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The Standard Oct 7, 1916

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Vol. V, No. 23���Established 1911
VANCOUVER, B. C, SATURDAY, OCTOBER 7, 1916
Price Five Cents
CANADA'S GREATEST ATTRACTION:
HON. SIR SAM HUGHES
An Appreciation of the Great Minister of
Militia whom Opportunity found at the
Helm of State.
Who would like to lead His Gallant Men
at the Front, but Whose Country Insists
He Remain at Ottawa.
son, the first sea lord, was frequently called in. In consequence of thc instructions believed to have been given
directly by Sir Sam, the Bremen never arrived in American
waters. A grcat deal of mystery surrounds this vessel,
but if a Bremen does arrive it will not be thc original vessel, which was captured. Sir Sam did, however, order
that the latest British submarines should be exhibited
for public inspection so that the world might know how
The Heroic Paladin of a Hundred Debates "uuh '" advance of ail others British construction of these
under-sea boats was. If the British Admiralty can only
>e persuaded to hurry up for once, it is possible that the
inlcr will be carried out by the end of the war. It is this
leadly slowness which irritates Sir Sam and causes his
gorge to rise. If only the British people would recognise
his genius for saying the wrong thing they would have
won the war long ago owing to thc manner in which Germany would have been misled.
CANADA'S GREATEST ATTRACTION
Tilly Savoy Hotel in London, England, has for many
years been thc resort of millionaires, princes and
others, but in the last few weeks its fame has soared
skyward as the temporary residence of Major-General
the Hon. Sir Sam Hughes, Minister of Militia for the
Dominion of Canada. The advertisement thc hotel has
obtained through the presence of this most illustrious
of Dominion soldiers and statesmen should be worth at
least a large discount off his bill. Day and night its portals have swung wide to admit generals, colonels, secretaries, royalty and contractors who have crowded the
ante-room of Sir Sam. A special room has been set aside
for telegraph clerks, stenographers and publicity agents.
All day long they slave at their congenial task in order
to supply the world with the minutest details of the minister's movements, The public avariciously devour the
official and strictly censored bulletins which are posted
hourly outside thc hotel. Crowds throng the corridors,
all intent on seeing or saluting Sir Sam. More crowds
throng the dining-room, hoping to have the honor of eating in his presence. Thc head waiter is said to have
reaped a huge fortune merely by reserving seats at so
much per seat, according to the distance from the famous
military expert. Journalists have camped outside his door
for days in the hope of being allowed to catch a glimpse
of him. But Sir Sam shuns unofficial interviews. He prefers to have his doings recorded without any frills. He
modestly assumes that the public desires to know of his
magnetic personality at first hand and not through the
exaggerated and fanciful descriptions often circulated in
the press. He would prefer to be beading his gallant
troops in the field, were it not for the everlasting demands
made on him for advice and instructions in Ottawa and
London. He feels that if he'were in the field the interest
of tlie public in thc war would become a secondary matter. He dislikes to think that he might arouse jealousy in
the breasts of Generals Joffre or Haig, the Grand Duke
Nicholas or Brussiloff, and so represses his ardor for the
sake of continued amity in the Grand Alliance.
WHY THE OFFENSIVE STARTED
But none the less he believes in complete frankness.
He recognises that most men have their limitations and
that at times it is necessary to assert himself. He thoroughly believes in complete confidence between the higher commands, and it is rumored about the corridors of
the hotel that more than once he has intervened between
the civilian Mr. Lloyd George and General Sir Douglas
Haig. He, of course, would tactfully deny that there was
ever cause for his intervention, but it is known that since
Mr. Lloyd George became Minister of War, General Haig
has started the offensive and it is a curious coincidence
that only about a month before that Sir Sam was in London. At that time, it is said, he was determined lo resign
unless something was done by the British to show that
the Imperial government realised there was a war going
on. Nothing has been made public, but it is reported on
the authority of thc night porter at the hotel that if it
had not been for the necessity of Sir Sam's presence iu
Canada to put the Shell Committee straight, Germany
would have made peace last July. Unfortunately domestic
politics in Canada intervened and Sir Sam was obliged to
return. The Kaiser hearing of tliis, despite the secrecy
which attended it, at once countermanded his orders to
von Bcthmann Hollweg and dismissed von Falkeuhayn.
The whole German nation was enthused and believed once
more that victory was in sight. Sir Sam had returned
to Ottawa and abandoned Britain to her fate. It is reported in political circles in Ottawa that a large secret
fund was sent from the German embassy in Washington
for thc purpose of bribing the Duff-Meredith commission
to censure Sir Sam. What became of the money is not
known, but immediately his evidence was given, Sir Sam
rushed back to London, only to find, alas, that his ab
sence had been known in Berlin, with the natural consequences that the war was prolonged indefinitely. It is
said that the honorary Colonel Wesley Allison bought a
new motor-car in New York, but being, according to Sir
Sam, a man of the greatest integrity and the soul of honor, it is absurd to link his name with the alleged secret
fund.
WHISPERINGS AT THE ADMIRALTY
There is nothing Sir Sam dislikes so much as unauthorised publicity. He prefers to retire modestly behind his
press agent. He regrets that the public insists on knowing' what he is doing and how he does it. For instance,
it is known that the Savoy Hotel looks over the embankment on to the Thames and at Temple Pier, almost directly opposite, is moored the German submarine mine
layer, which was recently captured. Recently Sir Sam
desired to inspect this submarine, so, according to his
publicity agent, he motored from the hotel across the
embankment, a distance of some 200 yards, and was received by a large crowd, spontaneously gathered and all
agog to see Sir Sam. He was shown over thc submarine
and expressed his approval of the steps which led to its
capture. Naturally he could not make any statement on
the subject, but on re-entering the motor with his aide,
he whispered to the latter to tell the orderly chauffeur
to drive at once to the Admiralty. Here he was closeted
vvith Mr. Balfour for at least an hour and Sir Henry Jack-
German guns and retired behind the natural defences of
Great Britain���the sea coasts. Sir Sam from the Savoy
Hotel would then have taken complete charge of the operations and accompanied by a large suite of honorary
colonels, might have been able to inspect the defences
anc) seen they were in proper condition to receive the
impetuous onslaught of the foe. The latter, embarking
on an element foreign to his experience, would have had
his morale shaken by the sea, and reaching the famous
cliffs of Dover, would have been greeted with a perfect
storm of shot and shell. His losses would have been incalculable, and the navy would have had an easy task to
finish the task begun by Sir Sam. In this way thc Germans
would have been lured to their destruction. Salients are
naturally exposed positions and though they may com-
mand certain lines of communications and force the enemy
lo keep a very large number of men concentrated round
them, they arc- a source of heavy loss. To hold a salient
like Ypres after Sir Sam had pointed out that it was a
dangerously exposed position, is little short of criminal,
and thc British authorities will no doubt receive due condemnation for their obstinacy when Sir Sam finds leisure
to publish his views on the subject.
NO PLACE FOR POLITICIANS
All Canada will be intensely relieved to hear that Sir
Sam appreciates the fact that the front is no place for
politicians, however eloquent, active or astute. Knowing
how eloquent, active and astute Sir Sam is, Canada was
truly a little nervous lest he recklessly ride through the
breach in the German lines and reach Berlin a few months
ahead of scheduled time. Thc magic of his name would
have been sufficient to clear a path for the oncoming
infantry, and his eloquence would have forced the way
through all the German defences. In fact it is rumored
around thc war office in London that one of the real reasons for Sir Sam's attack on the late Lord Kitchener,
just after the tragedy which deprived Great Britain of thc
services of that silent leader, was that Lord Kitchener refused to allow Sir Sam to go to the front and talk to the
Germans. Nevertheless, stories from the front do relate
how a certain masterful man, carefully disguised in the full
toggery of a staff officer, so as not to attract too much
observation, managed to make his way into the front line
trenches one night and insisted on turning the occupants
out for inspection. After several excellent criticisms of
the.- trenches and their occupants had soared to high heaven
BOUND FOR THE JUNK HEAP
Nothing But Bumps and Blow-outs for the Bob Rogers Jitney
ACTION IS EVERYTHING
Thc foregoing is merely an illustration of the energy
of Sir Sam. Anyone but Sir Sam would have walked across
the embankment to Temple Pier. But the new world
does not produce men who walk even twenty yards when
they can use a motor car. "Save time" is the motto of
Sir Sam. "Time is money" and other brilliant epigrams
of that kind come easily to him. Action is everything.
While others think he acts, and that is why he totally disagrees with General Sir William Robertson, Mr. Asquith
and others who say little, but think a lot. The newspapers in Great Britain realise the worth of Sir Sam. and
despite his loquacity, they succeed in keeping him down
to not more than a column a day. Sir Sam deprecates this
attitude on Uieir part and insists that they are behind the
times. When he arrives or departs from New York he is
better satisfied, lie asserts that when a man lias something to say it is better to say it. even if it is unpleasant.
He sees no reason at all why he should not give Americans thc benefit of his experiences. Preparedness is the
national topic just now. and who should bc better posted
on preparedness than Sir Sam? If it had not been for him
where would Grcat Britain have been today? Every British statesman admits now that Great Britain was unprepared for war with Germany. But Sir Sam had seen it
coming and in consequence had become Minister of Militia purposely so that Canada might have thc benefit of
his services. If he had not stuck to his office in Canada
and refused to budge under any circumstances, it is said,
on excellent authority, that he might have had any command he chose in the field on the lines oi communication.
But he felt that he could not honestly command in the
field with Lord Kitchener at the War Office, and so refused all temptations.
��
HISTORY A LA SIR SAM
When the history of the war is written by Sir Sam���if
he can be persuaded to give the world the benefit of his
knowledge on the subject���the late Lord Kitchener will
doubtless be mentioned. But his war work compared
with that of Sir Sam is so small and so commonplace tliat
doubtless it will sink into insignificance compared with
the task accomplished by the redoubtable Sir Sam himself.
It must bc remembered that Sir Sam is not responsible
for the mistakes made by the British. If they had only
listened to his advice they would have abandoned the
Ypres   salient  and  any  other  positions  in  range  of  the
A BACKDOOR APPRECIATION
The London DAILY .MAIL in an editorial on October
2, stated:
"The Canadian press, reflecting the views uf Canadian soldiers who have endured actual warfare in
France, is anxious lest, in gratitude for liis zeal in raising men, Sir Sam shall be given a command at the
front. F.arly iu the war certain political soldiers received unwise commands, but as thc sanguinary nature
of the struggle developed, it became obvious that tin-
front is no place for politicians, however eloquent,
active or astute. Tin- Canadian press and thc Canadian
soldiers need, therefore, have no anxiety. It is understood Sir Sam appreciates ihc changed situation, and i^
not seeking active service. We arc glad t" record the
fact, for we agree with our Canadian contemporaries
that political appointments might bring about disaster
of the first magnitude to the Canadian arm] Sir Sam
is doing good work here in keeping the Dominion in
the limelight and we arc glad to have him among us."
Is that criticism, praise or blame? It is worth while
analysing such a masterly summary of Sir Sam's position
and endeavoring to extract from it the really comforting
conclusion that Sir Sam is an excellent publicity agent for
the Dominion of Canada. Of course the DAILY MAIL,
being published in London, knows nothing of Canada. In
its ignorance it evidently believes that Sir Sam is an advertising agent, not the Minister of Militia under whose
aegis Canada has sent to the battlefields of Europe over
360,000 men. It seems to recognise, however, that Sir
Sam, even as a publicity agent, has been a most successful
recruiting officer. It throws on the Canadian press the
real responsibility for keeping Sir Sam out of the field.
If this is so, the Canadian press realises the value of Sir
Sam and refuses to allow him to risk his political life at
the front. His energy, his insistence, and persistence in
accomplishing his objectives are so well known that theie
is no need to dwell upon them. But as an illustration, the
Ross rifle is excellent. Sir Sam believed in it and ordered
it. It was thrown away by the soldiers whenever possible,
but Sir Sam stuck to it. Through good report and ill. he
insisted that it -was the best rifle and eventually, by making many alterations until it is practically the same as
the Lee-Metford. it is believed his persistence has been
rewarded. Sir Sam may change his friends, but he invariably sticks to them.
between the booming of the guns, his commands woke
the Germans in the opposing trenches, and a loud, stentorian voice shouted in excellent English, "For God's
sake keep that schoolmaster of yours quiet, we can't get
any sleep." Stories like this must be accepted with a
great deal of suspicion as they are not officially verified
! by Sir Sam's publicity agent.
NO TIME FOR APPRECIATION
i vever, thanks to the DAM.*, M ML. the anxiety of
the Canadian press lest Canada be relieved of thi p sei ce
ol its own inimitable minister of militia is unfounded. He
will retu i. ii fact i-, returning, and ii due course the
American press will no doubt record mere of hi.s saying*
iik-isms of Mr. Asquith and othen phi
arc con icting I ie war. It is well known that everything
possible was don< to keep him in London, According t>
the latest suggestions emanating fn m certain basements
in ' 'ttawa, -,t was proposed that each member of the lc'-
eral parliament subscribe a certain sun-, for the purpose
of keeping Sir San*, in London, or Saloniki, or Paris���
anywhere as long as he was not in Ottawa. Tliere may
be some truth in tins, as it is understood that Sir Sam is
determined to get rid of the scheming opposition politicians. Despite his well-known dislike for anything which
savors of favoritism, some people have been able through
various underlings, to have themselves gazetted honorary
colonels in the service of the Dominion of Canada. It is
to these colonels the DAILY MAIL seems to refer, and it
shows the inaccuracy of that paper when all over Canada
Sir Sam is famous for setting his face like a flint against
inefficiency of any kind. These same schemers evidently
desired Sir Sam to go to thc front and thus the DAILY
MAIL has fallen into the common error of attributing to
Sir Sam himself an idea which emanated among his political enemies. Everyone will wonder how the DAILY
MAIL can suggest that Sir Sam appreciates the changed
situation. Sir Sam appreciates nothing. He anticipates it,
provides for it, and allows others to do the appreciating.
He has no time for that sort of thing. He never makes
a mistake, and therefore there is no need to recognise a
changed situation. It is only changed in the minds of some
servile scribbler for the press.
A COLONELCY FOR VOTE COLLECTORS
"Political appointments to commands in the field might
bring about disaster of thc first magnitude," states the
DAILY MAIL. As if Sir Sam did not know that long
before the war. To insinuate that Sir Sam is guided by
his political associations in any degree whatsoever is ab- -.. ~
TWO
THE   STANDARD
SATURDAY,    OCTOBER    7,    1916
U% #iatiharii
Published every Saturday at 42�� Homer Street. Vancouver.
Telephone  Seymour 471
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nd Claaa Mall Mattor.
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Member ef the Canadian Preaa Association.
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Chinook, circulates In Vancouver and the cltlea, towns, villages and settlements throughout llritish Columbia. Id
politics the paper ta Independent Liberal.
Publishers The Standard Printers
surd. Sir Sam leads���he is never guided. He appoints
men because they are fitted to occupy positions they have
never had any experience of. He is a genius for picking
out the genius in others. He knows a soldier at a glance
and gives him a job raising men or driving motor cars or
something really active in Canada, where his services
can bc fully utilised. Canada could not spare such men
for the front. They draw their pay regularly at home or
in London, where they arc attached to various officers
with the rank, and pay of colonels. It is said that Mr. F.
Welsh, of the Vancouver School Board, grocer and caterer
in chief to the general public, will bc given a colonelcy
or a similar decoration by Sir Sam for his energy in collecting the British Columbia soldiers' votes, provided, of
course, that they have been collected the right side up.
It will doubtless be most disappointing to Mr. Welsh, if
after having such a delightful holiday at the expense of
the British Columbia taxpayer, he is not given something
by which to remember the elections of September 14, 1916.
The Canadian Press, with one accord, will welcome the
return of Sir Sam Hughes. It has been amazed, disquieted
and amused over the publicity he has achieved on his last
trip to Great Britain. It knows that statesmen and everyone else in Great Britain are only too anxious to show
courtesy and appreciation to any ministers from the Dominion. If Sir Sam represents Canada's military department, for the time being, he is made much of as that representative, and despite his own desire for as little publicity as possible under the circumstances. Poor Sir Sam,
he cannot hide his light ,under a bushel, and where it
strikes it blinds. It staggers those who are caught in
the circle of its brilliance.
THE HIGH COMMISSIONERSHIP
Sir Sam is dazzling. His pyrotechnic eloquence, his
superb nonchalance, his habit of receiving visitors with
all the aplomb and superb manner of royalty, is well
known. Stretched out on a magnificently upholstered
lounge in his private sitting room at the Savoy, uniformed,
booted, spurred and ready for action, he is a superb and
moving sight. His energy is at once apparent to the
most casual visitor. The aforesaid magnificent upholstery
is scored and scarred by his spurs. He wants to bc up and
doing. In fancy free he is ahead of his men on a glorious charger, and his horse is being spurred on to greater
exertions. In reality he has to face some dull drudgery,
to give some interview to some stupid press man who
docs not appreciate thc fact that he is talking to a Man
among Men, a heroic paladin of a hundred parliamentary
debates, a fiery crusader against all royal commissions,
and one who, having once given thc accolade of honor to
a business man, never withdraws it. "What I have said I
have said. Piffle," is thc motto inscribed on the shield
of Sir Sam. Certain of his more virulent political opponents have called upon him to resign. "Resign," cries
Sir Sam. "Not I. I have always been able to hold my end
up. I am not going to the front because my services are
absolutely necessary in Canada where my department has
been running along anyhow during my absence. But resign���why should I. Let mc see my foes face to face, let
me talk to them within their own gates and not slander
a man who has done more to serve his country than any
man living. If I had my way, if my advice had been
taken thc war would have been over long ago. But I am
J not thc man to tactlessly force my views on anyone. All
over Great Britain I have been hailed as a grcat hero
and the true type of new statesman. Probably I shall
take the High Commissioncrsbip if my friend, Sir Max
Aitken, will bc my chief secretary and publicity agent.
Otherwise I remain indefinitely Canada's Greatest Attraction."
���CRITICUS.
���EDITORIAL OPINIONS.
POTENTIAL INDUSTRIES OF B. C. ��� WOOD
MANUFACTURE
AN article in this issue of THE STANDARD contains
a brief summarization of the marvellous wealth and
wealth creating power of British Columbia timber.
With such an array of material, and with water-power in
abundance and facilities for shipment unsurpassed, is it
not astounding that nothing in the nature of an extensive
manufacture of wood exists in the Province? It is more
than astounding, it is culpable, if not criminal, on the part
of the people of British Columbia, who for the past thirteen years, when the Province was emerging from the
wildness of nature to a commercial and mercantile centre,
have failed to advance with the times, and instead of creating industries, have recklessly transferred thc materials of
manufacture to the clutch and grasp of relentless speculators.    There they remain  today unpaid for even to the
ORDER NOW Your
PRIVATE  GREETING CARDS
G. S. FORSYTH & CO.
Cor. Homer and Hastings Streets
government except in so far as was necessary to secure
the hold over them, and there they are expectantly awaiting the termination of the war when money will again
freely circulate, and big deals in timber limits will again
become a feature of the daily transactions of the real estate operators. How these timber limits were wrongfully
acquired, and how the title to tlft-m stands upon an illegal
basis today are subjects not pertinent to the present article
which concerns our potential industries. We have in spite
of the widespread alienations, still almost inexhaustible
material for manufacture; and we have the water-power
and the means of shipment. Why do we not establish
industries in wood?
The Germans ever since the confederation of their
Empire, less than fifty years ago, have been advancing
so as to make themselves the greatest commercial people
on the earth. Of recent years tlieir advance was phenomenally rapid; but it was not till they had plunged themselves headlong into the maelstrom of murderous war
that the world became aware of the immensity and variety
of their manufactures, or of the ponderousness of the
commerce which they had in the course of years adroitly
piled unto the back of every nation from the Ural mountains to the Rockies and Andes���through Europe, Asia,
Africa and America.
Among the items of tlieir manufacture and world-wide
commerce were wood commodities. These were of every
dimension and classification. Hugeness of size varied
with fantastic designs in the ornamental and diminutive
toy; and all were launched upon thc markets of the world
in an endless profusion. The remarkable thing about the
colossal achievement is that thc articles were largely
manufactured from imported raw material.
When war broke out it was thought by those who did
not expectantly wait each morning for a declaration of
peace that an opportunity was presented for Vancouver
and some of the other cities and centres to establish
wood industries such as those which had so signally contributed to Germany's commercial greatness. The Germans were for thc time at all events removed from the
arena of competition, and instead of importing, British
Columbia had the raw material in abundance and in great
variety. All auxiliaries in the way of bard woods
for blending and ornamental purposes were easily procurable from California and Southern America; and even
the procurement of these might be effected by way of an
exchange or barter for some of our softer woods. This
itself foreboded thc possibility of establishing a reciprocal
trade along the Pacific between our timber exporters and
the Southern Republics.
When the subject was suggested to the manufacturers'
association in the autumn of 1914, it was whimsically and
superciliously turned aside by the exclamation: "Oh industries in wood! We've more industries than we want or
can handle; and this war will be over before the new
year." The rejoinder to this we refrain from printing for
it is scarcely parliamentary. But the lesson of the episode
is that the war is still raging and Vancouver has shown
no symptom of awaking to the opportunity.
Perhaps after a little more feasting with Sir George E.
Foster, the Minister of Trade and Commerce, he might
at a future visit, in telling them "to get about and be busy
in producing something," particularize the potentials of
our timber, the world-wide market yearning to receive the
products, and thus hoist unto their feet the lethargic
yawners who console themselves that by talking of castles
in the air, castles will inevitably arise without the effort
either of making a foundation or laying a brick of a superstructure.
The advocacy of our industries, actual and potential,
is intended to bc continued and elaborated from time to
time along the lines of true development, in the interest
of the Province and its people, and entirely aloof from
all syndicates or proprietary interests whatever, though
to the enterprising founders of genuine industries we shall
give such co-operation as may lie in our power.
why the Commission, under the chairmanship of Sir
George E. Foster, sought for evidence only from stalwarts
of the Conservative party. This is why we protest against
the modus operandi of the Commission and against the debasing of the grcat and vital problem of Empire government to the level of a party issue in order to secure at
this crucial juncture when the sentiment of loyalty is hot
in every breast, a return to power for a period that will
certainly extend beyond thc declaration of peace and the
readjustments of the Empire and of its several parts.
If such a scheme were projected it should be counteracted by placing whatever government was returned to
power tinder an obligation to resign just as soon after the
war had terminated as the problem of the Empire's future
government became a vital problem and issue in Great
Britain and the Dominions tliat have so valiantly participated with thc mother country in the overwbelmment
of the Hun and tlie rehabilitation of Belgium as an independent nation.
DOMINION'S ROYAL COMMISSION
FEW people really knew until the reports of the proceedings appeared a day or two ago of thc momentous issues within the scope of the Royal Commission, and upon which it received presumably expert evidence.
One of these issues is the need for the consolidation of
the Empire and the creation of an Empire Parliament to
govern it after thc war. Upon this vital question the
Commission received evidence from Mr. H. Bell-Irving
and Sir Charles Hibbert Tupper, K.C.
If the Commission really desired to secure, for the illumination of its mind and tbe making of its report, suggestive views and opinions, it surely had a duty cast upon
it not only of seeking for them but of making its functions
as well as its sittings known, so that such views and
opinions might be tendered to it. As it was, its work on
this question at least, was a hole-in-the-corncr enquiry;
for however much we may esteem the two gentlemen who
tendered opinions as citizens and successful men in their
different spheres of life, no one could regard them as
among the category of experts on thc necessity for or
constitution of an Empire Parliament. Mr. Bell-Irving
was emphatic enough in his declaration for the necessity
of a parliament, but his views arc not arrived at first hand.
At best they arc reflected from others. Sir Charles Hibbert Tupper candidly admitted his own perplexity and his
inability to aid the commission, for he was obsessed with
the apprehensnon that '"distance from the centre" presented an obstacle which could not be overcome by consolidation or co-ordination.
The Pacific Seaboard���the Province of British Columbia���is peculiarly affected not only by the Empire's government, but by thc most vital function of government���
defence. There are men in this community who have devoted years of study to the problem, and have given utterance to their views on both the government and defence of the Empire, particularly as concerns the Pacific
seaboard of Canada. But the evidence of these men was
not sought by the Commission, and till war brought menace to our gates their views were excluded from the arena
of practicable problems or projects���as entirely theoretic,
or as being anticipatory of necessity by probably a century. Hence they were, like the exponents of them, relegated to the background in the scuffle and scurry for
quick-made wealth from real estate in the halcyon days
of the boom.
But the boom has passed and now the problem of government and defence has rearisen, not by a German menace merely, but by the fact that the German is kept from
the invasion of our Pacific coa'st through the British fleet,
in which Canada has no proprietary share, and to which
Canada has contributed nothing but promises.
When the Commission sat it should have secured expert
opinions in so far as they were procurable, regardless
of political parties, unless the question of the Empire's
future government, and Canada's part and place in it is to
be made a rallying cry for the approaching general election.   And this, we think, is what is in contemplation, and
HYPOCRITICAL IMPERIALISM
OUR observations on the uses to which the Royal Commission had been debasing its functions as a means
to an end in anticipation of an approaching .Dominion
election, recall the persistency with which the Empire sentiment of the people is used by some of thc most notorious machinators and manipulators to obscure their past
and present their new projects to the public in the gloss
and glow of loyalty. Mr. Bowser followed this plan when
he set off on his recent campaign tour in the Province,
and Mr. H. H. Stevens, his unmistakable ally and confederate in the Dominion Trust Company's scandal and other
equally reprehensible projects, took cover under the folds
of the Unio Jack immediately after the war broke out,
and he has doggedly refused to emerge therefrom or
to discuss any of the manifold local affairs in which he is
implicated under the pretext that the Empire and the Empire only can be discussed by him until after the war is
over.
At the meetings of Bowser and Stevens, alike, and of
others of the ilk, the unvarying course is to open the exordium of tbe speakers by fervent acclaims of thc glory of
Canadian arms, and of the heroic part they are taking in
the terrors,and horrors of the Universal War. Thus chivalry is awakened within tl*e breast of all, and surely it is
thc soul of chivalry to forgive the past, to grapple with
thc present, and to hdpe for the future. A most beneficent
attitude of mind to create in the people by such menias
Bowser and Stevens, whose public records have not only
tarnished the past, but produced wrongs which the present
cannot stay nor the future wholly cure. It would bc perfidy to themselves and to the generation which is to succeed them, if the people today under the illusions of hypocritical imperialism were to condone acts which could
not be, and have never been, defended by either of these
two stalwarts of the ruinous reign of thc speculator. The
public, we think, are inclined to be incensed by the blat-
ancy of the attempt to interpose Imperialism between
them and the machinators of the wrongs which this Province has suffered at their hands. In Bowser's case,
despite the frantic exertions, and the fervent appeals for
"just one term" of five years to consummate the "business policy" which he had inaugurated, the voters, mindful
of his past, knowing that his huge roll of belated legislation on an infinitude of subjects was but a propitiatory offering to outraged right and truth, and obedient to the
behests of their inner conscience���recorded their verdict
with an astounding preponderance against Bowser's continuance as the head or mouthpiece of this Province.
Well was it for them and for their children that they did
so; and well will it be if when next Mr. Stevens seeks
their support in a general election, they act with the same
sturdiness of soul.
The men whom people choose in free institutions to
represent them, are taken to reflect the character and standard of their constituents, and even the most chivalrous of
our fathers or sons or brothers who have yielded themselves to tlie sword in vindication of their country and of
a cherished principle of honor and right, would not ask of
those who remain behind till their return to stultify themselves by yielding to the blandishments of hypocritical
imperialism or to tarnish the name of the Province by
the longer continuance as their representative of Mr.
Stevens any more than of Mr. Bowser, whom already they
have consigned to oblivion, though the deeds he enacted
remain yet to be investigated.
remaining and available moment to gather up or destroy
the precious records of bis malign and malignant sway in
the Parliament Buildings and in the administration of the
Province.
BOWSER RUMINATES
NOTHING is more instructive than the sombre silence
that lias enveloped Mr. Bowser since his signal defeat at'the polls; and were it at all in his power
we should be speculating as to what scheme he was concocting for thc purpose of thwarting thc decisive verdice
of thc people, lie is not merely defeated, but vanquished,
and it is admitted by both the COLO'NIST and the
NEWS-ADVERTISER, who were to thc last his resolute
champions���resolute even in tlie face of inevitable defeat
���that the vote of thc soldiers cannot materially affect
the general decision of the people. Still in morbid silence he holds tenaciously to office. On what does he
ruminate?
Is it thc colossal pile of helter-skelter legislation which
he enacted before his fall'in tlie vain hope of appeasing
the wrath of an indignant public? Or is it on the ingratitude of the people who have repaid his long years of "good
deeds" with an evil kick of contempt and rejection at the
first opportunity; or is it on the best means of avenging
his unmerited overthrow?
We cannot penetrate the recesses of the Bowser-mind,
and cannot, therefore, answer the conundrum. But thc
fact faces us, nevertheless, that Bowser still holds on to
office though he is not one of the elected candidates; and
even if, by any contretemps, he*should secure a seat, he
cannot form and lead a new government.
We have had no legislature since the 1st of June. On
that day the then elected members ceased to hold their
seats, and the government, ceasing to be representative,
or to operate under the B. N. A. Act, became simply that
of a Crown Colony. Mr. Bowser, as a consequence of
this constitutional transition, ceased to be Attorney-General and became, perhaps without knowing it, the chief
law officer of the Lieutenant-Governor in the Crown
Colony of British Columbia���a status to which Mr. Bowser reduced the Province by running the legislature out to
the last moment, and by creating a hiatus between the
1st of June and the election of a new legislature.
That hiatus or chasm will, however, automatically fill
up on the completion of the election returns;'the legislative status of the Province will be restored; Mr. Bowser
will cease to hold his Crown Colony position; and the
Lieutenant-Governor must, under the constitution, form
a new government without either Mr. Bowser's consent
or his resignation.
There is, therefore, no need to clamour. Time itself
will solve the crux; and surely Mr. Bowser needs every I
OUR FISHERIES
THE startling falling off in the fisheries ol this Province, especially in the Fraser River, brought the
question of ascertaining the cause, and of providing
a remedy, before the Royal Commission which recently
sat in Vancouver under the presidency of Sir George E.
Foster. The proposal was made by some experts that
for the years 1918, 1919 and 1920 thc Fraser should be absolutely closed so as to allow the fish to recuperate. The
idea of this is tllat the fish have been persistently depleted almost to the vanishing point, not only in the
"good" but in the "spare" years, by methods which are
disastrous.. This is a poor or spare year; whereas 1915 was
"good"; but good as it was, it was not anything like as
luxuriant as it might have been if the least preservative
methods of conservation bad been adopted. Even last
year the falling-off was very patent to the fishermen.
They are not averse to closing the Fraser for tliree years
as suggested to the Royal Commission, but it is pointed
out such a procedure would be ineffectual to attain the
desired result of recuperation without the co-operation,
along the same line, of the American fishermen in the
Columbia waters; It is said that most of the Fraser River
fish pass from the Columbia, where the U. S. authorities
permit tbe cxterminative methods which are resulting so
disastrously. Owing to these methods the "Columbia is
gone," and the Fraser, if they are continued, is "going,"
too.   What a calamity!
It \z now some nine or ten years ago since a plan of
co-operative action1 was laid down between the Dominion
and the United States. Under this the fisheries on both
sides were to be closed in thc "poor" years. The Dominion backed up its compact by an Order in Council closing
the Fraser each alternate year; but as tbe United States
did not reciprocate or implement its side by government
action, the Canadian order was reversed, and since then
the devastation has gone on without restraint or regard
to the future. Now we are confronted with the annihilation of the fish of the Fraser,; and once again we are becoming anxious, and, it is to bc hoped, active. Surely
this is a case where a mutual commission between the
United States and Canada���two friendly nations, so to
speak���should promptly bc appointed to examine into the
calamitous facts and to provide a remedy for a disastrous
condition of affairs which affect one country as mucli as
another. Neither the fishermen nor the canners of either
side should be permitted to rob the future of what belongs
to it as much as it belongs to the present and
passing      day      and      year. Let      the      Dominion
government get active, and when they have arrived at
a co-operative solution and course of action with the
United States, let them then promptly turn to the Canadian fisheries of the North and institute a sound and sensible plan of conservation. And let them rigidly enforce
this, .and not rest satisfied with promulgating it.
THE RECRUITING SYSTEM
THERE seems to be something radically wrong in tlie
system of recruiting, and it must act antagonistically
to those who might contemplate thc joining of the
colors. Quite a large array of men are to bc encountered
along tbe streets, not en masse but in clusters of two or
three, who after having been accepted and in training,
have been at the crucial moment of the final medical examination before deportation overseas, rejected for some
physical defect. This is not a defect which had arisen
in the course of training, but it was there as conspicuously
on first enlistment as it was at the subsequent period���
perhaps it was even more conspicuous and infirmative
when thc doctor first passed it over as negligible, because
the training of say seven or eight months would have
a tendency to cure or remove it. In any case it formed
the blemish which has in an astonishing number of cases
caused the ultimate rejection of recruits-.
Now thus to receive a man who is willing to abandon
his civil pursuit and to yield himself to tbe service of his
Sovereign, and then to reject him after months of drilling
is not a generous requital of his loyalty. The freeing of1
him from further service does not restore him to the
position which he abandoned; and it might be many
months before he could find employment suitable to him
or equal to what he had left.
But the military authorities take no notice of the rejected man's loss or inconvenience. They merely communicate the medical decree of rejection and the demand that
forthwith he restore his outfit and equipment under the
menace of certain penalties for non-compliance. This
is peremptory, and very hard; for the first thing thc
average accepted recruit does is to dispose of all his
civic gear���clothing and general outfit of every kind���
in anticipation of his quick transfer overseas and to the
front. It is the front with all its confused allurements of
death or glory which fires him with zeal for the first enlistment. But when to the front he cannot go "by order,1'
he must resume liis civil garb. Where is he to get it?
Mow is he to get tbe position he has lost?
Now there is something radically wrong and highly obnoxious in thc system which produces such results as
these���not in isolated instances but in a large percentage
of the actual enlistments. Surely the medical staff and
the recruiting officers should not, in order to pamper
their pride by the quick aggregation of a stipulated number, pass perfunctorily men physically unfit, knowing that
when thc final weeding-out comes they will be rejected.
It is unheroic and dishonorable to do so; and those in
command of every corps, if they cannot rectify the wrongs
which' have been done, should take prompt and vigorous
means of preventing a recurrence of tbe gross injustice
that has in an astonishing number of cases been perpetrated.
CHINOOK
Breezes of Indignation
And Information
ANY PORT IN a storm; and the Port of Vancouver is
Mr. H. H. Stevens' haven of refuge. But the waves of
public wrath that have just overwhelmed Coxswain Bowser still rages furious in and around Burrard Inlet.
, * * *
A MAN'S PAST may be a poor prophet of his future.
But the people of B. C. did not think so in the case of
Mr. Bowser and took no chances on his future or his pro-
friises.
* * *
MAYOR McBEATH says he will run again, but with
all respect to his worship, we don't think it will be a run
���simply a walk-over, SATURDAY,    OCTOBER   7,    1916
THE  STANDARD
THREE
^/QCICTY
The drawing for the limousine given by Lady Tupper to the Red Cross
Society and other patriotic organizations has been postponed until further announcement.
* * *
Queen Alexandra has distributed
200 half-crowns among tlie poor flower girls to make up for the loss of
trade  on  Alexandra  Day.
* # *
Thc lion. Mr. and Mrs. Elidor
Campbell, who were occupying Mrs.
Tatlow's house on Ilaro street, moved on Saturday to Caulfield, where
they plan to stay the winter.
ft ft *
Mr. and Mrs. Jonathan Rogers arc
back in town after an absence of several weeks in Banff.
* * *
The Seaforth Cadets, who now have
their headquarters at 1237 Robson
street, are anxious to make their recreation rooms as attractive as possible *for the boys for the winter.
With this idea in view they are asking friends who may have any sitting room furnishings to spare if they
will telephone Mrs. Douglas Armour,
Seymour 7610; Mrs. B. D. Gillies,
Seymour 15, or Cadet Commander
Ian Cameron, Bayview 164<>L, when
the  things  will  be  gladly  called  for.
* * *
Mr. John Buckham, M. L. A., elect
for Golden, is in the city.
One of the most unexpected things
in relation to the employment of
women on tlie land has been tlie success of the London girl. Farmer'
acknowledge that she tackles all
kinds of farm work with more energy and enthusiasm than the young
woman native to thc soil, and is nearly always more skilful. Girls who
have never before been near a cow
before; in their lives quickly become
excellent milkers, and tlic town-bred
girl is altogether astonishingly adaptable on a farm. Tliis may in part
be due to the much criticised elementary education in council schools,
which has proved lhat it can at least
turn out girls possessing initiative
and resource. Probably it is also
partly due to the natural attraction
which farm life has for the London
boy or girl.
* * *
Mrs. John Hendry and Mrs. Eric
Hamber are staying at the Banff
Springs Hotel.
* * *
Vancouver people who have been
recent visitors to Qualicum Beach
include Mr. and Mrs. Bruce, Mr.
Worth and family,  Mr. and  Mrs. J.
D. McCormack, Mr. F. Norman, Mr.
E. E.  C.  Thomas and wife,  Mr. H.
W. Maynard, Mrs. Newborne.
* * *
London has now woman blacksmiths and horseshoers.
Mrs. David Spencer and Miss Charlotte Spencer of Victoria passed
through the city on Saturday on their
way home from Banff, where they
had been staying for some time at
the Banff Springs Hotel.
* * *
Dr. Byron S. Elliott has returnee!
to the city after an absence of several weeks in the East,
* * *
Dr. W. II. Sutherland, M. L. A.-
clect for Revelstoke, has returned
from  Victoria  on  his  way  home  to
the upper country.
* * *
Mrs. McMillan has returned to
Vancouver and has taken a suite at
Caroline Court after spending the
summer with Major McMillan at
Edgcwood Internment Camp.
tt tt tt
Mr. and Mrs. A. J. Whitcnack and
Mr. W. H. Whitcnack have given up
their suite in Englesea Lodge and arc
going to spend the winter in Los
Angeles.
* * *
Mrs. W. J. Mcintosh of Sherbrooke
N. S., is visiting her sister, Mrs. J.
H. Cameron, 4424 James street, South
Vancouver.
* * *
Mr. and Mrs. W. G. Ferris have returned to the city and have taken up
their residence at 2320 Second avenue
west.
Extraordinary Value
These New Fall Coats
at $10.00
���Including Models of Zabelines, Tweeds, plain cloths,
mixtures and plaids, showing belted and flare effects,
with convertible collar, patch pockets, richly trimmed
with buttons. Colors of green, grey, taupe, navy and
mixture shades, in sizes 14 to 20 for Misses, and 36 to
44 for Ladies. You will wonder at these extraordinary
values for $10.00.
Stylish Tweed. Serge and Poplin Suits
*^B^a**immmmmmmmMrimmma^^wmm^mmmi^mmmmmMMMmmuKVMmmm^^Bimmmi^waao2X3Sm.-*amB3
for $24.50
���The most sensational values of the seiison.   Smart Tweeds, Poplins ami Wool
Serges, fashioned into the la-test suit styles are here for your selection, moderate
lv priced at $24.50.    Come with belted and flare style jackets, with wide flare
skirt, in colors of navy, brown, green and black, and mixture tweeds, in all sizes
tor both Misses and Ladies.   Wonderful value  $24.50
The Newest Fur Styles
Supremely Luxurious
���Garments and pieces distinguished by their
elegance. Made of .the very finest pelts. The
latest models of the season. Fur coats with
the flare and swing so strikingly effective, and
belted styles for the more practical wear.
Quaint caplets, smart stoles, and neck-pieces
innumerable, each with muffs to correspond.
Priced attractively.   For instance:���
BLACK FOX TIES   $42.50 to $95.00
RED FOX TIE $35.00
GREY   FOX   SET    $97.50
HUDSON'S SABLE.TIES  $37.50 to $110.00
HUDSON'S SABLE MUFFS  ...$145.00 to $165.00
WHITE  FOX STOLE    $37.50
CROSS  FOX  TIE $95-00
BLACK WOLF TIES  $21.50 to $29.50
BLACK WOLF MUFFS    $27.50  to $32.50
HUDSON'S SEAL COAT  $175.00 to $225.00
NEAR SEAL COAT $125.00 to $150.00
Lieut. C. I. MacNutt, who left Vancouver witlh the 72nc$ Highlanders
and who was wounded at the battle
of Ypres, is in the city on two weeks'
furlough, and is visiting his brother,
Mr. S. G. MacN'utt, Jericho.
Mrs. Cartwright has given up her
house on Denman street, and has
taken up her residence at 1185 Georgia street during the absence of Dr.
Cartwright, who, since the beginning of the war, has been engaged in
military service.
�� * ���
The Parliamentary Procedure class
under the auspices of the Eqflal Franchise association and thc Pioneer Political league, will meet cm Tuesday
afternoon at 2.30 o'clock in the Tea
Kiltie inn, 634 Dunsmuir street. The
dSscussion will be led by Mrs. J. H.
McGill.
Ward Six branch of the Rc'd C'rofs
society has made arrangements to
hold a military whist drive of 27
tables in the Cambridge hall, Temple-
ton drive on Tuesday, October 10, at
8.15 o'clock, sharp. Prizes vvill be
given and a pleasant evening is anticipated.
* * *
Thc ladies of Chalmers Presbyterian church will conduct swimming
classes each Monday during the* winter season. The swimming pool is
the largest and finest in British Columbia and swimming can thus be
enjoyed1, under splendid conditions.
The classes start on Monday, and it
is expected that many ladies will ta'xc
advantage of the opportunity afforded.
A meeting of the Women's auxili-
ry of the Vancouver General hospital
was held this week in the Board of
Trade rooms, with Mrs. William Murray, president, in the chair. Mrs. A.
Coburn read thc minutes of the last
meeting which were passed. Mrs.
Brodie, the treasurer, also read her,
report, which was very pleasing. It
was decided to write and thank
Mr. Geo. Taggart for the delightful
concert given last Monday evening at
the hospital. Plans for "Our Day,"
the Red Cross tag day on October
19 were discussed and it was decided
that the auxiliary take the corner of
Pender and Granville streets and
Mrs. A. Coburn kindly consented to
act as convenor.
LIWtTED
Store opens at 8.30 a.m. and closes at 6 p.m.
Fashion's Favorite Fabrics
TO THOSE interested in new Fall Suitings
and Coatings, this display will prove specially attractive. It is in every way a representative exhibit of the season's most fashionable
and wanted fabrics. View the showing in the
dress goods division. You will find many materials that will appeal to you.
SUITINGS
PURE WOOL GABARDINE in a complete
range of fashionable colors, 42 inches wide, at
$1.50 a yard.
PURE WOOL ROXANA,
in African brown, Russian
green, new blue, wine,
navy or black; 42 inches
wide, at $1.50 a yard.
CHIFFON POPLIN in 44-
inch width in a very fine
weave, suitable for suits
or tailored dresses; 15
beautiful shades to choose
from; $1.95 a yard.
DIAGONAL SUITING, in
a 51-inch width, a splendid material for tailoring
purposes, shown in dark
costume colors, at $2.25
a yard.
ARMURE SUITING, in
navy, African brown,
prune, Russian green,
taupe or black; 50 inches
wide at $2.50 a yard.
PURE WOOL HEAVY
POPLIN���54 inches wide,
a high-grade material in
every particular, complete
range of colors; $2.75 a
yard.
WOOL BEDFORD SUITING���51 inches wide, possesses a distinct cord
weave all the fashionable
colors to choose from at
$2.75 a yard.
575 GRANVILLE
CHIFFON PANAMA
SUITING in a 54-inch
width; dark costume colors  at   $2.75   a  yard.
NAVY SUITING SERGE,
in 49-inch width, pure
wool and reliable dye, in
black or navy at $ 1.25
a yard.
FINE DRESS SERGE���In
navy, 51 inches wide, at
$1.25 a yard.
HEAVY SUITING SERGE
��� In 56-inch width,.pure
wool, fast dye, unusual value at $1 .75 a yard.
COATINGS
SILK PLUSH COATINGS
���50 inches wide, at
$5.75    to    $6.75     a
yard.
NOVELTY MOLE
CLOTH ���50 inches wide
at $5.75 to $7.50 a
yard.   '
BLACK ASTRACHAN
and Pony Cloths, 50 inches wide, at $4.50 to
$7.50 a yard.
WOOL COATINGS���In a
large variety of plain and
novelty weaves, such as
chinchillas, velours, diagonals, heather and flake
mixtures and plaid effects
in all colors, 50 to 54 inches wide, $1.95 to
$4 a yard.
Phone Sey. 3540
NEXT WEEK
AT THE THEATRES
fir BudsansBau (Tompanjs
iweonpoBflTep ie?o
WM1EW t.tUMBGi StOHO OMHISSI0MER
PANTAGES  THEATRE
Herbert Lloyd and Co. will present
a nifty act, which will make them the
friends of all Vancouverites who delight in laughing. Mr. Lloyd is one
of the best comedians upon the present day stage.
Reggiani and Vogliotti are two Italian singers who revel in the realms
of grand opera. They both possess
wonderful voices and should find no
difficulty in being appreciated by
Vancouver audiences.
Xeal Abel knows how to make himself funny, and then some. He does
a blackface turn, and has made a big
hit in all cities through his ability to
portray our colored brethren. Ward
ami Faye,#"the English Chappies,"
arc a c iuple of irresponsible entertainers who promise bright things.
The Four Rennees, four pretty girls,
are entertainers supreme who will
take all through five countries in four
minutes. Their act��is neat and full
of class, the result being that they
have made a big hit in every city.
* * *
PEG O' MY HEART IS
COMEDY  OF  YOUTH
Famous Play  Comes to Avenue for
One Week's Engagement
"Peg o' My Heart." which has the
reputation of being the greatest comedy of youth ever written, comes to
thc Avenue on Thanksgiving Day,
October 9, for one week's engagement, with matinees Monday, Wednesday and Saturday, where it will be
presented by the United Producing
Company, with Miss Dorothy La
Vern in the title role.
Peg is tbe daughter of an improvident Irishman and an aristocratic
Englishwoman, whose family disowned her as thc result of this marriage.
Following her mother's death, Peg is
reared by her father. As she comes
into the story the unusual methods
pursued by Peg's father in her upbringing is shown, but you like him
for it. A wealthy uncle, seeking to
undo the wrongs of tbe mother, pro
vides for Peg's future. It is arranged that she shall visit her aunt at
the family home of the Chichesters
in England, and the stern old lady
tries to teach Peg the proprieties and
make a lady of her. The free, untrammelled life with her lather has
left its mark on Peg, and she has
absorbed some of its humorous but
revolutionary views. It is, therefore,
not the easiest task imaginable lo
adjust Peg to the narrow conventions
of English society life. Her one
friend is Sir Gerald Adair, knov n -niy
to Peg as plain Jerry. When she
falls in love with J'rr> jlu
bravely enough to get or. hut l!. 1
rebellious habits cannol be ualear >
in ;i day. Peg's principal bur.'
her keen viewpoint inherited ir. m ;.
line of trish anccsti y. \ ��� se oi
humor is a treacherous sti
stone to conventional lociety Peg's
encounters with these conventions
make for fun. and ihc greatest Sp in-
taniety of the story, and as all terminates happily, the means serve t'i
increase thc swiftness and surety of
the play's movements.
Buoyant youth is the most appealing note of the story, and coupled
with a splendid simplicity and directness of purpose, with here and there
a tear to accentuate the interest, reveals the reasons for the remarkable
hold it has upon theatre-goers.
"GARDEN OF ALLAH" IS
SPECTACULAR PRODUCTION
Thc Garden of Allah, the big spectacular play made from Robert Hi-
chens' novel, by that author and Mary-
Anderson de Navarro, will be the attraction at the Vancouver Opera
House for a limited engagement of
three nights and matinee, commencing November 13.
This presentation of the dramatization of Hichens' novel is backed up
and fortified by tbe pictorial and realistic manner of the production. The
massive beauty of the sittings and effects is utilized to drive across the
footlights  thc  essentials of the  rom
ance between "Boris," the monk, and
his bride, "Domini."
The story of the play follows the
novel. The glowing and beautiful descriptions of tbe various scenes described by Mr. Hichens in the book
are closely followed. In fact, the
authors, managers and producers
spent many weeks to get thc desired
atmosphere. Many animals were al-
s.. brought ..ner���camels, goats, donkey.-, pige >ns and other live stock.
Seven car- are \:.<i:<\ in a special train
carr- ing this attract! in.
Perhaps the most interesting of al!
thc animate beings brought over arc
- ie Bi douins 0. ilie number of Jo
n ori The Bedouins, >r Arabs, are
the '<*i fightei ��� c" '. riders in all
Africa, Tlieir heroism has been
i 11 c: -1 -n man- claslu s with the
French troops before France eonquer-
,ii countrj To tliis day the
Arabs refuse l i be conquered and a
report of trouble in Morocco would
de| pulate the Aral* contingent now
with  tlie Garden   'f Allah.
Prominent among the members of
the cast arc Albert Andrass, William
Jeffrey, Howard Gould, James, Mason, Leo de Valery, Sarah Traux,
Pearl Grey and several others. The
company in its entirety consists of
over 100 and is exactly as seen for
one year in the Century Theatre,
New York city.
Donald, and Sandy were returning
home from an evening at a friend's
house,, when Sandy suddenly sat
down by the side of the path and
burst into heartbroken sobs.
Donald looked down at his weeping
friend.
"What ails ye, mon?" he asked.
'"Didna ye hae oceans o' whuskey?"
"It's no that," sobbed Sandy, "but
canna' mind the bride's bonnie wee
face."
"Haud yer whisht, ye gowk," retorted his companion, contemptuously. '"It wasna' a weddin'���it wis
a funeral." FOUR
THE STANDARD
SATURDAY,    OCTOBER   7,    1916
-:fantag?a ��h?ato:-
WEEK OF OCTOBER 9TH
"THE SQUIRREL'S BEST FRIEND"
HERBERT LLOYD & CO.
In "PEACHES IN PAWN"
REGGIANI & VOGLIOTTI
GRAND OPERA SINGERS SUPREME
NEAL ABEL, The Man with the Mobile Face
WARD & FAYE, "Sense and Nonsense"
THE   FOUR   RENNEES
"Through Five Countries in 20 Minutes"
PRICES:     Matinees, 15 cents.       Evenings, 15 cents and 25 cents
THE THREE RED TRUNKS
In the early part of 1910 three well-
dressed men arrived in Richmond and
registered at one of the -piict hotels
of that famous Southern city. Their
coming attracted no particular attention at the time and probably would
have gone unnoticed had it not been
for certain sensational events. The
men had the manners of successful
travelling salesmen and each carried
as part of his baggage an ordinary
steamer trunk.
On the night of the second day after their arrival the postoffice was
entered and robbed of $90,000 in cash
and currency. The back door of the
office had been forced open with
some tools stolen from a near-by
blacksmith's shop, the watchman
chloroformed and the three safes in
the office "cracked" in the most approved and workmanlike manner. It
was evident that the perpetrators of
the crime were no bunglers���they
knew their business. Soft soap and
nitroglycerine had been used, and so
effectively that no sounds were heard
outside the building.
The watchman, a faithful employee,
could throw no light on the mystery.
He sat in his accustomed chair, reading. Suddenly there was a queer
odor in his vicinity, and in a few
moments he was unconscious. When
he recovered his senses he was still
in his chair, but the safes had been
opened and robbed.
Inspectors in every section of the
country were instructed to be on the
lookout for the thieves, but, of course,
they had very little evidence to guide
them in their search. It fell to the
lot of Inspector Robert Hare to be
detailed to this most important case.
He made a careful investigation of
the postoffice building, and came to
the conclusion that the robbers had
worked what is known in the parlance
of the profession as the "plunge and
squeeze" method. He located the
stopping place of the three cracksmen while they were in Richmond,
and as soon as he had finished his
survey of the looted office he made
his way to the quiet hotel that had
harbored the unwelcome visitors.
The clerk at thc desk .was unable
to give him much information. He
remembered that the three men were
very well dressed and that they had
the air and manners of men of thc
PHONE! SEY. gOO
MacDONALD & HAY
Barristers, Solicitors, Etc.
1012 Standard Bank Bldg.
Vancouver, B.C.
CANADIAN
PACIFIC
BACK   EAST
SUMMER
EXCURSION
FARES
Tickets on sale daily,
June 1 to September
30, 1916.
Return limit tliree
months, not to exceed
October 31.
For full
particulars apply
to any
C. P. R.
Agent
world. His description was very
weak and as far as the purpose of the
police was concerned, of little value.
It was the baggage man of the hotel,
however, who first illuminated the
situation:
"If you call those three fellows
drummers, then I don't know my business. I've met nearly all the travelling men that ever came to this
town and I could tell at the first-
glance that they didn't belong to that
profession."
"Why?" asked Hare. "What made
you feel that way about it?"
"By their trunks," was the prompt
retort. "These felows each had a
small steamer trunk, and that's something rare in this neck of the woods.
If they were travelling men they
would have had Saratoga trunks or
great big sample cases."
"When did the trunks leave?"
"Promptly on the morning after the
robbery. The people of the -city hardly
had time to read about the looting of
the postoffice before the trunks were
on the train."
"And do you know where they
went?"
"Oh, yes," was the quick response,
"They were checked through to New
���York."
That was enough for Inspector
Hare. He took the first train'for the
metropolis and telegraphed to Terry
Curley to be sure to meet him at the
station. He hoped to be travelling on
the fast express to reach New York
before the trunks were claimed at
the railroad station. He also figured
that the thieves might believe discretion to' be the better part of valor
'and it was just possible that they
would leave the trunks in the baggage
room for twenty-four or thirty-six
hours. When the postoffice detective reached New York he turned to
his assistant with a smile:
"Terry," he said, "we're going to
join a new profession. We're going
to be baggage smashers for the next
few days. Meet me at the Pennsylvania station as soon as you can; and
bring with you a pair of overalls and
a jumper for each of us."
Hare proceeded to the station,
where he explained his mission to
those in authority. His assistant
joined him, and, attired in overalls
and cotton blouses, they began opera
tions in the baggage room. They had
not been there twelve hours before a
'red leather steamer trunk was taken
from one of the Southern trains and
deposited in the baggage room. It
was followed quickly by two others
that looked as if they might have
been its brothers.
The question was who would claim
the luggage. That was answered very
quickly. Three men, giving the names
of Frank Chester, Ferdinand Cunningham and Luther Dcik, called at the
baggage room and asked for the
trunks. The postal inspector had assistance at hand. He contrived to
get out of the office and manocuver
to thc rear of thc three men. He
signaled to the police, and then he
'tapped Dcik on the shoulder.
"It's not necessary for you to bother about the trunks. I'll see that
they are given all the attention that
may be needed."
The man looked at him in an incredulous way*. He was evidently
wondering if thc baggage smasher
had taken leave of his senses.
"Who the devil are you?" he demanded.
"I'm a postal inspector, and I want
you and your friends for that little
affair down in Richmond."
Dcik and his pals made an attempt
to escape but, finding themselves cleverly trapped^, surrendered. In due
course of time they were tried and
convicted with the aid of the three
red trunks.
Our Industrial Potentials���British
Columbia. Timber
WANTED ��� PUBLIC SCHOOL
graduates or high school students to
take shorthand or business courses
and pay for same from salary earned
after graduation. Only a limited
number accepted on this plan. Apply
at once in own handwriting to
Success Business College, Vancouver, B. C.
Great as the endowments by Nature
of British Columbia, thc Elysian Province of Canada, extending from the
Rocky Mountains to the Pacific, and
varied as those endowments arc, from
gold to fish, tlie premier place among
them, as a potential of industrial and
commercial success, must be accorded
to the superb forests of timber which,
covering her wide surface, arc all in
perfect maturity, awaiting the time of
their utilization.
That time has now come and seems
to have arrived most opportunely. It
is not only concurrent with the open-
ing-up of new ocean highways, the
establishing of trade routes, and the
rapid effecting of new trade alliances
between people widely severed by almost prohibitive distances, but it synchronizes with the realization of the
exhaustion and depletion, by others
in various parts of thc world, of those
identicalre sources with which British Columbia is bountifully endowed.
A commercial revolution, in fact, of
universal significance urges British
Columbia into the arena, and henceforth she must be not only a prime
purveyor to the world from thc marvellous resources of her forests, but
she must establish industries and become a competitor in the world's
markets to supply the, infinite commodities which she has facilities to
make and to ship, absolutely unequalled.
The forests of British Columbia are
estimated to cover 10,000,000 acres
and to contain fully 300,000,000,000
feet of timber. This is admittedly the
finest compact area of standing, merchantable, and perfectly accessible
timber on the American continent or
in the world today./ Growing denser
and larger than in other parts of the
continent, it surpasses in volume the
timber of all the rest of Canada and of
all the Western States of America.
Hitherto, however, it has not occupied its natural or appropriate place
and British 'Columbia, instead of being the leading shipper, has not been
exporting one-tenth of the timber
distributed* throughout the world from
Washington and other adjoining
Western States. Not one-seventh of
that sent to Australia, New Zealand
and other South Pacific parts of the
Empire; not one-thirtieth of that sent
to China, Japan, Mexico and Central
America; not one-fourth of that sent
to Africa, nor a half of that sent to
Great Britain has gone from British
Columbia, and of the aggregate timber imports into the principal centres of the world she has. contributed
only little more than one per cent.,
in spite of the fact that no country
is equally well equipped to dominate
the world's timber trade. ���
While from the east of both Canada and the United States distance
and difficulty of transit have almost
excluded British Columbia timber, its
nearest and most natural markets, the
Prairie Provinces, have been constantly invaded by the huge dumping
of surplus stock from all the lumber
mills of the Western Timber States.
But while British Columbia has
been thus confined in her timber operations largely to meeting local demands, the United States have been
opening up markets in every part of
tbe world, and now t,his Province is
forced into the arena as a competitor
under tbe most umbrageous combination of events.
First of all is the Panama canal.
Tliis grcat intcr-occan waterway not
only provides for timber the most
preferable of all means of transport
but it shortens thc sea distance between the East and West of Canada
and between tbis Province and thc
Atlantic ports of the United States
by nearly 8,000 miles. The Canal also
brings thc United: Kingdom within
8,600 miles of British Columbia. Thus
there are instantly opened up the
markets of Eastern Canada and of
the Eastern States, as well as those of
Great Britain, and in these arenas
there is tbe greatest demand for the
timber which British Columbia has
in unreduced profusion.
Concurrently with the completion
of the great Canal has also come a
scheme of widespread Provincial railway development. The Canadian Pacific, with the new Grand Trunk and
Canadian Northern Pacific, not only
give connection at different points
with the Prairie provinces���to which
the Western States, on account of
superior railway facility, have been
sending yearly as much as 500,000,-
000 feet of timber ��� but vthey also
form bases for subsidiary, intersecting and connecting lines at various
points and. in various directions. Already there are the Pacific Great
Eastern; the Vancouver, Victoria and
Eastern; the Kettle Valley, and several other Provincial and localized
lines in course of rapid construction,
and these, as well as the transcontinental,   all   penetrate   the    timber
areas, and thus aid in making available their matchless resources at the
most opportune time.
Supplementary to these transforming influences on timber exploitation
has come the realization of the fact
that not only have the Eastern Provinces of Canada and the Eastern
States of America been well-nigh exhausted, but the forests of the Western States have by reckless cutting
been depleted to a point where they
cease to bc formidable competitors.
More than this, the time has been
fixed for the complete exhaustion of
the L'nited States forests at the year
1920 by that most eminent authority,
Dr. Fernow, Director of the New-
York State College of Forestry in
Cornell University. This prediction,
made some years ago, while the American timber area was greater and
consumption less than it is today, is
being ratified by unmistakable evidence and by many transpiring events.
British Columbia with an already
enfeebled and constantly weakening
competitor, must assume the role of
supplying the markets of the East of
this continent, not only in Canada,
but in the United States. She can
reckon also on controlling the markets of China and Japan, whose demands increase year by year, those
of the populous domain of Mexico
and other Equatorial countries whose
lands are devoid of such timber
growths as enrich this Province;
those of Australia and New Zealand
and other Empire Possessions in the
Southern Seas; those ��� of the West
Indies and various parts of South
America and Africa, to which the
Western States send about 600,000,-
OOO feet of timber annually; and last,
but by no means least, the immense
markets of Great Britain itself must
more and more draw upon the resources of British Columbia.
There are many reasons, besides
the reducing power of competition,
why British Columbia must dominate
the timber trade of the world.
Stumpage values are at the present
time from ISO to 250 per cent, higher
in the United States than they are
in this Province; and while it is almost a certainty that an inter-Empire
system of preferential trade will, in
the form of a Zollyerein, be one of
the immediate effects of the pending
European war, British Columbia, by
the use of British ships, can consign
her timber products more economically through the Panama Canal than
can the lumber exporters of the Western States. This will be of enormous
effect in gaining control of the Eastern markets of this continent.
The best timber growths are west
of the Cascade Mountains, or a distance of not more than 170 miles
from the Coast, and as far north as
the Skeena River. Here the famous
Douglas fir flourishes in its greatest
splendor and majesty, frequently attaining 300 feet, with a diameter of
11 or 12 feet. But the lumberman
appreciates it most at about half these
dimensions. It often yields 500,000
feet B. M. per acre; but estimating it
at one-tenth of this, its wealth-creating powers approach the fabulous
Red Cedar flourishes in the same
areas as a compatriot. Its girth is
greater, but its height is less than
the Douglas fir. The East prizes it
highly for all kinds of furniture and
furnishings requiring durability and
excellence of polish. Among the
other great trees of thc Province arc
the Yellow Cypress and several varieties of spruce, whose uses vary from
heavy construction to the making of
pulp; and here it may bc said that
this Province possesses material for
the manufacture of paper and pulp
ample to supply the markets of the
world. Already over $13,000,000 have
been invested in the industry, which
can be reckoned upon to rise and
expand with the growth of the population and the ever-augmenting demands of the world. This is one of
the great industrial enterprises which
the Province is equipped to sustain
and to carry to unrivalled success,
having thc material in abundance to
manufacture, the water for generating power, and harbors, naturally
formed and denting her coastlines at
places most accessible from the inevitable scenes of coming activity.
Into the arena of industrial activity everything urges British Columbia, and the investor in her timber resources may be assured that the
trend of prices must ever be upward.
because the world's demands and necessities must continue to concentrate around them as the competition
of others diminishes and their sources
of supply are reduced.
The Province will promptly rise
to the great destiny for which it is
equipped with every element of success; and an era of progress and development is ahead, not only in the
exportation of lumber,    but   in    the
manufacture for world-wide markets of an infinitude of commodities
hitherto made by nations importing,
in the first place, the raw material
which this Province itself possesses
in profusion.
Timber being a commodity of universal demand, as an investment it
has a permanency of character all its
own, and being reproductive, it surpasses all the minerals in monetary
potentials and in the magnitude of
its certain results. In it capital,
which   will   run   wild   for   investment
just as soon as the din of the European struggle terminates, will seek
for and will find a safe and profitable
resting-place, and fortunate is he who
reads the signs of the times aright,
and, seizing the opportunity, acquires
an interest in British Columbia's
great heritage and immense producer
of wealth, whether in its crude or
rough state or manufactured and distributed to the world in thc infinitude
of artistically designed and highly
polished commodities into which it is
pre-eminently  fitted  to bc converted.
News Items of the Province
A 17 Ib. brick of gold was sent
down from the Lome mine to the
Bank of B. N. A., at Lillooet, last
week. This is the third shipment from
this mine in the last couple of months
and there are tons of gold still left
in this property only waiting to be
dug out. This mine has proved to be
wonderfully rich and Mr. Noel, the
owner, is to be congratulated on his
good fortune.
* * tt
At the Prince Rupert Exhibition,
Hazleton was accorded first prize for
a district exhibit of minerals.
* * *
Hazleton at the same exhibition
won third place in field and garden
exhibits.
* * *
Thc long tunnel on the "Rocher
de Boule is reported in 1000 feet, and
is expected to ship the ore very soon.
* * *
On the Amargosa group, E. P.
Spalding has new camps under construction.
* * *
The well-known Owen Lake group,
controlled by Harris Bros., will be acquired by F. H. Dakin, representing
New York' capitalists. Work is to
commence without delay.
* * *
Jack Mullan and Jim Beaman have
returned to Manson Creek, to resume
work on the Steele-Mullan property.
The old channel, which has yielded
.considerable gold this season���$2200
was taken out in 18 days���was reached by tunnelling 760 feet.
�� * *
The Trail Electrolytic Copper Refinery, which has been in operation
for a few weeks, will shortly begin
the shipment of electrolytic copper.
* * *
The Coast Copper Co. is the name
of a new company just gazetted to
acquire 31 copper claims in the Quatsino district of Vancouver Island, on
which already some $200,000 has been
spent in development.
�� * *
In the Slocan, East Kootenay,
Boundary, Similkameen, Lardeau,
Revelstoke, Golden, Nelson and Sal-
mo and up coast sections, the stimulus to mining is distinctly felt, and
the activity is noticeable. Not only
is this so, but it is worthy of note
that the mining now being carried on
is of a more permanent character than
in the early days. Thc ores now being mined more  than  the  public���it
is being made a manufacturing business, as it should be.
* * *
Experienced  mining  men  say  that
they have never seen more activity in
the mines around Ainsworth, Kaslo
and in the Slocan district itself than
at present.
* * *
After being idle ten years, the Paradise mine, Windermere, is once
more shipping to Trail, eight teams
hauling ore to the railway,, the mine
now employing twenty men.
ForJSale
$150 CASH
Through their representative
going to the War, the famous
Australian firm of Trewhellas
want to immediately quit 6
(SIX) of their world-renowned
Tree and Stomp Grabbers
THEY WILL TAKE
$150   EACH   CASH
for the full equipment, which
waa selling at $200 before the
big rise in materials. Otherwise���we are instructed to return them to -Australia if NOT
SOLD WITHIN 60 DAYS.
THIS IS A VALUABLE
OPPORTUNITY for anyone
wanting the world'a beat clearing machinery.
Send CASH $150 and Order
Now to
The Campbell
Storage Co., Ltd.
857  BEATTY  STREET
VANCOUVER, B. C
Classified Ad?ertising
FLORISTS
BROWN BROS, ft CO., LIMITER
Seedsmen, Florists, Nurserymen, 41
Hastings St. E��� and 782 Granville
Street, Vancouver, B. C
WATCHMAKER
10,000 WATCHES and CLOCKS
wanted to clean and repair at the
factory, 438 RICHARDS STREET.
LONG DISTANCE
TELEPHONING
IS CHEAP
180 words can be spoken in one minute, speaking slowly and distinctly.
Take the Long Distance Telephone rate to any
point and compare the price per word with other
means of communication.
You will find the cost low.
B.C. TELEPHONE CO. LTD.
,���___., SATURDAY,    OCTOBER    7,    1916
THE STANDARD
FIVE
The Market Price of a Man
The Tampico rolled and tossed on
the swell of a "norther" east of J.'.jn-
ama. The mist and rain drove drearily over the deck, and below in the
smoking-saloon half a dozen 0 i the
meagre passenger list were sn joking
and telling tales, as men will 'Jo who
go down to the sea in ship.s. The
Isthmus was down below th z horizon
by twenty-four hours, Cubr, had been
the last land sighted, and the sallow-
faced Vermonter, thc ec ;ntre of the
group about the centre table, had relapsed into silence af'.cr his last
story. Thc six smoked ,n, most of
them with their thoughts far beyond
the dip of the sky-dine, while they
watched the swayin g shadows of the
centre lamp. It writ a company tired
of hearing their civm stories and the
sound of their own voices, who had
told all they had to tell, and who
would welcome,; anything of interest
that might break the increasing monotony of a stormy sea-voyage and
the ceaseless, whirl of the screw.
Presently the Vermonter blew out
three rings, of smoke, took bis cigar
from his rnouth and said, very dreamily, with his eyes half-shut, 'Suppose?" as if he were going to ask a
question, and then stopped and shut
his mouth tight. There was hardly
a stir in reply and the questioner
seemed relieved that there was not,
for lv; smiled softly, apparently to
himself, and then, as if to change the
subject, threw up his arms over his
head and yawned, remarking, "My
but this is getting slow Does anybody know where we are?"
"Is that the best you can do?" replied the Englishman opposite. "I
have a brighter idea: Let's all go
and sit on the stern and keep that
confounded screw under water."
A voice sounded from out the shadow in the corner, addressed to the
first speaker. "1 don't believe that's
the best he can do; what was that
iimile for? If you have an idea it's
a penal offence to sit on it and not
let it out here."
The Vermonter smiled again. "It
was wheels���just wheels," he said.
"I have them now and then���queer
thoughts and questions that pop into
my head, from where I don't know.
This one was rather a moral or a
psychological one."
"If it's moral, let's have it; it will
be a change," came back from the
shadow.
The Vermonter sat up a little
straighter . "Well, as I said, I don't
know what suggests these queer
thoughts to me, but it suddenly occurred ,_to me whether a man has his
price in all things; whether a fellow,
if he were approached in the right
way, could be bought for anything,
business or politics, love or loot. How
far will a man barter his soul for the
pesos of his 'castles in Spain?' Is it
even chances that everyone has his
price, given any reasonable circumstances?"
"By Jove it seems so sometimes,"
broke iu  the  Englishman*.
"A peculiar situation occurred to
me a moment ago," continued the
speaker. "Suppose"���and be leaned
over and fixed his eyes on the face
of the man opposite���"that that door
should open and a man come in and
make the offer that he would pay
any man here bis own price if he
would consent lo marry at midnight
tonight any woman that should be
brought to him, 1 wonder bow many
of us would set a price and how
high?"
The uniqueness of the idea appealed
to the group and Ihey laughed.
"That is a queer one," came again
from the corner, "and I bet I can tell
where it came from���from the apple-pie you had at supper."
"What motives could a man have
to make such.an offer?" inquired the
Englishman.
"Oh, I am not going into motives;
he might have fifty. It's another question I am thinking about."
"Don't you place any restriction
on the species of woman he might
bring?" asked a young engineer, who
was going down into Peru.
"Well, yes. Suppose the offer was
conditioned so that it must be a
white woman and under twenty-five
years of age; that makes it more
specific."
"You leave him a broad field," suggested the Englishman. "If we all
were sure she would be a Baltimore
belle with ten thousand dollars a year
in her travelling-bag the offer would
be no gamble. And, of course, it's
no divorce, and a man must support
her properly and live with her as man
and wife."
"No Dakota deal, eh?" came from
tbe corner.
"I don't know but a fellow might
do pretty well if she had any good
qualities," began the Englishman.
"He might take her to the Continent
and educate her properly, you know;
show her a bit of the world, and rub
off her rough corners. She shouldn't
have many fixed habits before twenty-five that couldn't he overcome.
1 know of a much similar case, only
reversed���of an old duffer, a bachelor,
who had money and was afraid some
relative he disliked might get it after his death. One day, while sitting in his room, the fear came on
him so hard tllat he went across the
street and made an offer to a girl iu
a news-stand���a plain business offer
���that lie would settle his money on
her if she would marry him. And she-
did, and lived with him for three
years, when he died, and she went
North and married a farmer-lad, the
love of her youth. Of course that
wasn't such a gamble. If a man
could only get a glimpse of her before he accepted, you know, he could
gauge bis price."
"That is the vital point, I know,"
broke in the Vermonter, "but, as I
said, you can't have prunes and cake,
too. Now, the only way to solve the
question is to bring it down to our
own selfish selves. Here we are, six
men, three hundred miles to sea,
alone, and it will be a burst confidence���that's all. We'll jtu. raise
the curtain for a moment on those
innermost heart-strings wc hear a-
bout, which wc never finger in public,
It will bc a study in human weakness.
But no Sabbath-school touches���only
honest, frank disclosures; and if there
are any married men they can be
excluded."
He swung his chair around suddenly to face the Englishman, saying:
"You're first at confessional. Would
you, and what price?" The Englishman put his head back and broke into
a hoarse laugh. The rest joined in
with him.
"What is this���a thumub-screw act?
And must I give up?"
'"Oh! nothing compulsory, but it
may be the solution of an interesting
moral problem. Haven't ydu sat in
a city window sometimes and watched
the crowd hurry by and wondered
what such and such a man did for a
living, and if he were honest, or whether he was black with sin inside;
or whether the man in the high hat
was really as good as he looked, or
whether he would perjure himself for
a few hundred lollars? Haven't you
done that? Why! I have wasted
hours that way."
"Yes, that's interesting," broke in
the Englishman. "Well, here is a
chance to know, not guess; and I am
sure nothing said here will get beyond the cabin."
The idea was original, and gave
promise of interest. The man in the
corner said, "Well, why not? and let's
have a 'burst,' as onr friend here
says."
There was a general nodding of
heads amid clouds of smoke. The
heads were rough, as a whole, all
dark and sunburned and some scarred.
They had all tasted success and then
failure afterward, each in his own
way1. They had, struggled through
forty years only to face the required
thirty more and the same uncertain
future, and they knew what a comfortable income in old age would
mean. A ragged scar ran from right
eye to ear on the face in the shadow,
a memoir of a Brazilian rebellion;
the engineer has tasted months of
r.inama fever, and the Englishman's
face was copper-colored with the heat
of five East Indian summers with the
"2nd of Bombay"���all were gentlemen of Dame Fortune's school; "lived
under their hats," as one had put il.
Perhaps it was hardly to be expected
that they would answer otherwise
than they did. Everyone gave a price
save two���one a Lutheran minister,
married, who remarked, with some
humor, that he had been sold some
time before. The second was a silent, strongly proportioned man, with
a dark beard, who had said little since
leaving New York, and who was apparently asleep, with his half-smoked
cigar on a chair beside him. He was
not awakened. The Vermonter tore
a page from his note-book and jotted down the prices as they were
given, with an occasional low whistle
as one ran high or low. The sums
ranged from $15,000,000 clown to
$700,000. with various specific requests that the payment should be in
United States Government bonds,
Bank of England stock, or gold coin.
The Englishman said he would halve
his price if she proved to be English
and had a mild temper. It came to
the Yankee's turn.
"Now, father confessor, your evil
thoughts," said the man in the corner, "and on the hope of your soul,
no hypocrisy."
"Well, I honestly believe you are
all too high," said he. "You have
prepared for thc very worst, and she
might be far from the worst. There
might be other reasons for a man
making such an offer. With ten thousand dollars a year a man with mod
erate   tastes   can   see   something   of]anyway, and I am curious to tee the
the  world.    If she  were  too  bad  he I woman."
could buy himself a cottage in South-      "If she comes of her own free will
era   France  or  bury   himself  in    the  she is either crazy    or    hypnotised,"
Scottish   Highlands.       If   she   had  a|put in the engineer,
hobby   he   would   have  all   the   time      "A compliment     to    me,    surely,"
ame from the Vermonter.
It was nine in thc evening then.
with tliree hours to wait ��� hours
which passed amid the wildest con-
iecturei a> to the reasons of the offer.
he wanted in which to ride it.    If he
wanted  hunting  he   could   have  it  in
every clime,  in  turn.    That is where
I would come in strong.    If she was
not  a  feature  at  a  five-o'clock   tea.
she  might  bc  a  good  companion   in
Abyssinia.   Anyone white to talk with  who the stranger was. and what da
would   go   there.     And   then,   a-   ,,-.,   ,,,* w,,n,aI1 he v,,,u|,; bring
friend   over   there"���nodding   at    the-      -i- ,   - ,        ,
..    ,. , . ���        "" I    I en minutes before twelve the pa
r.nglislmiaii��� says,  a   man   ought   to!,    i .-. -i        ,-       *��,    ..
.      .. ,, ,   ���"*���"'      Ity left the cabin,   ihe Vermonter wai  would  do anvtlnng for her. and did
ue able to mould a woman s character   .��� t- .    . ,    ,   -.      .       , ,      ,,. ,
uidciLio   t|u. centrc  f|KllrL.   am] t|;ey    marched   She  has  been  an  invalid  for
under   twenty-five,  and  certainly   she  ������ Mch Bide ���f hjm  M ;-",,,,���,���, ,;,.,,   .���;,,,.  Vm,\ ,���' a  head  trouble, subject
18 not  too  old  to educate.     You  are  hjm   (���   his   execu,       Someone   at-   to   fit-   of   mild   insanity,   forgets   ev-
��L!Z        ,'        ' ���     "Iy  '"'''   ;" tempted humor, but the silence foi- erythtng, but not dangerous,
$200,000, good money.
"You're   a   bargain-day
rest returned to smoke and conjecture.
The next evening it all came out
through the Yankee as the five were
clustered around a table in the Americanized bar-room of the Hotel
Manacco, Colon. It was told in his
short, quick manner thus:
"You see it was this way. The
stranger's name is Phillips; be was a
cashier OI a bank somewhere up in
Massachusetts, He lost his wife.
got to speculating, and lost his savings. His ciik- dream in life is his
daughter,   IO  the  minister   says.     He
man     all
right," laughed the engineer.    "Mark-
eel down to '29,' eh?"
"And   haven't   you   forgotten,"   put
I. wing   his   remark   betokened   little      "When he lost his money be was
encouragement   for   further  attempts. (afraid   she   might   want   for     some
The main  saloon was free from  pas- thing   ami   borrowed     some     of   the
sengers at  that hour.    As  they  dug- I ank's.    You know that's the  way  it
tered round tbe centre table the door always begins.   Well, he got to spec-
in thei minuter, edging his chair near- of lhe la(lics. cal)i���       nM an,, ^ ^ n m^  .
er,    to  make  an   allowance   for   the ltfBnger  carae  ������  leading  a  girl  by
ruining of your own life, not to say the hand   the ,.vo fo���owe4, ,)v ,he
anything of your soul, by a loveless  minister.
marriage."
"I am frank enough to admit,"
smiled back the Yankee, "that any
man who would make such a bargain
would deserve no love, and so deserve no sympathy for its loss."
A cabin-boy came in to inform the
minister that be was wanted on deck.
"I am glad to say that I am not foolish enough to take you seriously, gentlemen," and he nodded and smiled,
and went out.
The interruption broke in on the
revery of each man. Several were
throwing away their cigars to get
fresh air on deck when the sleeper,
the man with the heavy dark beard
and the tired look in his eyes, opened
them suddenly and looked at the
Vermonter, and then said quietly, "Do
you mean to say, sir, that you will
marry any woman any man will bring
to you tonight for $200,000, if she is
white?"
The apparent '.eagerness of the
speaker, despite his quiet tftne, caused
the Yankee to look at him curiously.
The rest of the company turned where
they stood.
"I did not know you were listening
to our confidences, sir," replied the
latter. "Yes," he continued lightly,
"that was my offer, provided she is
under twenty-five years. Have you
a few bargains at that price?"
The bearded man glanced quickly
away toward a port-hole, and then
slowly brought his eyes back to rest
on the Yankee again.
"How much are you in earnest,
sir?" he asked. "What if I make you
the offer now?"
The Vermonter hesitated, and then
glanced  hurriedly at his companions.
"What do you mean?"
"Precisely what I said." And then,
after a pause, "I have asked you a
question, and am waiting for your answer."
"Well." came the reply, with a
growing color in the speaker's face,
as he felt the eyes of all upon him,
"I made that offer, and I guess I shall
have to stick to it.    Yes; I would."
"Then, sir," continued the questioner, rising to his feet, "1 make you
that offer. I will give you $200,000
to marry the woman 1 bring to you at
midnight. She will be of the white
race, and tinder twenty-five years of
age. You shall care for her and support her properly as long as you live:
and 1 need not wait for your answer,
for you have already accepted my offer in the hearing of these gentlemen. I add one provision, that at the
first opportunity you deed all this
$200,000 to be payable to your wife
on your death, in case she outlives
you.    Do you agree to that?"
The Vermonter mumbled a "Yes"
in his astonishment. "I shall expect
you in the main saloon at twelve, and
I invite these gentlemen as witnesses;
and I go now to engage thc minister
to conduct the services."
He took two steps toward thc door
and turned and looked back at the
second party of the contract, who was
trying to gain self-possession enough
to say  something.
"I don't know, sir," he began,
"whether this is a practical joke.or
whether someone is crazy, but I am
going to see it through. I should only like to ask in what form the money
is and to stipulate that I see it before the ceremony."
"The money is largely in National
Bank Bills, sir, and the rest is in United States Government bonds, and
you can choose any one of these gentlemen to count and hold the money
during the ceremony and deliver it to
you afterward." He bowed and left
thc cabin.
The faces he left behind were a
study in human perplexity, and the
Vermonter not the least of all. His
only remark was, "Crazy or a queer
one, sure."
"Will you stick to the agreement?"
inquired three of the men at once.
"Sure," said he, pulling himself together    "We will see it to a finish
If there had been any grave doubts
as to the character of the woman he
would bring, and there were surely,
they vanished at the first glimpse of
her. She was clothed simply but becomingly in a white dress of light
material. She was far from plain, but
what stamped her for a woman the
opposite of the expected, was the
sweet, sad expression that followed
eveiy change in her face. With head
erect, which was crowned with a
wealth of jet-black hair, she came in
with confidence, while her black eyes
searched the faces of those before
her. Something in her trim figure
and complexion betokened a strain
of Spanish blood.
With somewhat the feeling of intruders the group about the centre
table moved back and left the Vermonter standing out alone. He was
a good-looking man as Xew Engenders go���tall, with broad shoulders,
and an honest, sometimes almost
boyish, expression which was in
strange contrast to his big, bony
form. The girl came straight toward
him with the question, "Is this he,
father?" (there vvas almost an audible sigh of relief from every man at
the word "father") and then put her
hands simply on the Yankee's shoulders and looked up into his face. He
winced perceptibly. It was probably
the last thing expected. "You will
be kind to me when we are married,
won't you, and be patient with me?
I am such a poor bargain at any price,
but it all means so much to a girl,
you know," and then she seemed to
search his very soul as if she would
force him to tell her.
He returned her gaze for a moment
and then almost roughly pushed her
aside and faced her father. "Look
here," he said; "this is rot. Is this
your daughter or not? and if she is.
why are you crazy enough to want to
marry such a woman as she is to a
man whom you know nothing at all
about? You deserve State-prison for
the thought of it; and you"��� whirling on the minister ��� "deserve a
thrashing for agreeing to such an
outrage!" Then as if suddenly realizing the presence of the woman, he
stretched out bis hand toward her as
if he would apologise for his language.
"Then vou refuse to marry her?"
broke  in  the bearded  man.
"ME  marry  HER,  such  a  woman,
under   such   circumstances I     1   never
thought you would bring thai kind���
anyone   whom   you   would     have   i
pity."
"But 1 have your word for it,"
broke in the bearded man again, ver*
much  agitated!
"Word bc hanged; it is a privilege
to be able to lie in a case like thi>. I
tell you 1 shall not marry that girl,
and no one else shall here, under
these circumstances."
There was a pause, the two men
facing each other, the girl with a look
of perplexity in her big black eyes,
standing by her father. Then the
stranger dropped suddenly into a
chair, buried bis face in his arms, and
almost sobbed, "It is just as well; yes,
better. I know it is better," and then
broke down entirely.
It was a long, awkward, miserable
silence that followed, with everyone
mystified, all uneasy, while the girl,
with her arms around her father's
neck, tried to quiet him, and he sobbing in a hard, pitiful way as only a
strong man in anguish can.
The minister was the first to act.
He went to the pair and led then-
back to their state-rooms. He was
seized upon ruthlessly by all on his
reappearance and tlie Yankee demanded what it all meant. For a-
while he stubbornly refused, to give
any explanation, and then finally, being half-forced into it, consented to
tell all he knew to the Yankee, as he
was the one most entitled to an explanation, but on the condition that
it was to remain a secret until after
their landing at Colon. So he led the
Y'ankee   to  his  state-room,  and   the
am', lost more, and finally had to face
the matter squarely. He knew the
directors would discover him in time,
anel the thought of what would hap-
pcrj of his daughter, with him in
State-prison and she with no near
relatives or friends, made it harder
than ever. He had a horror of homes
and asylums, so he took $250,000 more
from the bank's funds, got some excuse to leave town, and tried to reach
South America, where his wife had
come from, before the loss was discovered, and lose himself, with the
girl, where they could live quietly
and be could care for her. There was
an old servant who did have an idea
of bis stealings, an old butler of his,
but wha had stuck 'to him through it
all. and he found out where he was
going, followed him to New York, and
saw him buy his ticket. The directors caught on to the trouble the day
he left, but were too late to catch
him at the steamer. The old butler
telegraphed him a message to Sandy
Hook and they took it out in a boat,
telling him they knew where he was
going, and would be down there to
take him when he arrived. So you
see he has known he has had no
chance since then, and he was half-
crazy wondering what he would do
with thc girl. There seems to be
some strange companionship between
the two, and they confide in each
other in everything. Anyway, be confessed everything to her before they
had been out a day. and told her why
he was taking her to South America,
and not for her health, as he had told
her before. It was a terrible shock
to her, because he was so much to her
she tried to live it down, and promised to stick to him, come what may.
She must be a great woman and he
must have a terribly strong influence
over her. The parson said he had
heard him in his cabin crying aloud,
and the girl trying to comfort him.
Well, the night we talked that nonsense in the cabin the idea came to
him as a possible chance of caring
for her and saving her money (he
called it her money). He knew she
would lose it. as it was. and if she
married and he could bind her husband by an oath he might provide
for her and perhaps save tlie money,
too. as they would not be liable to
search everyone on the steamer, and
the husband might get out of tne way
with it while they were searching
him. It was a crazy idea but it shows
what a man will jump at if lie has been
driven about crazy on ,c problem and
can'l   a dve   it,  and    then    suddenly
seems to see a way out. He told the
parson, too, that he knew of my family name in Vermont, in a business
way, and knew we were not at all
bad. and so it did not seem such an
utterly wild chance. His one thought
was of her and to have her live properly. His influence was so great
that he got her consent to it. He
placed it on the ground of self-denial
for him, for he knew he could not
win her in any other way. He told
her that she must do anything on
earth to save that money if she ever
hoped to get him off from imprisonment or to keep him alive if he was
imprisoned, for he felt he could not
stanc! a long sentence. That was the
i thing be did, to try to force
her into such a marriage on a lie.
Shi- is a madonna all right, for she
finally consented on those grounds
that the money should be used to either get him free or to make it easier
for him while serving his sentence.
She consented to steal for his sake."
"And that is why she came in so
willingly to marry a fool like me;
and that fellow who met him on the
dock is one of the Government detectives here and is going to take him
North tonight with the money."
"And how came the parson to be
mixed up in the steal?" inquired one.
"Well, he said Phillips confessed
everything to him that night and told
him it was the only way to save the
girl. The parson said he had never
heard of such a pitiful case. He took
two hours to make up his mind, and
finally consented, on the condition
that the girl was perfectly willing, and
she said she was."
"He ought to have his conscience
filed; it's rather dim, I should say,"
added the  engineer.
"And"���here the Vermonter hesitated and took one or two quick puffs
at his cigar and colored a little���=-
"and I guess I'll go North, too, tonight, and see the girl through. I
think I shall take her up to the old
family place to my mother. She
hasn't any children with her now and
she would welcome her, and the country would be peaceful and quiet for
her."
The Englishman looked at the
speaker a moment and then, as if
from a sudden impulse, raised his
glass. The others followed his example.
"To the cleanest gentleman ever
bought," he said, and then added, "and
the cheapest." and drank off his
glass.
"Yes," said the Vermonter, "a thousand times too cheap."
Phone Highland 137
Grandview Hospital
1090 VICTORIA  DRIVE
VANCOUVER     -     B.C.
Medical : Surgical  : Maternity
Rates   from  $15.00   per   week
&tM^f IS93 '��� '   Rital'Smic
j CENTER" A'HANNA IlMITSr)
, New, Lo.:,cion, 1049 GeocsU'Su-tce1, ofcxaife nrw
Y.M.C A. /' ; . " ,    ���
.Oi����D��.��nJ nwii--     . -..:,���: :>(, ,sw. 2��
HOW DO YOU
BUY BREAD?
Do you ask for, and get, just a "loaf of bread," or do
you, like the wise, discriminating buyers, order
SMAX and
SUNLIGHT
"THE   BETTER   BREAJDS"
These are wholesome, nutritious���made in a modern,
sanitary bakery���in every detail as good bread as
conscientious effort can make them.
Every loaf crisp, tender, delicious���done to a turn.
If your grocer cannot supply you, phone Fairmont
443 and we'll get it to you prompt.
HAMPTON-PINCHIN
Bakers of Better Bread SIX
THE STANDARD
SATURDAY,   OCTOBER   7,    1916
a<
m
���
���
���
���
Bicycle Notes & Wanderings
By   Rover
'Hhc annual congress of the Dominion Good Roads Association will be
held in Winnipeg next February, according to the announcement made
by the association recently. Great interest will he taken in this convention
it is expected, because of the government and municipal proposals
throughout Canada to arrange for
highway projects immediately after
the war in order to provide employ-
Blent for tens of thousands of soldiers who will be returning after the
(termination of hostilities.
If all the plans are carried out, Ca
nada will have not only a trunk road
extending from coast to coast, but a
network of improved highways will
be found in.cvery corner of the country.
* * *
For thc first time the Toronto authorities have resorted to juvenile assistance fur the maintenance of law
and order. Through the adoption of
a recent plan, one hundred and forty
school children of an apparently responsible type have been chosen as
traffic policemen for the regulation
of traffic in the vicinity of schools.
These young traffic cops ride bicycles. They are on duty at certain
posts before and after school hours
and their work includes the handling
of school mates in crossing streets
and the reporting of dangerous conditions, as well as accidents. The
juvenile patrol system has been adopted for fourteen schools.
* * *
Although the date has not been set
"for the annual Dunlop bicycle team
handicap road race scores of entries
have been received for the Canadian
classic. The MacDonald Bicycle
Club of Toronto has turned in about
forty entries, while ten members of
the 180th Overseas Battalion have
also signed entry forms. Many young
cyclists are in training for the event,
while a number of old-timers have
decided to turn out once more in order to swell thc number of starters.
The race will be a sixteen-mile affair and will be staged on the Mark-
ham road, one of the main highways
leading out from Toronto. The only
American rider who has won the race
is Hans Ohrt, who captured the time
prize last year. The race has been
an annual fixture for Canada for more
than twenty years. The competition
will be staged on a Saturday during
the present month.
i�� * * *
Says an American cyclist, "I saw
an article in the English paper the
other day criticising our slang as not
being English, sorta slamming the
use of 'pep' as it were. Now that
���would be all right, but dash their-bal
ly lights, they 'blind it' when they
'beat it'; they call a dealer a stockist;
they burn petrol instead of gas; the
talk of top, middle and low instead of
high, intermediate and low; they say
a machine is in top-hole condition
instead of first-class running order.
Well, it's a case of the pot calling the
kettle black, that's all."
* * *
At last there is complete reciprocity
in license recognition between Canada and the United States. One step
bas followed another within the past
year until now the boundary between
the two' North American nations is
less than an imaginary line so far as
international touring cycles arc concerned. The latest move in this game
of privilege granting in which the
governments have, apparently essayed to outdo each other, has been taken
by the United States Department of
Customs. This department, according to the announcement recently
made, has notified its custom officials along the Canadian border, to
extendi, thc non-bonding period for
non-resident tourists from ten to
thirty days.
This means that Canadian riders
can tour in the United States for a
period n'ot extending beyond thirty
days without duty considerations or
restrictions.1, In exchange for this
courtesy, thc Canadian Department of
Customs has already granted American tourists the privilege of staying in
the Dominion for twenty-one days
without regard to duty on machines.
Cyclists of practically all states in
the union are also at liberty to tour
in Ontario as well as other Provinces
for twenty-one days without being
compelled to take out a local license,
the exception being that the riders of
Rhode Island can stay in Ontario for
ten days because of the narrower reciprocity.
It was expected that the American
government would grant a duty free
period of twenty-one days to coincide with the time limit established
by the' Canadian authorities. The
Department at Washington made it
nine days longer. The feeling is that
the Canadian government will "raise
its ante" to meet the privilege granted by Washington. ���_
* * *
The wider adoption of bicycles by
the Canadian Expeditionary Force
for servipe at the front is told in latest advices from overseas. The two-
wheelers have been generally used by
despatch-carriers since the outbreak
of hostilities, but the Canadian Signalling Companies now have-many
motor-cycles and bicycles in their
equipment The Fourth Divisional
Signalling Corps for instance, has the
ROLL OF HONOR
Several thousand officers and matloyesg et tk* Canadian Pacific
Railway Company enlisted for aeUra military doty with Ua Cai ai Ian
Expeditionary Farces, and the majority of tkem are n*w in Europa,
bravely buttling for Canada aud tae Empire.
As particular* of Army Rosen-tots are not available, these Hsta of
those who har* given up their Urea for their country or been wounded
In action ara necessarily Incomplete, and do not therefore Indicate fully
tbe extent to which the Company's officers and employee* have participated In tbe great struggle.
IN  COMPANY'S  SERVICE
NAME
NATURE  OF
CASUALTV
As
Baggage Portar
Car Repairer
Bear, Calvin
Stanley
Cu-den, Cecil C.      Apprentice
Clandlllon,   Wm.     Clerk
Paul
Dai-gavel,   Peter      Wiper
Davidson,   Clifford   H.
Delemont.  Leon
ard
Frlzzelle, Robt.  K. Operator
Gilchrist, Charles    N'ght  Cleaner
Hansen. Amund
Charles
Hume, Henry T.
Johnson, Harry
MaeAskill,  Percy    Trainman
M.
Malcolm, Sydney
Parslsson, Harry
Piton, Harold H.
Porter,  Percy  Ray Clem
Reynolds, Ernsst    Freight Porter
At
Medicine  Hat Wounded
Angus
Calgary
Wounded
Wounded
Fort William  'Wounded
Car  Heater and   St.  John,  N.B. Killed In action
Iceman
WInnlpog
Clerk
Trainman
P'te Car Porter
Wiper
Storeman
Brakcman
Lake Louise
Winnipeg
Calgary
Wounded
Killed In action
Suffering from shock
Wounded
Brit. Col.  Dlv. Killed In action
North Hay
Cranbrook
Macleod
Angus
Lethbrldge
Ouclph
Wounded
Suffering from shock
Wounded  (2nd time)
Killed in action
Woundoil
Killed in action
Carleton Place Suffering from shock
Salway,  Howard
H. R.
Sharp, Ernest J.
Shutelt, Clyde R.
Sinclair, John C.
Smith, Gilbert F.
Snilth, Henry E.
Smith, Leslie C.
Sectlonman
Inspector
Loco.  Fireman
Material Man
Loco. Fireman
Clerk
Transitinan
Neelby
Wounded
Calgary Wounded
Farnham Wounded
West Toronto Killed in ac
North  Bay Wounded
Vancouver
Nelson
Tate, Robert Wm. Machinist
Vldal, Cyril Clerk
Voyce, James W.    Hostler
Walsh, George V.  Stenographer
Walsh,  Mathew      Checker
Williams, Henry J. Fitter's Helper
Woodworth, Fred*. Electr'n's helper Calgary
Young, Norris Pumpman Moose Jaw
Wounded
Previously reported
missing, now officially declared dead.
Wounded
Wounded
Killed In action
Wounded
Wounded
West Toronto Killed In action'
Killed In action.
Suffering from shock
Ogden
North Bay
Lambton
Montreal
Winnipeg
The following casualty to a member of our European Staff on active
service, has been reported:
Roberts. Preston T. Clerk London, Eng.   Wounded
Montreal, September 6th, 1916. (List No. 9)
following: 17 motor-cycles, 40 bicycles, 104 horses and 8 cable wagons,
as well as the usual supplies of telephone apparatus and other signalling
devices. The motorcycle and bicycles are used for the establishment of
lines of signalling stations and for
the inspection and repair of communication wires under shell and
rifle fire. The work sounds interesting.
* * *
The advent of Roumania into the
war will indirectly have a far-reaching result upon the petrol question,
the fuel resources of Roumania are
immense, and, as such, they have been
fully taken advantage of by the Central Powers. Germany and Austria
had constantly imported enormous
quantities of fuel from Roumania, and
indeed, this importation had been going on till almost a week or so of
Roumania joining the Allies. Not only, of course, is this supply automatically stopped, but the supply will
be severely curtailed, if not altogether prohibited, after peace has been
declared.   It is reasonable to suggest
CITIZENS,  ATTENTION!
Know all ye by these presents:
That for Factums and Briefs, no printers give
you better satisfaction than ��It? &tat1flarfl.
That for Letterheads and Envelopes QUjt
;��tattuaro is the place to buy.
That for Book Binding, Engraving, Ruling,
sooner or later you will come to
PRINTING DEPARTMENT
PHONE SEYMOUR 470 FOR PRICES
ON ANY JOB PRINTING ARISING IN
  YOUR  OFFICE  ���	
that after the war we shall have larger quantities of benzole and other
British fuels to draw upon, but at the
same time there is very good reason
to suggest that there will be a large
market for petrol. It is not likely
in view of the extortions of the fuel
combines that the British motorist
and motor cyclist will be content to
purchase their fuel from those people who made capital out of their
necessity, and!, therefore, thc importation of petrol from Roumania will be
very great. Roumanian oil fields have
not yet been fully developed, and as
thc oil fields of Galicia will in all probability remain in our hands, it really
seems as though the American fuel
combines will meet with a just retribution. The present situation also
may be considerably relieved by the
possibilities of Roumania being shortly in a position to supply our Egyptian, Salonika, and other forces with
the vast quantities of fuel which they
require. Admitting this fact, wc may
very fairly expect that in the near
future the present petrol restrictions
will not only be eased, but practically
become  non-existent.
Fun and Frolic
Discoverer's Reward
Long had he worshipped her at a
distance, but bis shyness prevented
him from proposing.
Then, one evening, for the sweet
sake of charity, a theatrical performance took place, in which the charmer was leading lady and more adorable than ever. Afterwards the shy
admirer drew near, bis love made valiant by the sight of her beauty.
"You are thc star of the evening,"
he said as they stood alone in a corner.
"You arc thc first one to, tell mc
so," said tbe damsel, with a happy
blush.
"Then," he retorted promptly, "may
I claim my reward as an astronomer?"
The lady looked puzzled.
"What reward?" she asked.
"Why, the right to give my name
to the star I have discovered!" said
the young man, speaking boldly at
last, and successfully.
A Bawbee Problem
Sandy was walking along the road
in deep thought, and it was his minister who brought him . to earth
again with���"Halloa, Sandy! Thinking of the future, eh?"
"No," replied Sandy, moodily, "Tomorrow's the wifeV birthday, and
A'm thinking o' the present."
* * *
She: You promised to buy me a
sealskin jacket. '
He: Yes, my dear, I did, but I
have had such a bad day in the market that I could not afford to buy
you even an incandescent mantle.
* * *
A d He Sailed Right  On
""Would ye do something for a
poor old sailor?" inquired the seedy
wander-r at the gate.
"Poor old sailor?" said the ladj
at work over the washtub.
"Yes-sum; I followed the water
for sixteen years."
"Well," said the worker as she
resumed her labors, "you certainly
don't look as if you ever caught up
with  it."
* * *
Too Prosaic
"Your wife used to take considerable interest in your gardening efforts."
"Yep."
"But I don't -sec her In the garden
with  you any more."
"She lost interest when she found
I couldn't  raise  olives,  or grapefruit,
or orchids."
* * *
Superfluous Solicitude
"Willie,  I  don't want you to go to
that river resort with the rest of thc
boys."
"Why nol. ma?"
"I'm  Bkeered you'll git hurt  going
up on one of them there parachutes."
* * *
Forest Conservation
And," continued the lecturer "I
warrant you that there is not a man
in this entire audience who has ever
lifted his finger or in any way attempted to stop this awful waste of
our forests and our lumber supply. If
there is I want that man to stand
up."
There was a slight commotion in
the rear of the room, and a nervous
little man rose to thc occasion���and
his feet.
And now, my friend, will you explain in just what way you have conserved  the  forests  of  our nations?"
And, with tne utmost gravity and
sincerity, thc little man said, "I have
used the same toothpick twice."
* * *
Misplaced Cheers
During service in a little country
church tliree ladies were obliged to
take shelter there from a heavy
shower.
Thc officiating minister, knowing
who they were, and wishing to be respectful to them, stooped down to the
clerk who was on his knees, and
whispered: "Three chairs for the
ladies."
The man, who was rattier djeaf,
stood up and shouted, "Three cheers
for   the  ladies,"   which  were    given
with a will.
* * *
Made a Difference
Teacher: "Now, children, here's an
example in mental arithmetic. How
old would a person be who was born
in 1888?"
Pupil: "Was it a man or a woman?"
* * *
Going to it, Gently     v
"Can you bear it if I tell you something serious?" ventured the young
husband.
"Yes; don't keep anything from
mc," gasped the bride.
"Remember this docs not mean that
my love for you is growing less."
"Don't break my  heart.    What is
it?"
"Well  my  dear,  I'm  getting  tired
of angel food every day for dinner.
Would it bc too much to ask you to
have liver and onions?"
* * *
Following Good Advice
"I told you last Sabbath, children,"
said thc Sunday school teacher, "that
you should try to make some one
happy during the week. How many
of you have?"
"I did," answered thc boy promptly-
"That's  nice,  Johnny.      What  did
you do?"
"I went to sec my aunt, and she's
always happy when I go home again."
* * *
Nigger Honesty
It is well known that matrimonial
fidelity is not exactly thc most prominent virtue of the American negro.
A colored pastor was one Sabbath inveighing against the pronencss of his
flock to incontinence, and warming to
his work, came to personalities. "Ah
see befo' me," thundered thc good
preacher, "no less dan nineteen notorious breakers ob de Scbenth Commandment, includin' 'Gene Johnson."
During the week the accused Johnson
remonstrated with his pastor on the
cruelty of thus singling him out, and
the preacher, seeing the force of
'Gene's arguments, promised to make
the amende.
Bredren and sitem," said the good
old man from the pulpit on the following Sunday, "las' Sabbath Ah was
done carried away by' my feelin's, an'
Ah done said mo' dan Ah meant, Ah
should hab said dat Ah saw befo' me
no less dan eighteen notorious breakers of de Sebenth Commandment���
not includin' 'Gene Johnson."
Phone Seymour 9086
WE  INVITE   YOUR
FIRE
INSURANCE
BUSINESS
We W'rite Insurance in Sound,
Reliable Companies
DOW FRASER
TRl/ST CO.
122    HASTIN OS   ST.   WEST
McKay Stati "in, Burnaby
FERNRIDGE  FAII*'. AND  ITS
LESSONS
By Peter Picki'P
They can grow potatoe *> at Pern-
ridge, like wiscpumpkins, a.Vo carrots
���tliere they can grow an*, thing including sturdy boys and bux.-jin, red-
cheeked girls, but, tell it not ill Goth,
and do not proclaim it in tbe streets
of Ascalon, there does not se-em to
be a superabundance of gold���or even
silver in this part of the fertile l?rascr
valley. Not that at the Fern-ridge
Fair, held on Saturday, there was not
abundance. The dinner table was
spread for a meal which would hare
surfeited Gargantun, the tea table literally groaned under its abundance
���but with a population so thrifty, so
industrious, with soil that will, with
hard labor, cheerfully given, produce
"the kindly fruits of the earth" iu
such abundance and of such quality
there should be financial comfort,
people willing to work should be im
"Easy Street," there should be fair-
remuneration for skilful, willing and'
hard toil���and there is not!
Fernridge grows fruit but cannot
sell it at the profit that ought to
come. Why? Ah! there's the rub.
I am not a political economist, I only
know that the same genius which has
tackled problems of transportation
for army units, the same energy which
has organized, clothed, equipped, fed,
drilled and made an "army" should
have been at work long ago for the
farmer, the tiller of thc soil, the
craftsman. Only WAR seems to put
life into our legislators��� only the
WAR drum makes them open their
eyes to what is necessary to be done.
Long before WAR there were questions of road making, water supply,
electric light and power supply, high
railway freights, loans to farmers,
etc., etc., crying loudly for attention
but���only a deaf ear was turned.
Longfellow says:
'"Were half the power that fills the
world with terror,
Were half the  wealth  that's spent
on camps and courts
Given  to   redftm   the  human    mind
from error,
There  were  no  need  for  arsenals
and forts."
Had there been a real patriotic,
statesmanlike treatment of the people of the Fraser valley, the boys,
when called on, would have gone a-
way with light hearts, knowing'those
left behind were in a land of plenty
where wealth���not a bare living ���
would be the reward of toil.
Hut, without the encouragement,
the help that they should have had,
without even thc organization tliat
they might, with wisdom, have got
for themselves, the people of Fernridge had a Wonderful Fair.
Judge llowcy went from Westminster to look at it. People went from
Vancouver���ALL were surprised, delighted, charmed at the fruit, vegetables, needlework.
Wonderful people those of Fernridge. Wonderful place! Will the
new cabinet, the new legislators take
this little corner as a type of thousands of places, where real legislative
geniuc can make a population smile
���where the earth will yield ��� pot
profits for speculators���but an honest, comfortable, clean, wholesome,
human living for the thrifty, honest
worker?
Fernridge made ine furiously to
think. Why is there not talk here of
prosperity instead of tales of woe
about food grown���and no remunerative market, and that while thc cost
of living goes up���like a Zep.
WANTED ��� PUBLIC SCHOOL
graduates or high school students to
take shorthand or business courses
and pay for same from salary earned
after graduation. Only a limited
number accepted on this plan. Apply
at once in own handwriting to
Success Business College, Vancouver, B. C.
The offender was brought into the
orderly room.
"To send a    live bomb like that as
a  'souvenir'  is  the  d dest,  silliest
thing I ever heard of." commented
the officer.
"But it waas to.my mother-in-law,"
ventured  the- prisoner. SATURDAY,    OCTOBER    7,    1916
THE  STANDARD
SEVEN
Northern Securities Limited
Established 1906
529 PENDER STREET WEST
FINANCIAL AGENTS.
Seymour 1574
ESTATE MANAGERS
NOTARY PUBLIC
HOUSES WANTED
We have numerous inquiries for six and eight-roomed houses in
good districts.    List your house for rent with our rental department.
B. GEO. HANSULD
Manager
REFLECTIONS ��� MISCHA
ELMAN  RECITAL
By Laura Rees Thomas
After spending an evening spell-
hound by the wondrous music which
the seemingly inspired musician, Mis-
cha Elman drew from his violin on
Monday night, how can one help but
reflect on tlie influence of the best
in art, and at thc same time acknowledge its apparent appreciation iu
Vancouver. The hall was filled to
capacity, but one could have almost
heard a pin drop, as the music told its
tale, through thc medium of the violin, for that is what real music does,
it bears a distinct message to each
individual listener, and one had only
to look around on Monday evening
and watch the different expressions
and emotional effects on the various
faces to verify the fact.
We all know that clever picture
called "A Beethoven ��� Sonata," tbe
scene laid in an artist's studio in tbe
Quartier Latin, Paris, where the old
man at the piano is playing with inspired air one of thc great master's
works, while the listening faces of
students and models display a whole
gamut of varying emotions.
Although Mischa Elman's technique and execution are more than wonderful, it is surely his fine, clear interpretations and beautiful rythmical
treatment of the phrasing that go far
to make him one of the world's greatest violinists.
The hearing of such music helps us
to appreciate thc beautiful in life, and
widens the whole perspective of our
outlook, and lifts us at least for the
time being, out of this work-a-day
world.
An audience, as we well know,
holds many types ��� those who go
merely to see and be seen, others because their friends are all going, and
it is quite the thing to do. There is
thc musician who goes to criticise,
and thc aspirant who goes to learn;
again there are those happy few who
willingly go without the next meal
in order to pay their fifty cents for
two hours of pure enchantment, and
the great number who know nothing
of the technical difficulties in the
playing of the instrument to which
they are listening, but who love music for music's sake, and so on indefinitely���for to every on*: the music makes its appeal in a different
way, and each One answers that appeal a#his individual depths or limitations will permit.
Thc programme presented at Monday's concert was a fine one. the
fourth item made especially interesting because it included a charming
little work called "Nuit de Mai," composed by Elman himself, also a characteristic "Country Dance" by Weber,
but transcribed by the performer. He
was the recipient of two beautiful
floral tributes during the evening,
and was generous in the matter of encores, lie was recalled time after
time to bow his acknowledgements
to his enthusiastic admirers.
izations striving to eliminate common fire and accident hazards from
the United States and Canada, are
uniting tbis year in urging the nation-wide observance of fire and accident prevention day on October 9th,
thc anniversary of the great Chicago
fire. An attraative poster lias been
designed and suggested programmes
for observance of the day worked
out, which are being distributed to
the civic and commercial organizations of the country. The national
and dominion associations of fire
chiefs, fire marshals and credit men
are co-operating. While sporadic observances of fire prevention day have
heretofore been held in certain states
and cities, this is the first organized
attempt to promote its general observance  throughout  North  America.
FIRE AND ACCIDENT PREVENTION  DAY���OCT.  9
The National Fire Protection Association and the National Safety
Council, the leading American organ-
The general meeting of the Provincial Chapter, l.O.D.E. in British
Columbia will be held in Vancouver
on Tuesday, October 10, at 10.30 a.m..
PREPARING FOR PEACE [ernment i- a surprise nol only t" the the bonds already in the hands of the
1. Looking inf. the future, what I Ministers, but to bankers and broker-' public, but rather the policy is I al
problems confront us���what demands a�� well. It will be remembered thatjlow ther last issue to retain somi ele
for  readjustment  of  lancl  and  labor, |in   1915  the  Government put out  its |ment of strength which thc preceding
issue did not have.
It appears to take a gnat  deal
publicity to gi i  thi   Canadian  ; ���
iasl       over   anything.     They
after thi- War Loan much more
readily  than  they  did  the   first  and
tless, now they are forming the
habit - f putting -hall Bums into these
excellent  securities,  ihey   will,   without  the  aid  of  banks    r    insurance
-.   -i-l -ri' c-  fifty  or a  luui-
for   expansion   of     production     and j first $50,000,000 War Loan.   This was
trade? taken up ��o readily that ihc- issue was
2. Are we to anticipate a flood of enlarged to $100,000,000. The
immigrants seeking homes in the last of the first loan, however, --.
great West, or will that westward augurj that the second one would bi
flow be checked by the need of re-1similarly received, and that there ������-a-
building devastated Europe, by c-mi- some trepidation about making the
gration restrictions and by the sheer 'amount as large as on,, hundred mil-
scarcity of men resulting from losses lion dollar-, seems apparent from the
in war? fact that the chartered bank- got un
3. Are we to face a period of dim- der ihc- loan by subscribing one-half
hushed purchasing power combined of thc entire amount, before the- i m dollars i,�� i year.
with higher cost of production owing sue was put before tlu- public. It i-j Subscriptions to tlie loan from Van-
to dearer raw materials, higher taxes a natural inference that the Finance couver were $2,645,500, as against $1,-
and higher wages? If such condi-1 Department expected the Canadian 820,000 for the first war loan issued
tions develop how long will they pre- public to take- the other fifty million I last November, These figures, show-
vail?   How can they best be relieved?[dollars, and it was emphasized in 'in- ing as ihey do an increase of $625,500
These questions are asked in eir- offer closed that thc Canadian public:in applications from this city, are con-
culars issued by the department of j was depended upon to forward its j elusive evidence of crrMtlv imnrnved
trade, Ottawa, in regard to the forth- small applications.    In the 1915 loan financial   conditions
coming  national  business   conference tbe insurance companies,  both  Cana-' -
at   Ottawa'.    At   this   convention   the  dian and  Hritish and foreign compan-
business men of Canada will be asked |ies, took about ten  million  ciollars of
to give their views as to methods of the loan, and il might be naturally lhe Nicola valley potato grower
increasing the country's 'commerce Isupposed that their subscription this are busily engaged digging and some
and industry. It requires, however, year would be less. Instead, each of them expect to commence shipping
some serious thinking and prepara-[company endeavored to increase (he- early next week. During the next
tion on the part of our business men'amount of its application, The most few weeks there will in- a large num-
beforc the meeting of this national Ispectacular insurance subscription (her of cars leave Merritt station, all
commercial convention. What can came from the Sun Life, which asked filled with high-grade Nicola valley
they add to tlie information, the in- for five million dollars of bonds and potatoes. Digging demonstrates-that
terest, the effectiveness of thc com-'afterwards increased this to five mil-jthe yield is good and that the quality
ing gathering? [lion, five hundred thousand. This year'is most excellent.   "Grown in the Ni-
For the six years preceding the war'the  insurance   companies, have   taken'cola Valley  British Columbia.
greatly improve!
in   Vancouver.
PROVINCIAL  ITEMS
Nicola  valley  potato  gr
This prosperity is also reflected in
the good crops produced this year.
The warmers are adopting the slogan,
"Sell nothing from thc farm that can-
| not walk off," and are adding livestock and feeding their hay and grain
rather than selling it.
* * *
The Paradise Mine of the Windermere Mining Division has resumed
' shipping after an idleness extending
Dver ten years. Its first car of ore
left "ii Tuesday the fifth instant, for
the smelter at Trail.
Tbe mine is at present to the great
satisfaction oi the district giving employment to twenty-one nun and arrangements are being completed to
-..-c- this number to thirty men
when steady employment will be given throughout tlie- coming winter.
Suitable shipping facilities are being arranged for on the line of the
Kootenay   Central   Railway.
* * *
Parties returning from thc hills report game in abundance, especially
bear. The small animals are still out
and a long open autumn is predicted.
Thc muskrats are building their houses low and beaver are still building
dams and not housing up, all of which
is taken by the oracles to mean a mild
winter.
TpSS^Y't*-*^-;1""-'"
Packing Establishment of P. Burns & Co. at Vancouver, where an ever increasing quantity of home-grown hogs
and cattle are handled.
Why He Was Sad
""Seemed to sadden old' Geldbox
when his new son-in-law said good-
by after the wedding. Is he so fond
of him?"
"Well, not exactly. You see the
new son-in-law didn't say goodby; he
said 'Au revoir.' "
* * *
Only Two
I'latbush���Are you acquainted with
any medical terms?
Besonhurst���Only two.
Flatbush���What   are   they?
Besonhurst���"Shake well before
using," and "$2 a visit, please."
* * *
��� Up to Him
"Do you believe circumstances alter cases?"
"I  certainly do," said the lawyer.
"Then you've got to dig up a few
circumstances that 1 can use or my
case is lost."
* * *
About the Same
The college yell of a body of Chinese students who arc now visiting the
Pacific coast is:
'"Chili bi. yi, shai, ki.
Chung wung. we cum.
Hip long li!"
Which, being interpreted, means
probably just as much as the average
college yell.
poem.
at the Vancouver Hotel. Many mat- capital was flowing into Canada al
tcrs of interest to the order through- the rate of over $700,000 every workout the Province will be brought up ing day. According to an estimate by
for discussion, among these being thc , Sir George Paish, Canada received
educational wnrk of the Order; and something like $1,500,000,000 from
a resolution from the Provincial Ex- Britain alone between 1907 anel 191.1
ecutive that a memorial plot-be csta-l1'1 tl,e same Period tne aggregate of
blishecl
tal City
in
the cemetery of the Capi-
I imports
^^_ OOI'.IHKI.KIU
for  llie  future  interment  of | ,
IJM iperity   lias
such soldiers who fought in the- great handed to
war of 1914. and wherein might be
placed a column bearing the name of
every soldier from llritish Columbia
vflio fell on the Field of Honor. Thc
maintenance of this spot would be
thc peculiar and proud charge of the
Daughters of the Empire. The Provincial   Executive  commends   the   re-
exports   exce
celc
1   Sl
e ther words,
our
pro!
sonic   time   |
east
bee
ver
In
 us.
At  present we are, finding on our
doorsteps   every   morning   a   million
dollars in unsought war orders, Yesterday and today our prosperity has
been prepaid. Tomorrow, what will
bc the position?
o\cr sixteen million dollars oi the
loan. The bonds offered the public
by the Dominion ol Canada are so
essentially suitable for the treasury
of an  institution,   that  it  is  not  sur
prising the life and other co
wem alter it. There is only
to the same companies getting
ue
stronger  on   tlic   next   lo:
is  that  they  may   find  it
THE WAR LOAN
Patriotic   pride   was
deeply     am!
the   announce- i
published to the
the Chapters.
���areful  attention  of
in even
i  and  that
 difficult  t-
market at a fair price the blocks of
securities, not nearly as good as War
Loan, which they now own.
Hi many case- companies cliii rill
themselves oi holdings, in order to
prepare  for  the  new   acquisition.  The
chance   to  take   on   these   bonds   is
welcomed by the fiscal heads of insurance and kindred concerns as a
piece of good business. With their
funds in War Loan, the-,* have no
the   trust   funds   com-
Tiie city  of  Port  Mo
.i-si-iii:.  ,   lhe      Port    -
I -.   Limit! cl,   i"   eel
larj i al   scaic
total capital of $160,000
has  guai antei d  the    bi
cable   oi    $100,000.      T
is     ow   making   merchant   bars,   ;
���   : oses   to  install    largei    m
has
f
stee 1
ng
c in   a
ut
of   a
|   >,
lo
Cl  11
j
the
pans
Literary   Language
'"My   dtar,   this   pie   is
Your own work'-"
"The cook collaborated," she admitted with some hesitation.
* * -.-
An Idea
"The boy sure made a fine speech,"
said the old man. "an' I'm prouder
than ever of him, but what was them
languages he wandered off in so fre-
quent?"
"Well, once he slung a little Latin,
an' next he hit her up in Greek."
"That's trooel! They'll lie fine to
-v,car  at  the  mule  in.  when  he   gits
home."
���. i^i
BILLY   SUNDAY
' By John Bump)
later on
furnai es
in   full    -I
alter the tw
which are !
eration,
��� ' ���
in   he
built
port  of  tbe  October  meeting,  when j properly  gratified   by .worries 	
ment a few days ago of the mime-use ; ��� feuy
over-subscription,      amounting        l" t tlle'c-   Wncls���t!,e     strongest   in   the
and the
B. C. MUNICIPAL BONDS
Have proved  tlieir  Safety and  Stability aa   a   Profitable   Investment,
We offer n variety of thoroughly safeguarded bond issues, sold io
net 6 'A per cent, to 7*4 per cent. Consult our Bond Department by
letter or in person.
Canadian Financiers Trust Co.
HEAD  OFFICEl    830 HASTINGS  STREET WEST, VANCOUVER, B.  C.
PATRICK  DONNELLY,  General  Manager.
!third consideration with them is tliat!en
amounting        ���
double  the  required sum, of the new:  ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Canadian  war loan.    Tliere  is a sig-1 world ��� at a bargain  price
nil'icance  to tbis, however,  from an
other and also very  important viewpoint.    With   the   best   will  and   thelvery
deepest  patriotism  in  the    world,    a ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
not'ablc to sell quantities of these bond
l lie improvement of the i ad iron,
John Street, along Allien Stl I
Aliceville, :e distance of about twi
mites, has been finished. I; is , iac
tically a combination of the Dew-due- trunk road towards Vancouver.
It has been macadamized, rolled and
oiled and is considered a boon by
motorists.
Work  on  the  construction   of    the
water equalization tank at the upper
jf  Queen  Street  has  commenc-
when  stable   conditions  replace    the led.     The   tank   has   a   capacity     of
unusual  and    variable    money '.100,000.gallons, and is being built by
narkcts of the  present,  they  will be
nation can not give what it has
got.    This immediate    and   generous
response to the call for the sinews of
war   indicates   a   fundamental
tion   of   prosperity   wl
years of war and more than that
condi-
not    two
of
ui
ha
, passing     financial      depre
I been able to undermine.
The success of this second domestic
issue on the part of the Canadian gov-
"THE MAN WHO KNOWS"
Does not have to seek a position.   A position seeks him.    Business men seek "Success" graduates.    We
cannot supply the demand.    Why not get ready now?    Our Fall Term opens September 5th.
The SUCCESS BUSINESS COLLEGE, Limited
COR. 10TH AVE. AND MAIN ST., VANCOUVER       Schools from Coast to Coast      Phone Fair. 2075
at a profit to the company. The only
gamble on the entire transaction is as
to how many War Loans Ottawa will
issue. If tlie war should proceed for
five or even ten years, and if Canada
should be asked to take care of six.
seven or eight hundred million dollar
loans, the period allowed for the full
digestion of that vast sum would be
materially lengthened out, and the
time for the bonds to take their place
as leaders of the national juarket
would be extended. But it becomes
evident already that Canada is ready
and able to absorb thc larger issues,
and Ottawa is not going to make the
issue of its bonds monotonous. One
may very well count on a departure
for the next season. The Finarvce
Minister will do nothing to  cheapen
the Pacific Coast Pipe Company.
* * *
Merritt hunters who have paid visits to tbe various lakes in this part
of the province during the past two
weeks report varied luck. Some parties have been successful in making
fairly good bags, while others have
secured very little game.
* * *
.Indications that this year finds thc
farmers of tbe Columbia Valley more
prosperous than heretofore are shown
in the heavy freight business that is
now in evidence on the Kootenay
Central line. Every outgoing train
from Golden carries large quantities
of that class of freight that shows
that the pioneer equipment of a few-
years ago is being replaced by modern comforts.
Billy Sunday was here last Tuesday
night.
1 knew hcY, be here as soon as I
became acquainted with the fact that
.i :\. e I i-d dy, the Chamber of Commerce, ami Tom McCusker had decided to have an industrial war in this
burg.
Prize  false  alarm  of the  3)tb  ccn-
Itury.
i ncc of the purple in the realm of
Platitudinaria.
\ c rbal inebriate.
Billy is all these things���and a lot
more.
But mostly���supremely���eternally
���as long as there is a single imitation
of thought in the little biscuit-shaped
vacuum at the north end of his neck
���as long as there is an ounce of poisonous gas left in the efficient little
bellows that serve him for lungs���
Billy Sunday is the arch-enemy of
labor.
Billy doesn't know a great deal, but
he knows how to put the labor movement on thc bum.
An bow to get the money for doing
it.
Of course, Bill is vulgar, but he
could be forgiven that if he were not
so vicious.
He is profane, but not in the conventional way.
WANTED ��� PUBLIC SCHOOL
graduates or high school students to
take shorthand or business courses
and pay for same from salary earned
after graduation. Only a limited
number accepted on this plan. Apply
at once in own handwriting to
Success Business College, Vancouver, B. C. EIGHT
Wit &twtiwto
SATURDAY,    OCTOBER   7,    1916
WM. DICK LIMITED
New Overcoats
If you are in need of an overcoat it will pay you to inspect our
stock. Our range comprises Chesterfields, Meltons, Balmacaans
and the well-known Aquatic Brand English Showerproof Coats,
which are warmer and more dressy than the rubber coat.
Overcoats of Quality, fitted and finished to your measure by our
own tailors.
$15  $18  $20  $25  $30  $35
I
"Your Money's Worth or Your Money Back"
WM. DICK, Ltd.
33_47_49 HASTINGS ST. E., VANCOUVER
"Two Big Stores for Men"
The Spitfire of the Navy
The Part the Destroyer is Playing in Modern Warfare
Thanksgiving Day
Take the B. C. Electric Fraser Valley line to Chilliwack or to the fishing or shooting places.
SPECIAL RATES, FARE AND THIRD
Tickets on sale Saturday to ��� Monday, good for return until Tuesday.
Fishermen  note  changes of timetable     effective    October
Chilliwack  trains  leave  Carrall  Street at 8.30 a.m.,  12.50
5.10 p.m.   Jardine service remains as at present.
p.m.  and
Carrall and Hastings
Phone Seymour 5000
UNION STEAMSHIP CO. of B.C. Limited
TUB   BRITISH   COLUMBIA   COAST   HAS   BEEN   DESCRIBED
AS THE EIGHTH WONDER OF THE WORLD
A VOYAGE
"North by West in the Sunlight"
IN ONE OF OUR
Eight Vessels "8" in Regular Service
WILL HELP YOU TO REALISE THIS TRUTH
Apply to our Publicity Department tor brochures "Outward Bound"
and "North by West In the Sunlight," and particulars on Special Fares,
Hotel Accommodation and Tariffs, etc.
Head Office, and Wharfi UNION DOOK, FOOT OF CARRALL STREET
Take Car to Columbia Avenue Phone Seymour 806
Sou-Van
TABLE
CREAM
RICH AND DELICIOUS
10c
PER HALF PINT
First Landlady: I manage to keep
my boarders longer than you do. Second Landlady: Oh, I don't know. You
keep them so thin that they
longer than they really are.
look
PHONE
FAIRMONT
2624
WANTED ��� PUBLIC SCHOOL
graduates or high school students to
take shorthand or business courses
and pay for same from salary earned
-ffter graduation. Only a limited
number accepted on this plan. Apply
at once in own handwriting to
Success Business College, Vancouver, B. C.
Sou-Van Milk-
South Vancouver
Milk Company
Scientific Dairymen
29TH AVE. AND FRASER
Phone Fairmont 2624
Cycling Dan says:
That by buying a Bicycle
You stop "bye-bye"
To> many "a nickle"
Spent for cars
Or jitney fare.
Besides you can
Ride anywhere,
Pedal a Paragon���
And be glad
That you acted
On this "Ad."
Cycling can be made to pay
See Fred Deeley���now���Today.
FRED DEELEY
(The Cycle Man)
1126   GRANVILLE   STREET
VANCOUVER
"Before the war," writes a naval
correspondent in "The London Magazine," "a halo of romance had been
woven by story writers around the
destroyer. The name which explains
its original purpose ��� torpedo-boat
destroyer���had in its new form another and more sinister meaning. Thc
destroyer was nu longer regarded as
thc protector of the battleship, but as
its assailant." The following extracts from the article give some interesting details of the accomplishments of this "maid-of-all-work" in
the modern fleet:
The importance of the work which
has been performed by the destroyer
in the war is only equalled by its variety. A glance at some of its activities reveals how intimately connected are these with many of the most
exciting and dramatic episodes of the
sea war. Sometimes the destroyer
flotillas have been heard of as watchdogs em the edges of the enemy's
minefields, observing his outposts and
searching his water-lanes. When, too,
the bark of their glins has been heard,
they have shown that they are also
capable of a deadly bite.
In the skirmishes with enemy
scouts off the islands which fringe
the Heligoland Triangle, the destroyers have always played a prominent
pari% Then, also, when the great
fleet has set out from its net-protected harbors to sweep through the seas,
it has been the destroyers which have
provided its escort, and as its avant
couriers have kept vigilant guard a-
gainst lurking submarines, bringing
thc big ships back in safety to their
sheltered bases.
The 'destroyers, too, have acted as
the satellites of the big battle-cruisers, and when one of these have been
wounded in action, have provided a
screen tinder cover of which the
stricken mastadon has limped1 back
safely into port.
In the heat of the melee there has
been seen in the action of the destroyer crews the consummation of their
long and arduous tactical training:
while in the saving of life after misadventure, they have exhibited all
those qualities of humanity, coolness,
and daring which throughout our long
sea history have ever been characteristic traits of the British seaman.
Nor is it only in the North Sea that
the destroyer has carried out its
task, however arduous and perilous
this may have been. It is the destroyer that has proved the most effective instrument for defence against
the underwater boats. From the time
of the passing of the Expeditionary
Force to France, multitudes of transports, crammed with soldiers, have
owed their safe transit through submarine-infested seas to their destroyer escort.
In every kind of weather, off Anzac
and Helles, as well as in the waters
which wash our island shores, in winter and summer, with sea-swept decks
and under conditions of discomfort
which might have dismayed all but
thc toughest heart, the destroyer flotillas have labored incessantly as despatch carriers on reconnaissance duty and have even, at a pinch, taken
their turn at mine-sweeping. It is
as much due to the heroic exertions of
the dfestroycr crews, the skill and
enterprise of their officers, and thc
handiness, seaworthiness, and speed
and power of the boats themselves,
as to thc shield provided by thc heavier ships under Sir John Jellicoe's
command, that the inviolability of the
shores of Great Britain and of the
Empire has been maintained.
It was confidently expected that
most of tbe excitement of tile war
at sea would revolve round thc deeds
of the toyedo craft, of which destroyers were the most numerous. This
has been the case, although not pre
cisely in the manner expected, owing to the inactivity of the German
fleet. Few have been the opportunities for delivering that swift and un
expected attack in which, through the
risks are tremendous, the triumph
compensates for everything.
Robbed of the chances of fulfilling
long-cherished hopes, Jhowever, th'e
destroyer commanders have done
wonders in demonstrating the all-
round capabilities of their boats. The
torpedo being temporarily eclipsed,
they have made excellent use of their
other weapon, the gun, so that it
would be more correct to say that in
such fighting as they have been engaged in they have served less as torpedo carriers than as gunboats.
We owe the "L" class of destroyers, thc achievements of which have
been so conspicuous, to Mr. Churchill's predilection for an alphabetical
system of nomenclature. In 1913, he
re-classified all the .destroyers of the
Navy on this basis, making ten dis-
tered from "A" to "K," although K
save confusion the earlier boats retained their names. To tbe destroyer*,
under construction, however, there
were allotted new designations with
the initial letter "L," and these vessels, begun in 1912, had nearly all
been passed into service by the time
war came upon us.
The crews in the "L" boats must
be justly proud of their record iu the
war. They began it at the sinking of
the "Konigin Luise," but this was
quite a small affair compared with
their achievements in the Heligoland
Bight action' on August 28th, 1914.
The entire flotilla, except for tlie
"Loyal," got a look in at this successful scooping operation, and several of the boats have stirring episodes to their credit.
In the thick of thc fighting which
developed after the first advance in
thc early morning, the "Laurel" and
"Liberty," forming part of the division to which was entrusted the innermost and most dangerous berth
when the flotilla approached the German coast, made a great name by the
manner in which they acquitted themselves. Commander F. F. Rose, in
the "Laurel,," was wounded in the
left leg by the third shell which
struck the vessel, but he continued to
issue orders as if nothing had happened, and a little later he received
another wound in the right leg. Although urged to go below, he remained on the bridge until six o'clock in
the evening, displaying great heroism
and devotion to duty.
It was on the bridges and around
thc guns of the destroyers that most
of the casualties occurred, and the
conduct of the seamen in these exposed positions was superb. On the
bridge of the "Liberty," everybody
except one was killed by the heavy
fire from the German cruisers and
small craft.
The loss of the German cruiser,
"Mainz," one of the crack gunnery
ships in the enemy's navy, and on
board which Lieutenant von Tirpitz,
the Grand Admiral's son, was serv
ing, was no doubt partly brought
about by the attacks of the British
destroyers. She had come out quickly to the aid of the German torpedo
craft when the latter had been attacked, and, firing with great accuracy, was able to inflict considerable
damage with her numerous 4-in. guns
upon the unprotected boats of the
flotilla,. The VLydjiard," however,
claimed to have hit her with a torpedo.
In two other notable engagements,
the "L" class particularly distinguished themselves���on October 17th, 1914,
when a German destroyer division
was sunk off the Dutch coast; and
again on May 1st, 1915, when another division of the class accounted
for the two torpedo boats which had
been the assailants of the small armed trawler Columbia earlier in the
day.
The "Loyal," Lieutenant-Commander F. Burgess Watson, took perhaps
the leading part in thc October.affair. She "got" the first of the enemy's boats by carrying away her forward funnel with the first shot and
the vheel with thc third, and the
German vessel swinging round, received mortal injuries by a succession
of accurate shells amidships. The
British destroyer did not come out
entirely scathless, as at one point
when she was rather close to the Germans, one of their shells entered her
stern about four feet above the water-line, making only a small hole.
An amusing incident in thc "Loyal"
during this fight was the antics of
her pet monkey Jacko, who had no
relish for German shells, and, becoming terrified, bolted in the cook's galley. On a topmost shelf he found a
fish kettle, into which he squeezed
himself until the action was over.
Poor Jacko was lost a few weeks later during a spell of bad weather.
He came on deck for a breath of fresh
air, was caught by a wave, and washed overboard.
In the May Day action, the four
British destroyers appear to have
been lead by the "Laforey," so named
in honor of a distinguished admiral
who was a contemporary of Nelson.
The boats laid down in 1913 are
known as the "M" class. They did
not come into prominent notice until
the engagement of thc battle-cruisers
of the Dogger Bank on January 24th,
1915. In that action, when the enemy's destroyers were threatening attack, the "Meteor" and "W division,
and Sir David Beatty, "passed ahead
of us. Captain the Hon. H. Meade,
D.S.O., handling this division with
conspicuous ability."    Why the des-
assisted the Lion, were explained by
an officer in one of them, who wrote:
"It was nearly entirely a big ship
action and the destroyers hardly got
a chance, as the German destroyers
sneaked off out of it directly they
caught sight of us. . . . At 11.10 we
came up to the Lion, who had fallen
out of the line, and was listing, a good
deal to port. . . . The First Flotilla
boats formed a screen round the
Lion, and after this we were out of
the fighting altogether. No one tried
attack us, as 1 fancy after Heligoland they are a bit chary of our destroyers."
The "M" class are still bigger boats
than the "L's," with a displacement of
1,000 tons, their oil-fuel driven engines giving them a speed of 33 knots.
Altogether, they are splendid ships
of their type, in the design of which
every consideration has been sacrificed to obtain pace and power, with
d)ue regard to seaworthiness. The
speed) and Weight of such a boat
should carry her through the skin
of any submarine.    0
In all the destroyers, economy of
space below deck is a primary con-'
side-ration. Lifcjn such vessels must
ihe a constant strain, which falls most
heavily on thc commander, His opportunities for thc display of daring
and enterprise may be limited, but
there are other qualities which he is
called upon to exercise at all times.
The handling of this craft demands
skill and seamanship and sound judgment.
A destroyer on patrol can take nothing for granted. The wily foe is
up to all kinds of dodges, and must
be dealt with in kind. During the
day, thc men are ever at the loaded
guns, keen-eyed watchers are on the
look-out for periscopes, everyone is
on the alert, every preparation made
for instant action.
After sundown, and in misty weather ��� and mist is the rule in the
North Sea���the chances of a surprise
are increased, and vigilance must be
redoubled. In daylight or dark, for
hours together, the officers on the
bridge peer through the hazy atmosphere over the grey watery waste
amid which the ship is tearing her
way. At any moment, a darker patch
may prove to be a floating mine, a
brighter streak of foam herald the
appearance of a submarine, or a
smudge upon the horizon, where sea
and sky merge in a reddish streak,
turn out to be the smoke of an enemy
ship.
it, are trying to do this. If any one
can help them, either with practical
suggestions or offers of steady work,
it is his duty to do so.
No two leaves on a tree have precisely the same shape, and no two
men arc exactly alike. Each man's
capacities have to be carefully studied, to avoid putting round pegs intei
square holes.
On the care wc take now depends
thc answer to the question whether
our returning soldiers are to be a
burden or a help to themselves and
their fellow-citizens.
Mere quacks and theoretical cure-
alls are mischievous enough at anytime, and especially at times of great
emergency like ours.
This is no carpenter's job���and nol
even a watchmaker's.
THE BORE
One of a Series of Amusing Papers
Read at a Vancouver Club
,���������':
PUTTING SOLDIERS INTO
REPAIR
Not a Carpenter's Job���It is More
Like  a  Watchmaker's
In a Western town, about twenty
years ago���writes a correspondent���
my watch stopped. Neither winding
nor shaking would make it go on a-
gain.
Seeing "watchmaker and jeweller"
over a store I went in.
The man opened my watch, turned
his head first on one side and then
on the other and said he thought he
could put it all right. When I got
it back, it went for half an hour, then
stopped again.
He had done it more harm than
good. It cost twice as much to repair in thc end as if he had never
touched it.
That man, I found, was a carpenter
by trade. He had done his best���but
a carpenter's "best" for a disabled
watch is not quite so curative as his
best for a rickety chair.
It was not a carpenter's job.
When a soldier comes home "out of
repair," we have got to remember
that a man is a more delicate and
complicated piece of mechanism than
even a watch. Also he is infinitely-
more valuable to his country than
the most marvellous chronometer ever invented.
The country naturally insists that
the most skilful surgeons and physicians shall be employed to heal the
soldier's physical ills.
But that is only the first stage of
the disabled soldier's treatment.
Equal skill and thoroughness must
be employed to equip him educationally ��� with technical knowledge
and practice for regaining the ranks
of industry.
Even then we cannot turn him a-
drift. We must exert continued and
systematic care to see that he gets
work suited to him, or trouble is
sure to follow,
The Military Hospitals Commission of the Dominion Government,
and the Provincial Commissions and
local committees in co-operation with
It is a part of the comedy of life
tliat we are so quick to find the faults
and foibles of our friends and so sloe-,
to acknowledge or even to recognize
our own. I-'or the purpose of this
symposium, however, I must assume
for the nonce that I am free from
thc quality I condemn and that I hold
in nice equipoise all thc virtues which
justify the critic. '
1 define the Bore as one who has
the temerity to differ from me on any
subject whatever, and naturally I object to anyone else using the same
formula unless (Q. E. D.) he can
show that like myself, he has the oracular gift. Thc Bore is versatile:
he either can do a thing and wont, or
cannot do a thing and will. In the
one case politeness requires me to
invite him to do his best; in the other
if he does his best, then impatience
impels mc to urge him to do his
worst. He can also perforin the juggling feat of raising infraction of
manners to the pseudo dignity of ;,
virtue. I introduce three: Brown.
Jones and Robinson.
(1) I am in conversation and am
coming to thc climax when Brown
interrupts with an incident in bis own
experience. Alarmed at this invasion
of a choice preserve I raise my voice,
to be met by a still louder tune. I
continue, however, the jangling bid
for a hearing in the hope that his
elephantine sensibility will at length
be pierced and enable me to get at
least the remnants, ere the psychological moment has passed for ever
Exit Brown with virtuous indignation.
(2) I am forced to listen to a gushing stream of inanities from Jones
and I wish to get away to lunch. In
vain I east furtive glances at my
watch; but at length 1 see ahead the
end of a paragraph requiring a pause.
At the correct moment I make a
quick move, but Jones bas already
button-holed me and pegged off a
fresh claim on my patience by a commanding "but" or an "and." The frequent result is: Pistols for two, and
coffee for one, which I drink in due
course.
(3) I am telling some greaf news
and Robinson often breaks in with
greater experiences by distant relatives. This variety of the genus
should have lived in thc time of old
Archimedes; for the philosopher
would then have found the man
whose second cousin bad in his back
parlor the fulcrum that would have
moved the world.
I would like to develop the thesis
that frequently Boredom is rooteil
in pride, which has the bad pre-eminence that it occasioned the devil's
fall: but if I exceed my time I will
certainly be B Bore, so I stop at
once���-but with this final shot, however, that the only bore we can possibly tolerate in this time of war is
the bore of a gun.
-W. R. DUNLOP.
Visitor (at penitentiary"): But whatever induced you to take up safecracking for a living?
Prisoner: Oh, I dunno, lady. I
guess I had a natural gift for it,
* * *
Mrs. Jiggs: So your daughter married a surgeon?
Mrs. Noggess: Yes, I'm so glad.
At last I can afford to have appendicitis.
* * *
We admit that we are superstitious, but not to the extent of prefixing twelve dollars to thirteen.
_^^^^_^^^^^_^^^^^^^^__, troyers did not do more in  this ac-
tinct groups, according to type, let-1 tion, and the manner in which they
-[RUN*
RAIL TICKETS TO ALL POINTS
General Agency Transatlantic Steamship Linea
B. Jenney, O. A. P. D.
Phone:  Sey. (134
W. O. Connolly, C. P. p. A.
32�� Grinville Street

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