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Lowery's Claim Jan 1, 1906

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Array 1
Lowrrv's Claim is published monthly
and sent to any part of the world,
postpaid, for $1 a year.   Address
all letters to
Canada. NELSON, B. C.
Mrs. Mary Ramsey Woods is a
lady who is not afraid to tell her
age. She is 118 years old, and was
born on a farm near Knox ville,
Tenn., May 20, 1787. She has
been married twice, both her husbands being dead. One of her
children died at tbe age of 98, two
yea 1*8 ago. For a great many years
she haa lived in Hillsboro, Oregon,
with her only living child, Mrs. C.
B. Reynolds. Mrs. Reynolds is 75
years old.
Mrs. Woods has been a Methodist for 106 years. For some years
she has been careful of herdiet,
living principally upon vegetables.
She takes three meals a clay and
occasionblly eats pork and other
meats. She Ihis never eaten cake
or preserves to any extent, but has
always used plenty of strong coffee.
8he evinces a lively interest in
human affair-, and takes a walk in
the yard on sunny days.
The lesson of her life points the
way to long life by becoming a
Methodist, marrying young, drinking coffee and avoiding sweetmeats.
However, we think the old lady
could have prolonged her life a
great many years if she had not
formed the habit of drinking enffee
in her early youth.
Talking of Mrs. Woods puts us
iu mind of an incident that occurred years ago when we were fishing
ideas out of our upper stope for a
paper published amid the oil-scented ozone of Petrolia. On a farm
near the town lived a man named
McNab who was 112 years old.
His son, 75 years of age, was the
only other occupant of tbe house.
Tbe boy would sometimes get
drunk and stay out nights playing
the bagpipes with a band of local
savages who would oat haggis and
then drink Scotch to give it a bath.
In the cold nights of winter the old
man often slept on  tbe floor so as
to be near the heat of the stove.
Occasionally in the summer time a
parson would walk out to the farm
and endeavor to get the old chap to
kneel in prayer, but he was always
too busy for that kind of spiritual
comfort.      Occasionally somebody
who was not a parson would take a
stroll out to chat with the old man,
and always found that he had plenty
oc  time  to drop his spade and sit
down when a flask of Old Rye and
a plug of tobacco  were produced.
However, all things seem to pass,
and  so  at the age of  112 McNab
cashed  in and bit the aerial tram
for   the   land   where   the sexless
angels push clouds to and  fro, although many unkind people have
vainly tried to make us believe that
when  the Scotch die they go tei a
place that would melt clouds and
leave no slag.    When the old man
was buried  we  wrote his obituary
and remarked  in caustic language
that lie might   have  lived  much
longer if his son and a relative by
the name of Growder had taken
better care of him.    To the roast
Growder made strong objections,
and for months afterwards every
time he came to town he would call
at our office with  the avowed intention openly expressed of thrashing the reporter who wrote up the
funeral.    When John would come
in we would hand him the best seat
in the office and tell him to wait a
while as the villan who wrote the
article  would  be  in  any minute.
Then we  would tell hitn that the
fellow who wrote the article was a
bad man, seven feet high and the
greatest pugilist in seven counties
barring  Hiram   Cooley   and  Pete
Cameron.    We even showed him a
picture   of   John L. Sullivan ancl
told him that was our reporter, but
nothing  would  fizz on   Growder.
He was bound to smash tbe journalistic iconoclast who had wounded
his feelings so deeply.    We never
iucliued  much to deception but at
that time the humor of the situation struck us so forcibly that we
kept it up on John for months
although we always squared our
conscience by buying him a drink
before he left town, as the water
in those days was so bad in Petrolia
that a man would get oil wells in
his stomach if be drank much of it.
Some Yankees are short on modesty ancl good taste. Not loug ago
the decorating of a Methodist
church at Winnipeg was left to a
family from the States. When the
congregation came to boost for the
Lord on account of the great emp of
wheat they were confronted by a
blaze of Stars and Stripes with
Roosevelt's fat picture in the center. A sensation was created, mauy
peoplo refusing to worship, tbe
Lord until the starry flag was re-
placetl by a Union Jack, and Ted's
picture shoved into the background.
We have not hean\ but suppose
prayers were offered up for this
awful sin. Really it was a huge
piece of gall upon the part of the
immodest family from the States.
The marble caves discovered by
Charles Deutschuian in British
Columbia promise to become the
greatest wonder and attraction on
the American continent. There is
nothing like these caves in the
known world, and when properly
advertised they will bring to this
province thousands of tourists and
millions of dollars in money.
The Vancouver World has reached the red ink era, which makes it
look like a bunk of paper, a daub
of ink and a splotch of blood. It is
in the dime novel class, and revels
in tho horrors that hover over the
wrecks made by accident, suicide
war and murder.
When the present Dowie passes
away there will never be another
one, as there is not enough of gall
left in the world to make another.
Be good and you will miss the
Just Uhe the nowcrs
Are the Human Pace.   ��^
We are but like flowers that
bloom today on the hillside, and
tomorrow other flowers scent the
air. The fruit of pleasure, we are
brought into tlm world without our
consent, toothless, bald-beaded and
*    e ��� ���  ���.ill*   n,->/l   ny*.
a'  M   M
for tbe purpose of serving tbe people and not to make money, especially at the expense of efficiency.
Our postal system is behind the
date in many ways, and should be
improved. The complaints from
many places in tbe west indicate
that leas economy and more attention to the wants of the people is
what we want.    All  large towns
Babes today, boys tomorrow, and
theu the summer of our life slowly
changing to  autumn and winter
while the hearse is ever ready to wime ��*��  �����**,....   ._
pack us to the portals of the grave should have free delivery instead
where loving hands mingle our re- of taxing the public for box rem.
*'*���*��� ma a. *> %
consent, toothless, lmld-hj*deu anu ��� ^ th7 ormation and we
foolish.   We bawl for milk and are KS^lrS according to
IOU1ISU. liv   *~... .   -
flim-flammed with imitation goods.
While still foolish we are baptised
in some holy church and our souls  	
saved before we knew that wo had glory of God.
one. Gradually we grow up to be a
slave,  hypocrite or damfule.    The
parson says we are full of original
sin and must come to Jesus or bc*
damned.    We hunt for Jesus, and
find the road blocked with tollgates
and a thousand boosters running
to and fro,  each claiming to have
the only key to the combination.
Time goes on and our moustache
asks for a showdown   while we sip
honey of love,  as a bee kisses the
rose, and forgetting Jesus and his
brokers we climb into heaven over
the transom, patter our feet upon
the gold-paved streets of the*New
Jerusalem,   drink   the   cocktails
mixed for the gods, and roll in the
flower garden that butts into the
great white throne.
Love grows cold and a frost hits
' ��T-iL,v     Ann)Ara
UlalllB Wiem   wmun*    ���-*-.	
silently *leep until, according to
the fable, Gabe toote his horn and
we rise to shake the bones for the
rhree Different Wovs.
A  short time  ago a New York
parson! had a harlot arrested and
fined $3.
Two thousand years ago a howling mob brought a harlot before
Christ for trial. He told the poor
woman to go and sin no more.
Over in Butte Judge Warren
goes Christ one better. The other
day he not only discharged a harlot
brought before him  for trial, but
London is becoming filled with
six-penny doctors. They come
principally from Scotland, ancl
charge 12 cents for advice and a
bottle of medicine. These prices
seem low in comparison to the
prices charged in the west. Here
in this glorious country a cloc*tor
sizes up your pile and charges you
accordingly, without the medicine.
The druggist gets his graft in ou
that aud robs you in Lit in.
We have received along account
of a battle  iu a dance* house* at
Kerry, Wash., but cannot publish
it as this journal is one of comment
t.roueht before him  lor trial, one  it ^ urn. journal ibu...... --������
3 her the prlo. of * ����. and P��M"^X^   *bl��2
... . A_   a. a    ....   .��.    Iwiiiii-t   AIK    ;  ��� -ttfTAHlMltRUV      ^0        OUWIlPi
telling her to trot away home and
be a better girl ^^J#
on earth were like Christ and \V ar-
ren sin would soon become obsolete.
coun*,   occasionally   we   poWtoh
news that happen.nl  hundred*<>
ve.re ago, just to pout the .giorant
oTStoS that were doing WW*
* ... ., . i _..   ..r<-.iitui tne?
ren sin would soon become oosoei^   0, tlllllg8 t a��  ^' ���nd the
When evil is neither punished   or the prtm lit the lamps arounu
condemued it soon dies out.    The w0rui.
*- a     __i:        ......rtu    And **��*
W UVli v*it  �������   a---**--*--      r f���.
condemued it soon dies out.    lhe
' Love grows cold and a frost inw | ciam0ring   of   police,   courts anc
the* New Jerusalem.    The flowers churchea against evil ouly *?.!* IT j     i������-- ��� - ���    ..   lhe fainollH
shrivel,  the snow  covers   up the aUve.   R^t not and the devil will  not fail to take asho^ l^r ha8 ft
gold,  ihe bottle goes dry and the  flt,e from you  like a bear snuffing  Kootenay saloo        1 he bar
���ELL ia whitP. but not with the thft ^rments of   a man   playing wido range of IU
Tourist* when in *^������
gold,  tne  ooine gw�� u��j ****** v,,v i nee irom  yw-u  ��� ������-
throne is white, but not with t-he|t|ie garments of
paint of fancy and superstition.    It dea(j
iduuiuh] Kootenay s��iw-	
playing1 wide range of life savers and >ou
i can ��et a gin geyser or a snowsiiuo
uiiiuvwi muv; ��..��������j  uviev..     i. i��.,:i    ..uiuint     disturbing 'tue
s the Real Goods, and as we grope <s>. lM^|.��!tf5�� t^Wilndthe
around for Jesus in  tbe terrible      Those   dealers   in   gloom,   M e, equanimity of the man  m.
bHz'rd the oack door opens and  Lord's Day Alliance Wj%^g drinks.
quick as a flash  De*i>a^ seizes us approached l��*jj*3  "
A. ut- ;��� ������ nnd  up  tiiko the with a nroposition they wanau w*r
plenty oi backs at tne siae uuure w
take you away when you get energy
enough to help yourself.
a m ��������� * I 	
ough to help yourself. fc ^1���J��?TtoH��^ i8' " 1*��*���'
And  thus the  game goes ou.lhad a surplus. ���"
Railroad Built to Music.
Abomey, the town in which Be-
banzin, king of Dahomey, lived,
was infamous 18 years ago for the
slaughter of human beings that
took placo there annually. Some
thousands of men and women were
killed to be companions of deceased
persons in the other world. All
prisoners of war were thus sacrificed and many slaves were purchased from other countries for this
Then the French overthrew the
monster Behazin and brought peace
of mind to the million of people
whom he had ruled with
became clamorous for re-employment.
When the coast section was being built the inland part of the
line was also started, but under different labor conditions. In the interior the natives had not learned
to work for the white man, and
tbey would not enter into bis service until their chiefs brought pressure to bear upon them.
A goodly sum was promised to
each chief if he could guarantee to
supply a certain number of men.
In this way sufficient labor was
procured. The chiefs were held
responsible for the faithfulness of
their men.    The laborers were well
a rod of
iron. Five years ago they began Ij paid,
to build a railroad, which has nowj But it took some time to train
reached Abomey, the scene of the, tho men for this hard work. Their
human sacrifices. j native music seemed to provide the
The completed part of the rail-! stimulus they needed, and so scores
road is 75 miles long, and many | of muiscians were provided with
hundreds of tho natives are now I tomtoms or drums, horns and other
grading the. roadbed for its extension to the Nigger river. The
French have had some funny experiences in building this road.
The French had no  difficulty in
getting the coast natives to work
squeaky instruments were employed.
They distributed music all along
the line. The blacks seemed to forget their fatigue when the music
struck up, and so the tomtoms and
on*the road, because they had been \ horns helped railroad extension all
trained to work for nearly 10 years,: the way to Abomey.���Washington
had become used to labor and liked Post.
its substantial results.    There was
trouble,   however,   when the road-
bed approached the large native!
town of Walda, which is filled with j
delights   that   are   dear   to    the
Few Dahomeyads, when thoy go
near this town, can resist the temptation tei mako a holiday there.
When the railroad came within
sight of Walda the workmen had
just received their wage
deserted to a man and it
tain that they would do no more
work till they had spent all their
No effort was made to get the
men back, but messengers were
sent through the country to ring
tho bells in every settlement and
proclaim that tho French would
pay good wages to women and.girls
Sentence Sermons.
Truth needs no tinsel.
Weakness cannot wait.
Friends never come in flocks.
Love is the great human loadstone.
Labor   is   the   noblest   of   all
Every sin would like to syndicate
.    They I itself.
wascer-j'   The world  needs kindness more
than creeds.
All   saints   are   homemade but
none aro self made.
When religion is only a thing it
is worse than nothing.
Enough   is   as good as a feast;
more leads but to famine.
Even a child knows the difference
to work on  the railroad.    Within between piety and padding.
a clay  many hundreds of women      No man can bean infidel who has
and girls  were carrying buckets of any faith in human nature.
sand on their heads to dump into a
marsh across which tho track was
to be laid.
The roadbed for tho rails was
thus built across the marsh, and
the women were retained in the
service until Walda was reached,
wheu tbe faithless men suddenly
Tho day of rest is never the better for making it a day of rust.
Look to your  works and your
wings will tako care of themselves.
It is for him to forgive the man
who has wronged the other fellow.
The * 'cloth isau effective insula
tor between men and the ministry.
Too many hope to bull their own
religious stock by bearing that of
The top notch of sentiment is
gained more easily than the lowest
step of service.
Many times do we forget the
names of our troubles and our
treasures transposed.
He who by causing pain to others wishes to obtain pleasure himself, he. entangled in the bonds of
hatred, will never be free from
Twelve back numbers of the old
series of Lowery's Claim and a
copy of Float will bo sent to any
address upon receipt of $1.
Many of the people in Montreal
would rotten-egg Christ and his
mother if they dropped into that
city and opened  up a gospel mill.
Variet}' of food makes us overeat. You cannot overeat very long
if ouly one kind of food is used.
In every land tbe priests have
ever striven to blow out tbe lamps
lit bv the men of science.
Pearls are often found in slime,
and truth in the bible.
stark Eg & eo.
njslsos. "��. c.
Civil Engineer and Provincial  Land Surveyor.
TRAIL,   ���  -   -   B. O.
has tbe largest Stock of Pipes, To-
baccoes, Cigars and Smokers'
Sundries in the interior
of B. C.
Mail Orders lloceivo Prompt Attention
From trie Tar West
Writes Brother Angus.
Nelson, B* C.
Dear Donald:���
4-3      ��^��      <*3
far as getting a new courthouse is
concerned. The courthouse* in
Nelson is a stuffy disgrace to the
city, aud is enough to drive the
judges mad or to the bottle with
the snakes curled in the bottom.
as exhibits in the parvenu show of Even since I have been in the city
Europe. It seems funny that the 1 have seen ono judge reek surcease
parvenus of Canada and America from sorrow by drinking Scotch
I find many strange things upon n|wayg fly to Europe to spend their with his beefsteak, aud another so
my travels in tbe far west. So far roll wht.n here in British Columbia tenderly sensitive that he hael to
in British Columbia I have never the grandC3t scenery on earth is eat alone lest the jarring of the
seen the servants line upjor tips-��� i)ed in a\most unending heaps, table by another occupant vu nld
from the departing guest like they with gCarcely a blotch of paint upon upset his dignity and give his -no-
do in Europe, and at the Stmthcona Jt i bear a great deal about poker tism an attack of judicial colly-
where I am stopping the landlord around here ami it ^^ a popular wabbles.
never charges anything for his invegtment. i imVe a notion to buv This year is in the shank ami the
smile, and at breakfast oranges are a few gharefi for pa a8 a Christmas talk is about the boom in thc spring,
free. You know in the hotels of prcgent. Perhaps ma would like The spring tioom seems to lie in-
Paris they would charge a tourist ^me am, the gir,g You might digenous to this wonderful country,
about 40 cents for ati orange. This cab*e mo if >ou think it advisable It is sired by hope ind damned
is a funny town. The people start amj j wjjj KC|uj FOme ^her home everv summer. There is a big one
a new daily paper about every other |n ti|ne for thp |,0u(javs. The insight just now, and if ma will
clay. They are very religious, bow- pargon tel,8 me that a (jollar in. M%ni\ mt wnne white HhirtH t wiU
ing to Christ aud Houston in aliout vcgte,i |��� ^faf. 0ften makea a profit endeavor to stay here until I *ee it.
equal numbers, although neither 0f one b.indred fold, and that even I am just dying lo see a boom, it
deities have been in town for some tho am,ientg forked upon it with must lie real nice to se��o the street*
time. The mam Houston temple favor as Noah hael on the deck of of Nelson littered with gold a la
was invaded recently by the sheriff hig Ark a pair of everything, ex- New Jerusalem, and not a soul
who Tuck everything in sight but t pockg aml amw����. However, crving hard times. To see the tint
bad to see a U atermau before the of courMf if you think the folks of*joy upon every fuee, and to hear
altar was stnptped by sacriligious wouW not Uko p^,., as a gift at tlte clink of gold aa it rolls into the
hands. While this commercta[\%hh festive stage of the year let me city from mine, forest, ranch and
vandalism was going on some of know an(| { wi��� hl|||t wmu.tbing tourist will indeed be a pleasure to
the publicans and sinners are said llK)n> unjqUe and acceptable. There witness, aud worth being here to
to have shouted in a manner tliat are no oU1 niing m% |iere that I can sen-. Thev do have some real bard
was slightly irreverent to the lo*t 8eml nomfS| though if I were in times out we* for I read tbe other
&0"* Alberta I might  lie able to express day of how tough the time*s were
I met Baron Munchausen here you the Conservative party, or a net during the first winter of Wallace,
the other day, and am told that he 0f gophers. Thc gopher is a species Idaho. When the snow shut that
has large interests in various parts of pearl found upon tbe prairie*, and town in there were seven saloons
of the country, and the Baron sajs highly prized by all fortunate in the camp and only one fifty cent
that in company with a man by the enough to secure one. piece of money.    This single* coin
I leave the country.
I will probably write again in a
few days anel scnel tin* gophers. I
bave wired Hob Ed warels at Calgary
to look mc up a nice set so that I
can engrave your dear names em
though the name seems so deucedly itceists 8100 to spit on Bakei wtreet
queer; but they have such strange while four miles awav the ranchers
names and phrases out here. I will bless you to spiton their land,
often wonder what the people mean iu fact I am told that mauv ranch-
by the word '���hook'' from the way , rg irrigate their land in this way
thev say it.    It must mean some jn  this province.    Game is often
kind of a bird. i njgil? anu�� |��� Victoria I saw millions ��their back.    In the interim lie good
At a pink tea the other after- in the cheese.    By wire Victoria is  Donald, ancl you will seldom have
noon 1 wa�� introduced to the Rev.  only a second from Nelson, but by [the belliako.    Your brother,
James Neelanche who informs tne automobile  it is impossible, owing
that about 200 miles from Nelson to tbe uneven nature of the roads,
there is a large Indian village call- j Many   of   the   inhabitants of the
ed Spokane.    It appears that dur-1 upper   country   dream   that some
ing what is called the early days
the savages from Spokane raided
British Columbia and secured vast
day, after an election, they will goi
to Victoria and fumble the nuggets'
in the government sack.  There are
treasures  of   wealth.     With this probably   about   7000   peoplo   in
money they have built several large
tepees in Spo-Can, as tbey call it,
and have gone with their families
Nelson wbo think that they could
run this country better than Dick
McBride.   They no doubt could as
Sharp & Irvine
Real KaUitc and  Insurance AKcnta
NELSON. B. C. LowfiftY's claiM
��� ������
A ii'
The Primrose Path.
i "Be good aud you will be lonesome," is the manner in which
Mirk Twain signs himself with
considerable pathos. And even in
that mythical old tale of the Garden
the man and the woman grew
weary of tho monotony of perfection, and as history, so-called, only
gives us facts, not feelings, who
can say that the lady and gentleman in the case did not gaily kick
over tho tracas of Paradise and the
proprieties with malice prepense
and exceeding great joy? Eden
was ideal���but it must have been
aw ful dull. It had all the loveliness of Arcadia; its sun-kissed
beauty thrilled with the song of
birds, its green, misty aisles, heavy
with the incense of a thousand
flowers, its laughing streams flashing sweet challenges at the dew
drops hanging like angel's tears on
the fronds of maiden hair fern.
But man is clay and in Eve's
fairness, au natural, there was a
rather wearying .sameness���iu her
costuin<*s ancl in her conversation
there was so little variety.
Ancl Eve herself must have fountl
little pleasure in reigning without
rivals, and doubt Jess thought her
brain ancl beauty rather wasted on
the animal creation of one man.
So what more natural, with an
obliging Deity provided���or permitted, whichever vou prefer���the
snake and open sesame, that thoy
should be embraced with avidity
and the happy couplo exchange tlte
rather tame pleasures of a moral
existance for t.\**S^Mwf"8fi i-jr. ts"of
the world, the flesh and the devil.
Of course the angel and the flaming sword helped out the spectacular effect and were invaluable to
Dante and Milton; but judging the
due by their descendants, it might
be safely surmised that the delights
ahead, not the danger behind, gave
wings to their feet.
Somebody says, somewhere, "We
may owe our solid happiness to the
good, but we owe life's color ancl
variety and excitement to tbe
wicked; let us never underrate
them." Tbat is unorthodox, but
also undeniable. Tho dew-drops
of Paradise were picturesques, but
the glinting beads of Pomeroy Sec
more palatable. The songs of
birds soothes to slumber, but one
would rather steep heart and soul
in the exquisite paiu of Mascagni's
"Intermezzo."      To  enjoy,   one
must have suffered���extreme necessitates extreme, the stillness and
peace of "tideless calm" pall. Man
needs the storm and splendor of
life in its fullest and broadest to
really live. And to "be good" is
synonymons with unutterable monotony. This is not proper, and according to the eternal fitness of
things, but it is so just the same.
It is an accepted fact that woman always loves the prodical instead of the good young man who
stays home when there is no Y. M.
C. A. meeting. Theg. y. m. desn't
look on the wine when it is red nor
play battledore and shuttlecock
with the ten commandments; he
comes to her immaculate and innocent���and she promptly labels him
imbecile and inane, while sbe
gathers the prodigal into her forgiving arms, wipes out his tears and
his checkered career with one sweep
of her dainty handkerchief and
tearfully tells him that while the
lamp holds out to burn the lowliest
sinner (of his sex) may return, and
that she (and her eyes shino with
a holy light)���sbe will reform him.
She never does, but that does
not disturb her self-confidence i;i
the least. Doubtless the gentler
sex has made up its mind that the
existing minority of the genus man
will not be repeated in the next
world, which accounts in part for
its extreme solicitude regarding his
And man? Is it the good woman
whom he really loves? History and
romance, fact and fictiou, today
and a ceutury ago���do you find the
good womau really loved? By her
children, by her friends, by her dependents, she is loved and reverenced as something holy. But as
ho wearied of Paradise so does man
weary of Perfection, and it is not
the good woman whom man really
She is sacred in his eyes as the
shrined Mater Dolorosa and he
gives her an affection tideless and
steadfast, perhaps; "but it is not
for good women men have fought
battles, given their lives and starved their souls."
Octavia bore the sacred name of
wife, but the woman of the Nile
carried in her breast the heart of
Anthony. The "lily maid of As-
tolat" poured out her pure love,
with her life���unheeded. Antoinette was worshipped though a
wanton, while England's noblest
queen, a neglected wife, bears tbe
bitterness of a whole world's pity.
"Be good and you will be lonesome"���and there is bitter truth
under the froth of jest. The good,
in the strict sense of the word, are
so uninteresting. Their lives are
iron-bound and the mile-stones in a
rigid line along a rigid highway.
Tn judging their kind, their view is
narrow and their verdict pitiless,
because they cannot understand
lives less coldly calculated than
their own. They are monotonous
because there is no unexpectedness in their natures���they cannot
understand the sudden heat-lighting of tlie human Passions wlien
man wages battle with the elements, when fire ancl storm blind
and madden, and in the awful lull
that follows he gazes, ashen-faced,
in the depths of his own bared soul.
They are good, because in their
veins run water. But the soul that
is broad ancl human, that Jias
known the ecstacy of the heights
and the hideous suffering of a mental Tartarus, that has lived and
laughed and wept and cursed, that
has hoped and despaired and conquered and risen, Phoenix-like,
from the ashes ancl ruins, and faces
the imdutable sphinx of the Beyond
with a like immutability that dis-
tains to either complain or explain,
that has suffered and is strong and
is silent and waits, that soul is not
good. But it is something better���
is grand.
John Hutchison & Co.
East  Kootenay  Timber, Farming
and Coal Lands.
Is convenient to all depots, telegraph offices and banks in the
city. Special attention paid to
tourists, commercial and otherwise. The cuisine is excellent,
and all guests receive courteous
attention. Touch the wire when
you want rooms reserved.
Bojfliirrt) % Rollins, Proprietor* 6
The Same Old Story
Of Creed and Slave, ks ^3
The folly of belonging to a church j
and becoming a slave to dogma is)
plainly seen by thinking people who
read the daily newspapers.    Thei
other day in Quebec a bishop de-\
nounced* the great actress, Sarah
Barnhardt, antl her plays,  and no
doubt   many   of his awe-stricken
hearers believed the hot air thrown
at them  from the pulpit.    'Twas
ever thus.    The church and the Ut
bishops have ever sought to crush
genius, even  in  their own line of
business.    Most bishops are insane
with the power given them by the
people, and incapable or unwilling
to instruct   tbe   people   from the
standpoint of reason.    Their profession has a tendency   to make
tbem tyrannical, anel imagine that
they are earthly gods whom all
should bow to in meek submission,
mingled  with  tears,  prayers ancl
lamentations.     Secure in a profession created for tbem by  fear and
superstition, and satiated with the
cream of material things they ape
the old bible god, and threaten the
slaves of fear, myths and theologic
fog with dire consequences if they
do not come to Jesus over the route
he has mapped out.    At this late
day when science bas taught us so
much it is pitiful  to see ho many
poor souls quaking in  tbeir boots
because dictatoiial.   pompous and
egotistical    individuals   have   tbe
nerve to tell others bow they should
live.    When the world thinks more
bishops will grew thin.
In  Nebraska,   not long ago,   a
number of chinch  people attended
tbe wedding of a mau  who bad a
divorced   wife   living,   and   their
bishop excommunicated the entire
bunch,   shutting   tbem   out from
heaven   as   it   were, and  leaving
them to shiver in  the cold shades
of theological ostracism, probably
until they cry aloud for holy water
and come   a-running   with   their
hands filled with gold pleading for
merey.   Then the kind bishop will
once again take tbem into the fold
and bless their lives with serenity.
To people who really believe in this
kiud of religion the terror of excommunication must  strike their
hearts like a shock from hell, and
a bishop must be cruel and insane
who would inflict such punishment.
To a man free from the hypnotism
of such religion it looks like a
clever bunco scheme to raise money
or a bold bluff to enforce cringing
obedience to a creed. If such a
thing was done in the business world tbe perpetrator of it
would probably do time in a building with bars on tho windows.
People under the spell of religion
will do things just as ridiculous as
those under the influence of a mes-
The Nebraska bishop cut off bis
pe*ople from tbe rites of his ereenl
because bis church does not sanction
divorce, or anything pertaining to
it, preferring that its adherents
live in marital misery rather than
bave thc bonds severed when matrimonial harmony ceases to exist.
Such teaching antl such a law is
contrary to nature, harmony and
the beat interests of the human
race, lt is laid down ami enforced
bv men wbo never marry, and who
know nothing about the misery of
living with one ofthe opposite sex
when love is de*��d in one or both.
Nothing is more disastrous to peace
and happiness than a loveless or
incompatible matrimonial alliance.
It breeds suicide, murder and all
tbe horrors that come from sueh an
unnatural state of living, and (Jenl
never intended that any e��f the
creatures on this earth should live
in misery, and if thev choose to do
* <e>
so they bave themselves ami false
teachers to blame for lieing greater
fools than the animals of the lower
Marriage should lie rendered
more difficult and the -aid of science
called in to determine who tdiould
marry; but divorce should ever Ik*
easy and inexpensive in order that
misfits can lie corrected and human
misery reduced to a minimum.
When people of this earth grow
more advanced in mentality they
will be guided by science and common sense in all affairs of life, and
chaps liko the Nebraska bishop will
[be laughed at when they issue
idiotic pastorals about how people
shall conduct themselves socially
or otherwise.
to be doing very well in Canada.
He is building a$200,000 residence,
and is importing the buff bricks
from New York, as no doubt
Canadian bricks are not good
enough for Cliffy. His career is a
sample of what a man cau do when
he gets into Canadian politics. No
wonder so many gratters struggle
to get into oflice where tbey ean
fill their pockets from tbe public
George Horton has a cigar called
the Ark although Noah had none
of them with him when he pulled
out for Mount Ararat during the
great rain. None of the Ark e*igars
are sold in the Holy Land, but you
can see them smoke all over Western Canada.
When we watch the mad rush
made by some people to Start newspapers where they are not needed
we are moved to remark that a
paper wall often stand* between
insanity and something that is not
At last tbe glmst has disappeared
from the Christinas books f��>r
children. We would not Ih* surprised, now that the worlel is moving in thought, to finel the ghost
ere long eliminated from our religion.
This is aliout the time when The*
Croat Cinch in Fernie commences
to bunt for piehatd jackasses to
represent it in the city couucii.
Ignorant and disbondst people*
can always Ik* gold-bricked.
A Tip to Purchasers
When vou arc buying K" wh- re- thc
dealer make* a qpdalty ol the line
vou wish and you will nut emiy ^d
better good*, hut you will be- be -iter
plca*eel  in nwny ways aftcrw.ink
When vou want CONFECTIONBRV go
to PoinfJI ond he will treat you right
The Hotel Slocan
Even  if   Cliffy   Sifton   did get
caught at the back door he seems
Is the leading hotel of the city
Mountain trout and game dinners a specialty.    Kootns
reserved by telegraph.
HUC.H NIVEN, Proprietor. tOWfiBV'8 CLAIM
-���b^,!,,���i,   ���^*M,li,Ml.��� ia*�� .    ��� i  ...i.
The Holy Land.
Talking about the Holy Land J.
T. Wilkinson says that he would
not go back there for all the wealth
in B. C. Wings must have had a
rough time in Jerusalem. He says
that the story in the bible about
the thieves and Jericho is absolutely true, for the day thut he bathed
his feet in the mud of Jordan a
tourist had been murdered for tbe
donkey lie was riding. It is necessary to have a guide when you go
out of Jerusalem to see the sights
of Jericho, and the thieves wno
run the livery barn charge $35 for
two days hire of one of their rigs.
From what Wings says wo would
advise all people to stay away from
Jerusalem and the Holy Land. It
is the home of thugs, thieves, holdups, sand baggers and murderers,
antl the Christian religion is less
thought of there than any placo in
the world. It is the dream of
everv student of divinity and the
9? *��
theologic B. 8. to go to tho Holy
Land ancl feast his eyes upon the
old ruins, antl sit in tho places that
Jesus touched in tho long ago. if
he does, when he comes back from
that Gehenna of myths, fables,
miracles and superstition he will
probably be haunted with vermin,
and financially skinned to a vanishing point. So stay away from
Jerusalem. It is the cesspool of
civilization, and its inhabitants are
like unto the maggots that crawl
iu tombs and suck nonrisment from
the dead.
The Bright Side.
There is good in everything. A
man may be ever so bad and still
have good teeth.
The skinnest pig that ever rooted
in the ground will make good soap
greese. The toughest steak can be
ground up in a meat grinder, disguised with spices and things and
made into mince pies.
Even dyspepsia, that awful curse
of humanity, has its light side. It
saves grub.
The man who has two mothers-
in-law may take heart of hope, for
he slight have had three or four or
half a dozen.
The man who is alive should be
thankful he is not dead, and the
dead should be thankful they don't
have to pay rent for their tombs.
Let the fat man rejoice that he
is not fatter tban he is, and tbe
thin man sing because he has skin
and bones left.
If it rains, be glad tbe rain isn't
bricks. Show your teeth most of
the time and you will soon find
life one long jag of joy.���The
Maple Svrup Legend
Maple syrup was discovered by a
woman's carelessness, so the legend
Once on a time���springtime, long
ago���a squaw was cooking venison
for her husband.
There were no game laws those
Whilo the fire burned and the
meat cooked the squaw mused.
She awoke to find the meat on
Rushing to a dripping maple tree
near by, she seized a moccasin,
filled it with tho dripping juice of
the tree and threw it on the burning meat.
The result was a cake of pure
maple sugar.
The husband ate and howled for
Trying to provide she discovered
maple syrup.
That was once on a time���spring
time, long ago���before brown
sugar was so cheap.���Retailers'
The Japanese believe more in
fidelity of the mind than they do in
chastity of the body. They also
fail to see anything indecent or obscene in nature, and in consequence
both sexes go in swimming together
without any clothing between them
and tho vision of each other. A
Christian missionary once lectured
a bunch of brownies upon the horrible sin of the sexes bathing together without clothing. The next
day the Japs reformed. A bamboo
pole was strung across tbe pond,
and on each side of it tho opposite
sex bathed, without any covering as
usual. The poor Jap! He cannot
become a prude.
We do not believe in monopoly.
The Lord's Day Alliance has no
right to take Sunday away from the
people and give it to the parsons.
If the church cannot do business
without clamoring for a monopoly
it should disappear gracefully into
the fog of its own creation and allow the people to live in peace and
liberty.   The human race has beeu
persecuted long enough by the insane ideas of cranks about Sunday
and the so-called glory of God.
Susan B. Anthony was a great
advocate of woman's rights. She
was a tall woman, much resembling
an upended rail. Speaking to a
Kansas audience one day upon her
favorite mania, she shouted: " Women must have equal rights with
men. We must give them tit for
tat." Sol Miller came out in his
paper next day and said: "Alright,
Susan, we'll trade. You can have
our tat." Miller must have been
a humorist.
Every reader of this journal can
at least get one subscriber for it,
and by so doing help the grand
One copy of Float will be sent to
any address for 10 cents. Send
your stamps or coin to this office.
If silver climbs a little higher
Gabriel will soon be blowing his
horn in the Slocan.
Dyspepsia can be cured by living
upon two bits a day, and earning
the price.
Drink wine and the world butts
in. Drink water, and you drLik
Rossland was blown up at home
a few days ago.
��� I**--*  ��� ��� ������    -���-- --   ���   -  *
The McDonald-
Simpson Co.
Wholesale Commission Merchants &
Manufacturers' Agents.
The Lumsden Roller Mills
The Wapella Roller Mills
Lever Brothers "Sunlight Soap"
Dalton Brothers 'Dish-towel" Soap
The Vogel Packing Co.
The Baltimore Lime M'f'g Co.
The Manitoba Canning Co.
The W. & R. Jacob Co., Ud.,
Biscuit Manufacturers
The Guelph Foundry Co., Ud.
The "Armur" Co., Ud.
The Moyie Mill & Lumber Co.
The Hygiene Kola Wine Co.
Fruit and Produce of all kinds
Correspondence Solicited.
P. 0. Box 363. Calgary, Alta.
MM^'iLMH���.      .11 Hii
.afc r
Labor and thc Saloons
Bv a Wbcorisin Editor.    ^
In my opinion the laboring man
has ouiv himself to iiiame for manv
II *
if not tlie most of the hardships of
whieh he cnnqittuus. Statistics
show that ii. the "Tnited fkates ia^i
year more thai! one thousand million dollars wa^ squandered for tieer
and otbeT intoxicating ligurs. One
Milwaukee brewery claim}- tisat it
turned out during that time more
tban one mill ion barrel of bee*
and several million bottle* of the
same. A St Louis tore wen- makes
an almost ide.ntical claim Bor ite
output. Tiie ��re��ter parr of thi-
beer was bought by ��s*calh��d labor
ing men. although not one of then
could afiurd to spend any of hi-
earning in thu- manner. Tin*}
were mating their monev upon ai
article  which  wa*  not imh  of no
earthly tteiieiit to Them, but on the
contrary was an injur} and a curae.
We are assured   that about niiie-
tenths   of   the   crime*-   committed
have their  origin   iii liqueir drink
iug.   and   our insane asylum*- and
prisons  are  full of  tlie victims 09
thi*- great   evil.    If   the   average
workmgmaii who is denouncing the
tvranv ol capita! would eu! out hir
beer drinking  he migln heroine a
capitalist   himself,   tint   he wil. de
nothing of the kind.    He jv  tort to
gratify hi.-  appetite nnd flaroiikrtP
his  nerves   with alcohol    Instead
of being tiie slave   of  oanitai be is
tiie frilling boudmai) of the saloon-
keejier,  toiling  ali day w shop or
facte rn-and at   night bringing Ins
���earnings te tie man who has ban
waiting behind hi* iar in kue shin
sleeve? for the Herb whom he knows
will be sure te. come in after supper
to   hand   over   tlieir wage*, even
though   tbeir   families   mav  iaok
bread.   More tban turn, if if is proposed to phut- an adequate tax up-
on tiie iirewer or tin saioomst it is
tbe laboring mat who lights tooth
and nail to prevent such legislation
At this very moment dowi; in 3ihi��-
oie  a   clergyman   is   engaged   in
prosecuting   saioouists   who  have
been selling liquor to minors and
otherwise violating the laws then
had promised to obey.    Instead of
lieing upheld  and  -assisted il his
righteous   work   he   i*   receiving
letters threatening  his lib   and it
will not be surprising if be is assae-
I        -LJI-        i*-f mJB (******��� kM       **W
inated on tlie street or his house
tdown up with dy nam ite, just as
haj been tbe case iu similar instances, tii is vioietice always being
tiie act of laboring men who sympathise with the oppressed and
downtrodden liquor seller. It n
as much a* any man s life is worth
to in ant wav interfere or even to
* -a
advem*.} criticise tbe liquor traffic
While J wa* conducting Tne Inde-
penAaal    Mr.   O'&ciliy   got   drunk
and su drowned   bv   falling frean
a bridge into the \m\ . In chmuie-
iiugr the event 1 took w*aastoii tc
h��v that if saioon-k-efjmrs wen not
able to do a satisf scurry bussm****-
witttout selling to habtua. d-ui.fc*
tirdr and minors it showed thai
there were too many persouf en-
pa^ed in tio trafte and tbat the
obvious rented} was hr Am MUl'fUMB
to retire ami t*nier into aonit- other
business*. Too might Huppose thai
��� reasonable a proposition a*- this
would tie universal!} appnofj, but
it was resented in twa uf tbe mra;
saloon keeper* who manih*sted
then dtsapprova to\ withdrawing
tlnii name's from our subscription
list, li. other words then ����ovroCted
the AplwSttl O famWftm le O^SMi
ai; Htt^erse- opinioi. eonremm; tio
hUxihj ol liquor to a tmuir.tius
Jdrunkarti unci th**} would havt
ruined tb< paj*r had the} |MMWf**^ie<l
tiie power, bin a- n tiapm*ofd !!h*^
wen ��)ili ti�� injure it lo tie extent
of only three cents vvA. p*��r we*f*i
tie daniafr* did not ciimpe) io* V>
suspend pubHoatiffn, And it ��-. ar
institutioii like this thai the weirk
iii^r man fight* for and esup^irt-s
with his earnings to tite extent er
more tban ont titousand millions a
And this is only one of mats}
ways in wbirth the labor!iig mat
impoverishes himself, and lit would
do still more if he had the power.
It tlte Bryan nampaign about acvei.
million voters���most eif tbem worklngmen���cast then: ballon- for free
silver, in spite of thf* faet known to
every intelligent per?eon that had
tins policy prevailed it would have
resulted in our financial rum. Hut
tiie*} were Itemoprai**., and tho\
were bound to voter for the Ih��mo
ieratic nominee regard)*** of result*.
Consider alst�� the folK of theaf men
bnrdetiing thenmlvets with the Rnt>.
jiort of wives aud childrci wi^J
they aire hardly able to nfun^[L
tUemsietives in a decent mauum
lustead of waiting until thev i,uvt.
aocumuiated cnougi means u ,Uh.
tify them in wwwij 1114, ti��-\ .'Uh1j
iuui matrimony aud tbeti i^n Ui
sftawn ciuidren upon the w,,��-���(]
where they are not vante-t. tlie
average murkiitgmai V fauiih r..I}.
erallv lieiug in an inverse rati' i()
his ability to provid*������ ftr them Viid
then, imvmp manulaetured tt Urw
numimr of t'hiidren he impudeutl^
aesumt* that 11 it tie- tinr- ;. u^
t:apt'ta!ist to p&\ him Hufticjeail \
iarge wage* tt* ���**upp-?r; uv ;l- ,,;
On tie IHth o! N"v*��noi'- ttot
Qhionjli K��!*ird-Uierifcit! priuusd tba
" T*uabie aftr> a kmmj ttntt-
gie te- longer nnoutaii bif
UHUih of une mtitheriei*��e> -.-,.,
Htlieha- Bma^i a iiuii-ju-m: lab-
ore?, apjw-mreii wilh eighl ni tbe
ebildren, the eoi*��si o! wiion *��� .:
years oiii. in *3toi|re liao* 1 court
v-pst-e^da} and pioad -. n..o al me
children l��e adnpfed am o..itl n
one boin* v   *   Um lathw   nii:
bve-atXti 8iWH> r-ireej  l'*\ avenut
had kept tat-  nbUdrvi    nm    fate
inrurred   tn   ins wit- ��  bai     1 Mi
ohmhmI hi* nxHjH nl I    ���   pa -im
tf> Iwgariintiieetl.
Ben n* h mat wie t- abb 1 Md
only a dollar aoti a hall a dat v in
not inert*)} aaddirM- iiuu*- v . h
Will lull wbo eomjM'i* htv gi ni
oui ehildren no! :i--jiii��*e hi ^ai k
then; but mere!} tf* grul 1 IM ��-��i��*
ma' passton*> utiti * tmr������i rean
lie iia^ unit o: tti*'u. an. tho '**-
mg himself utmbte li   o B   ���'*
tu-o*- ttieit   ov*   It   *,    :..��    :
st 1 lotion,      v ������!��;. ��}     ne��;      a uc
wbetbfn he evet m*r*>   ��o '     '   :"11
���C'h;:.       And sueh  MMMM a*    ' :* **"'
ronimon      One  of   n��}   neigh tie*
has U\u rhiklreu.   alihougi  i��'  !�����
never  yet   i**mn  able   te   earj WH
dtiilars   a da\   and   nevsi   ���      '*
The !.��� ; be  t*an do  ts   ��'    '��� ���"-���   M
Irroeid   from  starving nm   ' ��    ,lf
and yet to -keeps rigtu ����i  nianulae-
turmr mort       ^oi long ag'     *'
rmnpanied Mr. Itruet/e- <u 1 oar
rtllliUjh the nortliern town    i�� mJI
Hari^sir   we   visited a bou*m  wiiflW
there were Uortner ttbildrei.  ����<
would not have ffiveii  tint ren' ,"'
all   tlie   elotlnng   won    i"    WJ*J
vtmlighten and their MJW*
ts wa- written all over th< t'"<,IP
ts** Then did nol appea' ��' IH
able even U�� buv soap  i<" ��,,,; ������
- ���
were the children unwashed but
the house and everything else was
foul with dirt. Undoubtedly these
children received no schooling, for
in their ragged attire they were unpresentable, and consequently they
will be compelled to grow up in
ignorance, marrying and spawning
infants upon the world just as their
parents have done. I consider it a
crime to thus breed children for
whom there is no earthly use, ancl
upon whom existence is forced only
that parents may gratify their
beastly passions, for we know that
if only those children are born who
aro really desired this world's population would lie greatly less than it
now in.    A recent writer says;���
"I will not go into such a vexed
que*ston as the French theory with
re*garel to the limitation of the population; suffice it here to say that it
is   grounded���whether    right   or
wreing���on   a   great   and   solemn
sense of the  responsibility of parenthood.    No true, honest, honorable   Frenchman or Frenchwoman
thinks it justifiable to firing children into the world without having
a fair certainty that these children
will have their chance of a happy
and prosperous life.  For a Frenchman  to leave a daughter, brought
up  in  comfort ancl  even luxury,
without means and   the   slave of
destiny would be a crime which he
would regard  as alim at the worst
of sins.    1 have heart! an Irish woman who had lived nearly  all her
than two millions who are always
on the verge of starvation. But in
spite of this these same hungry
wretches continue to breed others
whom they know will only come
into the world to suffer and die like
themselves for lack of food.
If our so called "laboring man"
would consider this matter and apply the remedy that is in bis own
hands he could soon so much improve his condition that he would
be the master of the situation, because he would presently
become a capitalist himself. But
so long as he annually squanders a
thousand millions for liquors, ancl
burdens himself with a family
which he is unable to support and
with children whom he does not
want, he has none but himself to
blame if he continues to be a hewer
eif wooel and a drawer of water for
There is little doubt but what
the vermiform .appendix is of use in
the human body. Nat ure as a rule
does not make amendments. Just
the particular use of the appendix
we may not know at the present
time, but long observation proves
that none who are operated upon
for its removal practically ever
fully ree*over, and have somo weakness for the balance of tlieir days,
even where they rely upon rational
physicians after mutilation. With
the appendix gone  no one can be
life in France, say���in good-hum-' put into a state of perfect health
oreel exaggeration���that a French- whieh seems ample proof that it is
man could Is* tempted to almost ,,f som(�� value to the human body.
any crime to leave his daughter a Fortunately the fad for operations
proper'dot'" is passing away,  but the doctors
Would it not be a good thing for certainly have worked full shifts
mankind if this sense* of responsi- v hen they had the opportunity.
bility were universally felt? This Xhe cutting mania is prevalent
earth's population would be much with many physicians, especially
smaller than it now is, but would when the cash price per cut is high,
not those who did exist be* enough if a person 1ms sufficient vitality
happier to compensate for the elif- to stand an operation for appendi-
ference in me e numbers? At this citis* they have sufficient to get
very moment the journals tell us well without the operation. Ap-
that in Russia a famine is inunin- pendicitis is mainly caused by In-
ent jn Which fifteen million persons digestion and impaction brought
are involved, and we know that in Upon by wrong habits of living,
some parts of that country there isi Correct wrong habits of living and
great suffering and many deaths; you will never kuow that you have
through lack of food. Only about an appendix.
a dozen years ago we were sending
ship-loads of flour and other foodstuffs to Russia to feed her starving
jieople, and more recently we were
doing the same thing for the famine
stricken people of India, where we
are assured that there are more
dians were behind the age owing to
the undue influence of the clergy*
The great actress spoke the truth
aud took her egg bath with tbe
best of grace. Montreal is gaining
an unenviable reputation through
the rudeness of its hoodlums to
those brave or indiscreet enough to
express themselves freely in that
province. This comes through the
ignorance of the masses and Quebec is sorely in nee 1 of more school
masters and fewer priests. The
church seeks to hole! the cinch over
the people anel this can only be
done by keeping them in ignorance
The pea-soupers should take a lesson from their mother coun try and
curtail the power of the clergy.
Ntit only has the church rejected
the greater portion of Christ's
teachings and altered tho remain-
<h*r, but' finding his teachings insufficient to wholly enslave mankind and engreiss power and profit,
she has set up doctrines and customs utterly opposed to them. A
salaried ministry, the Christian
Sabbath, the control of the state���
these and many other things taught
and practiced by the church were
condemned by Christ.���Remsburg.
The Nelson Daily News will issue
its usual special edition on December 31st, devoted to the annual review of the raining industry in this
province. It is a number of that
valuable journal that should be
spreatl broadcast throughout tha
world. Buy a bunch and send
them to your friends.
Blue Prise, Henry Vane, Oilumliim anel
Havana Ark rig;?.��� are Union cigar.-, made
liy W. P. Kilbonrne <V Co , Winnipeg, und sold
o.i the road by Oeorgo Horton.
IN   io AND 20 ACRE
For sale on easy terms.
Sarah Bernhardt and her company of actors were pelted with
aged eggs in Montreal by a band of
hood lu ins. Local papers had printed an interview with Sarah in
which she said that French Caua-
J. E. ANNABLE, Nelson, B. C.
15 year's experience in coal mines of
B. C.   Reports furnished on coal
Bgmam********* r
Labor and thc Saloons
Bv ci Wiscoiisin Editor.    ^
In my opinion the laboring man
has only himself to blame for many
if not the most of the hardships of
whicli   he   complains.     Statistics
show that in the United States last
year more than one thousand million dollars was squandered for beer
and other intoxicating liqurs.   One
Milwaukee brewery claims that it
turned  out during that time more
than one million  barrels of beer
and several  million bottles of the*
same.    A St. Louis brewery makes
an almost identical  claim   f< r it-
output.    The greater part of this
beer was bought by so-called laboring men, although not oue of them
could afford  to spend any of his
earnings in  this   manner.     They
were wasting tlieir money upon an
article whicb was  not only of nei
earthly benefit to them, but on the
contrary was an injury and a curse.
We are assured that about nine-
tenths   of   the   crimes committed
bave tlieir origin  in liquor drink
iug,  and  our insane asylums ancl
prisons are full of the victims of
this great   evil.    If   the   average
workingman who is denouncing the
tyrany of capital would cut out his
beer drinking he might become a
capitalist  himself,   but he will do
nothing of the kind.    He pi������ fers to
gratify his appetite and stimulate
his  nerves   with alcohol,    instead
of being the slave  of capital he is
the willing bondman of the saloonkeeper,  toiling ail clay in shop olfactory and at  night bunging his
burdening themslves with the
port of wives and children when
they are hardly able to maintain
themselves iu a decent manner
Instead of waiting until they have
accumulated enough means to jus-
tify tbem in marrying, they rush
into matrimony ami then begin to
Hpawii children upon the world
where they are not wanted, the*
average workingman's family gen
erally lieing in an inverse ratio to
bin ability to provide for them. And
then, having manufactured * \iiv^.
n um Iter of children he Impudontly
��^e     ^ji    *~e
inated on the street or his house
blown up with dynamite, just as
has been tbe case in similar instances, this violence always being
the act of laboring men who sympathize with the oppressed ancl
downtrodden liquor seller. It is
as much as any man's life is worth
to in any way interfere or even to
adversely criticize tbe liquor traffic, assume* that it it the duty of tho
While I was conducting The Inele*- capitalist to pay htm sufficiently
pendent Mr. O'Reilly got drunk large wages to rapport lhe broott
and was drowned by falling from Oo the 18th of November the
a bridge into the liay. In chronic- (Ticago Record-1lerahl printed this
ling  the  event  1  took occasion to  item: ���
say that if saloon-keepers were not ��< Tnable after a long drug,
able to do a satisfactory business gb�� to longer maintain his
without selling to habitual drunk- family of nine motherless children,
ards ami minors it showed that Michael S&inyi. a Hungarian lab-
there were too many persons en-
gageel   in  the traffic, ami that the
obvious remedy was for the surplus years  old,   iu Judge Mack's court
yesterday and pleaded tint all the
children be adopted ami   placed in
orer.   appeared   with  eight of the*
children, the eldest of whom i* 13
to retire anel enter into scone other
business.    You might suppose that
so reasonable a proposition a** this j om�� home.       ��� ���  Tbe father, who
would be universally approved, but j live>s at No. 8."ssi f Srvcu Bay avenue,
it was resented by two of the local bad kept the children until debts
salexin   keepers,    who   rnanife-eted j incurred   in   his wife's last illness
their disapproval  by   withdrawing [caused hi* wages of  $ 1.50 per day
their names from  our subscription I to Iteg^ruisheed."
list.   In other words thev boycotted      Here is a man who is able to earn
the officebecaoee it dared to express! only a dollar ami a half a day who
an adverse opinion concerning the! not merely km Id lee himself with a
selling of liquor to a notorious1 wife but wbo ootnpel* ber to grind
drunkard, ami they would hav-al*tm| children, not pecans* ha wanta
mined the paper hael they po��se**cd j them but merely to gratify hi* '*�������*
the power, but as it happened they i m.4| rjaasioo*, until in thirteen years
he ha* niiu* of them, and then being himself unable to n*ed them he
turns them over to a charitable in-
were able to injure it to the extent
of only three COOti cieh |n*r week
the  damage*  did  not compel im to
earnings to the man who has been Isuspend publication. And it i-�� au
waiting behind his bar iu bis shirt i institution like this that the work-
beeves for the serfs whom he knows I ing man fights for and supports
will be sure to come in after supper j with his earnings to the extent of
to hand over their wages, even jmore than one thousand millions a
though   tbeir   families   may  lack'year.
bread. More than this, if it 13 proposed to place an adequate tax upon tbe brewer or the saloonist it is
And this is only ono of many
ways in which the lai mm ing man
impoverishes himself, aud be would
the laboring man who fight* texith |do still more if be had the power,
and nail to prevent such legislation.
At this very moment down in Illinois a clergyman ia engaged in
prosecuting saloonists who bave
been selling liquor to minors and
otherwise violating tbe laws they
had promised to obey. Instead of
being upheld and assisted iu his
righteous work he is receiving
letters threatening his life, antl it
will not be surprising if he is assas-
In the Bryan campaign about seven
million voters���most of them work-
ingmen���cast tlieir ballots for free
silver, in spite of the fact known to
every intelligent person that bad
this policy prevailed it would have
resulted in our financial ruin. Hut
they were Democrats, and they
were bound to vote for the Democratic nominee regardless of results.
Consider also the folly of these men
Ktitutiou. probe ��y not cenng
whether he e��ver see* any <>���* thetu
again. Ami such eases as thi-* are
common. One of my neighbors
ha* ten children, although be has
never yet lieeu able to earn two
dollars a day and never will '*
The best he e?an de> is |0 keep the
brood from starring and freezing,
and yet he keeps right em man n featuring more. Not long ago I accompanied Mr. Druet/er on a tour
through the northern town. In Egg
Harbor we visited a house where
there were thirteen children, and I
would not have given one tent f<>r
all the clothing worn by these
youngsters and their parents. 1 ov-
eity was written all over the prem-
ises. They did not appear to W
able even to buy soap? for do! only UMiWd claim
were the children uu washed but
the house and everything else was
foul with dirt. Undoubtedly tliese
children received no schooling, for
in their ragged attire they were unpresentable, and consequently they
will be compelled to grow up in
ignorance, marrying ancl spawning
infants upon the world just as their
parents bave done. I consider it a
crime to thus breed children for
whom there is no earthly use, ancl
upon whom existence is force* 1 only
that parents may gratify their
beastly passions, for we know that
if only those children are born who
are really desired this world's population would be greatly less than it
now is.    A recent writer says; ���
"I will not go into such a vexed
qucston as the French theory with
regard to the limitation of the population; suffice it here to say that it
is   grounded���whether    right   or
wrong���on   a   great   and   solemn
sense of the responsibility of parenthood.    No true, honest, honorable  Frenchman or Frenchwoman
thinks it justifiable to bring children into the world without having
a fair certainty that these children
will have their chance of a happy
and prosperous life. For a Frenchman  to leave a daughter, brought
up in  comfort  ancl  even luxury,
without means antl   the   slave of
destiny would be a crime which he
would regard  as aluu st the worst
of sins.    I have heard an Irish woman who had lived nearly  all her
than two millions who are always
on the verge of starvation. But in
spite of this these same hungry
wretches continue to breed others
whom they know will only come
into the world to suffer and die like
themselves for lack of food.
If our so-called "laboring man*'
would consider this matter and apply the remedy that is in his own
hands he could soon  so
prove his condition that he would
be the master of the situation, because he would presently
become a capitalist himself. But
so long as he annually squanders a
thousand millions for liquors, and
burdens himself with a family
which he is unable to support and
with children whom he does not
want, ho has none but himself to
blame if he continues to be a hewer
of wood and a drawer of water for
There is little doubt but what
the vermiform appendix is of use in
the human body. Nature as a rule
does not. make amendments. Just
the particular use of the appendix
we may not know at the present
time, but long observation proves
that mine who are operated upon
for its removal practically ever
fully recover, and have some weakness for the balance of tlieir days,
even where they rely upon rational
physicians after mutilation.    With
the appendix gone no one can be
life in France, say--in good-hum-' put into a state of perfect health
oretl exaggeration���that a French- which seems ample proof that it is
man could Ik* tempted to almost ���r somo value to the human body.
any crime to leave his daughter a Fortunately the fad for operations
proper 'dot.' " lis passing away,  but the doctors
Would it not he a good, thing for certainly  have' worked  full shifts
mankind if this sense* of responsi- when  they  had  the opportunity.
bility were  universally felt?   This The cutting   mania   is   prevalent
earth's population would be much  with  many  physicians,  especially
smaller than it  now is, but would when the cash price per cut is high. I
ntit those wbo tlitl exist be enough  if a person  has sufficient vitality!
happier to compensate for the dif- to stand an operation for appendi-
ference in me e numbers?    At this citis   they   have   sufficient to get
very   moment the journals tell us: well   without the operation.    Ap-
that in Russia a famine is imniin- pendicitis  is mainly caused by in-
ent in which fifteen million persons digestion  and impaction   brought
are involved, and we know that in  Up0n  by  wrong habits of living,
some parts of that country there is! Correct wrong habits of living and
great suffering  ancl  many deaths |y0u will never know that you have
through lack of food.    Only about an appendix.
a dozen years ago wo were sending' ^
ship-loads of Hour and other food-
stuffs to Russia to feed her starving
dians were behind the age owing to
the undue influence of the clergy.
The great actress spoke the truth
and took her egg bath with tbe
best of grace. Montreal is gaining
an unenviable reputation through
the rudeness of its hoodlums to
those brave or indiscreet enough to
express themselves freely in that
province. This comes through the
much im- ignorance of the masses and Quebec is sorely in nee 1 of more school
masters and fewer priests. The
church seeks to hold the cinch over
the people and this can only be
done by keeping them in ignorance
The pea-soupers should take a lesson from their mother country and
curtail the power of the clergy.
Not only* has the church rejected
the greater portion of Christ's
teachings and altered tho remainder, but' finding his teachings insufficient to wholly enslave mankind and engross power and profit,
she has set up doctrines and customs utterly opposed to them. A
salaried ministry, the Christian
Sabbath, the control of the state���
these and many other things taught
and practiced by the church were
condemned by Christ.���Remsburg.
The Nelson Daily News will issue
its usual special edition on December 31st, devoted to the annual review of the raining industry in this
province. It is a number of that
valuable journal that should be
spread broadcast throughout tha
world. Buy a bunch and send
them to your friends.
Blue I'rize, Henry Vane, Columbus and
Havana Ark Cigar* are Union cigar***, made
by \V. P. Kilbotirne 4- Co , Winnipeg, and sold
o.i the road by Ueorge Horton.
IN   io AND 20 ACRE
For sale on easy terms.
J. E. ANNABLE, Nelson, B. C.
people, and more recently we were
doing the same thing for the famine
stricken people of India, where we
are assured that there are more
Sarah Bernhardt and her company of actors were pelted witb
aged eggs in Montreal by a band of
hoodlums. Local papers had printed an interview with Sarah in
which she said that Freuch Caua-
15 year's experience in coal mines of
B. C.   Reports furnished on coal
.*w**w. 10
Caling and Drinking
Bv Lyman B. Speroj.
Somebody has defiued man as a
stomach. A member of a sewing
circle put- the question to another
"How do you manage to get along
with your husband?** The reply
was, "Feed the brute.'* Hunger
is a fundamental feeling from the
cradle to the grave, ancl its consideration is of the greatest importance, especially as we are living
under such artificial influences.
We call ourselves civilised, but we
are not vet rational creatines.
Why most a man eel? There
are four reasons: For growth, to
repair waste which results from our
various activities, to maintain
proper temperature���m*ar 100 de-
gnvs- ami t4> produce energy.
What shall a man eat? A hog,
bear, chicken, or man can eat almost anything that is vegetable.
We are as omnivorous as any ani-
mal known. Any thing organic
contains nntriant material. A
fence rail or cracker box contains
nutriment. Starving horses in the
armv will eat rails and dead tree*s.
An angleworm gets nutriment out
of the soil in whicli it lives. The
stuped le*aves of rhubarb are poisonous, but we cat the plant We
are lold that more nutriant flour
can Iv placed ou a five cent piece
than then* i�� nutriment in a whole
gallon of lager l*eer.
Then* are children born who cm-
not lie made to live on meat, while
there are some that cannot live
without it. Some cannot take
milk, while others cannot live
without it. Some persons are I-em
oarutveious and some vegetarian.
Hack iu 1869 then* was a child that
was poisoned by the taking of milk,
so it was led arrowroot and tapioca:
il oould not take milk until fifteen
years of age. In adult life he
flourishes on milk, but oould not
take it as a boy, some cannot eat
starchy food, but the conditions
change through life because of varying experiences Parents should
nv*l try to get their children to eal
what nature did not lit them to eat
What is one person's meat is another person's poison. aod a change
from one kind of food to another
-mono* be made rapidly .and safely.
In the same family children ofl-en
cannot eat the same kiud of food.
<^s      ^9     ^3
��^e   <-#   vj
One child craved and for a year
was fed on raw, scraped meat.
Gentlemen, eat what you please,
providing the thing you choose to
eat is reasonable in its general relationship. Those who prefer alcohol to something good to eat are
dammed up with abnormal appetites.
Some systems waste food and will
not make nutriment out of what
others will. The amount of food
taken should depend upon the ability of your digestive apparatus to
work it iuto good blood. Some
pe*ople eat twice as much asotherr.
select tbat whicli is reasonable; eat
slowly and chew the food thoroughly, then quit when you have eaten
enough. We waste our en<*rgie*
by eating exevssive amounts of food
that our systems do not require
and hate to labor to get rid of.
Tobacco d'jes no! aid digestion. Do
not believe it does, my dying
friend! Hy deadening tbe nervous
force it creates a sensation of rest,
but it does not anl digestion.
Get into the habit of resting after
your meals fifteen or thiity minutes
or an hour, so that the blood will
have time to flow to the stomach.
Take fifteen minute* to go to your
lunch after working your brain;
eat for thirty minute*, then rest
again fifteen minutes after, before
resuming work. After a hone has
eaten all it can hold aud is hitched
up it is started off slowly to give it
time t<> "empty isself,*' as they
Coffee is a narcotic and it damages* the liver as much as the^beer
docs tbat Germans take with tbeir
food as thev slowlv chew rye bread.
Kat as often is vou are hungrv.
One of the greatest men I ever
knew iu thi* country ate but once
a diy. at five in the mom iug. and
ttien he ate a whole hatful. Tbe
fix id was digestc*! iu five bourse,
leaving him free for action the balance of the tareuty-fonr, except
when he slept. As a rule, I think
eating three time* a clay is about
right for the average man, A college friend of mine come to weigh
'J-JO pound* in later life, and he
would touch but two meals p*e
per day. Ou two meals per
day,  I  m> sell would prefer to go
without a breakfast People differ;
it is a matter of individual peculiarity. Every man should be intelligent and -conscientious witb reference to himself. Do not follow
any fancy, fad or Macfadden. I
had a Macfadden dinner today my.
self and am alive yet. These health
culture estab) ish men ta are run in
tbe interests of their owners, as a
rule, so people need to do a little
thinking for themselves.
Many eat and drink and smoke
because others do. Worry causes
indigestion more than anything
else in thc world, as it cause* the
blood not to properly circulate.
The healthiest man ou earth is the
contented man. Life is worth living and the best way to live is the
best way. Catarrh is another name
for piggishn-ps*. Tbe Thanksgiving
dinner is where people often make
pigs of themselves for tbe glory of
God. We are a nation of gluttons,
so we are a nation of dyspeptics,
ancl because of dyspepsia w��* are a
nation of dopera. Kat like intelligent human beings, and the muscles
and brain will strengthen; you wil)
then enjoy life immensely.
Time** must still be hard in Roasland for we notice tbat a saloon in
that city is tr\ ing to raw* the wind
by giving away hot beans every
Three of the six great modern
scientists were surveyor*. That
profession is one of fact instead of
Plum podding is mighty and will
soon travail.
Asa rule love aud jealousy are
both 4ind.
C*a^te��-ccJr;* B* C
Is coamsMrat to all -JkrpcCs. trie
graph other* aad baaks ta thc
oty.   Special attratkra p��*d to
tottmta. -coaasB-rncial aad otber-
ana*,. The oaaeae �� ctxcrlJesL
aaol *11 graeat�� -re-oeta* enSJWWni
attestm. Vsmcb. the artre arfceo
vvxa araat rcvea rr*crw.i.
feMtftt�� &�����*. Prcfrtttw
��� -<*-.*��i����w<��M.'.i|i.i.��i<i.t<<ilniMii>i.-.ii.  .nm wi'ihi.mii   ni.m ..��,.��� LOWERY'S CLAIM
Only a JoKe.
We heard a good joke the other
day on a certain newspaper man
who lives about sixteen miles east
of llonbam, wbo was an  innocent
party to  the affair, consequently
there can't bo any harm in giving
it to our readers,    Tho said newspaper man was sitting in his oflice.
alone,  smoking,   when  he had occasion to use  the telephone.    He
arose, laid the cigar  he was smok-
ing in a chair  and   took clown the
receiver.     Just as he lifted the receiver a  friend  stepped   into  the*
olliee ancl started to sit down in the
chair.    Not realizing the* operator
could  hear  what he  was saying,
and  just as she was aliout. to say,
"Number please*?" in  her sweetest
tones, the said editor yelled: "Look
out there!  You'll burn your pants!"
Communication between him anel
central   was  at once cut eiff and
about half an   hour  later the manager called  and  demanded an explanation.      His  explanation   was
satisfactory   to   the   manager,   but
central refused to be be comforted.
���Bomham Favorite.
Amateur Reform.
The mission-workers on the East
Side frequently see the humorous
as well as thc* Sadder side eif life. A
man prominent in reform work recounts the experience of a certain
young wownan, new to tho tank,
wbo set about posting herself as to
conditions iu a neighborhood neir
Avenue A.
The ambitious missionary had
entered tin* house of an Irishwoman anel had made some preliminary inquiries, when she was
suddenly interrupt eel by the woman, who said;
"Say, youse is fresh at dis business, ain't youse?''
The amateur in mission work admitted blushingly such to be the
case, adding, "I have never visited
you before, Mrs. Muldoon."
"Thin," explained thc woman,
"I tell ye what to do. Ye sit
down in that chair there, ye read
me a short psalm, ye gives me
fifty chits, an' thin ye goes.' ���
Harper's Weekly.
Meanest or ah Grafters.
In the general uprising against
graft one of the meanest of all
the grafters escaped publicity���the
maker of adulterated food, says the
Spokane Press.
The secretary of agriculture says
the people are being cheated every
year out of more than a billion dollars through the substitution of
cheap stuff and poisonous stuff in
their daily food. Henry I. Dodge,
one of the best posted writers, says
it amounts to over two billions���
or 825 for each person in the United
States.    This grafter is���
A PeiiseiNEU.
The health of millions is affected
by his adulterated feiod. Disease
and death is traced directly to him.
And in myriad cases, where the
victim does not dream of the cause,
vitality is sapped ancl the seeds of
disturbance sown.    He is also���
A Swindler
He claims���whicli is not true���
that his aelulterated goods aro as
good as any. Taking him at liis
word ho has swindled his customer.
The customer has bought one thing,
the manufacturer has sold him another���and a cheaper.   He is also���
A Counterfeiter.
He puts false labels on his goods.
He does not blush to carefully
counterfeit the labels of well known
home and foreign brands. He puts
the "Pure Apple Jams'' label of a
famous community product on his
stuff which is an decoction of carrots anel seaweed. He takes the
coarse carp from the ponds of Illinois and makes of it the famous
pink salmon of the Columbia. This
ford adutator is���
A Le>w Lived Robber.
He robs the mother of a babe in
1 er mother's milk. He robs the
child of the candy it buys. He
sneaks into the humble kitchens of
the poor and filches their food,
liis crime is against the race. He
is baser than the horse thief. But���
He is Smart.
This prisoner, swindler, counterfeiter and common robber has not
only escaped the penitentiary and
the gallows, but for twenty-five
years he has prevented the senate
of tho United States from passing a
pure food bill. Oh, he is smart.
He robs peoplo of thei? health and
money every meal they eat and he
is still highly respectable.
"Thc blood-dyed vestments of tho
Redeemer are not waving iu triumph over the ramparts of sin aud
rebellion," but over the fortresses
of faith  float the white flags   of
truce.    The trumpets    no longer
sound for   battle,   but for parley.
The fires of hell have been put out,
and heaven itself is only a   dream.
The "eternal verities" bave changed to doubts.    The torch of inspiration, choked with ashes,   has lost
ita flame.    Thero  is  no  longer in
the church "a sound from   heaven
as of a rushing, mighty  wind;" no
"cloven tongues like as of fire;" no
"wondcis in  the  heaven  above,"
ancl "no signs in the earth beneath.
The miracles have faded away, and
the sceptre is passing from superstition    to   science���science,    the
only savior of maukind.��� Ingersoll
A'marricd Italian couple who
left their lodgings at Avelino without paying their rent because they
thought the house was haunted
have heen fined $100. The judge
ruled that modern science does not
recognize the existence  of ghosts.
Since the recent elections strangers feel like carrying a gun when
they travel through Alberta.
Dr. A. Milloy. Dentist
Aberdeeu Block,
Baker St., Nelson,  B. C.
Shops in all leading towns.   Contracts
solicited to supply armies and railroads.
prints all  tbo   news of Southeast
Kootenay, and costs $2 a year.
It is one of the largest
papers in Canada.
..I .ni i I
11 tii
Joy5 of Wedded Life
C B. Wolf in Coiling Cun.
My overcoat hangs in the woodshed now and the peg it occupies
holds things of weird design and
unknown name, I am married.
I have been tbat way about a
month. I can't tell you much
about it as it struck me suddenly
like falling out of bed. I am
thirty years old and bave bad
twenty-nine love affairs. I was
too young to have one the tirst
year. Having been exposed so
often I supposed myself i in in une
from matrimonial fever. One night
I went to bed apparently in the
best of health. The next morning
I had a mania for renting houses
and buying clock shelves. I
thought for a while it was indigestion or liver complaint. Its an
awful ma lad v.    Tears a fellow all
np. Makes him want to go and
die on somebody's grave or fight
Indians or write poetry. .Sometimes be wants to do all three at
once. Eatitig and sleeping and
working seem like a sinful waste
of time. All he wants to do is to
pick flowers and chase butterflies
and sing love ditties. Gives hirn a
sort of itchiness in his bosom that
nothing will scratch���like be had
swallowed a sofa pillow full of
feathers. When he sets his feet
down he never expects them to hit
the ground and sometimes he feels
like he wanted to go away out to the
edge and jump off or run nine
hundred miles and leap into the
Pacific Ocean. He dreams of
heaven and bean) harps and brass
bands and thing* playing all around
bim and sees whole flocks of little
angels roosting on the footboard of
his bed with heads tucked under
their wings and he has to pinch
himself to see if he is real flesh and
blood or only a summer cloud or a
hunk of seafoam.
I had a touch of the malady once
before, but I was younger then and
rallied. As usual there was a woman in it. There generally is in
such affairs. One man seldom loves
another���except when he wants
the other fellow to vote for him
and then it doesn't last long���the
courtship ends when the election is
over. And the woman is generally
single.    Few men love a married
^9    ^.s    ^3
4-9      4-*
woman. For the husbands its not
necessary and for the other fellow
its uo use. So most men lavish
their affections on single women.
That*s the kind my earlier affections were lavished ou. She was a
nice little arrangement���a petite
blonde of twenty summers and
heaven only knows how many
springs and falls. She had big innocent blue eyes that fairly made
you gasp for breath, and hair that
looked like tho frazzled out end of
an August sunbeam. Her complexion was such a beautiful pink
and white tbat I always looked at
my mouth when I got home to see
if it had rubbed off. And her
father bad two lovely farms. It is
needless to say I loved the very
ground she walked on. One time
she came trip; ing down the stairs
in a pink silk covered with white
chiffon and I was stricken with
flirtation of the heart and began to
look for a spot where I couhl kneel
without spoiling my dnck trousers.
I forget now just what was said,
but I never went back and for six
months the atmosphere reeked with
visions of pink silk and blue ��*yes
and chiffon ancl golden hair and
s s s
Reminiscent moods bring memories of several other mild attacks
in recent years, but none like* that
which nabbed my vitals when our
special stopped to pick us up and a
little symphony iu brown came
flc ating down ihe steps. She sits
across the table from me now writing letters to my new relations
with hcr little musical fists all
burned and cut and battered np
from wrestling with the kitchen*
range and culinary tools She waa
a music teacher and had never
played the cakewalk or the soup-
bone symphony on the hsrdcoal
range. She is undoubtedly the
most adorable little animal that
ever happened. Excuse me a
moment while I bite her ear. Of
course, we may get a divorce next
week, but just now we love
e*ach other harder than thunder
can bump a stump. I'm sorry I
didn't marry before. But somehow or other it always rained or
Homebody else in thc family had to
get married and so I kept putting
it off from day to day, Sometimes
it all seems like a dream that I'm
married now. I don't remember a
thing of the wedding day except
announcing���after the preacher had
conducted ten dollars' worth of
service over my remains- that five
minutes would be devoted to kissing the groom.
* *   *
After reading that the Shah of
Persia had six hundred wives it
used to puzzle me how the average
man could be happy with only one.
Somehow it seemed pitiful to start
out on the great seetbtrig, bubbling
sea of matrimony with only one
rneasley little scrawny two-legged
wife to your name. The monotony
of coming home to dinner day after
day only to find the same old ugly
wife dressed in the same old mother
hubbard with the same old frowsy
hair and the same old dirt under
her finger nails frying the some old
face over the cook stove frighteneel
uie. It seemed to me that a man
with any ambition would yearn for
a new wife and new frizzes and
new mother hubbanl and new dirt.
Hut somehow I feel myself strangely contented anel actually l*e!ie*ve*
that but feir the weight of duties
Incident to home making I should
have floated away Kike a thistle*
scmmI on thc wings of morning.
Fitting up a home in a country
village where you can't buy or
build is no snap. The home we
are living in is one that was built
in the early days before squares
and levels were invented. The
floors were so crooked that water
wouldn't eve*n seek its level on
them but simply stood in dejected
puddles not knowing whicli way to
move The man who built it found
the stove pipe hole��? on the prairie
and built the house around them
to save Inning new ones. He
measured the lumber with the hind
leg of his dog. Some of the hair is
sticking to the boards yet.
��� *   *
The last family that lived lo the
house had a mania for red paint
and eighteen inch bordei* on seven
foot walls and it looked inside like
a bunch of abandoned potato bins
in the culinary department of the
infernal regions. But today it ia
one of the ecru tinniest wolf dens in
the west. It haa rugs and curtains
and pianos and book cases and
folding beds and kitchen cabinets
and coaches and buffets and round LOWERY'S CLAIM
tables and china closets and chiffoniers and dressers and ranges and
things   iu   it till  you can't walk
around   nights   without   cracking
your shins or.i  them.    We have a
hard coal heater that makes things
so cosy you have to stand out doors
and fan yourself with your apron.
We also have a soft pine rolling
pin  that doesn't leave hardly any
dent in your head at all.    And we
have  things to eat,  too.      After
twenty   years of   boarding tbis is
quite a novelty   to me.    I  must
close now.    I had resolved to write
a funny article when I got married,
but somehow  matrimony   doesn't
seem so much like a joke as it did.
To   see   ine   prowling about   the
kitchen in the early dawn a eipink
pajamas you would never take me
for a humorist at all.   If you never
hear from me again you will know
the lady didn't like this article.
Natural  Question.
A lady while visiting a convict prison
to  one of  the   prisoners,  a  fat, good
looking person:
"My good man, what are you in here
"For robbery, at a seaside hotel."
"Were you the proprietor or the hend
waiter?" asked the lady.
"Do you believe in reincarnation?"
"I do."
"What are your grounds for thinking
that way?"
"Well, I know of a man who used lo
he called a bird. He now appears In
the form of a lobster.���Milwaukee Sen
"Mr. Buggins," said the attending
physician gravely, "I am a.:aid your
wife's mind ls gone."
"Well, I'm not surprised," replied Mr.
B. "She's heen giving me a piece of it
every day for twenty-three years, and
she didn't have a whole lot to start
on!"���Washington Life.
Polygamy Defined.
Rebecca was a junor at Normal Col
ledge, New York. Her book learing so
far exceeded her worldly knowledge
that she made many laughable mistakes. Upon being required to define
polygamy, she wrote: "Polygamy Vs
keeping saloons open on Sunday.���Ex.
"Till Death Us Do Part."
Oft in the lapses of the night,
When dead things live and live things
I touch you with a wild affright
Least you have ceased in sleep to sigh
An Alternative.
"Poor fellow!    His doctor tells him
the only thing that will cure him is a
course of mud baths, and he can! afford' streets  ln pairs looking   for   drunken
to go to the mud springs."
"Hut  surely he can go  into politics
and let the mud come to him."���Phlla
delphia Ledger.
Brave Man.
"Come," said the strong-minded woman. "I'm sure there's burglars downstairs. We will go down and scare
them away."
"Well, Maria," stammered her husband, "you gg-go first. They wouldn't
dare hit a woman."���Philadelphia Press
Need 'Em Now.
"Pa, what were these suits of armor
used for?"
"People wore 'em in olden times, my
"What sort of people, pa?"
"Oh, life insurance agents, I s'pose.'
���Louisville Courier-Journal.
Looking for Trouble.
"What are you taking that gallon jug
along for?"
"Snake bite remedy, old fellow!"
"And where are you going?"
"To find  the  snakes!"���Atlana  Con
Not   Embezzlement.
"I hear your cashier is in trouble/
said the first bank president.
"Yes," said the second bank presi
dent, "he's charged with stealing."
"Oh, then he didn't get much, eh?"
Little man at the theatre, vainly trying to catch a glimpse over the shoulders of a big man in front of him, at
length touches him on the shoulder.
Big man (turning round)���"Can't you
see anything?" Little man (pathetically)���"Can't see a streak of the stage."
Big man���"Why, then, I'll tell you what
to do. You keep your eye on me, and
laugh when I (Jo."���Ex.
When a man loves books he has in
him that which will console him under
many sorrows; and strengthen him in
various trials. Such a love will keep
him at home, and make his time pass
pleasantly And when a man
is at home and happy with a book, sitting by his fireside, he must be a churl
if he does not communicate that happiness.���J. H. Friswell.
A revival is in progress In Topeka
and a "yell" has been adopted. Here it
is: "Say, my chum, have you seen Second Timothy two fifteen? First Thes-
salonians five twenty-two, will tell you
exactly what to do."���Atcheson Globe
It is only when digested in a clear
and natural order that truths make
their proper Impression on the mind,
and that erroneous opinions can be combated with success.���Dugald Stewart.
In Berlin, Germany, women, dressed
in  a  semi-military uniform, walk the
men. When they find one he is taken
home or to some place of shelter'by
these good Samaritans. Out west we
know some camps where the boys would
get drunk every day for the pleasure of
being lugged home by nice women ln
Before the phantom of that hour,
Time's Officer to you and me,
A miserable wretch I cower
And plead for pity, hopelessly.
"May we not tread the path," I cry,
Together? None the way can miss;
It ends against the sunset sky���
A turning or a precipice.
���Francis Coutts.
Hully gee! They'll be employing football tactics, such as the flying wedge
and centre rushes to drive the poor, unprotected sinners to the mourners'
bench next.���Dallas Record.
"When it Was Dark" is the title of a
new religious novel. The author must
have attended an allnight meeting of
the Salvation Army with the lights out.
If we did indeed love our enemies, tf
even now we began to love our enemies,
* * * we would have no enemies.���
Leo  Tolstoy, in "Bethink Yourselves."
Brotherly love and charity do not
consist so much in what you give as
how little you take from your fellow
man.���Medico-Pharmaceutical Journal.
Tendency to disease and tendency to
vice are of similar origin, and neither
can be cured by punishment, vengeance
or imprisonment.���Medical Brief.
Religion is like a palm tree��� it grows
at the top. The dead leaves are all orthodox, while the new ones and the buds
are all heretics.���Ingersoll.
Love is like Scotch whiskey. Sip it
lightly and you will ascend into heaven.
Take a bath iu it and the snakes will
dance before your eyes.
When Life is woe,
And Hope is dumb.
The World says, "Go!"
The Grave says, "Come."
Mainland Cigar
 ilimi i�����
���..WBBtli 14
Spiel on Tenderfeel
Bv Wheelhouse Clcinrij.  ^
Philip J. Newman, in his story
about Jerry Murphy in Out West,
draws a picture of Wheelbouse
Clancy that is interesting to those
familiar with the hot waves of mining camp life. Clancy was a
gambler and here is tbe spiel he
makes to Jerry one morniug.
"You missed a mighty pretty
play last night, Jerry," he says.
*'There was a little touch of old-
time gambling. It waa suckers win
and gamblers lose, too���I lost my
"Wbo win?" I says.
"A couple of strangers���miners,
in from somewhere with a few
months' pay. They were dressed
up to kill, with silk shirts and nugget scarf-pins, skin-tight kid shoes,
twelve-dollar pants, aud Steteon
hats. I was out sporting my diamonds, myself"���old John's fat
sides shook���"and wherever I went
I noticed them���always together���
mixing in the crowd, watching the
games, taking a drink, now ancl
then, but banking tlieir money safe
in their pockets. But when the
Chink, Skinny Johnson, got busy
fixing the lottery tickets in the
back of the room there, the lads
couldn't stand the pressure. One
of them fished up a quarter, and
marked a ticket. After the draw
every Chink in the room crowded
around the stranger for a 'look see'
���bc had made an eight spot, and
drew down a couple of hundred
bucks.    The bovs bad a few drinks
to celebrate, and then I sees thero
off in a corner, talking it over.
You know how it was- that two
hundred wa�� velvet���they coulel
afford to risk that. Oiieof them���
the big black fellow���takes fifty
and sits in the faro game. In half
a deal he runs it up to three hundred, cashes in, and they left. I
went over and cashed in; and about
1 o'clock Skinny Johnstm came
after me. A run was lieing made
on the wheel and maybe I could
change the luck.
The same two laels, with all the
town at their heels, were bucking
the wheel. Tbey were out with
the luck of a life-time, taking a
piece of hide off every eame in
town. I took tbe deal, but the
machine was wrong.   I eouldu't
^3     *^$     ��*.$
spin the ball but it came on the
red, aud the players were betting
the limit on the color. Kvery thing
was lovely. The big fellow was
making the beta, and the little one
stood at the end of the table, taking
down the pay, milking the game to
a fare-ye-well. The little fellow
was sure travelling on his nerve.
Ile was a mid lling tall, slim fellow,
built like a whip, without a bone
in him. His curly red hair was
combed nice and purty, and his
rot ton mustache was twisted tight
to his square-cut reel face. Some
girl had pinned a bunch of pinks
to his shirt, and be sang a little
good-luck song as he took in the
'Every time he spins the hall
She hops out on the rosy,
And every time I cops the dough
I smells my true love's posy.'
"The big fellow was sulky with
drink, and I saw if I could turn
tbe play, and stick him for a few
bets, the money would bc coming
back. I offered Re*d ten dollars for
his bunch of pinks, but he said h*
wouldn't take a thousand���they
belonged to his true-love. The
little fellow ke*pt his posy"'- John
laughed his slow, wheezing, whiskey laugh���"she kept 'hopping on
the rosy,' four times out of live,
and tbe best 1 coulel get was a big
crimp in the bank-roll. As soon
as they lost three lictsin succession
the little fellow broke the play off
short. The big one hulled around
for more play, but reel made it up
to l.im, saying tbey would godowil
to Johnny Duncan's and get bank.
1 laid for them but tbey didn't
come in again. Perhaps you know
them, Jerry; they called each other
Jack ancl Scotty."
"Oh, yes," I says, "Scotty Oan-
non; Scott Gannon ancl Jack Truly,
they always travel together; you hit
one, you bit the other. 1 know
them well."
John tossed his rag aud brush
into a drawer, and lit a cigar.
"Play like this, Jerry," he says,
blowing up the smoke, "is good for
a community. These hoys won't
go out of town with a dollar; they'll
scatter the money all over town.
Iu our early mining camps, every
body bad money because nobody
kept it: a man got quick action on
what he bad and everybody got a
chance at it. And no man could
pretend anything he couldn't establish with his hands. But with
this tenderfoot gang���the "moral
element"���everything is bluff, mystery, superstition���and Squeezing
tbe almighty dollars. Suck around
the fellow that's got plenty- he's a
big chief���spend all your money on
him and maybe he'll associate with
you. But if a poor widow woman
is trying to support her children-
she's nobody. She isn't Mrs. So-
an'-so���Jew   hcr down  to the last
cent because she needs the money.
That's the tcnelerfoot way of whip-
sawing the turn. Iu our day and
place, Jerry, how did we treat the
widow ami the orphan? She would
take- in washing, and hire an Indian
to do i', and make more than a
mine stipe i mtendent. And if any
fellow went after his washing anel
didn't propose to her he was no
"I elon't like the tenderfoot,"
says John, "and I elon't like his
country, but I suppose we'll have
to come to it: things are changing
fast Only yesterday a tambourine
was shoved under my nose*, and
there Stood an Indian girl in a Salvation Army uniform. 'Are you
saved, my brother?' she says. Asking me if I was saved! Me that
SSW her mother and her grandmother in a (i-string! She rattled
me so. I OOOghed up a couple of
bucks into her jingle-pan before I
knew it."
What will it profit a man if he
gain the world, antl die without
having read  Lowkky's Claim.
r. gmott
Sells   Furniture,   Coffins,   Billiard
and Pool Tables, Wall Paper,
Mirrors and Bar Fixtures.
Write for Anything You Want.
Pr-Urt-i SHjadg and
Or-i-jarpentaf T^2S
Garden, ttledd in-t flower nen-d*, out flower*
uml  tfr* i*ii!i'*u*.�� plant*.
Henry'* OrcMnhOBMi and Niir*����*rlen
Vancouver, B  0.
TtinWtfr *
Halting Monev^Past.
The following]]* extracts from
Okanagan papers show how fast
mouey is made in ^British Columbia:
T. W.   Stirling,   of    Kelowna,
vicarious atonement, a supernatural savior, a miraculous salvation,
a cramped heaven, an ample hell,
belongs to the credulity of ignorance; it is of itself a mark of the
unsaved, the evidence of damnation that obtains now, the  dam-
IN  io AND 20 ACRE
For sale on easy terms.
uetted $5,000 at the packing house; nation of one who sets convention |^ ����� ANNABLE, NelSOn, B. C.
off of 16 acres of apples,Jpears and and tradition agaiust science and
plums. j history and   the    ever-expanding
Lord Aberdeen's ranch near Ver j vision of the wise.���Jenkin   Lloyd
non yieldedJa crop from its 20-acre Jones.
orchard of 12 year old : Northern <��>
A Chinaman clad in the typical
laundrvman's costume,  entered a
9* 7
street-car one day aud took a seat
Soy apple trees that sofd for $15,
The statement recently published
that Gellatley and Sons badj made j next to au Irishwoman of generous
a portion of tlieir land yield an in-1 proportions. He shivered, shook
come of $5,000 an acrejias cause himself and then with that yearn-
soine' doubting'    comments.     Mr. | iug for human sympathy which ex-
of 50,000 pounds to the acre.     At j turned on him scornfully aud snap
ten cents a pound fyou can easily peel out: " Well, if ye'd tuck yei
shirt inside yer pants ye hathen,
yer belly wouldn't be eolel."���Ex.
The Centralia Courier says that
every dog has its tlay, and most of
'em have it when they arc pups.
There are young bloods swelling
around like millionaires in this
town, this year of our Lord, 1905,
who will be sawing wood at six bits
a cord in 1925.
The first verse of the Fifty-first
Psalm is called the "neck verse."
for the reason that in former times
figure out the result.
Pickings Ftom nction.
Ambitious people must always
he disappointed people.���"Fame
For a Woman."
The best kind of courage often
comes from a full stomack.���Captain Macklin.
Love is like honey���it must be
taken by sips. One must not swim
in it.���"The Pharaoh and the
The man who is weakened Iu I a nian condemned to death some-
well doing by the ingrati tilde of j times had a chance to save his life
others is serving God ou 11 salary ; by proving that he could read, and
basis.���"The Power of Truth."       this verse was used as a test.
You will live twenty years longer
if you will brush your skin twice a
day, and read Lowery's Claim.
Mark Twain  was  70 years old
the other day  but did not take it
Mills   are sometimes    built to
grind suckers instead of  ore.
Kissing a fashionable lady is one
way to remove paint.
Send your cent belt friends a
copy of this journal.
Nine times out often a woman
falls through love, and she must be
reached by love if sh.i is to bo restored.���"Down In Water Street."
Knew A Da^s Work
"What happened to Smith?"
" Au' couldn't be swim?"
"He did, for eight hours, but be
was a union mau."
There is no damnation more deplorable than the imbecility of the
parasites who are willing to eat unearned bread, to shelter themselves
in another's strength, to clothe
themselves with the purity of
another's soul, either in time or
eternity.   The   whole   scheme of
of   1-JrU ish    Colombia
KCKNKltY 8��e
for Uiews
Wadds Bros, Nelson, B. C
15 year's experience in  coal mines of
B. C.   Reports furnished on coal
prupci tics.
Sharp 3c  Irvine
Real Estate and Insurance Agents
John Hutchison & Co.
East  Kootenay  Timber, Farming
and Coal Lands.
Is the best newspaper in the Crow's
Nest Pass coal region.    Two
dollars per annum.
D. V. M0TT, Editor.
��M*ftl t
A friend's Advice.
A friend in East Kootenay writes
us to switch our bill-of-fare, and
give our readers something else in
lieu of the kind of religion we
printed last month. He says that
no mau with a sound brain cares
to read much of the religion we had
in our last issue. From his letter
we would infer that our friend has
some moss in bis upper stope which
prevents him from seeing as we do,
or else we have the moss. However, in expressing our opinion and
publishing the facts gleaned from
history an ent church and creed we
do not set ourselves up as a dictator.
We like everyone to have his own
think tank in operation. We do
not believe in monopoly of thought,
and that is probably why we express ourselves so freely upon matters of human interest. The majority of people who blindly follow
creed and church do not think for
themselves, and become like wax
in the hands of those trained to
mould aud hold the people for
their own aggrandizement. Wc
have never warred nor never will
against any man for believing any
creed, but every now and again we
may blaze forth against those people
who promote theologic fog in order
that tbey may loll upou cushions
while their hypnotized adherents
are out in tbe boiling sun sweating
and rustling for pennies with which
to feed tbe non-dyspeptic denominational slot machine.
Tor Brlciht Eyes.
Don't use the eyes before breakfast.
Don't face the light when reading or sewing.
Don't allow a cold raw wind to
strike the eyes.
Don't use the eyes when they are
tired or weak from illness.
Don't try to get a cinder out of
tbe eye by rubbing tbe injured orb;
rub the other eye.
Don't sleep too much or too little.
Too much sleep weakens tbe eyes;
too little fatigues them.
Don't work longer tbrn two
hours without closing tbe eyes and
resting them for five minutes.
Dou't neglect to bathe the eyes
before retiring, so as to remove any
dust that may have gathered on
the lids during the day.
Lowery's Claim is one of the
best advertising   mediums in the
west. Show your appreciation of
an honest journal by sending in
your ads.
The C. P. R. created Vancouver
and the child now thinks it is big
enough to knife its parent.
The nimble ad catches the slow
Kootenay Railway & Navigation Company, Ltd.
Kuslo A Sleie-itii Railway Co.
International Nav.  a Trailing  Co., Met.
Int. N?vijration & Trad. Co.
&00 a. m. hare  Kaslo..   . Mrif-sfctS p. m
7:e*l  Ainsworth     . MA
-.��� l�� a. ni. arrive*    . Nulaon.  . ..leave !>M> p. tr*
Calling regularly at Ainsworth and Pilot Hay
and all wny I Hiding* on signal.
Kaslo & Slocan Railway.
*:ejo a. m. leave ��� Ka*h> arrive 3:C> p, m.
l<>:/;. a in. arrive.. Sandon leav*l:.mp. nt.
Ocean fft<>am��hip tieket-M anel   rate* via all
line* will 1-e funmhe* J on appllca ion.
��� Kor further j>.��rt nuhir-e call ou or add re m
Kupt. Kaalo, B. C Ag��nt. K����l-> 11. 0.
(Late a*��ayer Nelson smelter)
(lold. Silver or Lead, each >i em
Cornier ti 5(1 O old-Si I ver eji JO
Charge* for other metals on application.
i\ O. Drawer litis Teh phone Aei7
The Kaslo Hotel j," -fctitU.i
in the eity.        COCKLE a PAPWORTH.
���PVi/v VilhAT-t* bi Sandon, 11. C , ia a ple-n*
1 HO X liUUi W aut h�� me for all travel', rs.
McLeod Hotel, 3ftfi&**!Ua
in theeity.   Sample room*.
rot tar rclkod.
The Bartlett* ���*�� h*pt #l *lUy hoM
help tniph>y��*d.
in   Nehuin    Only  wlut-u
Tremont House, S^'Si:
and Ku'opean plan.    Nothing yellow about
h�� line ese-fiit the gold in thoi-afe.
Sewmarket Hotel &"�������&
millionaire*!, vi-.itlug New Deliver, II C.
CeV    ri-mA is th-f hading hotel in THAU.,
OL. JbimQ B.C.      Ja*. Da won, frrap.
Is situated on a slight eminence,  just a block from the busy
scenes on Baker street, and is within easy touch of everything in the city.   From its Uilconiescan bc pecn nearly
aU the grand scenery that surrounds the beautiful
city of Nelson.     Few hotels in the great west
equal  the Stratbcona, and tourists from
every land will find within its portals
all tbe essentials that create pleas-
aut memories within the
mind of those who
B. TOflKIINS, flamiager
���vviif���w   -���������
...    -r      II     I-  -v


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