warren,
Cdt. E. D. James, Cdt. R. B. Bromi-
ley, Cdt. N. F. Moodle.
NOTICE
Freshman Class fees of $1,00 are
due Wednesday noon at the box office in the quad. Members of Arts
'35 are urged to pay as soon as possible.
L'ALOUETTE
The next meeting of L'Alouette
will be held on Tuesday, January
26, at 8 o'clock at the home of Mrs.
Baird, 1391 Nanton Avenue.
PHYSICS CLUB
A   meeting   of   the   Physics   Club
will be held at Z: 10 p.m. in Gaienco
£J9, en Wei.n.:sdjy, January 27, when
Bob Armstrong will speak on 'Die-
sol Engines" and Ron Makepeace
will discuss "Oxygen in the Spectrum of the Solar Corona." All interested are  invited to attend.
LETTERS CLUB
The Letters Club meeting will be
held at the home ot Mrs. F. C.
Walker, 3491 Thirty-seventh Avenue
West, on Tuesday. The paper "Cop-
pard," will be given by Miss Dorothea Lundell. Members are requested to turn in all outstanding Chap
Book   receipts.
ART CLUB
At the meeting of the Art Club
tonight, Tuesday, Professor Boving
will give an address on "Swedish
Art," illustrated by numerous photographs and prints. The meeting will
be held at the home of Miss Muriel
Christie, 1440 Matthews Avenue, at
8:15 p.m.- -
LOST—1 Polyphase Slide Rule. Please
return to Book Store.—W. J. Tough.
LITERARY SUPPLEMENT
The Literary Supplement to
the Ubyssey will be published
on February 8. Contributions
are requested in the form of
poems, short short stories, book
reviews, or articles of a literary
or artistic Interest Contributions should be handed in to
the Literary Editor, Mollle
Jordan, not later than Friday,
February 5.
A beautiful young woman entered
the outer office and asked if Mr.
Jones was busy. "Well, yes," replied
the secretary, "but he is always
pleased to see pretty girls like you."
"Kindly tell him his wife is here."
From Washington State College
comes the news that nine fraternities
were robbed of $2000 in furniture
and cash during one evening. Unless the thieves are apprehended,
frat. men on the campus will organize all-night guards for their protection.
the educational needs of the people, should not
be crippled in its work.
The proposed curtailment has aroused sympathetic interest throughout the rest of the
country, especially in other universities. The
Alberta 'Gateway' featured the news with a
front page streamer. The Toronto 'Varsity'
ran an editorial in which, in its traditional
forthright style, it urged the Canadian universities to do all they can to help the University
of British Columbia. It asked that the National
Federation of Canadian University Students
take the matter up, and consider in what ways
assistance may be given. The "Varsity" thinks
that curtailment at U.B.C. would not only be
a misfortune to the province, but a blow to the
educational life of the country.
Bonds between this university and those in
other provinces have been growing stronger as
contacts have been encouraged in sport and
debating. Now the student papers are forming a press union. Even yet, however, many
students on this campus do not fully realize
that they share a community of interests and
purposes with thousands of others from coast
to coast, in common with whom they have an
important part to play in the development of
the country. This feelingly outspoken sympathy from Toronto will strengthen the bonds
between east and west, and the N.F.C.U.S., if
it gives active support, will acquire a more
vital significance than it has ever had before. Tuesday, January 26, 1932
THE UBYSSEY
Page Three
i
POLICY: To provide plenty of puns for the professors in this period of
poverty and pink tooth brush.
Litany Coroner
■
CO-CO
Paper,
Reams of it.
All over the floor.
Torn, tattered,
All over the floor.
And CO-CO
Throwing it on high,
And  watching  it,
With   gleeful   smile
As it descends.
So now I know
Why
He is called
CO-CO,
H.M.S. PINAFORE
U. B. C. Amazed At
Sox'Freedom
Strange enough, I was walking
from one lecture to another 'tother
day—no, it wasn't—yes, it was; oh,
well, have it your way—and I heard
someone say, "Have you seen Earl
Vance's socks question mark." And
the other fellow—or was it the same
fellow another question mark—no,
no, it was another fellow—said "You
mean the purple ones with the red
and  white  squares  question  mark"
Now I can't Imagine anybody losing a pair of socks like that. Can
you question mark. But if anybody
did lose them in a moment of men
tal aberration, I am sure somebody
would find them. Things like that
cannnot be hidden for long. It anybody sees them floating around (providing said person is not suffering
from a binge), will they please turn
them into the Muek staff question
mark. We would like them for a
souvenir.
, Ed. Note: We regret that one of
our typewriters has not the facilities
for printing interrogation marks.
H.M.S. PINBEHIND
Canada's National
Jewellers
We carry a full line of
Fountain Pens — Parker,
Waterman, Shaeffer and
Wahl.
MAKE "BIRKS"  YOUR
"DOWNTOWN MEETING
PLACE!"
BIRKS
Contract Closes
The great bridge game is ended.
McGoofus and his partner, Co-Co,
after trailing in the rear for the past
three weeks, picked up their skirts
and srinted down the home stretch
to win by a nose.
The most thrilling hand of the
whole tournament occurred last
night, Von Nurtz dealt. He passed,
Co-Co passed, C. de S. passed, McGoofus passed, Pippa passed and
37.9 per cent, passed. The cards
were dealt again; this time by Co-
Co. ,He bid two clubs, deScrepancie
made it three, McGoofus followed
with a four bid and Von Nurtz
pushed it up to five clubs.
The room became silent, the air
tense. It was Co-Co's bid. He
studied the faces of his opponents.
He obtained a mirror .and studied
his own. Then his hand travelled
slowly to his sleeve. A quick pass
of his two middle fingers produced
a rabbit, a silk hat, an egg, and a
handkerchief—but no clubs. He was
non-plushed.     He    doubled    Nurtz.
Co-Co himself explained the details of that hand to the press immediately  after  the  game.
"Von Nurtz," he said, "under-the
Impression that it was his lead,
played the ace of clubs. After he
had been severely reprimanded by
the third assistant referee, nis partner led the ace of clubs. I trumped
it, and led the king of clubs. This
was trumped in turn by my partner;
Von Nurtz led the ace of hearts,
which I took with the joker.
"Three tricks later, I found I had
no more cards, as I had had to drop
quite a few clubs on the floor in
order  to  trump  them.
"It is in just such a situation that
the supremacy of the card-in-the-
sleeve becomes apparent to the most
ignorant. Where would anybody else
have been? I ask you. If you reply, please enclose a stamped envelope.
"I provided myself with a few
cards from my sleeve, and the game
went merrily on. This time the opponents went out of business. I laid
down the straight flush in my hand,
and  claimed  the  pot.
The Fishsoup
Mystery
By M. E.
Contest Judges Decide
Prize*Winning Rhymes
The following are the prize-winners in the recent limerick
contest sponsored by Litany Recreations Limited:
FIRST PRIZE:—Round-the-world walking-tour, won by
H. G. Thomas, Arts '33.  The prize limerick follows:
"A chemistry student  named Pete
Thought up an idea on heat.
He planned how to use
All the stray B.T.U.'s
To recook his landlady's meat.
SECOND PRIZE:—1930-1931 stack permit.   Won by the
Letters Club.
. A Senior of Arts '32
Saw a Frosh coming out of the zoo,
He turned in his stride
And jeeringly cried,
"Are the zoo-keepers 'rushing' you, too?"
THIRD PRIZE:—Bus certificate. Winner can have same
by applying at the Registrar's office.   Won by M. I. Good, a
shallow-brained Scienceman.
A co-ed who took EngUsh 10
Cut lectures again and again.
When asked why she missed,
In answer she hissed,
"I have to sit too near ,the men."
The Ridgewell
Lending Library
OVER 3000 BOOKS
3494 Dunbar (near 19th)
Tel. Bay. 7SIO
The following win honorable mention:
A man of the C. O. T. C.
One day took a co-ed to tea,
In the cafeteria
He saw his superia
With another co-ed on his knee.
A co-ed who took English 10
Cut  lectures again and  again.
The  interest  had  shifted
From words of the gifted
To gifts from susceptible men.
A man of the C. O. T. C,
One clay took a co-ed to tea;
But  on  reading  the  "Sun"
He realized what he'd'done
And entered  a  reformatree.
A  chemistry   student  named   Pete
Thouglit up an idea on heat;
He stood on a hot plate
Drank   hydrogen  sulfate
And toasted his lunch on his feet.
A co-ed who took English 10
Cut lectures  again  and again;
When she was asked why,
She said,  "They're  so  dry
There ain't never no ink in my
pen."
Rogers Bldg. Barber Shop
The   finest   ln   Canada—18   chairs.
Special attention to Varsity students.
Ladies Beauty Parlor
464 Granville Street
Phone: Seymour 155
Sasamat
Barber Shop
Our Motto IS Satisfaction
Ladies' and Gentlemen's
Haircutting
4473 10th Avenue West
Students' Special
for the Particular Student
Geo. T. Wadds
PORTRAITS
$6.00 PER DOZEN
Studio: Ground Floor
1318 Granville St.
Sey. 1002
"Trapped," gasped Blowout with
a giggle, He lit another cigarette.
Suddenly he began turning out his
pockets—a crust of bread, a piece
of string, a copy of Physics 59 exams
for twenty-four years ago, an X-ray
machine, fourteen revolvers, an Ink
bottle and a cup of coffee, which he
drank softly in the key of H minor.
All of a once he gave a whoop,
unstrapped his wrist watch, and
smashed it in the name of duty. He
removed the main spring, and set
to work to pick the lock.
Three days later the door creaked
open with a horrible jerk. "Success!" murmured Blowout as he lit
a cigarette. But the words died on
his lips before he had uttered them.
Eight husky Chinamen stood clustered around the figure of Suey, who
had opened the door with his key.
"Seize them," purred Chang,
snatching at a cigarette Blowout
had just lit.
We were seized, and our hands
tied behind our ears with pieces of
spaghetti. Blowout begged for a
cigarette, but was refused.
Chang's minions cast us into a
gloomy dungeon. After hours of
struggling, Blowout, who has always
been noted for his Herculean
strength, managed to break his spaghetti bonds. He hunted for a cigarette, but couldn't find one, He
ground his teeth in rage, seized the
powder, and smoked it in a spaghetti   tube,
Later I awoke to the sound of
horrible groans, yells, shrieks, moan-
ings, hoots, etc. Horrible thoughts
of my Impending visit to the dentist
arose in my mind. Then, with a
gasp, a quiver, three shake| and a
shiver, I realized I was alone!
1    thought    of    poor   Blowout.    I
Sciencemen Should Study This
When she is bored EXCITER
If she gets too exerted CONTROLLER
If she won't come when you want her to COAXER
If she is willing to come half way METER
If she is willing to come all the way RECEIVER
If she was too fast to stop DISPATCHER
If she is an angel TRANSFORMER
If she is a devil CONVERTER
If she tries to double-cross you DETECTOR
If she proves your fears are wrong COMPENSATOR
If fears are right ARRESTER
If she goes up in the air   CONDENSER
If she becomes upset REVERSER
If she is hungry .....FEEDER
If she sings foully TUNER
If she gets cold HEATER
If she gets too warm COOLER
If she is a NICE girl SHOCKER
If you have one just like her ALTERNATOR
If she is too fat REDUCER
If she fumes and sputters INSULATOR
And when you get tired of her ELECTROCUTOR
—The Tech Flash
PARLOR PRANKS
by CYRWS DE SCREPANCIE
In rosponse to innumerable requests for an outline of practical
parlor games for parties, I have condescended to write this article. My
first game is called "Can;on-the-
head," and is played as follows:
One of the party seats himself in
the centre of the room. A bootjack
is brought in and placed before him.
A large can is brought into the room
and rammed securely over his head.
The can should be as tight a fit as
possible. The onlookers are divided
into two sides. One group takes a
firm hold on the bootjack; the other
group attaches itself to thc person
wearing the can. The can is then
wedged into the V of the bootjack
and both sides commence a tug-of-
war. The next person whet volunteers to be "it" wins the game.
My next game is called "Revolution" and is very amusing. The prerequisites are sufficient redcaps and
torches to provide each player. A
realistic touch may be added by
painting a red gullotlne on the parlor wall Each player dons his or
h°r red cap, lights the torch and
iushes about the rdom crying, "Vive
la France!" "Down with the Arls-
tos." 'We want beer!!' .and other
treasonable phrases. When everyone
is sufficlenly exhausted a truce is
proclaimed, I'v.r.ng which tuch pl.ty-
er carefully sets fire to some article
of furniture in the room. The player who first arrives at the fire alarm
wins the game.
My third and last game is "Chicago" and is perhaps the most entertaining of all from the onlookers
standpoint.
One of : the players is proclaimed
"it." He or she is given a large .45
revolver and stands at one end of
tht room. A red spot is painted on
the rug. The players ono by one,
step on the spot and are shot down
by the perso.i who is "it" Sometimes this player takes two or even
three shots before the person on thc
spot is shot. This makes .!u game
intriguing.
After all the other players are
dead, the operator of the '45 phones
for the coroner and then commits
suicide, thus bringing to a close a
very pleasant evening.
Ed. Note: Remember, we didn't
ask you to read this.
CRUMBS
from
The College Bred
Remember, you can always fall
back in the street-car.
* »   »
In keeping with the popular custom of considering economy cuts,
Students' Council is discussing the
curtailment of social activities this
spring. The Senior Ball, the Science
'35 party, the Science Ball and the
Freshman hop are no longer certainties. The Science Ball especially is
as liable to come off as the ink spots
on my suit. Although the idea is
about as popular as noon-hour lectures, it has its advantages. We
might "create a favorable impression
in the public eye" and this is much
to be desired. Of course, once the
university was out of danger we
could switch back to the old program and enjoy ourselves as we
have been for the last decade or so.
By all means, we must act like tlie
good little boy before Christmas.
* «   •
No, Dora, the S.C.M. series of addresses entitled "A New Social Order" has nothing to do with Council's new social program.
* *   *
A student who enrolled for one of
the short courses in Agriculture
claims that his expenses per week
were as low as two dollars. He slept
in one of the Aggie sheds and was
able to eat a balanced diet of proteins, carbohydrates, etc. Why
shouldn't regular students do this?
There are numerous Aggie barns,
and if enough did it, I am certain
the cafeteria management would include proteins and calories on its
menu.
I,
is
"Just Where the Bus Stops"
>. G. 67 Night Calls Elliott 1208
K. E. PATTERSON
Public Stenographer
4479—10th Avenue W.
Manuscripts, Essays,, Theses, Etc.
Mimeoi
"1 Make a
_  — Multigraphlng
food Essay Better"
 BltS. PINBEHIND
"Eat .When
OP
LIKE"
Sandwiches   10c
Tea, Coffee or Milk 5c
Varsity Tea Room
4605—10th Ave. W.
thought of his vain attempts to learn
to inhale. And I sobbed. Possibly
it was my turn next.
And then my hair rose on end.
No small feat that, because its rather
long. I had seen a ghost! From a
corner of the room that had previously been absolutely empty, the
figure of Blowout had arisen! A
face, pale as death itself, was
streaked with blood, testifying to the
awful tortures he must have gone
through. A long black shroud
seemed to cover the rest of his body.
Bloodshot eyes stared out from beneath a tangled mass of hair. The
horrifying figure gave a ghastly
groan. So did I. For I had seen the
last awful detail. Wreathed around
his face were wisps of mist, or were
they emanations from the other
world he had come from? A cold
wind groped around me, touching
my face with its clammy breath.
(TO   BE   CONTINUED)
Alleged Jokes
The minister had been impressing
upon the children at the Sunday
School the real necessity for being
good and obedient at all times. At the
conclusion of his address he asked,
"Now, children, can any of you tell
me what kind of boys and girls go
to heaven?"
One fellow shouted out, "Dead
ones."
George: You are always wishing for
what you haven't got.
Joyce: Well, what else can I wish
for?
"Well,   old   boy,   how's  the   world
treating you."
"About as often as I could expect."
H.M.S. PINBEHIND
OVERHEARD AT
HOLLYWOOD
"You can count me out, Mr. Director, I thought at first that I'd like to
act in this movie but I guess I can't
do it."
"What? You're going to drop it altogether. My dear man, you can do
nothing of the kind. You're about the
best man in the cast and we couldn't
do without you. And why wait till
now to tell me, when everything is
all set for final rehearsal. You have
a little touch of stage fright, that's
all."
"No it isn't stage fright, I just don't
like my part and I can't go through
with it."
"Scared of gettin' your neck
stretched a bit in the first act when
you're left hanging on the gallows,
eh? Well, we'll see if we can get the
heroine to come on a little sooner
and cut you down. But remember she
has to come all the way from the
Indian camp."
"Oh no, I wouldn't mind that, at
all. It gives me time to compose myself for the next bit of acting."
"Then it's the next part you don't
like is it? The I$ndians will only
throw a few tomahawks at you, and
anyway they're good shots. I'll tell
'em not to tie the ropes too tight.
Surely you're not scared of a little
fire. You'll be rescued from the flames
before it gets too hot."
"I can manage that all right. It's not
that that's bothering me."
"I suppose it's when you have to
too,  would like to do a bit of
free advertising.    When it comes to
town,  be  sure   to   see   "A   Broken
Arm" with a big cast.
•   •   *
Measles.     The   University   Health
Service   requests   students   to   report
the   slightest   indisposition—even   the
common   cold,    The   trouble   is,   the
common cold  is so common  that  if
the  students  did   realize  their   duty
to the Health Service, the lineup outside Aud. 306 would run from there
to here.   And the nurses would run
from   here  to   there.    But   that
neither here nor there.
• •   •
"Lv'e been trying to get hold of
you all evening," said one wrestler
to another
• *   *
Said the coach, "What's the matter
with  you  guys,   you   look   like   a
bunch of amateurs."
• *   •
"The University supports one hundred and forty odd professors and
assistants." That's from a last week's
editorial-in The Ubyssey. I maintain
that only a hundred and thirty-nine
are odd. Nothing was said concerning the ten odd librarians.
-T. H.
H M.S. PINAFORE
Have You Got the
MEASLES?
H.M.S. PINAFORE
A mid-western University tells the
romantic tale of how, in the spring
term of 1931, no fewer than fifteen
men belonging to one fraternity
married fifteen girls of a single sorority.
"Potatoes are cheaper,
Tomatoes are cheaper,
Now Is the  time to fall   in   love!"
H.M.S. PINBEHIND
WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING
Dr. Ashton: I'd better not say
anything else or it will be used
for copy.
Tom How: I didn't think you'd
find me. I was lost in thought
Dean Brock: A horse is noticeably different from a cow in
many respects.
Charlie Bruce: Spring Is coming!
fall from the tree when you're shot
Drunk: What are you looking for? by an arrow. We'll have a mattress
Cop: Drowned man, for you to drop on and you won't
Drunk: Whatcha want one for? hurt yourself much."
"It's not that either. It's in the last
act."
"The last act. Why you timid,
chicken-hearted poltroon, there isn't a
thing yoc have to do in the third act
except sit at the table and eat your
dinner. You're supposed to be recovering from the dread disease of scurvy
and you're still sick. You don't have
to say a word."
"No but look what I have to eat
to chase my scurvy away. Two heaping plates of spinach. No slree, I can't
go through with it."
Drink
BLOWOUT'S
BEEF TEA
—a certain cure for measles,
mumps, water on the knee,
water on the brain, water in
the gas tank and water pal you
turned out to be!
Two teaspoonfuls a day will lift
you out of your bed. Four tea-
spoonfuls a day keeps the doctor away if you can persuade
him to take it.
This advt. is not displayed by the
B.C. Undertaking Parlors Ltd.
H.M.S. PINBEHIND
J Page Four
THE UBYSSEY
Tuesday, January 26, 1932
CAMPUS   SPORTS
Soccerites
Score 5-0
Vanity's senior soccermtn administered a substantial coat of whitewash to the Point Orey United squad
on Saturday at McBride perk when
they romped home to a 5-0 victory.
This win puts tho Blue and Oold team
in third place in the league tables,
and alao points to a Victory for tha
collegians when they encounter tht
Suburbanites again ia their replay ef
thc protested first round cup gam* in
the near future.
Frost and aim combined to render
the field a sea of mud, and the pall
soon assumed the apptaranee of a
large and slippery cannon ball, Quite
a ftw tniskleks came ai a result of
tht sloppy conditions, but Varsity
wart quicker at adapting themselves
to tht slow field and toon demonstrated a decided superiority in bell
control.
After a ptrlot of sloshing back, and
forth through tht mun, Captain Paul
Kosoolln celebrated hla transfer to
tht centre forward position by notch-
ing Varsity's first counter. Dave Tpdd
next moved into tht limelight with
another shot which tht Point Orty
iustodlan failed to hlld, tht slippery
pigskin gliding away from his eager
clutches in a vary annoying fashion.
McDohgal than mada his presence felt
in no uncertain manner whtn ht
added a third goal from twenty yards
out which gave tha aforementioned
net-minder no chance whatever. With
tht score 3-0 and half time only a
few minutes away, Kozoolin headed
the heavy ball direct from a sizzling
goal kick and was knocked out Ht
was forced to leave the field suffering considerably from concussion, and
being unable to return was replaced
by Jlmmie Smith after tre interval.
The opposition put up a better
argument in the second half and play
was fairly even for some time. Varsity
finally took control, however, and
after a goal being dissallowed on the
grounds of offside, Jlmmie Smith
proved himself a very useful substitute by chaulking up the fourth
counter. From then on the Blue and
Gold squad monopolized the play till
the end of the ond of the game and
Mundie increased their score to the
total of five with an unstoppable
cross shot. The final whistle found the
ball in mid-field.
Archie McDougal turned in another
stellar performance and was again the
most outstanding player on the field.
Paul Kozoolin showed up favorably
in his new position at centre, and the
entire forward line showed a much
greater finish that indicates an improvement in the line of goal-getting
in the future. The backs and half
backs turned in a sound defensive
exhibition which forced the Point
Grey boys to register the proverbial
goose egg for their goal average,
The team: Frattinger; McGill, Grant;
Wright, Costain, McDougal; Waugh,
Munday, Kozoolin and J. Smith; D.
Todd and L. Todd.
JUNIOR TEAM WINS
Varsity Junior Soccer team obtained
a further two points in the standing
when Victoria Road defaulted to them
Saturday afternoon.
This gives the team a good chance
to raise themselves another place in
the standing before the season is over,
a prospect which was very remote a
few weeks .ago. Victoria Road is now
very little ahead of them, while the
remaining games on the schenule are
with the weakr teams of the league.
POT SHOTS
FROM THE PRESS BOX
Inter-class sport on the campus
has been under way for several
weeks, but the amount of interest
shown has been pathetic. In our
opinion competition between the different years should be a big drawing card, and it may be that our
august selves are at fault for failing
to give the contests the publicity
that they deserve. WeTl we can til-
ways remedy that.
* *   *
We have a letter from some person
(ir persons) who has (have) failed
to reveal his (their) identity, which
protests against action of the senior
A basketball team in taking the gym
at hours which have not been al-
loted to the squad. Failure of the
author to affix his name to the masterpiece makes it necessary for us
to refrain  from  printing  the epistte
itself.
* *   *
But we believe that the new
schedule of hours for the gym will
alleviate the misunderstandings of
the past.
INTERMEDIATE
CAGERS DEFEAT
POO PAD SQUAD
Varsity caytrs chalked up another
victory when tht fast stepping Intermediate "A" squad handed tht Holy
Trinity Doo Dads a 52-266 trouncing
at King Edward gym last Friday. With
only three men on hand at tht start
of the contest, tht iollegians wtrt
forred to call upon George Kellett,
who happened to be a spectator, and
Dong. Raid, tht trstwhllt manager.
Fortunately tht remainder of the
squad put in an appearance before
tht gam* was far gone, and tht students stepped out to run up a M-9
load In tht flrat half.
Tht stclnd canto was a rtpllca of
tht opening frame, with the blue and
gold squad having Utile difficulty in
breaking through tht church squad's
defense. Crowder at usual turned In
a fine game as did McDougal at guard.
DR. MILTON THORPE
When Dr. Milton Thorpe leaves
for Keloiona this week the University oj B. C, will lose a staunch
supporter For the past year Dr.
Thorpe hay, been acting as pliysician
to the Varsity busl\>tball s<ptad and
it was hir(icli) because of his untiring effort.: thr.t tha Blue and Gold
hoopsters were in sue)', wonderful
condition for the Canadian playoffs
last year.
While he has received no monetary
consideration, the genial doctor Ims
never failed to be .on .hand .to/ten
needed, and his presence at each of
the U. B. C. practices has been an
inspiration to the hoopsters. Undoubtedly on his arrival, in Keloiona
Dr. Thorpe will acquaint himself
with basketball in the Orchard City,
and his efforts should boost the indoor pastime in the Interior.
It is understood that .a .successor
has been suggested by Dr. Thorp*; to
fill the vacancy he will leave.
NOTICE
In future no sport cony will
be accepted unless handed into
the "Ubyssey" office before
noon of the day previous to
which the article is to appear.
All club secretaries will please
see that notices or news stories
are handed in before that time.
Comments From Here and There
on lnter<Clq$s Spwts
BY DAY WASHINGTON
Up to the time of going to
press, news as to interclass basketball was conspicuous by its
absence. There Is apparently
no official knowledge forthcoming concerning the men's games
and officially they might as
well Have not been played,
then again in the majority of
games playact io far there has
been no referee, and at least
one game was not played, according to schedule. M} this
points either to inefficiency or
of those in charge; and as we
are inclined to rule out ineffl-
clency as a cause We make so
bold as to say that the organ!-
zatlon could be made considerably stronger,
• • •
Tht first round of tht Soccer Cud
tompttitloh will git under way tomorrow tt noon on tht upper playing field whtn Arts '84, ont of tht
strongest of tht cultured contenders,
will meet Sc. '34 who art reckoned
to be tht pick of the red shirted
division. Tht winners of this match
ought to go a long way in the race
for tht cup, and tht game should
certainly provide pltnty of action
for tht spectators.
Five lucky teams drew byes in the
first round, three from the Science
league together with Education and
the Anglican Theological College
from the Arts section.    The  series
will be comprised of first and second rounds, semi-final and final for
a total of ten games. With the
weather man apparently in a favourable mood, everything points to
an interesting and exciting round of
hostilities, before tht ownership of
tht coveted trophy ia finally settled.
Following is a detailed copy of
tht first and second rounds,
Flrsl round: Arts '34 vs. Sc. '34,
Wednesday, January if, at noon;
Arts 11 vs. Arts '3| Thursday, January 31, at noon: Arts '38 vs. Aggies,
Friday, January St, at noon; Byes—
Education, Sc. '33, A.T.C., Sc. '31
land St. '38.
Second round: Education vs. Sc.
'St; A.T.C vs. S. 'St: Sc. *» vs. Arts
'38 or Aggtti; Arts 'S4 or Sc. '34 vs.
Arts 'S3 or Arts '83. Dates to be
announced later.
All games will be played on tht
upper pitying field.
• » •
Here art a few suggestions tor Ath-
letlc Reps who are to charge of the
inter-data totter teams.
1. Be certain that each member of
your team knows btfort tht game
whet posttton ht ia to play lid thus
•void any confusion which might delay the start ef the game.
1 Impress upon your players tha
necessity of being on tine tor the
match as all games ia future will
start STRICTLY ON TIME.
3. Advise your players to make
arrangements beforehand for their
strip.
Make a cartful note of who your
playing, when your playing and where
your playing. ABOVE ALL SEE THAT
YOUR TEAM TAKES THE HELD ON
TIME.
NOTICE
There will be a meeting of all
class Athletic Reps in Arts 108 next
Friday at 12:05. The presidents of
the Soccer and Basketball Clubs are
also requested to attend.
The purpose of the meeting is to
endeavor to establish Inter-Class
sports on a sounder basis.
CANADIAN RUGBY
Pictures for Totem:
Big Four
Senior City
Interscholastic
Every man out at the gymnasium Wednesday,  12:15 p.m.
PLACING THE BLAME.
The Bystander-i-You saw that woman fall in the water. Why didn't you
pull her out instead of waiting till
she waa half drowned and scared
most to death?
The Movie Horo—I did all I could.
I telephoned for tht dlreotor and the
camera man and I couldn't begin
action till they arrived.
Lome Falconer
Vacates Chair
Of Basket Club
'Owing to pressure of studies, I
.vill have to resign from the Presidency of the Basketball Club,"
Lome Falconer told members at a
meeting held in Ihe gym Friday afternoon. The resignation was accepted.
Ex-President Falconer kept the
chair lo'ig enough to carry out thc
duties of electing a new leader. Two
men were suggested—Doug. McCrim-
nion, iccently appointed assistant
manager of the Senior "A" team,
and Arnie Powell. After some discission it was pointed out that
Powell was ineligible inasmuch as
he is already president of the Golf
Club, and would have to resign that
position if he wished to accept the
basketball job. Some members of
the club thought that Falconer was
out of order in conducting the meeting after he had resigned and as
there was only one candidate for the
position left, they deemed It advisable that another meeting be held
Friday, January 29, with vice-president Jimmy O'Nefl in the chair.
Only a handful of the Basketball
Club was present for the meeting
and as a result the chairman had a
(tough time maintaining order. However, the fog ot debate lifted long
enough for the boys to vote an expression ot thanks> to be presented
In the form of a gift to Dr. Milton
Thorpe, who has also announced his
resignation as coach. All members
of basketball teams are expected to
attend next Friday's meeting. The
position of President of the Club is
a responsible one and It Is hoped
that all players will give some consideration to the selection of the new
officer. The main requirements are
that he be an upper 'classman and
that he have a thorough knowledge
of the basket game.
Lome Falconer will be sadly
missed in basket circles. Elected
president of the club last year, he
acted in every capacity from manager to dressing-room flunkey.
Lome's interest in the team was
well rewarded when Varsity copped
the Dominion Championship. A
large part of the preparations for
the St. Catherines series fell upon
his shoulders. 11118 year Lome
branched out still further when in
Nanaimo, with the team one man
short, he donned strip and went on
as guard, When it was announced
that the manager would not be permitted to tratfle east with the team,
Lome turned out in practise with
hopes of catching a place on the
squad. With the issue of exam results, he resolved to turn student
and hand over the basketball reins.
Friends say that the genial ex-president will have a tough time staying
away from the squared court and
the   hoop,
Victoria Rugby
Squad to Play
Intermediates
Competition for places on the 2nd
division team is running high, for
the game of the season takes place
this Saturday, when Varsity plays
Victoria College at 2:15 at Brockton
Point, and from all reports the game
will  be stocked  with  thrills.
Victoria College has a team this
year that will take a lot of beating.
Gil Mcllmoyle, who coached Varsity's cup-winning team last year,
is coaching Victoria boys this season
and so far they have not lost a
game.
The Victoria team has players that
have held places on the Victoria
Rep. team, and if reports are true,
it is the strongest team they have
had for some time.
Varsity, however, is training hard.
There was an early morning practice
this Tuesday, while on Wednesday
afternoon, Bert Barratt, graduate
McKechnie Cup star, will be out to
coach the backs.
Players are to note that there is
a practice Wednesday afternoon,
Thursday morning, and a scrum
practice every morning this week.
Esson Young, who Is coaching the
team is in high hopes of handing
the Victoria Ruggers as big a beating aa Victoria suffered last year.
Swimming Club
Notice
AU members of the Swimming Club are requested to be
present at the Artona Studio tonight (Tuesday), at 7 o'clock.
Swim togs are in order for the
picture.
H.M.S. PINAFORE
The special mount we
have had made for you
with the U.B.C. shield in
blue on the cover is proving very popular.
Have YOUR pictures finished in this exclusive
Varsity style.
833 GRANVILLE ST.
SEY. 5737
SWIMMERS GET      Qt»tkm  «n»»
A NEW MENTOR dCMOf      D
Cagers Win
Varsity's erstwhile swimming club
Is preparing to open the spring season,
following a lapse during the fall term
when activities were at a standstill
With the appointment of Norman Cox
as coach, tha natators have commenced practicing regularly at Chalmers' tank, as well as at Crystal Pool.
The hours allotted to tha students at
Chalmers are Mondays and Thursdays from «to 10 p.m., while Crystal
Pool is available on Tuesday* from
3 to 6.
Among tht meats that art planned
for tha spring term is • dual contact
with the Wast Vancouver club, which
should prove a big attraction for the
collegian swimmers. Any who are
Interested tra asked to be out on
Thursday.
DICK FARRlNOTON
A star end on the Varsity Big Four
Canadian Rugby squad, Dick Far-
rington is now devoting his time to
toachino the Senior City team which
is rapidly rounding into shape for
the spring schedule. .Faced with the
necessity of filling seven vactnr'es
on the Varsity aggregation, the ttig
Four men and the .coaching .staff
are watching with interest the progress made .by. the second string
gridders.
Practices are now beinp held on
nearly every afternoon during the
week and any students who are interested are invited to turn out.
BIG BLOCK CLUB
Members of the Big Block Club
are requested to meet on Wednesday
night at 6 p.m. in the Artona Studios to have a group photograph
taken. Block sweaters are to be
worn.
Why did she throw herself at him
that way? Because she knew he was
n good catch.
Your Nearest Bank is
The   Canadian
Bank of
Commerce
Tenth and Sasamat Branch
A general banking business is transacted, and accounts of the Faculty and
Students of The University of British Columbia
are welcomed.
BANKERS TO THE
ALMA MATER
SOCIETY
C. R. Myers, Manager
Frank L. Ansoombe
TAILQR
Dry  Cleaning  -  Pressing
Remodeling  •  Repairs
446S W. 10th Ave. P. G.
Call and Deliver
Vanity defeated C.N.R. 29-
28 in a thrilling Senior "B"
game at V.A.C. gym Saturday
night.
By virtue of thip close victory Vanity eased into third
place in the league itandingi
and considerably enhanced
their chances of getting into tht
playoffs. The teams went on
tha floor with practically the same
standing and as a win was absolutely necessary they both hit a fast
pace. Varsity wu decldely on the
catching and in this half. The boys
couldn't seem to cljck together and
but for soma nice shots by Jimmy
Bardsley, the fighting Science man,
they would have gone down considerably more. Bill Lucas and Murray
McDonald were generally steady on
defense but Nicholson of C.N.R.
broke through for some nice baskets. Half time found Varsity down
17-14.
The second half was productive of
even more ragged play but Varsity's
forwards found tha basket often
enough to give them a fair lead.
Jimmy Bardsley was hitting a Senior
"A" pace on a Senior "B" team and
drew a big hand from the crowd
that packed the V. A. C. gym.
With but three minutes to go Varsity led by 19-24. Two long shots
by C. N. R. ln the next two minutes
brought the crowd to their feet, the
score now standing 19-28. With one
minute left to play, three Varsity
forwards broke for the opposing basket. Biff McLeod took a pass and
missed a perfect "set-up," Wilf
Stokvis caught the ball as it passed
the basket and missed again while
Bill Lucas missed a third just for
good measure. The whistle blew
just as C.N.R. took possession and
Varsity raised enough energy to let
out a feeble whoop as they straggled
from the floor,  winners by  29-28.
The team: Murray McDonald (2),
Jimmy Bardsley (12), Bill Lucas (6),
Bobby McDonald (4), Biff McLeod
(2),  Wilf Stokvis   (3).
/*% Hat One of Chris'
r ~y Law _ creations that
"^ ^f* wiU tickle, fi-
t\_J e±J \+ ckle appetities
and satisfy
the instinct for economy  .  ,  .
Single Decker Club Sandwich,
with Coffee 35c
Breast of Chicken, rasher of
bacon, with sliced tomatoes
and lettuce. Drop in and indulge in this delightfully tasty creation next time you're
downtown.
722 Granville Street
Badminton
Rackets at Real
Value in this
January
Badminton Sale
at
A. G. Spalding
& Bros.
424 Hastings W.
Trin. 5401 Trin. 5402
Drop in and see these
Clearance Values
University Book Store
Hours: 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.; Saturdays, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.
Loose-Leaf Note Books, Exercise Books and Scribblers
at "Reduced Prices
Graphic and Engineering Paper, Biology Paper.
Loose-Leaf Refills, Fountain Pens and Ink.
Pencil and Drawing Instruments.
Crepe Paper for Masquerades, etc.
ALL YOUR BOOK SUPPLIES SOLD HERE

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