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The Islander Mar 14, 1914

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Array JeginUtlon
libHjTS
THE ISLANDER
Largest Circulation irt the Comox District.
tf
L        VOL IV., No.
THE ISLANDER. CUMBERLAND. B.C., SATURDAY. MAR. 14.1914
Subscription price, $1.50 per year
ROYAL BANK
Branch of Bank at Abbotsford
Held Up by Masked Men
and $2,000 Stolen.
^Vancouver, March 10.—Five
heavily armed foreigners, said to
be Italians held up the Abbots-
ford branch of the Royal Bank
at 10.26 this morning and while
two of them stood at the doorway
firing their guns in the air, the
other forced Teller J. B. Johnston
to hand out bills and coin to the
amount of $1000 to $2000, The
hold-up men then made their escape, the onlookers on the streets
of Abbotsford being so startled
by the discharge of the revolvers
that no one attempted to stop the
thugs and they made a clean get
way.  -	
An early report had it that the
teller was killed by the bandits
and that they got away with $3000
..but Supervisor H. K. Wright who
received an official report here
this morning from Manger S. A.
Morley, of the Abbotsford branch
and who also talked with Teller
Johnston over the long distance
telephone stated that the loss
would not exceed $2000 and was
probably well under that sum.
"Since the holdups of a few
months ago, particularly the
Cedar Cottage affair, the Royal
Bank tellers and cashiers are instructed only to take out sufficient specie and bills from the vault
to do for the day's business," he
explained. " It is highly improbable that the staff at Abbotsford
had more than $2000 out this
rooming. In fact, I was informed
by Manger Morley that while he
could not at the time give the
exact total he placed it about
$15000."
According- to the story told by
Teller Johnston five men, all of
them dark and swarthy in appearance, roughly dressed and heavily
armed, rushed into the bank at
about 10.30 o'clock. The staff
members were all behind the
counters at the time. Two. of
them, after shouting unintelligibly wheeled around and stood
at the door facing outside. The
other three ran to the teller's
cage and before any one had
time to pick up a revolver the
three thugs faced them with
guns pointed through the wicket
and demanded what they had.
Johnston promptly pushed the
bills and coin he had on the counter through the wicket.
He had several thousand
dollars more in the vault but the
hold ups were apparently content
with what they had and as soon
as they got their hands on the
. money they ran out through the
doorway. As they ran they fired
off their pistils and shouted and
yelled:
Provincial Constable Foster
and other members of the force
are on the track of the five
desperadoes. '•
Harry Delvin, inspector of
mines left for Nanaimo on Thursday.
Wf't
PLACE FOUND GUILTY
New Westminster. March 7
On Monday Mr. John Place, M.
L. A. for Nanaimo, will take his
place in the prisoner's dock in
the Assize Court here to plead-to
the charges of rioting and un
lawful assembly at Nanaimo
August 12, 1913. The crown
alleges that Mr. Place was a
prominent member of the disorderly crowd which mishandled
an old miner named Booth and
Special Constable Bridges. Further than that they claim that he
incited the strikers, by an inflammatory speech. While the
Provincial House was in session
Mr. Place could not be arraigned
without his own consent, but
now the House is prorogued he is
to be tried. Mr. Place has already
appeared in the special Assize
Court as a witness in defence of
Joe Angelo. Mr. A. Dunbar
Taylor, K. C. will appear for the
crown, and Mr. Israel Rubinowitz for the accused.
New Westminster, March 10—
John Place Socialist member in
the Provincial Legislature for
Nanaimo, was convicted in the
special Assize Court here last
evening of unlawful assembly at
Nanaimo on August 12, 1913.
His counsel, Mr. Israel Rubinowitz, asked Mr. Justice Morrison
to pass immediate sentence or to
remand the prisoner and allow
him out on his own recognizance,
but his lordship refused the request, saying he could not discriminate in favor of tiie prisoner.
Mr. Place was arraigned on
two charges, that of .'rioting and
unlawful assembly. The first
count against him failed. The
evidence was similar to that
given in a number of cases tried
recently arising out of what is
known in court parlance as
Nanaimo Riot No. 3.
The regular meeting of the
Board of Licencing Commisson-
ers was held in the Council
Chambers on Wednesday evening
Present: Mayor Campbell, Com-
missionersMcDonald andMcLean.
Minutes of the last regular and
special meeting were adopted as
read. Commissioner McLean reported that he with Commissioner McDonald had visited and inspected all the city hotels and
found them up to the standard
with the exception of the Vendome which he said needed some
improvements made to the fire
escapes and the furnishings. On
motion the Vendome was given
six weeks to repair their fire
escapes. Mr. Demonte one of the
proprietors of the Vendome who
was present promised to comply
with the wishes of the Board as
early as possible. The meeting
adjourned until May 1.
Dr. D.E. Kerr dentist will be
in Cumberland March 24th and
following days.
T. D. McLean left for Denman
Island on Thursday morning.
A Tango Party Dance will be
held in the Cumberland Hall on
Friday evening the 20th. All
kinds of amusement is promised
for those who attend. Refreshments will be served including
Mexican hot|tomales. Admission,
Gents $1 Ladies 6oc,
MINERS HAVE
INSURANCE SCHEME
Western Fuel Employees Con.
tribute to Relative** of Mine
Victim
The Nanaimo Herald publishes
The appended supplementary a-
greement of the main agreement
entered into between the Western Fuel Company and its employees will explain itself. It
merely incorporates in the shape
of an agreement the sense of
certain resolutions unanimously
passed by the men at their mass
meetng on Thursday nornihg.
The clause relating to the Spract-
ice that will be followed in the
case of an accident will be generally endorsed and the credit of
the change as observed in the
Herald yesterday belongs to the
late Mr. John L. Howard. The
full text of this supplementary
agreement is as follows:
Supplement to Agreement dated the sixth day of March, 1914.
between the Western Fuel Company and its employees represented by the agreement committee—
"A"—It is agreed that in the
event of a fatal accident occurring in the Mines, or in event of
a death resulting from injuries
received in the Mines, that the
operation of the Mine in which
the accident occured shall not be
suspended on the day of the funeral of the deceased party, but
that any employee wishing to absent himself from work for the
purpose of attending the funeral
shall have the privilege af doing
so.
All Employees working on the
morning, afternoon and night
shifts of the day of the funeral
agree to contribute the sum of
One Dollar ($1) per man and
fifty cents (SOc) per boy to a
fund to be given to the nearest
relative of the deceased party.
The Company agrees to duplicate the sum contributed by the
Employees,
For the purposes of this section all Employees whose daily
wage is less than Three Dollars
($3.00) per shift shall be considered as boys.
The*. Company is authorized to
make collections for this Fund
from the payroll of its Employees
in manner similar toother collections.
Nothing in this Section shall
relieve the Company of any obligation under the Workmen's
Compensation Act, hor shall it
relieve the Employees of their
obligation to the Medical Relief
and Accident Fund.
"B"—It is agreed that month
ly meetings of the Management
of the Company nad the Agreement Committee shall be held on
the first Wednesday of each
month at two o'clock in the after
noon at the Company's General
Office.
Special Meetings may be called
at any time by the Management
of the Company or the Chairman
of the Committee, due notice
of such meeting to be given all
parties.
LOCAL NEWS.
Local News on back page.
J. R. Lockard, general manager of the Canadian Collieries
[Dunsmuir] Ltd. returned from
Victoria and Ladysmith by auto
on Tuesday and left again Thursday morning.
[ W. H. White returned from
Vancouver on Tuesday. While
away he purchased the instruments for the West Cumberland
Conservative Band who commenced practicing last evening
with 18 pieces.
The members of thei West
Cumberland Conservative Band
will hold a basket social on Monday evening in the Club Hall,
Ladies are requested to bring the
baskets and gentlemen will be
pleased to purchase them. The
profits are for the Band.
PROVINCIAL POLICE COURT
Before Jas. Abrams S.M.
Edward Woods and Richard
Grimes appeared before His Worship on Tuesday charged with
cutting and stealing timber from
section 27 at Royston. The presiding magistrate committed the
accused for trial.
Woods and Grimes appeared
before His Honor Judge Barker
at Nanaimo on Thursday. Woods
pleaded guilty to cutting the timber and employing Grimes for
which he was fined $100 and $50
costs. The case against Grimes
was dismissed.
POULTRY
Owing to the efforts of the
B. C. Poultry Association the
authorities at Ottawa are at last
beginning to realize that the
poultry breeders of this Province
have a genuine grievance.
Several resolutions have been
fowarded to various officals at
Ottowa, asking that the Contagious Diseases of Animals Act be
amended so that the Dominion
Veterinary Inspectors could inspect all live and dead poultry
entering the Province. Conside: ■
able live poultry is being import
ed, ostensibly for the purpose of
killing for the markets, but are
however, being sold to settlers at
reduced prices. In some consign
ments the majority of the fowls
have been found to be suffering
from one or the other of the
contagious diseases attacking
poultry. These fowls have been
sold broad-cast throughout the
Province, the result being that
in some districts which have
heretofore been healthy, poultry
breeders have had these diseases
attack thei- flocks
Word has just been received
by the Secretary of the Provincial Poultry Association, stating
that Mr. J. H. Hare of the
Poultry Division. Department of
Agriculture, Ottowa, is to visit
the Province and make an investigation into the-ma*ter. In
the meantime, the Provincial
Association is leaving no stone
unturned io secure redress, and
in March all of the affiliated
Associations numbering 28, are
forwarding a resolution to the
Veterinary Director General
dealing with the matter.
MEETING Of
CITY COUNCIL
Mr. M. Manson, M.P.P., Notifies
Council that Sidewalk Act
hat Passed Legislature.
The regular meeting of the
City Council was held in the
Council Chambers on Monday
evening. Present: Mayor Campbell, Aldermen McDonald, Banks
Parnham, Miller, Mitchell and
Maxwell.
The minutes of the previous
meeting were read and adopted.
The city clerk read a communication from Mr. M. Mason M. P.
P. notifying the council that an
Act enabling the mayor and
council of the City of Cumberland to pass an assessment bylaw for the purpose* of raising
the necessary funds to pay for
the cement sidewalks which have
been constructed on Dunsmuir
Avenue had passed the Local
Legislature and was ready for the
assent of the Lieutenant Governor.
This will allow the Council to
prepare the necessary assessment
by-law and relieve the individuals
responsible to the Royal Bank of
Canada. ,
It was moved and seconded
that Mr. Mason be tendered a
vote of thanks for his energetic
services in connection with the
passing of the by-law which was
carried unanimously.
City Constable John R. Gray
handed in the following report
of collections for the month of
February;
Scavenger ,,-..    $97.50
Hall Rent „ 40.00
Pilsener Brewing Co.    2.50
The city council received a
list of the City Band instmmen's
from Constable Gray which is as
follows:
One E flat piccolo, one B flat
cornet, one E flat alto, at present
in possession of George Swift and
J. Little; two B flat euphomians,
one B flat trombone, these instruments are in Robert McNeil's
charge; B flat bass, Felix Berarer;
bass drum, R. James; B flat cornet Herman Dillman; B flat
cornet, Alex Robertson; E flat
alto, Thomas Robertson. The
following are held in the Fire
Hall for safe keeping : one B flat
cornet, one E flat alto, three B flat
baritone, three B flat basses and
one small drum:
■Some discussion arose as to
what should be done with these
instruments. Three of the alderman thought that they should be
held in charge by the city official
and made a motion to that effect
when the remaining three aldermen made an amendment that a
city band trustee be apipointed
The mayor gave his casting vote
in favor of the amendment. Aid
John Miller and the city constable
wore appointed band trustees
who will be held responsible for
the instruments,
The secretary of tho Board of
Trade made application for the
use of the Council Chambers on
the first Friday of each month
as a meeting pla-re for the Board
of Trade, which was granted.
The following accounts were
received and referred to the finance committee;
Simon Leiser & Co $6.70
MacFarlane Bros 60
Daniel Kilpatrick  16.60
Total 23.70
Aid. McDonald Banks and
Maxwell were appointed a committee to interview the Cumberland Electric Lighting Co. Ltd.
and endeavour to make arrangement for improved lights for the
streets.
The Council went into committee of the whole to consider the
assessment roll and adjourned to
meet again on Monday evening
next.
REV,
F. FRANKLIN-WATSON
GOES TO COMOX.
The Reverend and Mrs.
Franklin Watson removed to
Comox Bay today where they
will permanently reside,
Mr. Watson will still be Vicar
of Cumberland although not resident here.
The Reverend A. Wells of
Nanaimo has accepted the a-
ppointment of assistant to Mr.
Watson and will reside at tbe
Vicarage here but cannot enter
upon his duties until next May.
In the meantime two services
will be maintained as usual. On
Sunday next' the Rev. C. R,
Littler M. A. of Victoria will
officiate at both services.
MILLINERY OPENING.
The millinery opening at Simon Leiser & Co. Ltd. on Thursday was the outstanding event
of the week in the Ladies Realm.
This department had a most
choice assortment of ladies
models including some very
smart Parisian pattern hats. Quite
a number of ladies were equally
surprised at the extensive showing of exclusive hats. This
department under the supervision
of Mrs. Clifford is worthy of
comparison with the showings
made in much larger cities.
The styles this season are very
unique and most becoming to the
face. High stuck up trimmings at
front and back are very noticable
with touches of jet which is quite
a large feature this season in
dress as well as hats.
One model was very much admired, a leghorn turned up edge,
covered crown of figured satin
and saxe feather mount sticking
up at front.
Another designed by Mrs. Clifford from the latest millinery
paper was soon sold. This was a
black and white crinoline covered
hat with high side trimmed wv*h
red roses and a high bow of
black moire ribbon with jet
buckle.
Another exclusive Parisian
model was greatly admired. This
had flame figured vef-fel ^<#B"
with satin and braid' famed ;t.p
brim and grass osprey mount
trimmed front to back.
A pleasing innovation was the
afternoon t"a served on the bal-'
cony by Mrs. H. Wilson (nee
Walker) who looked after the
comforts of the many patrons. 1THE ISCANDEH. CUMBERLAND, B.C.
^
IM CONQUERS 111
a\
Oil* i
J
. people would Up I* ft tiappier for liis
presence; but liis thoughts, as ever.
circled round one poison—a Bllm. fair-
hatred blue-eyed girl; and there was
Deepshot Wood beckoning him on*
wards and ;; dead man crying for ven-
Seaoce,
lie wanted to see hint onee again,
tliis Oscar ScrtL-whoin o stranger had
accused him of killing. He had loo!*-
,t*d on his fac? once, he wanted to look
' again, to make sure he was uot the
subject of an hallucination. He eared
little or nothing nnv. for the danger he
;ran of discovery.
! lie tethered his horse to » fence in
the roadside and then climbing over,
'made his way through the bracken.
He remembered the spot, nevertheless
It took him some time to find it.
And he gazed down with curiously
| mingled feelings of horror and rcpul-
ion at lhat which had at oue lime
been a man. Even in the chort time
that bud elapsed since his death, a
dreadful chauge had tahen place, :.*>
don-no woman could forgive him | tlrc-iulful that lletheringion found him-
that! This Oscar Soral whose body "W tretpbllpB from head to foot. Lut
lay. hidden in Deepsho: Wood vus,|"°t llt the commaml of .•onsckuice,
Carmen had Informed him, hor coualhJ ttlmoflt wishea the rtead llia" v;oUld
(BY ARTHUR APPLIN)
Ward, Lock & Co., Limited, London, Melbourne and Toronto
.Contlll'ied)
for some sirango Instinct warned I
Hetherlngton that perhaps   sin*   too,
loved him.     If that were the caBe. sho ,
mighty he knew, forgive him when he,
told her th I truth concerning his home; *
coming.   She might even forgive him,'
were he a murderer—but to have made
love to her while he had a wire living
in secret under another name in Lon-
He!
They had used his name to avoid their
Identity and her father's anger at her
marriage with a foreigner. But what
his Quarrel had been
aline and accuse h|m; he prayed aloud
that hlo own conscience  ifould feel
either terror or remorse, am', crying
with Soral still ont, accuse him.       But   neither   the
the conscience of the
remained a mystery.   He had threat-dead man. nor
ened to betray them, hut that was a; living, spoke.
side issue; us fnr as he cmld guess. |    Slowly and wit.i ever increasing hor*
a lni'ge sum of money was involved, ror Hetherington began to realize that
the .hange which lad taken place in
Apparently then, It was for money he
had murdered! Ye,, just as he
could not get himself to believe that
lie had committed thc crit-* > so now
he was .'.lone and carefully and coldly
reviewed the events of the past week,
he found it difficult to believe that he
was really and truly Carmen's lawful
husband. Was it likely, he asked
himself a thousand times, that he
could live with her so long under an
assumed name? But with his own eyes
he had seen their certificate cr marriage properly made out anl testified.
Even then, there was another loophole of escape, but one of which he
was half ashamed.
If he only knew! lt was the dreadful uncertainty which day by day sap-
pod his strength and threatened to rob
him of sanity. If only he knew he
were vile, it would be easier to pity
the man and lace the consequences, *r
else take his own life and rid the
world of a scoundrel. Sometimes as
he paced the great empty rooms of
the old Hall, ,ic would halt in front
of a mirror and look at his reflection,
questioning it—Aro you a cheat, a
thief a murderer? And his relied ion
alwnys shook its head and smiled sadly and hopelessly. But the eyes
which looked back into his own denied each accusation boldly.
Yet he had proof!—damning evidence. Proof In the luxurious little
flat at Knlghtshridge in London, proof
in the dark untrodden depths of Deep-
shot Wood on the moorlands!
At the end of a week there was very
little he did not know about his estate
and his tenants. Tlie former had
been well looked after by old McTurggot but with a strict eyo to economy, a-ccordlng to instructions left him
many years ago. The tenants had
to look after their own inti'-ests. But
now Hetherlngton was changing all
that. He directed that the money bo
Bpent lavishly in repairing houses and
cottages on tho land and in reclaiming
waste places of the moor; he increased his laborers' wages and reduced
theli rents. McTurggot remonstrated with him and advised caution, bu.
he turned a deaf ear. Before ht went
away—:ere It to the ends of the earth
or to another i.i.d perhaps better life
—he determined to put his house in
order and leave those with whom he
had como In contact bette*.* ar.d happier for ids b.lef sojourn esmong them.
One afternoon he was riding home
across tho moorlands, painfully conscious that tbere waa now nothing left
for him to do at Cranby, when he saw
the grim outline of the lll-fatcd Peeo*
shot Wood a mile or so awaS' on his
right. Acting on a subconscious suggestion, he turned his horse'.! bead In
that direction.. There was nothing
more for him to do except i draw up
his will, which he had already outlined
ind say good-bye.     At any rale some
BABY MI COVERED
Could Not Sleep Day or Night,
Itched and Burned Terribly, Cuticura Soap and Ointment Cured
in a Month,   Also Cured Mother
of Salt Rheum,
 .
Quarry villi'. '•:. B.— " l-'tir a month ufir-r
my baby iviih liern Im could not. nloi*|i (lay
er'nt-Mit jritli eczema.   He v.t.3 oil covered
/**-*•*    "%*. plmplol whlrli would
Rj^™**^ ,-_ lirrakiiiailuyortivo
V^j, -*, ttfi jra**V andloavoahumoury
X .1 Wv^ffvA scab and would Itch
*\~*Jr\ 'iila", »iiiJlmiiitciTilily.11«
/^C^>^^-*V,< scratched so much
\ /^C   ro "l:lL '10 n,a(*a sores.
\ >P*^sj\ JIi9 skin burned all
\ ^^la—^j 1 tlio time and when
llio scab came oir it left llttlo marks llko
chlckon-pox. At last I saw Outicura Soap
nnd Olnlment advcrtlM-d. aU.crtlio nrstapplication bo rested easier. I applied tlio
Cutlcura Ointment lightly and after an
hour 1 would wash him with Cutlcura Soap.
After a month's treat men, ho was cured.
"I was greatly troubled v.IUi salt a-lieum
on my hands. They broke out in littlo
watery pimples and would bo so itchy 1
could tear them to pieces. Then they would
dry up and crack and bleed and when I put
them ia water tho diacoso would cat In to tlio
bonei*. 'J'liey were so painful I had to keen
|i*?m Hnd up with cot'oi* men. I could not
■do any work. Ono bos of Cutlcura Glut-
jnent wii I't'"»*",'**'*',aa*a ''*-iap cured them.'!
(Signed) Mrs. Oratuw, July 31,1013.
CuiIcuit Soap and Cuticurc. Ointment aro
aolil by dmugluls and dealers everywhere.
For a liberal free, sample of each, wi' ii 32-p.
book, send post-card lo 1'ollcr Drug ec Cheat.
Corp., Pcpt. *f. Huston, u. 8. A.
Oscar Soral'8 features waa not tho
work of tlm.:. Nature hae not disfigured and destroyed the face which
now scarcely bore any resemhlnnce to
humanity; some wild beast or liend
in human ibape had been at work.
Something—somo one—had. mauled
.and cut and obi!..-rated!
Horror drove lletherington headlong from the wood and running,
jumping and stumbling, he reached
the road and flung himself Into his
saddle again. Sick with tlie sight he
had witnessed, he set his horse galloping towards C inby, ljever pulling rein
until he reached the steep descent to
the village.
Gradually reason assumed sway over
bis emotions. Ther. wa : some one
in tlie world besides himself who feared the dead ..ian! Some one apparently whose fear wns even greater than
his own! And then a ghastly question obtruded Itself. Had It heen his
work—the work of cue member of his
dual Identity? Did he walk in his
sleep, or were there days of whicli in
his present slate of mind he was utterly unconscious, when a dangerous
maniac he wns set looso upon the
world to '.ill and destroy?
The reins hur.g loosely o.i his horse's
neck; now he sat hunched up in his
saddle, overcome hy"the terror of the
afternoon. There was nothing to be
done but to do. and that without a moment's delay. He would pay off Saluzo—the past didn't matter, the horror
and difficulties of the present o'ver-
shadowed it* He would make his will
and Lurry ba- . 'to the old places,
where there would be no one he could
harm or hurt.
4nd then, as his horse crossed the
bridge which spanne the moorland
stream, he raised his head nid saw
Peggy Mellon standing jus', ut the
place where they had first met! He
raised his hat mechanically and would
have avoided her but she supped into
tlie road and "lopped him.
Well. Sir -.ieorge. you have been
hack over a wee'* and haven't heen
near us. Father insists that I have
offendeC you hy poaci...**: or som *-
1hing.     Have IV
He shook his head, for a moment
finding words difficult. The wind had
blown her hair across her eyes, the
sun-kissed face was raised to his her
simple little walking frock emphasized
tlie slim outline of her : 'rlish figure.
I have heen busy, putting things in order before I g   away, he stammered.
What I going away again? she laughed.
He took a deep breath and nlmost
felt relieved that s'-ic didn't care. No-
Ihing much mattered if ho didn't hurt
Iter.
Yes. I am toing away, he Bald, vainly trying to steady his vole:. I was
coming up to-night or to-morrow to
say good-bye.
He gave her one c.ulck glance and
saw her change color. She did cure
then? She knew he loved her and—
miracle of itracles—and yet an added
horror—she. too. loved him! The
knowledge was almost more Ihan he
could hear. Ho swayed in ills saddle
and his hand went up to ' !s throat;
he wished he could take his own life
then and tliere.
Going away for a long lime? ITer
voice cams llko lhe wind from tin
moorlands—came and wort like spent
music,
A long lime, a long journey — fur
ever!
He had said It and he pushed his
horse forward.
But Peggy lnld her hand on his
bridle.     And yo   told me before you
lett	
She was touching him now. Ihm* "»'•*
head brushed his knee; thc scent of
her hair, like the scent of the goiso
on the hills, filled bis nostrils. And
—now. I've something els? to tell you,
something I dare tell no livln;, creature
in the world, and when I've told you,
you'll hate me.
She shoo': her head hut made no
reply.
But perhaps you wouldn't believe me
—It is unbelievable.
(To be Continue*.)
'.AM-BUK
MRS.  A.  SAICH,  of
Cannington Manor, Sasl;..
Writes:—"My brother suffered severely from eczema.
The sores were very extensive, and burned like coalt
into his llesh, Zam-Buk took
out all the fire, and quickly
Rave him case. Within three
weeks of commencing with
Zam-Buk treatment, every
sore had been cured."
This is but one cf the many
letters we are constantly receiving
from people who have proved the
healing powers of Zam-Buk. For
eczema, piles, sores, burns, cuts
and all skin troubles there il
nothing like this wonderful balm.
No skin disease should be considered incurable until Zam-Buk
has beta tiled.
All Dnsfgisls, 50c. pet Box.
Refuse Suoslitates.
He Took Chances
A judge In a \Vestcrn town had declared that ho would stop thc carrying
of firearms on the street. Before him
appeared for trial a tough youth
charged with getting drunk and firing
his revolver in a crowded street.
Twenty dollars and costs, said the
nfagistrate.
But, your honor, interposed couusel
for the prisoner, my client did not hit
anybody.
Why you admit he fired the gun.
Yes, but he f.red it into the air. explained the lawyer.
Twenty dollars and costs, repeated
the judge. He might have shot an
angel.
Puzile—Where Was He?
It happened the other evening, nnd
now a certain clubman is trying to figure out how he will square things
with bis wife '.he next time he is detained 'owntown. He was not going
home for dinner and when bis' wife
answered the telephone, he said:
Don't wait for me at dinner ihls evening, dear. I shall be detained on
business.
Very well, she replied. I am sorry you can't come home; bnt business
is business, 1 suppese. Where are
you now?
Were nm I? In my office of
course.     I have hi-'. a very busy day.
It's too bad you have to work so
hard, George.   But tell me ' Jinethlng.
Yes. dear.     What Is It.'
How can ;ou keep your mind -n
business with lie orchestra playing
'livery Little Movement?'
Mlnard's  Linlirun'. Cures lilphtherla
What the Queen Die!
One of the Ladles-.u-W-alttag to tho
late Queen Victoria had . very bright
little daughter about fou. years old,
and of whom lho Queen was very fond.
Tho Queen iuv.ted the child to have
lunch with her. Of course the mother was highly pleased, and charged
the little girl to be very careful about
her table manners and to be very polite to the Queen.
The little girl camo home In high
glee and her mother asked her all
about tho luncheon.
Were you u "cry polite little girl,
and did you remember to d.. all I told
you at the table? asked tho proud
mother.
Oh, yes. I wns polite, said the little
girl, but tho Queen wasn't.
The Queen wasn't, said the mother.
Why, what did she do?
She tool: her chicken bone up In
her lingers and I just shook my finger
at her, like you do at me, and said;
Piggy. piggy-
Why Did. She Think Sc?
No, said tbe mhtress ot the boarding house, we cannoi nccainmodato
you, I nm sorr. to sty. We ouly take
in single gentlemen. .
Goodness! sah'. Mr. Borden| whnt
makes you think 1 anl twins?
SKII" CLE,     *D
By -Simple Change In I
ood
About Poetry
There's Isn't much In vrltlng po-ry,
Big  pay   for  clover  rhyming  is  a
myth;
A very lucky bard, indeed, Is he
Whose Ode to Keats pal's what he
owed lo Smith.
W. N* U* 985
How it was Done
!    Here, sa.ii tiie assistant io ifci ""a*
ager ot tht great patent-medicine firm,
lis n fellow wil writes: I don't seo
j   iw vou can have the nerve to s
your worthies:* remedy for fifty cents
a bottle.
1   That's nil ngl.t, said the manager.
Just .trlke out the words, hnve the
I nerve to, nnd worthless at.d put it in
the testimonials.
It has been said by a physician that
most diseases arc the resal: of indl-
• islion.
There's undoubtedly much Iriilh In
lhe sti.tement, ever tp the cause of
niauy unsightly eruptions, which many
suppose can bo removod by applying
some remedy on tuf o.*.tsido.
By changing :r food :*. Western
girl was rcllo ed of an eczema which
was n great at uoyanco to her. 'She
writes:
"For five months j was suffering
with an eruption on my faco and
hands which our doctor called eczema : nil which caused me a .T'eat deal
of inconvenience. The offering was
nlmost unbearable.
"Tho medicine I took only gave me
temporary relief. Oue icy 1 happened to read somewhere that eczema was
I caused by Indigestion. Then I read
that many persons had been relieved
of indigestion by eating Grape-Nuts.
"I decided to try it. I liked tho
taste of the fooa anil* was pa*.Ocularly
pleased to not!'8 that mj digestion
was improving and that the eruption
was disappearing If by magic. I
had at last found, in ,his gi at food,
something thct reached my trouble.
"When I find a victim of this affliction I remember niy own former
' suuering and advise a trial of Grape*
Nuts food instead of medicines.
Name give by Canadian I'osium
Co Windsor, Ont. Pet.J 'Tiitj 'rtoad
to Wellville," In pkgi'* "Ther-'s, a
Iteoson "
Ever read the above letter. A new
one appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true, and full oi hum. '
Interssi.
The Good Samarh.-n and the Sinner
A good naturod man going home
late at nigh: spied a man leaning
limply against a doorway.
What's the matter? he asked;
diunk?
Vep.
Want me lo help you in?
Yep. a
With difficulty he carried Uie drooping figure up      the second floor.
ls this it?   Do you live here?
Yep.
Bather than face nn nngry wife the
good natured' man opened the first
door, pushed the limp figure in and
closed tlie door. Then he groped
way downstairs. As In came out he
saw another man apparently in worse
condition than tbo flrst.
What's the mutter, he asked, you
drunk, too?
Yep, came tho feeble answer.
Shall I help you upstairs?
Yep.
The good Sama'itan carried him
to the second floor, whero this man
also said he lived, opened the same
door und pushed him in.
As he again reached the street he
saw : third man evidently worse off
tban eith.jr of the others. As the
good Samaritan anpronched, however,
the man fled up the street anl throw
hiinscir into tho -.rms r<* a passing
policeman.
Officer, he gasped. I demand protection from this nan. He's carried
me upstairs twice and thro* t me down
the elevator 3hatt.
The Ingenious Neighbor
Have you examined my piano? asked the young lady
Yes, ma'am, answered tae piano-
tuner.
What's the reason it won'; make a
sound?
Some one .ins lowered tho soft pedal and nailed it down.
A Gentl- Reminder
Smith is a young New York'lawyer,
Clever :'• many ways, but very forgetful. He was recently sent to St. Lou-
Is to Interview an important client ln
regard to a caBe then pending in the
Missouri court". Later the head of
his f.rm received this telejram from
St. Louis:
Have forgotten name uf client.
Please w*ire at onco.
This was tho reply sent from New
York.
Client's name Jenkins. Your name
Smith.
Business for Father
Tho small daughter of a practicing
physician, wliii evidently lias an eye
to business, told her mothe- ii. no un-
cert.-in terms that she must call at
once on their n w neigh   r.
And why must I call o- her? asked
the mother amused at tho child's pos-
ltlvenessi
Well, in the flrst place, explained
the llttlo lady', they have got three nf
the scrawniest kids, and the mother
1 erself doesn't look very strbnc,
Wanted to See
Woodrow Wilson has a *.ary Quick
wit. A man, In tho course of nn animated conversation, noticing that Mr.
Wilson's eyeglasses wero *.etched per-
iously near thc tip of his nose, remarked: Your glasses, Governor, are
almost on your mouth.
That's all right, was the ipiick response. ■ I want tc see whut I am
talking about.
Beware u. -aintmenis mf Catarrh
that Contain Mercury,
as mercury will surely destroy the sense (it pnwli
and completely dt-raam, llie wliole System when
entcrmv 11 tliroiijUi ttio mucous enrlac****. Sucb
.rill*'*, ennui*! never Ue used eaccnl on prnscrlp.
tions rom reputable pbyslclans. aa llie damage tbey
wlll do 1. ten lold to tlie rood you can powlbly do.
rive Irom them. Hall's catarrh Cure, manulactured
by F. J. Cheney ft Co.. Toledo, O., contains ho mcr*
sury. and ts laden Internally, actlnc directly upon
thc blood and-mucous surfaces of pie system. Io
buylnu Hall's catarrh Cum bo sure you aet thc
genuine, lt Is Uhen Internally and made in Toleoa
Ohio, by 1'. J. Cheney ft Co. TMUmomats Ire*.
Bold by Ilnne'-**. Price. TDc. per botUa,
■take Han's Femur PUIa lor conatipatinss..
Heard at th- Caleb
Young   Hardnnn   so'vi   his   erand-
fntber wnc  -in., of lb" nr«-t settlers.
Not  Inherited,   evidently;   Hardline
"ever  settles.
Oh!  erelillnieil the Utile elrl ro the
"■* nurse, must T sleep In the dark to-
nii-W?
Yes, Mlsn, replied the nurse.
Then wnlt n minute, Bill*" the l'lll»
elrl; I'll ee*t up and say my prayers
more carefully.
An Expeniilve Library  '
Robert linwsnll wns fam*>ns for thc
lihrirv of Infidel hooks which ho possessed.
Ore dnv a reporter called on Mr
In-ersoll for on Intorvlflw, nnd among
olbe- otiestlons nsked 'van:
Would yon mln*! telling me how
much * ur library cost yjli, Mr. In-
rot-soil? -   *
.Looking over at his.shelves he answered :
Well, mv boy. theso hno'*s cost mn
...ivhow the Governorship of Illinois,
nnd perliaes the Presidency of tho
United Stales.
Mlnard's Liniment Cures   Garget   In
Cows
Interesting
Oh, he's de'.lgttful company! I just
love to hear him talk.
What does he talk about?
Me.
She Wa*.:. Veteran Too
Old Mr. Anderson, who was fond of
relating stories ot the war, after the
Christmas dinner was over mentioned
having been in five engagements.
. That's not so much, .aid little Edgar
suddenly.
Why Kdgar,  cried his scandalized
mother; what do you mean.''
Five isn't many,  persisted Edgar;
sister Edna lias been engaged nine
times.
INTERNUM]
STOCK
FOOD
fc-tcp^Uo-Ko. coirs. shftepanu-pirjEmsiicl- ,-rimc ecmdt*
tion. bt?cau*3(. it -.slcomposcO ol lht> &nnic i.eiba roots.
seed:: and Iwirhr. that thcee mm:,nit ent lrccl.v *rlie»
rumiinL' v.-fld, \Vc fjriutl tlixsc ten lucrticitial f-ubstnnottt
tc i i.nc bdwdtr, mU.tlicm Ujorpurthh and rive them
«" you :.*c their best, «: Jt:tt.riialioiia. b'loch Food.
Thi*: is vrh> ft trtbLspcoiinii ci ji.tcni^ticBai atoct Pood
with .he rcfifttlot Rraia tccd tontr up the system ci horses, civet
taca ncv.* ilic. and n, frloEsycoat ct hair.  It ir tht bestthiiip
?rou enn (rtyti a horcc foi indltrtt-tiou liver ircmiit. coughs.'
r,t.-.:u..*.a hide .)ct!nd o; olootl trouble, international Stock
Fooalf. ■.(H'.allygoc*. ior liorscfc ccltU,t.heep nntihoRS, Micceps
tlie c", r,tt::u in a hcalth> condition una oronioteF lapid growth.
For rale by dcahrt* everywhere. i ■ i
INTERnATIONAi. STOCH FOOD CO HUTTED. TOtlNTO. Oat., Can,
I.
i*i* * • *" *•> *t * few
Out of the Mouth ot Babes
A clergyman famous for hia begging
abilities was onee catechizing a Sunday school. When comparing himself as pastor of tho church to a shepherd, and his congregation to the sheep
he put the a'ollowlng question to the
children: What does the shepherd do
for the sheep?
To the confusion of the minister a
small boy In tho front pew piped out;
Shears thorn!
When Hollowaj's Corn Cure is applied to a corn or wart lt kills the
roots and ths callosity comes out without    jury to the flesh.
He Had It In Him
Children, said the teacher, Instructing the class it composition, you
should not attempt any flights of fancy. Do not, imitate any other person's wrltlugs nor draw Inspiration
from outside sources.
As a result of this advice one bright
lad turned ln tho following: We
should not attenint any flights of fancy, but write whnt Is in Js. In mo
there "Is my stommlck. lungs, heart,
liver, two apples, on*1 piece of pie. one
stick of lemot candy and my dinner.
An Exceedingly Polite Man
Two men , ere talking about polite^
nesa In public when one oi them skid!
vVell, President* Taft is the most polite man In iho world.
How is thn? nsl .d his companion.
Why I was or. the street car in
Cincinnati one dey before Taft became President, nnd some ladles came
in r.ud Judge Taft gave hi seat to
thre.? of thee.
Putting Off the Ev.   Hour
A young lawyer was defending an
old convict on the charge ot burglary
In a State where the court rules allowed each aide one hour to address
the Jury. The young lawyer, somewhat nervous, consulted a veteran
member of tin bar who hrppened to
be standing near: aw much time do
you think I should take up in addressing the Jury? he asked ln a rather
pompous manner.
Take the full hour, was the gruB
reply.
But why?
Becuuse the longer you tal- the longer you will keep your client out ot
jail.
The Worth en an Antique
An old mdy wan searching In the
dim bric-a-brac shop for somsthlng odd
to take home with her. Finally she
noticed a quaint figure, the head and
shoulde-,-. of which appeared above
the counter nt the farthest end of the
room. Sho turfd to the clerk and
:ald' "What's tht' queer old Japanese
idol orer there worth?"
The clerlt answered in a subdued
tone: "About fifty thousand dollars
Ma'ai.i.   That's the'iroprletor."
They had broken a wishbone together,
What was It you wlshrd'f laughed
she.
I wished that you'd let in? kiss you;
Now tell :po your wish, said he.
Her eyes tell—s',io paused a moment,
While her blushes deeper grew.
My wish wns. slit prettily r.tamniered.
That what you wished would conn
true.
It Didn't Matter to Hhn
Dick heard of Lou's engagement and
went around to congratulate him.
Well, old bo>, cried Dick, as he
grasped hi? friend's hand, my congratulations! Is It truo that you are engaged to ono of* the pretty Robblns
twins?
Yes, replied Lou heartily. I am
happy to say It Is so.
But, inquired Dick, how do you ever
tell them apart.
I don't try to, wi.i the reply.
Easy Mark
Madge—I hear he's very sweet on
you.
Mnrjorie—Itathcr! . Ke'c good for
ab ,ut two pounds of candr e-*ery week.
To the thim all years are lean
years.
■   _'______- .)   -trr=
GOT CORNS?
Foolish to keep them If you have. No
fun lu corns, ls there? But plenty ot
pain. Putnam's Palnles Corn Extractor raises corns ln twenty-four
hours. Don't you want to gel a quick
crop? You cat by UBlng P.utnaa.i's
painless Corn-Extractor; ' s name tells •
its story.    Price 2E<-., all druggists
Tl    Differor.-e
Harvey, aged live, was being Instructed by hla grandmothj;* ln morals. She told him that all aach terms
as 'by golly,' 'by Jingo,' 'by'thunder,"
were only little oaths, nnd but llttlo
better than r 'ie' profanities,
You can always tell en oath, my
hoy, she said, by the prolix 'by.' An
such are oatha. .*    ■
Well,, then, Grandma, asked the
young hopeful, Is 'by telegraph,' which
I see In the newspapers, swearing?
No. Harvey, replied Crar.dma; that'l
frequently only lying.
Miller's Worm Powders purge the
stomach and Intestines ot worms o
effectively and so easily and painlessly that the most delicate stomach will
not feel any Inconvenience from their
action They recomn. ni' themselves
to mothers as a preparation that will
restore strength and vigor to their
children and protect them from tht
debilitating effects which result from
the depredations of worms.
Stingy
Even after wo are married, wooed
the ardent lover. I shall always b»
close to you.
And 11 was.
When the butcher answered the telephone the shrll voice o.' .*. little girl
greeted him.
Hello!     Is that Mr. Wilson?
Yes. Be.'ste, he answe.e;" kindly,
whnt can I i'o for you?
Oh. Mr. Wilso. please .el. mo where
Grandpa's liver Is! The fol'.-s are out
and I've got to put a hot flannel on it
nnd I don't know where It ls.
And the Owner Said—
illchard Brlnsley Sherldar. was one
day coming back from shooting with
an empty bag,. He did not llko to go
homo without one bird, and seeing a
number of ducks In a pond, nnd a
farmer leaning on a rail watching
then,, Sheridar said: What*will you
take for a Bhot at the ducks?
Oh, said the stranger, about half a
sovereign.
Done! said Sturldan, ...id paying th»
man, he fired Into this middle of thej
flick, killing a Jo/.en ducks.
I am afraid you mado a bad bar* |
tain, he said.
Well, I don't ltnow, replied the man, \
they weren't my ducks.
F°£
Defying the Militants
Tourist  (in lonuon)--It certain!*;
took a bunch *.' bobbies to arrest that
silk-hatted guy!     What dh. he^do?
Cabby—W'y, that blecdlr." blighter
hain't pinched*, 'e's a heminent statesman going to luncheon
Facts in Nature
OR centuries It haa beta tamam that Nature'! most valuable health tiv-
Itw siante for the can *t disease are found In our American wrest
* Orer forty yeara age Dr.' R. V. Pieree, chief eooaulting physician to tha Invalida*
Hotel and Suiricsl toatatate st Buffalo, N.Y., aud ths powdered eitraeta sa wall I
tho lleaid axtrseU of aattve ■adleiasl ptaats, such sa Tsleodroot sad Qasoa's toot.
Uoldea Seal ud Stone root. Cherry Cork sad Mandrake, for Uw ears ef blood
diseases,  Thla prescription ** pat up in liquid torn was called
DR. PIERCE'S
Golden Medical Discovery 1
sal fcMsalojed alalia salt for all those yeara lo every iraf store in the j*S|i
land.  You caa bow obula the powdered extract in aagar-ooated tablet form of   s
(■•"•roar medicine dealer, or send 60c in aae-ceat.postan stamps^for Wai boa tf
Br. Pie™ e-a Invalids' Hotel. Buffalo. N.Y.. aad tablets will be msfled, postage prepaid.
The "Ooldoa Medical DlseevaiT" aiskes rich, ret btasJ, sarlforttesego
stomach, liver sa* aoweU sad thmgh them tb. .boh. t-yateas. Oda
^^^^WSK^s^^^U^
- >UI«3ll»*SSD*tIUV.I«»C*«Jl»AlA,**T.
tfssin inm n—******* THE ISLANDER, CUMBERLAND, B.G.
f
80*
SCRUB
inser
he Prayed Loudl
limmy were spendin;; a
i their grandmother whu
is grandmothers will.
Ihey were saying thei*.'
little Jimmy vociferated
o the Heavenly Throne
it eould be heard a Mile,
g the Divine Providence
ited fpr Christmas, and
m in the cause got on
nerves,
su praying for Christmas
loud    for?    Interrupted
,ord ain't denf.
red Jimmy, hut Grand-
ILOH
uchs,
Hies.
cures colds, and heals
28 cents.
ed Like It Anyway
Bobby at the breakfast-
JuUtis take any ot the
l:ats from the rack last
went home?
urse not, Bobby, laugh-
should he?
what I'd like to know,
cause when he went out
ay: I am going to steal
- Why, what's the mat'
Rheumatism.—A painful
form of rher.taatlsm is
urltles In '.j*. blood, the
'tlve action of the liver
• The blood becomes
■ introduction of uric
.uses much pair ln the
the joints. Pnrmelee's
i are known to havo
remarkable cures, and
strongly recommended,
hem will convince any-
alue.
ry hot da> and the fat
wanted the twelve-twen-
irough the gate at just
me. The ensuing hand-
ihej, with absoibed In-
pm tho train nnd the
m. A. its conclusion
and perspiring man,
Is way back and a va-
er cauie out to relieve
iq ilrotl. was you tryln'
Pennsylvania train?
ret lied the patient man.
■ly chasing It out of the
Control of Municipal finance
Less Powers Than English Local Government Board
In view of the fact that the Saskatchewan government bas decided to
appoint a commission to supervise
municipal finance, along the lines suggested by the Saskatchewan Rural
Municipalities Association Executive
and the Itegiua Board ot Trade, the
outline of th duties ot such a commission, as suggested by F. J. James
of the firm ot Nay & James, bond
dealers of Roglna, is particularly interesting to air municipalities. Mr.
James flrst brought the question ot tbe
advisability of appointing sucb a commission before the Regina Board of
Trade, when his Ideas were* promptly
endorsed and Bteps taken to bring the
matter to a successful conclusion.
Mr. James outlln: of the duties of
such a commission, as read before the
jReginn Board of Trade, follows:
Much has been said and a great deal
has been written In connection with
the proposal to urge one or more of
our Western Canadian Provincial Governments the advisability of exercising greater control over the borrowings of our Municipalities. Some authorities on matters ot this kind would
go so far as to recommend the appointment of a Federal Commission
with powers similar to those possessed and exercised by the Iaocal Government Board in England; but lt
must be remembered that this ls quite
a large country. Conditions ln the
various provinces are very different
and It would seem that a Commission
in a Province like Saskatchewan
would be fully employed if it were to
grapple with the problems that beset
the vast growing Municipalities In this
Province.
Widening Municipal Market
Therefore we deem it wise at thii
time to follow the ideas ot the more
cautious and offer herein for consideration of this Board some suggestions
.which may bo of.service ln solving
what Is undoubtedly a leading topic ln
the municipal debenture market and
of paramount Importance to Municipalities throughout our Province. The
main Idea would be to widen the market for Western Canadian Debentures
without unduly burdening muuicipal
bodies by Irksome restraint.
Subject a Big One
The subject is a big one and lt Is
not Intended at this time to dwell at
length upon Its many phases and possibilities, hut rather bring out a foiv
salient points which it Is hoped wlll
lead to healthy criticism and hasten
the day when the appointment of such
a commission in our Province will be
an actual fact. Just here 1 might say
that the appointment ot such a com
mission is not being suggested ln regard to Western Issue alone, but a
similar movement ls I understand being made In the other Provinces both
East and West.
We would not even suggest thc discontinuance of the Department of
Municipal Affairs, a department which
has more than justified Its existence
nnd which will undoubtedly continue
to render great service In tho building
up nnd supervision of the Rural Municipalities and Hamlots throughout the
Province. A Commission of this kind
would we think work In an entirely
different field from that of tlie Department and would have tho offect of
broadening the market for the debentures of all our Muuiclpnlllie. and give
Investors nn added feeling of confl*
dehce ln that the debentures being offered from this Province were being
issued by Municipalities under condl*
tions which fully Justified them.
Legislative Regulation not Government Guarantee
We agree with the remarks of a re*
cent writer that speaking generally
'municipal borrowing Is a matter for
legislative regulation with executive
supervision, rather than for Government aid.'
It has been sugg *te.'. that the
Government Guarantee obligations of
the Municipalities, hut there are several arguments which might be advanced
against this action, one being that Immediately the Government guaranteed
all issues the town debenture would
rank very closely, if not equal, ln value with tlie city bond, and for that
matter with the bonds of the Province
Itself, which Is decidedly unfair.
Government has Already Incurred
Heavy Guaranteeing Obligations
Again It must he borne ln mind that
our Provincial Government has already lacurred heavy liabilities In the
way of guaranteeing the bonds of railways for the building of lines where
they were much needed, tnd where
they would not likely havo been built
for many years were It not for this
Government assistance,
Under ordinary condition-* we have
a fairly good market in Canada and
the United States for the small Western Canadian Municipal debenture,
and as wo aro taking from the British
Investor about all the money he cares
to put out and these funds chiefly to
finance the cities and Provinces of our
Dominion, It would not bo wise to
strain our credit further In that direction, but rather teek to widen our field
cently taken place in Ottawa at the
conference of the Premiers of Canada's nine provinces, hiving for Its
object the de Ire to further the movement to have the Canadian Provincial
bonds placed on the British trustee
list. This would enable English trust*
ees and estate managers to Invest ln
these securities. Much has been done
by Individual cabinet ministers and
others during the past ten years to
bring this about, and high hopes are
entertained that this valuable market
may be throw,i open to cur Provincial
securities. We believo o* own Provincial Premier, tl.e Honorable Walter
Scott, has given considerable thought
to this* subject.
(To be Continued)
He Learned How It Was Done
Elihu Root tells a stor.. about himself and his efforts to correct the
manners of his office boy. Ono morning thc young autocrat came into the
office, and, tossing his cap at a hook,
exclaimed:
Say, Mrs. Root, Caere's n ball game
down at the park today nd 1 want to
go down.
Now thc great lawyer was willing
that the boy should go but thought he
would teach him a little lesson ln
good manners.
James, he said, that Isn't the way
to ask a favor. Now you sit down ln
my chair and I will show you how
to do lt properly.
The boy took the office chair and
his employer picked up his cap and
stepped outside. He then opened the
door Boftly, and holding tho cap in his
hand, said quietly to the '.mall boy
In the chair:
Please sir, there ls a ball game at
the park today; If you can sparo me I
would like to get away f- • tbo afternoon.
In. a Cash the hoy responded:
Why, certainly, Jlmmle; and here
Is fifty cents to pay your way iu.
Good-Bye, Old Backache
Nerviline Will fix You!
The Horso Wanted to be Sure
A traveller noticed that a farmer
was having trouble with his horse. It
would start, go slowly for a short distance, and then stop again. Thereupon Ihe farmer would have great
difficulty In getting it started. Finally
the traveller approached and asked
EOllclttously:   Is your  horso sick?
Not as I knows of.
Is he balky;
No. But he ls bo danged afraid I
will say whoa, and he won't hoar me.
that he stops every once in a whllo
to listen.
He Got the Dog
Walking down . ie street one day a
minister encountered a group of boys
who appeared to be arguing about a
dog that one of them was holding.
He asked what was the matter.
One ot the group replied that the
fellow who told the biggest lie, wns to
have the dog, but they coinau't de-
cltle who had told the biggest lie.
My dear boys, spoke tho miuister
gravely, don't you know .'t is very
wrong to tell lies? Why when I was
a hoy I never told a He.
Here, take the dog, 'said the boy who
was holding it.
Stiffness is Rubbed Right Out; Every
Sign of Pain Disappears
Gee whiz—thin:, of lt!
No more stomach dosing necessary
to cure your lame back.
Every trace of lameness, every bit
of stiffness, ever; sign ot weakness in
the back's muscles can be rubbed away
for all time to come by good old
"Nerviline."
No other liniment can do the work
bo quickly, can penetrate so deeply,
can bring case and comfort to the
back-weary sufferer as Nerviline Invariably does.
Backache isn't the only malady Nerviline Is quick to cure. For lumbago
or sciatica you would go far to find
relief so Bpeedy as Nerviline elves.
For chronic rheumatism thero nro
pain-destroying properties In Nerviline thnt give lt first rank. The way
It limbers up a stiff Joint and lakes
soreness out of strained or rheumatic muscles is simply a wonder.
If you have an ache or n pain anv
where, If you have a Bore back, a
stiff neck, a stiff joint, a strained muscle—if you hnve lumbago, congested
chest or sore throat, just try Nerviline.
Rub It on plentifully—lt won't blister,
it can't do anything but cure you
quickly. The large 50c. family size
bottle Is the most economical, of
course, but you can, from any dealer,
also get the 25c. small size of Nerviline, the king of all iialn-relleving re-
mi lies.
His Version
Some country youths were visiting
London. They went Into tbe British
Museum and saw a mummy, over
which hung a card on which was printed 'B.C. 87.'
They vera mystified and one said:
What do you ma     of that. Sam?
Well, said Sam, I should say lt was
the number of the motor c: that killed him.
She Would Tak: It Along
The precise but somewhat broken
English ot Madame Schumann-Heine-
is one of her charms. While ln a
Western City she found herself -tn
Immediate need of toilet powder. In
her practical way jhe stepped Into a
drug storo herself to buy It.
Wlll you have it scented? inquired
the clerk.
No, I wlll take lt v!d me, crisply re-'
plied the great singer.
ett
UMDMIIMI
Constipation
Vanishes Forever
Prompt Relief— Permanent Can
CARTER'S LITTLE
LIVER PILLS never
fail.  Purely vegetable—act surely
but cently oa
the aver.
Stop after A
dinner
distress—0
cure Midi-si
gestioQ—improve the eomple.-jon* brigl'leo
the eyes. Small rill, Small Dose, Smell hie*.
Genuine aunt bear Signature
Love'   Labor Lost
Aren't you    engnged   to   one   of
the Rljiley twins?
Ho—Yes.
She1-How do you distinguish them?
He—Oh, I don't try.
It Didn't Sound Just Right
Ma, said the -ittle [iii, what does
'dd' stand for?
Doctor of Dlv'.nlty, my dear, said the
mother. Don't they teach you the
abbreviations Ir. school?*
Yes'm, but that doesn't seem to
sound right here.
Well, said the mother, with an indulgent smile, read it out loud, my
dear, nnd let us aee.
And the little one read aloud from
a paper.
The witness lieard the defendant
say: I'll make you suffer for this. I'll
be doctor of divinity if I don't.
When It's Wast   Paper
Maid—Is tills paper from Mr. Scribbler's room waste paper, mum?
Landlady—No.   He  hasn't   written
anything ou It yet,
What It Proved
A quack doctor was holding forth
about his medicines to a rural audience.
Yes, gentlemen, he said, I have sold
theso pills for over twenty-live years
and never heard a word of complaint.
Now what does that prove?
From a voice In the crcwd camo:
That dead men tell no taleB.
Not so Quickly as T.iat
During a lecture a well-known authority on economics mentioned the
fact that In some parts thc number of
men was larger than that of women,
and he added humorously:
I can therefore recommend the lad-
Jes to emlgrato to that part of the
world.
A young lady sca'ed ln one of the
last rows got up, and fu'.l of indignation, was leaving the room rather
noisily, waereupon tho lecturer
marked:
I did not mean that it not; he done
in such a hurry as that.
They Were Accommodating
He was undeniably from fnr beyond
the suburbs, and at ho wns walking
along a city Ltreet. he stopped in front
of the flre-englue house nnd looked in.
Have many flres In this town? ho
asked.
Yes, we hove them pretty often, replied the fireman.
Ever try to see how quick you can
hitch up?
Oh, yes.
At thnt moment an alarm came In.
At the flrst stroke of the hell the men
rcshed to their posts, the doors if
the tails opened, and within a few
seconds men, horses and cart were
speeding down tho str*">t.
Thc -young man watched thc proceedings with admiral, jn. Well! he
exclaimed -.vhe. speech returned
there nin't many towns w! :re they'd
go to all that trouble to show a stranger what they can-do.
Asthma No Lonoer Dreaded. The
dread of renewed attacks from asthma
has no hold upon those whe have
learned to rely ,-pon Dr. J. D. Kellogg's Asthma Remedy. So safe do
they feel that complete r- liance ls
placed on this true specific with the
certainly that It wil! always do all that
its makers claim. If you have not yet
learned how safe you are with this
preparation at hand get It to-day and
know for yourself.
Johnny's Excuse
This note was sea . to a teacher by
a mother to e: .ilaln her 3o:*'s absence
from school:
Dear Mum: Please excuse Johnny
today. He will not he at school.- He
is acting as timekeeper for his father.
Last night you ga.e him this example.
If a field Is four miles square how
long will It take a man walking three
miles an hour to walk two and a half
times around lt? Johnny ain't no
man. so we had to send his daddy.
They left early this morning, and my
husband said they ought to be back
late tonight, though it would bo hard
going. Dear Mum, please make the
nlxt problem about ladies, as my husband can't afford to lose the day's
work'. I don't have no time to loaf,
but I can spare a day oft occasionally
better than my husband can.
Resp':  yrs.
Mrs. Jones,
*******
Wh.** He Could Do
Now, said tho physician to the distinguished poet who had summoned
him, you aro not In good shape and I
must absolutely forbid all brain work.
But, Doctor, protested the poet, may
I not writo some verses?
The doctor laughed.     Sure, he said,
write all tho verses you want to.
He Didn't Know
An Insurance agent was filling out
an application blank.
Have you ever had appendicitis? he
asked.
Well, answered the applicant, I was
operated on, but I have never fell
quite Btire whether lt wr.s appendieltle
or professional curiosity.
Minard's i.lnimcnt Ct    Limited.
Sirs,—I hav. used your MINARD'S
UNIMENT for the past 26 years and
whilst I have occaalonally used other
liniments I can safely say that I have
never used any equal to yours.
If rubbed between the hands and Inhaled frequently, lt wlll never fall to
cure cold In the lie: d ln twenty-four
hours.
It Is also the jes. for bruises,
sprains, etc.
"lours truly,
J. G. LESLiU
Dartmouth.
Well Timed on Both Sides
That certainly was a very fine sermon, said an enthusiastic church member who wns an ardent admirer of tho
minister. A fire sermon, and well
timed too.
Yes, answered his unadmlring neighbor, lt certainly was well timed. Fully
half of the congregation bud their
watches out.
lisle—the house being
i stranger behind per-
5 hia head over Shaw's
lid the original thing.
han<-'.:ei\chlef he wiped
■. paling and twisting
uiBly.
th an .ngry exclama-
k his head,
irdon,    snld Shaw;
mine, you know.
aw Mistook Hoses
ard Shew, tlie English _ _	
3 does the original j as iaue\\ ns possible In other direct*
erformance c' 'Caesar I *on9. We find on referring to the
Mr. Shaw and a friend Ba]ea records of the years 1910, 1911
and the early months of 1912. that
Western towns, In the flvo hundred to
one thousand clasc, were marketing
their bonds at an Interest cost of from
BU to d'/i . ^r cent. Even good Blzed
villages wore securing funds at from
5Vi to u".2 pei cent.
London Market Would Suffer Decline
The moment the Province announc-
I ed its Intention to guarante- bends of
a number of villages, towns and cities,
just eo soon would the rate current for
Provincial bands in the London market suffer a decline. The Purchaser
would havo in mind the fact that In
buying a Provincial bond he would be
buying it subject not only to the debt
of the Provincial Government proper,
ou'. the obligations of a large and increasing number of municipalities.
The bonds previously Issued by the
Government would also be affected. A
serious matter fo" the present holders.
You have doubtless read I, the Daily
N. U. 985 Press of tho discussion which has re-
s  Eye   Remedy
id, Weals, Watery Eyes
lyelids.   Doesn't Smart
Pain. DruggisUs Sell
nedy. Liquid, 25c, SOc.
lve in Aseptic Tubes,
Hooks Free by Mail.
Ior all (ne Slut s_. Car.
omsdr  Co.,  Chicago
A* Coming Rockefeller
Willie wns small, but he had learned
that big things are achieved by dealing with matters in the mass Instead
of in detail.
Now, he said to his mother, shortly
before Christmas, I've written a letter
asking for whnt I want, and I think
It covers everything.
That's good, Bald hie mother; what
did you ask for?
Two toy shops and a candy store.
Why He Wanted It Changed
During the recent session ot the legislature ot a big Western State a man
named John Cass applied for permission to change his first name. When
asked the reason tor wishing tt changed he gave the simple but convincing
answer: Why everybody calls mo
Jack.
Low Comedy
Blffstick—I couldn't make them
laugh to-night. Do you think my comedy ls over thei, heads?
Ravenyelp—No; under their feet.
Sunday School Teacher—Why was
Daniel forced to enter the lion's den?
Bright Pupil—Why, ho'd 'a' spoilt a
whole film If he didn'tl
Dr. Morse's
Indian Root Pills
exactly meet the need which to often
arises in every family for a medicine
to open up and regulate the bowels.
Wot only are they effective in all
cases of Constipation, but they help
greatly in breaking up a Cold or La
Grippe by_ cleaning out the system
anel purifying the blood. In the same
way they relieve or cure Biliousness,
Indigestion, Sick Headaches, Rheumatism and other common ailments.
In the fullest sense of the words Dr.
Morse's Indian Root Fills are       47
A Hovsohold   Remedy
An- Accomplished Cow
According to this advertisement In
a Connecticut country pnper there Is a
cow in New England which is possessed of rare accomplishments.
Wanted — A steady, respectable
young man to look after .■. garden and
caro for a cow wbo has a good voice
and Is accustomed to sing In the choir.
How He Had Been Prepared
During a revival service at a colored Baptist churcl enthusiasm and
spiritual fervor were at high tide.
Eberybody dat wants to gi to Heaven stan' up! Bl.outcd the exhorter.
Willi ono accord every negro In the
church except one leaped to his feet
The preacher slnaleil out the recalcitrant for spiritual admonition.
Iaookn lieah, he began, does Ah un-
derstan' dat you wants to go to Hell?
No, sah, explained tho backslider;
but Ah done been baptized in de Me-
fodls church.
Lan' sakes, man, corrected the minister, you ain't been baptized; youse
jes' been dry-cleaned.
How She Managed
Ma, said little Ethel sleepily at two
o'clock ou a cold morning, I want a
drink.
Hush darll* g. said her mother, turn
over and go to sleep.
But I want a drink.
No, y-iu are only restless,.' Turn
over, dear, and go to sleep.
Silence for live minutes. Then:
Ma, 1 want a Ji ink-
No, you don't want a drink. You
had one just before you wont to bed.
1 want a drink.
Lie still, Ethel, and go to sleep.
But I want n drink.
Don't let me speak to you again.
Two minutes of silence.
Ma, I want a drlhit.
It you say another word I will get
up and spank you.       «
Ma, when you get up to spank me
will you got me a drink?
She got :'io drink then.
His One Ambition
I hear, Mr. Wilson, said a lady at
dinner to-Francis Wilson, the actor,
that yot. are a man full of ambitions?
Ambition. Madam, Bald th'c bored
comedian.   One nibltlon.
Yes? gurgled the lady In
Oh, do tell me that ambition,
be something ;. lendld.
It ls, Madai.i. said Wilson.
rnpture.
It must
I want
to throw au egg Into an electric fan.
Hen—Landsakes, Mnrlnr, take that
benzine can away from the fire.
Marlar—What's the matter, Hon?
Getting superstlt'ous?
Giving Him Practice
Thank you. ma'am, said the old man
to his little grundduughter, who bad
brought him his slippers.     Or rather,
he continued, think you, Miss,
are not a ma'am..
No, Grandpa, replied tlio six-year
old; but f expect to be some dny, and
you might as well get used to saying
lt.
How Mark Twain Proved It   .N
When Mark Twain was living In
Hartford, Connecticut, where Dr.
Doans, now Bishop cf Albany, was rector of an Episcopal church, ho went
to hear One of the clorgyman's best
sermons. After It was over Mark
approached tho Doctor aud said polltO'
ly:
I have enjoyed your sermon this
morning. I welcomed lt us I would
an old friend. I have a book at home
in my library that contains every
word of It.
Why, lhat can't he, Mr. Clemens,
replied the rector.
All tho same. It Is so, call" Twain.
Well, I certainly Ehou.il like to r*>a
that hook, rejoined tho rector with
dignity.
All right replied Mark; you shall
have it. and tho next morning Doctor
Doano received wltl. Mark Twain's
compliments a dictionary.
A Son Spot With Hirr
The toucher v/ns addressing his pupils on tho subjocti of laziness aud
idleness.
Ho d.*ew a terrible picture of the
habitual loafer—the man who dislikes',1'11' •*$*'•    rover cooked anything te
Why He Wouldn't Say It
The president of a small college
was visiting the little town that had
been his former home ond had been
asked to address fn audience of hie
forme;* neighbors. In order to assure them that hit career had not
caused him to put on airs he began to
address them thus*
My dear friends—I won't call you
ladles and gentlemer.—I kuow you to*
well to fay that.
DISSATISFIED
WITH ILL-HEALTH
Are you satisfied to drag out an
existence, chronically ailing, and
more or less disabled by headache,
1 itaahe, aching limbs and b y
pains—all t..e result of constipated
bowels and derangements of the kidneys?       .:
•You may be disheartened and de-
pressed and possibly have been discouraged ky the treatments you have
tried. Possibly sickness has become
more or less af a aablt with you. Anyway, there Is new hope for you in Dr.
Chns-'B Kldney-Llver Pills. No other
meillcico has the combined l-fluence
on tho liver, kidneys nnd bowels that
is exerted by this greni dls
the famous Receipt Book author.
The cost ls trifling, for Dr. Chase't
Kidney Liver Pills sell at 25 centa
a box. . Many t* usandB havo begun
this treatment In skepticism, only to
bo cured by Its use. Your experience may be just as satisfactory. It
won't cost much to nuke the test, and
• ou have e* .<rythlng to gain. Isn't It
worth while to be weii anil to know
agaiu the joy of healthful living?
Sam.* Experlencs
Mrs. Newly ed (to cook, whom she
has just engaged)**— You s.o, my husband Is so very particular about hie
food.
Jook (sympathetica.:y)— They aro
all ..like, mum.    My old man was jest
to work and wh- begs for ill ho gets
Now, John, 'said the teacher to a
little boy who had been very Inattentive during the lesson.
John was Instantly on the alert.
Tell me, continued the teacher, who
Is the miserable Individual who gets
clothes, food aud lodging, and yet
does nothing in return?
John's face bright ned.
Please, sir, said ue, tho baby.
An Intelligent Frenchman v.as studying tho English language. When I
discovered that if I wus qu'ek I was
fast, snld he, and that If I was tlcii I
was faBt, If I spent too freely I was
fast, and that not to eat wa 1 to fast, f
was discouraged. But when I came
across the sentence: the flrst ono won
one guinea prize, I was tempted to
give up trying to learn English.
pleuso 'im In me llfo.
Good actions tarry their warrant
With them. The warrant for bad onee
ls carried by a policeman.
What He Wanted to Know
Miss Gibson was very rli .1 and Mr,
Ilnnna waft very poor. She liked
him, but that \ *.s all, and lie waB well
aware of the fact. One evening ho
grow somewhat tender nnd at last ho
said: You are very rich, aren't yoa,
Helen?
Yes, Tom, replied the girl frankiyi
I am worth abou  twa millions.
I knew you wouldn't.
Will you marry me, Helen.
Oh, no, Tom, I couldn't.
Then why did you nsk me?
Oh, I just wanted to sei how a man
feels when he loses two million.
IF HEAD ACHES AND YOUR EARS BUZZ
YOU SURELY HAVE CATARRH
It doesn't matter how lo ig you havo
suffered, or how often you have failed
to get relief—even though Catarrh may
affect every organ In ,,onr body, you
can be permanently cured by Inhaling
the soothing vapor of Catarrhozone.
A few breaths irough Catarrhozone
inhaler clears tho phlegm out of tho
throat and stops your cough The nostrils are cleansed of offenilve mucous
discharge, and sneezing and sniffling
You stop at once. Partial loss ot hearing
and headache (very common symptoms of catarrh) aro qutokl*) cured,
and In a Bbort tlmo every trace of
catarrh disappears.
Nothing cau be    simple-   or   more
pleasant than Catarrhozone. It's healing plney 'apor '.ends a warm cleans.
lug sensation th.ough all the air passages In the head and throat—make*
you feel better In half a minute.
"My cars buzzed by the hour and 1
had frightful .ac noises," writes J.
P. Purdy, from Port Ilu-on. "Catanrb
fairly filled my whole head and throat
I got relief mighty fast when I trio*
Catarrhozone; It ha. the spot Instant*
ly. You bet C.'.tr.rliozone has cured
me and I stfiiply swear hy 11."
Get tho corn-net 51*00 outfit; It doeo
tho trick ln a bury—never falls*
small slzo SOc; trial or sample sloe
25c, sold by dealers everywhere. mi. iMaAiMigH, timiMiUMi, n.''
sslsatB
THE ISLANDER
Published every Saturday at Cumberland, Vancouver Island, B.C., by
THE BUNDER PRINTING AND PUBLISHING COMPANY
Edward W. Bickle, Edit***.-*,
Subscriptien: $1.50, payable in advance.   Advertising Rates furnished on application
To Correspondents: Tbe Editor does not hold himself responsible for views
expressed by correspondents. No letters will be published in the Islander
except over the writer's signature.   The Editor reserves the right to
refuse publication of any letter.
SATURDAY, MARCH 14, 1914.
Cheap Wit.
"Cumberland must have some ambitious citizens within
her borders with the political bee in their bonnets. The
following is from the News of that place: "If it costs between
two and three hundred dollars to become president of a
Conservative Association, how much will it cost to be elected
to the provincial legislature? In our-opinion, it will take
one month's output of a distillery and brewery, the farm, and
all the money the wife has in the ' long stocking,' and
perhaps get badly left in the end. But, politicians will
sacrifice a lot for the good of the people (?)"—Courtenay
Review, 5th March, 1914.
We desire to most emphatically deny the correctness of
the assumption made by the " Review." While it is quite
true that the excerpt printed by the " Review" originated
from the "News" office in this town, we have every
reason to believe that the innuendo contained in the "News"
paragraph was aimed at a certain aspirant for political
honours residing in the Courtenay Valley and prominently
identified with a certain faction of the Conservative party at
Courtenay. There are three Conservative Associations in
this district, namely at Cumberland, West Cumberland and
Bevan, of which the presidents are W. Wesley Willard, J.P.;
John Gillespie and Thomas Spruston respectively; we
challenge either the "News" or the " Review" to come out
openly and say that the paragraph quoted has reference to
either of these gentlemen.
Daughters of Eve.
Perhaps one of the most outstanding features of the
present age is the affectation of our women-folk and their
idolatory of freakish fashions. Never before has so much
eccentric attention been paid to attire, make-up and manner
by women of all ages. Exchanges on our desk provide us
with numerous comments, criticisms and satires and at the
risk of being termed ungallant we will reproduce a few of
them. Says one:
" Women at all times have been more or less eccentric
in their fashions, following the changing edicts of those who
make it a business to enforce one mode after another; but
a scanning of all the varied and amusing notions as to dress
put into practice for centuries, as the archives of history and
fashion preserve them, will fail to reveal anything more
grotesque than the present fashions disclose when associated
with the hobbled, hopping walk, the contorted carriage and
lhe impression that some of the young creatures impart that
that they will break into the tango in just a moment."
Another critic informs us that the fashionable women
of to-day "walk in a debile sort of way, oscillating on
extremely high heels, their short steps punctuated by
stumbling. The shoulders are convex, the necks bend, the
chests sink and the waists extend forward."
Another writer in a contemporary directs his satire
against the hobble skirt in the following verses:
She found a pair of bloomers which her mother used to wear.
"Ah, ha!" she cried. "Here's something rich! I'm lucky, I declare!"
She took* them to her tailor, who soon ripped the legs apart
And riiade the peach a skirt from each to justify his art.
Of course after all we are only one of those ignorant
creatures a " mere man " and therefore cannot be expected
to know much regarding these matters.'yet nevertheless the
following argument appears to be well founded:
"If we are going to stand for women folks wearing
shadow skirts and slit skirts and transparent skirts, and our
younger women learning to dance the boll weevil wiggle,
the Texas Tommy Tango, the bunny hug, the bear dance,
the half centre, the buzzard flop and the puppy huddle, and
so on down the line, then the men folks might just as well
have their saloons and the whole push go to hell together."
Resist.
The man who is likely to catch cold is the man who
wraps himself up. So the man who is always shielding
himself from the hard and trying experience is the man who
preserves his weak spot. The man who refuses gymnastic
exercises has flabby muscles; it is exercise which makes
him " hard as nails." So does a man become hard when he
exercises the will to resist, to suffer, to bear, to endure.
Don't always be cosying yourself. Live out in the open.
Live among the winds and risks of life. Venture among
the perils and hazards of life. When trial or sorrow or disappointment come to you, don't run indoors, but meet them;
bear your breast to them, oppose them, put up your will
against them. All this will tend to elicit that which is rocklike in you. If you fall, get up again. If you are defeated
don't admit a final failure. If you don't succeed, try again.
Keep the will athletic. Be .severe with yourself. Don't
indulge yourself. Sometimes put hard things upon yourself
for the sake of the discipline.
i
Macfarlane Bros.
I
Limited
" The Square Dealing House "
Eastern Suits to Order
from
$15.00
to $25.00.
WHY PAY MORE
These prices are 20 per cent, lower
than any house in Cumberland.
200 Samples to select from.
Fit Guaranteed.
P. DUNNE, ffiJlANT
THE CANADIAN BANK
OF COMMERCE
SIR EDMUND WALKER, C.V.O., LL.D., D.C.L., Frealdent
ALEXANDER LAIRD JOHN AIRD
General Manager Aaalatant General Manager
CAPITAL, $15,000,000 REST, $12,500,000
SAVINGS BANK ACCOUNTS
Interest at the current rate is allowed on alt deposits of $1 and
upwards. Careful attention is given to every account Small accounts
are welcomed.    Accounts may be opened and operated by mail.
Accounts may be opened in tlie names of two or more persons,
withdrawals to be made by any one of them or by the survivor. s,
CUMBERLAND BRANCH.      W. T.  WHITE, Manager.
International Mercantile Marine
Lines
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New Suit
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Custom
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4
Order your new spring suit now and
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f We have also a complete range of
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il
See our Spiring Hats for
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♦
♦
"The Comer Store," Cumberland, B.C.
Phono 10 P.O. Box 100
•,^*J«.';V'    ,'.' ■
The Shortest Route
to Europe
For Particulars of Fares, etc., apply to
E. W, BICKLE,
Steamship Passenger Agent, Cumberland, B.C.
Moving Pictures!
Crown Theatre, Cumberland
Opera House, Courtenay
New Hall, Bevan
Moving Pictures will be shown in the above as follows—
Every Evening Except Thursday, Cumberland
Monday, Wednesday and Saturday, Courtenay
Thursday, Bevan.
TWO SHOWS EACH NIGHT. PRICES AS USUAL |
W. W1TCHELL, Manager. f?
■riir mtisin*, ni»fmi**.***, n.c.
j .
The Popular Beer
of the day is
The
Silver Spring
and now on draught at the
NewEngland Hotel
JOSEPH WALKER  Proprietor.
Lununuir Avenue
Cumberland
 BlO|
Try it and be convinced, you will drink no other.
1 ***** ■
Awarded Four Gold Medals B. C, Agricultural Association 1910 & 1918
r ■£• '•      for Purity and Quality.
For Sale in Bottles at all Leading Hotels,
Silver Spring Brewery Ltd,
Synopili ol Coil Mining Regulations
COALoiiningiighta of the Dominion
in Manitoba, Saskatchewan and Albert*,
the Yukon Territory, the Norths, eat Terri
toriea and iu * portion of the Province of
British Columbia, may be leased for a term
•>f t*enty-une yeara tt an annual rental of
11 an acre. Nut more than 2,600aorea
will be learned to one applicant.
Application fnr a leaae muat be mado by
the applicant in perann to the A gent or aub
Agent of the diatrict iu which the riglita
applied for aro aitualed.
Iu surveyed territory tho land muat be
described by aeotiona.or legal subdivisions
of sections, and in unauiveyed territory
the trace applied for ahall be ataked uut by
theapplicaut himself.
fisch applioation muat be accompanied
by.a fee of 16 which will be refunded if the
rinhts applied forare not available, but not
otherwise. A royalty ahall be paid on the
merchantable output of tho mine at the
rate of live cenU per ton.
The person operating the mine shall
furnish the Agent with sworn returns ac
counting for the full quantity of merchantable coal rained and pay the royalty
thereon. If the coal niiniag rights are
not being operated, auch returns shall be
furnished at toast onoa a yoar.
The lease will include the coal mining
rights only, but thei* stee may be permitted to puiohaao whatever available aur
face rights may bo considered necessary
forthe working of the mine at thereto of
flO.OOaneore.
For full information applicatiun should
be made to tho Secretary of the Department of the Inteiior, Ottawa, or to  any
Agent or 8ub Asrnt ofDnminion Landa.
~     W. w. CORY,
Deputy Minister of ihelnterinr.
N.B- Unauthorized publication of this
advertlM-ment will not in paid for.
WOOD for SALE
aU>PLY
Thomas Pearce
Happy Valley
PHONEL86
E. L SAUNDERS
PRACTICAL BOOT AND
SHOE MAKER
Orders Receive Prompt Attention
Repairing a Specialty
West Cumberland
The Ideal Store
NEW SHOES
The first shipment of our spring stock
of shoes have arrived in
Men's Tan and Black Button
Ladies Tan, Gun Metal, and
Navy Blue Suede in
Lace & Button
Watch for our Sale of Odds and Ends
after Stock-Taking.
The Ideal Store
Next door to Tarbells.
i
UNION   BAY
I'he Wise Real Estate Specialist looks
to the centre where transportation
facilities abound.
5 to 20 Acre Blocks, adjoining
the townsite
$100 an Acre
Easy Terms.
No better proof tbat what we offer is all right tban is tbe fact
that all the buyer* so far are men who have lived at Union
Bay for years, who intend making their home with a good
living in Fruit, Vegetables and Poultry.
Ring up
British Columbia Investments Ltd.
HARRY IDIENS, Manager
PHONE 36. COUBTENAY
Buy yourself a Home near
No. 8 MINE
BEST ON  VANCOUVER  ISLAND
Blocks, from one acre to eight acres,
$200 per acre and upwards
Finest Homesites in Comox District
FOR PARTICULARS APPLY TO
jfbrd
It's the Ford age—the age of
dependable and economical transportation. More than fotir hundred
twenty thousand Fords in worldwide service have changed distance
from a matter of miles to a matter of
minutes.    Buy your Ford today.
Six hundred dollars is the new price of the Ford
runabout: the touring car is six fifty; the town car
nine hundred—all f.o.b. Ford, Ontario (formerly
Walkerville post office),complcte witbequipment.
Get catalog and particular's from E. C. Emde,
sole agent for Comox District, Cumberland, B.C.
French Millinery
Mrs. John Gillespie
Union Street
Cumberland,!!}. C.
Capital I»ald Up 111,560,000
RoMi-ve Fund <tl3,000,000
THE ROYAL BANK
OF eANADA
Drafts iuued in any currency, payable all over the world
SPSCIAL ATTENTION paid to SAVINGS ACCOUNTS and Interest at highest current rates allowed on deposits of »1 and upwards.
CUMBERLAND, B.C.,Branch     - -    OPEN DAILY
UNION WHARE, Sab-Branch, OPEN TUESDAYS AND FRIDAYS
D. M. MOBBISON, Manager.
COURTENAY, B. O, Branoh, OPEN DAILY.
R. H. HARDWICKE, Manager.
NEW GOODS
NEW STOCK OF
LINOaLEUM and
WALLPAPERS
1914 Patterns just opened out.
A full line of Furniture, House Furnishings, Beds
and Bedding, Stoves and Ranges always on hand
DUNSMUIR AVENUE
CUMBERLAND, B. C.
Phone ia)
SMMMinaia
A. McKlNNON
THE FURNITURE STORE
Pendants, Necklaces
Watches
MAGAZINES W ALL THE LATEST BOOKS
T. D. McLEAN
THE   LEADING    JEWELER
Cumberland. B. C.
HOTEL UNION
OPPOSITE  RAILWAY STATION
First CUss in every respect. Perfect Cuisine
Headquarters for Tourists and Sportsmen
Wines Liquors and Cigars
John N. McLeod, Proprietor
When In CiHiilH-iliiii'i ni.'il,-' tin- ITiilon yiMirlii-a't'iiuirtcrx
MarocchiBros
__..__________
Agents for Pilsener Beer
GEORGE K0N0
REAL  ESTATE
HEAD OFFICE: 627 Pandora Street, Victoria, B.C.
BRANCH OFFICE, P.O. Box, 434, Cumberland, B.C.
Contracting, etc.. Land Clearing, Sawmill Labor Supplied, Logging Camp,
Railway and General Contractor. THE ISLANDER, CUMBERLAND, B.C
DON'T HAVE RHEUMATISM
Get Gin Pllla Now
and be tree ot pal. all winter. Mr.
Robert Wil* on o- Hardfield. N.B., says
"It affords me great pleasure to convey, not only to you bu. also to all
sufferers from Backache and Rheumatism, the great relief I have obtained
from '.he use of Gin Pills. I feel thankful to jou. I recommend GIN PILLS
to anyone suffering as I did."
60c. a Box. 0 for $2.50. Sample free
if you write National Drug & Chemical Co. of Canada. Limited, Toronto.
CJLWWS
WEST-RN CANADA
KST WD HfM.rH TO Mtm Mt 6H1B.
Mis, Wiuauiw'e Sooi-niNr, tirnrr has been
»^icro«t SIXTY ifEARSby MILLIONS of
MOTHERS lot their CHI LURE N WBII9C
-BBKtHINO, wltll PHUPI.CT SUCCESS. K
■OOTIIHS lho CHILD. SOt'TKNS the GUMS,
#JL!,.v*»aU VMDi \ CURES wind COLIC, anct
ii tiie beat remedy lot .OIAHRHQ.A. U is ab-
■■Tutetv harmless. lie sure am' ask :oi 'Mrs.
Wi ni-lew's Soothing Syrup," and taJtc ao otrtt
kiuL  '1'weuty-iivc cent* a bottle.
RAW FURS
We fay Highest Values
Write for Price ListOI
and ShippingTa«J*   ,
5Aerc€TurCij..ltd
SKinfend Alexsnder.VimiWj. Canada
We also buy hides and sc-tiica root
w
sia-mratKOMiiaMiDv. ri.itt.aiur.
ERAPION°* "■*•*
!  Ho-rpiUli *
_k till. I1DNKT. »LADDER. DISEASES. BLOOD POISOM,
§«.**. 1ITMBI Ho. OBUfi-JtStSOrUAILll. POST 4 CT*
fOUGBRA Cg. M. lEEKMAN ST. NBW VOIKQr LIHAlt ■«**•
tOBCSTO.    WB1 TB FOR FREE BOOX TO Dm LB CLlM
Hid.Co, iiavbksidck Rd. iiAMpsriaAo. London. turn.
"  "   "'" '"lllMOf   BASY 10 TUI
BATS ARO
  _ LUTINOetM.
BIB THAT TltADI  UARXBD WORD    THB1AP10K    II Ol
Mur- aovr.rr.uif uiuud to UA auiuuiiracnm
■ID. CO. IIAVIRSTOCXKD. HAMP9TBAD.
MY NEW DRAGS! ITASTEI.RSS) PO-ftUOt
THERAPION
PALMISTRY
Tour I.ife'3 tn Tour Hand! Read
Tour Own Future! Bend Posti.' Note Hli
cents and .stumped addressed envelope
to Crescontla, the well known acientl-
flc palmist who will mall you chart
from which ynu ein rend your own future. It will fully describe your past
and future, life and It can be a constant
guide In life. IRbtSCENl'IA, 8, Stobart
Block, Winnipeg.
Did She See?
A woman was discussing the English language with Rudyart. Kipling.
Don't you think it strar Je, Mr. Kipling, said tho woman with superior
wisdom, that "ttgar ls the only word
tn the English language where an 's'
and 'u' come together and are pronounced 'sh,'
Mr. Kipling's eyes twtuUed ub ho
answered*.  Sure.
They Misunderstood
A man who did not articulate very
clearly wns proccnt on the first night
of a very badly written and worse-acted play. A numbor of friends present
who were full of compassion, applauded at the end of the play and the man
of deficient articulation was heard to
call for the author, who ca~ie out to
bow his thanks.
What in the world did you yell fnr
the author for? asked a friend of the
man.
I didn't. Tou misunderstood. I
was yelling for other,
Wise mothers who know the virtues of Mother Graves' Worm Exterminator always have It at hand, because '.t proves its value.
Every Moment Counted
Ellhu Uoot was cross-examining a
young woman in court one day.
How old aro you? he asked.
The young woman hesitated.
Don't hesitate, said Mr. Root. The
anger you hesitate Hie older you are.
Welded
Boob-
-Weak
things u
nited
becomo
strong.
Miss Tarte—
Why don'
a you
marry ?
•"DODD'S-  /
KIDNEYS
7   PILLS ,
./.•'H. ur*   ATl-fAV\:
He. • box et* em boxes for $2.50
It all dealt-*, er The Dodds Medicine Company, Limited Toronto,
Canada.	
,-*
W. N. U. 985
Is the   Country   That   Haa   all   tie
Winners
'It's hurrah for J. D. McGregor and
little old Manitoba. The agricultural Collese toys r. at this moment
yelling their heads off .u the big
arena, antl every Western Canadian
is shaking hands with every eastern
Canadian. For J. D. McGregor of
Brandon has pulled oft the grand
championship of the International
Llvj Stock Show at Chicago, the biggest show of its kind on earth.'
This was the news thot flashed along
the Associated Frei*s wires on Oecem-
her 2nd, under a Chicago date-line;
and not only those who wero right
thoro at tho show itself, but Canadians in all parts ot the world read
this dispatch with rride, and satisfaction. For while tha International
Live Stock Show at Chicago is perhaps thn biggest show of Its kind on
earth, tho gland champic.shlp in the
steer class is undoubtedly the blue
ribbon event in fat cattle of this continent. Once moro Canada had been
successful, and thc steer 'Glrncarnock
Victor II, which had downed all comers had once agair. demonstrated
Canada's supr ni.-.cy in nil agricultural products. At grain shows, Canada is now so much thc acknowledged
victor that prizes are tacitly hers he-
fore the actual judging begins; but
that she should so naturally tako the
lead in live stock events will act only
ti'slsnother Incentive to renewed faitli
in the future of Western Canada.
The tact that Mr. McGregor should
take this prize is notable in that it is
thc second time in succession that he
has won it. Last year, wllh Glen-
carnock Victor, he wc*. adjudged winner; now this year with Glencarnocli
Victor II he repeats his success It ls
the third time the championship has
come to Canada. Glencarnock Victor II was adjudged first tn his class
as a grade yearling, then champion ot
all yearlings, and finally grand champion over all pure breds and grades,
He had been tod on nothing that cannot be grown or. any western farm—to
wit, bailey, and oat chop, turnips, oat
sheaves, prairie hay, aud a very little
linseed meal. He would not know
corn if he met it. The greatest triumph ot all is that he was fed by a
boy not yet seventeen who had cared
for him sineo a calf.
Nor was this tlie only prize that fell
to Western Canada. A very fine
Bhowlng of horses was made by the
province ot Saskatchewan who won
three firsts, seven seconds, two thirds
and five other prizes, certainly not a
bad showing for the first timo ot exhibition at this shew! Glencarnock
Victor II will not, ns his namesake, he
slaughtered immediately, but will be
taken on show, antl n long itinerary
has been mapped out through Ontario, Manitoba, Alberta, Saskatchewan
and lowa. Glencarnock Vi.tor 1,
dressed • t the highest percentage of
anv champion fo. thirteen years, namely 70.7 per cent, and he was sold on
the hoot .at the special price of 50c.
per lb.
All the wi.aiiers, somehow, seem to
como from Western Cannda nowa
days. It was only the other day
that the province ot Saskatchewan,
with Its consolidated exhibit, praetl*
cally swept the hoard at the International Dry Farming Congress, which
was held thin year at Tulsa, Okla.
The premier prize of this congress, the
sweepstakes prize for the best peck
of wheat, represented by .a Rumley
separator valued at -$1,250. was won
by Paul Gerlach ot Allan. Sask. In
addition to tills, Saskatchewan farmers cu.itured the sweepstakes prizes
for tho best *heaf of rirrley. the best
bushel and sheaf of oats, nnd the best
peck of flax in competitions open all
of them to the world Altogether,
Saskatchewan tool; five lirst prizes f.ir
wheat, threo firsts for oals. two firsis
for barley, and. two firsts for flax;
while tho province of Alberta took the
sweepstake prize for thc best peck ot
barley. Th* Lest and second best
collectively exhibits by any farm wo-
man'r club were won respectively by
the Home Makers Club of Bladworth.
Sask.. antl the Homo Makers Club ot
Areola, Sask.
A great amour, of space would br
required to rnumerate fully all the
successes ot WeBtern Canad, in the
exhibition hali within the last year or
two. This success at Tuls*. is only
repeating tho result last yenr'j International Dry Farming Congress,
held then at Lethbrldge,, Alta. On
that occasion tlie prize tor tlie best
bushel of hard wheat was won by
Henry Holmes of Raymond, Alta, who
was awarded a $2,500 steam tractor;
Western Canada competitors carried
off h"tore thorn twelve out cf eighteen
porsihle sweepstake prizes, 8'J out of
152 possible llrsts, 61 out of 88 possi
hlo second-, and 40 out ot 51 possible
thirds. One ot thc most outstanding
events of the year 1312 was the worldwide renown which Canada gained for
Its oats, through the winning of the
Colorado Trophy for thc best bushel
ol cats shown at tho National Com
Exposition at Columbia. B.C., by J. C.
Hill and Sons of Lloydmlnsior, Sash.
This prize, a silver ciip valued at
$1,000 was open t3 the North American continent, and was very keenly
contested. Tho Hills Uso won the
$1000 •rl'.o tor the best bushel of oats
at the Columbus, Ohio, Corn Show the
previous yenr. Tht family belonged
I originally to the Ua.*r Colony, and
[came from London only ten years ago.
land had then no knowledge at all ot
1 farming.
I- Thc 1011 American Land and irrl*
I gatlon Exposition at New York is his-
' toric In the anna's of Cancdian Wheat,
for was not tl o $1,000 In gold donated by Sir ThomaB Shaughnessy for th-i
best exhibit of hard red mtlllmj wheat,
In a competition open to botli Americas won by Seager Wheeler of Rost*
horn, Saskatchewan? And not only
that, hut Alberta and Manitoba farmers were placed respectively second
and third. At tho same show, the
$1.0110 silver championship trophy pro-
scntotl by A. E. Suilwell, President rf
Ithc K.C." nd O.R. for tbe best exhibit of late commercial or marketable
| potatoes grown in the two AmerlcaB
was won by the Provlnco of British
Columbia. At the 1912 Bhow, the
Canadian Pacific Railway were awarded a magnificent sterling silver cup for
their exhibit, ahe wnrdln- accompany-
afc
*»."Hi?-*'*
are anrmttd fcrinf
climatic change., because tie impure Iked
u incapable ti resistance
ud ordinary treatment
teemi oseleji—but the
fame of Scott's Emulaion
for relieving rheumatism is
based on logical principles
and scientific facts. This
oil-food promptly makes
active, red, life-sustaining
blood corpuscles and its
body-building properties
regulate the functions to
expel poisonous acids.
Scott's Emulsion, with careful
diet (or one month, will relieve
the lame muscles and stiffened
joints and subdue the unbearable sharp pains when other
remedies fail.
Beware of alcoholic imitation*
aad insist on the purity af SCOTTS.
»T ALL onUOOISTS        »-**»
Two Reasons for Not Reporting
General Nelson A. Miles, during act-
Ue service, one day received a telegram from a subordinate Wo was on
a furlough but was expected back that
day.     The dispatch read:
Sorry, but cannot report today na -
expected, owing to unavoidable clrcum-
Btances.
The tone if the message did not
please the General, aui he wired back:
Report at once, or give reasons.
Back came the answer trom a hos-i
pltal:
w       V/A^/fril*   0*9        *#L*1e4e*tr&    '^U*\^*\*
~*tZl<r-t*tu*Utf ~*te *fn.**Jk, **>4re4 e+*r-**t
Train oft, can", ride;
walk.
legs oft. can't
ing which stated that the exhibit was
'the finest display of grain ever made
in America.' In the past, tlio Canadian Pacific Railway have also won
othci prizes at those bis shows: for instance at tho Alask.'-Yukon Pacific Exposition at Seattle, at the Lewis and
Clark Centennial Exposl lon . * Portland, Ore., ar.d at various European
expositions, such as those at Brussels,
London*; Glasgow and Vienna.
The list of prizes won by British
Columbia apples would make a long
tale. A8 i vulo, the British Columbia Government undertakes the matter ot preparing and consolidating the
Individual collections from various dls-
trictt, and the result is a splendid
collection that gains premier honors
wherever shown. The Provlnco won
the sliver trophy cup, valued nt $400,
donated by the Minister ot Agriculture
for Manitoba, for the bolt state or
provincial display of boxed fruit, at thc
1912 Dry Fanning Congress at Leth*
bridge, and has twice been rwarded
the gold medal of the Toronto National Exhibition. On the other side of
the Atlantic Jccan, B.C. apples have
been exceedingly successful. At tlu
Royal Horticultural Society's Exhibition, namely 1904,1905.1909,1910. and
1912. and at practically every exhibition Individual exhibitors wero awarded silver medals, etc. In 1910 a unique
distinction was conferred, in the shape
ot the large gold Hogg Memorial medal, which had over been struck by
the Royal Horticultural Society before, and* Is only awarded for exhibits
of superlative merit. British Columbia apples have also won gold and silver medals at the ' oyal Horticultural
Society of Scotland's exhibition and at
many provincial shows in Great Britain.
Tbe One Who Did the Best Job
A certain careless student ln a
small college Buffered froj obesity,
and it app ars that even college pro*
fessoi ■■ do not love a fat man. One
day, after a particularly unsuccessful
recitation tn mathematics, the Instructor said scornfully: Well, Mr. Blank,
you are better fed than taught.
That's right, ProfesBor, r.ighed tho
youth BUbsldlng heavily Into his chair,
you teach me—* feed myself.
 t
Mlnard's Liniment Cures Distemper.
Maintaining a Microbe *
A country school-teacher was cashing her monthly check at the bank.
The teller apologized for tbe filthy
condition of tbe bills, saying: I hope
you arc not afraid ot microbes.
Not a bit of It, the school-teacher
replied, 1 am sure no microbe could
live on my salary.
Ita virtue  Cannot be  Described.—
No one can explain the BUbtle power
that Dr. Thomas' Eclectrl*. Oil pos-
ceses. The originator was himself
surprised by the wonderful qualities
that hi* compound possessed. That
he was tho bcetactor of humanity ':
shown hy tho myriads that rise In
praise ot this wonderful Oil. So familiar is everyone *ith lt that it ls
prized as a household medicine everywhere.
EDDY'S
"2 ln 1" and "3 in 1"
Washboards
a*s goat* aa
EMy'a
Matches
Ne tthtr Waahkoare-e Have Hss
slno crimped by 'ns method sacu-
llar ts SDDY'i Washboards.
Thla patented process eliminates
ths denser sf torn llnensMhs
abuee of hanae—the unplssesntness
of wash>day.
It assures t en-fart and economy ts
ths {-.rosiest degree. Insist sol
SDDVS.
Parading Her Memory
Thornton—Fannk  Flashley carries
her bank roll In her stocking.
Rosemary—I am not surprised. She
always seemed fond of daunting her
wealth.
THE HALF-SPEED
MAN AND WOMAN
"All Out
What It Means When You Feel
of Sorts"
You know wha. it means to feel "all
out of sorts." Most people have felt
this way at somo time. Nerves out
of order, Irritable, languid, depressed.
An aching head, a fagged brain, appetite bad and digestion weak. With
somo peoplo this condition comes and
goes; with others it is chronic; they
can't shake it off. It Interferes with
business, spoils recreation and robs
life of all its Joys. These men-and
women arj only able to live and work
at "half speed."
Halt speed people have lost that
abundant natural vitality which enables others to go "full-speed-ahead"
through lite. Their energy and nerve
power havo evaporated—they cannot
work long without breaking down. The
trouble Is nerve weakness and ls
caused by poor, watery blood. You
can begin to improve your condition
today by taking Dr. Williams' Pink
Pills. They make rich, rod blood once
moro pulsato through your veins, and
your nerves thrill with fresh vigor.
Ilero Is convincing evidence that new
strength and full health can be had
through the use ot Dr. Williams' Pink
Pills. Mr. Newton Mayhew, North
Tryon, P.E.I., says: "I am a farmer
anil naturally have to work very hard.
Tho result was that I found myself
very much run down. My blood became thin and watery, and my muscles
flalibv. 1 took doctors *rer.tnient but
It did not hilp me antl I grow bo weak
that I could scarcely wot.- i.t all. As
I found the n-.cdlcal treatment was not
helping mo 1 decided to try Dr. Williams' Pink Pills, and in these I tound
the medicine I needed, as ln a short
timo I was restored to my old health
and vigor. I shall always recommend
these pills to all sufferers."
Dr. Williams' Pink Pills are sold
by all medicine dealers, or will be
mailed, post palti. at SO centB a box
or six boxe„ for 52.50 by Tho Dr.
Williams' Medlclno Co., Brockville,
Ont
Ht Idea of It
George Washington, rend thc email
loy from his history, wijS born February 22, 1732, A.D.
What does A.D.' stand for? Inquired the teacher.
The small boy pondered. I don't
exactly know, he hesitate-;. After
dark, I guess.
ShilohM
tba family  remedy  for  Coughs  and Cold*
tat*!! dose.   Small bottle.   Beat since 1170.
Now She's Much Younger
Wilfred—Do you know Miss Cutey,
too?
Ernie—Yes.     We used   to   be the
same ago when we were growing up.
Has Their Number
Indignant party—Hello, Central. Can
you suggest the wrong number to ask
for in order io *.3t 6380 Franklin?
Could Think Only of One Kind
The young father was rejoicing visibly oyer the..adveu' of his first sou.
Early in the morning he was proudly
ln evidei.ee at .he front gate when the
iceman appeared.
Twenty-llvo pounds? Inquired tho
Iceman.
No, said the excited parent, eight
and three-quarters.
The Sins of Omission
Now, said the clergyman to the Sunday school class, can any of you tell
me what aro .ins of omission?
Yes, sir, sail the small boy. They
are the sins wo ought to have done
and haven't.
Why are you here, my poor friend?
asked the mlniBter who was .visiting
tho prison.
1 am the victim of the unlucky number thirteen, sir. said the prlBoner.
Indeed! How to that?
Twelve jurors am  one iudge. sir
Did you kill the moths with the
moth balls 1 recommended? oisked the
druggist.
No I didn't! said the customer truculently; I sat up all night and didn't
hit a single moth.
Bridegroom—Dldi't X look like a
fool when I was at tbe altar rail?
Best Man—No; but any ono could
B&e that you were not yourself.
FARMERS
Osn always make euro of getting tha highest prlcee far WHIAT, I
•ARLCY and FLAX, by chipping their oar lots to FORT WILLIAM
PORT ARTHUR snd having them eold on commlaalon b*
THOMPSON, SONS AND COMPANY
THS   WELL-KNOWN   FARMERS' AGENT*
ADDr.ESS 700-m Y., ORA1N  EXCHANGE, WINNIMta.
All
Henry's Whereabouts
Where ls Henry? asked 'he neighbor of the lady whose husbaujl  he
wanted to see.
1 don't know, oxactly, said the lady,
If the ice is li t..ick as Henry thinks
it is he la skating; it it is as thin aB I
think it is he is swimming.
One Way Out
Repeat tha words the defendant
used, said the lawyer for the plaintiff
ln a case of slander.
I'd rather not, said the witness timidly; they were hardly words to tell
to a gentlemav..
Ah, said tho attorney, then whisper
them to the judge.
Where the Punishment Fits the Crime
Justice David J. Brewer waB once
asked* What is the extr^mt penalty
for bigamy?
Ho smiled and answered: Two mothers-in-law.
It looked like the end or an effort in
rhyme—
He'd been stuck for an hour for a
jingle with 'month,'
Then ho slapped ln a lassio who lisped .-.11 thc time,
And he chuckled.   1'vo   beaten   N.
Webster .'or onth.
Efficiency
Our boss Is a crank on efficiency.
What's he up to r.w?
Trying to teach the stenogrnpher to
chew her gum In two movements less
per minute to the lower Jaw.
Nine Point In Her Favor
The lovely girl, havlns lingered a
minute In her room to adjust her transformation, change the angle of her
Grecian band and mako „ure that her
skirt fitted llko the peelic*; ot a plum,
descended to the pari • to find the
family pet esconceu upon tbe kneo of
the young man caller, her curly head
nestled comfortably against his shoulder.
Why, Mabei! the young lady exclaimed: aren't you ashamed of yourself?     Get right dow .
Shan', do It, retorted tho child. I
got here first.
Why He Wept
He was a hard-looklnt, ruffian, but
bis counsel, in voice husky with
emotion, addressed tbe Jury:
Gentlemen, Bald he, my client mm
driven by want of food to take ttt
f*-iH sum ot J* ey. All that ha)
wanted was sumclent ■ money to bajr
food for his little ones. Evidence et
thiSTles in the fact that he didn't take)
a pocket book, containing fifty dollars
ln bills'that was lying in the room.
The counsel pu.ao^d f a moment^
and tho silence was interrupted by a
sob of tbo prise, .er.
" ilo you weep? asked the Judge.
Because, replied the prisoner, I did
not see the pocketbook.
Mlnard's Liniment Cures Colds, Etc.
What Would Happen
Do you understand what you are bs
swear to? asked the court as a not
over-intelligent looking negro took th»
witness stand.
Yessah, Ah does. Ah'm to Bweah
to tellde trur.
Yes, Bald tbe Judge; and what will
happen If you do not tell th -. truth?
Well, "ill, was the taesitatln* answer, Ah expects ouah side'll win t*
case, sah.
So you have two ,.roposnls?
Yes; I can'* decide which to marry
first.
Honesty, like beauty, is often only
skin deep.
Na Dm Co laxatives
are especially good  tor
children because they are
pleasant to take, gentle ia
action, do not irritate the
bowels nor develop a need
tor continual or increased
doses,   use. a box, st yonr
Druggist's.
National Drag sad ttemlcal Co.
ef Canada, Umitad.     177
OVNADAP«pti»d CEMENT
SOME men ask for so many bags of
"cement"—
Others, more carefulsay they want
'Portland Cement"—
But the man who does the
best work insists upon getting "Canada" Portland
Cement—
And he looks to
/\see that every \
bag bears this
L label
Write lhe CansdaCemej*
Informslion Bureau, Mos>
(real, lot • (ree copy el
"What the Farmer Csa
Do Will Concreu."
Then b t Ca«atlt
Cement desler ■ *tmt
Btighboihooti Uyouds)
not know Una. ***** m*
his name. *WkW.
THE ISLAXPEIL CUMBERLAND. B.C.
if
\
DAN CUPID-
MAGICIAN
A Ring That Told
a Story •£
By HARRY HOUDINI.      *  t
•K-:-K-H-:-H-:***I-^K-H-!-H*++
In agony of apprehension Williams
started to arrange his modest conjur-
Baf apparatus. A few hours earlier bis
fcbut ns a parlor eutcrtalncr bad been
■ matter of joyous nnd ambitious an-
•rlpnliun. Now Iho brocaded walls of
lenutor Morgan's music room fairly
ftreutened to close lu and cboko hint,
»hile (he fragrance of hotliuii.se flow-
gre oppressed him strangely. He won.
(trod how he had ever dsred to aslt
*•* vaudeville agent wbo applied Mra.
Morgan and other fashionable hostesses wllh talent to let him substitute
**t Tliorlcy, the eminent magician who
fetid fallen a victim to la grippe.
Tan.I help you iu any way} I am
Miss Morgan. The servants are all
•nay wilb supper, and I tbought-per-
feips"-
Tuuiig Williams hnd never thought
At needing help, but as be faced tbe
tiear eyed, flower-like girl and tbe echo
tf her, well modulated voice rang ln
Us cars bo felt that bis ono hope of
Mcceetllug lay iu ber presence. Men
nd women wiser ln lhe social world
than Frank Williams had fallen uuder
tte spell of Helen Morgan's rare sympathy and charm and wondered how
this girl of high Ideals and gentle manners could be the daughter of Senator
Morgan, ponderous with tbe arrogance
*t newly acquired wcaltb, and Mrs.
Morgan, wbo radiated commonplace attributes as ber recently purchased dia-
' Bonds scintillated light.
At Frank's faltering thanks Helen
Morgan began quietly, but deftly, to
«rry out his Instructions, placing a
■ght gilt table here, a (nboret tliere,
■nd wl*jre It would be within reach of
taae conjurer's band a candle or a
gleaming revolver. And, though afterward Frank Williams could not tell
low It bad happened, before Ibe settings for his act were prepared tbe girl
hsd drawn out bis tale of bait tragic
struggle, tbe prosaic, bard bended father storming over Ibe visionary, Inexplicable nature of bis youngest son, tbe
loyal mother secretly brooding over
and abetting this odd chick of ber littlo flock, his constant endeavor to
learn the secrets of magic and then to
secure a hearing, even the rented dress
suit and the gold watch wblcb had
heen pawned tbnt very; afternoon' to
buy bonbons nnd glided lijnkots to distribute among his youthful auditors.
And ns be finished it seemed to He'en
Morgan that sbe stood In the presence
of a struggling genius.** She bad read
sucb stories uf poets, musicians and Inventors.
Tbo performance was a great sne-
e*ess. Tbo children were duly mystlAed
and moro than delighted with ths
showers of trinkets nnd bonbons which
apparently came from an inexhaustible
•ource. Mrs. Morgan bad condescended to express ber appreciation, a footman bad served a supper of such rare
delicacies that Frank bad, longed to-
pack tbem all up wilh bis paraphernalia nnd take tbem to his motber, and
now ns he walked down tbo broad avenue leading from the bouse be felt ns
. If tbe bouse behind him was fairyland
Indeed aud Helen Slurgan ils princess.
But he was roused from his dream
by a grim faced butler, who camo hurrying after him.
"You're to como back to the house,1*
Was tbo brusque order, and, lo-enter-
Ing pis fairyland, Wlllhtms.faecd Senator Morgan, a glowering figure, In tba
foreground and Mrs. Morgan, a hys-
torlcnLone, In tbo background. But la
the eyes of Iho third be read pity, the
same lender pity which lie had seen ln
her eyes when Helen Morgan bad
stooped to pick up bis trick rabbit as
the frightened animal, escaping from
his pocket and trembling at tbo shouts
•f tbe children, bad run to tbo girl for
protection.
"It's Jnll for yon, young man, unless
you produce my wife's rings. She left
tbem behind tho rock crystal vase In
tbo music room, nud wc duu't propose
to have (hem 'disappeared' as you do
handkerchiefs aud rabbits."
Tbo aceuo which followed wns a horrible nightmare to the young magician
—his own protestations of Innocence
drowned In Mrs. Morgan's hysterics,
Eenntor Morgan's orders for an officer,
Helen's pleading for time to sear-h
snd dually tho discovery of lhe rings
by n maid ln Mrs. -Morgan's dressing
room. And wben tt was nil over Williams was thrust out tn the night
through a side entrance, feeling more
like a thief (linn an acquitted man.
Then suddenly a gentle band fell upon
his arm, aud a gentler voice murmured
1 In his car:
"Just a minute, please. I want to
tell you how sorry I am. I hoped this
Would be tbo greatest night of your
Bfo"-
For one long minute the young man
Who hnd bis own way to make und tho
lirl wboso future had heen assured so
far ns wealth could accomplish this
feat looked Into each other's eyes. And
Ihe soul of the dinn, suddenly born,
Wont out to lhe tlirino tenderness of
Innate womanliness which is a greater
power than mere physical beauty. He
(poke quietly, but with new found con-
•douce.
"It bas been a wonderful, wonderful
night to flie, and some day I am coming back to tell yon why."
,0000000
j Under tbe cbaperonage of a dowager duchess who knew how to turn
her title to financial account Helen
Morgan was "doing" tbe Londou season, ln a Mayfuir drawing room sbo
sat, and beside ber wus a man wltb a
mouocle, an English accent above reproach and a patronizing dir. Of course
the Morgan millions would mean tbo
rouiautllug ot his ancestral but crumbling castles. But tben tbe titter Indifference of tbis girl Irritated him even
while It commanded his admiration.
"I suppose you saw Erskiue In Paris.
He's been the go over thero— mudc by
the American set, I understand. Tbey
say it's his manners as mucb as his
art that got the women all going. He
never speaks during bis performance
and has tbe most Inscrutable eyes.
Never could understand why women
went in so heavily for eyes. Conjurers boro tue, as a rule, but I'm curious to sec this man."
Helen Morgan hardly beard wbat tb*
man wilh thu monocle was saying.
"Erskiue!"
In a secret drawer of ber Jewel case
llieic lay a card, "iVnuk Erskiue Williams," tbe card of tbe man wbo bad
never come back, never sent ber a
message In five years, the man who
bud forgotten! But, uo; Ibis could not
be be, for the man wbo bnd promised
bad a ready tongue—yes, a ready
tongue, as till men had-wbo promised,
A flutter of fans nnd a murmur of
subdued Interest announced tbat tb*
lion of thc evening hnd arrived. A
quick Inclination of the bead, a snapping of long, slender Angers, anil the
performance was uuder way. With
lightning rapidity aud wonderful deftness tbe conjurer worked, aud th*
breathless audience watched, not sa
much tbe tricks as tbe unsmiling lips,
tbe inscrutable1 eyes.
Only one person in the fashionable
audience saw something more, and
(bat a quivering, blue eyed gil wbo
for ono brief second bnd met ar*"1 held
the magician's glume and seen burning ln thoso inscrutable eyes a Art
which bnd burned tbere on a night live
years before, a fire lit centuries agun*
in tbe eyes of tbe world's flrst man-.
Adam.
Thc assistant called for a ring wlfb
whicli bis master would work a new
frlck. Mechanically Helen Morgan
banded him a miignilht'iit hoop uf
pearls. Erskiue took the ring gravely,
raised a silver hammer aud apparently
smashed tbo trinket Into a thousand
ploces on an anvil of curiously wrought
silver. Tben he produced n sealed casket of water, lu which swam a gold-
lish, and iu Iho tnuulb of tbo fish he
found tbe hoop ot pearls. Ilut the riug
was not returned lulls owner by the
assistant. Instead, as tho room rang
wltb applause, tho magician himself
walked quietly down thc aisle, formed
by tbe purling of many silken skirls,
aud placed tbe ring ou the girl's trembling white band. Not even tlie man
with (be monocle noticed Unit the con*
jurer for an'Instant'held the slltu fin«
gers In bis with a pressure that threatened to crush them, nor did he dream
.that within tho girl's palm lay another
riug at which she dared not look.
Somewhat awkwardly she slipped on
ber long white glove. She was so
deeply engaged lu this operation that
sbe did not oven see Ihe conjurer as lis
left tho improvised stage. In the privacy of tbo boudoir hours later r.h*
held tho conjurer's ring uuder tbo light
of a blazing electrolier.
"Sucb on odd—I was almost going fa
say ugly—riug," she murmured as she
slipped lt on her linger aud turned it
Ibis way and lhat. A diamond, aa
emerald, an ..mcthyst, a ruby, another
emerald, a sapphire and a topaz formed tho brilliant 'ilf hoop. Then suddenly ber checks burned crimson. Sho
bnd rend the story of tbe many colored
gents. Their first letters spelled "dearest," tho message of the man wbo had
not forgotten his promises.
With her chocolate the next morning
came nn oddly shaped French gray envelope, bare of crest or monogram.
"Forglvo my temerity of Inst nlgbt,"
ran tbo message within,-"but for years
I have been carrying thnt ring In my
pocket, waiting for our meeting. Tbey
were tbe first gems I bought wben
success camo my way, and I gathered
(hem ono by one, each perfect In Its
way and worthy the ono woman In all
tho world. Yet last night I beard you
wero to marry tho Earl of Warburton.
If Ihls is true, do what you will with
tho ring. If It ls hut nn Idle rumor,
drop mo a single word to the Hotel
Cecil, 'Come.'"
Ei'skluo laid aside the morning papers, heralding blm ns tlio fashionable
world's new found Idol, (o answer a
summons to tho phone. The voice at
the other end of the wlre*fnltored, then
grew firm and strong: "Come. I could
not wait to write."
STALKING TNE DUKE.
TOO CLEAR A CASE.   gucLE SAM'S ASSAY OFFICE.
rVni.y-a-I.lnc*   Followed   the   "Iron
dan" To Hla Own Advantage.
How a Cabinet secret Tie revealed In a most amazing faablon by a
needy and adventurous penny-a-liner
at the end of his resources Is related
by Mr. J. D. Symon, In "The Press
and Its story." It waa daring tb*
administration of tbe Duke of Wellington, at a jucturc when tbe Opposition would bare given anything for
some hint of the Cabinet's policy.
Tbe recret was well-guarded until
one evening, jus: at tbe rising ot tbe
: House, a i jny-a-llner, who bad been
hanging about Westminster waiting
for something to turn up, saw tbe
duke emerge from the House of Lords
accompanied by one of bis colleagues.
"Now, tbe duke, In bis later years,
was very bard of hearing, and cherished that not uncommon Illusion of
tbe deaf, that Ic order to make other
peoplo hear be, too, mils', shout. It
occurred to tbe starveling scribe that
i If be would only follow the Prime
' Minister he might hear something to
bis advantage.
"The night was dark, so tbe penny-
a-liner managed to keep well within
earshot, and yet to escape remark by
those he wis following.   He had not
gone very far before he knew be was
In luck's way.   Tbe duke was actually
talking about the situation ln his us-
* ual loud tones, and gradually be pro-
! ceeded to unfold the policy of the
' Cabinet.   The penny-a-liner listened
with all his ears and kept well wltb-
i In range of the Minister all tbe way
to Apsley House.   Thereupon, with
| beating heart, be sought some frlend-
, ly refuge and committed his discovery
I to writing. This done, he lost no time
In calling upon the editor of one of
the  leading Opposition   papers.   So
humble a scribe waa, of course,  un-
,! nown to the editor, but tbe plea
that the visitor had an urgent communication to make gained him admission,
"The editor glanced over tbe article and was thunda.-lruck when he
realized Its nature. Here —as tbe
very thing for wblch the Party had
been praying. Naturally the editor Inquired how so unln.iuential a person
could have come by such very private information. Being satlsfloi',
however, of the truth of the man's
Btory, he decided to print it, and gave
the reporter a handsome check for I
his enterprise. Next day the appear- !
ance of the news, reinforced by a
leading article, spread consternation
In tbe Government camp. Wbo was
the traitor?
"Somewhat of a hue and cry was
raised, and tbo duke's friend fell under suspicion. Relations between tbe
Prime Minister and his colleague
were, ln fact, somewhat strained, until at last the true story of the remarkable discovery was given to tbe
world."
io th* Judge Decided It Wae Usoloes
to Oo On.
"When did your husband begin treating you cruelly?" asked ber lawyer.
"It was about a year ago," replied
tbe pretty petitioner.
"Wbat happened5"
"Wc were on our way to New York."
"Yes.   Did he strike you?"
"No. I ssked him to get a drawing
room, so tbat I would not bave to undress In my berth."
"And ho refused?"
"Yes. He said bis mother had never
occupied a drawing room In a sleeping
car and be didn't consider me any better than bis mother."
"Was tbat the only time be ever was
cruel loyou!"
".N'o. aVfter I had bought my fall
clothes last year tbey were so line
that I couldn't ride in a public conveyance without ruining Ihem, aud
when I explained to him that be would
bare to buy an electric to save my
clotbes he told me to go ahead and ruin
the clothes aud get tbe kind tbat could
be worn ln street cars next time."
"It will be useless to go on wltb th*
ease," the judge Interposed. "There la
no doubt that the man Is absolutely
heartless."—Chicago Record-Herald,
"Labby" Again.
The late Henry Labouchere always
vastly enjoyed the title ot "Christian
member for Northampton," given lo
distinguish bim from Mr. Bradlaugh.
In a speech at Northampton ln support of bis colleague he gave the
following purely apocryphal account
of his leave-taking of Mr. Gladstone:
And, men of Northampton, that
grand old man said to me, as be patted me on tbe shoulder, "Henry, my
hoy, bring him back, bring him
back." It ls difficult to imagine Mr.
Gladstono patting the member for
Northampton-on the back and calling him, "Henry, my boy." The
success of this allusion to tbe Prime
Minister, however, waa enormous,
and tbe name stuck. Mr. Gladstone
was tbe "Grand Old Man" for the
rest of bis life.
"Labby" died as be had lived—a
jester.   His biographer writes:
The earliest remark of Mr. Labou-
chere's that I have recorded In this
book was a jest, and so was the last
I beard blm utter. On tbe afternoon
of the day before he died, as I was
Bitting at his bedside, the spirit lamp
that kept the fumes of eucalyptus
In constant movement about his
room, through some awkwardness of
mine, was overturned. Mr. Labouchere, who was dozing, opened his
eyes at the sound ot the little commotion caused by the accident, and
perceived the flare-up. "Flames?"
he murmured interrogatively. "Not
yet, I think." He laughed quizzically, and went off to sleep again.
Hew He Worked It.
1  Her hat obscured his view at th*
theater, and ln kindly voice he leaned
forward and asked If It would be possible for her to remove lt.
A stiffening of tho head wss ber only
answer. After a few moments he repeated bis request. Tben sb* turned
on bim,
"Tbcre Is no demand tor my doln'
so," sbo said.
"No demand?" he echoed.   *
Tben be rolled bis overcoat and
placed It on his seat, sat on lt and,
getting bis bat from under tbe seat,
placed lt on bis-head.
In a moment there was a cry of
"Ta*e tbat bat off,"
And with a swift movement tb*
lady unfastened ber hatpins and removed her bat So did the man.~Ex-
change.
A Definition.
Three ladles bad planned a drive together, but wben tbe hour appointed
came one of them asked to be excused
on tbe score of an,attack of indigestion. Her companions expressed their
disappointment and sympathy, but tha
elder of tbem Insisted that tbe excuse
was Insufficient
"Yon shouldn't let yourself be governed by such Ideas," sho said. "It ls
really all as you tblnk. Wbat is indigestion, anyway?"
Thc third lady, wishing to ovoid tbe
apparently impending discussion on
mental control of Illness, broke ln
quickly:
"Indigestion," Bhe said, "Is the failure to adjust nVsquare meal to a round
stomach."—Harper's.
Wall Street's Small Geld Refinery Does
a Big Business.
There Is a real electrolytic refinery ln
Wall street. New York city, 6uiall ln
size, It Is true, but very big In th*
value of its output This Is tbe United
States assay office.
Tho relation between tbe assay office
and tbe public Is twofold. First, tbe
assay office buys Impure gold and gold-
silver alloys from tbo public. This
may be the gold output of a copper refinery or of a cyanide mill or gold scrap
from dentists or gold Imported from
Europe or old jewelry. Second, the
assay office refines gold and alloys for
tbe various requirements of the public.
The metallurgical process carried out
at the assay office ts therefore thc separation of lhe gold from the silver and
tbe other metal impurities and the
production of the metals lu pure form.
Formerly lho sulphuric acid parting
process was o iploycd. but lhe electro*
lytic refining process bus now been
universally Introduced Into Ibe United
States mints, and when a few years
ago the New York assay ollice wss
damaged by Are tnd It became necessary to rebuild and re-equlp tbe office
thoroughly It was decided lo introduce
electrolytic refining. Tbe new equipment Is thoroughly up to date.
In buying gold or gold alloys from
tbe public the assay ollice bas fixed
only two restrictions. These nre that
the material shall contain not less than
SO per cent of gold and silver and
ahall be worth at least $100.-Mctallur-
glcal and Chemical Engineering.
•hi-.-********.*
* PRACTICAL JJEALTH HINT.
Th* Cold Bath.
If you do uot feel warm after
a cold bath you bad better not .,
take lt, for It Is doiug you no t >
good. It is n mistake to get luto
t bath by standing In tbe cold
water aud hesitating before taking tbe plunge, fur this drives
tbe blood up toward tbe bead
aud is likely to cause congestion
of tbe blood vessels of the
throat The best way Is to stand
In an empty bathtub aud turn
on Ibe shower, so that the cold
water will strike the bead aud
shoulders first
If tbere is not a shower apparatus, souse tbe bead and ueck < i
first with a sponge or duck the
bead under water; then get lu
and plunge the whole body uuder as quickly as possible. Another mistake Is to stay In too
long. Generally speaking, one
plungo Is enough. After the bath
rub tbe skin briskly wltb rough
towels, tr help Iu tbe return of j ',
tbe surface circulation. Vigor*
i exercise Is also good after a ',
*-**■*♦
LATEST DEATH TEST.
In Boston.
"Come here, Clarence," sold tbo Boston motber. "I reel that I must chastise you. Wbat bavo you to say for
yourself?"
"Well, motber, It Is a matter of Indifference to me," replied tbe precocious five-year-old. "Too violent exercise, however, might prove detrimental
to your health, and you and father
might submit tbo matter to consultation."—Florida Times-Union.
Household Hints.
"This Is a bum recipe book," declared tbe militant suffragette.
"What's wrong?"
"Been all through It and not a recipe
can 1 find for making bombs."—Louisville Courier-Journal.
STARRED IN SPORTS.
College Athletes Who Havo Attained
Fame In Publio Life.
A surprisingly large number of men
vow In the public eye were athletic
"stars" during their college days. President emeritus of Harvard, Charles William Eliot, was a member of the varsity crow of 1853, and the present bead
of tho same university, Dr. Abbott
Lawrence Lowell, was n member of
tbe track team of 1ST7, bis specialty
beln- the one mile run.
Thomas B. Reed, the famous "czar''
of tbe bouse of representatives, rowed
No. i on tho boat crew Howdoln college put on the water in 1SS8, nud Robert E. Peary won the baseball throwing contest at the same college in 1875.
ltnbert Bacou, former assistant secretary of state nnd ambassador to
France, was a member of botb tbe football and track 'ains of Harvard ln
jS70. while Tl omasi l-eo McClang, former treasurer of (he United States,
was captain of tho Yale football team
of ISOI. H. S. (Iruves, chief forester
of tbe United States, was quarterback;
on lho sumo team, while Gilford l'ln-
ebot, his predecessor, was a member ot
the Yale football squad of 1888.
Bishop Franklin S. Spalding of Utah
,was a member of the Princeton foot-
bull team of 1886, while Robert E.
Speer, International secretary of tbe
Presbyterian board of foreign missions,
was a star of the great 188S team of
the samo college. Richard Harding
Davis was a notable end rush at Lehigh during his college days, and Frederick Remlngtoj, tho artist, played on
the Yale rush line while in college.—
Ladies' Home Journal.
An Eyeing Acquaintance.
*y^f^t>^^»>t^^«'t^^«yi4r»i4eA*>t^
* PRACTICAL HEALTH HINT.
Canker Sores.
Canker sores lu tlio mouth result from a badly balanced diet
Tbe stomach digestion may be
satisfactory   and   yet   cankers
may develop.   To cure cankers <S
burn them wltb some aromatic 9
sulphuric acid applied to the ul- <?>
ccrs with a wooden toothpick. To j|
prevent Ihem eat regularly, properly and slowly. The diet should
be  a   proper  balance   between
vegetables,   fruits,    meat   and
bread.     Constipation   must   be
prevented.   Cankers have a purpose.   They warn.   If the warning ls not heeded more serious
trouble follows,
i*A*AAA***A&At*H*&t ♦*♦*♦»«
She Hated Garrlck.
Mrs. Cllve was eminent as an actress on the London stage before Garrlck appeared, and as bis blaze of excellence threw all others Into comparative Insignificance Bhe never forgave him and took every opportunity
of venting her spleen. One night as
Garrlck was performing "King Lear"
sbe stood behind tho scenes to observe him and, in spite of the roughness of ber nature, was bo deeply affected that sho sobbed one minute
and abused blm tbo next, and at
length, oyercomo by his pathetic
touches, she hurried from the place
with the following extraordinary tribute to his powers: "Hang him! I
believe be could act a gridiron."
Killed and Armed.
Up to about a hundred years ago
tbe Highland Scots clergy not only
wore tbe kilt on all occasions, but
tbey had their own tartan, tbe main
color of which was dark blue. Further, the Highland cleric of the old
days usually went about armed to tho
teotb. Even on the Sabbath be would
be preceded on his way to church by
his servant bearing bis broadsword
and pistols. \V.icn the minister as-
i conded the pulpit he took bis weapons wltb blm, placing tbem ln a
conspicuous position on the pulpit
ledge.
Giving Htm a Hint. .
Young Author (engaging rooms)—
You have several literary men board-
lrg here, I believe?
Landlady—Yes, quite a number. I
like literary men.
"1 am delighted to hear It."
"Yes. Y'ou see, llteraiy men never
complain when I demand cash ln advance. They are ujoc to tt,"—London Opinion.
"Have yon ever been introduced to
Miss Rich?"
"N'o. but our eyes bave met"—Chicago Dully News.
The Limit,
Gobe — Cadge owes everybody In
town.
Steve-Is bis credit bnd?
Gil bo— Bad? Why, ho couldn't ax-en
borrow trouble.—Cincinnati Enquirer.
A Poser.
North America—At Inst they hav*
cut tlie neck of the land in two.
South America—And lho question Is:
Am 1 beheaded or aro you befooled1*—
Kew York Sun.
I Should Hear Him Thon!
"In bis speeches Griggs Is confounding his enemies'/"
"Y'es, and privately he Is using oven
stronger language."—Buffalo Express.
Easy Matter.
"What do I say at tho wedding?"
"Not a word, dad.   All you utter ts
the check."—New York Evening Journal
Boils His Berriesa
"If you would avoid Illness," snys
Trofcssor Metchnikoff, "live as a have
lived for fifteen years. See these ba-
nnunsV". he added, holding up two ripe
specimens, "I am taking tbem'home to
eat Most peoplo tblnk tbat the thick
rind makes this fruit At to cat raw.
Far from it I steep tbem In boiling
water after the rind has boon removed
to destroy tbo disease germs, and 1
never nse a knife, fork or spoon Unit
bus not flrst been, subjected lo a ml-
crobo destroying flame. Alt my food
| must be cooked nr linked. My salads
' nre nil scalded nud drinking* water fll-
' tereil nnd boiled. Raw fruit nud veg-
; et.tbles hnve no placo nt any table;
even berries nre subjcotiil to a boiling
water bath before tbey aro served."
The Lost Country, Sogdians.
In lho deserts of Chinese Turkestan
the snnds hnvo burled a vast civilization tbnt was forgotten for centuries.
The dry sand preserved Inlact numbers of manuscripts In an unknown
language written in unknown characters. Theso M. llaiilhlot, n young
Frenchman, has lunnugcd to decipher
liy tiie fortunate finding of fragments,
that had notes In utlirr known Inn-
gunge*. Tbl.** discovery, it is expected,
will lead to tho world Ruining a much
, further knowledge of the lost country,
Stigdlnnii, and Its people, mentioned by
Klnilio and Herodotus.
An Improved Searchlight.
- New value bus been given to search-
llclits for ocean liners liy n device
wlilch controls the direction of the rayo
from n telescope. The observer can
look through tlie telescope,' swinging
It from side to side seeking Icebergs nr
uny other objects, nud the searchlight
Mounted near at bund, or perhaps high
abort*, will make the samo swings,
keeping the light always directed lit
the point toward which tbe. telescope
Is directed. The control of the searchlight Is entirely by electrical media-
Blsui.—Exchange.
London's Pcstal Tube.
T.niwlon's proposed postal tuho Is to
be nine fect In diameter nnd six nud
li half miles long. It ts to be fitted for
two tracks, each two feet wide, carrying steel trucks, operated by motors'.
The line proposed vf be constructed
throughout In the London clay
Based Upon the Action of Fluoreeeln*
Upon the Blood.
A remarkable new method of testing
absolutely whether n dead person Is
really dead uud thus avoiding tbe possibility of premature burial, just announced by Dr. Icard of Marseilles,
bas been received with great Interest
by his colleagues ln Paris.
Dr. Icard's system depends on tb*
question wbetber tbe blood Is still la
circulation or not and consists of a
■mail subcutaneous Injection of a
small quantity of fluoresciue, which Is
quite harmless, but one of the most
violent coloring matters known.
If tbere be tbe slightest motion of
tbo blood tbe fluoresciue, carried
around tbe body, stains It a vivid golden yellow, while tbe eyes become *
deep emerald green. If. on the other
hand, there is no mqvement of tb*
blood the coloring matter Is not dispersed and produces no effect Half
un hour is stated to be enough to make
tbis test.
Tbe laity, while duly Impressed by
this neat method, are asking wbetber
persons who are allveaud undergo th*
dyeing process nnd who later recover
will lose the golden yellow tint and
tlie green eyes, whlcb, ns Dr. Icard describes tbem, "are transforthejl Into superb emeralds, set like jewels lo tbelr
sockets."
It may be added, however, that An-
oresclne Is une of the most transitory
dyes known.-Parls Cor. Philadelphia
Ledger.
MECHANICAL EXHIBITS.
Th* New Idea Is 'Try It Yourself" Instead of "Hands Off."
"Try It Yourself," Instead of "Hands
Off" Is proving to bo such a success
for. the motto of a museum that an
enormous one fo be run on thla principle Is to be built ot Munich. Thousands of machines will be sb arranged
that sny person who wishes—even
boys and girls-tuny turn a lover or
touch a button and so stmt an electric
motor running a pump or a niacblns
tool drilling a hole Into a block ol
steel.
Tbe Idea has been well tested nnd
found to be. practical. In the present
Industrial museum at Munich nbout
half of tbe great number of machine*
on exhibition aro arranged so that vis-
Itors may run them without assistance. Automatic attachments are provided so that no injury can come to
thp machines; in fart. In most instances all tbo visitor Is allowed to do
Is to press (he billion to start tb*
wheels moving.
Tt fascination of controlling power
Is enough to draw great numbers ol
people to the museum nnd to make the
erection of a much larger nnd inor*
ambitious exhibition worth whlln.—
Saturday Evening Post.
Cooking With Cold.
Thnt meat enn he cuoltcd by extrem*
cold as well as by extreme heat ls tb*
contention of a German lurestlgiitnr.
Ho has taken the fiiinlllnr phenomenon
thiit oxlremo cold seems to the touch
like extreme hent nnd r.pplled It to
meats. Ills tests have revealed tb*
fact Hint s temperature of on degree*
below zero, 1'., seems to do the best
and he contends tbnt ment cooked In
this way Is equal to ment cooked with
bent. He recommends, however, thnt
the meat be kept In tightly scaled Jurat
nfier being cooked with cold.
A Busy Flying School.
It has been left to the .military nu-
tliorltles of England to erect the* first
signboard warning people against ni ro-
planes. This is eroded on Salisbury
plain, near the Central Flying school,
where the naval nnd military flying
men are trained. On busy days aeroplanes pass and repass over the plain
with such frequency that nn unsus|i«ct*
lug civilian .might-easily receive dam.
nge from one of tbo defensive "wasps*
of Great Britain.
I Chicago Shinea In Electricity.
| According to tlio technical mngazln*
Power, Chlcngo produces nnd met
more electricity than any otherclly ll
tbo world. Tlio output of .Tin electric,
supply undertakings In Orenl li;ltntn
I for   (he   yenr   Kill 12   amounted   to
J J.127.4fi0.7*l2 nulls, hut Chicago by Itself hns an iniiin.il output of over SOO,.
j ono.ooo nnd-i'SpecH wltbiu u .coat tl
I t'iru out l.l*OU.tlUtl.utirtj ■th*. .**..*« frukM. «JU3l^-M Al-t*_
SPRING
M1LUNERY
'iVis department m receiving special attention in the
Big Store, mid under  tlie ctijmlile supervision of Alts
Clifford, those entrusting us with their orders will receive
attention, and thei/ moy he itssufed of getting something
new, suiuhle and seasonable,
<)ur nuxlels will he replaced from time to timo as the
' season opens out with new and smart hats.
For those wanting an everyday knoek-ahout hat we
hnve a very choice selection of very smartly-trimmed
models at prices it'hich will meet your approval.
LADIES SILK HOSE
.lust arrived a  shipment of New Silk Hose in  all the
eading colors, r/ood wearing quality.   '   Price $1.50
NewVeranda Bamboo Blinds
In all the wanted sizes at 4ft hy 8ft, 95 cents
LOCAL   NEWS
Wesley Willard returned from
a visit to Nanaimo on Sunday
His Honor Judge Barker held
County Court here on Wednesday
Mr. and Mrs. Samuel Calhoun
of Courtenay passed through
Cumberland in their touring car
on Tuesday.
BChas Horth of West Cumber-j
land is selling out and leaving
for Nanaimo.
The Cumberland Gleemen gave
a grand concert at Bevan last
evening.
J. N. McLeod and Joseph Wai*
CANCELLATION OF
RESERVE
Notice is hereby given that the
reserve,    the  notice of   which
appeared in the B.C. Gazette on
the 27th. of  December, 1907 is
cancelled in so far as it relates to
the following parcels of land;-
the W. 1-2 of the S.E. 1-4, theS.
W. 1-4 and the S.l-2 of the N.W.
1-4 west of the river in Section 4;
the S.E. 1-4, the S.E. 1-4 of the
S.W. 1-4 and the N.E.1-4 in Section 5; S.l-2 of the S.E. 1-4 in
iSection8; the S.E. 1-4, the S.W.
11-4 and the E. 1-2 of the N.E. 1-4
l-4anatne**a. i-i". v..-----    ,
J. N. McLeod ano-jiB*!"' " - | in Section 16; and tWi a. ™ .
ker left by auto for Nanaimo on U^^^M
Tuesday and returned ou Tours-\%J^*h the N.E 1-4 of the
day evening. ■ «■'*• ^ •" Section 32; .the N.L.
The   Cumberland
111   HUI     a_a.a~~. J
in a previous issue, that by buying here you can save
more as well as depend on having tlie best goods, antl tlie
best ol service.   ..    :  ,. .    /,- -
A speciality in tliisde/mttineiit at-present is a side, line in
Alarm Clocks «n a i time-keepn 75c. each
mc   w.        Volunteer
Fire Brigade will give a masquerade ball on Tuesday March 17th
in the Cumberland Hall. SThe
prize list amounts to over $100,
A petition was circulated here
on Thursday among the Courtenay property holders of this city
against the incorporation of that
town.
Victoria contractors are expected to commence work on the new
C. P. R. station and round house
at Courtenay next week.
It is reported that the Comox
Logging and Railway Co. will reopen their logging camp on April
1st instead of March 15th as
stated.
Chas. Frenberg of San Francis-
I ca formerly with the Treadwell
Mining < Co.   Alaska arrived on i
Sunday and is now at No.8 town-
site.
R.R. Picking chief accountant
of the Canadian i Collieries office
at Victoria, accompanied by Mrs,
** **_  a-i.,*.*.
District, anu mc »,.»	
N.E. 1-4 in Section 32; the N.E.
1-4 of the S.W. 1-4, and the N.
W. 1-4 and N. 1-2 of the N.E. I-
4 Section 33; the N. 1-2 of the
N. W. 1-4 and the N. 1-2 of the
N. E. 1-4 in Section 34; and the
5. 1-2-and N.W. 1-4 of the N.W.
1-4 in Section 35, all in Township
6, Sayward District,
BERWICK
No. 8 MINE TOWNSITE
The Next and Nearest Property to the Mines,
Sawmills,   and   Absolutely Inside   Property.
1-4 to 1-2 acre Lots, 60x80 by 120
feet deep, $150 to $225 per Lot
Easy terms.    You'll be on Easy Street in buying these.
It's the White Man's City.    We do not sell to Asiatic**.
Lots an* selling fast, apply to A. Pailthrope, "The Store," Berwick, or
Hurry Idiens
British Columbia Investments Ltd,Court^
DON'T  DELAY  RINGING  UP  36.
"The Magnet Cash Store"
Say warn wioiun.,
The said lands will be open for
entry by pre-emption on Monday,
the 18th day of May at the hour
of 9 o'clock in the forenoon? all
applications to be made at the
! office ef the Government Agent,
Vancouver.
No Pre-emptior. Record shall include more than 40 acres of land
except in cases where it is desirable to include small fractional
portions of legal Subdivisions;
information in which connection
may be obtained from plans on
view   at the above mentioned
Agency,
R. A.Renwick
Deputy Minister of Lands.
Lands Department,
Victoria. B, C.
11th February, 1914.
FOR SALE BY TENDER.
Tenders will be received by
the undesigned not later than 4
p.m. on the 5th day of March
1914 for the purchase of the half
lot and two story building known
as The K. Abe & Co. General
Store situated on Dursmuit*
Avenue in the City of Cumbeland
' tr:«iaaaai*   tw    arty
STOVES
HARDWARE
FURNITURE
TUNGSTEN lamps.
Prmntly^uwiUpay-ihrvvhatyouuseouyour
ttH it teaehes economy, instead  ,f—.     lo h„«
nSUhine«'«WHSlK,ssihleitisesSe,.ia   t/ou haul
T^tenl,m^ in every ,W,,,as it is a decided .,av,,,g.
We have just placed in stock a large supply of these at
mluced price*
10,16, 25'& 40 Watt Lamps 50c.
60 Watt Lamps 60c. each
These ate larg« enough for uny home and no one should
be without them.   Every Iwnj? tested.
n.*.!*"*-  ...    *-"**J   aa*   ~-.-._
Picking spent a few days in Cum- terms cash.     Highest   or   any |
berland assisting the local staff.   te"de1' mt™Tr?ty SSgfi86,
Simon Leiser & Co.
LIMITED
"The Big Store"
H. S. Fleming of the Canadian
Collieries arrived from Victoria
by auto on Tuesday. On Wednes-
dar he inspected the local works
and returned Thursday.
Every attention given matern
ity cases by Mrs. Edward Baldwin
West Cumberland.
For Sale Cheap—A five room
cottage, on Penrith Avenue.—
apply P, Acton, Ideal Store.
Day old chicks, White Leghorn
$15.00 per 100. Hatches from
March to May. Hatching eggs
for sale $6.00 per 100.
Skinner & Blenkhorn,
Nanaimo B.C.
WANTED-For the City of]
Cumberland, a HORSE, not more
than five years of age and weighing not less than twelve hundred
pounds.
4 McKinnon,
City Clerk
City Hall, Feb. 27th, 1914.
It  neCeSSaiMJ   caa-a—r —
Edward W. Bickle
"Assignee
K. Abe & Co. Estate
[1. ghilliys iiiivrison
BarrWcr, Hiillritiir
A Nutury FulitltL
"E&utarli W. Uirhlf
NOTARY PUBLIC, CONVEY.\NCER
ANU REAL ESTATE
ffiumbrrlan.*-. S. H.
V. L.Tway
C. H. McMillan
r.E.BATE| 1
Phone 31 Cumberland, B.C.      I    1
ToIntendinq
purchasers
OF
PIANOS
AND   ORGANS
We have just received another car load of the celebrated
Gerhard Heintzman Pianns. We can sell you a Piano
ou easy monthly payments. He have several ea*tra
good second hand pianos, that were taken in exchange
for new ones, at prices ranging from £100 and upwards
HongChongCo.
15per cent off I
DRY GOODS
BOOTS and SHOE
At Bevan Store
pianoforte -Tuition
Mr.RICHARD KIRKHAM, Jr.
Late Pianist of Criterion Theatre,
Dudley, and Coseley Picture House,
Wolverhampton, England, is pre.
pared lo take Pupils lor the piano.
Apply: Residence, Derwent Ave,
or P. O. Box 112,
CUMBER1.NND, B.C,
', L.Tway .-	
V. L TWAY
Contractor & Builder
Framing of all kinds, Mill Wrighting,
Installation of Mill Machinery.
Apply
c. h. McMillan        v. l.tway
Cumberland, B.C.      Courtenay, B.C
CHOICE FRUITS
AND ICE CREAM
IN SEASON
For Candy. Cigars
Hot Tomales
See
CA.Fletcher MusicCo
NANAIMO,      -        -      °   r
B. C.
E. BANKS
FUNERAL
DIRECTOR AND
UNDERTAKER
CUMBERLAND.B.C,
Phonft67
Alien*, tot the
NANAIMO
MARBLE & GRANITE
WORKS
Alex lleliilnraii. Pr«»»l« »"•*
K.tii«ate.»n*in«>IW"'»™i8*,,!d
on Application
Bannerman
IMPORTANT
AUCTION SALES
Tuesday, March 10th
Sale of the whi>le of thc Farm Stock, Implements, Furniture, etc.
at thc Bailey Ranch, Lower Road,Sandwick,forMr.J.S.Shopland
Tuesday, March 31st
Sale of thc Farm Stock, Implements, Furniture, etc., at "Fairview
Farm," Upper Road, Courtenay, for Mr. George Jefferies
ll,     Up{JCa   a\„....,   ~..  .
HARDY & BISCOE
AUCTIONEERS Cot
Courtenay
FireIllsu™ce I Mrs. B.G. Crawford 1
■MJ-II 171?   IM 'J
For absolute
protection write
a Policy in the
London & Lancashire Fire Insurance Co. of
L iverpool.
Total   Assets
8 2 6,7 8 8,930.00
Wesley Willard
LOCAL AGENT
DEALER in j
HAY, FLOUR &
GENERAL FEED
BARN IS NOW FULLY STOCKED AND IMMEDIATE
DELIVERY CAN  BE MADE
Warehouse, Courtenay
Phone Y91 and R99
I MPORTANT TO CUSTOMERS-No Orientals, Agents, or Solicitors
employed.

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