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The Ubyssey Sep 29, 1931

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Issued Twice Weekly by the Students' Publications Board of The University of British Columbia
NO. 3
Further Supply
Of Text Books
Needed at Once
Business at the Book Exchange 1.
still booming. Not only are the sale,
very large but there is a steady
demand for book, not on hand. All
those having book, to Mil are urged
to communicate with the exchange
immediately, in order that purchasers
may not be kept waiting. Book,
ordered at the Exchange must bo
called for by 5 p.m., Wednesday ties
30th. Any remaining after that date
will be Mid upon demand.
The following book, are In demand
at tho book exchange: Jordan, Gon-
eral Bacteriology; Castl., Genetic
and Eugenic; Sinnott and Dunn,
Principle, of Genetics; Hopkins,
General Chemistry tor Colleges;
Noyes, Qualitative Analysis; Gatter-
man, Practical Methods of Organic
Chemtetry; Noyo. and Sherrill
Chemical Principle.; Cohen, Organic
ChemUrtry; Lewis ft Bandall, Principle, of Thermodynamics; Virgil's
Aeneld, Book 6; Cicero, De Amlcitias
Cicero, Pro Archia; Horace, Ode II.
Duff, Writers of Borne; Wnltebeck
it Finch, Economic Geography;
Knight, Barnes a Flugel, Economic
History af Europe; Holeteworth,
Money and Banking; Edie, Money,
Bank Credit, and Price.; Griffon,
Principle, of Foreign Trade; Taussig,
Principle, of International Trade;
Anderson, Lindeman, Urban Sociology; Cubberly, History of Education; Gate., Psychology for Student,
of Education; Sears, Class Boom
Organization and Control; Kandel,
History of Secondary Education;
Judd, Psychology of Secondary Education.
The following text, for English 2
supplementary reading: Henry IV.,
Part 1; Stories from Hakluyt; Bacon's
Essay.; Pageant of Elizabethan
Poetry; Hamlet; Gulliver. Travels;
Pilgrim. Progress; Pope, Bape of the
Lock; Byron, Prisoner of Chlllon;
Scott, Heart of Midlothian and the
Antiquary; Stlf-Cultivatlon In English; Borneo and Juliet; Tho Fact.
Thorndike; Cambridge and Oxford,
Shakespeare; Campbell, Sophocles in
English Verse; Everyman and other
Interlude; Chief Elizabethan Dramatic.
The Poetical Works of the following: Dryderi, Pope, Swift, Addison,
Steele, Johnson, Goldsmith, Burke,
Burns, Wordsworth, Coleridge, Byron,
Keats, Shelley, Scott, Browning,
Arnold, Tennyson. Pierce, Century
Beading in Nineteenth Century Poeta;
Brown, Essays of Our Times; Sanders
A Neilson, Chief Modern Poets;
Higby, History of Europe; Schaplro,
Modern and Contemporary European
History; Lucas and Edgerton, Historical Geography of Canada, Parte
I. and II; Trevelyan, History of England; England Under the Stuarts:
Robinson, Development of the British
Smith,, Age of the Beformatlon;
Froude, Life and Letters of Erasmus;
Wakeman, The Ascendancy of France;
Lowell, The Eye of the French
Bevolution; Bose, The Bevolutlonary
and Napoleonic Era; Gottschalk, The
Ira of the French Bevolution; Hazcn,
Europe Since 1315; Grant Boberteon,
England Under the Hanoverian.; Fay,
Great Britain from Adam Smith to
the Present Day; Trevelyan, British
History of the Nineteenth Century.
Patrick, Introduction to Philosophy;
MacDougall, Social Psychology and
the Group Mind.
Cecelia  Long  occupies the  Mere
tary's chair at Council meetings. In
her freshman year she worked on the
"Ubyssey" as a reporter. As a sopho
more she was assistant editor of the
Totem.   She  blossomed   out  in   her
third year, however, holding the vice
presidency of Arts: '32, a position on
the Stadium Committee, and wa. also
a member of the Players' Club.
Pyjama-clad Frosh Plastered
And Painted by Sophomore
In Athletic Park Hazing Orgy
Snake Parade Formed During Intermission of Game; Freshman
Pyre Burned to Ground  on Friday Night;  Frosh Take
Revenge on Saturday Night; Sophs Receive Ducking
In  the  Lily  Pond.
Phyllis Freeman
Receives Award
Phyllis Freeman, graduate of the
University of B C. has been awarded
a fellowship valued at $1000 by the
Library Congress for independent research work at Washington, D.C. She
will work under the chief of the
manuscript deportment on the subject
of the connection between American
and Canadian trade unions.
Miss Freeman graduated from
U. B. C. in 1929 with honors in history. She consistently gained brilliant
marks for her vork here. She took
her M.A. at an eastern university and
will prceed to her Ph.D. on this now
fellowship. Miss Freeman was also
interested in extra-curricular work at
U.B.C, having been a senior editor
on the Ubyssey staff and a member
of the Historical Society and the Letters Club.
Dr. Kiang Speaki
On Oriental Life
To S.C.M. Members
"Modern philosophy imported from
the outside world is the underlying
cause of trouble in the Orient," emphasized Dr. Kiang Kang-Hu, in an
address given under tne auspices of
the Students' Christian Movement on
Sunday evening in St. Andrew'i
church parlor.
Dr. Kiang i> Professor and Head of
the Department ef Oriental Lan~
MeCUU Uni-
varsity. He arrived In Vancouver on
the Impress of Japan on Sunday afternoon and left the city at 10 p.m.
the same night
Although hi. visit In the Orient
lasted only a month, he return, to
Canada with a wealth of first-hand
facts concerning Chinese and Japanese problems. "The youth of China
practically worship the western
world and its theories of life," ho
stated. "Modern scientific thought
with its idea of evolution and 'strug
gle tor existence' has Impressed China
and Japan and is It any wonder then
that they both 'struggle' for Manchuria and a better chance to 'exist'?"
"Japan, to be polite, admit, that
Manchuria belong, to China, but in
reality the former has absolute control in that country. Her armies are
stationed within the Manchurian cities."
The other Oriental problem, that
Dr. Kiang dimmed beside the Chinese revolution were the advent of
CommunUm in China and the recent
flood catastrophes. System, of Soviet
government have already been nt up
In at least two different sections of
China, he Mated.
'The river flood, which have
drowned countless thousands, have
left millions destitute and will directly affect 100,000,000 Chinese."
Dr. Kiang also visited the former
boy emperor who 1. now about twenty-seven year, of age. "He told me
that he would like to visit America
and Europe, but because he was once
i< king and emperor the trip would
even now be dangerous."
<  ».
Tuesday,   September   29
Freshette  Gym.  Club  Tea,
1190 Wolfe Avenue.
Thoth, Arts 201.
Men's Athletic 12:15, Ap. Sc.
Wednesday, September 30
Biol. Discussion, Noon,
Ap. Sc. 101.
Thursday, October 1
Men's Gym. Club Arts 108, 12:10
Tennis Club Meeting,
Arts 104,12:10
The students in general, ond the
sophomores in particular, were
thrown into an uproar when a Sun
reporter descended on thri campus
Monday, camera In arm, for the -jx-
press purpose of photographing the
Freshman cW-ss en masse in the Lily
Pond. Alwa>s obliging, president
Doug Brown had the campus scoured
for willing Sophs, but at the time
of going to press, thc delegation
consists of D Brown, Doug Brown,
D. M. Brown and Aqua. Perhaps the
Sophs are slightly leery of the casual manner in which the scribe "advertised" for One Dozen Frosh, 'o
be thrown in the Lily Pond at onco.
Must be accustomed to publicity.
Apply, stating sahu'y expected, to
Doug Brown." Try and find tho
upper classmen who can't remember the fearless manner In which
Pilkington, gown and all, braved the
dangers of a Lily Pond Fiasco
armed only with his vest-pocket l-'u-
dak? And to think of a Frosh being induced to swim only after n
promise of three columns in the Sun
Society page.
The Players' Club announces the
election of Dr. F. C. Walker, Associate Professor of English to the position of Honorary President. 'He ha.
served on the advteory board of the
club for many yean, and therefore
will bo a valuable asset to the society.
Clad in their bed-time garments, two hundred Freshmen endured iong hours of torment at the hands of the relentless Sophomores for the sake of becoming full-fledged members of the
Alma Mater Society. The pyjama-clad Freshmen were herded
into the V. A. C. gym. at 6 p.m. on Friday and one by one they
were conducted to the long line of waiting Second Year men.
Blindfolded and with their hand«$
tied,  they suffered practically   the
same punishment   their   tormentors
had experienced last year.    Mercuro-
chrome, lamp black, grease, kalso-
mine and plaster-of-parls were generously   applied   by   eager   Sophs.
Hair-cllpplng, however, had   been
barred and the First Year men completed their hazardous trip without
receiving the usual semi-permanent
mark of distinction on their scalps.
Blue and black effect, were applied
not only with the paint-brush but
alto with bludgeon, the rise of baseball bate manufactured and wielded
by an ardent group of Sophomore.
disguised under the officious name of
"Committee No. 3."
During the rugby   game   between
Varsity and New Westminster,   the
black-faced  hordes  exhibited    their
lung-power to Upper cleat students
when  they roared  the  "Kitsilano"
again and again.   At half-time they
swarmed over the field beneath the
spotlights and tried their best to form
a make-parade.
After an athletic attraction,   there
followed an exodus to the Varsity
campus and the site of the bonfire
B. C. Electric but., transported the
pyjama-wearers. The pyre, the second one to be prepared by the Frosh,
consisting of telephone  poles   ond
rubbish from th. stadium became a
roaring furnace. Untouchable Freshmen, who had mingled   with   the
throng, cheered lustily when the So
phomore of straw and sacks fell into
the tnkbK « the taing^
Their spirits warmed by tha Are,
and with no snake-parade to con-
sumo   their restrained   energy,   the
From Instituted an extensive March
tor the elusive Sophomore..     They
questioned occupant, of car. a. they
left the scene of the blaze and even
accosted the aloof upper class men.
Those Sophomores that were caught
were submerged in the lily pond.
First Pile Burnt
"Gad!"    muttered    a    disillusioned
Frosh at approximately 2 a.m. Saturday   morning,   "Wish  those  lousy
Sophs would put in an appearance,
it only for the sake of warming us
up. I'm tired of lying on the ground
freezing to death."     Little did the
hapless "wearer of the green" realize the irony of hi. word., for in
le. than two hour, their impressive
pyre wa. a nothing mass of smoke
and flame..
The small band of Soph, met ta
tlie Arte Common Boom et eight-
thirty and preceded to the scene of
battle In a truck. After a slight argument with th* ever watchful Sitting Bull, they advanced upon the
From.   On rounding the corner, the
truck wa. met by a   small   band,
aupposedly   green-horn*.     After   a
short  but  heated  battle the  Sophs
discovered   to  their   great   ;maze-
ment that their opponents wore also
of  the  same  class.  The gang  then
repaired  to  the  bus  station   where
they preceded to form a snake parade.   Crowing   the new   field, they
were   met   by   the   Freshmen   who
outnumbered them six to.one. After
the rather one-sided battle that followed the Sophs retreated in a more
(Please turn to Page Two)
Honors Course
Is Established
In Commerce
"The enrollment in commerce has
ben far heavier than ever anticipated, with the result that an honors
course has been established to give
a segregation of student, of higher
calibre within the department," stated
Prof. J. Friend Day in an inter vie .v
granted to the pros, on Monday.
"We are trying to carry out the
same principles in this course, aj
have been already established In tho
pass course, namely, a training of
student, which will prove of definite value in business life," he continued, with the remit that Statistic*
"2" has been made a compulsory
subject. "This course includes a
study of business forecasting, the
value of which is apparent to everybody. Oiving the student an opportunity for independent investigation
of a section of one ot our basic in
dustries, we have exemptei honor
students of three unite of lect'H-e,
work." In Prof. Day', opinion these
students will not only have contacts with governmental departments, but with present day buslne.-s
leaders also. They will also obtain
a practical knowledge ot collecting
and compiling business data in «ucn
a form that, being available in the
Library in the form of theses, will
form an integral part of a financial
and statistical history of ot:r basic
provincial industries.
Thus the policy of the University
as originally laid down in this d«-
partment, is being maintained, in
that the graduates will have a definite knowledge of theory and practice
of modern business, and a specific
appreciation of the industrial factors
with which the province is concerned," he concluded.
-, *	
A meeting of Ex-Kitsilano students
interested in Rugby, Grass Hockey,
and Track will be held in Kitsilano
High School on Thursday, October
1 at 7:30 p.m.
"■-*-* **ifeL'a.,S«HMMMBJsS««* VVi"'-;
Starting on Thursday, October 8,
the Library will Inaugurate for the
present session its weekly exhibition
of new books. In connection therewith Miss Jefferd has undertaken to
prepare for the "Ubyssey" a list of
new accessions. Those interested will
find this list appearing In the Tuesday issue of the "Ubyssey."
«   •   •
year the Teaching Staff has
on "Reserve" a much larger
list of books for student reference.
The various History courses, for
Instance, require about one thousand
volume* for "Required" reading. The
card, representing these book, require almost one full drawer In the
"Reserve" Catalogue.
This heavy Increase In the requirement* for "Reserve" reading has
necottiteted tho enlargement of the
Rserve" Catalogue. It ha. been increased by six additional drawer.,
and will now bo ample to accommodate  all   the  book,  earmarked   by
Faculty for this purpose.
• • •
The attention of first year students
i. directed to the regulation that first
and ncond year student, are supposed to do their reading In the main
reading room. The south reading
room Is nt aside for third' year students, and thc north reading room
for fourth year student, and graduates.
If the main reading room is so
crowded that there is no accommodation, first ond second .year student,
may take seats In either of the other
rooms, but are supposed to go back
to their own room as soon a. there
are vacant chairs.
All students are reminded that
seats in the reading rooms cannot be
pre-empted by leaving book, and
other material on the table. Some
student, have made a practtee of
going away for an hour to attend
lecture., leaving their note books,
etc., to reserve their nate In the
reading room.
A. th. accommodation in the three
reading rooms i. not nearly sufficient
for the student enrolment, it 1. not
fair to other, to attempt to hold nate
in thi. way. Any student, therefore,
ha. th. right, on thon occasion,
when the reading room, are crowded,
to gather up the study material at an
unoccupied place at a reading table.
The only way to renrve accommodation -1. to be in actual occupation.
Mark was a freshman with the
clan of '33 during which year he
was Athletic representative for his
class and also played on the intermediate Canadian Rugby team. His
time during his sophomore year was
occupied with the business managership of the Players' Club. He is now
official money Tender for the Alma
Mater Society.
Mr. A. B. Loore, former Varsity
student, who har been a resident of
Vancouver for over twenty year., has
recently assumed the management of
the Bank of Montreal, 10th and
Trimble   Street   branch.   Mr.   Loore
served overna. with the University
Battalion, and has nveral time, been
president of the Western University
Battalion. Association. Mr. Loore la
making his home in the district, and
will take an active Interest in affairs
pertaining to the University.
by Tavender
A special meeting for all Freshettes will be held in Arts 100 on
Wednesday noon.
HKttflo! THfYARertfiW
IF "rofrTWo* MY K'uS
I'D Give en a oang
MWRt Tteffs'fteCRowa
The crowd of be-rlbboned Freshette. who met In the gymnasium on
Friday evening attended the most
successful Initiation In recent years.
The precedent established last year
v/as continued in an impressive candle-lighting ceremony.
The contort which opened the program, helped to create a friendly at-
inospnere and did away with any
need for Introduction* Your name
anl address, plean," was heard on
nil ride. a. tach Fremette tried to
collect a. many of them as poniblo
in the given mace of time.
Senior, and Freshettes alike united
in downing the Informal "bean-feed,"
made feftive for the occasion by the
addition of pie and coffee. One
feature of interest was the introduction of the new song, "Hail, U. B.
C," which promises to become a university favorite.
"This Initiation is to bridge the gap
between your high school and university days," mid Dorothy Myers, in
her short speech previous to the candle-lighting ceremony. Thi. part of
the initiation wa. made even more
impressive thi. year than last. Around
the double circle of Fremette. filed
the Senior., who lighted their "two
small candle, from the large one held
by the president of the W. U. S. Af
tor each upper-clan girl had taken
her poaitlon, the first year girl, repeated their pledge.
At the clfln the Freahette. were
handed thc lighted candle, as a symbol of the lasting friendship between
member, of the Alma Mater Society.
U.B.C. Graduate
Relates Stories
Of Oxford Life
Recounts Tales of History of
English University and Speculates on Teaching Methods
Players Give
Trial Parts
To Newcomers
The Players' club will settle down
nriously to their year's work when
they will distribute try-out parts to
prospective member, on Thursday
noon in Arts 103. Those who will
apply for membership on technical
ability will write letters of application to the wretary, Betty Wilson.
Applications for admittance on acting ability sre to be in the box in
the men's end of the Arts building
to be  provided for the purpose  by
In a letter recently arrived
from England Mr. Mathews received
word from a former student of tl.i»
University, Geoffrey B. Ridde-
hough, who is engaged in some Interesting literary renarch In connection with hi. Ph. D. at Oxford
Univereity. The letter contain, much
information of interest to students,
especially those who intend to pursue a post-graduate courn in English.
"Mr. Riddehouh'. account of his
experiences is admirably written,
and with the kind perminton of Vr.
Mathews the letter will be given aa
it is with one or two omimon..
I have been spending another summer in England looking up old manuscripts, hunting for unpubli.hM
texts and checking over many that
have been printed. Trying to find
undinovered material often invotvo*
false scents, for a printed catalogue
doesn't alway. give an accurate idea
of the manuscript, themnlvea. t'vo
worked over most of the manuscript,
that seem helpful so far a. the British Munum i. concerned, and I've
had two voyage, of dtecovj.-y in rbe
Bodleian at Oxford.
' "I,wa« at Oxford again last wsek.
As wa. the can last time I visited
that place, there wa. heavy rain
nearly every hour I was there—
which was good for work, at any
rate. Mo« of the time I was working in the fiftenth-century room in
the Bodleian which still bears the
name of the good Duke Humphrey
who did so much for the Ubrary; ft
" was a beautiful old ceiling cov-
emblazoned panels bear-
• shelve. In front of th* ancient
desk at which I was writing wer.
filled with old heavy book, bound
In faded calf—long-forgotten treatises on medicine and law and theology
of which most of the author, are
just forgotten names now. It's rath-
ev curious to pick up a manunript
of the fifteenth century and to reflect that when the monk or minstrel wrote then verses in that
queer round handwriting, Columbus hadn't sailed for the New
World, and that no white man was
within six thousand mile, of where
the prennt student graduated.
I dare say that Oxford exercise, n
very great charm on the men who
have been part of it for two or
three years.
.Oxford strikes me-M far a. tho
academic part of It is concerned -
as exceedingly Introspective and nlf-
regarding. It i. conscious of tradition to be perpetuated, whereas
our Universities an still dealing:
with the raw, crude materials out
of which a succeeding generation
perceive, tradition to have beet
formed. I couldn't help thinking of
Browning*, line, to the effect that
the Artificer', hand 1. no way arrested with us, etc. For instance,
Oxford very largely choon. It', professors and it's tutor, from Oxford
men; not only are they from the
same university, but even from the
same college where they were undergraduate*. A trans-atlantlc university, whose teaching staff may
have taken their degree, anywhere
from Leipzig to California, i. naturally a far len uniform product; and
yet that same diversity is a vital
thing compared with Oxford statuesque tranquillity.
The ancient religious element ;a
very clearly expressed in those Oxford coleges, with their spires and
their chapels and their sweet bells.
I've often thought how significant
it   is   that   a    college    like    Corpvs
Wednesday noon. _.  . A.       ,, ,        -
"The Players'  Club  is one of the n^"^0"!! keeP lts.Prf-Re^™«
few   organizations   en   the   campus
which is self .supporting, and is start
ing its annual drive to overcome the
self-consciousness of students who
have not as ypt appeared on a stage.
A little self-confidence may bring
great rewards,' states president Alice
"The experience and stage presence
which the Club gives its members
the opportunity to obtain under expert supervision is an invaluable asset
in the opinion of Bill Cameron,
prominent in last year's spring play
and a member of this year's executive.
In a few days the Alma Mater
Society will circulate slips
which when signed by the individual students will enable
thc A. M. S. to collect the caution money which was voted
last February toward thc Stadium fund but which was held
up due to legal technicalities.
tion name through centuries of Protestantism; the name still witnesses
to a medieval theology. The motto,
"Domlnus illuminatis mea," Oxford'^
own, reminds one of those distant
days when the patient monk finished laborious transcribing of a
book with a pious line of thanks to
the Holy Trinity. I have seen much
worse mottoes
I   sincerely   hope   that   things   in
Canada will brighten up.   The little
news I got over here is discouraging.
Yours  sincerely,
Scholarship students are advised
that their can.'s are now ready at the
Registrar's offlce, and are requested
to call for them as soon as possible.
This is very important as delay may
cause inconvenience to other scholarship holders.
This year over $11,000 is being paid
out in scholarships. One half of the
payment v/i'l be made on October
Application Blanks for the Rhodes
Scholarship may now be obtained at
the Registrar's office. Students who
won scholarships are advised to refer
to section 6, page 68, in the Calendar. ^
r^*w;r ^^'^f^^p^ ^r^^c ~«^
Page Two
Tuesday, September 29, 1931
<Ihr HbyHHry
(Member of Pacific Inter-Collegiate Press Association)
Issued every Tuesday and Friday by the Student
Publication Board of the University of British Columbia,
West Point Grey.
Phone Point Grey 691
Mall Subscription rate: $3 per year
Advertising rates on application.
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF-Himie Koshevoy
Editorial Staff
Senior Editors
Tues. Issue, Mairi Dingwall; Fri. Issue, Doris Barton
Sport Editor, J. Wilfred Lee; Feature Editor, E. J. Costain
Associate Editors: Frances Lucas, Mollie Jordan,
Art McKenzie, Rosemary Winslow, Cecil Brennan
Literary Editor, Frances Lucas
Exchange Editor, Nathan Nemetz
Columnist, R. Grantham
Assistant Editors, Tom Howe, Norman Hacking; others
yet to be appointed
News Manager, St. John Madeley
Reportorial Staff: Several assorted reporters; others yet
to be appointed
Business Manager, Reg. Price
It was down at the printer's the night of the
first issue and several of the "Ubyssey" staff
gathered in one corner, waiting for the makeup to be finished, were talking over the, position 6i student journalism at the University of
British Columbia.
"Well," said one, "it looks like a hard year
for the staff, what with the paper bigger and
"Students don't realize how much time has
to be given to it," opined another,-and went
on to mutter something about the "Ubyssey"
not having enough prestige on the campus.
And this is sadly too true. Even Student's
Council, though they believe they work hard,
do not give as much time to administrative affairs. The fact that there is no great rush to
join the staff shows that the "Ubyssey" is not
generally considered the major activity that it
really is. The leading athletic teams have more
prestige in so far as competition for positions
may be taken as an indication. There should
be a larger number of aspiring scribes in order
to give scope for selection. At present this is
not the case to a satisfactory extent.
Moat papers south of the line and even some
north of the line either pay members of the
staff for part of the time given to the work or
give credits which are counted towards degrees. The time is nesting when some such innovation will have to be adopted at U. B. C.
At the present time editors of this paper must
sacrifice academic work to a large extent, and
are even begrudged reimbursement for necessary expenses incurred.
Perchance were these conditions on the "Ubyssey" alleviated, the students would flock in
larger droves to the journalistic sanctum or
-   -       Professor Wood
In Professor F. G. C. Wood, the University
has had one of its most loyal and enthusiastic
workers. For fifteen years, Professor Wood has
given his able support and most of his leisure
time to the promotion of the Players' Club as
an active and important organization on the
Campus. That his efforts have been successful is an accepted fact now, but they have cost
Professor Wood at least the temporary loss of
his health, and necessitated his withdrawal
from active participation in student affairs
—a loss which will be seriously felt.
His interest has not been confined only to
the lecture room and the Players' Club, There
are many students who speak gratefully of the
individual attention they have received in their
difficulties. They feel no doubts as to how their
applications for advice will be received, which
probably accounts not only for his popularity
but also the fact that he has had no time to call
his own
However, if true friendliness and respect are
any recompense to him for this material loss,
the last fifteen years have not been wasted in
any way. No one who has even a speaking acquaintance with Professor Wood, and particularly those who have enjoyed a course of
study under his leadership, has anything but
the warmest regard for him, and appreciation
of the self-sacrifice he has practised in the interests of the University.
It appears that our editorial column has gone
off the deep end and has unwittingly hurt the
feelings of several people. In writing the editorial on "Commercializing Initiation" we maligned Mr. Bob Brown without fully knowing
the facts concerning the initiation ceremonies.
Mr. Brown had no hand in the matter of arranging the hazing and almost refused to have
it since it was entirely arranged by the Stu-
dens' Council. So we beg pardon of Mr. Brown
and lay the entire burden of blame on worthy
Council for the publicity end of the plans.
Again we repeat we are against, the commercializing of initiation and hold forth the suggestion that it be placed on the campus with
enough items of interest thereon to keep the
Frosh from dashing downtown in an unorganized parade.
An evidence that considerable doubt exists
as to the value of fraternities comes in the
form of a questionnaire from a committee appointed by the Alma Mater Society to investigate the situation.
The To me the questionnaire is
Questionnaire     not very satisfactory. Some of
the questions are superfluous, others too general or not sufficiently explicit.
I suggest that the committee ask the Editor
to publish in the next issue of The Ubyssey
A ■■!! —II m II 111 Mil Mi II M I
and Pen
in a lecture the other day the professor, to
illustrate an Indian boy's process of education, read to us extracts from "Hiawatha," by
one Longfellow.
And through my mind, the while,
Hiawatta were running fragments of a more
modern classic—"Hiawatta" by Milt
Gross, author of "Nize Baby" ("the great comedy of American life. An epic of the great indoors, told in four floors and an entirely new
language. Read it for its humor, its insight behind the laughter, its frantic illustrations by
the author.") Publishers of both works, George
H. Doran Co., New York.
Mr. Gross, in a stylev that is peculiarly
"Gross," has adapted the language to his use in
strange fashion, ^but he is, on the whole, more
intelligible than is James Joyce in "Anna Livia
I recommend this virile American writer to
the attention of the Letters Club. Let this be
one case in which it is not left to posterity to
bestow proper recognition upon talent.
Here is a passage telling of the youth and education of the boy Hiawatta:
"Gave de Chiff a hexclamation
"Hock yel Hock ye—nubble worriers
In de willage, in de weegwom
Wheech it .tends a rule no cheeldren
Brutt lest wick de .tuck a Baby
From de name from Hiawatta
Wott'U be I hesk a henswer!"
Opp it jomped de skwuw Nokomis
Spicking witt a wolce excited
"I would like to make a motion
What I should adapt de baby,"
Gave de Chlff a hexclamation
"Ho K, is by me agribble."
So it grew opp Hiawatta
Went itch day to keendergotten
Loined from all de holds a lengwidge
From de holds wltt bists a lengwidge
All de crltchures from de forest
He should be on spiciklng tolms witt
Gave a hoot de Howl "Goot Monnink"
Honked a honk de goon "Hello Keed"
Gave a scrltch de higgle "Yoo Hoo"
Quecked a queck de dock "How guzzlt?"
Gave a bozz de bizz "Hozz beeznen?"
By de squoilles he made lnqulrrlz
How'U gonna be de weenter
Gave de squoilles a henswer proutly.
"Hall de signs witt hlndlcations
Pointing to a beezy slzzon,
Reach wltt prosperous a hera,
Witt a houtlook hoptlmeestlc.
In de trlzz we got dispossits
Wot It feegures opp a tuttle
Feefty-savan tousand hacorns
Ulso from nex tousand wallnota
Stends a Kepltal witt Solplora."
In de durr In sommer Ivlngs        '
Set de leodle Hiawatta
Watched it geeve de .trim a reeple
From de reeple saw de moon rlze
In de sky It rose de moon opp
Opstess like a helewator.
Denced oppon de moon a shedow
So de grendma gave a henswer,"
Then follas de hinterustink legent off how de
moon it got its shedows.
De book it it enlivened by a many pen-ink
shetches soch as leedle Hiawatta stending witt
his elbows rusting on a hive of frondly bizz.
* #   #
While watching the Canadian rugby contest
at Athletic Park on Saturday night, recollections of the days when I played that noble
game came upon me. I have forgotten some of
the rules and terminology, but
Rugby two   important    principles   I
Recollections   never shall forget.
I was reminded of the first
when the stands cheered a Varsity player as
he made a wild assault upon an opponent,
bringing him down clumsily and with diffir
culty. Without presuming to be a sport critic,
I think I may fairly say that both teams have
more,to learn about tackling. A man should
be tackled neither at his neck, nor his waist,
nor even his knees, but at his ankles.
Time after time I saw line plungers trying to break through while running almost
erect. Naturally, they didn't have much success, but they would have had more luck if
they had followed the Canadian rugby custom
of bending over and charging head-on.
* *   *
The Handbook this year contains a new departure—a lengthly sermon on "Fraternities,"
in which I was not surprised to find the word
"college" used for "university." There is some
advice, a hint of warning, and the
Handbook comforting assurance that failure
Humbug to be bid "is by no means a slam."
And then, this: "Whatever you do,
do not turn anti-. That leads only to discontentment."
May I point out that most thinking leads to
discontentment, and that students are supposed
to think? That last piece of advice is like a shot
of mental dope.
It is not my intention to open an argument
on fraternities here, but let me say that I have
known many fine alumni of various universities who were opposed to fraternities, that I
have known plenty of students on this campus,
many of them leaders, who opposed fraternities, and that I have even heard of bids being
turned down. Many prominent educators hold
no brief for fraternities.
So if you come to the conclusion that a university would be better off without fraternities,
don't let the Handbook's humbug deter you
from "turning anti-." You'll be in good company.
the preliminary reports that were read to the
Alma Mater Society last spring. One report
made out a case for fraternities, and the other
made out a case against them. I further suggest that those who receive questionnaires refrain from returning them until Friday, on the
chance that these reports will then be available
for consideration.
I»—n     <■     in      ii      ii      ii      w      i   iSi
Correspondence   I
a———mi Hi  ii||  i Mil I i   lliiiiw..ili»ill.aiM||itwS.«^»M^esy
Editor "Ubyssey"; Sir:-
In your pdltorlal of the twenty-
fifth instant, headed "Commercializing Initiation,' you have made a very
unnecessary nvtack upon Mr. Bob
Brown and upon the efforts of the
Canadian Hugoy Club.
As a regular league game, the profits of the game will go to the league
and not to Mr. Brown. At the end
of the season the Alma Mater Society
will benefit as usual to the extent of
its share of these profits. For tho
game the tickets had been reduced
in price to twenty-five cents, the
regular price being twice that
amount. In former years the freshmen were forced to pay at least fifty
or sixty cent:) for admission to a
downtown theatre, no part of which
money returned to the University.
Your remarks would lead people to
believe that the Initiation was the
major attraction. Actually It was only
Incidental to the game.
Inasmuch as Mr. Brown generously
donated to fie University the Athletic Park Gym and Dressing rooms
for the occasion, we feel that no less
than a public apology to him will
suffice.   Your   statements   made,   it
seems, without full knowledge of the
situation, were entirely uniustiflcd.
Yours truly,
F. J. MACLEAN (President)
W. R. MACDONALD (Bus. Mgr.)
Editor "Ubyssey," Dear Sir:
What is the matter with the class
of 35? At Athletic Park on Saturday
night they took their initiation in fine
spirit. But at the bonfire which followed, they showed a complete reversal of, form.
I overheard several sophs as they
left thc park. "That was a good, initla-
- ild, "No halr-cl-'~    —
.._.—-,     --   io trguments.
tnrough fine.
tlon," one said, "No halr-cltoping, no
fights, and no trguments. They went
We watched them dlaperse. A few
radical, ran *o town, bursting in on
the Orpheum Theatre as a tender
scene waa being enacted, on the
screen. The crowd applauded. Thoy
aeem to like the light of a few
freshles out for a bit of harmlew fun.
They laughed when those nme
freshles were chased acron the stage
by a couple of highly indignant cop*.
Wc watched them leave to rejoin the
larger part of the clan at the bonfire.
"I wonder," one of our party ventured, "If there would be safety In a
few harmless sophs attending that
bonfire." "Certainly," another replied.
"Therein lies the success of every
initiation. Once we initiate the Frosh,
we are supposed to welcome them a.
equal students of Varsity. Let', go out
and congratulate them."
Thu. It was that a party of half a
dozen soph, made their way to the
now-historic none. The first right that
met our eye. wa. that of a dripping,
disheveled, sophomore. We knew him
well, He had the reputation of having
the worst haircut on the campus the
year before. He had one initiation—
but in coming to the frosh bonfire he
had received another. A group ot
three surrounded him. In the midst
of a discussion on sportsmanship, we
were interrupted by a cry of "Sophs!
and a band of Frosh swooped down
on us like a tribe of Arab.. The boys
I had been talking to a minute before
were In a moment half way to the
Lily Pond. A few minute, later they
were swimming with the avidity of a
Welssmuller. In the meantime, I had
found mynlf quite prone with a full
pint of Henderson's paint ("Save the
surface and you nve all"—advt.) In
my mouth. "C'mon, let', chuck di.
guy In de drink," wa. the substance
of the next remark, a. I remember
It. "Aw, what-the-what," one kind-
hearted Frosh remarked, "Palnt-ln-
the-mouth equal. One good swim." A
mathematician, undoubtedly. We'll
not bore you with the details of the
next eight attempts on our lives.
And so we ask—was that sportsmanship? I can hear many readers snickering and saying, "Serves 'em right."
But bear in mind, dear reader, that
those sophs who "took the rap" on
Saturday night were the freshmen of
a year ago who took their hair-clipping and their painting without a
murmur. One of our number had a
pair of clippers in his hip pocket all
night. Not one lock of hair was lost in
the entire proceedings.
For the time being, the sophs have
decided to excuse the frosh, as it Is
quite probable that they failed t» get
clearly the meaning of an initiation.
But for the future—Why not wise up,
Third year students are reminded
that Thursday is the last day on
which they may apply for membership in the Historical Society. Five
vacancies have been left for third
year students interested in the discussion of Historical topics. Members
are required to write a paper during
their Senior year. Applications may
be addressed to Miss Isabel Bescoby
or Miss Mary Wallace.
The first open meeting of the
Chemistry Society will be held in
Science 300 at 3 o'clock on Wednesday, September 30.
Dr. John Allardyce, who has recently returned from McGill will
speak. His subject is to be "An
Initiation to Biochemistry." All those
interested arc cordially Invited to attend.
The first meeting of the season of
the Mathematics Club was held at
the home of Dean Buchanan on the
evening of Wednesday, September 23.
Mr. Ralph James gave an interesting
and informal talk about the University of Chicago and his work there
on the Waring problem. Refreshments were served and after an enjoyable social hour the meeting adjourned for the evening,
There are still a few vacancies in
this club and any third or fourth
year students of mathematics who
wish to join are requested to send
their applications to Gwen Humphreys, Arts Letter Rack, before Saturday, October 3.
V. C. U.
The Varsity Christian Union is off
to a flying start with the brightest
of prospects confronting it. The first
two, meetings, held on Thursday and
Friday of last week, were exceptionally well attended.
Daily meetings are held in Arts 204
at 12:05 and all interested are urged
to attend, a hearty welcome being
assured for everyone.
On Wednesday a special speaker
will address the group.
A Women's Athletics meeting will
be held in Arts 100, to-day at 12:15.
The various club presidents will outline their activities. All freshettes
must attend.
The first meeting of La Canadienne
will be held on Friday, October 2, in
the Faculty Room, Cafeteria, at 3:45
p.m. Afternoon tea will be served
and the programme will consist
mainly of Informal conversation and
discussion. Member, are requested to
bring fee. and 25 cent, for tea.
For the purpon of electing the rest
of the executive the Literary Forum
will hold a meeting on October 8 at
12:05 in Arts 105. Member, are asked
to turn in nomination, for secretary-
treasurer to the president, Kay Crosby, a. soon as possible. A definite
programme is being planned immediately after the election. All member, should have a few suggestions
ready. Applications for membership
will be considered at thi. time.
All those who are Interested in
rowing are urged to attend a meeting
in Ap. Sc. 102 on Thursday at 12
o'clock. Freshmen especially should
turn out this year, as very few of
the older members are back. If possible, a Freshman Eight will be
trained, so that they can challenge
the Senior crew next Spring for the
right to represent Varsity in races
with outside crews.
(Continued from Page One)
A meeting of the U. B. C. Guide
Club will be held to-night, Tuesday,
September 29 at 8:15 at the home of
Mrs. R, W. Brock, Point Grey Road.
Mrs. Dallas Perry will be the speaker.    All Girl Guides are welcome.
Dr. Nicholson, the former Registrar
of McGill University, is in the city
and will be glad to address the pre-
medical students of the University
if a sufficient number are interested.
For details communicate with Wm.
C. Gibson, 214 Union College, Phone
Pt, Grey 51.
Lost, small oblong hand-made
purse containing money to value of
approximately $10.00. Please communicate with D. Wilkie care of Miss
Todd, Department of Nursing.
or less de-pantsed condition. Fired
with ambition, and vowing to wreck
vengeance, the Sophs proceeded in
their cars to Connaught Park. It
was decided to disperse until two
o'clock when a larger and more concentrated attack would take place.
Picking up several more Sophs en
route, the grand finale of the evening was about to commence. One
car reconnoittred, and on returning,
reported the outlay, which was favourable, inasmuch as the Frosh,
feeling the calls of Morpheus, had
dropped off into a sound and untroubled slumber. Approaching with
the stealth of a Siwash the Sophs
deposited upon the pyre enough oily
rags to demolish ten such bonfires.
A National Centre of University
Information for foreign students and
Italian students abroad has been
founded in Rome under the auspices
of the National Committee for Intellectual Co-operation (established
under the law of the 31st December,
1928, n. 3423) with the object to coordinate Italian intellectual activities with those of the same Interest
developed abroad within the boundaries of the Organization for tho
Intellectual Co-operation of the
League of Nations.
Bursary Students
To Meet in Arts 106
AU tho3e who received bursaries
from the government to continue
their studies nt the University, are
askd to attend a meeting in Arts 101
On Friday, October ?. at 12:20. Since
there is a vn.-y important matter to
be discussed, nil are asked to make
a special effort to be present.
Ethel Lawson Boak
Conservatoire Royale, Brussels
School or Violin and Piano Playing
Junior Piano Classes
Special terms for children
Studio: 5826 Balsam Street
Open to Non-Resident Students
Three Meals For One Dollar
Special attention given to Club
Dinners at 40c per plate.
Smart Footwear In
Black kid shoes blend in
perfect harmony with all
the new and charming
clothes for autumn. A
pair for every costume is
correct and economical
too! Sizes 4 to 8 in widths
A to D. 07 BA
Pair  tp/aVV
—Second Floor.
The Vancouver Sun
"Vancouver's Home Newspaper"
Last Year's "TOTEMS" Now On Sale
Room 303 Auditorium
ii% Mnlwrattg of Brtttatf Columbia
Information to Students
All cheques must be certified and made payable to
"The University of British Columbia."
Mailing Certified Cheques to Bursar is Recommended.
1.   The sessional fees are as follows:
For Full and Conditioned Undergraduates
In Arts and Science-
First Term, payable or on before Oct. 5, $65.00
Second Term, payable on or before Jan. 18, 60.00
In Social Service Course-
First Term, payable on or before Oct. 5, $65.00
Second Term, payable on or before Jan. 18, 60.00
In Applied Science—
First Term, payable on or before Oct. 5, $90.00
Second Term, payable on or before Jan. 18, 85.00
In Agriculture—
First Term, payable on or before Oct. 5, $65.00
Second Term, payable on or before Jan. 18, 60.00
In Nursing and Public Health-
First Term, payable on or before Oct. 5, $65.00
Second Term, payable on or before Jan. 18, 60.00
In Teacher Training Course-
First Term, payable or on before Oct. 5, $40.00
Second Term, payable on or before Jan. 18, 35.00
Alma Mater Fee—Payable on or before Oct. 5,....$10.00
Caution Money—Payable on or before Oct. 5, $ 5.00
For Partial Students
Fees per "Unit"—Payable on or before Oct. 5, $12.50
Alma Mater Fee—Payable on or before Oct. 5, 10.00
Caution Money—Payable on or before Oct. 5, 5.00
For Graduates
Registration and Class Fee—Payable on or before
Oct. 5,—First Registration > $30.00
Each Subsequent Session  5.00
After these dates an additional fee of $2.00 will be
exacted of all students in default.
The Alma Mater Fee is a fee exacted from all students for the support of the Alma Mater Society. It was
authorized by the Board of Governors at the request of
the students themselves.
The Caution Money is a deposit from which deductions will be made to cover breakages, wastage, and use
of special materials in laboratories, etc. If the balance
to the credit of a student falls below $1.50 a further deposit of $5.00 may be required.
2. Immediatey after October 5 and January 18 the
Bursar will notify students who have not paid their fees
that steps will be taken to ensure their exclusion from
classes while the fees remain unpaid.
3. Students registering after October 5 shall pay
their fees at the time of registration, failing which they
become subject to the provisions of Regulation 2.
4. Special fees are:
Regular supplemental examination,
per paper   $ 5.00
Special examination, per paper .... 7.50
Graduation     25.00
Rereading, per paper   2.00
Supplemental examination fees must be paid two
weeks before the examination, special examination fees
when application for examination is made, and graduation fees two weeks before Congregation.
I*>^.. •»-**•' Tuesday, September 29,1931
Page Three
Contributions to this page
may be left in the
ROOM 206
Pep  and Pun
You know Header, we have juit
discovered a horrible fact. Our columnist is entirely without opposition. Therefor-* it behooveth uth to
take up arms, and sally forth to do
battle. Throughout the following
column we will endeavour to emulate the stylo of our worthy con-
temptuary.   Let's go.
The*other day we went over to
talk with the Literary Editor (yes,
Grantham does do this) and exchange puns with her. Rudely evicting Sport from his chair to do so.
But no sooner had we rat us down,
than the News Manager, curses on
his soul, suddenly swooped down
upon us and knocked all the breath
out of our body with the approved
forehand swing of all true Pud
bouncers, saying at the same time,
"What the urnp-te-da-da do ya mean
by picking or a fella smaller than
yerself, you ump-te-dump-de-dump
Arising with what dignity we could
collect on such short notice, we
pierced, him through and through
with a steely glare and stalked away
to our desk Inwardly muttering malediction., but outwardly icily cool.
"Shame on you! Vou big brute-
blubbed sport, "I'll tell Himie on
you. See if 1 don't. So there smarty."
But we held our peace, refusing
to be ruffled by even such dire
threats as these. Remember speech
is silver, but silence is worth more
in these hard time.!, especially now
when the gold standard has been
abondoned. Caesar had a gold standard. His legions always carried it
with them and thus ensuied themselves a high rate of discount. A
worthy   idea  forsooth.
As this is a column, no definite
train of thought is needed, unless it
be to carry off nme rather heavy
figure of speech.
Wo have just been acused of being none other than our worthy opponent. The News Manager, grrrrr,
was the cause of it all. He sent a
new member of the Pub ever to our
typewriter, who (not the typewriter)
smiled sweetly and said, 'Mr. Grantham, how do you spell suspicious?"
That put the lid on it. Rising to
our feet we opened our editorial orifice and howled, "SUSPICIOUS," at
the top ot our voice, ana then
turned and fled. «
I—i—,.—..—..-—._.._.■_..—■■.——ill,    *•—•■—••—.._..—..._.._.._..._„_,_m|i
Mucking With Shrdlu I I     Prominent Grad
un in i li    »—t—T-a
Think Sol j
Parson — Phonograph —Paragraph.
Conneet 'em If you can. And if you
can't, 1*11 explain. (The elite may have
heard Vivian Foster, the "Wlrelew
Parson," in his funny phonograph records. He took the role of a bashful
parson at Mother.' Meeting, and garden partie., and mixed his foollahnew
with »me profound (?) sayings which
usually ended with the phra»e I have
borrowed for this column-"Ye., I
think, to." Since the man with the
pipe and pen had .wiped a really good
title, and I couldn't hope to write
without a pen and a pipe, I decided to
take the Irreverent Vivian', phraae
1or the title of my colyum. Hence
Parsons-Phonogrph-Paragraph. Ye.
—I think so.
After all, it isn't so bad a title for
a column such as this. It could cover
both wit and wisdom, if Achilles,
Agamemnon and I could supply It
And for the "I," that is just a mild
disclaimer of the world's responsibility for my thoughts. Despite my news
and semi-official position of reporter
for the A. T. C, my thoughts are my
own (praise be, said Achilles.) And
the column doesn't Intend to be too
serious, even if it breaks out now
and again in a rash of news items. To
tell you the truth, it's not really the
two A's and I who are writing—we're
under the control of Addison, Steele
and perhaps Sammy Johnson—Spectators writing from another Club—
the College on the Campus, (for the
information of Freshmen we might
mention that the gentlemen aforesaid
were collaborators in the course
known as English 2 a—and Achlle.,
Agamemnon and Ulysses were fellows
that the gentlemen would have liked
to have been.)
Since I mentioned Freshmen, I
might as well talk of another green
thing—the grass of the new Stadium.
You who came back last Wednesday
hardly realize what a lot of work you
got for your $20,000. 1 had the opportunity of watching quite a lot of
it—worse luck. It would have rejoiced your susceptible hearts to see those
manly figures toiling away in heat,
and cold, and the Library telephone
booth. And now you have it. Tuum
Est—yes, I think so! At least, the
track is yours. The field is to be allowed to grow a little more grass
before those nasty football players go
and spoil it all with home runs and
Anyhow, it is all very nice and if
we back up last year's good work by
further efforts, we can hope for a
first-class field worthy of the University (which is us.) Somehow, as a
member of a residential College, one
comes to take a greater interest in
the playing fields and buildings of
University. I think that is why the
College put in such a great effort in
the Stadium campaign, being one of
the few groups which raised its apportionment. Improving the old home
town—Yes, I think so!
In a college that has some men in
matric, some in theology, some in
Varsity, the students return at different times. Most of the Arts men are
back again, but two explarations
mightn's come amiss. Sidney Simple
missed his boat by two hundred miles
and was still near the North Pole at
the time of writing. Bob Ward is
staying out for a year. I'll think we'll miss him both in Varsity and College. He has promised to be my Foreign Correspondent, so you may expect important news and views from
that hub of the world, Ahoushat
(don't say it—sneeze it, says Achilles.)
As for the addenda, our company
next year will include the four horsemen of last year's Apocalypse (the
first horse race on the Stadium,) also
First Impressions Of
U. B. C.
By a Parititnne
The languid approach—the feeling
of superiority—the haughty sneer on
our rosebud lips—the impression that
attending U. B. C. is indeed an ignoble ending to our mighty .tart at
the Sorbonne.
The arrival at the campus—the
proud walk-the thrust out chest-
the smug expression on our face—
the startling discovery that U. B. C.
has a very beautiful camptu—tho
amazement at the sight of the quite
imposing buildings—the suspicion
that maybe thi. is a bigger and bet-
ter University than one expected.
The bewilderment a. to where to
go and which building is what—the
muttered remark that the exterior of
U. B. C. is beautiful, and tho gasp
of sheer surprise at the right of tie
mountain, and Ma in tho distance
The dismay and Indignation that
no one has noticed our arrival—tho
disdainful spirit of condescension with
which we approach a certain blonde
lady to inform her of our event—
the sweetness with which she enquires:
"Have you found your Big Sister,
The blow to our Senior Year pride!
The complacent remembrance that,
after all, one IS a Parisienne.
The first lecture—the surprise at
the brilliance of a sarcastic lecturer
—so much better than we expected
at U. B. C. The dread that this
same irony that now amuses us may
some day be directed against ourselves.
The second lecture—the desperate
search for room A 201—the horror
with which we realize that we are
a lone female in a class of a dozwi
or so men.
The lonely wandering through
thronged halls—the feeling of insignificance. The overwhelming desire
to kiss the Freshette who saves our
pride by asking us the way to the
Book Shop. Our delight that w*
are able to direct her.
The joy at meeting a friend—tiie
jolly lunch in the cafeteria—the Impression that U. B. C. isn't going to
be so bad, after all	
Begaud Freshies
l have not been attending the Uni-
vusity any great length of time, but
already I have observed a number
of particulars where improvements
could very well indeed be mads.
Having spoken of these to a gir!
in the third year who is a relative
of mine, she suggested contributing
something to the paper about how I
thought the University might be improved, and handing it in to the
Feature  Editor,  Mr.  Costain.
The first day I was out at the University I was observing the variuus
points of Interest my relative was
pointing out to me. And she pointed
cut Mr. Koshevoy and Mr. Costain.
The latter was evidently recounting
some amusing incident to the former. I asked to be introduced, out
she put me off with some remark
about learning to duck. I was anxious to meet them in order to discuss University life with men in
their position, and so consequently
took an early opportunity to make
myself known to them. I do not
mean to be critical of upper classmen, but I must say I was received
in a spirit of badinage which entirely
Ed Thain whom Varsity football fans
will remember, and about ten Unknowns, among whom I might include
His Royal Highness the Prince-Regent of Saitwitkostanani,—but I won't.
That's number one—and yes, I'll
think it will do. Thank you, Mr.
Butterfield. Of course not, Mr. Moyer!
Yes-I think so!
Away back In 1930 there was more
or less of a mix-up around the lily
pond which resulted in a number of
casualties. Some of the Freshmen
haven't got over it yet. Although
no one was drowned in the puddle
there was ample opportunity for
more than one young and innocent
Fresman to lose himself amongst the
lily-pads and frogs.
Such opportunities may occur again
and it is only fair that the students
should be Instructed how to act In
case they find themselves submerging for the third and last time.
If you ever find yourself in such a
predicament, do not despair. Be calm
and keep your head cool. To do this
effectually you might keep it under
water. Never, in any case, clutch at
a straw. The straw might break and
then where would you be? The most
sensible thing to do is to swim in
with the tide (even lily ponds might
have them) or wait for-low tide and
walk in. It was Willie Crawl, the
world's champion life-saver who assisted in 1000 accidents this year, who
said, "There Is a tide in the affairs
of men, etc." Remember that, when
you'ro far from home and can't
touch bottom.
On the other hand, you might not
be the victim of circumstance.. If
you mo a fellow student who is
struggling for his life amid the waters, of the lilies, do not be bashful.
Jump right in and offer assistance.
Grab your victim', coat collar with
one hand and with the other stretch
one of his ears until he i. willing to
pull you into shore. Having reached
land safely you must proceed to
bring the patient back to consciousness as quickly as possible. You will
be rather cold yourself so you should
dry yourself with a towel which
ought to be on hand for the occasion.
When you feel sufficiently comfortable for further life-saving operations, stretch your patient face
downward upon the ground and
point hi. chin upwards. If he squeals
pay no attention to him. In this
position you have him entirely at
your mercy. Now search his pocket,
for valuables and if you get more
than a dollar It is only right that you
continue in your effort to awaken the
spirits within him.
To do so, seat yourself comfortably upon the back of the unconscious one and place your hands over
his lungs. Now lean forward heavily
as if you were trying to shut the lid
of a trunk and count 24. Come back
quickly, but not too quickly or you'll
fall over backwards. Repeat this ten
times. By that time the patient
should have recovered sufficiently to
count for himself. If he is a Freshman and can't go beyond 10 or 12,
throw him into the water again.
Einstein's Pet Theory
Only fourteen (or is it fifteen?)
people understand it. Of course I
don't confess to be one of them but
at least I do believe that I've got the
gist of it. It is really quite simple.
To learn it you must supply yourself
with two lemons and a grapefruit.
On a moonlight night, proceed out-
of-doors and study the moon closely. Convince yourself that is is not
the same color as the lemon which
you hold in your right hand. Now,
calculate In round figures the distance between the moon and the
earth. Multiplatby two, divide by ten
and multiply m five and your answer
is the same m the one you started
out with. Cle'er isn't it?
Examine the yellow orb again and
see if you can detect any motion. You
can't, it's impossible, so you are ready
to make this statement, viz., that, in
the nature of things it is impossible
to detect motion with respect to space.
You can suck the other lemon, which
you hold in your left hand, while
you ponder over this.
With this theory tucked under your
belt you need not hesitate to go so
far as to state that Einstein is all
right and that he knew what he was
talking about (even if you don't)
when he mentioned an absolute frame
of reference.
Now, wasn't that simple. You'll be
so satisfied with this little lesson that
you won't noice the stains on your
vest afer you have finished eaing the
Mr. Roofus W. McGoofus
Pictured above, has returned to the
University, after a summer of adventure, to take up the well-known
Teacher. Training Course. He will,
as usual, play a great part In U.B.C.
disregarded the matters I had intended  bringing  to   their  notice.
This affair on Saturday night Cor
instance. I purposely refrained
from attending it, but from what I
hear, it was little more than a mere
brawl. And furthermore, If anyone
imagines that 1 Intend to make myself ridiculous by wearing a green
tie,  he  is much  mistaken.
I Intend that my University career
shall not be stultifiad by any such
idiotic capering. I Intend to express
my own individuality. I was purchasing a suit of clothes the day before I commenced attending University, and the shop man said, "Just
a trifle full at the rhoulders, sir,
but we will just pad that out nicely
there for you."
"No, I said, "My shoulders are of
Future Teacher
Tells Adventures
We are glad to near that Mr. R.
W. McGoofus is with u. again. A
man with such sterling qualities o*
his is welcome wherever he goes. He
has returned he told me, to take the
Teacher Training courn. Although
he did not inform me as to hi. occupation during the summer month.
I gathered from his converaatlon
that he ha. been doing a little globetrotting.
In China (those were hi. very lost
words) he vnited the birth place of
Chang Suey and saw the old-fashioned well Into which Mr. Suey, ns
a young lad, was wont to throw cats.
From the Orient he journeyed to
Australia. There he had the opportunity to study the Australians and
other animal life. While in Melbourne, he patented a device, which,
when attached to the pouch of a
kangaroo, would give it the well-
known zlppev effect.
In South Africa he experienced the
thrill of meeting a man-eating lion.
But perhaps I'd better let him tell
"We were travelling across the
broad veldt," related Mr. McGoofus,
"when suddenly we saw ahead of U3
an African lion. It was a wonderful
specimen, fit for the Kalamozoo zoo,
but it didn't appear to be as tame is
some I have seen. It stood directly
in our path. What were we to do?
Retreat to Kronstad and go to Hoop-
stad by way of Heidelburg or cut
across to Lumpstad and thence to
Pittsburg or we could go straight
ahead to Middelburg and Prieska.
"Yes," I decided, "we'll go stialght
ahead. If the beast makes a threatening motion, look him straight In
the eye. That's what my Maths,
professor always told me to do." So
on we went towards the waiting
Here Mr. McGoofus became quite
excited, and kept taking snuff out
of his snuff-box. "Slowly the creature crouched, bracing his huge fore-
paws against his hind feet so he
could leave the ground at a moment's notice. Bravely we marchc.l
forward, our hands on our guns and
our horses turned backwards. Now
we could see the glint of battle in
his eyes and we could hear the wind
whistling through his teeth We held
our gaze steadily. At a distance of
twenty-five feet the animal turned
his head towards my servant boy.
The lad terrified by the hungry
eyes, fled. A moment later my companion, too was gone. I alone was
left, Carefully I hitched my belt,
while I looked him straight in tho
face. The beast turned towards me,
his nose twitching with anger and
his tail beating a tattoo on th.'
ground behind him. He noticed me.
He looked me in the face, then
turned and ran. We got to Oompstad
before nightfnll."-T. H.
The Great
Handbook Mystery!
Dr. Todd to Stobie: Are you taking
honors, or did you come here for an
Prof. Topping (as fly buzzes around
his head: I wish I could kill that
fly. Must be sugar on my face.
Prof. Nolan—I've seen a horse that
cculd calculate better than I can
Prof.   Wood—(discussing   cntrover.
sj)    They met  In  Nsw York.    Or
was it Pittsburg?   It wasn't Chicago
cr they'd have shot each other.
Ron Grantham—Hurro keet!
course youthful; but I will not hive
any adventitious aids to my appearance." And it is in the same spirit
that I decline to begaud myself with
green ties."
These are one or two of the masters I had in mind. I repeat, I do
not mean to be intentionally critical
of University life as I find it; I mere-
wish to take the opportunity, now
that I am here, to set a few things
First Year Arts.
Across the quad we sped, leaving
a trail of dead and dying behind us.
Emile, who holds the record for the
Arts to Science building sprint, soon
left us far behind. Straight towards
the library he tore and forded the Illy
pond in two jumps. Up the front steps
he stumbled falling into the horible
maw of the revolving door. From our
position afar off we could we the
great man whirling round and round.
Finally he shot fort, to land In a
sprawling heap at the bottom of the
steps. Quick as a flash Emile was on
his feet. Darting down the step, that
lead to the basement he disappeared
from our sight.
"Hurry," gasped Silo Vance, "we
must not allow him out of our sight
or they'll get him like they got the
Frosh bonfire last week.'
At last we reached the Library,
Down the stairs we scrambled to
pause outside the mens common room.
From within came a high whirring
sound that row to a high crescendo
and then sighed away to a blood-curdling! gurgle.
"Come," .aid Silo Vance to me,
"Emile I. In there. Wo must rescue
With the ilustriou. detective leading by a good foot we plunged
through the door, knocking down
Emile who stood directly in our path.
"Emile! Emile!" I babbled, "are you
all right? Did anybody frighten you?"
"Shut up, you idiot," were the great
man's first words. "The durned sound
wa. only th. electric hand drier."
Gentley I collapsed to the floor, and
for a moment wa. a raving lunatic.
Emile, observant fellow that he is,
told me later that I even foamed
at the mouth. But I was not allowed
to remain in my natural state for
Mystery Again
Emile stood staring over my prostrate body at a gaping hole in the
floor. In three and one half strides
he reached the opening. The half
stride wa. when he stepped on me.
Reaching down Into the hole, he
siezed the top rung of an Iron ladder, and commenced to clamber from
our sight. Instantly following my
friend, Silo Vance began to descend
after him. A few seconds later I followed him.
We stood at one end of a long dimly lit tunnel. Above our heads the
iron trap door clanged shut to the
accompaniment of demoniacal laughter.
"Aha," a voice came faintly to our
ears, "now you are in my power."
"Humph," snorted Emile, brave as a
lion in the face of danger, "Who cares
about your old power. Let's go,
Striding purposefully ahead of us
he led the way along the tunnel which
gradually narrowed as we progressed.
The roof too, was noticeably lower.
After what seemed an eternity of
stumbling along the half-lit tunnel,
we came to a small steel door, set in
a corrugated iron wall.
As we stood hesitating before the
barrier, an electric light globe above
our heads flashed on, and the door
swung open before us. A gust of cold,
damp air smote us full in the face.
Never hesitating a moment, Emile
scrambled through the small door.
"What's in there?" hissed Silo
"It seems to be a drain of some
sort." replied Emile, "Come on in."
Awkwardly we crawled into the
narrow drain. It was about three feet
high and made of corrugated iron.
A small stream of water gurgled about
our feet. There was absolutely no illumination in the long tube. Suddenly
the stream of light from the doorway was blotted out. On the other
side of the wall we could hear the
bolt of the closed door being shot
"That makes two doors some obliging person has saved us the trouble
of closing," remarked Silo Vance' in
a flippant tone.
It is in moments such as these that
men show their true greatness. Neither of my companions failed their
test, so 1 took a sup. in courage and
passed with them.
Emile said not a word but from the
splashing noises I knew he was exploring his way about in the inky
"This way," he said, his voice booming hollowly along the length of the
drain, "Downstream."
From behind me came a splash followed by a grunting sound. "Curses,"
came the voice of Silo Vance to my
ears. "1 slipped."
"Hurry," cried Emile, "there is not
a moment to spare. Our lives depend
on our speed."
Forward we splashed, until a low
cry from Emile arrested our progress.
"Oscar," he breathed to me, "I've
discovered another door."
We have just made the awful discovery that we have been
spelling the name of our hero in "The Great Handbook Mystery" all wrong. It appears that the true way to spell the darned
handle is Emil, not Emile. However the hero does not seem to
mind the terible handicap which this places him under. For he
continues his adventures under the same old misspelled title.
Attaboy, Emile.
This issue sees an innovation on our page in the form of a
short column which is entitled "Pep and Pun." and is dedicated
to the interests of the Student body as a whole. Why should
readers of more than average intelligence be forced to search on
another page for a column when the Muck Page is capable of
producing as good a form of tripe as may be found elsewhere
and in shorter form.
Another newcomer to our page is the column "Yes—I think
so!" which is the combined effort of three literary-inclined
gentlemen, Ulysses, Achilles and Agamemnon. The purpose of
the column is to bring to the unenlightened majority the news
and amusing stories of our brother theologs, who now are, by
the way, full fledged members of the Alma Mater Society.
Perhaps the Reader would like to meet the author of our serial through the medium of our page. In anticipation of this request we will publish his picture as soon as we have sufficient
space. The writer's name, by the way, is Oscar Scribblewell,
Again we have noticed how widely read our serial is. Since
the last issue, we perceive that both Caf doors are opened,
whereas formerly only one portal was kept ajar. It is such improvements as this that prove the true worth of our page.
Curious Muttering.
Of Pub.
The following article 1. written in
a curiou. jargon which originated at
tho Pub camp at Boundary Bay last
summer.    Perhaps   the   most   outstanding feature of this lingo is that
no one but the partie. concerned I.
really able to jabber it with any degree of certainty.   Now read on—
Hurro strange.   How yo do.
Oh, Ima prit goot. Howsa wf.
Howsa wifenkeeds.
Whatcho min oke, huh?
Oh, yono watchlmin.
Uh, uh, I nono.
Waffo yonono?    Orra tarn yo dono
Yo savvy missing?
Uh!   Sho.
Yo savvy "K"?
Zen you savvy oke.
Thassa lotta Bennenna lie.
Yo rike for fight wis me?   I'm prit
goot for fight.
Sho, I rike.
Oohoo!   watchable  man!!
What you got?
"I gotta—honions—stringa blnz -
speenich—grappa frootz— pineopples -
preena pep— cucumbs— wede potat-js
—musharooms—stroomberries — cabbages — carrots — collyflows — ag-
gplantz—rodesh—sporragoos — ploms
—pitches — bananz — epricots — unt
Again, as before, a light flashed
on overhead, but this time the door
did not open. At the same moment a
loud roaring sound reached our ears.
"Horrors," groaned Emile, madly
struggling with the door. "They've opened the flood gates."
To Be Continued
I   Litany Coroner  j
T*' " " mi ii    iii i iii    _m
I often
The reader
Ever pauses
To think
How easily
How quickly
Fill up space.
Being a reader
Or she
Will not have
To think,
This is
The Muck Page.
Eligible young bachelor would like
to meet gullible Freshette. Opjec-
tion matrimony. For particulars Me
G. Root, Campus.
Doug Cox—"What's an average,
R. Fletcher—"Something hen. lay
eggs on."
With or without board, In comfortable private home. Use of sitting
room, piano, etc. Terms moderate.,
4453 W. 12th Ave. P. G. 749 L
of U. B. C.
And All Others Who Are
In University Affairs
Don't let your interest in activities at Varsity
cease with graduation! Get the latest campus
news at first hand through the columns of the
"Ubyssey" and do your part in the upbuilding
of an informed and appreciative public opinion,
on University matters which is of vital importance to the future growth and progress of this
The "Ubyssey" will be mailed to you anywhere for only $3.00 for the entire 1931-32 session. You may pay when subscribing if you
wish; otherwise you will receive a bill in due
Just send in your name and address to the
Business Office,
Publications Board,
University of B. C.
and   the "Ubyssey" will be
mailed to you
"Keep in Touch with Your Alma Mater
Through the 'Ubyssey'"
A Page Four
Tuesday, September 29, 1931
Men's Athletic Association Meets Today
General Fall Meeting
To be Held in Applied
Science 100 at 12:15
Question of Student Athletes On Outside
Teams To Be Considered — Honorary
Presidents   To   Speak — Reports
Will Be Passed
The annual fall meeting of the Men's Athletic Association
has been called for noon today in Applied Science 400, at which
the reports of tiie subsidiary clubs will be accepted and any
outstanding business settled. Because of the importance of several of the matters that are to be discussed, all of the men on the
campus are asked to be present.
Apart from the discussion that will ensue with the reports, the
question of U. B. C. athletes, who are playing on outside teams
is to be given much consideration. In the past, the Alma Mater
Society hi. been lenient In thi. re-f
gard, and no action has been taken
against those student, who were competing against the University squads.
The matter reached a crisis last spring
when a Varaity basketball team was
forced to drop It. franchise because
of a lack of players, while .everal
student, were admittedly playing on
outside team, in the nme division.
In commenting on the subject, Gavin Dirom. president of Men's Athletics, ha. pointed out that it i. within
the power of the Student*. Council
to a* the President to expel any
member of the Alma Mater Society
who deliberately disobeys the society
coMtltutlon. Today the question will
be carefully considered and tome definite form of action decided on.
The remainder of the hour will be
taken up with speech., by the honorary presidents, Dr. Gordon Shrum
and Dr. J. G. Davidson, and with the
dlscuMion of any matter, that are
brought up during the course of the
Los Angeles A.C.
May Oppose U.B.C
Ruggers This Fall
Varaity English Rugby men are
promised a busy season if present
plan, are carried out.
In a meeting of the English Rugby
Club on Monday, the possibility oi a
visit from the Los Angeles A. C. at
Christmas and a return series in California in March was outlined. Jack
Tyrwhit, B. C. R. U. Mentor has forwarded such Information to the Rugby
Club and thi. new. should prove a
stimulus to senior aspirants.
It 1. understood that the team to
make such an excursion will be an
all-star squad of the men who do not
make the Japan tour. Dick Nixon ha.
gone into a huddle with Dean Buchanan to see if it 1. poolble for men
making the trip to the Orient to re-
ctivo credit for first term work.
Tod Clarke wa. elected President of
the Club to succeed Gil Mcllmoyle,
who has not returned to Varaity.
A practice tor, the Frosh team will
take pla '.e on Tuesday at 3 pan. and
for thu 'nt? mediate, on Thursday at
the same hour.
Who's Who In Sport
The Men's Gran Hockey Club will
hold its first General Meeting of the
year on Wednesday at noon in Art.
106. Officer, for the year will be elected at this meeting, and general plans
for the year', activities will be drawn
There are vacancies for new member, in the club at present. Applications will be welcome, whether the
applicants know the game or not. Any
men desiring to join the club should
sign their names on the notices which
will be posted on the Bulletin Board.
"No Better Value
In the City"
C. D. Bruce
Cor. Hastings at Homer
President of the Men*. Athletic Ex-
ecutive, backfield Mar on the Big
Four Canadian Rugby team, outstanding track man, a smart baefcetball
player, just a few of the reasons that
make Gav. Dirom the outstanding
athlete on the Varsity campus. In th.
last four years the husky Scienceman
has made Athletic history at the University of British Columbia, and his
graduation next spring will leave a
vacancy that will be very difficult to
Plans of Varsity
Shuttle Club Set
For Coining Year
The Badminton Club held its first
meeting of the year on Friday noon
with President Ian Campbell in the
chair. About twenty prospective member, were welcomed to the club and
it wa. announced that for the present
the Badminton Club wa. to hav. the
use of the gymnasium on Monday and
Thursday night, from eight o'clock on.
It wa. decided to enter two team,
in the C. division of the Vancouver
and District Badminton League tills
year a. there ia much promising material among the new-comers and one
team in the B division a. formerly.
Mr. Van Dusen will act In the capacity of honorary president of the Club
this year, whi'e Mr. Black of the Education Department will be honorary
New members of the club will have
a chance to riiow their prowess this
week as play-offs will begin shortly
for places on the team. Those who are
desirous of learning the game will
be coached by the older members of
the club.
Badminton has been raised to the
status of a minor sport this yeur so
it is expected to enjoy an even greater
popularity than In former years. The
execulve of the Club for 1931-32 is
as follows: President, Ian Campbell;
Vice-president, Ellen Gleed; Secretary-treasurer, George Weld; Committee, Frances Tremaine and Denis
The election of the executive of the
Ice Hockey Club was the main item
of importance at a meeting of thc club
held Saturday noon in Arts 108. Dr.
Carruthers was elected honorary president, while King Gregor will wield
the conductor's baton for the year's
activities. Other members elected
wertf Lome Falconer, secretary, and
Ernie Carswell.
The possibility of fielding two teams
for participation in city leagues was
discussed as several students from
prairie colleges are .attending U. B. C.
this year. The budget for the /ear
was passed.
Reports from the B, C. Rugby Union that the
Los Angeles Athletic Cub is anxious to send a
squad to Vancouver for a series of games with
Canadian teams during the Christmas Vacation, has been received with glee by the Varsity Ruggers. Especially is the proposed trip of
interest in that a B. C. team will journey south
in March to repay the visit if the Californians
come north in December. Charles Paddock,
one-time the "world's fastest human," and Dr.
Harry Warren, a U. B. C. graduate, are backing
the proposed trip.
In connection with this, there is an interesting cup in the trophy cabinet that adorns the
lower concourse of the Library. The World
Trophy, In bygone days, was emblematic of the
International Intercollegiate English Rugby
Championship of the Pacific Coast, with Iceland Stanford Jr. University as the chief contender of the United States. Eventually Stanford discontinued the sport but the Olympic
Club of San Francisco continued to send a team
to B.C. each year. However, this gradually faded and for several seasons there has been no
competition with Californian Clubs. The coming of the Los Angeles team, which marks the
re-opening of these yuletide games, should be
of great assistance in fostering English Rugby
both here and in the South.
This is not a tale of Varsity sport, in fact it
does not concern athletics, and has, therefore,
no apparent excuse for appearing here. But It
contains a little lesson in courage, sportsmanship, iwd Varsity spirit that might well be taken to heart by the entire student body. George
Crane is a Freshman at U. B. C, but unlike the
other members of class of '35 he can neither see
nor hear, while his speech is very limited. To
attempt a college course with these handicaps,
in itself, demands a courage that few of us can
equal, but Crane has set a new standard in
Varsity spirit by attending the initiation and
undergoing all of the hating that the other
frosh were subjected to. If every student at
this University had the spirit and courage
shown by this man, there would be few U. B.
C. teams defeated in sport, in debating or in
any of our extra-curricular activities. Here is
an example that the class of '35 and indeed
every member of the Alma Mater Society
might well consider carefully. We take this opportunity of congratulating Crane and
wishing him every success while at the University of B. C.
Here is just a little news from the prairies
that looks interesting; Jim "Soup" Campbell,
who starred with the University of Saskatchewan during the last year, is now taking Medicine at Manitoba and will probably be assisting the Brown and Gold in their Hardy Cup endeavors this fall. And in addition these young
Manitoba college boys stepped out and took
the wily grads into camp 26-16 in what is termed a wild passing game.
Another little flash in the pan from Winnipeg. Mike O'Shea, an outstanding member of
the Toilers Basketball squad, will be fighting
for his Alma Mater this year. Looks as if the
Blue and Gold will have no cinch in retaining
the Rigby trophy.
For Sale—One slightly used set of
false teeth. Owner will sell separately if necessary. Terms, apply Box
.073 Pub.
In Action
The Men'. Athletic Executive held
the first meeting of the year in the
student*, council office Monday noon
at which several Important items of
business were discussed.
The executive passed a motion of
considerable importance to follower.
of basketball in sanctioning a committee to investigate the situation with
regard to Dominion playdowns, relations with American teams, and examinations. The committee was named as follows: two members of faculty, Dr. Shrum and Professor Davi.,
and Gavin Dirom and Lorn. Falconer
representing men*, athletic. The basketball club 1. anxious to have a clear
understanding a. to how far they
should recognize their respoiwlblllty
to the basketball public of B. C. a.
well as the University In representing the Province in the Domlnon finals.
A letter wa. read from a proposed
B. C. Track and Field Awociatlon and
a motion was paned to the effect that
the Varsity Track Club would join
thi. proposed Association should it
be formed.
The executive decided to make a
final attempt to put the Boat Club
on a sound bad. and to that end a
meeting i. being called at an early
date. If the club doe. not receive better rapport than it ha. in the part it
will have to be dropped.
A motion to rapport major club, in
their effort, to supply their teams
with shoes wa. passed with Sid Semple dissenting on the grounds that the
executive should be behind all teams
instead of supporting major sports and
leaving the minor sports out in the
In view of the soccer club's Increasing need for the upper playing field
it was decided to appoint a committee to see about getting the field into
better shape.
The main business of the meeting,
namely the construction of club budgets, was barely touched upon due to
lack of time and the meeting adjourned till Tuesday after passing
the English and Canadian rugby budgets.
All students participating In
organized athletics at the University must be registered with
the A. A. U. of Canada.
Application forms may be obtained from club executives,
any member ot Varsity Local
Board, or from the Business
Manager's office. Such an application must bo filed with the
Local Board before the Student
can represent the University In
any sport.
A nominal fee of twenty-five
cents (25c)    must be Included
* with the application.
Gavin A. Dirom,
Pres. M. A. A.
White Succeeds
Elmer Dickson
In Soccer Club
At a meeting of tho soccer club
Friday noon, Arnold White wa. elected to the executive of the dub fining the vacancy left by Elmer Dickson. Elmer was given tho post of
secretary last year, but being unable
to return thi. session owing to his
Attending normal school, it.wa. necessary to appoint his successor
The meeting wa. well attended and
prospects for a successful year wero
found to be considerably brighter
than at flirt appeared. A strong nucleus of last year's team Is available as tlie backbone of a fairly
strong squad for this year. The halfback line in particular will be very
strong, with Kozoolin at centre-half,
Costain at right and MacDougal at
left. Laurie Todd will be given a
trial at outside left, with his brother
Dave partnering him at inaide, whiU
Odie Munriie ha. returned to fill the
vacancy at centre forward. Tho right
wing U nib undecided, but Bud
Cooke will vory likely fill In at Inside
right MacGUl, a new comer from
tho Sons of Scotland Football Team,
Will be started at right full-back with
George Grant u hi. partner at left.
Ken Wright or Pete Frattinger are
likely possibilities for the position ni
goal, keeper.
Manager Donne expect, to have hi.
junior team lined up by Wednesday, so any prospective candidate,
are urged to attend the practice on
that day if they wirii to make the
squad. Both Lams will be playing
on Saturday, but it i. not yet known
who their opponent, will be.
Thi. week promises to be a very
busy one for the club. Following the
practice on Wednesday a meeting will
be arranged for either Thursday or
Friday when the learns will elect
their respective captains. A chalk
talk will be' arranged and It is very
likely that a matter of unusual interest to members of the club will
be discussed. ,
Strong In
Entries for the annual Fall Tennis
Tournament, which will commence on
Monday, October 5, are now being
received. Those interested (and all
those who play tennis are urged to
enter) will please sign the lists which
are posted at prominent places about
the campus.
A meeting open to everyone interested in tennis, is being called Tues.
noon, in room Arts 104, when the
Tournament, the Club fees and organization, etc. will be discussed.
Students residence on the
West of University Lodge
$35 double room, two
beds, two study tables.
Hot and cold water in
each bedroom. Shower
If the word, of one Lome Falconer
can be relied on, Varsity should field
one of the smartest senior "B" basketball team. thi. year that ha. worn the
blue and gold In lo these many seasons,
According to the aformentioned Falconer, Varsity has so much of the eligible basketball material that the opposition are uttering loud wails of
protest to the grand old men of basketball.
From last year there seems to be
Jimmy O'Neill, "Biff McLeod, Bill
Lucas and Gordle Root while Ken
Wright and Bob MacDonald will also
be available for duty.
Ot the new material, Foublster of
Victoria, Clarke of Lord Byng, McDonald of Ex-Magee and Ran Matheson of last year's Intermediate champions, the Highway Fur, seem to be
in line for positions on the team.
For the present the senior "B" candidate, will practice with the senior
team and after a bit of seasoning will
be asdgnad their own coach and practice hour, at the gymn.
The intermediate "A" squad also
traem. to be lining up nicely and
should go a long way In atoning the
dire failure of last year. Jack Cotton of Ryerson will be on hand a. well
a. Ken Sloat of Bratjdon College.
C. Ridland of New Welnlnater Y 1.
also reputed of being a Basket Shooter
of note and should fit m well with
the machine. Pryor of Vars'ty should
lend experience and Hal Gilley of
last year's Duke of Connaught squad
should be able to snatch off a place.
A  general  practice  will  be  held
Best Wishes
U.B.C. Season
When that Class
Dance or Social
Event takes place.
A touch of novelty
and originality that
helps to make the occasion a success will
be seen on the Dance
Programmes, Invitations or Menus when
they are printed at
Fighting Students Grid
Team Loses First Tilt
Blue and Gold Canadian Rugby Team Fails
To Score In Last Minute Rally—Green
Student Squad Shows Great Promise
Showing the traditional college fighting spirit, a dauntless
blue and gold grid squad took the field against the highly-touted
Westminster Dodekas and held its plunging line from crossing
for points in the Canadian rugby battle at Athletic Park, Saturday night. The collegians were hard pressed most of the time
keeping back the sweeping Royal City plays, and managed to
hold the score down to 5-1 against Varsity. The Dodekas eked
•ut their victory by means of the stellar kicking of Niblo and
the sparkling runs of Doug Mclntyre.
U. B. C, started the tussle with a
The following letter, of particular Interest to athlete., have
been forwarded to the Ubyssey
office by Gavin Dirom, president Men'.- Athletic Association.
To Student. Playing on
Outside Teams:
May I call attention to the
following excerpts:
"No student I. allowed to
play for other than a University
team during tho University sessions."—Page 343-1931 calendar.
"Any athlete intending to play
on any outride team must obtain written permlsrion from
Men*. Athletic.; If such I. not
done, the athlete Is liable for
suspension from all amateur
athletics." Page 96-1931 Calendar^ handbook.
Applications, stating full particulars, must be In my hand,
by 5 p.m., Friday, October 2.
Gavin A. Dirom,
Pros, M. A. A.
Coed HWpsters
Monday, Wednesday arid Thursday
were the day. decided on for practises by ihe Women'. Basketball Club
at a noon hour meeting Friday.
Them will be definitely announced
ai the Women's Athletic meeting on
Muriel Clarke, the president, urged
ell those interested in basketball,
with special reference to Freshettes,
to turn out for practices, saying that
they should not be discouraged by
the famous record of former team
players, as many of these had come
into the club beginners. She expres*
ad the hope that there would bo
enough good player, to enter three
team, in tne League thi. year.
In the gym at 3 o'clock and all candidate, for position, should turn out
if possible.
10th and Sasamat
PHONES:  DAY,  ELL.   1331
NIGHT, BAY. 8359
Education Student must leave University at 4 o'clock sharp Monday—Friday, going to Granville and Broadway.
Phone Bay. 1210 L after 4.30 p.m.
Good fee offered.
Five men students can get
good room and board in quiet,
clean home at reasonable rates.
4585, 13th Avenue West.
Frank L. Ansoombe
Dry   Cleaning   •   Pressing
Remodeling   •  Repairs
4465 W. 10th Ave. P. G.
Call and Deliver
triumphant march down the field at
the beginning of the first quarter, but
then began to fade badly as the heavy
opposition began to take its toll In
tiring out the players. Dirom played
a great game in stemming the Westminster avalanche and when called
on to carry the ball, consistently made
yards. Gordon Root scored the student's lone point with a lusty kick
that sent the ball soaring over the
fence early in the first canto.
Varsity also suffered through tho
heavy penalizing by referee Finlay
and played men short during the majority ot the battle. Westminster continually made yards but the students'
line held in the crucial moment, and
the Dodekas i fumbled when they
might have scored in the third quarter.
In the second quarter the opposition
forced Varsity down to its line and
then Niblo kicked the field goal that
won the game for Westminster. It
wa. only a matter of inches that
would have saved U. B. C. from defeat.
Varsity had its other moment hi
the fourth session when Dirom went
wild and ran the ball down to Westminster's five yard line where after
two futile buck. U. B. C, tried a forward pass that Just mined being completed and also just missed cinching
the game. Westminster took thi oval
and again pressed the collegians
It wa. a hard fought struggle
throughout and the collegian, wero
forced to kick time again on a first
down due to the number of back-
field player, off the field on penalties.
The students were given little opportunity to get their plays going due to
this reason.
For Varsity, Steele, Murdoch, Root
and Dirom gave stellar performance,
in their fighting back the attack
while in the line Brown, Jack, Peden,
Mitchell and Perdue showed some of
the old stonewall quality. In fact the
enure team should be given credit
for the performance they gave after
being worn down and out-weighed by
the Westminster squad.
The team—Perdue, Brown, Mitchell,
Hall, King, Peden, Wfflisoroft, Jack,
Bain.., Morrison, Bolton, Farrington,
Steele, Gordon, Dirom, Hedreen,
Waimsley, Mclnnes, Chodat, Murdoch,
Root, Moore, McGulre, Collin*.
Will swap on. football shoe, English 2 note, and laat issue of Ubyssey, for transportation to and from
Varsity. Apply Lome Falconer, Business Office.
Announcing all
the new lines in
Athletic Equipment and Sports
Clothing by Spalding.
A. G. Spalding
& Bros.
Phone Sey mour 5041
424 Hastings W.
Phone, write or call for a copy
of the new Fall and Winter
566 Seymour Street
University Book Store
Hours: 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.; Saturdays, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.
Loose-Leaf Note Books, Exercise Books and Scribblers
at Reduced Prices
Graphic and Engineering Paper, Biology Paper.
Loose-Leaf Refills, Fountain Pens and Ink.
Pencil and Drawing Instruments.
Crepe Paper for Masquerades, etc.


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