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  CiTR Presents:
SALE!
20
10%O
ONE DAY ONLY
OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK
_0Ftf9AND T-SHIRTS
SCS, TAPES AND POSTERS
ECEMBER 26TH 9:00AM-6:00PM
ET BETWEEN DUNSMUIR & WEST PENDER
644 CONTENTS
JANUARY* 1990 Issue #84
SHINDIG
And the'
THE JAZZ BUTCHER
Tania grills Mr. Fish     9
YOUR TOP 20
The best Ipsof the 80s as chosen by yoose  11
SHE
Scott Chernoff talks to Exene Cervenka  12
D • MAGAZINE
Our special pullout section from the future just for you   ><
ACID WASH CASUALTIES
The Man Sherbet interviews three of the past decade's fashion burnouts  22
■.■■■■■■■■EIS£I_BHHHHHHHBHHI
AIRHEAD
First class mail for a third class guy     5
HELL'S KITCHEN
Things what lived and died in the 80s - remember Wigwags?  14
RAG BAG
Dress: Semi-Formal, tie-dye optional   15
LOCAL MOTION
HEY! Let's get Janis...she listens to everything!   16
REAL LIVE ACTION
Koko Taylor, Doughboys  17
ON THE DIAL
It's like TV guide, but it's for the radio   18
SPINLIST
"WE don't HAVE a top ten list here at CiTR"   19
COMIX ARE ALL I READ
Chew on a Lump of Squid - The Preservation of Obscurity is this month's read  20
UNDER REVIEW
You say: "What's new, man?" We tell ya  21
DISCORDER DATEBOOK
What's on, what's hot, what's hip and what isn't   21
■___H___________________________HK^^
EARTH GUY
Scott Fearnley     3
DANCING ON THE CLOUDS
Marc Yuill and Julian Lawrence   10
SOCIALIST TURTLE
Colin Upton   15
ROLAND THE HAPPY WANDERER
Geoff Coates  17
FOR OFF CE USE ONLY
EDITOR Kevin Smith ART DIRECTOR Scott Chernoff PRODUCTION MANAGER Bill Baker EDITORIAL ASSISTANTS Viola
Funk, Lisa Marr PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS Valerie Lawrence Juniper, Den Lebei WRITERS Tania Alekson, Bill Baker,
Scott Chernoff, Betty Cooper, Viola Funk, Michael Klassen, Janis McKenzie, Laurel Wellman, Leigh Wolf GRAPHICS
Geoff Coates, Stephen DeMuth PHOTOGRAPHERS Peter Devrles, DaveJacklln (D • MAG Cover), Mandel Ngan, Lydia
Schymansky WORD PROCESSING Alice Hul, Alice Lorlng, Jennifer Menard, Laurel Wellman COVER Scott Chernoff,
Lydia Schymansky SPINLIST Andrea Cserenyl ADVERTISING MANAGER Mike Harding ADVERTISING PRODUCTION Bill
Baker SUBSCRIPTIONS/MAIL DISTRIBUTION Robynn Iwata PROGRAM GUIDE/DATEBOOK DUDE Randy Iwata ACCOUNTS BULLY Barb Wilson TECHNICAL SUPPORT Alex Johnson, Ted Aussem
DISCORDER Copyright © 1990 by The Student Radio Society ofthe University of British Columbia. All Rights Reserved.
Discorder is That Magazine from CiTR fM 102, and is published twelve times a yearby The Student Radio Society of the University
of British Columbia. Discorder is printed in Canada on paper manufactured in Canada. Discorder prints what it wants to, including
ihe CiTR On the Dial program guide and the CiTR SpinList playlist chart. Circulation isl 7500 copies distributed free to over 200
locations. Twelve-month subscriptions are $ 15 in Canada, $ 15 (US) to the US, and $24 elsewhere. Please make cheques or money
orders payable to Discorder Magazine. "The right to write badly was the privilege we widely used" - Babel. Discorder wants your
Deadline for submissions and ad bookings is the 15th of the previous month.
CiTR 101.9 fM is 1800 watts of stereophonic bliss on cable fM from UBC to Langley, Squamish to Point Roberts, but not on Shaw
Cable in White Rock (if you want it, you'll find a way). CiTR is now available on most clock radios and in cars too. Office hours
for CiTR, Discorder, and CiTR Mobile Sound Rental are Mon-Fri, 10am - 4pm (please avoid Friday afternoons) Call the CiTR/
Discorder Officeat 228-3017, CiTR News+Sports at 224-4320, or the CiTRDJ line at 228-CiTR. Send stuff c/o Discorder Magazine or CiTR Radio to Room 233,6138 SUB Boulevard, Vancouver, BC, V6T 2A5.   Fax (604) 228-6093.
ER®
INNOVATIVE HAIR SERVICES
• Tasty Haircuts
• Hair Extensions
• Superior Perms
• Colours of Your Choice WITH GUESTS
GRIN FACTORY
FORMERLY AFTER ALL
99 STEPS
THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 1ST
86 STREET MUSIC HALL
ADVANCE TICKETS $7 AT ZULU, TRACK & HIGHLIFE
DAY OF SHOW $8
AN ED BANGER PRODUCTION CLEAR AS MUD
Dear Airfiead,
A TRUE STORY.
I was taking a shit. Waterboys
were LOUD elsewhere in my place.
I was reflecting profound on the end
of the decade, the promise of the
next, and the realization arises...
...so much passion, optimism,
broad perfect dreams that never have
panned out, yet the light still lingers
AND SUDDENLY IT ALL COMES
CLEAR!!!!!! The 80s have been
mere warm-up and exploration. The
90s won't be so safe, neither so INCOMPLETE, muted, frustrating,
closed and controlled. The 90s are a
whole new arena. The fences are
down in the playground. The kids
take iheir games to the street. Does
the traffic demolish them... or do we
divert it?
Does any of this make any
sense? Like I said. The Waterboys
were on. And as the revery subsides,
a single line cuts through. "That was
the River, this is the Sea."
I mean, do we drown... or shall
we surf? There don't appear to be
any other options.
Bill Harper
UNHAPPY? TAKE A PILL!
Dear Airhead,
Ooooh! Heyyy!,
I really enjoyed Scott
Feamley's "Earth Guy" cartoon on
p. 3 of the November Discorder. I
can truly relate to it.
Also, I have long suspected
that I was the Archangel of Devastation. Now I realize that this is not
true! Thanks to Earth Guy!!!
Relieved,
Al-Ubhaid
Flagman of the Walled City
apdy-described-hell-hble food inferno is the realization of all those
books that told us what life was
going to be like "in the future". You
know, all that crap about moving
sidewalks and mega-malls and eggs
lhat have the "best before" date
stamped right on them... it's all here
like some socred soma-dream. Next
there will be magnetically levitated
shopping carts and stores will be so
big lhat we'll need jet-backpacks to
fly around them gathering our irradiated hot house tomatoes and hyper-evaporated refined and recycled
milk. Yuck! It all fits in with crap
like "Back to the Future" sequels
and other mind numbing future
shlock. So... BEWARE!!!
Burp,
Anthony
Pee Ess,
I liked the old-format Discorder better. Yo. Yo. Yo. This is true.
GOOD WRITING, GOODTIMES
Dear Airhead,
The story, "Rat Control",
which appeared in the December
issue ofthe Discorder was so good it
prompted mc to write the first letter
I have ever written to a periodical of
any kind. And the fact that I don't
actually have to mail it helps, too.
But seriously, The Man Sherbet, you
write good.
Yours truly,
Mike Fitzpatrick
"THE FUTURE"
Dear Airhead,
I was reading Viola Funk's description of the Metrotown Save-
On-Foods (which I frequent on
Monday evenings), and I was moved
lhat there was finally sc
found this... this... plac
thy of journalistic i
I wanted to point out that ihis
LIVING ART
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WINNERS
1ST PUCE - BUCK EARTH
The most experienced of the three Shindig finalists, not decided exactly what they will do with the material they
Black Earth has been around for about four years although record with their first place prize of 24 hours at Mushroom
the current lineup was settled upon only two years ago. Studios. These guys should not be confused with the local
Hailing from Steveston, John Hacock (guitar, vocals;23), Pink Floyd-like The Black Earth, or the British The Black
Gordie Park (bass;25), and Darrin Tonn (drums;22) have Earth.
2ND PLACE - @#*&! CARTOON SWEAR ■
Kris   Karra   (bass,   keyboards;24),   Ken   Gourlay nate from Montreal and Calgary. The Swear plan to record
(drums ;21), and Kent Alstad (vocals, guitar;24) comprise an LP with the aid of their prize of 20 hours recording time
this six month old Vancouver trio whose members origi- at Profile Studios, and then head out on the road.
3RD PLACE - PUNET OF SPIDERS
The Spiders are a quartet from Kelowna which has tar;21), and Colin Risler (drums; age unknown) intend to
been together for just over a year. Kevin Hodge (vocals, use their prize of 24 hours at Fluid Studios to record a few
guitar;23), Doug Dobbin (bass;24), Mathias Hulten (gui- songs for a new demo.
XbrllUt
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of
laking
English  language.
But everybody else
buys it so it must be
his
Thi:
the sort of thing
I'm trying to cope
with on this record
and, obviously, it
needs a bit of explaining.
Q: Do you see anywhere in the world
that's in a better
situation than England?
A: Certainly. Here
the U.S., Gerrr"
Spain. Soojrflbe EastJ
chance to tell the honest A: There':
truth. We have started writ- that. One
ing for the next LP and let go out to
me tell you, there's a few floating '
names get checked there.  of the h
Q:You've used sampling on doing thi
your last couple of albums, and we'
That's a new sort of direction. Why did you start using that and are you going ency,
reasons for and for the first week, t
thej:
try to grab the Kizzy was c^_1*r8JKhim Jean-
ter by the back Pierre4^|T^^y^^ecause
hought
L_rff_.
. ad met
iji*5rf**To. The
iffere it really benefits
Q: Does it bothe
you that people tr
to pigeon-hole you
style, to call you
e be
FOR OFFICE USE ONLY
INTERVIEW
Pat Fish (Jazz Butcher)
flip
pant
in your previous work. Have
you  lost  your  sense of
A: I just decided that it
was time to make it earn its
living. A lot of the humour
on our records came out of
the fact that we can't
really take ourselves seriously. When you see us on
the stage that's still the
case. As far as actually
writing humour, I never
really set out to do that.
There's about 80 songs I
have released, and of them
about half a dozen are
jokes. There's always been
humour in it but God forbid
anyone think of us as a joke
band. God forbid, what's
the point? I despise joke
Q: Your songs have not necessarily been jokes but
they've been called witty
satires. The satires seem
less witty and more seri-
A: People can take what
they want out of these
things. When they buy the
record and take it home,
its their's and they can
call it what they like. I
would never describe myself as witty or satirical.
If things seem to be getting a little more [seri-
There's a
! la:
lbum. I'm
quite willing to admit to
that. The basic blueprint
was "Oh God, London doesn't
work anymore. We're mad as
hell and we're not going to
take it anymore."
Q: I noticed on a lot of
tracks you mention somebody going mad. Do you
think you're going mad?
A: Well apparently so. I
must be, actually, because
I hadn't noticed it was
there until people started
pointing it out to me. It is
one of the themes on the LP.
When you live where I live,
and you look at stuff on TV,
and so forth, you think "My
God, it must be me because
this all seems completely
insane." How can I express
it, things are unbelievable. You get building
societies on TV, coming on
with adverts. Building societies (they're geezers
who let you have mortgages
to buy houses with) are
supposed to be non-profit
making organizations so I'm
kind of baffled as to why
they're on TV advertising
in the first place. And,
secondly, they talk about
the "financial product".
What is a "financial prod-
guy and thai
es, but t
; I understand it
because I like individuals. Most of the
people I like are
people who are individual in wildly different
ways. I suppose to an extent people perceive me as
a kind of nutty individual
stomping about. But I don't
like being perceived as
nutty for profit because
that's not what
I'm not hamming up the mad
Englishman  for  profit,
that's insulting. As far as
comparisons go, the trouble
is, people don't 1
hard enough. One gets tl
Robin Hitchcock comparisi
a lot. I listen to Rob:
Hitchcock records and
know the words and sing
along, and he listens ti
our records, but we'r
not really dong the
thing at all. He us<
imagination all the
he writes in code and I just
report literally what I see
going on around me. Most of
my songs are just reporting
absolutely  straight  the
things I see going on in the
street around me.
Q:   You say you like individuals. You used to have a
lot of references to individuals in your songs but
you haven't got any on this
album. Is tl
A: Yeah, we're saving them
all up for the next album.
The next LP is going to be
all about real people. There
is stuff about specific
people on this
Q: But there';
dropped.
A: No, but tha'
A: Yes. For one thing, I^.loo\i_ke^he Nr__WM< Mu- A: No way, no. I'm
think it sounds great. _*"4j»sica\ExprWk] said it was one. If I'm 50, I might go
rather listen tos«*MBbi«fcing M arjj_^ant of me to out and sit on a stool and
dialogue**$^L rJRo-^_^ve_t> band photo off the do something like Roger
logue than to jusVjuiVBk 3BPS*ve, but I think its Whittaker. I've already
"guitar s<_^L JV kind of arrogant to sit started doing those. I've
her sort dHp>__T- there with your photo on done dates in Germany,
n_, f^J-blues guitar solo, the sleeve. Paris, London, just on my
you can So we get to the paint- own. We didn't have a rec-
thing else to ing. The chap who did it is ord out and no one would let
:e Pascal Legras, a French the band out until the reels artist who's been follow- ord was out, so I was sneak-
is this business of direct ing us for a few years. The ing off to do these solo
reportage. Taking as a case- situation in France is that things. I have no inten-
in-point "Do the Bubonic -the "art community" looks tions of stopping playing
Plague". If I had just down on roll". It's not or things. I have no inten-
written the lyrics and sung like French-Canadians, its tions of stopping playing
it [singing] "They've got much more bourgeois and up- or recording. I'll keep re-
Bubonic Plague in Texas in tight. The art community is cording until they tell me
1985" everyone would've always giving him a hard I'm not allowed to have the
said, "Oh, get out. He's time for liking music. Poor money anymore. Touring for-
off his crust. What a crea- chap, he fantasizes about a ever, I don't what to do
tive wacky guy he is." But world where Andy Warhol that. But there's a couple
if I use the actual radio would hang out with the of years in the JBC yet.
broadcast from the Texas Velvets and David Byrne Since September, when we
there's no way they would be in with the art started doing serious dates,
ly its me being wacky, community and so forth. I've just been having more
Texas that's wacky. Since he wasn't in touch ,
JANUARY 1990 9 • Wholesale Retail Outlet for:
-100% Plain Cotton Fabrics
(36-88" widths)
- Broadcloth, Canvas, etc...
»Textile Paints and Dyes
»Tanks, Shorts and Sweats
»1 Day Workshops:
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"Fabric Printing Techniques
• Wearable Art
Mon-Fri 9:30 - 5:00 Sat 11:00 - 3:00
clothworks ^f
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textile dyes and pnnters
132 Powell Street, Vancouver Laurie Mercer, Feldman Assoc.
Peter Gabriel, Security
TaBimg Heads, Foot at Music
Roxy Mutic, Avalon
David Sowie. Lei's Dance
The Cure. Pornography
Joy Division, Closer
Dead Kennedys, Frankenchrisl
Bauhaus. Burning From The Inside
David Sowie, Scary Monsters
The Clash, London Calling
Velvet Underground, VU
King Crimson, Discptone
TheBealnigs. TheBealnigs
XTC, Drams and Wires
Husker Du. New Day Rising
Janis, Local Motion
Agent Orange. Living in Darknest
Laurie Anderson, Big Science
Butthole Surfers. Locust Abortion
Bu_>cock&. A Different Kind ot Tt
Lloyd Cole, Rattlesnakes
Cramps, PsychedeSe Jungle
Hoodoo Gurus, Sloneege Romec
Husker Du, Candy Apple Grey
Kitting Joke, KBng Joke
Pixies, Come On Pilgrim
Rank And File, Sundown
REM. Reckoning
Replacements, Tkn
Screaming Blue Messiahs. Bikini
Stow, Against the Glass
Spinal Tap, This Is Spinal Tap
Len Morgan, Oversou! Seve
ice, Lovesexy
or Threat, everything
iter Du, Zen Arcade
km thi. Flip Your Wk}
ss. Penis Envy
:k Flag, Damaged
■ Pixies, Surfer Rosa
War
», Wrong
'   MrfoGoesToC
Public Enemy. It Takes a Matto
Rudimentary Pent. Farce
REM, Fables ot the Reconstruc
John Zorn, Spy Vs. Spy
Chris Buchanan, CiTR Music Director
Violent Femmes. Violent Femmes
Joy Division, Stilt
New Order, Power. Corruption and Lies
Pixies, Come On Pigrim
Ministry, Land of Rape an
Public Enemy, 8 Takes a \
Big Black. Atomizer
Jesus & Mary Chain. Psychocandy
Billy Bragg, He's A Riot
Killing Joke. Requiem
Tom Waits. Rain Dogs
Grant Mcdonagh, Zulu Records
Three O'clock, Sixteen Tambourines
Comsat Angets, Waiting For a Miracle
The Times, Pop Goes Art
Soft Boys, Underwater Moonlight
Chesterfield Kings, Hem Am...
Subhumans, Incorrect Thoughts
tyres, tyres
Gruesomes, Grusomania
Slow, Against the Glass
Curious George, Children <
Vipers. Outta The Nest
TOP TWENTY LPS OF THE 1980s
1. Public Enemy, It Takes a Nation of Millions...(1988)
2. Violent Femmes, Violent Femmes{1983)
3. Replacements, Pleased to Meet Me(1987) Hw*'
4. Clash, London Calling(1980) ________________
5. Joy Division, Closer(1980)
6. Husker Du, New Day Rising(1985)
7. Smiths, Hatful of Ho!low(1984)
8. Pogues, Rum, Sodomy and the Lash(1985)
9. Tackhead, Tape Time(1987)
10. Billy Bragg, Talking to the Taxman About Poetry{1986)
11. Slow, Against the Glass(1985)
12. Prince, Sign 'o' the Times(1987)
13. Tom Waits, Rain Dogs(1985)
14. Jesus & Mary Chain, Psychocandy(1985)
15. Clash, Sandinista(l980) W ^^M
16. Replacements, Let It Be(l984)
17. Pixies, DoolittleO 989) __Pv_^^______.
18. Eno/Byme, My Life in the Bush of Ghosts(1980)
19. The The, lnfected( 1986} JJw*-*       _^dfl
20. R.E.M., Reckoning^984) ______0|l'!!JJ**^^^__P__B
Here you have it kids! The results of Discorder's Top Twenty LPs of the 1980s
democratic vote are in and we have a winner. It was a close battle but Public
Enemy won out over the Violent Femmes. The surprises of the survey must
be the lack of votes for X and Black Flag, and the absence of New Order and
the Cure from the final top twenty - four groups who have enjoyed a great
deal of airplay at CiTR over the years. Overall, though, the results are fairly indicative
of artists who have received heavy spin time at the mighty 'R during the past decade,
included on this page are the choices of some local know-it-alls. Because of personal
biases, Mr. Mercer and Mr. McDonagh both left local releases of their lists although
they feel there were a number of excellent albums.
Damned. Black Abum
Fleshtones, Roman Gods
Pm-*-.,....•;, LlcmalHottire
Nardwuar the Human Serviette
The Cranps. Songs the Lord Taught Ite
Untamed Youth. Some Kinds Fun
Dead Kennedys. Freeh Fruit For Rotting Vegetables
Fleahtones, Roman Gods
QOA,HardcomlBt
Villains. Lie ol Crime
Tell-T-ie Hearts, TheNewSeun
Pointed Sticks, Perfect Youth
The Zantees, Oul For Kids
Dale Darlington, The Waterwalk
The Replacements, Jim
Pale Fountains. Across the Kitchen Table
Marine Girls, Marine Girls
Tom Walts, Rah Dogs
David Sylvian, Secrets otthe Beehive
Elvis Costelto, Ten Bloody Marys...
The London Early Music Group. Bel Canto
Ermtylou Harris. Angel Band
Travis B., Electro Convulsive Therapy
The Uptown String Quartet Max Roach Presi
Pat Mullan, Odyssey Imports
John Battles, Casing AH Humans
Prince, Sign ot the Times
Public Enemy. H Takes a Nation...
V inous. On USound
d, SyMe S Babe
ie Day...
ncky Souvenirs otPreie
Sarah McLachlan, chanteuse
h Parry. Scratch Records
*imrtemen. Double Nickels on Ihe Dime .
Seatnigs, The Beatnigs
cock and ihe Egyptiar
1mnot God
ws, A Pagan Place
'•■:., 1 a Ion i.i  Pi   : dont ■-   .
Mtients, Hooteoanny
Peter Car..
Escape From Noise
Sister Do_>
» Happiness, Sister _
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U6EDBOOKJ&:
JANUARY 1990 11 stop the world
i wanna get back on
even if it's almost gone.
Exene Cervenka
was one of the mosl
visionary bands of the
early California punk
•hang. Singer Exene
Cervenka, singer and
bassist John Doe, guitarist Billy Zoom, and
drummer DJ. Bone-
brake: "The Baddest cats who ever walked
the earth." They played a fierce mix of hard
chord angst and roots rock Americana.
Exene, punk rock priestess, and husband
John, with their reckless voices and haunting poesy, delivered sermons of turmoil and
truth to a world gone mad.
After several great albums and a marriage
gone sour, X now seem destined for rock V
roll mythology. But Exene still sings the
blues - she just sings them a little softer.
She's made a record without X; "Old Wives'
Tales" is Exene at her best: music of the
apocalypse. Discorder met with Exene when
she recently passed through town. She told
us some tales - we wrote 'em down.
You're probably bored to tears with discussions ofX, but there are some points I 'd like
to dwell on.
Um, yeah.
Rumours persist that X has not officially
disbanded. What is the status ofthe group?
That's probably me, because we're nol people
that go around making decisions like "We're
broke up", "we're not broke up", "we're
back together", "we're louring". I don't care
about official press reports, you know. We^
never issued any kind of press thing saying*
we're broke up. We don'l have a record deal
right now: our record contract is up wilh
Elektra. But we never made any decision
whatsoever. Why should we? I just think
that's ridiculous. Thai's like saying, "O.K.,
I've decided from now on that I will only
read books that start wilh 'R'." You just
don't decide things. Maybe one day you go,
"God, il's so weird, for the last month I've
only read books lhat start with 'R'. Isn't that
weird?" I prefer to let things fall where they
fall and never ever try to force fate. But, you
know, we just don't even think about it.
We're X and we're always gonna be X. I had
a baby and John had a baby, and you don'l
have any idea what your future's going lo be
like after you go through somelhing like lhat.
You just let it happen - whatever happens.
But anything's possible in the future?
Anything is possible. If we get back, if we
play more, then fine. If we don't play more
shows, fine. We'll still be X.
You're still in touch with your old band-
mates then?
Oh yes.
What are they up to?
E: Well, John's making a record for Geffen
and D.J.'s playing with Syd Straw and her
ing critical if not commercial acclaim. It
seems that as the band evolved, il made
some calculated moves toward gaining a
wider level of acceptance, but was never really able lo get the attention it deserved.
Have you come to terms wilh being locked
out of the public eye?
I don't have to come to terms with it It's not
anything I could have done anything about,
and whal is in ihe public eye is stuff that I'm
so violently opposed to for the mosl part lhat
there could be no way that we could have
gone seriously after lhat. Of course, when
you're younger and more, idealistic - why
not say that - and you don't know the limitations of what you're doing, you of course
have never-ending hopes lhat you can actually achieve something lhat other people
couldn't. And some people do. I mean I think
that everybody achieves a certain measure of
success. I think the Chili Peppers, and Tracy
Chapman, and X, and Jackson Browne or
Holly Near, and people like that, have
achieved a lot of success. Even gelling played
on a commercial station like WBCN in
Boston - Ihey always played a lot of X - and
really good.
"Holly-
What's Billy Zoom doing?
I don'l know what he's doing.
When X made il's debut almost len years
ago, it was dubbed by many as the besl and
mosl important new A merican band, enjoy-
You'n
table then, with yourachieve-
Well, you have to be comfortable wilh
whatever you achieve in life. You cannot
have regrets and you cannot wish for more
than you have.
You've moved from Losgutgeles to Idaho,
Yeah.
You know, they call Vancouve
wood North".
Oh, really? He made a movie in Canada
recently. He made a movie in Calgary -
actually in a rural farming area near Saskatchewan - called "The Reflecting Skin".
And it's a really neat movie with an all-Canadian cast and crew, which is really nice.
How has motherhood affected your life and
Well, I learned how to play guitar and wrote
most of the stuff for the album afler I had the
baby and after I moved to Idaho. I never
could learn guitar in Los Angeles. I think it
was too intimidating with the people I knew
there that were such good musicians. And
also, I think I just nevermade time formyself
'cause there's so many distractions in a big
city. And when I got to Idaho I realized I had
a choice to not play music anymore 'cause
John was signed wilh Geffen and X wasn't
signed. And I figured, "Well, that's the end
of X, maybe - who knows, but probably.
What do I do now? I can do anything I want.
Do I want to be a poet? Or do I want to
paint?" And I ended up learning to play
guitar and writing songs, which made me
happy 'cause I could decide for the first time
in ten years what I really wanted lo do,
instead of being in X. And that's what I
wanted lo do. So I think lhat's why I'm so
happy now with the record and the tour.
So motherhood suits you fine?
Motherhood suits me fine because it gives
: to think and reflect about your life,
e doing is kind of mindless in
c you really use your concentra-
r mental abilities to raise a child.
• hand, sitting on the floor
r. and forth, or reading the
c over --■•* "Y(-| -*gj|[- hearing this
Are The Bombers on tour
with you now?
No, actually they're not. I
have a different bass
player, Duke. But Jim and
Tony are.
In the past you've appeared on record with
Julie's husband, Chris
Desjardins (of The
Flesheaters and The Di
ll,
Bul so does _•<
You know, pec
about iheir faml
world. But that'
In the past, you'v?
imagery in your wrilin\
from L.A. to Sandpoint
I don'l know if it was weird i
I grew up in a completely rural environment,
and then lived in Los Angeles off and on for
twelve years, considering louring three to
six months oul of ihe year, I was only in LA.
an average of six lo nine months out of the
year. It was a very welcome change. Bolh
my husband |aclor Viggo Mortcnscn] and I
just could nol wait lo gel oul of Los Angeles.
In fact, wc left with our son when he was
about six months old and we just drove. We
had no idea where wc were going. We just
left.
So it wasn 'I a decision to just get to Idaho?
No. Wc didn't have any idea. Wc looked at
a bunch of different slates and, in fact, we've
recently been thinking about going to Canada. But I don'l know if wc wanl to do lhal
I lolly wood. In fact, wc have lo go back there
for three months for him to look for work.
Whenever our money runs out wc have to...
there any plans for you to
return her fa vourandsing
on a Divine Horsemen at-
She's not in The Divine
Horsemen anymore. She's
got a solo deal wilh Poly-
Gram Records. She's a tremendous singer. She sings
like really amazing blues
and jazz standards and
stuff. Just tremendous. But
I don't think I'd sing on
her record. No, it's going
to be more of a straight-
ahead kind of thing.
How much of this album
is autobiographical?
Very little. I would say,
"Biggest Memory" and
um, I can't run through
every song. But I would
have to say... just "Biggest
Memory." The rest is about
other people, hence the
"he," "she," "ihey," "wc"
on the inside sleeve; except "Coyote on the
Town," which is actually
one Tony wrote about a
coyote, seen from a coyote's eye point of view.
But the others are about
friends and about people I
admire or would like to
know, like "Famous Bar-      -   .        , fI lr, .       -    _.
maid- is about a famous  / don't really see myself as cynical. I
that I don't know
like to. And
;tail Trees" is about
lend of mine who had a bad relationship,
universal female theme - and male
for that matter. "She Wanted" and
'Gravel" are about imaginary seditionaries,
revolutionaries, that don't exist, needless to
Interview by Scott Chernoff
tic or negative, or any of those words
it in my heart that
sion and any-
ng decision. The
I love him
and he's really smart ^tput music, and i
great songwriter. And H
can sing good and write good songs. So we
have a perfect amount of mutual respect, and
I know that he knows all these great musicians and can really work with people. I
mean, he's perfect as producer. I hope he
produces other people
Tony also plays guitar on the album and
lends some vocal accompaniment. Julie
Christensen of The Divine Horsemen also
sings. Whal can you tell me about the album's other players?
Well, Eliza Gilkyson is Tony's sister and
she's a singer. Julie and Eliza are really tremendous singers, and I was really happy
they sang on the album. And the other guys
are a band called The Bombers from Santa
Barbara, California. They're like an actual
band lhat Tony knew as a band and he said,
"Well, why get three guys who don't know
What about "White Trash Wife"?
That's kind of autobiographical. It's just that
thing about when you do things lhat are so
trashy thai your friends just look at you and
think, "God, I can't believe you did that.
You're sooo trashy." Mc and Tony worked
on the words to that a linle. Mostly that I
wrote, and then he contributed, I think, the
last verse or something.
Back to religion, you've consistently dealt
with the lopic with what appears lo be
somelhing of a morbid fascination...
Oh I don't think it's morbid. Why is it
morbid?
Well you write in a manner that seems to be
cynical towards typical religious altitudes.
I'm wondering if you're trying to find your
own spiritual identity hy writing these types
of songs. Or are you just making distant observations about other people and about
their situations?
I think that those two tilings are good and
perceptive of you. I think everyone's trying
to make their own spi ritual way in the world.
Constantly. And people who stop the search
and go, "This is my religion." I think that's
wrong in a way because I think that they
could discovermore if they didn't just stop at
a religion. And, I don't really see myself as
cynical. I don't think I'm morbid or pessimistic or negative, or any of those words that
have been applied to me. Because I think that
it's really important to think about these
things, to talk aboul these things, to not take
parts of life like death or unhappiness or
religion or difficult things that we have to
confront, like politics, and say, "That's not a
pan of life. I don't talk about thai." I talk
about... I talk about love. I talk about happiness. I talk about music. I talk about materialism. I talk about money. I talk aboulclolhcs.
I talk aboul sex. I talk about drugs. I talk
aboul liquor. But I think lhat it's just the
worst kind of perception of people like me.
Because I'm the one who has lo go out and
live and discuss those things because everyone else is too chickenshit to do it. And I
don't think it's morbid lo think about life as
a whole piece lhal can't be, you know, just
slice off pieces you don't want to accept.
You have to accept all of life. I think that
certainly "He's Got a She," even though the
people don't have any money, is tremendously positive because it's about people
who don't have money who are really happy.
And they have a baby and they could cat-
less if ihey have lhat junk.
You know, I've had people ask me why I
write about poor people. I'm writing aboul
12 DISCORDER MAGAZINE
THAT ESCULENT HARDCOPY LITERARY SUPPLEMENT FROM DISCORDER CHANNEL
FOR THE WEEK OF JANUARY 01-08 2000
THE UNDERGROUND™
710 Robson Street
(Above Gate 7, Pacific Seasons™ Mall),
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•we take pre - stylish new clothes before they debut as new
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except yon-
1) Which word best completes the following famous quote: "Give me
liberty or give me ."?
A) DEATH  B) MONEY C) PIES D) FIVE E) Don't Know
2) In the sentence "Attractive man wins prize!", a synonym (word with
same meaning) for "Attractive" would be:
A) HANDSOME B) WEALTHY C) ELDERLY D) UNIQUE E) Don't
Know
3) Which of the following words does not belong?
A) CONSCIOUSNESS B) ZAP C) STOP D) WOW E) Don't Know
4) Which solution correctly answers the following mathematical prob
lem: ((5x7)+2-13)/4?
A) AROUND SIX  B) TWOISH C) OVER TEN   D) LESS THAN ZERO
E) Don't Know
5) If you were riding a jet, and the plane would crash unless one person was
thrown off in mid air, which would you choose?
A) THROW MYSELF B) THROW A TERMINALLY ILL PERSON
C) THROW A MURDERER D) THROW MY BOSS  E) Don't Know
6) If you could change history in one of the following ways, which
would you choose?
A) KISS JUDAS AND SAVE UFE OF CHRIST B) KILL HITLER (started
world war 2) C) GET ELVIS OFF PILLS D) INVENT TV E) Don't Know
7) Finish the following quote "Able was I ere I saw .":
A) ELBA B) ELBOW C) HER STANDING THERE D) MANNY, MOE,
AND JACK E) Don't Know
8) Finish the following famous song lyric "There's a lady who knows / all that
glitters is gold / and she's buying ."
A) A STAIRWAY TO HEAVEN  B) THE WORLD A COKE C) AN ATTRACTIVE
WEAR-DATED SMOCK D) GOLD E) Don't Know
9) Which symbol is next in this sequence? 1_    3 8   53    7 V    ?
A)9e   B)88   C)tt  D)*«3^_r  E) Don't Know
10) Who was Neil Armstrong?
A) FIRST MAN ON MOON   B) WROTE "FOREVER IN BLUE JEANS"
C) CHEESEMAKER  D) A GUY I KNOW E) Don't Know
11) Read the following passage: Archie and Veronica are listening to
records (like DAT tapes) while Mr. Lodge, Veronica's father,
looks on. Veronica notes "I heard of some people playing board
games for over 48 hours!" Archie counters with "I know someone
who ate 36 eggs at one sitting!" Veronica replies "We could
break some records of our own, I betcha!" Suddenly, In walks
Mr. Lodge, and screams "Let's start with these!!" picking up the
fragile records. What would be the best title for this passage?
A) ARCHIE IN WRONG SONG  B) A MUSICAL MARATHON  C) THE
WORLD'S LARGEST OMELET   D) ROMEO AND JULIET E) Don't
Know
12) Which word falls next in this sequence: Morning, Noon, ?
A) NIGHT  B) LUNCH C) TIMEX™ D) WAKE UP E) Don't Know
13) The number of this question is:
A) UNLUCKY  B) A PRIME NUMBER  C) WHERE THE ELEVATOR WON'T STOP
D) 13 E) Don't Know
14) Finish this sentence: "I therefore I "
A) THINK; AM  B) WALK; DON'T RUN C) EAT; AM NOT HUNGRY
D) EARN; SPEND E) Don't Know
15) Ms. Jones makes dinner and it tastes bad.   She should:
A) CHECK THE RECIPE  B) EAT IT ANYWAY C) ADD MORE CHEESE
D)CRY E) Don't Know
16) Someone who feels happy all the time is:
A) UNUSUAL B) LUCKY C) A CLOWN  D) RICH  E) Don't Know
17) Which word best describes the sound of one hand clapping?
A) SILENCE B) SWISH! SWISH! C) CLAP D) FUNNY  E) Don't Know
Read this passage then answer the questions:
For 20 years Louis Wain painted sentimental realistic cat portraits captivating
Londoners. Had Immense popular success Illustrating calendars, albums,
postcards. Lived In seclusion with 3 spinsters and 17 cats. At age 57 Indications of psychosis appeared In life and art. Became convinced enemies were
Influencing mind with electronic Impulses. At same time cat portraits took
ominous turn. Wain spent last 15 years In mental hospitals, suffering recurring
dreams of persecution. Drew and painted constantly - always cats. Indicative of
psychotic state are cats' eyes staring with hostility.  Psychotic often feels a
threatening world staring at him.
18) The passage deals primarily with:
A) MENTAL DISEASE  B) AN ARTIST C) CATS  D) NEWS
E) Don't Know
19) The artist above was infatuated with (enjoyed) painting:
A) CATS  B) CALENDARS C) WITH PAINTS  D) .   E) Don't Know
20) Which title would best sum up the article?
A) "A SHATTERING PSYCHOSIS*   B) "CRAZED MAN PAINTS CATS"
C)   "HANG IN THERE, BABY!"   D) "A STORY TO READ"   E) Don't Know
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_ 'a qoea joj \ 'v qoea joj q ajoos :S3dOOS A word from us to u...
Sometime} life is funny. As we wander through this world, seemingly in a Stardust daze, agog at the wonders before us,
it behooves one to consider the changes that do occur. As poet laureate Robert Dylan once scribbled, the times ihey are
a changin'. But conversely, the more things change the more they remain the same. Or do they?
We still strive for the unreachable, for we are merely (or should I say dearly) human - it is our nature to want
what we may never obtain. But that is fine, or even more than that, it is necessary. The struggle of hope makes one's life
blood truly a blood of life, it lends our senses and assemblage a heart and soul, it enables our lives to take on form like one's
breath does on an icy winter mom. What does all this didactic prose have to do with D-MAG™? Well, recently yours truly
was savouring the joy of a fine Trendcor recyclable cigarette whilst leafing through past issues of said mag. In the October
1989 (Remember 1989, when people still really talked, and I mean TALKED, to each other?) issue I came across an amusing
letter written by one Mark Sladen in which he laments our change to the 'tabloid' format and possible "Yuppyizing" (archaic negative connotation intended) of Discorder* (D-MAG'S original name). It's amusing to look back and recall the lowly
level from which D-MAG™ has arisen and the roots from which DISCORDER CHANNEL™ grew, and consider what if we
had not been ambitious enough to pursue a dream, to reach for the unreachable; if instead we had been content to be just
Discorder* "that magazine from CiTR*", pandering to the so-called "alternative community", for only the most miniscule
of personal rewards in return. To change is to live, because life is change. Birth, life, death - THE recycling cycle - is the
basis of every human thought and sensation, and each issue of D-MAG is at once a birth, life, and death. For those of us
who work on this publication, D-Mog is the blood of life. Strive, reach, change - UVE. It's dl there is.
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THE LATEST OFFERINGS FROM THE PolyGrabb® MUSIC COMMUNITY      $
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BROUGHT TO YOU BY CUDD™ CHU-SNAX: THEY'RE ALWAYS GOOD TO BRING UP...
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BROUGHT TO YOU BY NICOTIME™- DONT YOU FEEL NERVOUS JUST ABOUT NOW?.
STATEMENT OF
OWNERSHIP AND
OPERATION
D - Magazine, that esculent literary supplement to
the DISCORDER Channel, Is published weekly by
DISCORDER Communications9Inc. The magazine
strives to provide a fresh™, alternative* and
underground* approach to the Vancouver entertainment scene. D • Mag prints what Its corporate
sponsors want, as well as the DISCORDER Channel* "In Your Eyes" Heads Up™ listings. D- Mag
omes submissions to Its classified editorial/
advertising segments by FAX at 228-968343. "I'm
gonna hammer those fuckers Into the ground with
my mighty words!" - Kinlskljr.
Publisher + Editor
Nardwuar the Human Recyclotron
Managing Editors
Thomas Harrison; Johnathan Mackie
Assistant to the Publisher
Karen Campbell
Production Managers
Donald Chow, William Mullan
Janitorial Staff
Richard Dean Anderson, George Puil.
Gaffer
Bruno Gerussi
Advertising Sales
Zippy 'Bill" Pinhead, David Gregg,
Steven "the Eclipse" Cheeper
Promotions
Thomas Anselmi, Dan "Kick" Martin
Art Director
James "Big Boy" Cummins
Staff Escort & Refreshments
Mary J. Kopechne
Chauffeur
Douglas Bennett
Breezeway Supervisors
Jack Munroe, Patrick Burns
Waste Disposal
Nivek Ogre
Catering
Jimmy Barber
Roadie
Christopher Crudd
Foreign Correspondent
Alex the guy from Tom Hooper ofGrapes of
Wrath's Alex t'arty Hate Club" Marty
MAGAZINE ™ b a wholly owned subsidiary of
imunications*, a member company in
the DISCORDER Channel* family of communications
.ORDER Channel* is 51% owned by
the TRENDCOR™ popular attitude arm, 28% owned by
Group*, 10% owned by D • MAGAZINE™ Inc., 6% owned by The University of British
Columbia Ltd, and 5% owned by the DISCORDER
Channel* family of communications companies. Edited financial statements for D • Magazine are available upon receipt of a properly completed warrant by
the offices of D • Magazine™ Inc. D • Magazine,
Discorder communications, the Discorder family of
comm unications companies, Trendcor, the Alternative
Group, and The University of British Columbia are all
registered trademariu of DISC0RPO RATION*, ©2000. Sign on 5:57 am; the D Channel is on the air:
5:58 - Up and Atom : host Art Bergmann.
Watch your favourite rockers lead you in a morning exercise class to the.sounds of
their latest releases; this mornings guest Paula™.
6:32 - Cartoons for Cybervores : host Mitchell Meateater.
7:04 - Cartoon News : Peter Ralston reads the latest breaking stories, from the
Middle East while introducing classic cartoons with his hand.
7:38 - Carton of Toons: esoteric cartoons from the eastern edge. Today Boris
Natalovia's Dance of the Cybers.
8:44 - Cyberdrama : a cd-vidcom presented in glorious cybercolour.
9:31 - Cannabis Cultivation : host Jonny Reeferseed dicusses the do's and don'ts of
hydroponics, plus daily growers guide.
10:12 - 777 Cybergnostica Lane : Aleister and Layla find themselves having an argument about advanced tantric theory.
10:45 - Cybercooking with Nardwuar: microwave mysteries revealed by
DISCORDER Channel's favourite host and publisher of D • Mag, Nardwuar the
human recyclotron.
11:07 - As The World Learns - D Channels environmental soap opera featuring a
cast of billions and starring old Mother Earth.
11:59 - Hot Lunch - vidcom previews, cd-rom reviews, the latest techno-news from
Tokyo, and lots o' cyberwisdom. Host: Ronnie.L. Flow.
12:41 - Make Mine New - a documentary orPthe emerging consumer religions and
their effect on the Gross International Project.
13:04 - Afternoon Vidstop - Tempered Treason, 1996. (Created for Pay-TV) The
story of a once powerful, now disgraced, former Actor/ Dictator still living in the
world's most post-industrial nation.
15:51 - Youth Terminal Uplink -the EDU Channel goes online with D Channel as
students get out of school. Hyperviolent protest reports, new discoveries, more
noise, and the best of toe-sex in fifty-three dimensions.
nightly features
15:51:54 - Home Animation - A showcase of student animation. This week's vid-
coms come from Cold Lake Canada, Heilbronn Germany, and Earth Station 17.
16:40 - Special: The ISS /Al Co-Conference on Holistic Healing. Sponsored by
the EDU Channel, this entire week live from NEW CHINA.
17:45 - The U-"Hour"* - With your host Umberto, the King of Umberto's Smock-
ateria.
18:40 -BGM (with your editor) in Concert. Live From the Commodore, Direct to
Satellite.
20:19 - Movie: Cocaine Vampires On The Loose (7 part Miniseries) (1991) Paranoid conspiracy theories abound in this hilarious black comedy from the creators
of Government Stole My Life, (home taping blip\expires Jan.08)
20:20 - Visual Feast: Interactive Ballet using studio holograms.
23:32 - Science Faction Theatre: Heavy Truths: A Cyberian play based the
Periodic Table of the Elements.
1:01 - Psychadelicatesseh - new vids from the alternate depths, hosted by the
Master of Middleclass John Trubee.
2:35 - Teddy Bears Picnic - Music and words from Galactic Central.
3:33 - 2 Minute Sign-Off - we readjust our transmitter just for u.
3:35-Nightly Sign-On.
4:401 Vegetarian Crockery with Pasquali. Sponsored by the EDU Channel,
this entire week live from NEW CHINA.
4:55 - What are your neighbors thinking? - Weekly results of VRCA Consumer
Aptitude Test hosted by Douglas Miller. Compare your answers and see if u fit
in!
5:09 - Best of McDonald's™ - This week's favourite commercial classics
include: "Old guy gets a job" in which we learn the value of our senior citizens,
and "Special Sauce", a touching musical that heralds the importance of inter-
ethnic cohesion.
5:21 - Visual Feast: Skydiving shock therapy - join convicted felons in your own
home through holograms!
5:32 - The Krystal Korner: Bringing in the Aquarian age - souvenir smocks,
autographed by your dead relatives and the host-channeller Dana Zalko available at Umberto's Smockateria only $349.
5:45 - Psychadelicatessen - new vids from the alternate depths, hosted by the
Master of Middleclass John Trubee.
5:52 - 5 Minute Shutdown - dead air as we shutdown to allow our equipment to
cool to a safe operational temperature. Get some sleep - we'll see you soon.
>»Remember: every hour on the hour DISCORDER Channel presents
"A Masturbatory Moment" featuring various rising new stars in very
provocative skits...just for your own personal satisfaction!
DISCORDER™ CHANNEL ANNOUNCES NEW TVI / HEADS UP™
TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH!
Scientists at the DISCORDER™ laboratories
have announced a further software/hardware
combination update to the aleady available
Transmitted Vision Interface technology made
av ailable in North America by the Heads Up!! ™
Corporation with their Heads Up!!™ Lifestyle
Command Center, and in Japan by SONY with
the Walkworld™. The new updates, outlined
in the key below, will allow TVI users greater
freedom - not only in that more choices will be
available to them, but in that the pocket-sized
transmittereci ver has been reduced to the weight
of a pack of cigarrettes, and is the same size,
too! In addition, customers will now be able to
custom-design the TVI contact inserts for that
added fashion extra!! (photo at left shows new
TVI Contax™ with the familiar D • Magazine™ logo).
DISCORDER™ CHANNEL UPDATE 5.53 CONTAINS THE FOLLOWING:
•elimination of troublesome pay-as-you-view charge indicator
-weather, shopping and news channels for greater variety
-interactive game preview area to be used wilh TVI Power Glove™
-fully interactive telephone interface for increased convenience and communicative ability
sion now easjer to adjust using feather-touch controls on t
WEATHER
AND TRAFFIC
INFO
ELEPHONE
INTERFACE
BATTERY LOW
WARNING
you   C>»A/Tget enough of that SUGAR  KRISPT
MARVEL -  SONY PRESENTS:   00M1
sjc^co-fasnttasttik: co_v*r_<       ]
Hey all you cyberfolks, leigh here with another fabulous report from the world of comik consciousr
in from Tokyo where the premiere of Alan Moore's latest videocomic was a smash sucess. Over
jammed into the Tokyo Sports Arena for an intimate gathering to celebrate the release of Sons of
third chapter in comics biggest ever commercial hit.
The publicists told us that 32 million copies were being shipped worldwide and half that nt
pre-sold. What a party! Kevin Eastman (Turtles) and Dave Sim (Cerebus) were carried away on i
imbibing too much happy powder while editor emeritus Cat Ironwode was said to have been lookin
after the shindig.
Speaking of Cat, her ex-business, Eclipse Comics and Tapes, has just bought up the rights
Trek I episodes. Seems the good folk at Eclipse want to re-re-re-release the shows as a videocomii
cross-indexed historical commentary. Hoo-Boy!
Mark Beyer (Agony) has moved to Ireland to escape the IRS. His income was estimated at
year and Mark has decided that offshore is the better part of valour. Charles Burns (El Borba), Ma
in crime, has negotiated a new deal with Sony-Marvel that gives him complete creative freedom, f
scheduled to be a videocomic adaptation of Kant's Critique of Pure Reason.
Peter Bagge (Pee-Bag to his friends) has bought the complete R.Crumb catalogue and is thre
the whole lot if Sophie continues with the divorce proceedings. Uh-oh! In a related item, Aline Komin;
to donate her body to UCLA Medical if the school can come up with a reason for wanting it
Under the heading of Whatever Happened To? Ex-wunderkind Chester Brown (Yummy Fur), \>
ago forhis startling visions, has finally surfaced. Seemsthe "brilliant young creator" dropped out of i
feature films. His entry into that moribund industry explains why he appeared "to drop out of sighi
part of a decade. Talk about flogging a dead horse. Meester Cheester, haven't you heard? Rim is di
reverse progression and get back into comics where you belong. Billions await your return.
The final word on the comics-payola scandal of '99 is in and your correspondent walked av
Good lawyers and clean living will tell. So until next time, psyanora. LRW.
SCIENTISTS CALL IT "POST-PRONDIAL HEADACHE"
YOU CALL IT "A LSTTLE TOO MUCH MSG"
THE POLICE CALL IT "BREAKING THE LAW
USING OR OBTAINING M0N0S0DIUM GLUTIMATE IS A FEDERAL OFFENCE.
REPORT ANY MSG USERS/DEALERS TO YOUR LOCAL CSIS DETACHMENT
HAVE
THEE
YOL
~AL\
fi
ITS-
D • Magazine 4 L Motion
by Janis "Reel-Tek Synthetic Leather™" McKenzie
So hey, funky dudes and babes, if your TVI's been on the blink for the past month or so and you haven't seen me on the L
Motion Reel-Tek™ Soothing Toons Show plugging this thing, here's your last chance to take my advice and put on your Reel-Tek
™ fringed pants and platforms and head down to 86 Street™ this weekend for the best show so far this year, DOA with Deviant
and the Clones, on the first night of their North American Be A Rebel Almond Champagne-Method Sparkling Wine™ Tour.
This hot mama (and the kids, natch) are gonna be there, in our matching puce and black Reel-Tek Punk Rock Ensembles™ from
that nifty place Hate Ashbury on theCommercial Throughway. But besides the free Synthetic Leather (and Be A Rebel Almond
Champagne-Method Sparkling Wine) samples I'll be handing out, it'll be worth showing up to see DOA's brand new lineup: Tom
Hooper (once of the hippie-type band Grapes of Wrath, recently named Reel-Tek's Synthetic Leather Dad of the Year) will be
joining Joseph S., Ian Noble, Mike Shea, and Randy Bachman for the first time on 86 Street's rustic Reel-Tek Pine Cone and
Heaps-O-Snow ™ revolving stage. And, as always, daycare facilities are included in the $59.95 ticket price. Bargoon!
Well, that's all I've got time for now. And if you're reading this, all I can say is, get it together and buy a decent TVI (Reel-
Tek makes great ones, the Heads UP Lifestyle Command Centre™, starting at only $1200) and tune in to the real thing, the L
Motion Reel Tek ™ Soothing Toons Show!
Feng Development™ and White Rose Realty™ present:
OUR TIMES with
DR. M. SHERBET
FENG CHUI?
GESUNDHEIT.
I After two demoralizing shut-outs from
'city council C.O.P.E. party representatives still feel they have a say in Vancouver's future.Few,
except for the remaining basement suite renters not yet pushed
outside Vancouver proper, support their contention that Kerris-
dale has become another West End. Certainly, density figures
might bear them out, but Kerrisdale is, let's say, high-density
with a difference. Look at Kerrisdale's lavish new Feng Gardens, then stick it in your respirator, Mr. Rankin.
The four 30-story towers that make up Feng Gardens are a
marvelous hybrid of classical Roman design, and the pleasing
principles of the eastern "Feng Chui." The towers are consciously placed in perfectly aligned north, south, east and west
directions. Each toweris meant to representone
season of the year. Developers have kept some
of the most striking design features for the "fall"
and "winter" towers in order to stave off the
expected rush for"spring"and "summer's" suites.
Residents of a similar development in Bellevue,
Washington describe the "harmonizing" effect
their homes have on them. "A surprising balance
is struck when one is in tune with the year's birth,
growth, and death," says ex-Californian Mary
Sunshower.
Another unique difference at Feng Gardens is
the chic underground Burger King™ restaurant,
lying below the towers' terraced court-yard. The
restaurant's spokesperson explains this will be
the first of a number of adult-oriented eateries,
which they expect will draw the high number of
child-less couples in the city.
The anticipated clamor for suites will begin
January 2, 2000. One day, January 3rd, will be
for sales to white Canadian citizens only, which
should calm the nerves of Vancouver's anglo
minority.
PILED BY
LRW
less. I just flew
25,000 people
Watchmen, the
imber had been
; to the old Star
c complete with
ten figures last
rk's old partner
lis first effort is
;ateningtoburn
sky has decided
mown ten years
comics to direct
t" for the better
ead! Cease this
YOU CHECKED
XPIRY DATE ON
IR CLOTHING?
wire use
l CONDOM
rHE LAW!
Call 766-7332-86 for booking information.
One other bit of good news on the Kerrisdale development front. Infamous holdout and bungalow owner, Sam Bartlett, was carried out of his
home on a stretcher just after agreeing to sell his
propertytoWhiteRoseDevelopments.lt seems
all his defiance over the building of White Rose
Towers (stage three) cost him his health. He
shouldn't be worrying about hospital bills though.
White Rose bought Mr. Bartlett's 70-year old
bungalow, pear trees and all, for a tidy $ 3.5
million dollars.	
"OVERHEARD ON YOUR PHONE LINES THIS WEEK"
Male Voice:Tve put the body in a bag and it's in the freezer. A couple hours from
now, no one's gonna know the difference"
2nd male voice: "OK, but let's remember one thing if (name) hears word one,
we're gonna fry."
Male 1: Who the hell's gonna tell them...you? (laughs)." Dec. 30, 1999 15:54 hrs.
sounds familiar, you had b
Last week's loser: Mel Barnsby, 6'
following: "I'll dress up in my old Boy Scout's uniform, and you can be the old lady...ai
IJI have to help you accrosji the street, ok?" - Call "The Boy Scout" at 244^458^87JI_
Sendorz Pharmaceuticals, manufacturers of Serenitabs* antianxiety tablets, presents another look at our stupid history.
DON'T LOOK BACK!!
NOTE: Long time Discorder channel™ scriptwriter Patrick
Carroll recently discovered the following piece, written in 1979
for his high school newspaper, and we thought it might be
amusing to reproduce it here:
What can you say about a year that marries punk rock
to disco (Blondie's "Heart of Glass") and also embraces new
wave to the extent that The Knack's LP goes gold faster than
any 1 st release (13 days) since the Beatles? Damned if I know,
but here with no particular order or coherence are my thoughts
on 1979 and the decade to come.
Aside from The Knack, an obvious choice as the band
to watch during the next ten years, other new wave bands that
made a mark this vear include The Police, Joe Jackson,
Talking Heads, _. ar end release from a new group
called The B-52s. Out ot tnis collection I can't see any of them
making any lasting impressions, aside from The Knack of
course. I mean, think about it, you've got The Police who are
some sort of spikey haired English Power Trio (a bad idea all
round), Joe Jackson is too ugly to be a pop star, and the Talking
Heads are too clever to appeal to anyone but some sort of urban
professional - how many of those can there be in the world?
Finally, these B-52 guys and girls are just too out of touch. I
mean, Beehive hairdoosl! This was old before I was born; the
60s ended ten years ago, stop it already! Anyway, they are from
some god forsaken small college town in Georgia and whoever
heard of any bands from the south except Molly Hatchet and
Lenard Skinnered (sic)?
Bands that do matter begin with Fleetwood Mac, whose
Tusk is a brilliant followup to the exquisite Rumours. I would go
as far as to agree with Rolling Stone that this is their "White
Album"! The Eagles continue to make exciting records, and
ELO's greatest hits package shows them to be the exciting pop
innovators I've always said they were.
For the eighties I predict the end of all these soul-less
dance bands with their drum machines, especially the English
ones. I also tend to think that black musicians are going to be
playing to a black audience; the days of crossover pop acts like
the Jackson 5 are over and those boys are going to have a lot
of spare time on their hands. That's it for 1979, and remember
to hold on to those wideleg disco pants, they will be big in
England in ten years.
"ime for a relaxing Serenitab®
BETTY
YBERBAOT
Smocks, beautiful smocks. Day by day, work or play, we all wear
them and we all love them. I stopped by Umberto's Smockateria #43
in the Yellow Zone of The Mall to chew the fat with Pinky, Umberto's Work-Star of the Week.
Betty: That sure is a nice smock you're wearing, Pinky.    -
Pinky: Thanks, I just got it at Umberto's Smockateria #79 in the
Green Zone.
B: Same with mine!
P: Small Mall! Heh, heh, heh. But seriously, Betty, you can search Ihe
great Malls of the planet but you won't find a better smock anywhere
than right here at Umberto's Smockateria with 107 stalls to serve you
all day, every day.
B: One hundred and seven stalls!
P: Well, I'll let you in on a little secret. There's no Umberto's
Smockateria #13 because that's bad luck. But more stores are
opening all the time including nineteen in The Mall's brand new
Chartreuse Zone.
B: So how did you get to be Work-Star of the Week?
P: I sold 27,000 smocks at Umberto's Smockateria #43. But I really
have Umberto, Founder and King of Umberto's Smockateria, to
thank for that because these smocks are so beautiful and well-made
they practically sell themselves! Made of a comfy yet o-so-durable
and stylish cotton-vegy blend, each smock from Umberto's Smockateria is painstakingly hand-stitched by our staff of specially-trained
chimps. And of course every smock is expiry dated.
B: How come?
P: Umberto, Founder and King of Umberto's Smockateria, is the
pioneer of Fast 'n' Fresh Fashion™. When he started the very first
Umberto's Smockateria almost seven years ago in that little stall in
the Blue Zone, he had two things in mind: Fashion must be Fast and
Fashion must be Fresh. From those basic ideas, Umberto, Founder
ind King of Umberto's Smockateria, developed a smock that is
versatile yet ultra-stylish, planet-friendly yet comfortable. Each smock
is dated for Fashion Freshness so no one will ever be out of style
again! After the expiry date, simply feed it to the dog or throw it in
the compost room; one smock from Umberto's Smockateria will heat
the house for a full ninety minutes! And who wants to use of all their
leisure allotment searching for the right smock? Buying a new smock
at Umberto's Smockateria is as quick 'n' easy as pie. At Umberto's
Smockateria, we always have your size because we know exactly
what you want. Just come on in to The Mall to any of the 107 stalls of
Umberto's Smockateria open seven days a week, 24 hours a day, and
step into the cool and relaxing U-Booth™. Two minutes later you're
the proud owner of a crisp new smock, made especially for you. No
fuss, no muss, no lineups, no waiting around for alterations. No
shrinkage, no unsightly hanging threads. And all this week, bring the
kids in for a FREE poster of Umberto, Founder and King of Umberto's
Smockateria, with Mr. Happy Smock™!
B: What's your future plans?
P: Well, my ultimate dream is to be Umberto's Work-Star of Ihc Year!
Of course I'll have to work really hard for that honour but it's worth
it. Just thinking about so many people comfortably and stylishly
wearing Umberto's Fast 'n' Fresh Fashion™ from Umberto's Smockateria makes me all bubbly inside. And then I'd get to be on the U-
Hour on Discorder Channel™, hosted by the Founder and King of
Umberto's Smockateria, Umberto himself!
B: Anything you'd like to close with?
P: You know what Umberto, Founder and King of Umberto's
Smockateria, always says, Smocks To The People!
Umberto's Smockateria, Home of Fast 'n' Fresh F.ishion™. One
hundred and seven stalls throughout The Pacific Seasons™ Mall to
serve you 24 hours a day, seven days a week. They know exactly
what you want. This week, the fine folks at PolyGrabb™ have
come out with a numbr of new releases for eager
consumers to slap into the digital tape decks. As
a bonus, PolyGrabb's sales reps have announced
a new lease/buying plan for DAT's that should
enable the average labourer to purchase these
products directly from the distributor, eliminating
the markup added on by retailers. PolyGrabb™
expects these tapes to go for as little as $45 per.
MenUts (Blessed Rocks) : Mentals are a
push band from Australia and are worth
checking out. The lead singer strangles
himself while standing in flames and
reciting some really weird concrete poetry... the effect Is to slab. The sound is
stock thrashcore-buzzsaw- brainbash and
the drummer Is possessed by friendly
demons. Good lyrics, good tunes. (Core-
sounds)
Cofflnage (Cofflnage): Truly tunes complimented by many psychotronic f\x.
These people (2 mars, 2 fern) have
found the key to better living through
electronic mutation and In this tape
they share their secret. 'I wanna blow
a baptist', 'bundy does the cross, 'no
hope, no hate, no harm', 'do your
beast'. This band rules the entire
world and is collectively giving bir
a new style of music. I hear in
band a soft and fast Jazzcore groove _
w/edits from the earth that bring form to spirit. N
involved with this band. Do not pass, go and buy this tape. (XRI)
Kenny Kingston's Creationist Chorus : No shit. I picked this up fo $ .99 at the
Goodwill tape department (many deals). After listening to it twice I have decided that Kenny is not a bad guy, just seriously misguided. The tape was cut
In Florida so try and imagine the musicianship. The whole thing sounds sort
of like the Sunshine Band meets Jerry Lee's cousin in a barflght. Cuts include
•What A Friend We Have In Jesus'. '(Don't care what they say) Monkeys Ain't
d 'Walk On The Mild Side'. (Phras
Jamaican Juices (Vol. 2): My current favourite Reggae cd was recorded and
compiled in 1993 by some people In a living room with a Fastext 8, so the
sound is not *on u* but the tunes make up for it. Mercury Mark is the singer,
an oldtimer from the punk days who Is still kicken out the Jams. The only
song he wrote on the tape (Don't Give Tight) is powerful, positive, and redemptive to the ninth degree. As well, the wizard Winston Walker (who is,
I believe, the living room's owner) gets into a one hour magickal groove
that includes scratch and loop sounds mixed into backing tracks. Throughout the tune the rhythm tracks rule as Walker samples various classic
vocal reggae cuts for the drum sounds and then brings it all together In a
base blend melody. As with most compilations there are the usual stiffs
mixed in with some Witchin Reggae.  (Spliff)
The Reverend Rock : This greatest hit mini-cd qualifies as a major
score for the collector. RevRock has been telling it like it is for many years
and this release is worthy of everyone involved. 'Cold Wind Above, Warm
Wind Below' Is one ofthe best love songs ever written; the '86 version was
itself a class nugget. So recently ('97) Rock walks into an LA. studio and
hires the best In the biz to put out this Jackedupremlxversion. (WEA)
hyperkitchen...with Viola Funk - brought to you by Cudd™chu-snax
HOT NEWS on the MSG front: Health Authorities (HA) are planning a full-scale crackdown on all the seedy little dens of infamy
in Chinatown that you and I know and love. Any location under suspicion will be subject to a thorough ransacking, and anyone
on the premises, to prosecution under good ol' Bill X-33. Tom, a 22-year-old dealing out of a shabby room in a downtown
eastside hotel, says he fears the impending clampdown because it will not only throttle a lot of his suppliers, but also "Well,
ya know. I'm gonna have like hordes of desperate glutos beating a path to my door. I mean, I'm happy with things the way they
are now; coupla customers a night keeps me in Twinkies™ for the rest of the week eh, but fuck. You know how these junkies
get...Anything for a fix eh..."Truth is, some disquieting parallels might be drawn from today's scene to that of 10 years ago when
the crack-crazy were becoming brazen enoug h to assault passersby in broad day lig ht in desperate bids for cash. An' what does
all that stuff do now that you can buy it as easily as a bottle of Benylin™-DM? Sit in London Drugs™ and gather dust. If ya
ask me they may as well deregulate MSG and rid themselves (and me) of their worries. Anyway, be careful out there, shit will
go down.
A MARTYR TO THE CAUSE... A 47-year-old woman was blasted to death in her Langley kitchen yesterday after a random
HA housecheck found her baking genuine chocolate brownies. "Mom said we were out of carob chips so she couldn't make
us brownies after all, but then in the cupboard above the fridge she found an old Eat-More™ and melted it down for the recipe,"
said a subdued 11-year-old who witnessed the incident. "It was harsh; they vaporised everything - Mom, the brownies, even
the bowl I was about to lick. What a waste." The surviving family members were packing for an HA-imposed 4-week stint at
the Healthcamp in Matsqui when interviewed. The Eat-More™ wrapper was salvaged from the debris and has been taken to
forensic labs for age determination.
AMID ALL THE HULLABALOO about the newest Joe's® opening on West 4th, now might be the time to remind you that the
original location up on the Commercial Throughway does indeed still exist. It's worth fighting your way through the fly-buzzing
ghettoes of the East Side just for a tall comforting glass of Mocha - even if you do get nabbed and hafta pay the hefty toll exacted
by the Asian youth conglomerate manning the Stamps Place overpass. Adds a bit of excitement to one's afternoon anyway.
THE NEWEST CONTENDER in the chocofake bar sweepstakes, SNAK-UMS™, boasts "the lowest Tofood content of any
bar on the market" but your independent taster still found it pretty pale in comparison to the chocolate extravagances of days
of yore. On the other hand, the 55g price, only $5.14 even after Federal taxes, is sure to be a big drawing card. But that hokey
ad endorsement by Prime Minister Atwood is just going a bit too far, in my opinion.
ONE LAST BULLETIN... True Confections' most recent known whereabouts, in the basement of a citihome at 1117 Bute,
is now defunct. You wanna avoid that address as it's crawling with HA surveillance. HYPERKITCHEN will keep you posted
when next we obtain word of its locale.
Viola Funk
[Ed.'s note: Oh no it won't That is, we regret to announce that this is the last HYPERKITCHEN that will ever appear in D-Magazine. The Health
Authorities have made allegations that, in light of HYPERKITCHEN's "subversive, non-weight-conscious content" it would "be in the best
interests of all concerned were publishing thereof to cease forthwith." In addition, for some time now D-Mag has been receiving lengthy petitions
from adherents of Church for the Fit-for-Life, one of the most powerful lobbying bodies in the nation, against the running of HYPERKITCHEN
and financial sanctions against the publishers are being threatened of late. It is with a sense of loss (and not a little curiosity as to where
she'll manage to find the funds for that MSG habit of hers) that we bid columnist Funk goodbye after almost 11 years of hack work for us.]
"I was hungry...on the go...had no time to stop for eats. Luckily, I had eaten a
Cudd™ Chu-snax bar earlier that day. With a simple flex of the esophagal
sphincter, I had a delicious four course meal to last me the rest of the driver
DffffFchu
The Music of Three Machines (Collective
Heartbeat) : Crunchbeat from Northern
Europe. These three (jazzcore) magicians
kick musical ass. The drum attack (giga-
beat fast) and the Joe Pass Influenced
bass tracks meld towards myth and the
singer's sense responses are well documented. The grunts, moans, squeals,
yelps, and whispers she offers to replace
the usual guitar sound (that Is never
missed) represent a powerful force in the
annals of modem music... First album.
(Spiral Sounds)	
Jorls Badanov's Fedora: (Greatest Hits) This local group has been taking big
steps in the bigtlme since the release of their third album "Natasha Nose".
We all know the story by now, led by songwriter Bob Baldeson the legendary
five piece ensemble combined soulful politics with slashing guitars and as
other quirky west coast musicians united behind these tunes, a new sound
was born. This greatest hits package reflects the legend well though they
might have Included "Livin and dyin In Gastown" or "Safe Animals", but
generally the stuff here is choice-choice. Cuts from "Raven on his Wing",
"Vacation In Llmboland", "Mr. Blotto and the Anti-Zine" and "Terminal City"
are included. Though none of the usual radio fodder has been omitted the
band has taken the time to select some of the more obscure tracks that they
are happy with. (Sub-Pop/Virgin)
PolyGrabb™. Mentats, Coresounds™, Phrase™, Coffinage, XRI™, Spliff™,
WEA™, Spiral Sounds™, Boris Badanov's Fedora, BBF, SubPop™, and
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of course, it's best not to use them at all, but In this
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Don't you feel nervous just about now? that. What a poorman." Or
when I see a woman running around with hardly any
clothes on. And guys go,
"Wow wow." I just go,
"Poor her and poor them.
That's not what life is
about." But it is about that
But these are situations
that you like to deal with.
I like to deal with that because I like to point out to
people that they've gone a
little away from their nature. That they don't have
any respect anymore for
each other, and they just
see each other as bodies
that they can do with whatever they want. And I think
that they should think of
each other as whole people
with minds. And think
about the mental aspects of
humanity and not just the
physical ones. Not just the
immediate gratification, but
the long-term picture. I
guess the religious things I
bring into my music are because I really believe in that
stuff. I don't believe in the
bible literally, and I believe
il's been rewritten by a lot
of people in power...
WJMTA
all thumbs. I believe that
the world is not perfect at
all. And I think that to pretend lhat to have quick sex
tiful makes you perfect is
nota very, uh.natural path...
So, do you see what I'm
phot): Ly__ SchynMMky
ion't think Vm morbid or pessimis-
that have been applied to me.
people who are happy, and living in a material world and not having to deal with the
materialism as much as other people who are
enslaved by it. I don't perceive not having
money as negative at all. I perceive it as a
very normal, positive way of life and everyone I know lives that way. I know very few
people who have more than a minimum
amount of money to get by, including myself.
Bul you prefer to convey your point using
melancholy symbols and scenes, is il another misconception lhal this a reflection of
a sad woman?
If you ask one of these guys in my tour how
sad I am, I don't think you would gel much
of a response. I mean we have to deal with
reality here, and the things that move people
the most. I know in this day and age it seems
like people are mostly responding to stimuli
like sex. Sexism is real popular right now.
Sex and materialism are the two big things
right now in art, and in television, and in
movies, all kinds of stuff, you know? And
commercialism like movies wilh Coca Cola
themes because it's Columbia Pictures or       Your voice is si
whatever. welL
I find inspiration and - maybe this is       Oh thanks!
negative - in situations lhal make me feel
somelhing. And if a guy walks by wilh no       Very  smooth
shin on, my tongue docs not hang out. I just       thanked your ti
think, "Oh, that poor man. He's been so be-       nett, several tit,
littled by society he thinks lhat he has to do       Yeah, since 19!
Yeah. Absolutely. Moving
away from that... the country honk influences that
were always evident with
X were never fully realized
until X's alter-ego, The
Knitters, released "Poor Utile Critter on
theRoad."These influences are very strong
on the new record. A t the same time, your
old rougher edges only show occasionally.
Was it a conscious effort to steer away from
rock & roll toward various country, blues,
and jazz styles?
Sure it was. Yeah. I don't see any reason to
do something separate from X and then to do
what I did in X. Plus, I think when you get a
little bit older you wanl lo do stuff... or no,
maybe it's not just older. Maybe il's just lhat,
you know, I wanted to be able to sing words
without having lo yell at the top of my lungs.
And have people understand the words and
have the words be more of a focal point. And
thatkind of music suits that more. Plus Tony
and I bolh like thai kind of music. The musicians I play wilh on the record can play any
kind of music in the world. It was so neat to
be able to say: "Can you do a country song?"
"Sure." You know, and they could do il.
The jazz stuff on the record is great.
Oh God. Yeah. They 're so good. Gocxl band.
Your voice is sounding great Ihese /lays us
me, "Aren't you ashamed to say you take
voice lessons?" But no more lhan a dancer,
or a guitar player, or a drummer. Most people
do take some kind of training. Like a visual
artist will sit there with a nude model and
will draw her, and then the same day will
draw pictures of her own hand. That's all
voice lessons are. It's just figuring out what
your instrument is and how to use it.
"Famous Barmaid" and "Gravel" are the
only spoken word tracks on the album.
You've done a lot of non-musical writing in
the past. Will you do more things like the
"Twin Sisters" L.P. with Wanda Coleman,
or your poetry published with Lydia Lunch ?
Well, I think that now that I'm on my own
hke this I don't have to worry about separating the poetry from the records. I mean if I
wanted to do one whole side on my next
Rhino record, I could. I have a book that I sell
now that I made myself, that I pasted up and
drew all the pictures for. It's nicely made.
Are you doing anything in the way of visual
arts? Painting...
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. I love to do that.
Well, the woman who made it, Beth B., I've
known her for a long long time. And Jerome,
the man in the movie, that's my husband,
Viggo. It was kind of an inept editing job.
Are there any more acting plans for the
Both John and I really would love to do
acting, but it's really impossible to get work.
You had a friendly relationship with El-
ektra Records over the years...
Yeah, pretty good.
"Old Wives' Tales" was released on the
much smaller Rhino label. How did this
come to pass?
Well, how it came to pass was when John
wanted to do a solo record, he didn't have to
make a demo tape and there was a bidding
war over him with all the majors. When I
wanted to do a record, no one would even
Usten to my demo or come see me play.
Are you happier on Rhino than you were on
teU you, for doing
nd well trained. You've
iging teacher, Gloria llen-
i's on past albums...
people say lo
I've heard you are a bit of t
may be wrong-
But you have done some in the past?
(holds out her tattooed hands) Just myself.
You didn't do Spider in New York?
I did Spider. But Spider is
asks people that he does tattoos for, if he;
likes them or whatever, to tattoo on b
He's got thousands of tattoos. I don't c
remember what I did. It was a long lime
and I was pretty drunk at that point, so I -
remember. But something really
think I signed my
like that.
But you consider it a viable art fa
Oh yes, definitely.
What's your philosophy on
have one at all.
My tattoos are wonderful ihingjVmark
moment in your life thai you'■■ways be
able to remember. And that's dHiav I look
at mine as much as I look at irjgfds a visual
presentation of whatever
They have a definite sigr
then?
I think they do in the same JK that ihey have
significance to tribal cull
thing, in my opinion.
Do you use any tribal.
No, I mean, some of them
so that's kind of tribal, but
Polynesian tattoos or anything,
What does the tattoo on your right shoulder
actually represent?
The star and ihe circle and the...
/ always thought it was comic book swearing.
(smiles and laughs) Yeah. It's a cuss. That's
exactly what it is. Comic book swearing.
My girlfriend thinks your question mark is
about Ihe coolest tattoo she's ever seen.
(laughs again) Oh really? Yeah, it was a
biker place in Providence, Rhode Island and
the bottom of the thing touches ihe question
mark almost il's, like, sooo badly done. I'm
surprised she likes it. Bul again, I remember
the time and place, the people I was with,
what il was like, you know, what the night
was like - rainy.
A few years ago you played a housewife
turned televangelistin the film "Salvation!".
How did you gel involved in that project?
Danish and I've only heard a couple of
songs, and I like them .
So you don't think that new music in North
America is dead?
No, I don't think so, but I think there's a lot
of bands trying to imitate each other now. A
lot of new bands start to sound a lot like the
Replacements. That's like, really funny to
me, you know?
In that vein, acts like T-Rex, Alice Cooper,
and Kiss seem to have become major influences on a new breed of bands who are
equally interested in bands like X, Gun
Club, and other "punkpioneers". What do
you think of an underground scene, that regards you personally as one of its patron
saints, also embracing the glam rock ofthe
1970s?
(long pause) And embracing the glam rock?
Yeah.
I think that when you're young and you're an
artist and you're trying to come up with
: thing that's original I think you're going
to be combining your own original vision
wilh things that have gone on before. And I
think that's great.
any problem with...
I don't nav$HHRoblem with anything anybody's doinmnp glad we've done something lhat \fl_fpcdcd at the lime when we
Right. BJtttmt was an obvious contrast to
slujf UkSBe Cooper.
Right, i
two have fused.
that's been happening all the
1, you know that's ihc wonderful
having stuff before you to work
ing something lo go back into, you
going lo come along wilh a brilliant
ndlhcncvcryonc's going togo,"What '
idea. 1 can start wilh lhat and go
:whcrc else." Bul very lew people have
iplctcly iheir own ideas. I always try to
:p myiclf wilh my own ideas 'cause I
resting. Bul, you
i sure lhal things creep into my
Certainly not Alice Cooper, but
•ho knows! (laughs).
il the best
) Oh, 1 don't agree wilh lhat at
all. 1 don'l believe
fonn of flaltery.
lhal the lowest thing you can do
What new music are you listening to these
Well, I listened lo Kale Bush's new record,
half of il. Because I'd never heard her before.
And I liked it. I wasn't blown away by the
words. Bul I did like the way it sounded and
her voice and stuff. I listened lo Maria
McKcc's record, Syd Straw's record, k.d.
lang's record. A lot of women. And as far as
bands go, the Oyster Band who's on lour
with us, I like them a lol. They're nice guys.
And, God I can't think of everything else...
Billy Bragg I really like. I like the Chili
Peppers a lot. And I like ihc Replacements a
lot. Bul if you're talking aboul brand new
music lhat's jusl like, brand new, I'm nol
very up on lhal.
re doing a disservice lo that pcr-
disscrvicc lo future people who
;>ur work and be deceived by it.
; that is a low, low blow. Never do
tfluence from your
if 1 found myself
milai in;; a vocal or consciously
thing Ifial sounds like someone
our faull lhal every commercial rock station
sounds ihc same. Thai ihe accepted fashions
are accepted everywhere al once, 'lhat the
H.C. "Thought
" 1989
JANUARY 1990 13 Things What Died And Lived
In The '80'S
Frozen yogurt... fresh pasta... oat
bran as Messiah... fuck all that
shit. If ya want the real lowdown
on the major food events of the
decade just past, read on.
On the chocolate bar front,
a vapid wasteland of look-like,
soundalike, taste-alike bars glutted the shelves. Wunderbar,
SKOR, Mr. Big, Special Crisp,
Gold, Temptation; all obviously
the spawn of some American an
marketing conglomerate packaging the '80's standout theme,
mediocrity. And hey, like, whatever happened to Wig-Wags -
remember? - those long chocolate-covered caramel braids that
left you gloriously stuck-up? And
Laura Secord bars, the real ones,
that came in Buttcrmallow and
all those other '70's flavours?
Now all you can get arc those
"Laura Secord French Mint"
bastardisations. And - TREASURES - possibly the funkiest,
most '70's chocolate bar of all?
With all those groovily-shaped
little break-apartablepieccs each
with an exotic concoction inside... Turkish delight, or a nut,
or fudgey chocolate mush? Like,
how do these scum-sucking corporate traitors manage to just pull
these things from the market
without a public hue and cry.
Subtly, I guess. Banking on the
catatonia of the general populace. One day you walk into the
comer store and suddenly realise, "Hey, I haven't seen Blah-
Blahs in ages -What's thedeal?!"
The deal is, they're gone, the
way of the dodo, ex-fucking-
tinct. (I've gotta stop swearing
so much, my mom's startedread-
ing this column...) So you leave
the store clutching a Twix, the
least barfworthy of the new
chocolate bar crew. Come 2000
they'll probably have vanished
too. Ya gotta watch these things.
Speaking of corner stores,
they too were afflicted by that
scourge of the '80's - uniformity; countless chain outlets
scrubbed clean to the point of
sterility (I dunno about you, but
to me, if it doesn't grow mold
specimens, it'snotacomerstore)
and updated into mini-Safeways,
cropping up everywhere. Mac's
Milk dropping the "Milk" to become justplain"Mac's".Atevcry
turn, interchangeable cement-
brick food abodes with same-
length aisles, level floors, swanky
wall-uni|jcfrigerationcascs, and
strictly oblong interiors. Yikcs!
And 24-hour joints, ubiquitous
as well. To the point where there's
this place on Fraser St called
Round ihc Clock Food Store
that's only open normal daytime
hours. Everyone's trying to cash
in on the trend.
2-for-l pizza. Ah yes; another brainchild of the decade of
consumerism run rampant. A perfect mirror of the greed mindset
inherent in the '80's. Things will
never be the same again because
now when you go to order pizza
from a normal place, the prices -
considering "it's not 2-for-l" -
seem astronomical. I guess it's
only a matter of time before some
joker comes along with "2 1/2-
for-1" in a bid to outdo the competition. The funniest thing about
itis,"2-for-l"ain'tevcnthctruth,
inasmuch as you get adiscount if
you only order a single pizza.
Bogus.
t all  v
I quite
bleak in the '80's junk food
world. The big DQ came onto
the scene with lhat happenin' invention, the Blizzard. In three
sizes, starting at $1.89, and a
boggling array of flavours, each
unhealthicr than the prcv ious one.
And in the Blizzard arena, the
afore-maligned SKOR really
ROKS. General, informed opinion has it that SKOR Blizzards
arc the best. This is the drawback
of living where I do now; the
Hastings Dairy Queen doesn't
put a sprinkling of the relevant
chocolate bar on top of the Bliz
zard like my old one back home
in Surrey did. However, it definitely has a lot more atmosphere.
More on that another time.
Other dismal happenings of
the '80's.
The decline of A&W. I remember watching in horror as
that dreadful pastel MuchMusic
nightmare, the first of the malevolent new A&W breed,
opened in the bowels of Pacific
Centre shortly after the inception of SkyTrain. (There must be
a tie-in there; Grace McCarthy's
probably the biggest shareholder
of A&W now...) For those among
the readership too young or mall-
oriented to remember, A&W
used to be a fine, proudly brown-
and-orange chain of drive-ins
purveying milkshakes, onion
rings, and "Platters" (burgs with
fries) that came in funky wicker
baskets. Now they serve salads.
SALADS! I ask you. Has this
crazy health trip gone too far or
what? The latest victim of the
anli-drive-in   clampdown   has
been the old A&W at 33rd &
Fraser which, let it be recalled, I
recommended several food columns ago, "Should be a designated heritage site". Now it
stands, dusty, dark and deserted,
its long sheltered walkway jutting out redundantly between the
two empty rows of parking
spaces. And worst of all, when
you're at the cemetery and you
have to take a piss, there's no
place to go anymore. RIP, A&W
drive-ins.
An' another thing, another
chain subjected to this massive
refurbishment scam. White Spot.
A BC institution, goddammit,
every last outlet now resembling
an upscale McDonald's. In the
old days every White Spot had
its own personality, so that while
you could count on the burger
tasting basically the sameno matter where you ordered it, some
were tiny unassuming greasy-
spoon places (25 th & Cambie)
whereas others went the whole
hog and were quite ritzy (102nd
& King George in Surrey). With
the beginning of the '80's however, change began to creep insidiously throughout the White
Spots. Goodbye to the orange
vinyl stools; hello mass quantities of pseudo-secondhand/ antique store trappings splayed everywhere indiscriminately. A
bourgeois interior decorator's
dream. But what I really miss are
those groovy placemats that
showed an artist's rendering of
Vancouver in the 1920's; fir trees
and flappers and Model-T's
against a backdrop of inlet and
mountains. Gone, gone, forever
gone. The death knell of old
White Spotdom was definitively
sounded with the destruction by
fire of the flagship location at
Granville and 70th. From Nat
Bailey to Peter Toigo; this is the
way the world ends...
Okay, what else bad happened in the '80's foodwise? Oh
yeah, Molly's! Molly's died just
as it was beginning to scale the
zenith of popularity - which is
probably just as well, I guess.
For the uninitiated, Molly' s Spice
Shop up on Commercial 2 blocks
north of 1st laid claim to having
the "best cinnamon buns in Vancouver". I tended to second this
motion. Not only cinnamon buns
par excellence, but also great pop-
pyseed-and-raisin buns and yum-
miferous muffins. Plus you could
buy the little 10-packs of Twin-
ings teas for only $.99, 20 cents
cheaper than at Safeway. A totally cool hangout - well, quite
hot on summer days, but - everyone from the neighb' congegrated
thereof a Saturday morning, had
amicable chats (nothing heavy
or political, just personal stuff),
drank coffee and ate cinnamon
buns dripping with cream-cheese
icing, all to a backdrop of Israeli
folk music. Then the owners had
to up and move to Europe, and
ker-angg!, the door slammed shut
on another eatworthy institution.
So, let's recap. The major
trendof the '80'sinfood, as in all
else, was consumerism to the nth
degree. Corner stores became
miniature supermarkets; supermarkets became colossal warehouse-like acreages; simple unpretentious restaurant chains
were trans formed inlo overdone
designer showcases for the
Tuuded-out Yupstermasses. And
all in the name of you, The Consumer. Nothing was sacred save
the almighty mammon.
The outlook for the '90's is
not heartening. Doubtless the
eatery scene will become even
more homogeneous; by 2000
there'll probably be no way of
telling a White Spot from a
McDonald's - or for that matter,
A&W or Red Robin - short of
walking back outside and looking at the sign. Class divisions
and standards of living between
v arious urban locales - East Side,
West Side - will become even
more sharply delineated due to
transport-lacking, low-income or
Welfare individuals being unable to take advantage of decent
food prices in the suburban meg-
acomplexcs while the upper-class
nonchalantly hand over greenbacks at tlie pink Safeway. And
in the suburbs, where they seem
to be the hardest-hit, the Mom-
and-Pop clapboard-siding corner
stores will beutterly extinguished
from view, a few representatives
clinging tenaciously to life only
in the cities and rural areas.
Neighbourhood soup-and-san or
cinnamon-bun outlets will still
be extant but with a higher and
higher percentage of them swallowed up by franchises.
But hey. As long as there
arc still straw-wrappers being
shot at each other over Pirate
Paks by conniving siblings - as
long as Psycho-Woman still
mutters her way up and down the
aisles of Pacific Cafe - as long as
you can still walk up to Howard's at Salsbury & Frances and
buy a foil-wrapped King Don
("Con Dom", as I affectionately
call 'em) - there's hope.
Modern Literature • Art • Canadiana • History • Natural History
BOOKS
455 WEST PENDER STREET
VANCOUVER, B.C., CANADA
V6B1V2     •     (604)681-7654
SALE
BOXING   DAY   TO   NEW
YEAR'S   EVE:20%   OFF
EVERYTHING
14 DISCORDER t.«What
|5es around."
And you know what? It's true.
In the world of fashion, trends
come and go every day. But
lately the new trend is old
trends turned trendy again,
can tell you because I' m i
a chemist but in the tie d;
ness you' ve got to rememl
dyes are chemicals and dying
chemistry.
How did you decide to get into
the tie dye business?
he's figured it-out.
Who's wearing tie dye these
days?
There's  a  whole new -.yottfig
gerteraHwh of hippies nut there.
Why are people being drawn
to tie dye again?
Simply because it's been 20 or
25 years... Most of the people
whose money we want are too
young to remember that it
tie dye. The same is true
except I .do have jj
coming in saying,' "1 w
it Che la
it cimk- arou
it this'tf
pick up on it immediat
without exception... this has
something to do with the soul in
tie dye
ling" new,
Do you think it's gonna last
forever?
I don't believe it's a fad like the
fluorescent colours that were
around last year. That sort of
thing is obviouslyi
can't explain it that's the c;
It's not a fad like splashes on
shirts, it's got a lot more soul.
How come?
_. i couldn'
tell you.
But it started in the sixties.
If not before. I haven't done any
research, have you?
|y*pu'd be the expert!
11 do now. This is contemporary tie dye. Some of the
things developed in the 60s in
one sense are limited because
we've developed new styles since
What about these
they have names?
Yes, there are swirls, there
diamonds, arrowheads, wings,
swirls with spokes, swirls with
spiders, bursts, clouds; kind of
like that.
How long does it take to make
a shirt?
About 3 days.
How many colours co-
How long does it take you to
develop a new design?
Sometimes it works the first time,
s perfected in my
d I think and I look
at other shirts that guide me...
^ater I open it up and see what I
it's the most enjoyable
e job: making them is
you get to do mat 30 times
that's really fun. Unless you
have no taste in colour, there's
no such thing as a bad shirt because ihey're all different and all
There  is  one  thai I
• <-.   ■:'!><,:
lysattsfac-■'
pattern but I know
that one of my counterparts does
beautiful stars so that's
ing they were
ra, ha.
hippies i||
it's a splash of colour is a way of
saying I'm different in the drab
world of concrete which is gray,
"Don't
Be Straight". That's why you
won't ever find a straight line in
l)<>you consider yourseira hip-
No. T« go along with having the
store I should be living in the
back and have a big dog and
drive either no car or a
Volkswagon van...
How old were you when you
g«t your first tie dyed shirt?
to il?
Well I'd rather not get into that.
Why, too private?
Well,   we   gotta   keep   some
things—
i how little do 1
cliother across the      know about you?... I si
street... It meant something; it      I'm not gonna hate the press af-
hadn't become fashion. You had      ter this.
liar kind of freak to      Ha, ha, ha. e there are a lot of Van-
s who will remember
1989 as the year the Who and
Rolling Stones played BC Place,
but even though commercial
radio would have us think that
those were the best concerts of
the year (with REM at the Coliseum being quite a bit lower on
the list, I suppose), the greatest
out-of-town bands I saw were in
the clubs.
The Ramones gig at 86
Street in Iune was the most
shameful example of 86 Street's
apparent policy of violence
against concert-goers, but since
the Ramones come here so rarely
(the previous time, I think, was
1984), wc were all just stuck
with going there. (If only it were
practical to have them play every
night for an entire year at the
Railway instead, as someone
suggested....) Also at 86 Street,
Voice of the Beehive was surprisingly powerful opening for
That Petrol Emotion in March,
and the Hoodoo Gurus played
two nights this fall (not a
liantly as when they were here
some years ago, but no-one I
knew got into fights with the
nasty junior yuppie audience
members this time).
As for the Commodore
Ballroom, which hasn't encouraged ovcrzealous security methods in quite some lime, it hosted
Jane's Addiction (who got
mixed reviews, but I actually
enjoyed) and the Pixies with Bob
Mould, which must have been
the best show I saw all year. It
was a pleasant surprise to see
that there were enough people in
Vancouver who had even heard
ofthe Pixies to sell theplacc out,
but it was more of a shock to hear
the audience actually singing
along wilh the band. How refreshing, and also a nice reminder
that the Commodore has the best
floor in Vancouver for jumping
up and down on.
On a smaller scale, Penelope Houston (formerly of the
legendary Avengers) played at
tlie Town Pump for an audience
that must have been at least half
made up of local punk rock pioneers. Unforlunately, though,
anyone hoping lo see signs ofthe
tecn-aged Penelope was certainly
disappointed. NRI5Q, (who, as
far as sustaining an incredible
amount of energy- and credibility- over an incredible number
of years, put the Stones to shame)
did much better at the Pump late
But in spite of the really
good shows I did sec this year,
I'm convinced the best tour of
'89 was one lhat didn't come any
closer to us than San Francisco.
That's right, the immortal
Buzzcocks.
As far as local bands go, our
two best (shall we say) fuck
combos, the Groovaholics and
JANUARY 1990
December 31
The Death of 1989 with CURIOUS GEORGE and
friends
January 5 + 6
THE SWAGMEN with guests
% January 12 + 13
BRUCE A. AND THE SECULAR ATAVISTS with
guests THE SMUGGLERS
January 19 + 20
1 |>Ay4A*fcAwith guests EXCITED FIRST
$ UW    I rr     DAUGHTER
January 26 + 27
LAST WILD SONS with guests
February 1 + 2
The LAST ARTS CLUB SHOW EVER!! Multi-band
blowout!
ARTS CLUB LOUNGE 1181 SEYMOUR 683-1051
DOORS OPEN 9:30 FRI., 10:30 SAT.
 SORRY, NO MINORS	
Tartan Haggis, made enough
appearances to keep most alter-
nalivc-lype pariy-gocrs happy.
Ncw-ish and perhaps more serious bands on tlie scene included
two made up of Enigmas members, Earthling and TT Racer
(who have been gelling a lot of
press lately). The Wardells
moved here from Victoria, and
joined Picasso Set as one of
Vancouver's very few real pop
bands. She gathered up a big
following with their harder sound
(shocking a lot of people, especially, I would imagine, when
they played at Matsqui Prison,
because they're all women) before losing their singer in the
summer, and they're still looking for a replacement. Also getting more popular in the clubs
were Bruce A and the Secular
Atavists, Glee, Dirt, and the
Hard Rock Miners, to name a
few, while FYF (Five Year Fuck,
formerly Five Year Plan) made a
comeback. Another comeback of
sorts was the return of four of the
five members of Slow (guitarist
Ziggy never really left- these
days he's getting famous with
the Scramblers)- Tom and
Christian with ©, and Hamm and
Terry with Tankhog. One of this
year's great disappointments was
that both bands kept a pretty low
profile. Two of the other great
disappointments were that we're
still waiting to see records from
the Scramblers and ©. Maybe
the 90s will bring them both good
luck.... We did get to hear new
releases from Curious George
and semi-locals the Young Fresh
Fellows and 64 Funny Cars,
though.
Looking back at 1989, and
this whole decade, in Vancouver
music, it's pretty easy to be
negative. Ten years ago, if Dis
corder had been around, v
probably have been writing our
year-end columns about how
punk rock (or new wave?) was
going to change the world. For
the better, of course. But, at least
partly because the so-called local scene is so fragmented, it's
hard to find a band wagon to jump
on in December 1989.
So what can we look forward to in the next decade here in
Vancouver? The way things arc
going now, probably not a lot
right away. Musicians and fans
are complaining about there not
being enough venues for new
bands, and at the same time that
there are too many bands for
anyone to be able to keep them
all straight (wc may well end up
remembering '89 as the year of
the 3-band showcase). Still,
enough bands like tlie Grapes of
Wrath, 54-40, Art Bergmann,
and the Sons of Freedom, are
getting well known to keep
musicians sending out those
demo tapes, so at least there's no
end in sight for Local Motion.
CAMOSUN SOUND
8 TRACK RECORDING FACILITY
GREAT GEAR !! GREAT RATES!!
$10/hr. ($7/hr. for students)
CALL 879 - 6345
in your face!! Koko Taylor
Commodore
Sunday, November 19th
If there was any doubt as to
who is the Queen of the Blues,
The Chicago Blues Machine did
all they could to eliminate it.
Koko Taylor's five man band
introduced her as the Queen and
referred to her as such throughout the gig. Appearing on stage
in a sparkling white dress, and
thereby sending the crowd into a
frenzy, Koko started the show
with the ever popular "Let The
Good Times Roll", which set the
appropriate mood for the evening.
Most of the people on the
dance floor at the time remained
there for the rest of thenight. Her
best number was undoubtedly
"I'm A Woman", the lyrics of
which glorify female blues singers and necessitate a 'deep blue-
voice' which only Koko Taylor
can deliver (scream); 'deepdown
in the basement blues' is how
Koko described it. Other greats
from the gig included "Come
Home To Mama", "I'd Rather
GoBlind", and "Hey Bartender".
The Chicago Blues Machine provided a strong, energetic backup, and possess a very
talented guitarist; but Koko
Taylor's vocal strength and stage
presence  still   dominated  the
The opening act, a seven
piece R&B group from Victoria
called The Toasters, played
almost as long as Koko and her
Blues Machine. When you're
waiting for the Queen of theBlues
to perform, that's too long.
Claude de Leseleuc
Innocent Fun
Cry Danger
Doughboys
Club Soda
Monday, November 20th
Never again will I quake in
my boots at mention of "Club
Soda's METAL MONDAYS".
More like "Newton Inn Revisited Night", m' afraid. The only
saving grace of this triple bill
was its disparity, and that didn't
become apparent till the end.
I arrived much too close to
the beginning of the first band's
set and endured it standing in a
corner amongst major git tonnage, much of it provided by a
bouncer who stood right in front
of me. No loss; 'cept it would've
been even better if he'd also been
obliterating sound waves. Unfortunately, these found tlieir
boring and unimaginative way
through a sea of feathered hair,
around his beefy form, and into
my ears. Innocent Fun certainly
do justice to thefirsthalf of their
name, inasmuch as their material was hackneyed, uninspired
AOR. Worse still, their lead
singer was somehow reminiscent
of a hackneyed, uninspired AOR
version of Paul McKenzie... a
truly scary incarnation if ever
there was. But "Fun"? Well, on
that score I quote this great fat git
man who was standing next to
me. When he made a disparaging comment about the band and
none of his drinking buddies
rushed to concur, he added in-
AMP W£a£M5T£> ^SP^S W
credulously, "Come on, why's
everyone looking at me like they
know something I don't?"I didn't
know it either, whatever it was.
After a lengthy interval the
next band came on. "Cry
Danger.and let slip the leather
pants..." as a famous playwright
lias it. Yep, these dudes had the
posing down pat alright. Regulation long hair, black leather,
cowboy  boots,   and  blistering
shoulder-to-shoulder guitar
duets. From a three guitar, one
drummer outfit obviously lusting after a cover spread in Metal
Bop! magazine. An interesting
leopardskin-clad chick looking
like a refugee from tlie early '70s
made use of the o ilicr wise empty
dancefloor for a while; then,
losing interest, strolled away
toward the bar at which point
Mr. Lead Singer rather pathetically called after her "No, don't
quit dancing!" Jeez, good groupies are hard to find. Anyway,
these guys played the kinda stuff
it's impossible not to tap a foot to
just for heck. Or maybe it only
seemed that way in light of the
even more stunning mediocrity
that had gone before. Whatever.
Fin ally, Montreal's Doughboys arrived to throw a wrench
into the proceedings. (Is that the
right malapropism?) And to
throw the moniker "S atan" liberally here and there throughout
their songage. What songage
though. While their use of die
devil-worship gimmickry was
forked-tongue-in-check, their
approach lo the music was all-
out, no-holds-barrcd MOLTEN
METAL MADNESS. The kinda
thang you expect from an event
billed as Metal Monday, dang it.
Plus, everyone knows that
dreaded hair is much cooler lhan
feathered. Whoops, scratch that
last bit: of course I was judging
the bands solely on their musical
merit. Of course. Anyway, heads
were banging and hair severely
trashing all over the capacity
dancefloor. These guys didn't
have to implore leopardskinned
women to stay and dance, no
sirree Bob. The text of their four-
man crusade was largely unintelligible to me; it seemed the
only word they enunciated on
was the aforementioned "Beelzebub", but the music kept me in
thrall as did the kooky grin that
seemed to appear on Lead S inger
Man's face without his bidding,
and the looming conspiratorial
stage presence of Bass-Player
Man. As a finale L.S.M. dragged
out one of those sad, balding
beer-gutted "metal animals",
ostensibly one of their crew, to
belt out aversion of "S weet Home
Alabama", here rendered as
"Sweet Home Hell". Hell, the
Doughboys can come mess up
my kitchen anytime. Hey, that's
a double pun!
Lest this rapier wit be inducing barfing in you, you may
be gratified lo learn thai on my
way oull was punched in ihe eye
by someone's overzealous arm
and subsequently left one contact lens, a lot of sobriety, and
several decibels of hearing
poorer.
Viola Funk ARE YOU SERIOUS? MUSIC 8AM-NOON
Schoenberg. Varese. Berio. Xenakis.
Schafer. Webern - Artistic Evel Knievels
oil. Nouveau post-modem instrumental
compositions in a classical vein with Paul
B.A. Steenhuisen and Ian Crutchley alternating weeks.
THE BRUNCH REPORT I2-12:15PM
News, sports, weather and more with the
CiTR News. Sports and Weather Departments.
THE ROCKERS SHOW 12:15-3:00PM
Reggae. Rock Steady and Ska with
George Barrett.
BtUES AND SOUl SHOW 3-5:00PM
lachlan Murray provides the best of
blues, rhythm and blues, funk and soul.
THE CiTR NEWS MAGAZINE 5-5.30PM
CiTRs   in-depth   current   affairs/news
magazine show. Coverage and analysis of the day's news and sports.daily
editorial commentary,  entertainment
reviews and reports on events here at
UBC. all in a comprehensive and comprehensible magazine package.  And
we promise, no traffic reports.
HEARSAY 5:30-6:00PM
Newshow! Readings by writers of prose
and the literary arts.  (Dis)organised by
Antje  Rauwerde.  Richard Vilus.  Barb
Elgood. and Katherine Vogt.  Il
interested in airing your I'
phone these three people at CiTR!
JUST LIKE WOMEN 6 8 OOPM
Feminist news and analysis and music
made by women for everybody. Alternates Sundays with...
ELECTRONIC SMOKE SIGNALS  4-8 OOPM
Information, news, interviews, political
analyis from the global cultures of resistance. Hosted by Horacio de la Cueva.
Alternates Sundays withjust Like Women.
RADIO FREE AMERICA  10PM-MIDNIGHT
Join host Dave Emory for some extraordinary political research guaranteed to
make you think twice.   Bring your tape
deck and two C-90's   Originally broadcast on KFJC (Los Attos.CA). Ihis month.
AIDS: Epidemic or Weapon of War?
INTHESRIPOFINCOHERENCY 1
So what if Barry dc
more? Whogivesa
still do.
THE WELKIN REPORT 7-7:30AM
Rebroadcast of Friday s broadcast.
THE MORNING SHOW 7:30-8:ISAM
From the famous siren to the not-so-f
mous BBC World Service, wake up w
The CiTR Morning St
sntertainr
SOUND OF REALITY 3-5:00PM
Experimental Radio, with Vision! Featuring environmental sounds, found noises,
information/propaganda and the world's
primitive and experimental musics from
the auditory fringe. Live! Contributions
welcome. Practitioner: Anthony Roberts.
THE CiTR NEWS MAGAZINE 5-5:30PM
y for d
-4:00AM
I? Gu«_oandTrini
I sports everywhere else fo
R.J. MOORHOUSE 6
ck. bigger and mouth
TOP OF THE BOPS 7:00-8:00PM
Trini Lopez. Ronnie Self, and The Phantom all love you.  Marc Coulevin brings
Rock n' Roll to its roots. Note the really
THE AFRICAN SHOW 8-9.30PM
Umerah is on sabbatical until February
THE JAZZ SHOW 9:30PM-12:30AM
Vancouver's longest running prime time
jazz program. None of that late night
graveyard/earlyweekendjazz. Features
at 11   Hosted by the ever-suave Gavin
25th, T si The Jazz Show will not be heard
on these days.   Nevertheless, have a
great holiday season!
8th Charles Mingus and Roy "Little Jazz"
Eldridge open our first show for the 90s.
and music to jolt you bock into exis
fence. 9-10: Women and men who d<
3rd Tom Waits Part One
10th Tom Waits Part Two
17th Billy Bragg
24th Kate Bush
OUR TALENTED FAMILY  10-11:00AM
Recordings of live performances at the
UBC Schoolof Music. TheComtemporary
Players. Student Composers. Guest Artists. Stage Band, World Music..and oth-
MOVING IMAGES 10:30-11:00AM
Join host Ken Mocintyre as he takes you
on a tourthroughthesilverscreen'sback
lot of life with film news, reviews, inter-
giant from an earlier era...
(alto sax), Jimmy Knepper i
and "Papa" Jo Jones make tc
lights ride
Jazz recordings:   The Benny Goodman
1938 Carnegie Hall Concert.
22nd In the mid 50s LA drummer Lawrence Marable was looking for a sax
player who was a "rookie" and who spoke
right out, unschooled and unrefinedand
free of Jazz conventions. He found that
"rookie" in James Clay...a young man
from Dallas who caught the attention of
Miles Davis and some of the big guns' in
the music. Tonight: Tenorman, the music
29th Miles Davis at Fillmore, is more than
Miles Davis playing at the legendary rock
palace.    It's revolutionary music that
camps, pro
Recorded o\
nd con. Too heavy' for
wo electric' for Jazzers.
ir four nights in July 1970.
ITSJUSTTALK WITH RJ MOORHOUSE 6:30-
7:30AM
Rebroadcast of Monday night's programme.
THE MORNING SHOW 7:30-8:15AM
See Monday for details. Wake up with
Kim and the Gienn Miller Orchestra.
GARNET TIMOTHY HARRY 8:15-10:0OAM
N REPORT 1-1:15PM
. See Monday for details.
BLOOD ON THE SADDLE 1:15-3:00PM
THE UNHEARD MUSIC 3-5:00PM
Demo Director Dale Sawyer provides
some insights into the best and the worst
of the newest Canadian music. And he's
not telling you which is which!
2nd The Third Runway
9th Education 2000
16th TheUEL: UBC's Receding Tr<
23rd The Expo Hangover
THE MORNING SHOW 7:30-8:15AM
See Monday for details. Wake up with
Luc and Dave.
MORNING BREATH 8:15-10:00AM
Roll over, open one eye, and share your
Wednesday morning waking experience
with Daisy. Cold pizza, lukewarm coffee
THE CiTR NEWS MAGAZINE 5-5:30PM
See Monday for details.
ARTS CAFE 5:30-6:00 PM
In-depth arts analysis and general mis
THE MORNING SHOW ;
See Monday for detail
Stefan and a yard fi
1:15PM
THE RETURN OF NECRO-NEOFILE
tated by MD Chris Buchanan.
THETASTE OF THINGS TO COME 3-5:0OPM
Sound waves to sink yer teeth into, with
yer host Paula the radio sex goddess.
THE CiTR NEWS MAGAZINE 5-530PM
See Monday for details.
INSIDE INFORMATION 5:30-6:OOPM
Join Katherine Vogt and Barbc
for an eclectic view of UBC ar
verse!   News, reviews, previews, interviews and much more. Find out what's
really happening in BC's largest mental
institution. Special focus throughout the
winter  how to land a decent summer
West/South West (you define). Send stuff
JIGGLE NOON-1:00PM
Mikey has book smarts. Gov has street
tunes, and impetuous youthful banter.
JIGGLE JIGGLE JIGGLE til the cr
IT'S NOT EASY BEING GREEN 1:15-2:30PM
The greenest of the CiTR DJ crop try to
germinate and take rool on the air. If
you are interested in CiTR programming
possibilities, phone the Program Director
al 228-3017.
ABSOLUTE VALUE OF NOISE - PART ONE
2:30-3:30PM AND PART TWO 4-5:00PM
Found sounds, tape loops, compositions
of organized and unorganized aurality,
power electricians and sound collage.
Live experimental music.   100% Cana-
,N SERVIETTE PRES-
reailse that Nardwuar and Cleopatra
von Fluffelstein are your friends.
Parcheesy!
THE WELKIN REPORT 5:30-6:00PM
Join Kim Trainor. Stefan Ellis and Heath
Robinson for 1800 seconds of definitive
freauency modulation.
5th Efficacy of Student Movements
AND NOW THIS 6-6 30PM
Peter, and John for a real live band in
your livingroom, automobile or WalkPer-
son. If YOU or YOUR BAND are interested
in participating, give Ed a call at 462-
9281
3th Radio Hell archives
10th Mitch Middle and his Elf
17th The Big Lie
24th Surprise!!
IE VIDEO INTERNATIONAL 7-
is strictly prohibited.
STOMP ON THAT BOPPATRON 9PM-MID-
NIGHT:30
The latest _ greatest in the big dance
floor beat brought to you by DJ Mick
Hard. Pin them needles!
29th Boppatron Best Dance Music in the
80s. Mega guests.
HANFORD NUCLEAR PIZZA PIE   10-11:00
AM
Textbooks beckon.   Which is why I'm
THE SATURDAY EDGE 8AM-NOON
Steve Edge hosts Vancouver's biggest
and best acoustic/roots/rogue folk music radio show.  Now in its fifth year on
CiTR! UK Soccer Report at 11:30.
THE BRUNCH REPORT NOON-12:15PM
News, sports, weather and an appropriate amount of more!
POWERCHORD 12:15-3:00PM
Vancouver's only true metal show with
the underground speed to mainstream
metal; local demo tapes, imports and
other rarities. Gerald Rattlehead and
Metal Ron do the damage.
IN EFFECT 3-5:00PM
The Hip Hop Beat brought to you by Niel
Scobie-straight from the Island.
THE NO HOST BAR 6-8:00PM
Join Pat 8i Lisa as they attempt to understand how music and life realty go together. Or do they? Find out. and then
maybe help us out.
HOOTENANNYSATURDAYNIGHT! 8-10:00
PM
A Lower Mainland favourite for over 30
Song (8:15) to win valuable prizes, guffaw uncontrollably during Let's Ask Valerie (8:40). coll in your votes for the Listener's Choice (9:00). then sit back and
enjoy six bucks' worth of fun on the 50*
Record Hour (9:05). Mmm - good!
MEGABLAST!  1-4:00 AM
Improvisation in many forms. Mixes that
don'tworkbuthadtobetried. Requests
that never get played. Welcome to late
night radio. With Adam Sloan.
6th Skinny Puppy chronologically,
13th Continuation.
UBC Digest and Cityscape listings are
aired several times each day. Hear the
■st events, gigs and
i that campus
d famous skin
cancer site, as well as listings on all the
hip happenings in the city of rain, from
group wants to publicise your event, just
drop off the details here at CP7R on the
second floor of SUB and leave the rest up
18 DISCORDER miiwrnhmnn
soccer to football to ice hockey to basketball. Find out the reason why the "TR"
is in CiTR. Playoff games beckon! Upcoming regular season games carried
by CiTR which will pre-empt regular CiTR
programming:
JANUARY
SATURDAY THE 6TH, 8:00PM:  MENS BASKETBALL VS U OF SASKATCHEWAN.
SATURDAY THE 13TH. 7:30PM: MEN'S ICE
HOCKEY VS U OF REGINA.
FRIDAY THE 19TH, 8:00PM: MEN'S BASKETBALL VS U OF VICTORIA.
SATURDAY THE 20TH, 8:00PM:  MENS
BASKETBALL VS U OF VICTORIA.
FRIDAY THE 26TH, 7:30PM: MENS ICE
HOCKEY VS U OF MANITOBA.
SATURDAY THE 27TH, 8:00PM:  MEN'S
BASKETBALL VS U OF LETHBRIDGE.
HOCKEY VS U OF BRANDON.
SATURDAY THE 17TH, 7:45PM: MEN'S
BASKETBALL VS U OF CALGARY.
CiTR wants you to become involved with
your friendly UBC Radio Station which
broadcastsat 1800wattstothe campus
and beyond. Opportunities abound!
Wheeee! Programming, producing,
editing, writing, engineering, operating,
announcing, hosting, etc etc etc. Come
by the studios during normal office hours.
We're located in Room #233 on the second floor of the Student Union Building.
Or phone us at 228-3017. And yes. Jen
Kelly, everyone is welcome regardless of
age! Socomeonbyandseeforyourself!
THE FOLLOWING FOLKS ARE THE ONES
YOU SHOULD GET AHOLD Of CAUSE
THEY'RE THE ONES YOU SHOULD GET
AHOLD OF.
ARTS DIRECTOR ANTJE RAUWERDE
8USINESS MANAGER . .BARBARAWILSON
DEMO DIRECTOR DALE SAWYER
DEVELOPMENT COORDINATOR	
 LINDA SCHOLTEN
MOBILE SOUND  LANE DUNLOP
MUSIC DIRECTOR ... .CHRIS BUCHANAN
NEWS & CURRENT AFFAIRS DIRECTOR .. .
 STEFAN ELLIS
PRESIDENT LANE DUNLOP
PRODUCTION MANAGER.. ADAM SLOAN
PROGRAM DIRECTOR .... RANDY IWATA
RECORD LIBRARIAN .. JEROME PRINGLE
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M-Th:11-7   Fri: 11-8 Sat:10-7 Sun:12-7
Comics, comix, comiks ?
Comics, definition: ihe usual
fannish formula with only a few
notable exceptions, such as Stray
Toasters, Watchmen, Luther
Arkwright, etc.
Comix, definition: the jazzmeis-
lers dubbed them comix - Zippy,
Trashman, Herald Head, Dr.
Atomic, Whiteman, Checkered
Demon, etc.
Comiks, definition: the edge of
what is street art today - Carel
Moiseiwitsch, Mark Beyer's
Agony, Chester Brown's
Yummy Fur, Savage Pencil,
The Preservation of Obscurity
Numbers 1 & 2
Published by Lump Of Squid
$2.95
Available by Mail
The first two issues of The Preservation of Obscurity have found
their way into my hands. Published by Lumpof Squid, agroup
of fellas living in a warehouse in
Tranna, The Preservation of
Obscuri ly is clcd icalcd to ex tending information in a way thai
challenges the reader lo think for
themselves. In all, a
unique mix of mcta-
mystical mumbo-
jumbo colliding
with classical
themes in a valiant
attempt at grasping
the higher realms.
Writer Shawn
Thomas'dialogue is
a blend of poetry,
somcnotsobad.and
punchlines, some
nol so good, lhal
serve lo propel a storyline that defies description; though
describe I will. Two
gods (Spoot and
Oswalt), born of the
Great Uvula, come
to earth in a search
for "icons".  Afler
bodies, ihey wind up
cavorting with some
oflhcmorcdisgust-
ing party animals
ihis side of Tangiers
(Burroughs meets
Castenada in a back
alley).
The artwork, by Frank
Perna, is hyper-cartoony, rendered in a variety of styles including watcrcolour, pen and ink,
collage, pencil, and digitized
"found" images, lhat work so
well together on the page that he
has created a irue multi-media
book. A clear understanding of
black and white and its relationship with the page is obvious, as
is an intelligent sense of design.
The creative progression between the first and second issues
is startling and bodes well for
future issues. The firstcomik has
a slow watercolour pace that suits
the origin and the introduction of
the main characters. Although
the first issue characterizations
pression whereby the power of
detail brings the story to life.
Through the judicious use of
backgrounds, created by Pema
and Scott James, the creators
manage to simultaneously communicate many levels of reality.
The true feast for the senses is
the lettering. Done in a variety of
ihough they revel in painling ihe
clues that allow you to do it for
yourself. Here is a Irue attempt at
comiks as art and literature as
opposed to the mind numbing
pap disguised as art and designed
for the boppermetal market.
Although obviously not designated for tot or teen, the comik
remains much too dark for
"Adults Only". My guess is that
ire people in iheir
and that the book
would appeal lo ihc same.
The imagery is extreme and the
symbols used will dredge up a
lot of feelings for anyone who
takes time for study. Goddess
knowledge, music as mythology,
virtual ecstasy, apocalyptical
editorial, and street psychology,
all blend together in a twisted
psychedelia that warps ihc reader
in less time than it takes to say
"cat squid".
My main complaint is the
inconsistency between the arche-
typical concept of God bom of
Goddess and the portrayal of
women only as sexual objects.
The main characters in the book
are all male and the only women
to be found inside are portrayed
as whores. Man the creator is a
lovely idea but woman is the
original creator and must be respected as such. The
charge 1 make here
is correctable in future   issues   and   I
: lhal
are consistent with the style of
the comik, they tend to be short
and pointed whereas the second
issue characterizations have a
richer blend of plot and progression. Writing with the visual in
mind is a tricky task at best and
Thomas must learn how to compose his thoughts and ideas in
pictorial form.
In  the  second  issue  the
Squids have learned to use corn-
toons and styles with little regard
for tradition, the words seem to
move across the page.
TPOO is the other side of
Stig's Inferno, where the forces
of darkness and light are blurred
into a pastiche of greys. The
message is not totally clear nor
will it ever be, praise bob, for this
is the Preservation of Obscurity.
The creators of this comik are
not willing to "do it all for you"
of this rank will want
to expand their vision to include real
roles for women.
My second
complaint is the potential for psychobabble that the creators have sel ihcm-
sclvcs up for. Stepping into the mystical is always tricky
and fraught with
dangers unknown by
mortal  minds. The
this direction must
be clearer in conception and origin. If
you want to illuminate, you must first
know where ihe light
switch is located.
All in all, a bold
start for a book lhat
has said quite a lot
and has lots more to say. While
reminiscent of Wolfmans Adventures in Reggae Land in both
the primitech artwork and its
sense of creative freedom, The
Preservation of Obscurity owes
to no one its unique voice and vi-
You can purchase a copy
by mail, send S2.95 to: Lump Of
Squid #100-365 Sorauren Ave.
Toronto,Ont. Canada M6R2G5
20 DISCORDER Butthole Surfers
Widowmaker!
(Fringe)
Not to worry, the Butthole
Surfers' usual mind-numbing
onslaught of terrifying icono-
clasm is present on their latest
EP, Widowmaker!... itis just very
well hidden.
"Bong Song" (no, they do
not do drugs, nor do they know
of anyone who does), the first
track on the record, graciously
presents a whiff of their daily
activities. Oh the wonders of digital delay, eh?
Each verse ofthe next song,
"The Coloured FBI Guy", seems
to actually make sense, though I
can't tell for sure whether the
verses relate to each other. But as
usual, that doesn't seem to matter.
Making out what Gibby
says during the third r hymn,"
Booze, Tobacco, Dope, Pussy,
Cars", can be difficult. Here is a
small hint- the lyrics bare a
marked resemblance to the title!
Lyric audibility is luckily
no problem on the final, and
might I add, might-e-long song.
Helicopter. The lyrics are, however, very strange, but if this
comes as a surprise, you
shouldn't have bought the record.
To sum up, go bonkers and
buy the thing (or the other way
around) and then give it a few
listens beforepassingjudgement.
Like mouldy cheese and gross
stuff that has marinated in a barrel too long, this album is an
acquired taste.
Nit Gritty
The Golden Palominos
A Dead Horse
(Celluloid)
This time the Golden Palominos' switching membership
includes Anton Fier, Amanda
Kramer, Bill Laswell, and Nicky
Skopelitis. With the exception of
Kramer, each performed on the
critically acclaimed album, Blast
of Silence(1986). Sadly, the brilliant, innovative edge of the last
album is absent on A Dead Horse.
Fier's once imaginative
presence is obliterated by mannerism and his use of techniques
perfected on the three previous
Palominos albums. Whereas the
bits-and-pieces, compositional
mode employed on Blast of Silence sounded fresh, on A Dead
Horse it is taken to an over-extended extreme. "Wild River",
for example, is a stylistic jumble
of pseudo-country and quasi-
funk which sounds choppy and
irritating. To make matters worse,
the Palominos repeat this formula, rhythm and style on "Angel
of Death." (They could combined
"Wild River" and "Angel of
UNDER REVIEW
Death" and nobody would notice the difference.)
The album is not a complete write-off, though. "A Letter Back" and "Lucky" provide
the listener with methodical lyrics and nicely arranged guitar
work, but nothing very innovative. The brightest aspect of A
Dead Horse is the distinctive
vocals of Amanda Kramer on
"Darklands"   and   "Shattered
Image".
WillReith
Ian McCulloch
Candleland
(WEA)
Ian McCulloch's "Candle-
land" is his first solo effort since
the break up of Echo and the
Bunnymen. It is a personal expression of McCulloch's confusion over his own past and his
difficulty in coming to terms with
his desires for the future; a recurring theme is hope and desire for
that which is knowingly unobtainable.
Lush acoustic guitar, simple
synth drum tracks, orchestration
and a guest appearance by Elizabeth Fraser ofthe Cocteau Twins
serves to make Candleland very
listenable in a mesmerizing way.
The problem is a lack of edge,
both musically and lyrically. The
musical originality and lyrical
ferocity that fueled Echo and the
Bunnymen masterpieces, such as
"Ocean Rain", are absent. Only
"In Bloom" indicates the presence of such former talents.
"Candleland" is a good album but Ian McCulloch is capable of much more.
Gene Derreth
The Demons
Hair of the Dog
(Cassette)
Recorded live at the Yale
this past summer, the Demons'
second cassette release- like ihc
first, self-produced and self-promoted- is entitled Hair of the
Dog. BandleaderandbassistJack
Lavin plans similar home-grown
efforts every eight months or so,
unlil by force of attrition someone with clout in the music industry sits up and takes notice.
And judging by the consistency
of this effort somebody should.
Lavin, guitarist Tim
Hearsey, drummer Rex Fugard,
and sometimes-Demon, organist Dave Vidal, stick to their guns
with this latest affair, knocking
out hard-nosed, bass-propelled
R&B and blues rock. The title
track, a macho metal rocker, is
really the only departure from
American roots music the band
makes. With the exception of
"Sex of the Gods", an original
instrumental which uses octaves
very nicely a la Wes Montgomery, the other tunes are mostly
covers of people like Otis Rush
andBuddy Guy and Junior Wells-
well known heavyweights in the
blues world.
Standout tracks are those
featuring Hearsey, a player
whose fantastic melodic sense,
while best appreciated live, does
survive being squeezed into a
small plastic case. When he rips
loose on "Poison Ivy" (not the
Coasters tunc, buta frenetic R&B
thumper of the same name), his
soulful growl sounds
mcnacing:"When I shave, wear
my housecoat/Two men have lo
hold me so I don'l cut my throat
/ Don't like to brag, don't like to
say what I'm gonna do/I'm like
poison ivy, gonna break out all
over you!" Hair of the Dog is
available directly from tlie band.
Lachlan Murray
DISCORDER
DATEBOOK
FRI 22 NoFunChristmosShowotthe
ArtsClub... Jazzmanian Devils at the Railway Club... Oliver and the Elements at
the Yale... The Cult at the Coliseum... Exhibition by Mary Scott end at the UBC
Pine Arts Gallery...
SAT 23 NoFunChristmasShowatthe
Arts Club..Jazzmanian Devils at the Railway Club... Oliver and the Elements at
the Yale... Christmas Dance at the IWA
Hall,. Rockschoolon the Knowledge Network (5:30pm)...
edge Network (9:30pm)...
brate Christmas Yard
WED 27 The Dots at the Railway
Club... The Demons at the Yale... SEVA
Benefit with Crazy Fingers at the Arlington (8:00. S5)...
THU 28   NoMeansNo and Mary   at
the Town Pump... The Demons at the
FRI 29 CiTR Presents Chilly Uptown
and Ready_Willingat the Commodore...
64 Funnycars at the Arts Club...
Razorbacks at the Town Pump... The
Demons at the Yale...
Super Sounds at the Sheraton Plaza 500.. .
Rockschool on the Knowledge Network
(5:30pm)„.
SUN 31 CiTR Presents The Death of
1989 with Curious George and Bombshells at the Arts Club... Scramblers at
the Town Pump... The Demons at the
Yale... Nervous Fellas at the Vancouver
Rowing Club... Sons ol Freedom at the
Miners, Memory Day at the Cinderella
Ballroom... The Explosive Sound Clash
with tittle Gemini and Earl the Peart
Sound at the IWA Hall... Variant Cause
with Razorbacks at the Central Tavern
(Seattle). Walkabouts. Screaming Trees
and Terry lee Hale at The Backstage (Seattle)... Rockschool on the Knowledge
Network (9:30pm)...
JANUARY WED 3 strutt-jor-
dan Guitar Duo at the UBC Recital Hall
(12:30pm)...
THU 4 PianistRobertSilvermanatthe
UBC Recital Hall (7:15pm)...
FRI 5 OhMyGodMyMom'sonChan-
nel 10 record release party with Young
Fresh Fellows, The Smugglers, The tl 150s,
The Touch and Go's, The Nightstalkers.
The Evaporators at the Cinderella Ballroom (35. all ages)...
SAT 6 Oh My God My Mom's on
Channel lOrecord release partywithThe
Vindicators, The Mono Men, The Mighty
s, The W
tfthe
Cinderella Ballroom (S5. all ages)... Movies for Kids at the Vancouver East Cultural Centre with Honey I Shrunk the Kids
(1:30pm. pay what you can)...
Rockschool on the Knowledge Network
(5:30pm)...
SUN 7 Rockschoolon the Knowledge
Network (9:30pm)...
WED 10 Tom Parriottontrumpetand
Edward Norman on piano at the UBC
Recital Hall (12:30pm)...
FRI 12 CiTR Presents Bruce A and the
Secular Atavists at the Arts Club...
SAT 13 CiTRPresentsBruceAandthe
Secular Atavists at the Arts Club... Movies for Kids at the Vancouver East Cultural Centre with 20000 Leagues under
the Sea (1:30pm. pay what you can)...
Rockschool on the Knowledge Network
(5:30pm)...
SUN 14 Rockschool on the Knowledge Network (9:30pm)...
WED 17 TheB-52'swithLoveTractor
at the Orpheum .. Bartok's Sonata for 2
Pianos and Percussion at the UBC Recital Hall (12:30pm)... Sweeney Todd directed by French Tickner opens at the
Freddy Wood Theatre (8pm) and continues through February 3...
THU  18   Alice Cooper at the Pacfc
Coliseum...
FRI 19 TomJonesattheQueenEliza-
beth Theatre...
SAT 20 Movies for Kids at the Vancouver East Cultural Centre with Oliver
work (5:30pm)...
SUN 21   Rockschoc
Network (9:30pm)...
WED 24 SopranoDebraParkerand
Pianist Alison Voth atthe UBC Recital Hall
(12:30pm)...
THU 25 Gary Fjellgaard at the Vancouver East Cutural Centre...
SAT 27 Gary Fjellgaard at the Vancouver East Cultural Centre... Movies tor
Kids at the Vancouver East Cultural
Centre with Swiss Family Robinson
(1:30pm. pay what you can)...
Rockschool on Knowledge Network
(5:30pm)...
SUN 28 CiTR Presents Phranc at the
Town Pump... Nancy McMaster at the
Vancouver East Cultural Centre...
Rockschool on Knowledge Network
(9:30pm)...
MON 29 CiTR Present. Chilly Up-
Commodore...
WED 3 1   PurcellStringQuartetatthe
UBC Recital Hall (12:30pm)...
FEBRUARY THU 1 ^Presents
Game Theory... Jazz Quintet at the UBC
Recital Hail (12:30pm)...
FRI 2 UBC Contemporary Players directed by Stephen Chatman and
Geoffrey Michaels at the UBC Recital
Hall (12:30pm)...
SAT 3 OrfordStringQuartetattheUBC
Recital Hall (7:15pm)...
TUE 6 Students in Recital at the UBC
Recital Hall (12:30pm)...
WED 7 Gregory Cox on trombone
and Nancy Bussard on piano at the UBC
Recital Hall (12:30pm)...
THU 8 UBC Symphony Orchestra directed by Eric Wilson at the Old Auditorium (12:30pm)...
FRI 9 TheSecondAnnualWinterRoots
Festival with Ancient Cultures. The Dots,
and James Keelaghan Trio hosted by
Seattle's Sam Weis at the Vancouver
EastCulturalCentre(8pm): plus WISE Hall
Cabaretwtih Roots RoundupO 1:30pm)...
UBC Symphony Orchestra directed by
Eric Wilson at the Old Auditorium
(8:00pm)...
SAT 10 WinterRootsFes.ivalcontin-
ueswith Workshops atthe WISE Hall( 11 am
to 7pm); Ngai Lum Music Society. Nyetz.
and Faith Nolan hosted by David
Campbell at the Vancouver East Cultural Centre (8pm); and WISE Hall Cabaret with Roots Roundup (11:30pm)...
SUN 1 1   WinterRoc
ueswith Works hops at the WISE Hdl(l lam
y Forbes hosted b
ie WISE H<
WED 14 PeterBermgJazzTrioatthe
UBC Recital Hall (12:30pm)..
TUE 20 In the Spotlight Students in
Recital at the UBC Recital Hall (8pm)..
WED 21 Eckhardt-Grammate 1989
Music Competition Winner pianist Janice Girard on at the UBC Recital Hall
(12:30pm)...
THU 22 UBCWindEnsembledirected
by David Brantner in the Old Auditorium
(12:30pm).. .Eliot Fisk onguitar in the UBC
Recital Hall (7:15pm)...
FRI 23 CiTR Presents The Sugarcubes
and The Wonderstuff at the Commodore... UBC Wind Ensemble directed by
David Brantner in the Old Auditorium
(8pm)...
MON 26 CiTR Presents an evening
with The The with Johnny Marr at the
Commodore Ballroom...
TUE 27   CiTRPresentsaneveningwith
WED 28 Obofet LawrenceChern,
at the UBC Recital Hall (12:30pm)...
PLACESPLACESPLACES
ARTS CLUBSEY MOUR 1181 Seymour Street
683-0151
CENTENNIALTHEATRE 23rd and Lonsdale.
North Vancouver
CLUBSODA  1055 Homer Street 681-8202
COMMODORE BALLROOM 870 Granville
Street 681-7838
84 STREET MUSIC HALL former Expoo Site
683-8687
FIREHAU ARTS CENTRE 280 East Cordova
Street 689-0926
FREDERICWOODTHEATRE 6454Crescent
Road. UBC 228-2678
GRUNT GALLERY   209 East 6th Avenue
IWA HALL 2859 Commercial Drive (at
12th Avenue) 322-5079
IAQUEN A COFFEEHOUSE llllComme,-
PACIFIC CINEMATHEQUE     1131  Howe
Street 688-3456
PIT PUB    Basement of SUB 228-6511
PITTINTERNATIONALGALLERIES 36POW
Street 734-8001
RJ CHRISTIES    315 East Broadway 876-
6777
RAILWAY CLUB 579DunsmuirStre«
1625
RECITAL HALL    School of Music
RIDGETHEATRE 3131 Arbutus Street 738-
6311
SHERATON PLAZA S00 12th and Cambie
STATION STREET ARTS CENTRE 930 Station
Street 688-3312
STUDIO 58 Main Building. Langara
Campus 324-5227
SUBTHEATRE Student Union Building.UBC
TOWN PUMP 66 Water Street 683-6695
VANCOUVER EAST CINEMA 2290 Commercial Drive 253-5455
VANCOUVER EAST CULTURAL CENTRE
1895 Venables Street 254-9578
VANCOUVER LITTLE THEATRE 3102 Main
Street 876-4165
VIDEO IN 1102 Homer Street 688-4336
WISE HALL    1882 Adanac Street (right
your listings included here, just submit
any and all details to Discorder Date-
book, c/o Discorder Magazine. 6138 SUB
Boulevard. Vancouver. BC V6T2A5. Oh.
JANUARY 1990 21 The following are interviews with fashion burnouts I call
closely at my life.
MS: And at your closet, I bet.
G: Exactly. For a young guy, I had a helluva lot of
clothes. More than I remember my mother ever having.
I donated my collection lo the temple for iheir auction.
When I decided to give even the clothes off my back is
when I turned to Kadraa's ways.
MS: Any chance you'll re-assimilate in western society,
Guru? You'd probably look good in a mock-tunlcncck.
G: (Laughs) No chance of that, my friend. I'm in Kadraa's sacred garments now, what could look better?
Second Interview
Date: November 9, 1989.
Place: Canadian Armed Forces Base, Chilliwack.
MAN SHERBET: (Attempt at humour) I low should wc
start? How about name, rank, and serial number?
S-LT. MORREY: Okay, well, il's Sub-Lieutenant Judith
Mcrrey, four - we don't need to bother with ihc rest, do
we?
MS: Can you describe a bit of your background? I ihink
this sounds fascinating.
S-LT. M:Thankyou, sir. Well, I'm 31 years old, and I'm
a recent graduate ofthe officer training program here at
Chilliwack. A few years ago I studied at the Los Angeles
College of Design. I apprenticed at a number of fashion
publications in Toronto. I was lured to Vancouver by
work on a mid-sized magazine as assistant graphic design manager.
by The Man Shcrbcl
.^^ by 1 ho Man _hcrbcl
vAsimims
"The 80's? Good Riddance!" I overheard my crotchety Uncle
Shep say at Thanksgiving dinner. I wouldn't go as far as my
irascible relative in condemning the last ten years. Certainly,
some good came of it all. But there were definite victims ofthe
decade. Some tried harder than others to stay ahead of the game,
and paid the price. In the 60's and 70's it was drugs that really
did people's heads in. In the 80's the new drug was fashion.
First Interview
Date: September 12,1989.
Place: Kadraa Man Temple, South Burnaby.
MAN SHERBET: Am I pronouncing your name cor-
recdy - Guru Ban Hedrat?
G: Yes, lhat's correct.
MS: I'd like to gel a hide background, if you don'l mind.
You went to high school in greater Vancouver, did you
not?
G: Yes, that's right, Burnaby North, grad '78. I was
dumped into the real world at the height of disco-mania,
which I think was my firsl disadvantage.
MS: How so?
G: Well, you look at me now in these bright robes, il's
hard to imagine. Before grade twelve I walked around
with a star on my ass, wide-legged patch-pocket jeans,
whatever. Polyester shirts. Suddenly lhat year I fell compelled to be "fashionable." I was just another John Travolta imitator at the time, of course. I was thrown into the
world wilh a taste for gold chains and snug pants. Naturally, I tried hard to keep up after lhat.
MS: Keep up?
G: I became your typical nightclub goer. Jordachc jeans,
Members-Only jackets, La Cosle shirts. Oh, I_, Coslc
shirts, they nearly finished me off. I couldn't buy the
imitations, no way! Those blasted things got up lo forty-
five, fifty bucks, and I was still filling my drawers wilh
22 DISCORDER \'
them. Green ones, pink ones. Then leather tics. Y'know
lhal Billy Joel song - "Still Rock'n'Roll lo Me"? Bright
orange sneakers, and so on? 'lhat describes me perfectly
ai the time.
MS: Of course, rockabilly revived itself about lhat time
G: Uh-huh. I tried sideburns out for a lime, but girls
didn't like ihem.
MS: Now, before you discovered the icmpleand its faith,
you led a slightly different life, didn't you?
G: lhat's right. My birth-name was Peter Wilkins. I was
a car salesman for many years at NcwWcst Isuzu. I was
just your average guy. I liked my beer, I smoked Players,
I chased girls, I always drove a new-model car. But then
I hit the wall.
MS: You mean hke a marathoner?
G: Well, not exactly, 'least not the way I smoked. I'd had
aboul three months of really poor sales. I'd put on a fair
bit of weight over ihc years, so it became a running battle
lo keep mc in clothes that fit. Not lo mention I liked lo
look good. But my sales record was really dogging me,
and I worried about keeping my job. One day these
freaky-looking guys in robes came on the lot looking to
buy a used van we'd advertised. They must've sensed
right there I was an unhappy puppy. They invited me to
cat down ai the temple, saying it would be die healthiest
meal I would eat. 1 look 'cm up on it. I talked wilh a few
people down there, who persuaded mc to look more
MS: It would be fair to guess lhal how you dressed was
a constant concern.
S-LT.M: Yes sir, very much so. Various things made
that concern grow loo. I was encouraged to create a fashionable "look" for the magazine. I very much had an
image to uphold, for the magazine and myscl f. I'd slip oul
to Robson Street or the Vancouver Showman on breaks.
I'd try on new outfits, or put them on hold if I ran out of
time. I must've looked like a real sucker to ihem, 'cause
there wasn't much I wouldn't Iry on, not much less 1
wouldn't buy.
MS: Kind of a smorgasbord approach to clothes-buying,
huh? Carry on.
S-LT. M: Well, except lhat there's no "all-you-can-cal"-
type deals to be found on Robson. I was one broke balx;
when the bills came in. Then ihe unexpected happened
wilh the magazine - it went belly up. The initial financing fell through.
MS: So, no problem for you, you just gel a Ul Iaul and
head back to Toronto.
S-LT. M: I thought so loo, Mr. Sherbet. Bul this feeling
came over me. Realistically, I could'vc used a 5-lontnick
to move me and my clothes back cast. I considered how
much I'd bought over the months, and a profound sense
of moral sickness came over me. I was, am, a fashion-
MS: Surely, you could've gotten some help.
S-LT. M: But I couldn't guess where from at the lime,
sir. An aimlessness inhabited me for weeks. I wandered
the streets - looking very sharp mind you - without
direction. One day Icame across the C. A.F. recruiter, and
discovered my only hope was supreme self-discipline.
MS: Tell me, are the clothes in some mini-sloragc
somewhere? I know a couple of girls lhat arc your size.
S-LT. M: Sorry, sir. A couple of my fellow rccmils and
I had a bonfire to beat the band after we finished basic officer training. I kept a few nice undcrgamicnls because
the regulation stuff chafes mc, but the rest of it is ash.
MS: Well, good luck, Lieutenant. I guess it's off lo
Cyprus soon, huh?
S-LT. M: Yes sir, just me and a duffel-bag load of
khakis.
Third Interview
Date: December 1, 1989.
Place: Matsqui Correctional Centre.
we'll begin.
CHANG: Jack Chang.
MS: I was always a fan of your art. Are you still
productive now that you're here?
C: The warden has been very supportive, and encourages
me to work in a little studio set up next to the wood shop.
It's a bit noisy around there, but it beats nothing.
MS: Well, il's nice to hear a few years of incarceration
isn't going
to stop the famed Vincent Veneer (Jack Chang's artistic
pseudonym). You know, there isn't a publication in ihis
country that hasn't run something about the greatness of
Vincent Veneer. When you exhibited your work in
Toronto in late '87 it was sheer sensation. But then no one
heard from you for months. We've since found out you
went underground. Why abandon success. Jack?
C: It seemed politically correct at the time. I'm bound by
my role as an artist to make politically wise decisions.
Plus, my girlfriend at the lime made some comment like,
"Yer gonna get your own talkshow next, you'll see." I'd
ignored her woman's intuition before and regretted it.
MS: Did you both decide on your next image as artist/
urban guerilla?
C: Well, Candy - my old girlfriend - had some ideas
along military lines, yeah. She wanted me to toughen up
my image. She got me into the jack boots, the Eisenhower jackets arid so on. It was some other friends of
mine who suggested bombing Hydro substations and
MS: You really had an effect, I remember. Art students
started lo lake off on the whole "Top Gun" thing. Emily
Carr college looked Like Stalag 17 for a while.
C: 1 was really burned aboul lhal. It really just started as
a joke on my part. But then certain art collectives began
sponsoring Survival games. For some, they just liked
gelling shot,wilh ihe paint capsules, for others it was
serious sluff. There were plans for "art colonies" situated
in the mountains, strapped in for Armageddon. Some
suggested ninning attacks on Deep Cove to lop-up supplies. Man, I don't know many artists who could live in
the woods, do you? Even Toni Onlcy would starve and
he's been ihere.
MS: So Ihe army boots, ihe sashes, ihe medals, the
helmets were all part of an elaborate put-on?
C: Yes, you've got to believe me. The prosecutor tried to
piakc mc sound like Manson, like I was starting my own
"family". Whal happened was lhat Candy and a few of
the others got oul of hand. I wasn't into ihe Anmore substation bombing, but they insisted violent action was the
next artistic movement, and I would be at the vanguard.
Really, I was feeling pretty insecure at the time so I believed than.
MS: That was your court defense, wasn't it? That you
were feeling insecure at the time?
C: I would've fired that lawyer if I had more money. The
whole guerilla operation, plus all the nights at Denny's
planning it, broke me.
MS: So you' re repudiating ihc sty le and the actions of the
New Aesthetic Front? Is Vincent Veneer going to go
preppy?
C: 1 ley, I don't want lo sound like a light-ass, but I would
tell all the art school, black-clad, funky Gestapo-types to
clean up ihere acts. There's no future in rebellion, unless
you really want to be somebody's "boy" in block four,
like mc. Get your mom to dress you. She's probably pi
ing for it anyway.
lypay-
MAN SHERBET: Please suite your n
MS: What should we expect from Vincent Veneer once
he gets out?
C: Besides good behaviour? Well, I'm going through'a
"nude" phase currendy. I've got parole in eight months,
so don't be surprised if streaking catches on again next
Acid-wash, acid-house, acid rain - we're all programmed, sound-bitten to the point where we don't who
know we are. I tip my cap to the marketers, the opinion-
mongers and the inventors who've made us remote-control-switchers all, expecting new things, at every moment, at every turn in the road. They won the battle ofthe
80's.
I'm praying for a stoical 90's decade. We could use
ihe lime to catch up. Heck, what would be wrong with
wearing Uncle Shep's hand-me-downs? L01.9  fM
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