UBC Theses and Dissertations

UBC Theses Logo

UBC Theses and Dissertations

Queering the Pacific Northwest : a case study of the Leaving Silence project Tang, Denise Tse Shang 2002

Your browser doesn't seem to have a PDF viewer, please download the PDF to view this item.

Item Metadata

Download

Media
831-ubc_2002-0267.pdf [ 11.84MB ]
Metadata
JSON: 831-1.0055469.json
JSON-LD: 831-1.0055469-ld.json
RDF/XML (Pretty): 831-1.0055469-rdf.xml
RDF/JSON: 831-1.0055469-rdf.json
Turtle: 831-1.0055469-turtle.txt
N-Triples: 831-1.0055469-rdf-ntriples.txt
Original Record: 831-1.0055469-source.json
Full Text
831-1.0055469-fulltext.txt
Citation
831-1.0055469.ris

Full Text

QUEERING THE PACIFIC NORTHWEST: A CASE STUDY OF THE LEAVING SILENCETROJECT by Denise Tse Shang Tang B.A., The University of British Columbia, 1996 A THESIS SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULFILMENT OF THE REQUIREMENTS FOR THE DEGREE OF MASTER OF ARTS in THE FACULTY OF GRADUATE STUDIES (Department of Educational Studies; Faculty of Education) We accept this thesis as conforming To the required standard THE UNIVERSITY OF BRITISH COLUMBIA November 2001 © Denise Tse Shang Tang, 2001 In presenting this thesis in partial fulfilment of the requirements for an advanced degree at the University of British Columbia, I agree that the Library shall make it freely available for reference and study. I further agree that permission for extensive copying of this thesis for scholarly purposes may be granted by the head of my department or by his or her representatives. It is understood that copying or publication of this thesis for financial gain shall not be allowed without my written permission. Department of Sj>u CAI(QtOAL j/uJ>l£.S The University of British Columbia Vancouver, Canada DE-6 (2788) 11 ABSTRACT Leaving Silence: Queer Asian and Pacific Islander Oral History Exhibit (October 1996) is both a community project and an educational campaign, that was conceived and executed in Seattle, Washington. The 12-panel exhibit is composed of 13 narratives and 34 black-and-white photographs, and its theme is "coming out." The narrators and those who appear in the photographs identify as queer and as Asian and Pacific Islander. The project involved the collaboration of four community-based organizations: the Asian Lesbian and Bisexual Alliance, the Asian Pacific AIDS Council, the Asian Pacific Islander Homosexuality/Homophobia Education Project, and Queer & Asian. In this thesis I analyze this exhibit and demonstrate its relevance to critical pedagogy and to all those movements interested in the establishment of social justice. iii TABLE OF CONTENTS Abstract " Acknowledgements iv CHAPTER I Queering the Pacific Northwest 1 1.1 Leaving Silence: Early Stages 5 1.2 Participants 8 1.3 Role of Advisory Committee Members 9 1.4 A Confession 11 1.5 The Exhibit as a Political Entity 16 1.6 Political Activism: Past and Present 18 CHAPTER II Finding the Queer Subject 21 CHAPTER III Methods and Procedures 33 3.1 Interview Procedures 40 3.2 Project Development: The Later Stage 46 CHAPTER IV Differences with Queer Asian Identity: Narratives and Images of Identity-making. 49 4.1 Generational Differences with Regard to the Use of the Word "Queer " 49 4.2 The Relationship between Achievement and Family Acceptance 55 4.3 Religion 61 4.4 Being in-between 66 CHAPTER V The Pedagogy of a Travelling Exhibit 74 5.1 The Exhibit Format and Its Functions 77 5.2 The Queer Asian Subject on Exhibit....: 82 5.3 Facilitating Dialogues within the Public Sphere 84 5.4 Mediating Activism in Educational Research 86 5.5 The Pedagogy of a Travelling Exhibit 91 CHAPTER VI Conclusion 93 Bibliography 99 Appendix A Volunteer Agreement Form 104 Appendix B List of Advisory Committee Members 106 Appendix C List of Community Endorsements 108 Appendix D Transcript Index Form 110 Appendix E List of Interview Questions 112 Appendix F Consent Form for Interview Subject/Narrator 114 Appendix G Evaluation Form 116 Appendix H Final Memo 118 Appendix I Narratives and Photographs 120 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Sometimes things changed so much during the writing of a paper. Minds shitted, seasons changed, people left. I want to say thank you to the following brave souls: My family and pets in Vancouver and Hong Kong My lover, Kaori Kasai Leslie Roman Henry Koo Joanne Richardson Your support and vision in social justice movements moved me to write and write and write. Also, I want to express my gratitude to these parties: The activists, movers and shakers in Seattle's Chinatown/International District community and Vancouver's queer Asian community. The Working Advisory Committee members, volunteers and participants of the Leaving Silence project. Jean Barman, Tom Sork, Veronica Strong-Boag. Teachers, support staff and students at UBC's Women's Studies Program in 1993 - 1995, especially Shauna Butterwick and Marni Stanley. For Jane Slemon, my English 100 instructor who gave me an A- for my essay on Joseph Conrad, and encouraged me to write more creatively. For another English instructor (Canadian Literature) who told me that I would never be able to write well. And for you, reading the words that follow in the next hundred pages or so. Queering the Pacific Northwest 1 CHAPTER 1: QUEERING THE PACIFIC NORTHWEST Time, now to d e s i s t from t h i s a r b i t r a r y s t o r y . That's r i g h t , d e s i s t , as i n to cease, to stop, to give myself pause. 1 -- Ashok Mathur The moment of coming out is like the moment of coming into consciousness: before it arises, there occurs the slow process of emergence. Like a story waiting to be told, like a person waiting to be found, I take a deep breath and hold it inside. I count the seconds and, eventually, let my breath out. Acknowledging my own identity, no longer bound by social mores and cultural comforts, I come out loudly, drowning your ears with shouts of "Asian lesbian!" I want time to stop, right at this moment, while the echoes still ring in your ears. -- Denise Tang Leaving Silence: Queer Asian and Pacific Islander Oral History Exhibit2 i s the c u l m i n a t i o n of a community e f f o r t i n S e a t t l e to document "snapshots" of what "coming out" means to i n d i v i d u a l s who i d e n t i f y as queer and as Asian and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r (API). 3 Our "snapshots" c o n s i s t of t h i r t e e n short n a r r a t i v e s enhanced by t h i r t y - f o u r black-and-white photo p o r t r a i t s . Placed on twelve panels, these t h i r t e e n n a r r a t i v e s and t h i r t y - f o u r p o r t r a i t s represent various experiences i n the l i v e s of queer Asian and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r s . The i n i t i a l idea to conduct a queer Asian and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r v i s i b i l i t y campaign was supported by rep r e s e n t a t i v e s from four l o c a l community o r g a n i z a t i o n s l o c a t e d i n the Chinatown/International D i s t r i c t of S e a t t l e , Washington: the Asian 1 Ashok Mathur, "The Desisting Reader," West Coast Line (Vancouver: Simon Fraser University Press, 1993), 67. 2 The term "queer" was traditionally used as a derogatory term for lesbians, gays, bisexuals, and the transgendered. We, the organizers of the exhibit, reclaim the word "queer" and, in so doing, proudly use it to express our sexual identities. Within the politics of queer activism, "queer" is inclusive of lesbians, gays, bisexuals, and the transgendered. 3 The project organizers never defined the term "Asian and Pacific Islander." We defined ethnic background according to the geographical region to which an interviewee traced his/her ancestral roots. Along with the text of the exhibit panels, we listed the interviewee's name, year of birth, place of birth, ethnic background, and profession (e.g., Ron Ho; b. 1936; Honolulu, Hawaii, United States; Chinese; Jewellery Artist). In a grant application to the funding body A Territory Resource, Anne Xuan Clark of the Asian Lesbian and Bisexual Alliance used 1990 US Census data pertaining to the number of Asian and Pacific Islander women in King County, Washington State, to describe the racial constituency that her organization serves and to justify its request for funds. Queering the Pacific Northwest 2 Lesbian and B i s e x u a l A l l i a n c e (ALBA), 4 the Asian P a c i f i c AIDS Co u n c i l (APAC), the Asian P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r Homosexuality/Homophobia Education P r o j e c t (APIHHEP), 5 and Queer & Asian (Q&A).6 The question I address here concerns how a community p r o j e c t such as the Leaving Silence e x h i b i t can increase our knowledge of queer Asian American l i v e s . In p a r t i c u l a r , I explore how the e x h i b i t can f u r t h e r p u b l i c awareness of the queer Asian American subject and thus be used as a t o o l to enhance pedagogy. This t h e s i s takes a f i r s t step towards demonstrating the r a t i o n a l e f o r queer Asian American s c h o l a r s h i p , i t s complexity as a subject, and i t s place w i t h i n educational c u r r i c u l a . I t a l s o c o n t r i b u t e s to f i l l i n g the gap i n t h i s area of research and to documenting how m i n o r i t y communities m o b i l i z e around s o c i a l i s s u e s . As a s e l f - i d e n t i f i e d Asian l e s b i a n a c t i v i s t , I r e l y upon s o c i a l j u s t i c e movements to inform my research p r a c t i c e , to frame my i n q u i r y , and to f u e l my search f o r a more i n c l u s i v e educational agenda. The purpose of Leaving Silence i s c l e a r l y presented i n i t s mission statement: "To promote the v i s i b i l i t y and understanding of l e s b i a n s , gays, b i s e x u a l s , and transgendered i n the Asian and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r communities." Through the process of producing the e x h i b i t , we created dialogues around the. n e c e s s i t y of queer API v i s i b i l i t y as w e l l as around the need to develop a queer API i d e n t i t y . The term " v i s i b i l i t y , " contested and s u b j e c t i v e as i t i s , was o f t e n used when we attempted to desc r i b e the nature of the e x h i b i t . We b e l i e v e that the coming out n a r r a t i v e s and the photo p o r t r a i t s enhance the p u b l i c r e c o g n i t i o n of queer APIs. For us, the e x h i b i t was a t o o l f o r r a i s i n g p u b l i c awareness of the m a r g i n a l i z e d queer v o i c e s w i t h i n API communities. I t was a l s o a v i s u a l d i s p l a y that featured proud people, described the o b s t a c l e s they 4 ALBA is a social, political, cultural, educational, and advocacy group for Asian lesbians and bisexual women. 5 APIHHEP's mission is to eliminate homophobia, particularly within API communities. 6 Q&A is a collective made up of queer API men. In order to preserve and further queer API culture, this collective fosters leadership, fraternity, and mutual support. Queering the Pacific Northwest 3 faced due to t h e i r r a c i a l and sexual i d e n t i t i e s , and ce l e b r a t e d t h e i r accomplishments. As p u b l i c audiences would vary according to l o c a t i o n , we had no s p e c i f i c audience i n mind when we assembled t h i s e x h i b i t . We imagined that Leaving Silence would have endless venues w i t h i n which to i l l u s t r a t e the need f o r s o c i a l j u s t i c e . This t h e s i s i s a c r i t i c a l i n v e s t i g a t i o n of the Leaving Silence e x h i b i t . I was h i r e d as a p a i d P r o j e c t Coordinator f o r the e x h i b i t . As an a c t i v i s t and researcher, I am concerned w i t h c l a r i f y i n g i t s methodology, i t s r o l e i n q u e s t i o n i n g r a c i a l i z e d and gendered i d e n t i t i e s , and i t s c o n t r i b u t i o n to p u b l i c pedagogy. With regard to p u b l i c pedagogy, my research f o l l o w s i n the path of f e m i n i s t pedagogue Carmen Luke's (1996) c r i t i c a l work i n the area. Her theory regarding acknowledging education as a popular c u l t u r a l form helped me to develop my a n a l y s i s of Leaving Silence as a pedagogical t o o l . Luke argues that "the teaching and l e a r n i n g of feminine i d e n t i t i e s " begins i n i n f a n c y . Mothers l e a r n about pregnancy and c h i l d c a r e by speaking to other women or reading books and magazines. They a l s o l e a r n the meanings of gender through these popular c u l t u r a l forms. In r a i s i n g t h e i r c h i l d r e n , mothers impart to them the s o c i a l l y constructed meanings of f e m i n i n i t y and m a s c u l i n i t y , as w e l l as other s e x u a l i t i e s . C h i l d r e n continue to dis c o v e r and to absorb these d e f i n i t i o n s as they watch t e l e v i s i o n programs and p l a y w i t h t h e i r peers. Luke's i n v e s t i g a t i o n of c h i l d r e n ' s p l a y as p u b l i c pedagogies i n s p i r e d me to l o c a t e pedagogies outside of t r a d i t i o n a l e ducational s i t e s . I see my work as c o n t r i b u t i n g to those areas of s c h o l a r s h i p (e.g., c u l t u r a l c r i t i c i s m , f e m i n i s t s t u d i e s , c r i t i c a l pedagogy, etc.) concerned w i t h , i n t e r a l i a , unpacking conventional terms such as "Asian" (which tends to exclude l e s b i a n s , gays, b i s e x u a l s , and transgendered persons) and "education" (which tends to exclude the importance of p u b l i c pedagogy). Such unpacking serves to show how, through excluding and/or rendering i n v i s i b l e , our terminology c o n t r i b u t e s to the Queering the Pacific Northwest 4 r e p r e s s i o n / o p p r e s s i o n o f t h e O t h e r , t h e m a r g i n a l . I n C h a p t e r 1, " Q u e e r i n g t h e P a c i f i c N o r t h w e s t , " I d e s c r i b e t h e e a r l y s t a g e s o f t h e e x h i b i t ' s development. I p r o v i d e i n f o r m a t i o n on p a r t i c i p a n t s and d i s c u s s t h e i r r e l a t i o n s h i p t o t h e p r o j e c t . As w e l l , I p r o v i d e t h e r e a d e r w i t h my r e a s o n s f o r p u r s u i n g t h i s r e s e a r c h , and I c o n t e x t u a l i z e them w i t h i n A s i a n A m e r i c a n s c h o l a r s h i p and queer A s i a n l i t e r a t u r e . F i n a l l y , by p r o b l e m a t i z i n g t h e c a t e g o r y " A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r , " I a t t e m p t t o d e f i n e t h e term " A s i a n A m e r i c a n " and show how I use i t i n my r e s e a r c h . I n C h a p t e r 2, " F i n d i n g t h e Queer S u b j e c t , " I p r o v i d e a l i t e r a t u r e r e v i e w , c o n t e x t u a l i z i n g my t h e s i s w i t h i n e x i s t i n g s c h o l a r s h i p . I f o c u s my a r e a o f r e s e a r c h on A s i a n A m e r i c a n movements, f e m i n i s t w r i t i n g s and gay l i b e r a t i o n works. I a l s o b r i n g up f i c t i o n a l t e x t s i n t h e form o f n o v e l s and l i t e r a r y e s s a y s t o f u r t h e r s u p p o r t t h e l a c k o f queer A s i a n academic m a t e r i a l s . I end t h e r e v i e w c h a p t e r w i t h a b r i e f d i s c u s s i o n on pedagogy. I n C h a p t e r 3, "Methods and P r o c e d u r e s , " I d i s c u s s i n t e r v i e w p r o c e d u r e s and r e v i e w t h e methodology u s e d i n c o l l e c t i n g d a t a f o r t h e n a r r a t i v e s . I o u t l i n e t h e c o o r d i n a t i o n p r o c e s s e s o f a community p r o j e c t . F u r t h e r m o r e , I e x p l a i n my r o l e as a p a i d o r g a n i z e r and p r o j e c t r e s e a r c h e r . I n C h a p t e r 4, " D i f f e r e n c e s w i t h Queer A s i a n I d e n t i t y : N a r r a t i v e s and Images o f I d e n t i t y - m a k i n g , " I o f f e r a d e t a i l e d a n a l y s i s o f t h e coming-out n a r r a t i v e s . Common n a r r a t i v e themes i n c l u d e : g e n e r a t i o n a l d i f f e r e n c e and t h e use of t h e word "queer," t h e r e l a t i o n s h i p between achievement and f a m i l y a c c e p t a n c e , and b e i n g i n - b e t w e e n . B e s i d e s d i s c u s s i n g such themes i n d e t a i l , I a l s o a d d r e s s t h e ( t o me) s u r p r i s i n g number o f t i m e s r e l i g i o n c r o p p e d up i n t h e i n t e r v i e w s , even though i t was n e v e r d i r e c t l y a d d r e s s e d i n t h e i n t e r v i e w q u e s t i o n s . S i n c e t h e ph o t o g r a p h s make up a major p a r t o f t h e e x h i b i t , I d i s c u s s how t h e s e images were p e r c e i v e d i n our i m a g e - f i l l e d s o c i e t y and how t h e y i n c r e a s e d Queering the Pacific Northwest 5 queer A s i a n v i s i b i l i t y w h i l e , a t t h e same t i m e , l i m i t i n g n o t i o n s of who c o u n t s as queer and A s i a n . I n C h a p t e r 5, "The Pedagogy of a T r a v e l l i n g E x h i b i t , " I e x p l o r e t h e p o s s i b i l i t i e s o f u s i n g Leaving Silence as a p u b l i c p e d a g o g i c a l t o o l . I f o l l o w Carmen Luke's a d v i c e t o seek e d u c a t i o n a l moments i n u n e x p e c t e d p l a c e s (Luke 1996, 1 ) . I a l s o make use of L e s l i e Roman and C h r i s t i a n -S m i t h's (1988) n o t i o n o f a f e m i n i s t m a t e r i a l i s t p o l i t i c s o f c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s t o s u p p o r t t h e e x h i b i t ' s r o l e i n d e s t a b i l i z i n g queer A s i a n i d e n t i t i e s . The c o n c l u d i n g c h a p t e r p r o v i d e s a summary o f p r e v i o u s c h a p t e r s . I p o i n t o u t t h e i m p l i c a t i o n s o f my t h e s i s and how i t l e a d s me t o f u t u r e r e s e a r c h o p t i o n s . Leaving Silence: E a r l y S t a g e s I n O c t o b e r 1995, Thomas Gamble, Anne Xuan C l a r k , and Bob Shimabukuro met t o d i s c u s s s u b m i t t i n g g r a n t a p p l i c a t i o n s f o r a community p r o j e c t . As t h e c h a i r p e r s o n of Queer & A s i a n and t h e gay male o u t r e a c h w o r k e r a t A s i a n P a c i f i c AIDS C o u n c i l , Thomas Gamble was r e s p o n s i b l e f o r s u b m i t t i n g g r a n t a p p l i c a t i o n s t o P r i d e F o u n d a t i o n and t h e C i t y of S e a t t l e . Gamble was t h e p r i m a r y c o n t a c t f o r t h e h o s t o r g a n i z a t i o n , A s i a n P a c i f i c AIDS C o u n c i l (APAC), and f o r m y s e l f as p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r . He h e l p e d me w i t h a d m i n i s t r a t i v e d u t i e s and gave me d i r e c t i o n s f o r c o o r d i n a t i n g t h e e x h i b i t . Anne Xuan C l a r k was t h e campaign manager f o r t h e S e a t t l e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t P r e s e r v a t i o n Development A s s o c i a t i o n , and she s u b m i t t e d g r a n t a p p l i c a t i o n s t o P r i d e F o u n d a t i o n as w e l l as t o A T e r r i t o r y R e s o u r c e . A T e r r i t o r y R e s o u r c e (ATR) i s a p u b l i c f o u n d a t i o n t h a t s u p p o r t s a c t i v i s t , community-based o r g a n i z a t i o n s w o r k i n g f o r s o c i a l , economic, and e n v i r o n m e n t a l j u s t i c e a c r o s s t h e N o r t h w e s t i n Washington, Oregon, Idaho, Montana, and Wyoming. As a b o a r d member of t h e A s i a n L e s b i a n and B i s e x u a l A l l i a n c e , C l a r k worked c l o s e l y w i t h Gamble t o b r i n g A s i a n Queering the Pacific Northwest 6 l e s b i a n and b i s e x u a l women and gay A s i a n and b i s e x u a l men t o g e t h e r f o r community e v e n t s ; t h e y b o t h a l s o worked t o m o b i l i z e t h e s e communities t o f i g h t a g a i n s t v a r i o u s d i s c r i m i n a t o r y measures t a r g e t e d towards i m m i g r a n t s and r e f u g e e s . Bob Shimabukuro was t h e e x e c u t i v e d i r e c t o r and fo u n d e r o f t h e A s i a n P a c i f i c AIDS C o u n c i l . H i s p e r s o n a l and p r o f e s s i o n a l commitment i n t h e f i e l d of AIDS p r e v e n t i o n and e d u c a t i o n e s t a b l i s h e d him as an ou t s p o k e n a c t i v i s t i n t h e A s i a n A m e r i c a n community i n S e a t t l e , Washington. E s t a b l i s h e d i n 1989, APAC s e r v e d as an a d v i s o r y c o u n c i l t o t h e P e o p l e o f C o l o r A g a i n s t AIDS Network (POCAAN). APAC's m i s s i o n s t a t e m e n t c o n c e r n s p r o v i d i n g c u l t u r a l l y r e l e v a n t , l a n g u a g e - a c c e s s i b l e s e r v i c e s and e d u c a t i o n f o r t h e p u r p o s e o f p r e v e n t i n g t h e s p r e a d o f HIV and a s s i s t i n g t h o s e ( p r i m a r i l y w i t h i n API communities) who a r e H I V - p o s i t i v e o r who d e v e l o p e d AIDS. APAC has p r o d u c e d HIV/AIDS i n f o r m a t i o n b r o c h u r e s i n seven API l a n g u a g e s , and i t has c o n d u c t e d s a f e r sex workshops f o r s t u d e n t s as w e l l as f o r h e a l t h c a r e and s o c i a l s e r v i c e p r o f e s s i o n a l s . A p a r t from i t s work i n t h e f i e l d o f HIV/AIDS, APAC was i n s t r u m e n t a l i n b r i n g i n g t h e i s s u e o f homophobia t o t h e f o r e f r o n t o f S e a t t l e ' s A s i a n A m e r i c a n community. As a r e s u l t o f i t s c o l l a b o r a t i o n w i t h APIHHEP, a p o s t e r e n t i t l e d Unite Against Homophobia (which f e a t u r e d e i g h t y p e o p l e from S e a t t l e ' s API communities) was p r o d u c e d and d i s t r i b u t e d t h r o u g h o u t t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s . APAC, t h e h o s t o r g a n i z a t i o n , p r o v i d e d t h e a d m i n i s t r a t i v e s u p p o r t f o r Leaving Silence. I n i t i a l l y , i t was t h e g r a n t w r i t e r s who d e f i n e d t h e p r o j e c t . I n a f u n d i n g p r o p o s a l t o t h e P r i d e F o u n d a t i o n , d a t e d 1 November 1995, Gamble w r o t e : The p r i m a r y g o a l o f t h i s p r o j e c t p r o p o s a l was t o promote t h e v i s i b i l i t y and u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f g a y s / l e s b i a n s / b i s e x u a l s w i t h i n A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r c o m m u n i t i e s . We p r o p o s e t o do t h i s t h r o u g h t h e c o n s t r u c t i o n o f v i s u a l d i s p l a y s t h a t i n c l u d e p h o t o g r a p h s o f g a y / l e s b i a n / b i s e x u a l community members and t h e i r f a m i l i e s . I n a d d i t i o n t o t h e p h o t o g r a p h s , we w i l l p r e s e n t t h e coming out s t o r i e s o f t h o s e p i c t u r e d ( b o t h Queering the Pacific Northwest 7 from the perspective of the i n d i v i d u a l who came out as gay/lesbian/bisexual, as well as the perspective of the family). The exhibit was to appear i n a v a r i e t y of venues, including colleges and u n i v e r s i t i e s , community centres, a r t g a l l e r i e s , museums, health f a i r s , and conferences. In order to strengthen the grant a p p l i c a t i o n , we arranged a consultation between representatives of APAC and representatives of the Wing Luke Asian Museum.7 Before we received funding approval, the museum expressed i n t e r e s t i n d i s p l a y i n g the exhi b i t . It was expected that the exhibit would lead to increased r e f e r r a l s to Asian and P a c i f i c Islander lesbian/gay/bisexual support groups. It would also mean an increase i n requests for f a c i l i t a t o r s capable of. conducting anti-homophobia workshops through APIHHEP, and an increase i n requests for assistance from "mainstream" health organizations interested i n expanding t h e i r programs to include services for API lesbians/gays/bisexuals. 8 By December 1995, the Pride Foundation agreed to provide funding for a part-time project coordinator and a photographer. Not u n t i l A p r i l 1996 was further funding secured from the C i t y of Seattle's Department of Neighbourhoods, thus enabling us to have a f u l l - t i m e coordinator as well as a graphic designer. The time frame for gathering data and completing the exhibit was to be only four months. 7 The Wing Luke Asian Museum is centrally located in the Chinatown/International District. It hosts a permanent exhibit, entitled One Song, Many Voices: The Asian Pacific American Experience, that shows the 200-year history of Asian Pacific American communities in Washington State, focusing on ten major ethnic groups. The Wing Luke Asian Museum was also responsible for producing an archival document entitled The International District: Portrait of a Community, which contained over thirty interviews with long-time residents and businesspeople who provided their personal views of the International District and the Chinese, Japanese, Filipino, Vietnamese, and African Americans who shaped its history. The museum is organized into five sections: immigration, employment, community life, discrimination, and cultural traditions. This institution was significant to the Leaving Silence project because of its critical presence and influence in the Seattle area. 8 Programs for transgender populations were not mentioned in pamphlets and literature from these health organizations, nor was I familiar with any transgender services when I was working within the Chinatown/International District community. Queering the Pacific Northwest 8 I was h i r e d as t h e P r o j e c t C o o r d i n a t o r i n June 1996. My s o c i a l l o c a t i o n as an A s i a n C a n a d i a n posed a c h a l l e n g e t o t h e work i t s e l f . How c o u l d I f o r g e community r e l a t i o n s w i t h o u t b e i n g a p a r t o f t h e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t community? How c o u l d I c o n v i n c e o t h e r s about queer A s i a n v i s i b i l i t y when I am p e r c e i v e d as an o u t s i d e r ? What were t h e terms o f community o w n e r s h i p f o r t h e l o c a l q u eer community when an A s i a n l e s b i a n from Vancouver, B r i t i s h C o l u m b i a , t o o k on t h e r o l e as a p a i d o r g a n i z e r ? I pondered upon t h e s e q u e s t i o n s p r i o r t o my a c c e p t a n c e of t h e p o s i t i o n and d u r i n g t h e f i r s t few months o f my employment. I came t o t h e c o n c l u s i o n t h a t t h e g e o g r a p h i c d i s p o s i t i o n was n o t a major f a c t o r . The f a c t t h a t I am C a n a d i a n d i d n o t i n v i t e any remarks about my a b i l i t y t o b r i d g e c o m m u n i t i e s . More i m p o r t a n t l y , my p r o f e s s i o n a l and v o l u n t e e r e x p e r i e n c e w i t h t h e queer A s i a n C a n a d i a n community p r o v i d e d me w i t h s k i l l s and i n s i g h t s t h a t I c o u l d t r a n s f e r t o a n o t h e r queer l o c a l e . F o r me, b e i n g an o u t s i d e r meant t a k i n g t h e t i m e t o decode community r e l a t i o n s and t o u n r a v e l c o l l e c t i v e memories. I n r e a l i t y , I was warmly welcomed by b o t h t h e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t and t h e queer A s i a n c o m m u n i t i e s . My w o r r i e s as an o u t s i d e r soon d i s s i p a t e d as I c o n c e n t r a t e d on t h e p r o j e c t i t s e l f . Community members s h a r e d o p e n l y , t h e i r e x p e r i e n c e s w i t h me. I was a b l e t o l e a r n from t h e i r words and t o honor t h e i r g e n e r o s i t y t h r o u g h g i v i n g back t o t h e community. I p a r t i c i p a t e d i n community e v e n t s s u c h an a n n u a l p i g r o a s t , a w e l f a r e r e f o r m d e m o n s t r a t i o n , a s t r e e t f a i r and two p a r a d e s . P a r t i c i p a n t s The r e c r u i t m e n t o f v o l u n t e e r s began e a r l y . A c t i v e members i n queer API s o c i a l s u p p o r t and advocacy groups s p r e a d t h e news t h a t we were w o r k i n g on a v i s i b i l i t y p r o j e c t . Gamble s e n t o ut n o t i c e s o f t h e f i r s t a d v i s o r y committee m e e t i n g t o immigrant a g e n c i e s , h e a l t h o r g a n i z a t i o n s , and l o c a l queer API gro u p s . T h i s m e e t i n g was p r e s e n t e d as an i n f o r m a t i o n s e s s i o n t h a t was open t o any i n d i v i d u a l i n t e r e s t e d i n Queering the Pacific Northwest 9 t h e p r o j e c t . V o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r s were m o s t l y r e c r u i t e d from p e o p l e who had p r e v i o u s l y been i n v o l v e d w i t h APAC, ALBA, APIH/HEP, and Q&A. P r o m o t i o n a l m a t e r i a l s and, l a t e r , media c o v e r a g e m e n t i o n e d t h e need f o r v o l u n t e e r s . A c t i v e r e c r u i t m e n t on t h e p a r t o f p r o j e c t s t a f f and a d v i s o r y committee members o c c u r r e d a t d i f f e r e n t o u t r e a c h e v e n t s . 9 P o s i t i o n s t h a t were f i l l e d by v o l u n t e e r s i n c l u d e d : n a r r a t o r s , i n t e r v i e w e r s , t r a n s c r i b e r s , o u t r e a c h w o r k e r s , w r i t e r s f o r community newspapers, and a d v i s o r y committee members. The o n l y p a i d p o s i t i o n s f o r t h e p r o j e c t i n c l u d e d i t s c o o r d i n a t o r , t h e g r a p h i c d e s i g n e r , and t h e p h o t o g r a p h e r . R o l e o f A d v i s o r y Committee Members The a d v i s o r y committee was d i v i d e d i n t o a Work i n g A d v i s o r y Committee and an Hon o r a r y A d v i s o r y Committee. W o r k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee members t o o k a "hands-on" a p p r o a c h t o t h e p r o j e c t i n t h a t t h e y a t t e n d e d m o n t h l y m e e t i n g s and a t t e m p t e d t o p r o v i d e o v e r a l l d i r e c t i o n . Most members o f t h i s committee a l s o worked i n d i f f e r e n t s o c i a l s e r v i c e o r g a n i z a t i o n s w i t h i n t h e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t . I n o t h e r words, t h i s was a c l o s e l y k n i t group o f community a c t i v i s t s who had a c o n s i d e r a b l e i n v e s t m e n t i n t h e p r o j e c t . H o n o r a r y A d v i s o r y Committee members c o n s i s t e d o f community l e a d e r s who l e n t t h e i r s u p p o r t t o t h e e x h i b i t by a l l o w i n g t h e i r names t o be p u b l i c l y a s s o c i a t e d w i t h i t . I n o t h e r words, t h e i r endorsement enhanced t h e e x h i b i t ' s c r e d i b i l i t y . The Workin g A d v i s o r y Committee had t e n members, w h i l e t h e H o n o r a r y A d v i s o r y Committee had e l e v e n (see Ap p e n d i x B, L i s t o f A d v i s o r y Committee Members). As w e l l as c r e a t i n g a t a n g i b l e p r o d u c t , i t was e s s e n t i a l t o p u b l i c i z e and promote i t . W o r k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee members were e x p e c t e d t o a c t i n t h e i n t e r e s t s of t h e e x h i b i t and t o a c t i v e l y p u r s u e o p p o r t u n i t i e s t o promote i t . Some members r a i s e d funds from b u s i n e s s e s 9 Leaving Silence shared information tables with APAC at the Chinatown/International District Summer Open Market and at the Seattle Pride Parade Fair in Volunteer Park. Queering the Pacific Northwest 10 l o c a t e d i n t h e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t , w h i l e o t h e r s u t i l i z e d p e r s o n a l and p r o f e s s i o n a l c o n n e c t i o n s t o s e c u r e i n f o r m a t i o n t a b l e s a t community e v e n t s and/or t o o b t a i n v a r i o u s forms o f media p u b l i c i t y . S t r a t e g i c a l l y , i t made sense t o l i s t c e r t a i n a d v i s o r y committee members, b o t h w o r k i n g and h o n o r a r y , f o r c e r t a i n p u r p o s e s . F o r example, J a n e t Lee SooHoo, b e i n g t h e d e p u t y d i r e c t o r o f t h e A s i a n C o u n s e l i n g and R e f e r r a l S e r v i c e (ACRS), i s w e l l known t h r o u g h o u t Washington f o r h e r work i n t h e f i e l d o f m e n t a l h e a l t h and i s a l s o r e s p e c t e d w i t h i n t h e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t community.' As a r e s u l t o f h e r d i r e c t i n v o l v e m e n t , t h e e x h i b i t r e c e i v e d s u p p o r t from ACRS as w e l l as from I n t e r n a t i o n a l Community H e a l t h S e r v i c e s (ICHS). ICHS's s u p p o r t f o r a queer API v i s i b i l i t y campaign d e m o n s t r a t e d t o o t h e r a g e n c i e s t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f s u p p o r t i n g s o c i a l c a uses t h a t a r e n o t n e c e s s a r i l y d e f i n e d as p a r t o f t h e i r mandates. I t a l s o e ncouraged more community i n v o l v e m e n t , and i t m o b i l i z e d communities t o a d d r e s s t h e i s s u e of homophobia. S i g n i f i c a n t l y , b o t h ACRS and ICHS were k ey h e a l t h s e r v i c e p r o v i d e r s i n t h e a r e a . F o r t h e p u r p o s e s o f p u b l i c i t y , i t was c r u c i a l t o r e c r u i t p o l i t i c i a n s who would s u p p o r t queer API v i s i b i l i t y . The f a c t t h a t M a r t h a Choe ( S e a t t l e c i t y c o u n c i l l o r ) and Velma V e l o r i a (Washington S t a t e r e p r e s e n t a t i v e ) were H o n o r a r y A d v i s o r y Committee members r a i s e d t h e e x h i b i t ' s p r o f i l e and i n c r e a s e d i t s l e g i t i m a c y . As p r o j e c t o r g a n i z e r s , we were k e e n l y aware o f t h e p o l i t i c a l b e n e f i t s t h a t w o u l d a c c r u e t o t h e s e p o l i t i c i a n s as a r e s u l t o f t h e i r s u p p o r t o f t h e e x h i b i t . The p o l i t i c i a n s a l s o had h i s t o r i e s i n community o r g a n i z i n g w i t h i n A s i a n A m e r i c a n movements and had spoken out on s o c i a l i s s u e s c o n c e r n i n g A s i a n A m e r i c a n s . By p u t t i n g t h e queer i s s u e on t h e i r p o l i t i c a l agenda, t h e p o l i t i c i a n s r e c o g n i z e d t h e g r o w i n g s t r e n g t h o f queer A s i a n s and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r s i n t h e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t community. A t t h e same t i m e , t h e s e p e o p l e might r e a p t h e p o l i t i c a l b e n e f i t of a t t r a c t i n g queer A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r v o t e s . However, t h e d e c i s i o n t o Queering the Pacific Northwest 11 a c t i v e l y r e c r u i t p o l i t i c i a n s as Ho n o r a r y A d v i s o r y Committee members was no t embraced by e v e r y W o r k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee member. A t one m e e t i n g , f o r example, Committee Member Thomas Gamble e x p r e s s e d h i s f r u s t r a t i o n when a h i g h - p r o f i l e p o l i t i c i a n on t h e Ho n o r a r y A d v i s o r y Committee d i d no t f u l f i l h e r f u n d - r a i s i n g commitment. We d i s c u s s e d t h i s k i n d o f prob l e m , and we d e c i d e d t h a t f u t u r e p r o j e c t s s h o u l d have c l e a r e r g u i d e l i n e s p e r t a i n i n g t o t h e d u t i e s o f Ho n o r a r y A d v i s o r y Committee members. A C o n f e s s i o n I must p o i n t o ut t h a t we, as a c o l l e c t i v e , f a i l e d t o e n s u r e t h a t Leaving Silence i n c l u d e d P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r s and, t o a c e r t a i n e x t e n t , t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e o p l e . O n l y two p e o p l e o f n a t i v e H a w a i ' i a n a n c e s t r y were i n t e r v i e w e d , and one of them - Kamuela Ka'Ahanui - was n o t e x h i b i t e d . I n wo n d e r i n g why, I remembered t h a t , a t t h e t i m e , I was f o c u s e d on f i n d i n g n a r r a t i v e s t h a t had s u f f i c i e n t c o n t e n t f o r v e r b a t i m a d a p t a t i o n onto e x h i b i t p a n e l s w i t h m i n i m a l e d i t i n g . I found an e x c e r p t i n Ka'Ahanui's i n t e r v i e w t h a t was most i n t r i g u i n g : "To me, coming o u t i s a w h i t e e x p e r i e n c e . Y o u ' l l have t o u n d e r s t a n d more about n a t i v e H a w a i ' i a n h i s t o r y . H a w a i ' i a n s and P o l y n e s i a n s have a s t r u c t u r e d s o c i e t y where gay p e o p l e have a l w a y s been a p a r t o f our h i s t o r y . " But t h e c o n v e r s a t i o n between t h e i n t e r v i e w e r and Ka'Ahanui was s c a t t e r e d , and I was n o t a b l e t o c o n t e x t u a l i z e a d e q u a t e l y t h i s e x c e r p t . I n h i n d s i g h t , i t i s c l e a r t o me t h a t I s h o u l d have c o n t a c t e d Ka'Ahanui f o r a second i n t e r v i e w . As one of t h e p e o p l e r e s p o n s i b l e f o r t h i s e x c l u s i o n , I v e r y much r e g r e t o ur f a i l u r e t o a d d r e s s , o r even see, t h i s i s s u e d u r i n g t h e p r o c e s s of c o - o r d i n a t i n g t h e p r o j e c t . Not o n l y can I n o t r e c a l l how such an e x c l u s i o n was a l l o w e d , b u t t h e m i n u t e s o f t h e Work i n g A d v i s o r y Committee m e e t i n g a t w h i c h I p r e s e n t e d my s e l e c t i o n o f n a r r a t i v e s a r e m i s s i n g from t h e a r c h i v e s . However, t h e i n t e r v i e w t a p e s , t r a n s c r i p t n o t e s , and t r a n s c r i p t i n d e x forms r e m a i n e d w i t h t h e h o s t agency -- A s i a n Queering the Pacific Northwest 12 P a c i f i c AIDS C o u n c i l . These documents gave me an i d e a as t o why c e r t a i n d e c i s i o n s were made, b u t t h e y d i d n o t e x p l a i n how t h e y were made w i t h i n t h e W o r k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee m e e t i n g s . S a d l y , t h e l a c k of P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r r e p r e s e n t a t i o n i n Leaving Silence p o i n t s t o our own p r e j u d i c e and t o our c o m p l i c i t y i n r e i n f o r c i n g o p p r e s s i v e p r a c t i c e s . I n an e s s a y e n t i t l e d " ' A s i a n P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r ' : I s s u e s o f R e p r e s e n t a t i o n and R e s p o n s i b i l i t y , " J . K e h a u l a n i Kauanui and J u H u i ("Judy") Han, as community a c t i v i s t s i n A s i a n A m e r i c a n queer movements, q u e s t i o n t h e p o l i t i c s o f e x c l u s i o n : "By s t o p p i n g s h o r t of t r u l y a c k n o w l e d g i n g t h e h e t e r o g e n e i t y and d i v e r s i t y of t h e groups of p e o p l e 'API' c l a i m s t o r e p r e s e n t and i n c l u d e , we r e p l i c a t e t h e r e l a t i o n s h i p between t h e 'dominant' and t h e ' m i n o r i t y ' " (Lim-Hing 1994, 377-79). We n e i t h e r c r e a t e d n o r a c t i v e l y p u r s u e d a l l i a n c e s w i t h P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r c o m m u nities, and t h i s was l a r g e l y because, as happens w i t h many such p r o j e c t s , most c o n t a c t s were e s t a b l i s h e d t h r o u g h word of mouth and t h r o u g h t h e p e r s o n a l and/or p r o f e s s i o n a l r e l a t i o n s h i p s of p r o j e c t o r g a n i z e r s . T h i s i s n o t t o s a y t h a t a p r o j e c t can o n l y o p e r a t e w i t h i n t h e a l r e a d y - e s t a b l i s h e d n e t w o r k s of i t s o r g a n i z e r s , b u t , as i n t h e c a s e of Leaving Silence, i t o f t e n comes down t o t h i s . Thus i t w o u l d be b o t h more a p p r o p r i a t e and more a c c u r a t e t o s a y t h a t t h i s i s a queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n community p r o j e c t , and, from t h i s p o i n t on, t h i s i s how I s h a l l r e f e r t o i t . Leaving Silence's o m i s s i o n of P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r s w i l l s t a n d as a r e m i n d e r o f our i n s e n s i t i v i t y and i r r e s p o n s i b i l i t y as community a c t i v i s t s . W i t h r e g a r d t o o u r g e n e r a l o m i s s i o n o f t h e t r a n s g e n d e r e d , t h e one t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n we i n t e r v i e w e d wanted h e r n a r r a t i v e t o be accompanied by an i l l u s t r a t i o n o f t h e sun r a t h e r t h a n by a p h o t o g r a p h . A t t h e t i m e of t h e i n t e r v i e w , she was v e r y c o n c e r n e d about b e i n g known as a m a l e - t o - f e m a l e t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n and f e a r e d f o r h e r s a f e t y . We of c o u r s e c o m p l i e d w i t h h e r w i s h e s , b u t t h i s drew c r i t i c i s m when t h e Queering the Pacific Northwest 13 e x h i b i t was d i s p l a y e d i n P o r t l a n d , Oregon. One t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n w r o t e a l e t t e r t o A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r L e s b i a n s and Gays t o argue t h a t we l a c k e d t h e commitment t o f i n d a t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n who was w i l l i n g t o be pho t o g r a p h e d . That l a c k o f commitment r e i n f o r c e s t h e shame and i n t e r n a l i s e d t r a n s p h o b i a so many t r a n s p e o p l e s u f f e r from, r e i n f o r c e s t h e message t h a t t r a n s y o u t h l o o k i n g f o r r o l e models s h o u l d l o o k o u t s i d e t h e queer community, and r e i n f o r c e s my s u s p i c i o n t h a t a l l t o o o f t e n much o f what p a s s e s f o r " i n c l u s i o n " i s mere l i p -s e r v i c e . ( J u s t Out, 6 June 1997) T h i s c r i t i c i s m i s j u s t i f i e d . However i n f a c t b e c a u s e o f our f a i l u r e , I would l i k e t o r e i t e r a t e t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f i n c l u d i n g b o t h m a l e - t o - f e m a l e and f e m a l e - t o - m a l e t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n s i n f u t u r e p r o j e c t s . T h i s seeming l a c k of commitment t o t h e t r a n s g e n d e r e d community i s p a r t l y due t o an absence o f c o a l i t i o n - b u i l d i n g between l e s b i a n and gay groups and t r a n s g e n d e r e d o r g a n i z a t i o n s . O n l y r e c e n t l y has t h e s u b j e c t o f t r a n s g e n d e r been i n c l u d e d i n A s i a n l e s b i a n and b i s e x u a l c o n f e r e n c e s (such as t h e A s i a n P a c i f i c L e s b i a n B i s e x u a l Network 1998 c o n f e r e n c e i n Los A n g e l e s ) . The i n c l u s i o n o f t r a n s g e n d e r e d i n d i v i d u a l s was a l s o a c o n t e s t e d i s s u e i n f e m i n i s t o r g a n i z i n g among women's com m u n i t i e s . I b e l i e v e t h a t some o f t h e d i f f i c u l t i e s women's communities have w i t h r e g a r d t o a c c e p t i n g t h e t r a n s g e n d e r e d community comes from a b i o l o g i c a l d e t e r m i n i s t i c p o i n t o f v i e w . 1 0 P e r s o n a l l y , I f i n d i t h i g h l y p r o b l e m a t i c when arguments f o r t h e e x c l u s i o n o f t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n s a r e f o c u s e d on th e b i o l o g i c a l a s p e c t s o f t r a n s g e n d e r i s m . I n s t e a d o f l o o k i n g a t how o p p r e s s i o n permeates t h e gender spectrum, t h e s e p o s i t i o n s i g n o r e t h e r e a l i t y o f v i o l e n c e a g a i n s t t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n s . S i n c e most 1 0 Two prevalent issues in women's communities are male privilege and same-sex desire. The male privilege concern generally crops up with both female-to-male and male-to-female individuals. In the case of female-to-male transition, it is often thought that the individual can immediately assume a male identity and, therefore, be rid of oppression. In the case of male-to-female transition, it is often believed that the individual lived as a male person before and, therefore, lacks an understanding of what it is to be a woman. Queering the Pacific Northwest 14 t r a n s g e n d e r e d i n d i v i d u a l s a r e i n ma l e - f e m a l e r e l a t i o n s h i p s , t h e m a t t e r of same-sex d e s i r e becomes v e r y complex. Sex ass i g n m e n t s u r g e r y a l t e r s t h e s i m p l e p i c t u r e o f a woman f a l l i n g i n l o v e w i t h a n o t h e r woman. We a r e f a c e d w i t h t h e c h a l l e n g e of f a c i n g new d e f i n i t i o n s o f womanhood. I n t a k i n g a p r o g r e s s i v e s t e p towards i n c l u d i n g t r a n s g e n d e r e d v o i c e s , t h e o r g a n i z e r s o f t h e B u i l d i n g Bridges.: Spanning Our P a s t Toward Our F u t u r e c o n f e r e n c e r e c o g n i z e d t h e need t o v i e w o p p r e s s i o n a c r o s s d i f f e r e n t c o n s t r u c t i o n s o f gender i d e n t i t y . L a y i n g t h e groundwork f o r t h i s k i n d of c o a l i t i o n - b u i l d i n g t a k e s a s i g n i f i c a n t p e r i o d o f t i m e -- much more th a n was g r a n t e d by t h e t i m e l i n e o f Leaving Silence. T r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n s a r e b e g i n n i n g t o be r e c o g n i z e d i n t h e A s i a n l e s b i a n movement, as i s e v i d e n c e d by t h e i r p r e s e n c e i n t h e l a s t A s i a n P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r L e s b i a n and B i s e x u a l Network C o n f e r e n c e h e l d i n June 1998 a t t h e U n i v e r s i t y o f C a l i f o r n i a , Los A n g e l e s . S l o w l y , we a r e w o r k i n g towards i n c l u d i n g t r a n s g e n d e r i s m as p a r t o f our a n a l y s i s o f r a c e and s e x u a l i t y . I f we r e c o g n i s e Leaving Silence as a queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n p r o j e c t , t h e n we need t o a d d r e s s t h e e s s e n t i a l i s m t h a t t h i s i n v o l v e s . Commenting on t h e s o c i a l l y c o n s t r u c t e d c a t e g o r y o f " A s i a n A m e r i c a n , " and d r a w i n g upon p o s t c o l o n i a l t h e o r i s t G a y a t r i C h a k r a v o r t y S p i v a k ' s c o n c e p t of " s t r a t e g i c e s s e n t i a l i s m , " c u l t u r a l c r i t i c L i s a Lowe reminds us t h a t " A s i a n A m e r i c a n " can be us e d s t r a t e g i c a l l y " f o r t h e p u r p o s e o f c o n t e s t i n g and d i s r u p t i n g t h e d i s c o u r s e s t h a t e x c l u d e A s i a n A m e r i c a n s . " 1 1 What S p i v a k i s r e f e r r i n g t o w i t h t h e p h r a s e " s t r a t e g i c e s s e n t i a l i s m " i s t h e way i n w h i c h terms such as " A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r " can be i n s e r t e d i n t o p u b l i c and p o l i t i c a l d i s c o u r s e s when l e a s t e x p e c t e d i n o r d e r t o d i s r u p t t h e dominant d i s c o u r s e . F o r example, a c c o r d i n g t o t h e Census 2 000 d a t a t h e A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r p o p u l a t i o n i n t h e S t a t e o f C a l i f o r n i a was e s t i m a t e d a t 13 p e r c e n t of t h e n a t i o n ' s p o p u l a t i o n . However, i n t h e C i t y o f San F r a n c i s c o , C a l i f o r n i a , 1 1 Lisa Lowe, Immigrant Acts (Durham: Duke University Press, 1996), 82-83. Queering the Pacific Northwest 15 t h e A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r p o p u l a t i o n was e s t i m a t e d a t 30.7 p e r c e n t of t h e c i t y ' s p o p u l a t i o n . C o n s e q u e n t l y , t h e c a t e g o r y o f " A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r " c o u l d be us e d s t r a t e g i c a l l y t o demand t h a t p o l i c y makers o f f e r s o c i a l s e r v i c e s and programs t a r g e t e d towards t h i s p a r t i c u l a r p o p u l a t i o n . Lowe goes on t o e x p l a i n t h a t , by t h e same t o k e n , t h e t e r m " A s i a n A m e r i c a n " can c h a l l e n g e i t s own gaps and l a c u n a e . F o r example, as Leaving Silence s u g g e s t s , a l t h o u g h i t i s n o t g e n e r a l l y r e c o g n i z e d , t h e te r m A s i a n A m e r i c a n i n c l u d e s gays, l e s b i a n s , b i s e x u a l s , and t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e o p l e from a d i v e r s e number of g e o g r a p h i c a l r e g i o n s , n a t i o n a l i t i e s , g e n e r a t i o n s , and s o c i a l c l a s s e s . I f we a l i g n o u r queer-s e l v e s w i t h o ur i d e n t i t y as A s i a n A m e r i c a n s , t h e n we a r e p r o b l e m a t i z i n g t h e t e r m by i n s i s t i n g t h a t i t t a k e i n t o a c c o u n t queer s e x u a l i t y . Through our c o n s i s t e n t q u e s t i o n i n g o f t h e term " A s i a n A m e r i c a n " and our i n s i s t e n c e t h a t i t i n c o r p o r a t e q u e e r n e s s we a r e s u b v e r t i n g i t , f o r c i n g i t t o i n c l u d e p r e v i o u s l y d i s p l a c e d p o p u l a t i o n s . I n t e r e s t i n g l y , t h e e x h i b i t o r g a n i z e r s i n v i t e d p e o p l e n o t o n l y from t h e " o r d i n a r y " A s i a n c o u n t r i e s , b u t a l s o from p l a c e s l i k e West A s i a (commonly r e f e r r e d t o as I r a n ) . Bookda G h e i s a r v o i c e d how she f e l t about i d e n t i f y i n g as West A s i a n : My e t h n i c i t y i s so m e t h i n g t h a t I've o n l y had t o f a c e i n t h i s c o u n t r y . I ' v e o n l y e v e r h e a r d t h e te r m M i d d l e E a s t e r n when I moved h e r e . I was r a i s e d i n I r a n as a c h i l d l e a r n i n g t h a t I was A s i a n , West A s i a n . We were i n th e A s i a n O lympic games, A s i a n s o c c e r tournaments, A s i a n w h a t e v e r ... we were A s i a n . So e v e r y t h i n g I r e l a t e d t o was [ c o n c e r n e d w i t h ] b e i n g an A s i a n p e r s o n g r o w i n g up i n th e c o n t i n e n t o f A s i a ... By t h e t i m e I was tw e n t y I was v e r y p o l i t i c a l l y a c t i v e , and by t h e n I c o u l d u n d e r s t a n d how Europeans r e l a t e d t o us. We're i n t h e m i d d l e o f t h e E a s t i n r e l a t i o n t o Europe. So t h e n I've been M i d d l e E a s t e r n , and I've n e v e r , e v e r l i k e d t h a t term. And I know r i g h t now on t h e E a s t C o a s t i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s , and i n London, and i n P a r i s , where t h e r e a r e more p o l i t i c a l l y o r g a n i z e d s o - c a l l e d M i d d l e E a s t e r n c o m m u n ities, we a r e r e a l l y t r y i n g t o g e t our own communities t o s t o p u s i n g t h a t t e r m and t o c o n t i n u e t o r e f e r t o o u r s e l v e s as West A s i a n . By i n c l u d i n g Bookda's n a r r a t i v e i n t h e e x h i b i t t h e p r o j e c t Queering the Pacific Northwest 16 o r g a n i z e r s manage t o d e m o n s t r a t e t h e s o c i a l l y c o n s t r u c t e d n a t u r e o f t h e term " A s i a n A m e r i c a n , " w h i c h i s c l e a r l y c a p a b l e o f b e i n g a d a p t e d t o accommodate p o l i t i c a l l y a p p r o p r i a t e d e f i n i t i o n s . The E x h i b i t as a P o l i t i c a l E n t i t y What does v i s i b i l i t y mean? What does i t mean t o queer A s i a n s and h e t e r o s e x u a l A s i a n s , t o A s i a n i m m i g r a n t s and t o P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r s , t o n o n - A s i a n s i n queer communities, and t o que e r s from m a r g i n a l i z e d r a c i a l b a c k g rounds? W i t h i n t h e s e c o n t e x t s , v i s i b i l i t y i s a c r y f o r s o c i a l j u s t i c e and, as such, i t i s some t h i n g t h a t t h r e a t e n s t h e p r i v i l e g e d and t h e p o w e r f u l . Through t h e use of o r a l n a r r a t i v e s t r a n s c r i b e d from t h e members of queer A s i a n communities, a l o n g w i t h b l a c k - a n d - w h i t e p h o t o p o r t r a i t s and a r t i s t i c images, Leaving Silence c o n s t i t u t e s a c l e a r p o l i t i c a l s t a t e m e n t -- one t h a t i n s i s t s upon i n s e r t i n g queer A s i a n - n e s s i n t o p u b l i c d i s c o u r s e . F o r l e s b i a n s , gays, and t h e t r a n s g e n d e r e d , o f c o u r s e , coming out means becoming v i s i b l e . I t means s t e e l i n g o u r s e l v e s t o b e i n g c h a l l e n g e d a g a i n and a g a i n , b o t h by t h o s e who c a r e about us and by t h o s e who do n o t . Not s u r p r i s i n g l y , i n much of t h e l i t e r a t u r e on gay and l e s b i a n r i g h t s , coming out i s t h e f i r s t i s s u e t o be d i s c u s s e d (e.g., Oikawa, F a l c o n e r , E l w i n , and D e c t e r 1993; Oikawa, F a l c o n e r , and D e c t e r 1994; T r u j i l l o 1991). The a c t of coming o u t , i n v o l v i n g , as i t does, a d e f i n i t i v e move away from n o r m a t i v e h e t e r o s e x u a l i t y , i s a p o l i t i c a l s t a t e m e n t p a r e x c e l l e n c e . The common a s s u m p t i o n o f h e t e r o - n o r m a t i v i t y w i t h i n A s i a n A m e r i c a n communities stems from r a c i a l d i s c r i m i n a t i o n and r a c i s t p r a c t i c e s w i t h i n N o r t h A m e r i c a i n g e n e r a l . H i s t o r i c a l e x c l u s i o n a c t s and Am e r i c a n i m p e r i a l i s m i n A s i a s e t t h e s t a g e f o r t h e l o n g p r o c e s s o f r a c i a l i z a t i o n w i t h i n i m m i g r a n t and r e f u g e e communities l i v i n g i n N o r t h A m e r i c a . The Congress p a s s e d C h i n e s e e x c l u s i o n a c t s e v e r y two y e a r s d u r i n g t h e p e r i o d between 1882 and 1888. These a c t s p r o h i b i t e d C h i n e s e l a b o u r e r s , s h o u l d Queering the Pacific Northwest 17 t h e y go back t o C h i n a t o v i s i t f r i e n d s and f a m i l y , from r e t u r n i n g t o t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s . The I m m i g r a t i o n A c t , 1917, p r o h i b i t e d p e o p l e from S o u t h e a s t A s i a and t h e i s l a n d s of t h e I n d i a n and P a c i f i c Oceans from e n t e r i n g t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s . The I m m i g r a t i o n A c t , 1924, p r o h i b i t e d J a p a nese p e o p l e f r o m e n t e r i n g t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s . I m m i g r a t i o n f r o m K o r e a was n o t a c o n c e r n f o r t h e US government d u r i n g t h i s t i m e because K o r e a was o c c u p i e d by Japan, w h i c h was e f f e c t i v e l y c o n t r o l l i n g t h e movements of Korean p e o p l e . P r i o r t o 1934 F i l i p i n o s and F i l i p i n a s were c a t e g o r i z e d as "wards" as t h e P h i l i p p i n e s was an A m e r i c a n c o l o n y . A f t e r t h e p a s s i n g of t h e T y d i n g s - M c D u f f i e A c t , 1934, F i l i p i n o s and F i l i p i n a s were r e c a t e g o r i z e d as " a l i e n s . " Some o f t h e s e a c t s were a r e s p o n s e t o t h e economic need f o r cheap l a b o u r . Lowe i d e n t i f i e s two p e r i o d s d u r i n g w h i c h cheap l a b o u r was u r g e n t l y needed by t h e c a p i t a l i s t economy: t h e p e r i o d from 1850 t o t h e Second W o r l d War, and t h e p e r i o d from t h e Second W o r l d War t o t h e p r e s e n t . I n t h e e a r l i e r p e r i o d , C h i n e s e , F i l i p i n o , and J a p a n e s e l a b o u r e r s p l a y e d a major r o l e i n l a y i n g down r a i l t r a c k s , w o r k i n g on s u g a r c a n e p l a n t a t i o n s , and w o r k i n g i n garment f a c t o r i e s . The e x c l u s i o n a c t s t h e n s e r v e d as a way o f c o n t r o l l i n g i m m i g r a t i o n numbers, m o n i t o r i n g t h e a c c u m u l a t i o n of c a p i t a l , and p r e v e n t i n g t h e l a b o u r e r s from b u i l d i n g f a m i l i e s . A n t i - m i s c e g e n a t i o n laws were e n a c t e d f o r t h e same r e a s o n s . T h i s e a r l y p r a c t i c e of e x p l o i t a t i o n c o n t i n u e s i n t o t h e p r e s e n t , as d e m o n s t r a t e d i n t h e p r e s e n c e of U S - s u p p o r t e d A s i a n and L a t i n A m e r i c a n e x p o r t p r o c e s s i n g zones. And, as A m e r i c a n i m p e r i a l i s m c o n t i n u e s on a g l o b a l s c a l e , A s i a n and L a t i n o i mmigrant women c o n t i n u e t o work i n low-wage i n d u s t r i e s i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s . The o n g o i n g e x p l o i t a t i o n o f p e o p l e of c o l o u r , w h i c h f u e l s t h e A m e r i c a n c a p i t a l i s t economy and i t s m u l t i n a t i o n a l g l o b a l c o r p o r a t i o n s , f u r t h e r a c c e n t u a t e s t h e need f o r communities made up of p e o p l e of c o l o u r t o u n i t e and t o f i g h t f o r j u s t i c e (Lowe 1996, 8-17). I n o r d e r t o p r o t e c t t h e m s e l v e s f r o m o p p r e s s i v e p r a c t i c e s , e t h n i c communities c a r e f u l l y p a s s e d on c u l t u r a l Queering the Pacific Northwest 18 and s o c i a l t r a d i t i o n s . I f t h e s e t r a d i t i o n s were t r a n s l a t e d i n t o t h e c o n t e x t o f f a m i l i a l n e t w o r k s , t h e n i t must be r e c o g n i z e d t h a t h e t e r o s e x u a l i t y was s e t up as a s t a n d a r d -- as a measure o f l o y a l t y t o c u l t u r e . And so, w i t h i n t h e l a r g e r e t h n o c u l t u r a l c o m m u n i t i e s , t h e i n s i s t e n c e upon v i s i b i l i t y by queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s i s p e r c e i v e d as a t h r e a t , a b e t r a y a l . Queer A s i a n Americans a r e seen t o be s e l f i s h l y p u t t i n g t h e i r i n d i v i d u a l agendas b e f o r e t h o s e o f t h e i r c o l l e c t i v e ( r e a d h e t e r o s e x u a l ) c o m m u n i t i e s , and d r a w i n g more n e g a t i v e a s s e s s m e n t s of t h e m s e l v e s . W i t h i n t h e s e l a r g e r c o m m u nities, t h e i r v i s i b i l i t y i s an embarrassment, an i r r i t a n t , an a f f r o n t . Homophobia and r a c i s m a r e p e r v a s i v e t h r o u g h o u t N o r t h A m e r i c a n s o c i e t y , and queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n v i s i b i l i t y c h a l l e n g e s i t , d i s r u p t s i t , q u e s t i o n s i t . The knowledge p r o d u c e d t h r o u g h a s s e m b l i n g and e x h i b i t i n g Leaving Silence speaks t o t h e e x p e r i e n c e s o f d i s c r i m i n a t i o n . Indeed, i t was t h r o u g h " l e a v i n g s i l e n c e " t h a t t h e o r g a n i z e r s were a b l e t o denounce t h e s i l e n c e t h a t has f o r so l o n g been imposed upon queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s . A c c o r d i n g t o Chandra T a l p a d e Mohanty, "the s t r u g g l e o v e r r e p r e s e n t a t i o n i s a l w a y s a s t r u g g l e o v e r knowledge" (Roman and E y r e 1997, x v i ) . I n a r g u i n g f o r t h e e x i s t e n c e o f a queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n e x h i b i t , t h e o r g a n i z e r s h e l p e d t o l e g i t i m i z e queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s c h o l a r s h i p . By j u s t i f y i n g t h e need f o r a p u b l i c e x h i b i t , t h e o r g a n i z e r s c h a l l e n g e d t h e h e t e r o - n o r m a t i v i t y i n p u b l i c s p a c e s . F i n a l l y , t h e n a r r a t i v e s on t h e e x h i b i t p a n e l s r e p r e s e n t queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n e x p e r i e n c e s and p l a c e them s q u a r e l y w i t h i n t h e r e a l m o f p u b l i c knowledge. P o l i t i c a l A c t i v i s m : P a s t and P r e s e n t Sometimes I c a t c h m y s e l f t a k i n g t h e a v a i l a b i l i t y o f A s i a n l e s b i a n r e s o u r c e s f o r g r a n t e d . U n l i k e t h e e a r l i e r days o f t h e N o r t h A m e r i c a n gay movements, now t h e r e i s a s t r o n g e r p r e s e n c e o f queer A s i a n groups -- a t l e a s t i n u r b a n c e n t r e s . A s i a n A m e r i c a n s have l e a r n e d t o e x p e c t more from Queering the Pacific Northwest 19 t h e P r i d e p a r a d e s and gay and l e s b i a n f i l m f e s t i v a l s . Through advances i n communication t e c h n o l o g i e s , i t has become e a s i e r t o l o c a t e our queer A s i a n s i s t e r s and b r o t h e r s . Y e t t h e r e a r e t i m e s when t h e r e i s no acknowledgement f o r t h o s e who made a l l t h i s p o s s i b l e , and t h e r e i s no a c c o u n t of how much h i s t o r y has a l r e a d y been f o r g o t t e n . V a r i o u s a n t h o l o g i e s have h e l p e d me t o l e a r n more about t h e h i s t o r y of t h e N o r t h A m e r i c a n A s i a n l e s b i a n movements. E s s a y s i n a n t h o l o g i e s s u c h as Piece of My Heart: A Lesbian of Colour Anthology; The Very Inside: An Anthology of Writing by Asian and P a c i f i c Islander Lesbian and Bisexual Women; and Asian American S e x u a l i t i e s : Dimensions of the Gay and Lesbian Experience have c o n t r i b u t e d t o t h e h i s t o r y and knowledge of community o r g a n i z i n g i n N o r t h A m e r i c a n A s i a n l e s b i a n c o m m u n i t i e s . I n h e r e s s a y " S a f e r Sex i n S a n t a C r u z , " Mona Oikawa, a S a n s e i ( t h i r d - g e n e r a t i o n J a p a n e s e Canadian) who founded A s i a n L e s b i a n s o f T o r o n t o , d i s c u s s e d t h e d i f f i c u l t i e s o f r a i s i n g s a f e r s e x i s s u e s a t t h e F i r s t N a t i o n a l A s i a n / P a c i f i c a L e s b i a n Network r e t r e a t i n S a n t a C r u z , C a l i f o r n i a , i n 1989 ( S i l v e r a 1991, 155-9) . Oikawa b r o u g h t up a common myth -- t h a t l e s b i a n s a r e n o t i n f e c t e d w i t h HIV/AIDS -- and s a i d t h a t i t was h e r r e a s o n f o r a t t e n d i n g a s a f e r s e x workshop a t t h e r e t r e a t . I n t h e c u r r e n t f i e l d o f HIV/AIDS, t h e d i s c u s s i o n o f s a f e r l e s b i a n s e x s t i l l does n o t t a k e p l a c e as o f t e n as i t s h o u l d . One of t h e major r e a s o n s f o r t h i s i s t h e l a c k of r e s e a r c h on l e s b i a n h e a l t h i s s u e s . S i m i l a r l y , t h e s e a r c h f o r f a m i l y a c c e p t a n c e among que e r s has been an o n g o i n g s t r u g g l e t h r o u g h g e n e r a t i o n s of gay a c t i v i s m . I n a 1991 e s s a y , Susan Chen, a p u b l i c h e a l t h w o r k e r and an A s i a n l e s b i a n a c t i v i s t , d e s c r i b e d t h e p a i n f u l p r o c e s s of coming out t o h e r Taiwanese C h i n e s e p a r e n t s (Lim-Hing 1994, 79-84) . Her p a r e n t s e x p e c t e d Chen t o g e t a good j o b and n o t become i n v o l v e d w i t h p o l i t i c a l a c t i v i t i e s . She f e l t t h e p a i n f u l c o n f l i c t o f w a n t i n g b o t h t o p l e a s e h e r p a r e n t s and t o be an a c t i v i s t . I n v e r b a l i z i n g h e r coming-out p r o c e s s , Chen a l l o w e d t h e Queering the Pacific Northwest 20 r e a d e r t o f e e l t h a t she o r he was n o t a l o n e i n t h e s t r u g g l e t o come out as queer and A s i a n A m e r i c a n . Her a g o n i z i n g e x p e r i e n c e i s s h a r e d by many queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s t h r o u g h l e t t e r s and e s s a y s p u b l i s h e d i n n e w s l e t t e r s and a n t h o l o g i e s . The p e r s i s t e n c e o f t h e s e i s s u e s i l l u s t r a t e s a demand f o r p u b l i c awareness o f queer s e x u a l i t y and f o r an i n c r e a s e d u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f homophobia as m a n i f e s t e d i n r e a l l i v e s . To me, a c t i v i s m i s l i k e a s l o w r u s h : i t forms u n c o n s c i o u s l y , r e m a i n i n g s t e a d f a s t l y i n t h e background, u n t i l s u d d e n l y i t gushes r i g h t t h r o u g h me, p u s h i n g me towards t h e a c t of s p e a k i n g up. I t i s w i t h t h i s k i n d o f emotion t h a t I w r o t e t h e s e pages. Y e t t h i s e m o t i o n has been tempered w i t h c a r e f u l c a l c u l a t i o n s and much r e s e a r c h , as w i l l become e v i d e n t i n C h a p t e r 2, where I p r e s e n t a l i t e r a t u r e r e v i e w of e x i s t i n g s c h o l a r s h i p . Queering the Pacific Northwest 21 CHAPTER 2: FINDING THE QUEER SUBJECT My mother t e l l s me that, long into the night, I used to t e l l s t o r i e s using the fingers on both of my hands, naming each finger and making them a l l t a l k to each other. And t h i s , I suppose, was my f i r s t attempt at c o a l i t i o n building. -- D e n i s e Tang I n a t t e m p t i n g t o r e v i e w t h e l i t e r a t u r e on queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s , I soon f o u n d t h a t I was g o i n g t o have t o t a k e an i n t e r d i s c i p l i n a r y a p p r o a c h t o my work. The r e a s o n f o r t h i s i s s i m p l y t h a t t h e r e i s so l i t t l e s c h o l a r s h i p d i r e c t l y r e l a t e d t o t h i s group o f p e o p l e . I b e g i n w i t h an o v e r v i e w of A s i a n A m e r i c a n s o c i a l movements and how t h e y c o n t r i b u t e t o t h e f o r m a t i o n of A s i a n A m e r i c a n i d e n t i t i e s . Then I p r o c e e d w i t h a s u r v e y of f i c t i o n a l works w r i t t e n by a c t i v i s t s and c u l t u r a l w o r k e r s , f o l l o w e d by a d i s c u s s i o n on f e m i n i s t l i t e r a t u r e . Towards t h e end of t h e c h a p t e r , I t u r n b r i e f l y t o t h e s u b j e c t of c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s and media r e p r e s e n t a t i o n . I r e t u r n t o t h e documents c o l l e c t e d d u r i n g my p o s i t i o n as t h e P r o j e c t C o o r d i n a t o r as a c l o s i n g r o u n d f o r t h i s l i t e r a t u r e r e v i e w . As n o t e d i n t h e i n t r o d u c t i o n t o Queer in Asian America, D a v i d L. Eng and A l i c e Y. Horn (1998) s u g g e s t t h a t A s i a n A m e r i c a n s t u d i e s , as an academic d i s c i p l i n e , b u i l t upon t h e s o c i a l a c t i v i s m and p o l i t i c a l movements of t h e l a t e 1960s and 1970s. The A s i a n A m e r i c a n movements, f e m i n i s m , and gay l i b e r a t i o n e s t a b l i s h e d t h e need f o r f u r t h e r d i s c u s s i o n of t h e i n t e r s e c t i o n s of r a c i a l i z e d , gendered, and economic c a t e g o r i e s w i t h i n an A m e r i c a n c o n t e x t . F o r example, i n t h e e a r l y 1970s G i l Mangaoan, a w r i t e r and l o n g - t i m e o r g a n i z e r f o r gay, F i l i p i n o , m i n o r i t y n o n - p r o f i t o r g a n i z a t i o n s , formed a s t u d y group c o n s i s t i n g of s t u d e n t s from v a r i o u s e d u c a t i o n a l i n s t i t u t i o n s . The p u r p o s e of t h i s group was t o l e a r n t h e h i s t o r i e s o f F i l i p i n o s i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s (Leong 1996, 101-1 1 ) . G a r y Y. O k i h i r o , a s c h o l a r i n i n t e r n a t i o n a l and p u b l i c a f f a i r s , e x p l a i n e d t h a t t h e e a r l y v i s i o n of e t h n i c s t u d i e s was t o d e v e l o p a more i n c l u s i v e h i s t o r y -- one t h a t t o o k i n t o a c c o u n t t h e h i s t o r i e s of N a t i v e Queering the Pacific Northwest 22 Ame r i c a n s , A f r i c a n s , L a t i n o s , and A s i a n s ( O k i h i r o 1994, 150-1) . I n s p i r e d by t h e c i v i l r i g h t s movement, t h e a n t i - V i e t n a m War movement, t h e r emoval o f Am e r i c a n m i l i t a r y b a s e s i n A s i a , and n a t i o n a l l i b e r a t i o n movements i n T h i r d W o r l d c o u n t r i e s , t h e A s i a n A m e r i c a n movement began i n i n n e r - c i t y e t h n i c e n c l a v e s , c o l l e g e campuses, and r u r a l f a r m l a n d s . I n 1979, s i x C h i n e s e and C h i n e s e Korean women w r i t e r s (Nancy Horn, Genny Lim, Canyon Sam, K i t t y T s u i , N e l l i e Wong, and M e r l e Woo) formed Unbound F e e t (Ho, A n t o n i o , F u j i n o , and Y i p 2000, 235-42) . T h i s f e m i n i s t c o l l e c t i v e w r o t e p o e t r y and p r o s e and p e r f o r m e d i n v a r i o u s venues ( p r i m a r i l y i n c i t i e s a l o n g t h e West C o a s t ) . T h e i r works a d d r e s s e d t h e i s s u e s o f r a c i s m , s e x i s m , homophobia, and o t h e r forms o f d i s c r i m i n a t i o n . A l s o s i g n i f i c a n t a r o u n d t h i s t i m e p e r i o d was t h e way i n w h i c h t h e women's movement o r g a n i z e d a r o u n d v i o l e n c e a g a i n s t women. A s i a n A m e r i c a n f e m i n i s t s were w o r k i n g h a n d - i n - h a n d w i t h w h i t e f e m i n i s t s t o l o c a t e s h e l t e r s and s t a f f r a p e c r i s i s t e l e p h o n e l i n e s (Shah 1997, 63-6 ) . On t h e gay f r o n t , t h e 1969 S t o n e w a l l r i o t s s p a r k e d i n t e r e s t i n e x p l o r i n g t h e i n t e r c o n n e c t e d n e s s o f r a c e and s e x u a l i t y . 1 2 A l t h o u g h i t was n o t o f t e n m e n t i o n e d i n m a i n s t r e a m a c c o u n t s o f t h e r i o t s , a number o f L a t i n o and A f r i c a n A m e r i c a n d r a g queens were a c t i v e i n community o r g a n i z i n g d u r i n g t h i s p e r i o d . I n a s s e s s i n g t h e s e d i f f e r e n t a r e a s o f s o c i a l a c t i v i s m A s i a n A m e r i c a n s t u d i e s s c h o l a r s were a b l e t o make t h e c o n n e c t i o n among r a c i s m , s e x i s m , c l a s s i s m , and homophobia and t o see how t h e s e forms o f o p p r e s s i o n a f f e c t e d (and, s a d l y , c o n t i n u e t o a f f e c t ) t h e l i v e s o f A s i a n A m e r i c a n s . Works o f t h e o r y d e v o t e d t o A s i a n A m e r i c a n i d e n t i t i e s emerged i n th e 1990s and, among o t h e r t h i n g s , began a s k i n g q u e s t i o n s r e l a t i n g t o gender s t u d i e s . P u b l i s h e d i n t h e 1994 i s s u e o f Amerasia Journal, s o c i o l o g i s t Dana Y. T a k a g i ' s e s s a y -- "Maiden Voyage: E x c u r s i o n i n t o 1 2 During the summer months of 1969, the New York Police Department conducted multiple raids on gay bars, African American nightclubs and Latino bars. It was the raid on Stonewall Inn that mobilized young gay men, butch lesbians and drag queens to speak up against police brutality. Queering the Pacific Northwest 23 Sexuality and Identity P o l i t i c s i n Asian America" -- encouraged Asian American studies scholars to include queer s e x u a l i t y i n t h e i r d i s c i p l i n e ' s r h e t o r i c . At the same time, Takagi warns us against the simple p r a c t i c e of too simply d e f i n i n g a lesbian and including t h i s category i n our discussions of Asian American studies; instead, she urges us to begin our gender analysis from a p l u r a l i t y of sexual i d e n t i t i e s and to avoid the never-ending exercise of attempting to p r e c i s e l y define one's sexual p r a c t i c e . In using a p l u r a l i s t i c term such as " s e x u a l i t i e s , " we are attempting to be i n c l u s i v e i n our approach to sexual p r a c t i c e . L i s a Lowe's pioneering book, Immigrant Acts, sheds l i g h t on how masculinity played a part i n determining one's c i t i z e n s h i p i n the United States. The attainment of c i t i z e n s h i p i s a c r u c i a l process because a nation-state i s defined by i t s c i t i z e n s . Therefore, i n determining c i t i z e n s h i p , the p r i n c i p l e s of heterosexuality and of desire for a nuclear family had to be upheld by applicants. Hence, p r i o r to the Second World War, the d e l i b e r a t e exclusion of Asians from multiple l e g a l discourses resulted i n t h e i r assignment to a less-than-masculine i d e n t i t y . The term "less-than-masculine i d e n t i t y , " not s u r p r i s i n g l y , frequently translates into a deviant sexual i d e n t i t y commonly understood as homosexuality. An appreciation of t h i s a s s e r tion of gender into Asian American studies constitutes the f i r s t step towards understanding queer Asian American s e x u a l i t i e s . Lesbian and gay studies have not always taken i n t o account queer Asian Americans and other lesbians and gays of colour. As a r e s u l t , queer Asian Americans have turned to l i t e r a t u r e -- to poetry, prose, and l i t e r a r y anthologies -- i n an attempt to make themselves v i s i b l e . This i s not only true of queer Asian Americans, but also of queer Asian Canadians. In p a r t i c u l a r , Asian lesbian and bisexual women writers such as L a r i s s a L a i , C. Allyson Lee, Shani Mootoo, Sky Lee, and, more recently, R i t a Wong are avid contributors to poetry anthologies and are Queering the Pacific Northwest 24 a u t h o r s o f w e l l r e c e i v e d n o v e l s . I n t h e poem " f o r a n n i e , " R i t a Wong t a k e s t h e s t o r y o f a C h i n e s e woman named A n n i e (who r a n away from h e r ' owner i n Idaho i n o r d e r t o marry h e r l o v e r ) and uses i t t o examine h e r s e l f as an A s i a n woman l i v i n g i n N o r t h A m e r i c a . i am n o t a n n i e , i am o f a n n i e & i want i t back, my eyes, my l i p s , my f i n g e r s , my b r e a s t s , my r u m b l i n g stomach, a l l mine, my b l o o d t h u n d e r i n g t o d e a f e n an army, j a b of my i n s i s t e n t elbow, my p u l s e b e a t s d e f i a n c e : i am i am. (Wong 1998, 23) As h e r d e f i a n t s e l f moves t h r o u g h t h e poem's v e r s e s , she u n i t e s w i t h a s y m b o l i c a n n i e , t h e one t h a t g o t away, she was almond g r a c e , s a l t y t r e a s u r e , we t a l k e d r i v e r s , waves & oceans i n t o t h e n i g h t , h e r s t r o n g b l a c k h a i r & mine t a n g l i n g i n t o n e t s t o c a t c h s t o r i e s , my mouth w a t e r s when i a l l o w m y s e l f t o remember h e r c a s s i a l i l t e d l a u g h , i n a n o t h e r l i f e t i m e we c o u l d have b u i l t v i l l a g e s o f women, t o d a y she l i v e s m o untains, r i v e r s , t a b o o s away, c l e n c h & s h i v e r , c l e n c h & s h i v e r i n t o s i l e n c e , t h e t a s t e o f h e r s a l t on my tongue. (Wong 1998, 25) The i n t e r t w i n i n g c o n t e x t s of A s i a n women's h i s t o r y and woman-to-woman d e s i r e i n Wong's p o e t r y i n s p i r e d me t o f i n d o t h e r w r i t e r s who wr o t e o p e n l y about s a m e - s e x . d e s i r e . A s i a n l e s b i a n , v i s u a l a r t i s t and w r i t e r , S h a n i Mootoo's (1996) n o v e l , Cereus Blooms at Night, b l e n d s l e s b i a n and gay c h a r a c t e r s i n t o a s t o r y o f p a s s i o n and b e t r a y a l c o m p l e t e w i t h o v e r t u r e s o f c o l o n i a l h i s t o r i e s and g e n e r a t i o n a l woes. T y l e r , a male c a r e t a k e r a t t h e P a r a d i s e Alms House, became i n t r i g u e d w i t h M a l a Ramchandin, a p a t i e n t whose f a t h e r s e x u a l l y abused h e r and whose mother e l o p e d w i t h a woman. The w a i l i n g s and m u t t e r i n g s o f M a l a c a p t u r e d T y l e r ' s a t t e n t i o n as he s l o w l y d i s c o v e r e d t h e l i f e s t o r y o f M a l a t h r o u g h town rumours and c o n v e r s a t i o n s . Mootoo uses f i c t i o n i n o r d e r t o comment on gay and l e s b i a n s e x u a l i t y , gender r o l e s , c o l o n i a l i s m , and i n c e s t . Queering the Pacific Northwest 25 S i m i l a r l y , A s i a n l e s b i a n , a c t i v i s t and w r i t e r , L a r i s s a L a i ' s (1995) When Fox Is a Thousand uses C h i n e s e m y t h o l o g y t o e x p l o r e women's l i v e s . S p a n n i n g t i m e , L a i d e p l o y s t h r e e n a r r a t i v e v o i c e s : t h e Fox, Yu Hsuan-Chi (t h e n i n t h - c e n t u r y p o e t e s s ) and an unnamed n a r r a t o r l i v i n g a contemporary t w e n t i e t h - c e n t u r y l i f e . As t h e Fox moves t h r o u g h a thous a n d y e a r s and t h e f i n a l t r a n s f o r m a t i o n i n t o a woman's body, we a r e f a c e d w i t h t a l e s o f s e d u c t i o n , murder, and i m m o r t a l i t y . Whereas Wong's p o e t r y p r e s e n t s a s t r o n g sense o f s o c i a l r e a l i s m , Mootoo's and L a i ' s works t o u c h on queer A s i a n s e n s i t i v i t y t h r o u g h m y t h i c l a n d s c a p e s and v i v i d c h a r a c t e r s . These works h e l p e d me s e t t h e framework f o r t h e i m a g i n a t i v e space o c c u p i e d by t h e e x h i b i t . The o v e r a l l l a c k o f queer A s i a n s c h o l a r s h i p prompted me t o s u r v e y b o t h f i c t i o n and n o n - f i c t i o n works f o r a more t h o r o u g h u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f t h e t o p i c i t s e l f . T h e r e f o r e , I b e l i e v e t h a t i t i s c r u c i a l f o r me t o s u r v e y a s e l e c t i o n o f l i t e r a r y w r i t i n g s i n a d d i t i o n t o Eng and Horn's (1998) e d i t e d volume o f e s s a y s on queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n i d e n t i t i e s . T h i s group o f l i t e r a r y w r i t i n g s was s e l e c t e d f o r t h e i r c o n t e n t s i n e x p r e s s i n g same-sex d e s i r e s and f o r t h e i r a u t h o r s i n i d e n t i f y i n g w i t h queer A s i a n women's co m m u n i t i e s . I n t h e p a s t two decades, A s i a n l e s b i a n s have f o c u s e d on f e m i n i s m i n t h e i r a t t e m p t t o d e v e l o p c r i t i c a l a n a l y s e s o f s o c i a l a n d _ c u l t u r a l d i f f e r e n c e s . F e m i n i s t s of c o l o u r have c o n t r i b u t e d a l a r g e amount o f s c h o l a r s h i p t o d i s m a n t l i n g t h e c l a s s and European a s s u m p t i o n s i n h e r e n t w i t h i n " f e m i n i s m s . " F o r example, Audre L o r d e , G l o r i a A n z a l d u a , C h e r r i e Moraga, b e l l hooks, Rey Chow, and G a y a t r i S p i v a k have h e l p e d t o p u t t h e w r i t i n g s o f f e m i n i s t s o f c o l o u r on t h e women's s t u d i e s map. b e l l hooks has w r i t t e n e x t e n s i v e l y on t h e t e n s i o n s between f e m i n i s t s of c o l o u r and w h i t e f e m i n i s t s . I n h e r 1984 c o l l e c t i o n o f e s s a y s , Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center, hooks was c r i t i c a l o f how f e m i n i s m was seen as "w h i t e women's r i g h t s e f f o r t s " (hooks 1984, 23). She q u e s t i o n s whether a c t i v i s t s i n t h e f e m i n i s t movement r e f l e c t on t h e b r o a d s o c i a l and p o l i t i c a l r e a l i t y o f women's l i v e s i n o r d e r t o i n c l u d e r a c e and c l a s s i n Queering the Pacific Northwest 26 t h e i r a n a l y s e s . More i n t e r e s t i n g l y , she b r i n g s up t h e i s s u e o f o w n e r s h i p and r e p r e s e n t a t i o n w i t h r e g a r d t o d e f i n i n g t h e term " f e m i n i s m . " She p o i n t s t o t h e l a c k o f p a r t i c i p a t i o n by women of c o l o u r and t h e r e l u c t a n c e o f w h i t e f e m i n i s t s t o a d d r e s s t h e r a c e i s s u e . I n Thinking Through, Himani B a n n e r j i (1995, 55-95) c r i t i c i z e s f e m i n i s t s f o r f o c u s i n g t o o s t r o n g l y on one's p e r s o n a l e x p e r i e n c e as a s t r a t e g y o f i n c l u s i o n . She u r g e s us t o l o o k beyond p e r s o n a l e x p e r i e n c e s and t o i n t e g r a t e s o c i a l r e l a t i o n s i n t o o ur a n a l y s i s o f who we a r e and where we come from. She warns us of how d i f f i c u l t i t i s t o m o b i l i z e communities i f o ur a n a l y s e s a r e base d o n l y on our own e x p e r i e n c e s . Her a n a l y s i s h e l p e d me t o examine how d i f f e r e n c e s a r e b e i n g framed and t r e a t e d w i t h i n t h e women's movement. W i t h r e g a r d t o b u i l d i n g b r i d g e s between f e m i n i s t s o f v a r i o u s b a c kgrounds, I was i n s p i r e d by t h e work of G l o r i a A n z a l d u a . I n h e r e s s a y " B r i d g e , D r a w b r i d g e , Sandbar o r I s l a n d : L e s b i a n s o f C o l o r H a c i e n d a A l i a n z a s , " A n z a l d u a s a y s t h a t a b r i d g e i s "a m e d i a t o r between y o u r s e l f and y o u r community and w h i t e p e o p l e -- l e s b i a n s , f e m i n i s t s , w h i t e men" ( A l b r e c h t and Brewer 1990, 223); a d r a w b r i d g e , w h i c h has t h e a b i l i t y t o w i t h d r a w from o r t o e x t e n d towards o t h e r s , s i g n i f i e s t h e element o f c h o i c e ; an i s l a n d , w h i c h e x i s t s as an e n t i t y s e p a r a t e d from o t h e r l a n d masses, s i g n i f i e s a s t a t e o f s o l i t a r y b e i n g ; and a sandbar, w h i c h i s a p a r t i a l l y exposed s t r i p o f sand formed by t h e n a t u r a l momentum of t i d e and waves, s i g n i f i e s t h e s t a t e o f movement. A n z a l d u a ' s a n a l o g i e s o f f e r p o s i t i v e s t r a t e g i e s f o r b u i l d i n g c o a l i t i o n s , and t h e y a l s o i n d i c a t e t h a t t h e r e w i l l be t i m e s when we need t o r e t r e a t . I i m a g i n e m y s e l f as e i t h e r a b r i d g e o r a sandbar, d e p e n d i n g upon t h e s t a g e o f community o r g a n i z i n g w i t h w h i c h I'm i n v o l v e d . I v i e w m y s e l f as an A s i a n l e s b i a n , a f e m i n i s t , and an AIDS a c t i v i s t . T h i s b e i n g t h e ca s e , I r e c o g n i s e t h a t f e m i n i s t w r i t i n g s p r o v i d e a p o i n t o f d e p a r t u r e f o r my own work. I t i s my i n t e n t i o n t o merge f e m i n i s t a c t i v i s m w i t h r e s e a r c h ; t h u s , i t i s l o g i c a l f o r me t o Queering the Pacific Northwest 27 t u r n t o f e m i n i s t r e s e a r c h methodology. D u r i n g my u n d e r g r a d u a t e work i n Women's S t u d i e s , I came a c r o s s f e m i n i s t m e t h o d o l o g i s t s L i z S t a n l e y and Sue Wise's e s s a y , " F e m i n i s t R e s e a r c h , F e m i n i s t C o n s c i o u s n e s s , and E x p e r i e n c e s o f Sexism." S t a n l e y and Wise s u g g e s t t h a t , i n c o n d u c t i n g t h e i r r e s e a r c h , f e m i n i s t r e s e a r c h e r s o f t e n a d d r e s s "the p e r s o n a l " (Fonow and Cook 1991, 266) . "The p e r s o n a l " i s d e f i n e d as t h a t w h i c h c o n s t i t u t e s a f e m i n i s t r e s e a r c h e r ' s p e r s o n a l e x p e r i e n c e s and academic background. S t a n l e y and Wise's r e s e a r c h on obscene phone c a l l e r s began when t h e i r home phone number was p u b l i c l y a d v e r t i s e d as a c o n t a c t number f o r l o c a l gay groups i n En g l a n d . Not o n l y was t h e i r r e s e a r c h t i e d i n w i t h t h e i r a c t i v i s t i n v o l v e m e n t w i t h gay and l e s b i a n c o m m unities, b u t S t a n l e y and Wise a l s o d i s c u s s e d t h e s h o r t - , medium-, and l o n g - t e r m e f f e c t s o f t h e s e c a l l s . I was drawn t o t h e i r methodology because i t was committed t o i n t e g r a t i n g a c t i v i s m w i t h r e s e a r c h p r a c t i c e s . By e x p o s i n g t h e i r p e r s o n a l and academic i n v o l v e m e n t i n t h e i r r e s e a r c h , S t a n l e y and Wise d e m o n s t r a t e how t h e y were p e r s o n a l l y t r a n s f o r m e d by t h e i r own r e s e a r c h , t h u s d e v e l o p i n g a d i f f e r e n t c o n s c i o u s n e s s o f t h e w o r l d a r o u n d them (Fonow and Cook, 1991, 265-83). As a community a c t i v i s t and r e s e a r c h e r , t h e n o t i o n o f t r a n s f o r m a t i o n speaks t o me. Community a c t i v i s m t r a n s f o r m e d my i n n e r s e l f and r e s e a r c h s u s t a i n e d my p a s s i o n i n th e a c t i v i s m i t s e l f . My o n g o i n g commitment i n s o c i a l j u s t i c e i s s u e s i s i n f o r m e d by t h e o r i e s on gender i d e n t i t y and r a c i a l dynamics. As I immerse m y s e l f i n t h e w r i t i n g of t h i s p a p er, I can f e e l a s h i f t i n g of c o n s c i o u s n e s s . A c o n s c i o u s n e s s t h a t r e i n s t a t e s a c t i v i s t work i n academia. A c o n s c i o u s n e s s t h a t shows t h e p o t e n t i a l o f g r o u n d i n g t h e o r i e s i n s o c i a l a c t i o n s . I n my s e a r c h f o r a r e s e a r c h e r who embodies as many s e l v e s as do I , I found F r a n c i s c o I b a n e z . A community r e s e a r c h e r , a h e a l t h e d u c a t o r , and a s u r v i v o r o f HIV/AIDS, Ibanez i s i n t e r e s t e d i n t h e r e l e v a n c e o f t h e HIV/AIDS p r e v e n t i o n e d u c a t i o n a l c u r r i c u l u m t o t h e d a i l y l i v e s o f L a t i n o gay m a l e s . H i s r e s e a r c h p r i m a r i l y i n v o l v e s p a r t i c i p a t o r y e t h n o g r a p h i c Queering the Pacific Northwest 28 interviews, and I was immensely moved by his approach towards interviewing: "I consciously attempted to make the interview a moment of r e f l e c t i o n , negotiation, and meaning making for a l l of us" (Castell and Bryson 1997, 122). Furthermore, Ibanez's research involves p o l i t i c a l advocacy. By analyzing interviews as educational moments pert a i n i n g to the multiple subjects of sexual i d e n t i t y , c u l t u r a l belonging, and HIV/AIDS, he hopes to educate people regarding the attitudes towards the r e l a t i o n s h i p among race, culture, sexuality, and l i v i n g with HIV/AIDS. Si m i l a r l y , i n w r i t i n g t h i s thesis on the Leaving Silence exhibit, I hope to educate readers regarding queer Asian American representations. I also hope to shed l i g h t on the need for more queer v i s i b i l i t y amongst Asians and P a c i f i c Islanders. I am p a r t i c u l a r l y interested i n feminist theories that c r i t i q u e F i r s t World/Third World tensions and that attempt to provide a n t i -oppression frameworks within which to analyze e x i s t i n g conditions. Examples of t h i s may be found i n the works of Chandra Talpade Mohanty, M. Jacque Alexander, Himani Bannerji and Roxana Ng. A grassroots community a c t i v i s t and feminist scholar, Chandra Talpade Mohanty has written extensively on the e f f e c t s of global c a p i t a l i s m on Third-World women i n low-wage i n d u s t r i e s . Her essay "Women Workers and C a p i t a l i s t S c r i p t s : Ideologies of Domination, Common Interests, and the P o l i t i c s of S o l i d a r i t y , " addresses how F i r s t World corporations and free trade t r e a t i e s create economies within which Third World countries are s i t e s f o r f actory assembly l i n e s (Alexander and Mohanty 1997, 3-29). She argues that Third World women become agents of production i n the "global e x p l o i t a t i o n of labour" (8). At the same time, these Third World s i t e s also become a common ground where women can attempt to b u i l d s o l i d a r i t y and to f i g h t against the oppressive employment p r a c t i c e s of multinational corporations. With regard to global economies, lesbian and po s t c o l o n i a l t h e o r i s t M. Jacqui Alexander explores how the i n f l u x of multinational c a p i t a l i s Queering the Pacific Northwest 29 dependent upon a h e t e r o s e x u a l s t a t e . She p o i n t s o ut how t h e t o u r i s m i n d u s t r y i n t h e Bahamas b e n e f i t s " t h e i m p e r i a l t o u r i s t " and, as a r e s u l t , t h r u s t s a n a t i o n i n t o a c o n d i t i o n o f s e r v i l i t y ( A l e x a n d e r and Mohanty 1997, 6 7 ) . "The i m p e r i a l t o u r i s t , " who comes from a w e a l t h y N o r t h A m e r i c a n background, l a n d s upon t h e s h o r e s o f t h e Bahamas e x p e c t i n g a b l e n d o f e x o t i c c u i s i n e and l o c a l h o s p i t a l i t y . T r a n s l a t i n g h o s p i t a l i t y i n t o terms o f s e x t o u r i s m , A l e x a n d e r f o c u s e s on how women i n th e Bahamas a r e s e x u a l l y c ommodified. Meanwhile, as t o u r i s m b r i n g s economic v i a b i l i t y , s t a t e s t r u c t u r e s a r e g e a r e d t o e n f o r c i n g p a t r i a r c h y and c o m p u l s o r y h e t e r o s e x u a l i t y (63-100). Roxanna Ng, i n h e r e s s a y "Sexism, Racism, C a n a d i a n N a t i o n a l i s m , " d e m o n s t r a t e s how v a r i o u s f a c t o r s o f gender, r a c e / e t h n i c i t y , and c l a s s r e l a t i o n s c o n t r i b u t e t o t h e s o c i a l f o r m a t i o n o f t h e C a n a d i a n s t a t e and i t s c a p i t a l i s t agenda ( B a n n e r j i 1993, 182-96). Ng t r a c e s t h e h i s t o r y o f immi g r a n t l a b o u r and i t s r o l e i n b u i l d i n g t h e C a n a d i a n n a t i o n . D u r i n g t h e p e r i o d between 1880 and 192 0 Canada i m p o r t e d male l a b o u r e r s from I r e l a n d , U k r a i n e , and S c a n d i n a v i a t o work on farms, and male l a b o u r e r s from C h i n a t o work on r a i l w a y s . I n a d d i t i o n , P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r s , a l s o r e f e r r e d as t h e Kanakas, were b r o u g h t i n t o work a t t i m b e r m i l l s . D u r i n g t h e same t i m e p e r i o d , w o r k i n g - c l a s s women from B r i t a i n were r e c r u i t e d by u p p e r - c l a s s B r i t i s h women t o s e r v e as d o m e s t i c h e l p e r s . Ng u r g e s us t o . l i n k t h e h i s t o r y o f o p p r e s s i o n t o our c u r r e n t u n d e r s t a n d i n g of how d i f f e r e n t forms o f o p p r e s s i o n i n t e r a c t s w i t h i n Canada. A l t h o u g h t h e a f o r e m e n t i o n e d f e m i n i s t l i t e r a t u r e was e s s e n t i a l t o my u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f f e m i n i s m , I a l s o t u r n e d t o w r i t i n g s -- b o t h f i c t i o n and n o n - f i c t i o n -- by l e s b i a n s o f c o l o u r . These w r i t i n g s h e l p e d me t o a n a l y z e r e c u r r i n g themes i n t h e Leaving Silence n a r r a t i v e s . G e n e r a l queer s t u d i e s a n t h o l o g i e s do n o t a d d r e s s t h e i s s u e o f r a c e i n as s p e c i f i c o r d e t a i l e d a manner as do t h e w r i t i n g s o f l e s b i a n s o f c o l o u r . As f o r gay A s i a n men's w r i t i n g s , t h e o n l y ones I have f o u n d t h a t d e a l w i t h s o c i a l a c t i v i s m a r e t h e e s s a y s i n Eng and Horn (1998) and Queering the Pacific Northwest 30 publications by l o c a l gay Asian organizations. In my personal experience i n community organizing i n Vancouver, B r i t i s h Columbia, I found i t d i f f i c u l t to engage the gay and bisexual Asian male community on issues of p o l i t i c a l advocacy. Whereas Asian lesbians and bisexual women were always v i s i b l e at p o l i t i c a l r a l l i e s and demonstrations against s o c i a l i n j u s t i c e , one would r a r e l y see the same l e v e l of enthusiasm on the part of the queer Asian men's community. One reason for t h i s might be the queer Asian women's community's close association with women's movements and feminist b e l i e f s . Another might be the p r i v i l e g e d c u l t u r a l p o s i t i o n of males. S h i f t i n g my gaze towards c u l t u r a l studies, media representation, and f i l m studies, I was i n s p i r e d by the writings of Richard Fung (1991) . As a filmmaker and queer Asian a c t i v i s t , Fung wrote an i n f l u e n t i a l essay that investigates the perception of gay Asian s e x u a l i t y within gay pornography. This essay, aptly e n t i t l e d "Looking for My Penis: The E r o t i c i z e d Asian i n Gay Video Porn," examines the r a c i a l i z e d representation of gay Asian males within gay pornography. A gay Asian male i s often seen on screen as an exotic subject of desire. By problematizing the r a c i a l dynamics i n gay pornography, Fung points out the r o l e of pornography i n perpetuating r a c i a l stereotypes among gay communities. Fung examines porn videos which show gay Asian men i n a state of servitude to white men. He argues that gay pornography i s "an acti v e agent i n representing and reproducing a sex-race status quo." (1991) S i m i l a r l y , South Asian lesbian f i l m d i r e c t o r Pratibha Parmar uses her films Flesh and Paper and Khush, to demonstrate the diasporic h i s t o r i e s of lesbians and gays of colour. Parmar challenges the notion of a homogenous gay community by depicting people of colour characters on screen, weaving the f i c t i o n a l accounts and documentary l i f e s t o r i e s into her fil m s ' s t o r y l i n e s . I also turned to L e s l i e Roman and Linda Eyre's (1997) d e f i n i t i o n of a "feminist m a t e r i a l i s t p o l i t i c s of c u l t u r a l studies" i n order to Queering the Pacific Northwest 31 d e l v e deeper i n t o t h e i n t e r s e c t i o n of f e m i n i s m and c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s . Roman and E y r e acknowledge t h e s i g n i f i c a n c e o f c u l t u r a l c o m modities w i t h r e g a r d t o how we u n d e r s t a n d gender r e l a t i o n s and w i t h r e g a r d t o our d a i l y p r a c t i c e s . They v i e w c u l t u r a l c o m modities "as t h e p r o d u c t s o f a c a p i t a l i s t mode of p r o d u c t i o n " and q u e s t i o n t h e gender d i v i s i o n o f l a b o u r i n v o l v e d i n t h e i r p r o d u c t i o n . F o r example, when we watch a p o p u l a r drama on t h e t e l e v i s i o n , we a r e a b s o r b i n g , n e g o t i a t i n g , r e j e c t i n g , and a c c e p t i n g c e r t a i n coded meanings r e g a r d i n g gender i d e n t i t i e s . A c u l t u r a l commodity, as such, i s o f t e n p r o d u c e d by a media c o r p o r a t i o n and i n t e n d e d f o r p a r t i c u l a r a u d i e n c e s . The e f f e c t i v e m a r k e t i n g o f c u l t u r a l c o m modities shows how media c o r p o r a t i o n s can use t h e i r c a p i t a l and r e s o u r c e s t o i n s t i l l i n us c e r t a i n d e f i n i t i o n s of t h e w o r l d . Roman and E y r e ' s a n a l y s i s e x p l a i n e d f o r me why t h e r e i s a l a c k o f queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n r e p r e s e n t a t i o n i n t h e g e n e r a l media. The media have an u n l i m i t e d r o l e i n d i s s e m i n a t i n g i n f o r m a t i o n , y e t t h e y a l s o c o n t r o l t h e k i n d o f i n f o r m a t i o n a v a i l a b l e . G i v e n t h a t t h e media c o r p o r a t i o n s a r e m o t i v a t e d a l m o s t s o l e l y by p r o f i t , i t i s no s u r p r i s e t o f i n d t h a t m a i n s t r e a m N o r t h A m e r i c a n media c a t e r t o h e t e r o s e x u a l , m i d d l e -c l a s s p o p u l a t i o n s . A l t h o u g h t h e Leaving Silence e x h i b i t i s n o t i n any way a c o m m e r c i a l p r o d u c t , i t i s an a l t e r n a t i v e form o f c u l t u r a l commodity -- one i n w h i c h queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n i d e n t i t i e s and e x p e r i e n c e s a r e a s s e r t e d and p l a c e d b e f o r e t h e p u b l i c eye.. There i s no doubt t h a t S t u a r t H a l l i s t h e l e a d i n g a u t h o r i t y i n t h e a r e a o f c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s ; however I fo u n d t h a t Luke (1996) and Roman and C h r i s t i a n - S m i t h (1988) t o o k H a l l ' s i n s i g h t s and p r o v i d e d them w i t h a much needed gender l e n s . C u l t u r a l and l i t e r a r y c r i t i c s i n t h e d i s c i p l i n e o f A s i a n A m e r i c a n s t u d i e s were a l s o u s e f u l i n t h a t t h a t i n s e r t e d gender i d e n t i t y i n t o t h e c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s d i s c u s s i o n (Lowe 1996; Kumar 2000; M i k i 1998). A p a r t from t h e r e f l e c t i o n s o f t h e o r i s t s and a c t i v i s t s , I a l s o opened my f i l i n g c a b i n e t and r e v i e w e d p a s t a d v i s o r y committee members' Queering the Pacific Northwest 32 n o t e s , m e e t i n g m i n u t e s , and m a t e r i a l s from t h e v o l u n t e e r package. M a t e r i a l s i n t h e v o l u n t e e r package i n c l u d e d two c o p i e s o f c o n s e n t forms, an agreement form t o be s i g n e d by t h e v o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r , i n t e r v i e w i n g and t r a n s c r i b i n g t i p s , p r o c e d u r e s f o r c o n d u c t i n g o r a l h i s t o r y i n t e r v i e w s , a t r a n s c r i p t i n d e x form, i n t e r v i e w q u e s t i o n s , and a b r o c h u r e d e s c r i b i n g t h e p r o j e c t . N e e d l e s s t o s a y , t h e i n t e r v i e w t r a n s c r i p t s and t h e a u d i o t a p e s p r o v i d e d t h e b a s i c w o r k i n g m a t e r i a l f o r my r e s e a r c h . F u r t h e r t o t h i s , newspaper c l i p p i n g s , p r e s s r e l e a s e s , and a d m i n i s t r a t i v e paperwork f i l l e d i n some of t h e gaps i n my memory bank. I n C h a p t e r 3, "Methods and P r o c e d u r e s , " I s h a l l o u t l i n e t h e methodology i n d a t a c o l l e c t i o n and t h e p r o c e s s e s o f c o o r d i n a t i n g t h e e x h i b i t . Queering the Pacific Northwest 33 CHAPTER 3: METHODS AND PROCEDURES I n March 1996 I was r e c r u i t e d by members o f t h e S e a t t l e group A s i a n L e s b i a n and B i s e x u a l A l l i a n c e (ALBA) t o a p p l y f o r t h e p o s i t i o n o f p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r f o r Leaving Silence. They had a t t e n d e d t h e c o n f e r e n c e " L o t u s R o o t s : A G a t h e r i n g of E a s t and S o u t h e a s t A s i a n L e s b i a n s , Gays and B i s e x u a l s , " w h i c h I had c o o r d i n a t e d i n Vancouver, B r i t i s h C o l u m b i a . " L o t u s R o o t s " was a two-day e v e n t h e l d a t Mount P l e a s a n t N e i g h b o u r h o o d House under t h e s p o n s o r s h i p o f t h e A s i a n S o c i e t y f o r t h e I n t e r v e n t i o n o f AIDS. 1 3 The pu r p o s e o f t h e c o n f e r e n c e was t o b r i n g t o g e t h e r E a s t and S o u t h e a s t A s i a n s who i d e n t i f i e d as l e s b i a n , gay, and b i s e x u a l i n o r d e r t o d i s c u s s i s s u e s t h a t were common t o o u r r a c i a l and s e x u a l i d e n t i t i e s . 1 4 On b o t h days t h e r e were v a r i o u s workshops, l i t e r a r y r e a d i n g s , v i d e o s c r e e n i n g s , and s o c i a l e v e n t s . I was p l e a s e d t o be a p p r o a c h e d b y t h e S e a t t l e group because I was v e r y much i n t e r e s t e d i n t a k i n g t h e s k i l l s t h a t I had a c q u i r e d t h r o u g h c o o r d i n a t i n g " L o t u s R o o t s " and a p p l y i n g them t o a d i f f e r e n t c o n t e x t and f o r a d i f f e r e n t queer A s i a n community. I f e l t t h a t i t w o u l d be good f o r me t o work w i t h o t h e r community a c t i v i s t s w i t h i n a c u l t u r a l and s o c i a l c o n t e x t t h a t w o u l d e n a b l e me t o c h a l l e n g e m a i n s t r e a m n o t i o n s of h i s t o r y and p o l i t i c s . I n June 1996, I was o f f i c i a l l y h i r e d a s t h e p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r f o r Leaving Silence. I was g i v e n a four-month t i m e frame and p u t i n cha r g e o f t h e o v e r a l l p r o d u c t i o n and c o o r d i n a t i o n o f t h e p r o j e c t . I was r e s p o n s i b l e f o r c o o r d i n a t i n g t h e A d v i s o r y Committee m e e t i n g s , p r o v i d i n g s u p p o r t t o t h e v o l u n t e e r s , e n s u r i n g t h e i n t e r v i e w s were t a p e d and r e c o r d e d , and p u b l i c i z i n g t h e e x h i b i t and a r r a n g i n g f o r i t s d i s p l a y l o c a t i o n s . I worked v e r y c l o s e l y w i t h t h e Wor k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee 1 3 The Asian Society for the Intervention of AIDS (ASIA) is a community organization based in Vancouver, British Columbia. Its mandate is to provide language-appropriate and culturally sensitive HIV/AIDS prevention and education to East and Southeast Asian communities. Over the last four years, ASIA staff have coordinated two queer Asian conferences and one anti-homophobia poster campaign, and they have produced a multi-lingual support pamphlet for parents and friends of queer Asians. As one of ASIA'S employees, I learned to coordinate projects on a grassroots level and to advocate for lesbian and gay rights. Queering the Pacific Northwest 34 members and o b t a i n e d v a l u a b l e f e e d b a c k from them on m a t t e r s r a n g i n g from community c o n t a c t s t o l o g i s t i c a l d e t a i l s r e l a t i n g t o t h e c o n s t r u c t i o n o f th e p a n e l s . My m e e t i n g s w i t h them i n v o l v e d open d i s c u s s i o n s w i t h i n w h i c h e v e r y o n e ' s v o i c e was h e a r d and v a l u e d . The p a i d s t a f f c o n s i s t e d o f a p h o t o g r a p h e r , a g r a p h i c d e s i g n e r , and m y s e l f . Zone Montoya was t h e p h o t o g r a p h e r ; she was h i r e d on a c o n t r a c t b a s i s and was r e s p o n s i b l e f o r a l l p h o t o s e s s i o n s as w e l l as f o r t h e development and r e p r o d u c t i o n of phot o p o r t r a i t s . I n 1989, Zone had been i n v o l v e d i n t h e A s i a n l e s b i a n and b i s e x u a l group i n S e a t t l e t h a t had p r e - d a t e d ALBA. T r a c y Tsutsumoto was t h e d e s i g n e r , and she was r e s p o n s i b l e f o r t h e c o m p l e t e l a y o u t o f t h e e x h i b i t p a n e l s . She a l s o d e s i g n e d t h e s o u v e n i r b o o k l e t , t h e p r o m o t i o n a l p o s t c a r d , and t h e i n v i t a t i o n c a r d f o r t h e o p e n i n g r e c e p t i o n . B e f o r e j o i n i n g us, T r a c y had p r o d u c e d l a y o u t and d e s i g n f o r t h e International Examiner, S e a t t l e ' s C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t community newspaper. The t h r e e o f us c o l l a b o r a t e d on t h e a r t i s t i c d i r e c t i o n o f t h e e x h i b i t . One o f my major r e s p o n s i b i l i t i e s was t o s e l e c t t h e n a r r a t o r s who were t o appear i n t h e e x h i b i t and t o e d i t t h e i r n a r r a t i v e s . I base d my d e c i s i o n s on t h e i n f o r m a t i o n c o n t a i n e d i n t h e t r a n s c r i p t i n d e x forms, upon w h i c h i n t e r v i e w e r s w r o t e t h e i r summaries o f t h e i n t e r v i e w s (see App e n d i x D). U s i n g t h e i n f o r m a t i o n p r o v i d e d i n t h e forms, i n s e l e c t i n g n a r r a t o r s I t o o k i n t o a c c o u n t t h e f o l l o w i n g c r i t e r i a : (1) b a l a n c e o f p o s i t i v e and n e g a t i v e e x p e r i e n c e s , (2) age d i f f e r e n c e s , (3) e t h n i c d i v e r s i t y , (4) s e x u a l i d e n t i t y , (5) p o l i t i c a l b e l i e f s , (6) g e n e r a t i o n ( i . e . , l e n g t h o f t i m e i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s ) , and (7) s o c i a l b ackground. C r i t e r i o n 1, t h e b a l a n c e o f p o s i t i v e and n e g a t i v e e x p e r i e n c e s , was i m p o r t a n t t o me because, as much as we a r e p r o u d o f our i d e n t i t i e s , we a r e a l s o , t h r o u g h e n c o u n t e r i n g d i s c r i m i n a t i n g p r a c t i c e s , c o n s t a n t l y r eminded of our p l a c e i n s o c i e t y . By p o r t r a y i n g p o s i t i v e e x p e r i e n c e s The transgender population was not included in this conference. Queering the Pacific Northwest 35 t h a t v a l i d a t e o ur b e i n g queer and A s i a n A m e r i c a n as w e l l as n e g a t i v e e x p e r i e n c e s t h a t c l e a r l y i n d i c a t e t h e s o c i a l i n j u s t i c e endemic t o our s o c i e t y , t h e n a r r a t i v e s p r o v i d e a h o l i s t i c p i c t u r e o f queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n l i v e s . W i t h r e g a r d t o t h e C r i t e r i o n 2, age d i f f e r e n c e s , i t i s o b v i o u s t h a t , i n g e n e r a l , coming out i n t h e 1960s was much more d i f f i c u l t t h a n was coming out i n t h e 1990s. . D e p i c t i n g n a r r a t o r s from d i f f e r e n t g e n e r a t i o n s e n a b l e s t h e e x h i b i t t o c o n t r i b u t e t o an i n t e r -g e n e r a t i o n a l d i a l o g u e t h a t i s e d u c a t i o n a l t o o r g a n i z e r s and v i e w e r s a l i k e . The you n g e s t n a r r a t o r , T i n o U m a l i , was s e v e n t e e n , and t h e o l d e s t , Ron Ho, was s i x t y when t h e i n t e r v i e w s were c o n d u c t e d . P e r s o n a l l y , I b e l i e v e d t h a t C r i t e r i a 3 and 4, e t h n i c d i v e r s i t y and s e x u a l i d e n t i t y , r e s p e c t i v e l y , were t h e most i m p o r t a n t and o b v i o u s f o r d e t e r m i n i n g w h i c h n a r r a t i v e s w o u l d be a c c e p t e d . As soon as I began c o o r d i n a t i n g Leaving Silence I knew t h a t , when i t came t o c h o o s i n g n a r r a t o r s , we woul d be r e s t r i c t e d t o a r e l a t i v e l y s m a l l p o o l o f p e o p l e ( i . e . , whoever happened t o be a v a i l a b l e w i t h i n t h e community a t hand). We a l s o r e l i e d upon t h e c o n n e c t i o n s o f t h e Work i n g A d v i s o r y Committee when i t came t o s e l e c t i n g n a r r a t o r s , b e i n g c o n t e n t t o go w i t h whomever t h e y f e l t c o m f o r t a b l e a p p r o a c h i n g . As I have mentioned, i n h i n d s i g h t , t h i s was a f a i l u r e on my p a r t : I s h o u l d have e n s u r e d t h a t t h e r e was adequate P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r p a r t i c i p a t i o n . W i t h r e g a r d t o C r i t e r i o n 5, p o l i t i c a l b e l i e f s , I f e l t t h a t i t was i m p o r t a n t t o i n c o r p o r a t e a n t i - o p p r e s s i o n frameworks i n t o t h e n a r r a t i v e s . I f t h e n a r r a t o r s t a l k e d about a n t i - o p p r e s s i o n , t h e n I w o u l d t r y t o i n c l u d e t h i s i n t h e i r e x c e r p t s . As f o r C r i t e r i o n 6, g e n e r a t i o n , i n s e l e c t i n g n a r r a t o r s w i t h an eye t o r e p r e s e n t i n g d i v e r s e g e n e r a t i o n a l b ackgrounds I hoped t o d e m o n s t r a t e what coming out means f o r a r e c e n t i m m i g r a n t as opposed t o what i t means f o r , say, a t h i r d - g e n e r a t i o n A s i a n A m e r i c a n . S i m i l a r l y , w i t h r e g a r d t o C r i t e r i o n 7, s o c i a l b ackground, s o c i o - e c o n o m i c s t a t u s and employment s i t u a t i o n a f f e c t coming out p r o c e s s . Queering the Pacific Northwest 36 W i t h r e g a r d t o media r e l a t i o n s , I was t h e p r i m a r y p e r s o n t o re s p o n d t o any q u e r i e s c o n c e r n i n g t h e r a t i o n a l e o f t h e e x h i b i t and/or i t s o n g o i n g development. I a d v e r t i s e d t h e e x h i b i t i n such p r o m o t i o n a l m a t e r i a l s as b r o c h u r e s , newspaper a r t i c l e s , and t h e s o u v e n i r b o o k l e t we p u t t o g e t h e r f o r t h e o p e n i n g r e c e p t i o n . S i n c e I worked m a i n l y w i t h v o l u n t e e r s , I c o m p i l e d i n f o r m a t i o n f o r a v o l u n t e e r package; I a l s o drew up a f i n a l e v a l u a t i o n form f o r my r o l e as p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r . As a wrap-up e x e r c i s e , I wanted t o f i n d o ut what t h e v o l u n t e e r s t h o u g h t about t h e c o o r d i n a t i o n p r o c e s s . I n a d d i t i o n , t h e e v a l u a t i o n form c o u l d s e r v e as a s u p p o r t i n g document f o r t h e g r a n t a p p l i c a t i o n s f o r f u t u r e v i s i b i l i t y campaigns. I s u p e r v i s e d a l l v o l u n t e e r s (who ch e c k e d i n w i t h me when t h e y needed t o r e p o r t on t h e i r p r o g r e s s o r l a c k t h e r e o f ) e x c e p t t h o s e on t h e Hon o r a r y and Work i n g A d v i s o r y Committees. Throughout t h i s b r i e f , f o u r -month p e r i o d , I c o n t a c t e d , n e g o t i a t e d , and a r r a n g e d f o r t h r e e d i s p l a y l o c a t i o n s : t h e S e a t t l e P u b l i c L i b r a r y , t h e U n i v e r s i t y o f Washington, and th e H e a r t - t o - A r t G a l l e r y . I n o r d e r t o a r r a n g e h a v i n g Leaving Silence d i s p l a y e d a t t h e s e l o c a t i o n s , I had t o make a p p o i n t m e n t s w i t h s i t e managers and c o n v i n c e them o f t h e e x h i b i t ' s i m p o r t a n c e . F o r t u n a t e l y , t h r o u g h t h e Wor k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee, we had c o n t a c t p e r s o n s a t t h e S e a t t l e P u b l i c L i b r a r y and t h e U n i v e r s i t y o f Washington. T h i s made i n t r o d u c i n g t h e e x h i b i t much e a s i e r , and i t k e p t t h e n e g o t i a t i n g p r o c e s s t o a minimum. I n o r d e r t o a r r a n g e f o r a d i s p l a y s i t e , one n o r m a l l y needs t o e x p l a i n t o t h e s i t e a d m i n i s t r a t o r s why t h e e x h i b i t i s a p p r o p r i a t e f o r them. A f t e r t h e s i t e a d m i n i s t r a t o r s approve t h e n a t u r e o f t h e e x h i b i t , t h e n t h e n e x t s t e p i s t o a r r a n g e t h e r e q u i s i t e d a t e s and space. The que e r n a t u r e o f Leaving Silence c o u l d have made i t v e r y d i f f i c u l t t o c o n t a c t s i t e a d m i n i s t r a t o r s as t h e r e i s al w a y s a f e a r o f homophobia. F o r t u n a t e l y , because t h e Wor k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee had t h e names of queer o r q u e e r - f r i e n d l y s t a f f members a t t h e d i s p l a y venues, we c o u l d , f o r t h e most p a r t , a v o i d t h e s e d i f f i c u l t i e s . Queering the Pacific Northwest 37 A s i d e from r e c r u i t i n g i n d i v i d u a l s t o p a r t i c i p a t e on t h e a d v i s o r y committees, I was a c t i v e l y s e e k i n g p r o j e c t endorsements from a g e n c i e s i n t h e a r e a and "mainstream" gay and l e s b i a n ' O r g a n i z a t i o n s (See A p p e n d i x C, L i s t o f Community E n d o r s e m e n t s ) . Through t h e s e endorsements I hoped t o g a i n a c c e s s t o t h e f a c i l i t i e s o f t h e a g e n c i e s i n q u e s t i o n as w e l l as t o s e c u r e p u b l i c s u p p o r t f o r t h e e x h i b i t . By a l l o w i n g t h e m s e l v e s t o be a s s o c i a t e d w i t h t h e e x h i b i t , t h e s e a g e n c i e s were, i n e f f e c t , d e c l a r i n g p u b l i c s u p p o r t f o r i t . Some of them a l s o d o n a t e d funds t o h e l p d e f r a y t h e e x h i b i t ' s expenses. The e a r l y commitment of v o l u n t e e r o r g a n i z e r s t o w i d e l y p u b l i c i z i n g t h e e x h i b i t and t o f a c i l i t a t i n g community i n t e r e s t i n queer A s i a n v i s i b i l i t y c o n t r i b u t e d immeasurably t o i t s s u c c e s s f u l c o o r d i n a t i o n . I was f o r t u n a t e i n d e e d t o s t e p i n t o a network made up o f i n d i v i d u a l s who had e x t e n s i v e a c t i v i s t b ackgrounds i n a d v o c a t i n g f o r t h e r i g h t s o f r a c i a l m i n o r i t i e s . M i c h e l l e F i n e ' s (1994) e s s a y , " D i s - s t a n c e and Ot h e r S t a n c e s : N e g o t i a t i o n s o f Power I n s i d e F e m i n i s t R e s e a r c h , " p o i n t s t o t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f r e c o g n i z i n g one's l o c a t i o n w i t h i n t h e web of r e s e a r c h r e l a t i o n s . F i r s t , she c a l l s f o r t h e r e s e a r c h e r t o expose h e r p o l i t i c a l and t h e o r e t i c a l s t a n d p o i n t w i t h i n t h e r e s e a r c h p r o j e c t , t a k i n g i n t o a c c o u n t t h e p o s s i b i l i t i e s o f moving between l o c a t i o n s d u r i n g t h e r e s e a r c h p r o c e s s . Second, she a s k s f o r c r i t i c a l a n a l y s e s o f r e s e a r c h m a t e r i a l and open d i s c u s s i o n s on " c o n t r a d i c t i o n s and c o n f l i c t s w i t h i n c o l l a b o r a t i v e p r a c t i c e s " ( 2 3 ) . I was p o l i t i c a l l y drawn t o t h e Leaving Silence p r o j e c t because o f my p r i o r e x p e r i e n c e i n o r g a n i z i n g w i t h i n queer E a s t and S o u t h e a s t A s i a n communities i n Vancouver. I f e l t t h a t t h e Leaving Silence p r o j e c t w o u l d e n r i c h my u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f queer A s i a n i d e n t i t i e s a c r o s s n a t i o n a l b o r d e r s . I n w r i t i n g t h i s t h e s i s , I am b o t h s c h o l a r l y r e s e a r c h e r and p a i d p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r . As a s c h o l a r l y r e s e a r c h e r , I am supposed t o expose t h e s t r e n g t h s and weaknesses o f t h e p r o j e c t ; as t h e p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r , I was supposed t o a d v o c a t e f o r and Queering the Pacific Northwest 38 d e f e n d t h e p r o j e c t . Through c r o s s i n g r o l e b o u n d a r i e s I have l e a r n e d t o c r i t i c a l l y a n a l y z e my i n s i d e r ' s knowledge o f t h e s u b j e c t m a t t e r and t o q u e s t i o n my own t h i n k i n g . I n e s s e n c e , t h e w r i t i n g of t h i s t h e s i s has become a " c o l l a b o r a t i v e p r a c t i c e , " i n v o l v i n g my m u l t i p l e i d e n t i t i e s ( i . e . , as r e s e a r c h e r , community a c t i v i s t , p r o j e c t o r g a n i z e r , and A s i a n l e s b i a n ) . When a t t e m p t i n g t o d e c i d e whether o r n o t t o a c c e p t t h e p o s i t i o n of p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r , I had some d i f f i c u l t y gauging.my own a b i l i t i e s i n t h e r e g a r d . I s p e n t a g r e a t d e a l o f t i m e c o n t e m p l a t i n g my A s i a n l e s b i a n i d e n t i t y i n d i a s p o r a , and t h i s soon d e v e l o p e d i n t o c o n c e r n s o v e r my a b i l i t y t o m o b i l i z e t h e communities i n S e a t t l e ' s I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t . Not o n l y was I an o u t s i d e r t o t h e s e c o m munities, I was a l s o n o t f a m i l i a r w i t h t h e i r p a s t h i s t o r y and t h e dynamics between t h e i r v a r i o u s a g e n c i e s . The d i f f e r e n c e s i n t h e c u l t u r a l , s o c i a l , and p o l i t i c a l a s p e c t s of t h e S e a t t l e API p o p u l a t i o n and t h e Vancouver API p o p u l a t i o n a l s o c o n t r i b u t e d t o my g r o w i n g l i s t o f w o r r i e s . F i n a l l y , I was u n c l e a r a b out t h e p a s t i n t e r a c t i o n s between queer API and non-queer API c o m m u n i t i e s , and between queer API communities and m a i n s t r e a m queer c o m m u n i t i e s . S t i l l , I b e l i e v e d t h a t t h i s complex l a y e r i n g of r e l a t i o n s w o u l d p r o v i d e me w i t h an e x c i t i n g c h a l l e n g e . A f t e r a l l , I was f u l l y aware of t h e f a c t t h a t , i f w o r s t came t o w o r s t , I c o u l d a l w a y s "escape" back t o Vancouver. As w i t h e v e r y r e s e a r c h p r o j e c t , methodology i s a c o n t e s t e d e t h i c a l s i t e . The n a r r a t i v e theme of coming o u t as q ueer A P I s p o s e d many d i f f i c u l t i e s a r o u n d t h e i s s u e of c o n f i d e n t i a l i t y . Not o n l y d i d t h e n a r r a t o r s d i s c l o s e v a r i e t i e s of queer s e x u a l i t y , b u t t h e b l a c k - a n d - w h i t e p h o t o p o r t r a i t s on t h e e x h i b i t , p a n e l s c a t a p u l t e d them i n t o a p u b l i c and dangerous space. S i n c e t h e p u r p o s e of Leaving Silence was t o e n s u r e t h e v i s i b i l i t y o f queer A P I s , t h e members of b o t h a d v i s o r y committees as w e l l as t h e s t a f f worked t o l o c a t e a c c e s s i b l e p u b l i c s p aces f o r i t s d i s p l a y . However, we were w e l l aware t h a t t h i s meant t h a t t h e n a r r a t o r s c o u l d e a s i l y be p u t i n t h e p o s i t i o n of b e i n g t h e t a r g e t s of homophobic Queering the Pacific Northwest 39 a c t s , r a n g i n g from j o b l o s s t o gay b a s h i n g . (I have n o t h e a r d , e i t h e r f rom t h e Working A d v i s o r y Committee members o r t h e n a r r a t o r s , about any such i n c i d e n t s . ) I t was d i f f i c u l t t o e n s u r e t h e s a f e t y o f t h e n a r r a t o r s even though we were aware o f t h e p o t e n t i a l d angers i n v o l v e d i n t h i s p r o j e c t . C l e a r l y , t h e c a r e f u l h a n d l i n g o f b o t h t r a n s c r i p t s and ph o t o g r a p h s was t o p p r i o r i t y : each p a r t i c i p a n t was c o n s u l t e d , and each g r a n t e d h e r / h i s c o n s e n t t o t h e f i n a l form o f h e r / h i s p a r t o f t h e e x h i b i t . The r e s e a r c h e r i s o f t e n p o s i t i o n e d as an e x p e r t who i s embarking upon a j o u r n e y t o d i s c o v e r t h e " t r u t h " about s o m e t h i n g . F e m i n i s t s have p o i n t e d t o t h e e x p l o r a t o r y n a t u r e o f r e s e a r c h and t o t h e way i n w h i c h t h e knowledge o f m a r g i n a l i z e d p o p u l a t i o n s has been c o l o n i z e d . F e m i n i s t pedagogue and a n t i - r a c i s t t h e o r i s t L e s l i e G. Roman's e t h n o g r a p h i c r e s e a r c h on m i d d l e - and w o r k i n g - c l a s s punk women d i r e c t l y c h a l l e n g e s t h e s u b j e c t / o b j e c t d u a l i s m i n p o s i t i v i s t i c r e s e a r c h . Roman (1993, 281) p r o p o s e s t h e co n c e p t o f "double e x p o s u r e " t o i l l u s t r a t e how a f e m i n i s t m a t e r i a l i s t e t h n o g r a p h e r can use s e l f - r e f l e x i v i t y t o r e v e a l h e r " p r i o r b e l i e f s and s t r u c t u r a l ( c l a s s , gender, and r a c i a l ) i n t e r e s t s " f o r o r a g a i n s t h e r s u b j e c t s o f s t u d y . The r e s e a r c h e r p r o b l e m a t i z e s t h e a c t o f d i s c o v e r y as she shapes t h e a n a l y s i s o f what c o n s t i t u t e s t h e " t r u t h . " The " t r u t h , " as such, i s no- l o n g e r a p u r e l y o b j e c t i v e c l a i m . S i m i l a r l y , L i n d a A l c o f f r a i s e s t h e i s s u e of what o c c u r s when a s o c i a l l y p r i v i l e g e d p e r s o n speaks about m a r g i n a l i z e d p o p u l a t i o n s as i f she/he i s f a m i l i a r w i t h t h e i r c o n d i t i o n s . A l c o f f c a l l s f o r a c l o s e e x a m i n a t i o n o f t h e s o c i a l , p o l i t i c a l , and c u l t u r a l l o c a t i o n s o f t h e sp e a k e r , t h e c o n t e n t s o f h e r / h i s speech, and i t s i n t e n d e d a u d i e n c e s . I n b e i n g a c c o u n t a b l e f o r t h e i r r e s e a r c h f i n d i n g s and t h e e f f e c t s t h e y have on t h e i r s u b j e c t s , A l c o f f (1991, 26) warns r e s e a r c h e r s t o be aware o f t h e p o s s i b i l i t y t h a t t h e y w i l l s i m p l y by " f u r t h e r s i l e n c [ i n g ] t h e l e s s e r - p r i v i l e g e d group's own a b i l i t y t o speak and be h e a r d . " I n my work w i t h Leaving Silence, I ke p t t h e s e i s s u e s f i r m l y i n Queering the Pacific Northwest 40 mind, c o n s t a n t l y a t t e m p t i n g t o e n s u r e t h a t I r e m a i n e d s e n s i t i v e t o t h e c o n s t r u c t e d n a t u r e o f " t r u t h " and t o how easy i t i s t o a p p r o p r i a t e t h e v o i c e s o f o t h e r s . I b e l i e v e t h a t , i n t h e end, my r o l e as r e s e a r c h e r e n a b l e d me t o " g i v e back t o t h e community" by documenting an i m p o r t a n t community p r o j e c t , i n v e s t i g a t i n g i t s c o o r d i n a t i o n p r o c e s s , and a n a l y z i n g i t s p l a c e w i t h i n p u b l i c pedagogy. My r e s e a r c h f i n d i n g s s h o u l d b e n e f i t o t h e r community a c t i v i s t s who a r e i n t e r e s t e d i n d e v e l o p i n g s i m i l a r p r o j e c t s w i t h i n o t h e r s o c i o - c u l t u r a l c o n t e x t s . Each queer API community i n each c i t y c o u l d p o t e n t i a l l y use t h e f i n d i n g s as a t e m p l a t e t o c o o r d i n a t e t h e i r v i s i b i l i t y campaigns. More i n t e r e s t i n g l y , community-b a s e d o r g a n i z a t i o n s c o u l d use t h e e x h i b i t as an example o f how t o l o c a t e f u n d i n g f o r t h e i r own p r o j e c t s . And e d u c a t o r s and s t u d e n t s c o u l d use my r e s e a r c h t o open up c o n v e r s a t i o n s d e a l i n g w i t h t h e i n t e r s e c t i o n o f a c t i v i s m and academia as w e l l as t o expand o p p o r t u n i t i e s f o r c o n d u c t i n g a c t i v i s t r e s e a r c h i n t h e a r e a o f e d u c a t i o n . I n t e r v i e w P r o c e d u r e s We began r e c r u i t i n g i n t e r v i e w s u b j e c t s i m m e d i a t e l y a f t e r a b r a i n s t o r m i n g s e s s i o n d u r i n g w h i c h we d i s c u s s e d a number of p o s s i b l e i n t e r v i e w c a n d i d a t e s . W o r k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee members c a l l e d o ut t h e names of p e o p l e t h e y p e r s o n a l l y o r p r o f e s s i o n a l l y knew and I w r o t e t h e s e down on s h e e t s o f f l i p - c h a r t p a p e r . The d i s c u s s i o n c e n t r e d a r o u n d who th e committee members c o u l d a p p r o a c h and ask t o p a r t i c i p a t e i n a p r o j e c t of t h i s n a t u r e . Based on t h e r e s o u r c e s o f t h e Wor k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee members, a t o t a l o f t h i r t y - e i g h t i n t e r v i e w s u b j e c t s were s u g g e s t e d a t t h e 19 June 1996 m e e t i n g . Then, d e p e n d i n g on who had a c c e s s t o t h e i n t e r v i e w c a n d i d a t e s , t h e Wor k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee members and I c o n t a c t e d p o t e n t i a l i n t e r v i e w e r s and s o l i c i t e d t h e i r p a r t i c i p a t i o n . Among t h e t h i r t y - e i g h t p o s s i b l e i n t e r v i e w c a n d i d a t e s , twenty-one a g r e e d t o p a r t i c i p a t e i n t h e e x h i b i t . A t t h i s p o i n t , we were t r y i n g t o r e c r u i t as many p a r t i c i p a n t s as we c o u l d i n o r d e r t o have a Queering the Pacific Northwest 41 l a r g e r p o o l from w h i c h t o choose when i t came t o t h e f i n a l s e l e c t i o n p r o c e s s . As we d i d n o t know t h e p e o p l e t h e committee s u g g e s t e d , t h e r e was no s i g n i f i c a n t d i s c u s s i o n o f t h e i r a p p r o p r i a t e n e s s o r i n a p p r o p r i a t e n e s s f o r t h e p r o j e c t . As a c l o s e l y k n i t group o f community l e a d e r s and a c t i v i s t s , t h e members of t h e Wor k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee were r e s p e c t f u l o f each o t h e r ' s o p i n i o n s . We r e c r u i t e d v o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r s from t h e Working A d v i s o r y Committee and from ALBA's and Q&A's membership b a s e s . S i n c e most o f t h e Wor k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee members s i g n e d up t o be v o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r s t h e m s e l v e s , t h e r e were o n l y l i m i t e d p o s i t i o n s a v a i l a b l e f o r o t h e r v o l u n t e e r s . One of t h e r e a s o n s t h a t t h e members of t h e committee were i n t e r v i e w e r s was t h a t , when approached t o p a r t i c i p a t e i n t h e p r o j e c t , many o f t h e n a r r a t o r s a s k e d f o r them. As a r e s u l t , we o n l y needed t o r e c r u i t a h a n d f u l o f v o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r s . When word o f Leaving Silence s p r e a d w i t h i n o ur r e l a t i v e l y s m a l l q u eer API community, I was i m m e d i a t e l y a p p r o a c h e d b y f i v e p e o p l e who were i n t e r e s t e d i n l e a r n i n g t o be i n t e r v i e w e r s . I knew one of t h e s e p e o p l e p e r s o n a l l y , and t h e o t h e r s were r e f e r r e d by Wo r k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee members: t h e s e p e o p l e f i l l e d t h e r e m a i n i n g p o s i t i o n s . Most of t h e s e v o l u n t e e r s have some e x p e r i e n c e of i n t e r v i e w i n g f o r r e s e a r c h t o p i c s u s e d i n c o l l e g e t e r m p a p e r s . A l l i n t e r v i e w e r s were e i t h e r s t i l l a t t e n d i n g c o l l e g e o r g r a d u a t e d from u n i v e r s i t y w i t h an u n d e r g r a d u a t e , and i n one c a s e , w i t h a g r a d u a t e degree. These v o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r s underwent no f o r m a l s e l e c t i o n p r o c e s s . The Work i n g A d v i s o r y Committee and m y s e l f were more c o n c e r n e d w i t h a s k i n g queer A s i a n community members t o c o n d u c t t h e i n t e r v i e w s . I was a l s o h o p i n g t h a t an i n t e r v i e w e r from t h e community wou l d e n s u r e a c e r t a i n degree of c u l t u r a l competency and queer s e n s i t i v i t y i n t h e i n t e r v i e w i n g p r o c e s s . Each i n t e r v i e w e r was g i v e n a v o l u n t e e r package t h a t c o n t a i n e d t h e f o l l o w i n g m a t e r i a l s : two c o p i e s o f c o n s e n t forms, an agreement form t o be s i g n e d b y t h e v o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r , i n t e r v i e w i n g and t r a n s c r i b i n g t i p s , p r o c e d u r e s f o r Queering the Pacific Northwest 42 conducting o r a l h i s t o r y interviews, a t r a n s c r i p t index form, interview questions, and a brochure describing the project. I spoke d i r e c t l y with each interviewer about her/his r o l e and r e s p o n s i b i l i t i e s and explained the type of administrative or emotional support that she/he could expect from me. Other than written materials, the interviewer had access to tape recorders and transcribers provided by the Asian Counseling and R e f e r r a l Service and by the Wing Luke Asian Museum. Audiotapes were used to record a l l interviews. The opening l e t t e r to the interviewers c l e a r l y stated our deadlines as the interviews had to be conducted and transcribed within four weeks. I encouraged the interviewers to take notes during t h e i r interviews and to t r y to transcribe them themselves. Although t h i s process would, of course, be time-consuming, the interviewer would be i n a better p o s i t i o n than anyone else to remember the tone, atmosphere, and dynamic of the interview and so could be expected to provide a more s e n s i t i v e accounting of i t . In the guidelines provided to the interviewers I offered suggestions concerning l i s t e n i n g s k i l l s , how to transcribe interviews, and what procedures to use when conducting them. I compiled the volunteer package i n consultation with the Working Advisory Committee members and with Ron Chew, the d i r e c t o r of the Wing Luke Asian Museum. Based on the assumption that the act of interviewing has d i f f e r e n t meanings for d i f f e r e n t people, I was c a r e f u l to present t h i s process within a feminist framework. For example, the interviewer was to be aware of her/his values and a t t i t u d e s p e r t a i n i n g to "class, sexual i d e n t i t y p o l i t i c s , r a c i a l p o l i t i c s , age, health issues, language and c u l t u r a l t r a d i t i o n s . " 1 5 Our values always inform our actions and words, and these can e a s i l y become assumptions that determine the nature of our questions. I t was my hope that the guidelines would be used to r a i s e the interviewer's awareness of her/his own s u b j e c t i v i t y and of how that s u b j e c t i v i t y a f f e c t s her/his r o l e as an interviewer. Queering the Pacific Northwest 43 D u r i n g t h e p r o c e s s o f c o m p i l i n g i n f o r m a t i o n f o r v o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r s , I r e l i e d on f e m i n i s t a p p roaches t o i n t e r v i e w i n g . I t o o k a p a r t i c i p a t o r y a p p r o a c h t o t h e i n t e r v i e w e r - n a r r a t o r r e l a t i o n s h i p and t o th e p o s s i b i l i t y o f c o n s c i o u s o r u n c o n s c i o u s e x p l o i t a t i v e b e h a v i o u r on th e p a r t o f t h e i n t e r v i e w e r . F o r example, I was aware o f t h e f a c t t h a t an i n t e r v i e w e r m i ght have known t h e n a r r a t o r w i t h i n a c e r t a i n c o n t e x t p r i o r t o t h e i n t e r v i e w . These two p e o p l e c o u l d , f o r example, have known each o t h e r w i t h i n a r o m a n t i c c o n t e x t o r w i t h i n a community o r g a n i z i n g c o n t e x t , t h u s h a v i n g c e r t a i n t e n s i o n s o r c o n f l i c t s . I u r g e d t h e v o l u n t e e r s t o be h o n e s t and open about d i s c u s s i n g t h e s e p o s s i b l e s c e n a r i o s . F u r t h e r m o r e , as I have s a i d , i n our homophobic s o c i e t y t h e theme o f coming out i s an e x t r e m e l y s e n s i t i v e one. The words o f t h e n a r r a t o r c o u l d e a s i l y be h e l d a g a i n s t h e r / h i m and c o u l d r e s u l t i n v e r b a l harassment and p h y s i c a l v i o l e n c e . T h e r e f o r e , t h e i n t e r v i e w e r s needed t o make i t c l e a r t o t h e n a r r a t o r s t h a t t h e c o n t e n t s o f t h e i n t e r v i e w s would be a c c e s s i b l e t o t h e p u b l i c . The i n t e r v i e w q u e s t i o n s t h a t I d e v i s e d c o v e r e d a v a r i e t y o f t o p i c s , from p e r s o n a l i n f o r m a t i o n t o s p e c i f i c i s s u e s (see A p p e n d i x E, I n t e r v i e w Q u e s t i o n s ) . The l i s t of q u e s t i o n s was i n t e n d e d t o h e l p t h e i n t e r v i e w e r p r e p a r e f o r t h e i n t e r v i e w as w e l l as t o d e f i n e a r e a s o f p a r t i c u l a r i m p o r t a n c e . I n t h e g u i d e l i n e s I p o i n t e d o ut t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f open-ended q u e s t i o n s and c a u t i o n e d a g a i n s t u n w i t t i n g l y a s k i n g l e a d i n g q u e s t i o n s (see A p p e n d i x E, I n t e r v i e w Q u e s t i o n s ) . A l l v o l u n t e e r i n t e r v i e w e r s r e p o r t e d h a v i n g c o n d u c t e d one- t o two-hour i n t e r v i e w s w i t h each i n t e r v i e w s u b j e c t as w e l l as h a v i n g s p e n t a r e m a r k a b l e number o f ho u r s t r a n s c r i b i n g t h e t a p e s . I can s t i l l r e c a l l t h e f r u s t r a t e d remarks made by v o l u n t e e r s when t h e y r e a l i z e d t h e y had t o r e c o r d e v e r y "eh" o r "ah" and e v e r y moment of s i l e n c e t h a t o c c u r r e d d u r i n g t h e i r i n t e r v i e w . s e s s i o n s . However, some v o l u n t e e r s a l s o f e l t t h a t t h e e x e r c i s e o f t r a n s c r i b i n g t h e t a p e s made them c o n s c i o u s o f t h e i r i n t e r v i e w i n g t e c h n i q u e s as w e l l as of t h e s u b t l e t i e s c o n t a i n e d w i t h i n 1 5 Quote taken from "Guidelines for Interviewer & Transcribing Tips." Queering the Pacific Northwest 44 the narratives. I i n s i s t e d that the narrators' words be taken down verbatim, with no grammatical corrections or changes to s t y l e of speech. Once again, my reasoning was based on feminist research into the interviewing and recording of interview data. As part of the process i n f i n a l i z i n g the narratives, I gave each narrator the d r a f t version of the text and asked for her/his feedback. I was responsible for s e l e c t i n g the t r a n s c r i p t s that would be used i n the exhibit, and I d i d so based on the s e l e c t i o n c r i t e r i a mentioned e a r l i e r i n t h i s chapter. I d i d not face as many questions regarding the s e l e c t i o n process as I thought I would. In fact, upon g i v i n g the Working Advisory Committee my reasons for s e l e c t i n g c e r t a i n people and not others, I was not asked to defend my choices at a l l . To t h i s day, I do not know why I was not challenged on my decisions. Even though i t i s f l a t t e r i n g that the committee members trusted my a b i l i t y to "do the job r i g h t , " I wish there had been more discussion around my choices. I r e c a l l being nervous at the meeting and waiting to be g r i l l e d . However, t h i s simply d i d not happen. The next step for me was to edit the interviews and send them back to the narrators for t h e i r comments. I d i d not have the interviewers help with e d i t i n g the t r a n s c r i p t s because I f e l t that, given i t took them at least ten hours to transcribe the interviews, i t would be too much to ask. This was e s p e c i a l l y true for those interviewers who were also part of the Working Advisory Committee. In hindsight, I see that i t would have been valuable to s o l i c i t t h e i r help and feedback when e d i t i n g the narratives. With the exception of one person (who rewrote the e n t i r e interview and resubmitted i t ) , the narrators r e s t r i c t e d t h e i r comments to grammatical corrections and minor changes. Most of the interviews were revised twice before being accepted by both the narrator and myself, at which point they were submitted to the Working Advisory Committee for feedback. At the same time, we conducted photo-shoots with each narrator and Queering the Pacific Northwest 45 the f a m i l y members of t h e i r choice. I t i s common f o r a gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgendered person to remain i n the c l o s e t because s/he i s a f r a i d of l o s i n g f a m i l y t i e s . In p a r t i c u l a r , i f s/he i s dependent upon the f a m i l y f o r immigration or finances, the act of coming out means j e o p a r d i z i n g h e r / h i s l i v e l i h o o d . I t i s not uncommon f o r a gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgendered person to be forced to sever b i o l o g i c a l f a m i l y t i e s and to seek emotional support from f r i e n d s . The t r a d i t i o n a l nuclear f a m i l y i s not always conducive to the w e l l - b e i n g of queer persons. Therefore, i n r e c o g n i t i o n of these o b s t a c l e s , the p r o j e c t organizers made i t c l e a r that both b i o l o g i c a l and n o n - b i o l o g i c a l f a m i l y members were most welcome to take part i n the photo shoot. Where the p o r t r a i t s were to be shot, and how the subjects were to be portrayed, was negotiated between our photographer and the n a r r a t o r s . The number and s i z e of the photos to be in c l u d e d i n the e x h i b i t was l e f t e n t i r e l y to our graphic designer. I navigated my m u l t i p l e s e l v e s between the photographer and the designer, p a r t i c i p a t i n g i n nine photo sessions and two l a t e - n i g h t design sessions. My purpose i n appearing at the photo sessions was to f u r t h e r introduce myself to the n a r r a t o r s , f o r I had met none of them p r i o r to t h i s p r o j e c t . I was conscious that my presence may have been somewhat d i s r u p t i v e and was c a r e f u l to stay out of any conversations concerned w i t h photo compositions. The l a t e - n i g h t design sessions were mostly concerned w i t h p r o v i d i n g w r i t t e n t e x t to the graphic designer, i n p a r t i c u l a r regarding the production of the souvenir booklet that was to be ready f o r the e x h i b i t ' s opening r e c e p t i o n . A f t e r a n a r r a t o r confirmed h e r / h i s w i l l i n g n e s s to p a r t i c i p a t e i n the e x h i b i t , I would l o c a t e a volunteer i n t e r v i e w e r and o b t a i n an agreement from both p a r t i e s . The volunteer i n t e r v i e w e r would agree to i n t e r v i e w the n a r r a t o r , and the l a t t e r would agree to be interviewed by the former. Most of the people were interviewed by whomever had made i n i t i a l contact w i t h them. The i n t e r v i e w e r would f i l l out the T r a n s c r i p t Index Form and w r i t e an a b s t r a c t of the i n t e r v i e w (see Appendix D, Queering the Pacific Northwest 46 T r a n s c r i p t I ndex Form). Each i n t e r v i e w e r e x p l a i n e d t o me i n d e t a i l how t h e i n t e r v i e w went and how she/he f e l t about i t . Twelve i n t e r v i e w e r s c o n d u c t e d twenty-one i n t e r v i e w s . P r i o r t o t h e i n t e r v i e w , t h e n a r r a t o r s i g n e d t h e Consent Form f o r I n t e r v i e w S u b j e c t / N a r r a t o r (See A p p e n d i x F, Consent Form f o r I n t e r v i e w S u b j e c t / N a r r a t o r ) . I n s i g n i n g t h i s form, she/he gave t h e p r o j e c t o r g a n i z e r s " p e r m i s s i o n t o use t h e c o n t e n t s o f [the] i n t e r v i e w s , whether t a p e - r e c o r d e d o r o t h e r w i s e , f o r such s c h o l a r l y and e d u c a t i o n a l p u r p o s e s as t h e A d v i s o r y Committee o f t h e E x h i b i t i o n s h a l l d e t e r m i n e , i n c l u d i n g l i t e r a r y p u b l i c a t i o n . " 1 6 We a l s o r e q u e s t e d p e r m i s s i o n t o use t h e pho t o g r a p h s (whether t a k e n by t h e p h o t o g r a p h e r o r g i v e n t o us by t h e n a r r a t o r ) i n t h e e x h i b i t . I i n c l u d e d i n t h e c o n s e n t form a p a r a g r a p h on th e p o s s i b i l i t y o f e x c l u d i n g i n t e r v i e w s i n t h e f i n a l s t a g e o f t h e p r o j e c t . B a s i c a l l y , I wanted t o e x p l a i n c l e a r l y t h a t n o t a l l i n t e r v i e w s w o u l d be i n c l u d e d . Due t o b u d g e t a r y c o n s t r a i n t s , t h e e x h i b i t was l i m i t e d t o t w e l v e p a n e l s . 1 7 T h i s b e i n g t h e c a s e , d i v e r s i t y became t h e main c r i t e r i o n upon w h i c h I b a s e d my d e c i s i o n s r e g a r d i n g what t o i n c l u d e i n t h e e x h i b i t . The c h o i c e o f p h o t o g r a p h s r e m a i n e d w i t h Zone Montoya, t h e p h o t o g r a p h e r . P r o j e c t Development: The L a t e r Stage I n September t h e s t a f f f i n a l i z e d t h e s e l e c t i o n o f i n t e r v i e w s , t h e e d i t i n g o f n a r r a t i v e s , and t h e p r i n t i n g o f pho t o p o r t r a i t s . As t h e d a t e f o r t h e e x h i b i t ' s o p e n i n g got c l o s e r , T r a c y worked f i f t e e n - h o u r days t o f i n i s h t h e l a y o u t d e s i g n f o r t h e p a n e l s and t h e s o u v e n i r b o o k l e t , w h i c h was t o be o f f e r e d a t t h e o p e n i n g r e c e p t i o n a t t h e Wing Luke A s i a n Museum. The f o u r t e e n - p a g e b o o k l e t i n c l u d e d i n f o r m a t i o n on how t h e e x h i b i t came about, f e a t u r e d s e l e c t e d p h o t o g r a p h s o f t h e n a r r a t o r s , and 1 6 Quote taken from the Consent Form for Interview Subject/Narrator. Queering the Pacific Northwest 47 gave p r o f i l e s o f p a r t i c i p a n t s and o r g a n i z e r s . I t a l s o p r o v i d e d a comprehensive l i s t o f API and A P I - s u p p o r t i v e l e s b i a n , gay, b i s e x u a l , and t r a n s g e n d e r e d o r g a n i z a t i o n s . F o l l o w i n g t h e l a s t W o r k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee m e e t i n g , committee members were a s k e d t o f i l l o u t an e v a l u a t i o n form f o r t h e p r o j e c t (See A p p e n d i x G, E v a l u a t i o n Form). A t a b l e o f expenses and a b r i e f memo were l a t e r m a i l e d t o them t o den o t e my d e p a r t u r e as p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r (See A p p e n d i x H, F i n a l Memo). The f i r s t p u b l i c showing o f Leaving Silence: Queer Asian and P a c i f i c Islander Oral History Exhibit t o o k p l a c e on 7 O c t o b e r 1996 ( a p p r o p r i a t e l y enough, i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s , O c t o b e r i s N a t i o n a l Coming Out Month) on t h e main f l o o r o f t h e downtown S e a t t l e P u b l i c L i b r a r y . The op e n i n g r e c e p t i o n was s c h e d u l e d t h i r t e e n days l a t e r and was h e l d a t t h e Wing Luke A s i a n Museum. Speakers a t t h e r e c e p t i o n i n c l u d e d : Thomas Gamble ( c h a i r o f t h e Leaving Silence Working A d v i s o r y Committee), Ted L o r d ( e x e c u t i v e d i r e c t o r o f P r i d e F o u n d a t i o n ) , t h e H o n o u r a b l e Velum V e l o u r . (Washington S t a t e r e p r e s e n t a t i v e , 1 1 t h D i s t r i c t ) , and C a s s i e C h i n n ( e x h i b i t c o o r d i n a t o r o f t h e Wing Luke A s i a n Museum). The o p e n i n g became a community e v e n t t h a t b r o u g h t t o g e t h e r p a r t i c i p a n t s , o r g a n i z e r s , and a u d i e n c e s i n a c e l e b r a t i o n o f t h e e x h i b i t . One hund r e d and s e v e n t y -s i x p e o p l e s i g n e d i n a t t h e o p e n i n g r e c e p t i o n , some coming from as f a r away as Anchorage, Los A n g e l e s , and New York . The e x h i b i t was moved t o Cunningham H a l l a t t h e U n i v e r s i t y o f Washington Women's C e n t e r on 30 Oc t o b e r , where i t r e m a i n e d on d i s p l a y u n t i l 13 November. F o r t h e month o f December i t was shown a t t h e H e a r t -T o - A r t G a l l e r y i n Broadway M a r k e t , a t r e n d y and q u e e r - p o s i t i v e a r e a i n S e a t t l e . By J a n u a r y 1997, Leaving Silence was t u r n e d o v e r t o t h e E x h i b i t T o u r i n g S e r v i c e s a t E a s t e r n Washington U n i v e r s i t y and became a 1 7 The Pride Foundation funding proposal only listed four panels for the display. Further fund-raising efforts by advisory committee members and the staff team made it possible for us to mount a twelve-panel display. Queering the Pacific Northwest 48 n a t i o n a l t r a v e l l i n g e x h i b i t . 1 8 I n C h a p t e r 4, " D i f f e r e n c e s w i t h Queer A s i a n I d e n t i t y : N a r r a t i v e s and Images o f I d e n t i t y - M a k i n g , " I p r o v i d e an a n a l y s i s o f c e r t a i n r e c u r r e n t themes i n th e n a r r a t i v e s . I t h e n go on t o examine t h e pho t o g r a p h s and t o d e t e r m i n e t h e i r p l a c e i n our i m a g e - f i l l e d s o c i e t y . 18 Leaving Silence has since been on display at the University of Ohio and various locations in Portland, Oregon. Touring reports have been hard to trace since the person responsible for our exhibit, Jim Rosengrun, left the Exhibit Touring Services. I had a conversation with him prior to his departure, and he mentioned that touring reports were sent to the Asian Pacific AIDS Council (APAC). However, when I talked with employees of APAC, they did not know of the existence of such reports. APAC eventually became a program within the International District Health Services and relocated its office. Following the closing date of the contract, Leaving Silence was returned to APAC. Currently, the exhibit remains in storage in Seattle, Washington. Its next engagement was Lotus Roots 3: A Queer Pan-Asian Conference, which was held in May 2000 in Seattle, Washington. Queering the Pacific Northwest 49 CHAPTER 4: DIFFERENCES WITH QUEER ASIAN IDENTITY: NARRATIVES AND IMAGES OF IDENTITY-MAKING I d e n t i t i e s a r e t o be de m o n s t r a t e d . C h i n e s e has been d e m o n s t r a t e d t o h e r . She may de m o n s t r a t e C h i n e s e n e s s i f she wants t o , i n m e l a n c h o l i c a u t h e n t i c a t i o n . 1 9 -- K a r l y n Koh The s p e c i f i c i t i e s i n i d e n t i t i e s a r e e s s e n t i a l t o t h e e x e r c i s e o f i d e n t i t y - f o r m a t i o n t h r o u g h p u b l i c p e d a g o g i e s . I n e x a m i n i n g t h e n a r r a t i v e s and ph o t o g r a p h s d i s p l a y e d i n Leaving Silence, t h i s c h a p t e r c r i t i c a l l y examines t h e r a c i a l i z e d , gendered, s o c i a l , c u l t u r a l , and p o l i t i c a l a s p e c t s o f b e i n g queer and A s i a n . The Leaving Silence n a r r a t i v e s s e r v e t o de m o n s t r a t e t h e c o m p l e x i t i e s o f a wide a r r a y o f i s s u e s . They i n c l u d e t h e l a c k o f a language t o a d d r e s s queer s e x u a l i t y , c u l t u r a l b a r r i e r s t o coming o u t , t h e e x p e r i e n c e s o f b e i n g m u l t i r a c i a l and queer, and t h e r e l a t i o n s h i p between s e l f - e s t e e m and coming o u t . F o u r p a r t i c u l a r i s s u e s r e c u r most o f t e n t h r o u g h o u t t h e i n t e r v i e w s (1) g e n e r a t i o n a l d i f f e r e n c e s w i t h r e g a r d t o t h e use of t h e word "queer," (2) t h e r e l a t i o n s h i p between achievement and f a m i l y a c c e p t a n c e , (3) b e i n g i n - b e t w e e n , and (4) r e l i g i o n . They p r o v i d e t h e b a s i s o f d i s c u s s i o n f o r t h i s c h a p t e r . G e n e r a t i o n a l D i f f e r e n c e s w i t h Regard t o t h e Use of t h e Word "Queer" T r a d i t i o n a l l y , t h e word "queer" s u g g e s t s e c c e n t r i c i t y and s t r a n g e n e s s . I t i s o n l y w i t h i n t h e l a s t decade t h a t t h i s word has become a ter m i n c l u s i v e o f l e s b i a n s , gay men, t r a n s g e n d e r i n d i v i d u a l s , and b i s e x u a l s . Embraced by y o u t h a c t i v i s t s , t h e t e r m s i g n i f i e s "a s t r a t e g y , an a t t i t u d e , a r e f e r e n c e t o o t h e r i d e n t i t i e s and a new s e l f -u n d e r s t a n d i n g " (Smyth 1992, 20). The term "queer" a l s o s i g n i f i e s a d i s t r u s t o f governments and s t a t e i n s t i t u t i o n s . Most queer a c t i v i s t s b e l i e v e i n d i r e c t - a c t i o n s t r a t e g i e s t o convey t h e i r s o c i a l and p o l i t i c a l 1 9 Karlyn Koh, "Yours Truly," West Coast Line (Burnaby: Simon Fraser University, 1998), 23-27. Queering the Pacific Northwest 50 message. Queer Nation, a group formed i n A p r i l 1990 i n response to gay and lesbian bashings i n East V i l l a g e , New York, developed these str a t e g i e s . Members of the group used s t e n c i l s and wrote on pavements "Queers Bash Back" and "My beloved was queerbashed here. Queers f i g h t back" (Smyth 1992, 17). In other words, adopting queerness as an i d e n t i t y means being upfront about sexual i d e n t i t y . Two narrators, E r i c Ishino (a f o r t y - s i x - y e a r - o l d gay Japanese administrative services manager) and Karen Maeda Allman (a forty-two-year-old Asian lesbian doctoral candidate i n nursing), commented on how t h e i r membership i n an e a r l i e r generation a f f e c t e d how they viewed the word "queer." Interviewer: What does the term or terms "queer" and "Asian" mean to you? E r i c Ishino: Well I guess I've never been comfortable with the word "queer." E r i c went on to l i n k h i s feeli n g s of discomfort to h i s i d e n t i t y as an older gay man. , I guess i t ' s l i k e being older than a l o t of the Asians who i d e n t i f y themselves as gay. I t ' s very t y p i c a l [that, as] older gays and lesbians ... [we] always heard that ... term used [in a derogatory way when we were] growing up. So that i t ' s kind of d i f f i c u l t to c a l l myself a queer Asian ... I don't have a very strong i d e n t i f i c a t i o n as a queer Asian. I guess [I id e n t i f y ] more just as a gay man. Karen f e l t s i m i l a r l y to E r i c with regard to generational diff e r e n c e and the a t t i t u d e towards the word "queer." However, she d i d discuss the benefits of using i t as an umbrella term. I know some folk s of my generation, even now, don't i d e n t i f y as queer. But I l i k e the inclusiveness of [the term]. [I l i k e i t that i t includes] transgendered people and bisexual people. Oh, [I know that] i t ' s an epithet [that's used] against people. You know, l i k e "you queer," or "you dyke," or "you fag," you know. And some people f e e l l i k e you can reclaim that word and other people don't think you can reclaim [ i t because] i t ' s been used against you i n a hateful way. But I kind of l i k e i t 'cause, to me, i t speaks to greater v i s i b i l i t y i n the eighties and ni n e t i e s ... I [think] that [the] queer generation's cool, [even though], you know, i t wasn't my Queering the Pacific Northwest 51 g e n e r a t i o n . A l t h o u g h E r i c and Karen were c l o s e i n age, t h e i r d i f f e r e n t p r o f e s s i o n s and l i f e e x p e r i e n c e s h e l p t o e x p l a i n why Karen was more a c c e p t i n g o f t h e te r m "queer" t h a n was E r i c . I d e n t i f y i n g as a hapa woman (Japanese and European A m e r i c a n a n c e s t r y ) , K a r e n a l w a y s f e l t m a r g i n a l i n Tucson, A r i z o n a , where i n t e r - r a c i a l m a r r i a g e s were a c c e p t a b l e n e i t h e r t o Japanese A m e r i c a n communities n o r t o t h e l a r g e r European A m e r i c a n c o m m u n i t i e s . I n c o n t r a s t , E r i c went t o e l e m e n t a r y and h i g h s c h o o l s t h a t had h i g h p e r c e n t a g e s o f A s i a n A m e r i c a n and A f r i c a n A m e r i c a n s t u d e n t s . A l t h o u g h v i s i b i l i t y as a gay man was c e r t a i n l y i m p o r t a n t t o him, i t may n o t have had t h e same degree o f u r g e n c y as i t d i d f o r K a r e n . I n a d d i t i o n , E r i c and Ka r e n were i n v o l v e d i n v e r y d i f f e r e n t p o l i t i c a l a r e n a s . K a r e n worked as a b o o k s e l l e r f o r a wo r k e r -owned c o o p e r a t i v e b o o k s t o r e , and she s e t up d i s p l a y s a t v a r i o u s d o m e s t i c v i o l e n c e c o n f e r e n c e s , l i t e r a c y e v e n t s , and/or c u l t u r a l f e s t i v a l s . T h i s meant t h a t K a r e n , u n l i k e E r i c , was exposed t o p e o p l e (and l i t e r a t u r e ) who us e d t h e te r m "queer" i n a n o n - d e r o g a t o r y manner. E r i c , on t h e o t h e r hand, was i n v o l v e d i n e l e c t o r a l p o l i t i c s (he s u p p o r t e d C a i Anders o n , h i s l i f e p a r t n e r , who i s t h e D e m o c r a t i c r e p r e s e n t a t i v e f o r Washington S t a t e ) , p a r t i c i p a t e d i n D e m o c r a t i c p a r t y o r g a n i z a t i o n s and f u n d - r a i s i n g a c t i v i t i e s . T h i s i s n o t a venue w i t h i n w h i c h one would e n c o u n t e r t h e easy and p o s i t i v e use of t h e term "queer." And, of c o u r s e , E r i c m e n t i o n e d g r o w i n g up h e a r i n g t h e term u s e d i n a d e r o g a t o r y manner. I n K a r e n and E r i c we s e e how v a r i o u s f a c t o r s can a f f e c t i n d i v i d u a l f e e l i n g s about t h e a p p r o p r i a t e n e s s o f t h e te r m "queer" as an u m b r e l l a term f o r A s i a n l e s b i a n s , gays, b i s e x u a l s , and t r a n s g e n d e r p e r s o n s . I n d e s c r i b i n g Leaving Silence as a queer A s i a n e x h i b i t , t h e o r g a n i z e r s assumed a common u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f t h e word "queer," and we use d i t as a r e f e r e n t f o r and an i d e n t i f i e r o f o u r s e x u a l i d e n t i t y . We c h o s e . i t because o f i t s i n c l u s i v e n e s s , b u t t h e comments o f p e o p l e l i k e Queering the Pacific Northwest 52 E r i c and K a r e n f o r c e d us t o a s k whether we were b e i n g s e n s i t i v e t o t h e word's d e r o g a t o r y c o n n o t a t i o n s , i t s h i s t o r y , and t h e p a i n a s s o c i a t e d w i t h i t . Our a s s u m p t i o n t h a t "queer" was an a p p r o p r i a t e d e s c r i p t o r f o r t h e e x h i b i t was i n d i c a t i v e o f t h e f a c t t h a t we were i n o u r m i d - t w e n t i e s and e a r l y t h i r t i e s (I was t w e n t y - f o u r ) ; t h a t we were "out and p r o u d " w i t h i n a N o r t h A m e r i c a n c o n t e x t ; and t h a t we were w e l l e d u c a t e d , m i d d l e -c l a s s , p a i d community w o r k e r s . Our d e s i r e t o r e c l a i m t h e word "queer" and t o d e f y t h o s e who w o u l d use i t i n a d e r o g a t o r y f a s h i o n was s t r o n g amongst u s. We f e l t t h a t we were r e a d y , as an o r g a n i z i n g committee, t o c h a l l e n g e API communities and t h e w i d e r gay p o p u l a t i o n s . We a l s o had t h e p a s s i o n and t h e commitment t o c a r r y out a v i s i b i l i t y campaign such as Leaving Silence. We were d e f i n i t e l y e m b r a c i n g r e b e l l i o n when we o p e n l y p r o c l a i m e d t h a t we were queer and A s i a n . P e r v e e n A l i , a t w e n t y - s e v e n - y e a r - o l d b i s e x u a l B a n g l a d e s h i - A m e r i c a n a c t i v i s t , f e l t t h a t i d e n t i f y i n g as queer e n a b l e d h e r t o l o c a t e h e r b i s e x u a l i t y w i t h i n b r o a d e r l e s b i a n and gay co m m u n i t i e s . F o r h e r , u s i n g t h e word "queer" was a p o l i t i c a l s t a t e m e n t . Yeah. I c a l l m y s e l f queer, and I do t h a t f o r v e r y p o l i t i c a l r e a s o n s because I t h i n k t h e r e ' s so much " b i " - p h o b i a w i t h i n t h e l e s b i a n and gay community. I t ' s a way of f o r c i n g v i s i b i l i t y of b i s e x u a l i t y i n t o q u e e r agendas and f o r c i n g p e o p l e t o r e c o g n i z e t h a t i t ' s a n o t h e r s e x u a l i d e n t i t y . K a r e n Maeda A l l m a n went one s t e p f u r t h e r and p r o b l e m a t i z e d q u e e r n e s s as a p r i m a r y s e x u a l i d e n t i t y . Um, to. me, b e i n g queer and A s i a n , um, I don't t h i n k t h e r e ' s any s u c h t h i n g as b e i n g p l a i n queer. You know, t h e r e ' s a l w a y s some s o r t o f gender p i e c e t o i t , and t h e r e ' s a l w a y s some s o r t of r a c i a l / e t h n i c p i e c e t h a t ' s h a p p e n i n g a l o n g w i t h i t and t h a t r e a l l y k i n d o f f l a v o u r s one's queer e x p e r i e n c e . Y e t how does c l a i m i n g a "queer" i d e n t i t y measure up t o o t h e r a n t i -o p p r e s s i o n work? A l t h o u g h a c c e p t i n g t h e p o l i t i c a l r a d i c a l i s m a s s o c i a t e d w i t h t h e t e r m "queer," some a c t i v i s t s q u e s t i o n e d i t s c l a i m t o be an " a l l - e m b r a c i n g term." I t i s t r u e t h a t t h e i d e a o f b e i n g queer b r o u g h t a Queering the Pacific Northwest 53 sense o f f r e s h n e s s and e x c i t e m e n t t o ' a n t i - h o m o p h o b i a and AIDS-phobia work. W h i l e government s t r u c t u r e s and media i n s t i t u t i o n s were n o t a c c e s s i b l e t o e v e r y o n e , queer a c t i v i s t s b r o u g h t t h e s e s o c i a l messages.to p u b l i c a t t e n t i o n t h r o u g h " i n - y o u r - f a c e " i n t e r v e n t i o n s . No l o n g e r were gay a c t i v i s t s and AIDS a c t i v i s t s w a i t i n g f o r government and m e d i c a l systems t o change; t h e y were t u r n i n g t o queer a c t i v i s t s f o r s o l u t i o n s . But a c t i v i s t s o f c o l o u r p r o b l e m a t i z e d t h e s i m i l a r i t i e s between queer i d e n t i t y and gay i d e n t i t y . They a s k e d t h e c r u c i a l q u e s t i o n o f whether queer p o l i t i c s a d d r e s s e s t h e complex i s s u e s o f r a c e and c l a s s . L e s b i a n a c t i v i s t s wanted t o know whether f i g h t i n g s e x i s m was on t h e queer agenda. I n a b o o k l e t e n t i t l e d Lesbians Talk Queer Notions, C h e r y l Smyth (1992) b r o u g h t t o g e t h e r a c t i v i s t s from a l l w a l k s o f l i f e t o d i s c u s s t h e te r m "queer" and i t s i m p l i c a t i o n s f o r a n t i - o p p r e s s i o n movements. One of t h e s e a c t i v i s t s was Suzanne Moore, a j o u r n a l i s t and w r i t e r , who was c o n c e r n e d about queer p o l i t i c s b e i n g p r e s e n t e d as "on t h e edge" (Smyth 1992, 3 4 ) . B e i n g a mother, she wondered whether t h e i s s u e o f c h i l d c a r e w o u l d be seen as e x c i t i n g enough t o be c o n s i d e r e d a queer i s s u e . F ilmmaker and l e s b i a n o f c o l o u r a c t i v i s t P r a t i b h a Parmar c a u t i o n e d a g a i n s t a c c e p t i n g an " a l l - e m b r a c i n g term" when most of t h e c o a l i t i o n work amongst and between communities o f c o l o u r and " w h i t e " o r g a n i z a t i o n s has n o t y e t been c o m p l e t e d ( 3 1 ) . T h i s work s t i l l needs t o be done, and t r u s t needs t o be b u i l t b e f o r e t h e d i v e r s e l e s b i a n and gay communities can come t o g e t h e r and work under an u m b r e l l a • t e r m s u c h as "queer." The p r a c t i c e o f r e c l a i m i n g words i s common among gay and l e s b i a n c ommunities i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s and o t h e r p a r t s o f t h e w o r l d . F o r example, S o u t h A s i a n gays and l e s b i a n s i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s use t h e H i n d i and Urdu word "khush" t o r e f e r t o t h e i r s e x u a l i d e n t i t i e s . The word i t s e l f means h a p p i n e s s , b u t i t has been r e c r e a t e d t o s t a n d f o r b e i n g gay and f o r b e i n g i n a s t a t e o f e c s t a s y . L i k e w i s e , a 1985 South A s i a n l e s b i a n c o l l e c t i v e formed i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s uses t h e S a n s k r i t word "anamika," w h i c h means "nameless," t o r e f e r t o t h e r e l a t i o n s h i p Queering the Pacific Northwest 54 between two women (Eng and Horn 1998, 141-42). Hong Kong gay a c t i v i s t s have a d o p t e d t h e term "comrade" t o a d d r e s s each o t h e r . D u r i n g t h e C u l t u r a l R e v o l u t i o n , r e f e r r i n g t o a n o t h e r p e r s o n as "comrade" was a way of d e m o n s t r a t i n g f r i e n d s h i p , l o y a l t y , and a commitment t o t h e C h i n e s e Communist P a r t y . I n a p p r o p r i a t i n g t h i s word, Hong Kong qu e e r s a r e making a s e r i o u s a t t e m p t t o e s t a b l i s h t h e l e g i t i m a c y o f t h e i r s e x u a l i t y . When t h e r e i s no a p p r o p r i a t e language, t h e c a l l t o c r e a t e one becomes u r g e n t . P e r v e e n c l e a r l y e x p r e s s e d t h i s u r g e n c y : And I t h i n k c r e a t i n g language i s v e r y i m p o r t a n t . I t ' s t h e f i r s t f orm of r e s i s t a n c e . I t ' s s p e a k i n g o u t . I t ' s g i v i n g v o i c e t o t h e s e t h i n g s [and] making them v i s i b l e . From t h e r e you can use t h a t l a n g u a g e t o work f o r i n s t i t u t i o n a l change and p e r s o n a l change as w e l l . A s u p p o r t pamphlet f o r E a s t and S o u t h e a s t A s i a n l e s b i a n s , gays, and b i s e x u a l s (as w e l l as t h e i r f a m i l i e s and f r i e n d s ) i s e n t i t l e d Facing Out Together. The pamphlet was p a r t of a s e r i e s of a n t i - h o m o p h o b i a community p r o j e c t s o r g a n i z e d by t h e A s i a n S o c i e t y f o r t h e I n t e r v e n t i o n of AIDS. The p a m p h l e t ' s p l a n n i n g committee t a l k e d about " f a c i n g o u t " r a t h e r t h a n "coming o u t . " The t e r m "coming o u t " i s b a s e d on a m a i n s t r e a m N o r t h A m e r i c a n / E n g l i s h u n d e r s t a n d i n g of coming t o terms w i t h one's s e x u a l i t y , and i t does n o t a d d r e s s t h e i s s u e of " f a c e , " w h i c h i s c r u c i a l t o t h e coming out p r o c e s s e x p e r i e n c e d by E a s t and S o u t h e a s t A s i a n s . Man C h u i Leung, t h e p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r o f Facing Out Together, i n t r o d u c e s t h e " c o n c e p t s of f a c i n g out and f a c i n g out t o g e t h e r " : Two terms were u s e d because many p a r t i c i p a n t s i n t h e p r o j e c t d e s c r i b e d a p r o c e s s t h a t c o n s i s t e d of two main p a r t s : coming t o terms w i t h one's own s e x u a l o r i e n t a t i o n , and t e l l i n g o t h e r s about our s e x u a l o r i e n t a t i o n . U n l i k e t h e t e r m "coming o u t , " " f a c i n g o u t " encompasses t h e e x p e r i e n c e o f coming, t o terms w i t h one's own s e x u a l o r i e n t a t i o n , and " f a c i n g o u t t o g e t h e r " encompasses our s u p p o r t n e t w o r k s and p e o p l e a r o u n d us l i k e our f a m i l i e s and f r i e n d s . " F a c i n g out t o g e t h e r " i m p l i e s " f a c i n g o u t " with o t h e r s , n o t j u s t " f a c i n g o u t " to o t h e r s . I t a l s o i m p l i e s a n e c e s s a r y d i a l o g u e because we a r e a l l r e s p o n s i b l e [ f o r ] p r o v i d i n g a s u p p o r t i v e e n vironment by w o r k i n g towards Queering the Pacific Northwest 55 e l i m i n a t i n g a l l forms o f o p p r e s s i o n (Leung 1 9 9 6 ) . 2 0 The use of t h e t e r m " f a c i n g o u t " h e l p s t o r e d e f i n e what coming o ut means t o A s i a n l e s b i a n s , gays, b i s e x u a l s and t h e t r a n s g e n d e r e d . A t t h e same t i m e , i t e n a b l e s us t o c r i t i c a l l y examine o u r e v e r y d a y language and t o c h a l l e n g e t h e a s s u m p t i o n s b e h i n d i t : who do t h e y i n c l u d e and, more i m p o r t a n t , who do t h e y e x c l u d e ? The R e l a t i o n s h i p between Achievement and F a m i l y A c c e p t a n c e F o r t h o s e i n t e r v i e w e d f o r Leaving Silence, f a m i l y a c c e p t a n c e was an e s s e n t i a l p a r t o f n e g o t i a t i n g t h e i r s e x u a l and r a c i a l i z e d i d e n t i t y . Indeed, s e e k i n g ways t o g a i n f a m i l y a c c e p t a n c e o f t e n became a l i f e l o n g q u e s t . I n a l l s o c i e t i e s , a c h i e v e m e n t , however i t happens t o be d e f i n e d , i s p e r c e i v e d as a means o f g a i n i n g a c c e p t a n c e . A s i a n A m e r i c a n s have l o n g been "encouraged" t o t a k e on t h e r o l e of p r e s e n t i n g t h e m s e l v e s as a "model m i n o r i t y . " T h i s p a r t i c u l a r l y i n v i d i o u s s t e r e o t y p e f i r s t a p p e a r e d i n a New York Times Magazine a r t i c l e e n t i t l e d "Success S t o r y : Japanese A m e r i c a n S t y l e " on 6 J a n u a r y 1960. Comparing A f r i c a n A m e r i c a n s t o Japanese A m e r i c a n s , s o c i o l o g i s t W i l l i a m P e t e r s e n emphasized how Japanese c u l t u r a l v a l u e s and e t h i c s h e l p e d t o p r e v e n t them from b e i n g seen as a "problem m i n o r i t y . " As a r e s u l t , t h e "model m i n o r i t y " t h e o r y was use d t o m i n i m i z e t h e i m p o r t a n c e of c i v i l r i g h t s movements and t o p i t communities o f c o l o u r a g a i n s t one a n o t h e r . D u r i n g t h e 1970s and 1980s, t h e term t o o k on a d i f f e r e n t meaning as magazine a r t i c l e s and newspaper columns d e p i c t A s i a n A m e r i c a n s as a homogenous group o f o v e r - a c h i e v e r s . I n t h e 1980s, US p r e s i d e n t R o n a l d Reagan u s e d t h i s argument as t h e p r i m a r y r a t i o n a l e f o r c u t t i n g f u n d i n g f o r m i n o r i t y government programs. Nowadays, t h e "model m i n o r i t y " myth i s s t i l l b e i n g c o n t e s t e d w i t h i n t h e media, w h i l e A s i a n A m e r i c a n communities s t r u g g l e t o c r e a t e a s t r o n g e r 2 0 Education pamphlet published by Asian Society for the Intervention of AIDS in 1996. Man Chui Leung was the Project Coordinator and editor of the pamphlet titled Facing Out. Queering the Pacific Northwest 56 community i d e n t i t y . L i s a Lowe (1996, 6 ) , a c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s t h e o r i s t who w r i t e s e x t e n s i v e l y about how A s i a n i m m i g r a t i o n t o t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s formed t h a t n a t i o n ' s economic and p o l i t i c a l f o u n d a t i o n s , c r i t i c i z e s " t he a b s o r p t i o n of c u l t u r a l d i f f e r e n c e " i n v o l v e d i n l a b e l l i n g A s i a n A m e r i c a n s as t h e "model m i n o r i t y . " I n t h e language o f t h e s t a t e , A s i a n A m e r i c a n s c o n s t i t u t e a c u l t u r a l group t h a t has s u c c e s s f u l l y i n t e g r a t e d i n t o t h e "American way of l i f e . " As a r e s u l t , t h e m a i n s t r e a m v i e w s A s i a n A m e r i c a n p o p u l a t i o n s as one homogenous r a c i a l group, l a c k i n g any e t h n i c , l i n g u i s t i c , h i s t o r i c a l , and/or s o c i a l d i f f e r e n c e s . The l a b e l "model m i n o r i t y " i s more t h a n s i m p l y a u s e f u l t o o l f o r t h e s t a t e : i t a f f e c t s how A s i a n A m e r i c a n communities v i e w t h e m s e l v e s and how t h e y " m o n i t o r " t h e i r own b e h a v i o u r . S i m i l a r l y , D a v i d P a l u m b o - L i u , a s c h o l a r on c o m p a r a t i v e l i t e r a t u r e , comments on t h e s e p a r a t i o n o f A s i a n s as model m i n o r i t i e s i s i n e f f e c t "a s p e c i f i c mode of c o n t a i n m e n t " (1999, 4 ) . He f u r t h e r e x p l a i n s t h e A m e r i c a n e x p e c t a t i o n on A s i a n i m m i g r a n t s t o a p p l y t h e i r " C o n f u c i a n v a l u e s " t o l i v i n g and w o r k i n g i n A m e r i c a (1999, 21) . I n t h e i n t r o d u c t i o n t o CelebrAsian: Shared Lives, an Oral History of Gay Asians, t h e Gay A s i a n s T o r o n t o Book P r o j e c t Committee (Gay A s i a n s T o r o n t o 1996, v i i ) s h a r e d i t s i n s i g h t s i n t o t h e c o n s e r v a t i s m o f o v e r s e a s A s i a n c o m m u n i t i e s : " I n t h e f a c e o f v a r i o u s b a r r i e r s t o e q u a l i t y , A s i a n i m m i g r a n t s have r e a c t e d t o d i s c r i m i n a t i o n by q u i e t a v o i d a n c e o r by becoming a w e l l - b e h a v e d , c o n f o r m i n g 'model m i n o r i t y . ' " I n h i s i n t e r v i e w , E r i c I s h i n o t o l d o f j o i n i n g a c o l l e g e f r a t e r n i t y and, i n h i s r o l e as r u s h c h a i r m a n , r e c e i v i n g an award f o r r e c r u i t i n g new members. I n t e r e s t i n g l y enough, E r i c chose t o have h i s p h o t o p o r t r a i t t a k e n a t h i s p l a c e o f work -- t h e S e a t t l e C i t y C o u n c i l A d m i n i s t r a t i v e O f f i c e . One of t h e p h o t o s d e p i c t s him s i t t i n g under t h e C i t y o f S e a t t l e emblem i n t h e m e e t i n g room of t h e a d m i n i s t r a t i v e o f f i c e . T h i s p h o t o has an " o f f i c i a l " a i r t o i t , and i t s u g g e s t s t h a t E r i c ' s j o b , w h i c h i n v o l v e d b e i n g r e s p o n s i b l e f o r b u d g e t s and f i n a n c i a l m a t t e r s w i t h i n t h e Queering the Pacific Northwest 57 j u r i s d i c t i o n o f t h e S e a t t l e C i t y C o u n c i l , means a l o t t o him. Norma Timbang, a f o r t y - f o u r - y e a r - o l d F i l i p i n a b i s e x u a l mother o f two, m e n t i o n e d c a r e e r achievement when she d e s c r i b e d how t h e s i t u a t i o n of gay F i l i p i n o s has changed o v e r t h e y e a r s . There have been so many i m m i g r a n t s from t h e P h i l i p p i n e s and so many i m m i g r a n t s from o t h e r A s i a n c o u n t r i e s who a r e now so out t h a t ... many of them a r e v i s i b l e and own[] b u s i n e s s e s even. [They own] b u s i n e s s e s and [are] w o r k i n g i n communities on i s s u e s , s p e c i f i c i s s u e s . And many o f them have g o t t e n [ t o ] a space where t h e y ' v e been a c c e p t e d . I n o t h e r words, a c c e p t a n c e comes w i t h achievement -- i n t h i s c a s e , b e i n g a s u c c e s s f u l e n t r e p r e n e u r w i t h i n A m e r i c a n c a p i t a l i s t s o c i e t y . So h a v i n g one's gay l i f e s t y l e a p p r o v e d i s a s s o c i a t e d w i t h b e i n g a s u c c e s s f u l b u s i n e s s p e r s o n . N e e d l e s s t o say, managing t o be a member of an u p w a r d l y m o b i l e s o c i a l c l a s s h e l p s t o p r o v e t h a t gayness does n o t n e c e s s a r i l y p r e v e n t s u c c e s s . But t h i s a n a l y s i s t e n d s t o s u g g e s t t h a t a gay, l e s b i a n , b i s e x u a l o r t r a n s g e n d e r i n d i v i d u a l ' s w o r t h i n e s s comes from f i n a n c i a l s t a b i l i t y . I n a n s w e r i n g a q u e s t i o n r e g a r d i n g t h e f u t u r e o f queer A s i a n s , Norma r e p l i e d : What k i n d o f f u t u r e w o u l d I ima g i n e ? I w o u l d have t o say t h a t we s h o u l d own our own b u s i n e s s e s o r our own n o n - p r o f i t a g e n c i e s , have o u r c h i l d r e n , have our own homes and n o t be a f r a i d t o wa l k down t h e s t r e e t s . Norma's r e s p o n s e e s t a b l i s h e s a c l e a r r e l a t i o n s h i p between o w n e r s h i p and queer A s i a n v i s i b i l i t y . The much-repeated word "own" s i g n i f i e s h e r sense t h a t queer A s i a n s must be i n p o s s e s s i o n o f t h e i r own l i v e s . T h i s need t o p o s s e s s a p p l i e s t o b o t h p r i v a t e ( f a m i l y and home) and p u b l i c ( s o c i a l s e r v i c e s , b u s i n e s s e s , e t c . ) s p h e r e s . T h i s p r i v a t e / p u b l i c s p l i t r e l a t e s t o t h e l i b e r a l f e m i n i s t c r i t i q u e t h a t p o i n t s o ut how women a r e s y s t e m a t i c a l l y e x c l u d e d from t h e p u b l i c s p h e r e ( J a g g e r 1983, 1 9 8 ) . Indeed, Norma's demand f o r a c c e s s t o p u b l i c a r e n a s p o i n t s d i r e c t l y t o a c o r e c o n c e r n of l i b e r a l f e m i n i s m : "women's l a c k o f Queering the Pacific Northwest 58 e q u a l i t y i n p u b l i c l i f e " (178) . Ron Ho, a s i x t y - f o u r - y e a r o l d gay C h i n e s e j e w e l l e r and t e a c h e r , f e l t v e r y p r o u d o f h i s c a r e e r a c c o m p l i s h m e n t s . He s a i d t h a t b e i n g a b a c h e l o r had a l l o w e d him t o have t h e k i n d o f " s u c c e s s f u l c a r e e r " t h a t b e i n g m a r r i e d w o u l d have p r o h i b i t e d . I n h i s v i e w , b e i n g an a c c o m p l i s h e d a r t i s t and t e a c h e r i s n o t c o m p a t i b l e w i t h b e i n g a " f a m i l y " man. Interviewer: Your parents didn't want you to marry a Chinese g i r l ? Ron: I sa i d to my mother when she asked me, "What, you're not going to get married? [You're going to] be l i k e your uncle, old bachelor Uncle Joe?" I said, "Don't compare me to Uncle Joe because I've l i v e d . " I've t r a v e l l e d a l l over the world, you know, I've had a successful career as a teacher and also a second career as an a r t i s t , and I've done well i n [both]. S h i r l e y Yee, a f o r t y - y e a r - o l d C h i n e s e l e s b i a n , chose an academic c a r e e r . T h i s met w i t h h e r mother's a p p r o v a l and, c o n s e q u e n t l y , h e r l e s b i a n s e x u a l i t y d i d n o t j e o p a r d i z e t h e i r r e l a t i o n s h i p . I n t e r v i e w e r : Do you f e e l l i k e y o u r mom p u t a l o t o f h e r hopes on you, i n terms o f what you were d o i n g and f o r g i n g ? S h i r l e y : Yeah, I t h i n k maybe i n d i r e c t l y she was a l w a y s v e r y s u p p o r t i v e about w h a t e v e r c a r e e r I chose, b u t i t was a l s o f o r t u n a t e t h a t I chose a c a r e e r she ap p r o v e d o f -- an academic c a r e e r -- because I t h i n k she had a l w a y s dreamed o f b e i n g i n th e academy. When S h i r l e y came out as a l e s b i a n , h e r mother was v e r y w o r r i e d t h a t h e r d a u g h t e r w o u l d l o s e h e r j o b as a p r o f e s s o r o f US women's h i s t o r y . The i m p l i c a t i o n h e r e i s t h a t i t was a l l r i g h t f o r S h i r l e y t o be out as l o n g t h i s d i d n ' t c o s t h e r h e r j o b . Amongst A s i a n p e o p l e s , f a m i l y t i e s a r e e x t r e m e l y s t r o n g . The o l d e r g e n e r a t i o n o f t e n j u s t i f i e s i t s e x p e c t a t i o n s o f t h e younger g e n e r a t i o n by p o i n t i n g o u t t h a t i t has p r o v i d e d t h e l a t t e r w i t h a b e t t e r and e a s i e r l i f e . A good d a u g h t e r o r son s h o u l d , i n r e t u r n , choose t h e r i g h t c a r e e r , b r i n g up t h e r i g h t f a m i l y , and t a k e c a r e o f h e r / h i s e l d e r l y p a r e n t s and r e l a t i v e s . Two n a r r a t o r s b r o u g h t up t h e s i g n i f i c a n c e o f b e i n g a good d a u g h t e r o r son. V a l Kanuha, a f o r t y - n i n e - y e a r - o l d H a w a i i a n - C h i n e s e Queering the Pacific Northwest 59 a c t i v i s t / s o c i a l w o r k e r , m e n t i o n e d how h e r b e i n g a "good k i d " s t e e r e d p e o p l e away from a s k i n g h e r whether she had a b o y f r i e n d . I n e v e r g o t i n t o t r o u b l e , I d i d n ' t d r i n k , I d i d n ' t smoke. A l l my f r i e n d s went t h r o u g h [ e x p e r i m e n t i n g w i t h l i q u o r and c i g a r e t t e s ] . What we s h o u l d have been d o i n g a t t h a t age ... I d i d n ' t [ d o ] . A l l my s i b l i n g s went t h r o u g h d r i v i n g t o o f a s t , g e t t i n g s p e e d i n g t i c k e t s , a l l t h o s e t h i n g s -- d r i n k i n g -- b u t I d i d n ' t . So I was alw a y s t h i s good k i d . P r i o r t o comparing h e r s e l f w i t h o t h e r s i b l i n g s , V a l t a l k e d about how she e x c e l l e d i n m u l t i p l e a r e a s of h e r l i f e -- academic a c h i e v e m e n t s , s p o r t s , and s t u d e n t p o l i t i c a l o r g a n i z a t i o n s . She p o i n t e d o ut t h a t , b ecause of h e r many a c c o m p l i s h m e n t s , she was n e v e r a s k e d about whether she had a b o y f r i e n d . R a t h e r t h a n r e v o l v i n g a r o u n d e a r l y m a r r i a g e and motherhood, d i s c u s s i o n s t e n d e d t o r e v o l v e a r o u n d h e r b e i n g a good d a u g h t e r and a s t e l l a r s t u d e n t . I t was a l m o s t as though she were co m p e n s a t i n g f o r b e i n g a l e s b i a n . I n o t h e r words, i n o r d e r t o g a i n f u t u r e a c c e p t a n c e as a . l e s b i a n , V a l f e l t t h a t she had t o p r o v e h e r s e l f t o be e x c e p t i o n a l . Even though V a l a l w a y s had v e r y i n t e n s e f r i e n d s h i p s w i t h o t h e r g i r l s , h e r ac h i e v e m e n t s e n a b l e d h e r t o a v o i d q u e s t i o n i n g of h e r l e s b i a n i d e n t i t y . She m e n t i o n e d t h a t s e x u a l r e l a t i o n s h i p s , whether w i t h women o r men, were n o t a p r i o r i t y f o r h e r . Her a t t r a c t i o n towards women was n o t as i m p o r t a n t t o h e r as was h e r i n v o l v e m e n t i n s p o r t s , academic i n s t i t u t i o n s , and s t u d e n t a c t i v i s m . She d i d n o t c o n f r o n t h e r f a m i l y members about d a t i n g and s e x u a l i t y i s s u e s . V a l m i n i m i z e d t h e p o t e n t i a l d i f f i c u l t i e s o f coming out as a young p e r s o n by a s s e r t i n g h e r independence i n o t h e r a r e a s o f h e r l i f e . T i n o U m a l i , a s e v e n t e e n - y e a r - o l d T h a i - C h i n e s e - E a s t I n d i a n -F i l i p i n o - S p a n i s h queer y o u t h a c t i v i s t , e x p r e s s e d h i s o p i n i o n as t o why he t u r n e d o u t t o be "a good son." She has g i v e n me u l t i m a t e freedom and, l i k e , s i n c e n o t h i n g i s , l i k e , h i d d e n from me, t h e r e i s no c u r i o s i t y and t h e r e i s no, l i k e , r e b e l l i o n a g a i n s t my mom o r a n y t h i n g . So I have t u r n e d Queering the Pacific Northwest 60 out l i k e , p e o p l e l i k e [say] why a r e you s u c h a good son, and i t ' s r e a l l y w e i r d because, l i k e , I've n e v e r smoked a n y t h i n g --no c i g a r e t t e s , no d r u g s -- and, l i k e , I don't go out [and] do drugs o r do weed o r w h a t e v e r ... L i k e I don't know -- I know I l i k e t o cook f o o d . L i k e I s t a y home and i t ' s r e a l l y w e i r d how e v e r y t h i n g t u r n s o u t . I n d e f i n i n g h i s r e l a t i o n s h i p w i t h h i s mother, T i n o m e n t i o n e d numerous t i m e s how c l o s e t h e y were as a son and a s i n g l e mother. T i n o w o u l d be p r e s e n t when h e r mother's gay f r i e n d s came t o t h e i r house and engaged i n c o n v e r s a t i o n s about gay r e l a t i o n s h i p s . H i s mother, C h o l a d a M i z e r , a l s o had open d i s c u s s i o n s on sex and s u b s t a n c e use w i t h T i n o . T i n o f e l t t h a t t h e t r u s t between them was t h e r e a s o n why he was g i v e n " u l t i m a t e freedom." C h o l a d a t r u s t e d T i n o t o make good c h o i c e s and t o be h o n e s t about communicating h i s f e e l i n g s . Throughout t h e i n t e r v i e w , i t was c l e a r t h a t T i n o f e l t v e r y c o n f i d e n t about h i m s e l f as a young p e r s o n . He was e l e c t e d by t h e s t u d e n t body t o be t h e a l l - s c h o o l s e n a t o r , and he was p r e p a r e d t o b r i n g a male d a t e t o t h e h i g h - s c h o o l prom. W i t h t h e s u p p o r t of C h o l a d a , t h e y c o n f r o n t e d t h e p r i n c i p a l about h i s d e c i s i o n t o ban T i n o from b e i n g a member of t h e c h e e r - l e a d i n g squad. The s u p p o r t i v e f a m i l y e n v i r o n m e n t e n a b l e d him t o a s s e r t h i s s e x u a l i d e n t i t y as a gay y o u t h , hence e s t a b l i s h i n g him as a r o l e model f o r queer y o u t h . When Dave Drew, a t h i r t y - y e a r - o l d V i e t n a m e s e - G e r m a n - E n g l i s h gay p e r f o r m a n c e a r t i s t , was a s k e d whether he f e l t t h a t t h e r e were any c u l t u r a l b a r r i e r s t o coming out t o h i m s e l f o r t o h i s b i o l o g i c a l / c h o s e n f a m i l y members. H i s r e s p o n s e was as f o l l o w s : C u l t u r a l b a r r i e r s ... coming out t o m y s e l f -- no, n o t r e a l l y , w i t h a l l my e x t e n d e d f a m i l y on my V i e t n a m e s e s i d e s t i l l i n V i e t n a m . They're n o t exposed t o me. I u s e d t o go t h r o u g h a l o t i n my head [about] why my mom had n e v e r been back t o V i e t n a m s i n c e she's l e f t . I a l w a y s t h o u g h t i t was because of me. Because I am way t o o much of a f r e a k f o r h e r t o go back t h e r e ... t h a t k e p t me s o r t o f c o n f i n e d . Dave's r e s p o n s e t o u c h e d on h i s f e e l i n g s o f g u i l t a r o u n d b e i n g a gay son. H i s b e l i e f t h a t he was t h e r e a s o n h i s mother n e v e r r e t u r n e d t o h e r "homeland" shows t h a t he c o n s i d e r e d h i m s e l f t o be a burden, t h a t he Queering the Pacific Northwest 61 f e l t t h a t h i s q u e e r n e s s shamed h i s mother. C l e a r l y , he b e l i e v e d t h a t h i s q u e e r n e s s was n o t a p p r o p r i a t e e i t h e r t o h i s mother's c u l t u r a l b a c k g r o u n d (Vietnamese) o r t o h i s own ( h a l f - V i e t n a m e s e ) . T h i s l e f t him f e e l i n g " s o r t of c o n f i n e d . " E a r l i e r i n t h e i n t e r v i e w , he b r o u g h t up t h e i s s u e of b e i n g a f i r s t son and t h e r e s p o n s i b i l i t y t h a t he had towards h i s f a t h e r : "I'm h i s f i r s t son [and I'm] t u r n i n g out t o be some w e i r d o f a g g o t , you know, I t h i n k t h a t s o r t a t r i p s him o u t . " He assumed t h a t h i s f a t h e r e x p e c t e d him t o be a h e t e r o s e x u a l man. As t h e son of an i m m i g r a n t mother and a European A m e r i c a n man, he was aware of s o c i e t y ' s judgement on i n t e r - r a c i a l f a m i l i e s , e s p e c i a l l y i n t h e days when i n t e r -r a c i a l m a r r i a g e s were i l l e g a l i n many s t a t e s . D u r i n g t h e i n t e r v i e w , i t was c l e a r t h a t Dave r e c o g n i z e d t h a t h i s p a r e n t s had had a d i f f i c u l t t i m e w i t h t h e i r m u l t i - r a c i a l u n i o n , a l t h o u g h he p o i n t e d out t h a t t h e h a r d s h i p s endured by h i s mother (who had m a r r i e d a non-Roman C a t h o l i c , n o n - V i e t n a m e s e - s p e a k i n g European American) were more d i f f i c u l t t h a n were t h o s e o f h i s f a t h e r . I n i d e n t i f y i n g as m u l t i - r a c i a l and queer, Dave f e l t t h a t , f a r from a l l e v i a t i n g any s o c i e t a l p r e s s u r e f e l t by h i s p a r e n t s , he was a c t u a l l y i n c r e a s i n g i t . He t o o k f u l l r e s p o n s i b i l i t y f o r n o t b e i n g a " d u t i f u l " son and f o r making h i s p a r e n t s w o r r y t h a t , as an out gay man, he was a t a r g e t f o r v i o l e n c e . R e l i g i o n As I have mentioned, I d i d n o t i n c l u d e ; t h e t o p i c of r e l i g i o n i n my l i s t o f q u e s t i o n s because I was n o t aware of i t s s i g n i f i c a n c e t o t h e coming out p r o c e s s f o r queer A s i a n s . T h i s was due t o my own e x p e r i e n c e s , f o r , a l t h o u g h I was b r o u g h t up as a Roman C a t h o l i c and a t t e n d e d an a l l -g i r l s Roman C a t h o l i c s c h o o l f o r e l e v e n y e a r s i n Hong Kong, I have n e v e r f e l t t h e need t o r e c o n c i l e my l e s b i a n s e x u a l i t y w i t h my r e l i g i o u s b e l i e f s . O b t a i n i n g an e d u c a t i o n i n s c h o o l s where E n g l i s h i s t h e p r i m a r y l a n g u a g e of i n s t r u c t i o n has a l w a y s been a p r i o r i t y f o r m i d d l e - c l a s s c h i l d r e n and p a r e n t s i n p o s t c o l o n i a l Hong Kong. Most of t h e s e s c h o o l s Queering the Pacific Northwest 62 a r e r e l i g i o u s - b a s e d o r a r e a f f i l i a t e d w i t h r e l i g i o u s d e n o m i n a t i o n s b a s e d i n f o r e i g n c o u n t r i e s . I saw my a t t e n d a n c e a t an E n g l i s h - s p e a k i n g Roman C a t h o l i c s c h o o l as a s i m p l e p a r t of a t t a i n i n g good e d u c a t i o n . I memorized t h e d o c t r i n e s o f Roman C a t h o l i c i s m w i t h o u t t a k i n g them a t a l l s e r i o u s l y . W i t h i n t h i s m i l i e u , s i s t e r l y a f f e c t i o n was more t o l e r a t e d t h a n were m a l e - f e m a l e r e l a t i o n s h i p s . I r e c a l l numerous t i m e s when my c l a s s m a t e ' s b o y f r i e n d w o u l d w a i t f o r h e r a t t h e s c h o o l ' s g a t e s . The n e x t day, a t e a c h e r w o u l d a p p r o a c h h e r and g i v e h e r a s e r i o u s s c o l d i n g . As a r e s u l t of t h i s , I p e r c e i v e d my l e s b i a n i d e n t i t y t o be more " a c c e p t a b l e " t h a n a h e t e r o s e x u a l i d e n t i t y . I was t o o young and n a i v e t o t h i n k of l e g a l consequences and s o c i e t a l p r e s s u r e s . I no l o n g e r c o n s i d e r m y s e l f a Roman C a t h o l i c . The n a r r a t o r s m e n t i o n e d r e l i g i o n a number of t i m e s and w i t h i n d i f f e r e n t c o n t e x t s . F o r example, Perveen A l i s a i d t h a t r e l i g i o n was one of t h e o b s t a c l e s t o h e r coming out t o h e r f a m i l y : I d i d n ' t come out t o my f a m i l y because my mother b e l o n g s t o a v e r y , v e r y c o n s e r v a t i v e C h r i s t i a n c h u r c h . And I have a younger b r o t h e r and s i s t e r [and] I w o u l d l i k e t o p l a y a p a r t i n t h e i r l i v e s and h e l p them t o be a b l e t o s u r v i v e i n my l o v e l y f a m i l y . [I would] k i n d of l i k e b e i n g a r e s o u r c e t o them. I'm a f r a i d t h a t -- w e l l , I know t h a t i f I were t o come out t o my f a m i l y i n t h a t way, t h a t I w o u l d be c u t o f f from any c o m m u nication w i t h them. And i t ' s v e r y i m p o r t a n t t o me have t h o s e l i n k s ... t o my b r o t h e r and s i s t e r . Numerous t i m e s d u r i n g t h e i n t e r v i e w P e r v e e n d i s p l a y e d a sense of p r o t e c t i v e n e s s w i t h r e g a r d t o h e r s i b l i n g s . As t h e e l d e s t c h i l d , she f e l t r e s p o n s i b l e f o r m a i n t a i n i n g f a m i l y t i e s , and she f e a r e d t h a t coming out as a b i s e x u a l w o u l d j e o p a r d i z e h e r f a m i l y r e l a t i o n s . The sarcasm embedded i n t h e words "my l o v e l y f a m i l y " was h e a r t f e l t , f o r she assumed t h a t h e r p a r e n t s w o u l d disown h e r s h o u l d t h e y l e a r n of h e r s e x u a l i d e n t i t y . Her b r a v e r y i n p a r t i c i p a t i n g i n a p u b l i c p r o j e c t s u c h as Leaving Silence cannot be o v e r - e s t i m a t e d . I t was a r e b e l l i o u s a c t a g a i n s t h e r p a r e n t s -- t h e p r i c e f o r w h i c h c o u l d have been t h e s e v e r i n g of a l l f a m i l y t i e s . Queering the Pacific Northwest 63 R e f l e c t i n g on her father's r e l i g i o u s a f f i l i a t i o n , Perveen p o s i t s that racism was a major reason why he became a Muslim. My father -- i t ' s very i n t e r e s t i n g . He was never extremely conservative or fundamentalist i n h i s b e l i e f s or p r a c t i c e s ... u n t i l the past, maybe the past ten years. I think i t ' s because he's r e a l l y started confronting a l o t of the racism he's experienced i n t h i s country, and the only way he can deal with [i t ] i s by r e a l l y c l i n g i n g t i g h t l y to the culture or the community that he has created around [himself] -- i n order to survive. Perveen believes that her father chose to become involved with a r e l i g i o u s community because i t was a l l he could f i n d : I think one of the few resources he's found for himself has been h i s r e l i g i o n , h i s r e l i g i o u s community ... There aren't many other Bengalis i n Athens, Georgia, but there are a l o t of Muslims. So he's r e a l l y developed that community around himself and kind of protected himself [that way]. Perveen grew up with parents who d i d not communicate with each other due to r e l i g i o u s d i f f e r e n c e s . During the interview, she repeatedly stated the importance of maintaining communication between her s e l f and her s i b l i n g s . Although she explained that her father became a Muslim out of necessity, i t being simply too d i f f i c u l t to be an Indian i n Athens, Georgia, she d i d not say whether her father's decision was understood by every family member. It was d i f f i c u l t for me to understand how Perveen could i d e n t i f y as an "anti-oppression/liberation worker" while s t i l l remaining "oppressed" within her own family. I t was as though she were counting on her professional and volunteer work to balance her i n a b i l i t y to come out to her family. In other words, her work offered her a protected area -- an area that was o f f l i m i t s to her family members. Not unlike her father, Perveen turned to an a c t i v i s t community i n order to r e c o n c i l e her multiple selves. Norma Timbang i d e n t i f i e d r e l i g i o n as one of the c u l t u r a l values common to F i l i p i n o communities. In not going through the process of becoming Roman Catholic, she was " r e b e l l i n g against [her] parents' Queering the Pacific Northwest 64 w i s h e s . " When she was a s k e d about coming o u t , she i m m e d i a t e l y r e f e r r e d t o r e l i g i o n as "a t r a d i t i o n " t h a t was a " c o n s t r a i n t " f o r h e r . I n t e r v i e w e r : Do you f e e l t h a t y o u r p a r e n t s s t r e s s e d c u l t u r a l v a l u e s when you were g r o w i n g up? And, i f so, how d i d t h a t [ a f f e c t ] y o u r coming o u t ? Norma: Yeah, I was, um, t h e o n l y c h i l d i n my f a m i l y who d i d no t go t h r o u g h c a t e c h i s m . Or, you know, t h e p r o c e s s of b e i n g c o n f i r m e d as a C a t h o l i c and a l l o f t h a t s t u f f . The o n l y one who d i d n ' t have b o t h my c h i l d r e n c h r i s t e n e d o r b a p t i z e d . Norma d i d n o t e l a b o r a t e upon how h e r f a m i l y f e l t about h e r s t a n c e towards c a t e c h i s m . She s t a t e d t h a t , i f r e l i g i o u s t e a c h i n g s were u s e f u l , t h e n t h e y w o u l d t e a c h p e o p l e t o r e s p e c t one a n o t h e r . Norma was p a i n f u l l y aware o f t h e l a c k o f r e s p e c t between h e r s i b l i n g s and h e r , p a r e n t s , and, as a r e s u l t , f o und h e r s e l f q u e s t i o n i n g t h e v a l i d i t y o f t r a d i t i o n a l r e l i g i o n s . The f a c t t h a t , when a s k e d how h e r p a r e n t s ' c u l t u r a l v a l u e s a f f e c t e d h e r coming out p r o c e s s , Norma r e p l i e d by m e n t i o n i n g c a t e c h i s m i n d i c a t e s a c l e a r c o r r e l a t i o n between h e r c u l t u r a l b a c k g r o u n d and h e r p a r e n t s ' r e l i g i o n . To h e r , coming out b r i n g s up t h e i s s u e of Roman C a t h o l i c i s m . When t h e i n t e r v i e w e r a s k e d h e r what b e i n g a b i s e x u a l F i l i p i n a meant t o h e r , she r e p l i e d : I t means t h a t I [have] been and I am i n t h e p r o c e s s o f f i g h t i n g a l l t h e c o n s t r a i n t s t h a t have been p l a c e d upon me t o l i v e my l i f e a c e r t a i n way. And p r o b a b l y t h e most e x t e n s i v e of t h o s e c o n s t r a i n t s had t o be my c u l t u r e . Uh ... and f i g h t i n g a g a i n s t ... um ... p e r s p e c t i v e s t h a t have been p r o p a g a t e d by r e l i g i o u s and f a r r i g h t and o t h e r t r a d i t i o n a l p e r s p e c t i v e s . I n a t t e m p t i n g t o a c c o u n t f o r t h e e f f e c t o f r e l i g i o n upon A s i a n q u e e r s , I r e a d about You-Leng L e r o y Lim, an E p i s c o p a l p r i e s t who grew up i n S i n g a p o r e , b o r n t o f u n d a m e n t a l i s t C h r i s t i a n C h i n e s e p a r e n t s (Eng and Horn 1998) . When L i m was i n Grade 1, he was t a u g h t t o b e l i e v e t h a t a mother's l o v e i s t h e g r e a t e s t form o f g i v i n g . A f t e r a t t e n d i n g c o l l e g e i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s f o r more t h a n t e n y e a r s , L i m r e t u r n e d t o S i n g a p o r e t o come o u t t o h i s p a r e n t s . He s e t a s i d e one y e a r f r o m g r a d u a t e s c h o o l t o go t h r o u g h t h i s p r o c e s s . I n one c o n v e r s a t i o n he had w i t h h i s p a r e n t s , Queering the Pacific Northwest 65 t h e y t a l k e d about how gayness meant t h a t t h e d e v i l had i n f i l t r a t e d h i s mind. He remembers h i s mother s a y i n g , " I n t h e name o f J e s u s , may you n e v e r have a male l o v e r . " A l t h o u g h L i m d i d n o t e l a b o r a t e upon t h e c o n v e r s a t i o n o r upon whether h i s f a t h e r p a r t i c i p a t e d i n i t , he conveyed t o us t h e s e a r i n g p a i n o f b e i n g r e l i g i o u s , q ueer, and e m o t i o n a l l y t i e d t o y o u r f a m i l y . I n r e c a l l i n g h i s days as a t e e n a g e r , L i m s a i d , L a t e r , as my a t t e n t i o n t o boys r e m a i n e d unabated, I s t a r t e d t o h a t e m y s e l f . C l e a r l y , i f God had t o u c h e d me w i t h h i s own p r e s e n c e y e t r e f u s e d t o h e a r my p r a y e r f o r s e x u a l change, I had t o be d e s p i c a b l e . (Eng and Horn 1998, 329) Many t i m e s , L i m c o n t e m p l a t e d s u i c i d e . However, he f i n a l l y f o u n d peace by a t t e n d i n g a gay men's s p i r i t u a l i t y r e t r e a t , where he met o t h e r s who had t h e same q u e s t i o n s r e g a r d i n g t h e r e l a t i o n s h i p between s p i r i t u a l i t y and a gay male i d e n t i t y . How does one i n t e g r a t e s p i r i t u a l i t y w i t h q ueer s e x u a l i t y ? How does god's l o v e m a n i f e s t i t s e l f f o r q u e e r s among b i b l i c a l d o c t r i n e s t h a t a r e i n t e r p r e t e d as a n t i - g a y by many of god's f o l l o w e r s ? A t t h e r e t r e a t , L i m came t o r e a l i z e t h a t r e t u r n i n g home does n o t mean r e t u r n i n g t o one's f a m i l y , c h u r c h , o r l o v e r ; r a t h e r , i t means t h a t God i s "the u n c o n t a i n a b l e t r u e home, and t h e s e l f i s t h e h e a r t h and t h e b u r n i n g f i r e " (332) . Lim's e x p e r i e n c e p o i n t s one p o s s i b l e way o f r e c o n c i l i n g s p i r i t u a l i t y w i t h queer s e x u a l i t y . A l t h o u g h he r e c o g n i z e s t h a t r e l i g i o u s i n s t i t u t i o n s c o n t r i b u t e t o t h e s y s t e m i c o p p r e s s i o n o f q u e e r s , L i m r e l i e s upon h i s own i n t e r p r e t a t i o n o f d o c t r i n e s and h i s own p e r s o n a l b e l i e f i n God. Thus L i m p r o v i d e s hope t o many q u e e r s who a r e s t r u g g l i n g w i t h t h e i r r e l i g i o u s u p b r i n g i n g and b e l i e f s . I n s e a r c h i n g f o r w r i t i n g s t h a t a d d r e s s f e m i n i s m and r e l i g i o n , I came a c r o s s Cheng Imm Tan. A s e n i o r a s s o c i a t e m i n i s t e r a t t h e U n i t a r i a n U n i v e r s a l i s t Urban M i n i s t r y and an o r g a n i z e r and c o - f o u n d e r o f t h e A s i a n Women's Task F o r c e A g a i n s t D omestic V i o l e n c e i n B o s t o n , Tan d i s c u s s e s t h e c o n f l i c t s between h e r p o s i t i o n as a f e m i n i s t and h e r p o s i t i o n as a Queering the Pacific Northwest 66 t h e o l o g i a n . She i s aware of s e x i s m i n r e l i g i o u s i n s t i t u t i o n s , t h e male i d e n t i t y o f God, and male-dominated r e l i g i o u s l a n g u a g e . F u r t h e r m o r e , Tan p r o b l e m a t i z e s C h r i s t i a n i t y ' s emphasis on d u a l i s m : good v e r s u s e v i l , s o u l v e r s u s body, and s p i r i t v e r s u s m a t t e r (Shah 1997, 200-15). Tan became i n t e r e s t e d i n C h r i s t i a n i t y a f t e r h a v i n g been b r o u g h t up w i t h i n a mish-mash of r e l i g i o u s t r a d i t i o n s , r a n g i n g from Buddhism t o C h r i s t i a n i t y . A f t e r she s e v e r e d h e r t i e s w i t h t h e C h r i s t i a n c h u r c h , she began t o d i f f e r e n t i a t e between o r g a n i z e d r e l i g i o n and s p i r i t u a l i t y . By r e c l a i m i n g l o v e f o r h e r s e l f and f o r h e r c u l t u r a l r o o t s , Tan a c h i e v e d a renewed sense of h e r whole s e l f . R a t h e r t h a n f o l l o w i n g d o c t r i n e s and masses, Tan was a t t r a c t e d t o i s s u e s p e r t a i n i n g t o s o c i a l j u s t i c e . As a community a c t i v i s t , she f e l t t h a t i t was t o o e m o t i o n a l l y d r a i n i n g f o r h e r t o c o n t i n u e h e r a c t i v i s t work w i t h o u t t a k i n g c a r e o f h e r s p i r i t u a l needs. She began t o e x p l o r e t h e p o s s i b i l i t y o f l i n k i n g a n t i - o p p r e s s i o n frameworks, p a r t i c u l a r l y f e m i n i s m , w i t h s p i r i t u a l i t y . Tan found t h a t i t was o n l y t h r o u g h t h e c u l t i v a t i o n o f a s p i r i t u a l l i f e t h a t she c o u l d l e a r n t o l o v e c o m p l e t e l y and t o l i v e h e r l i f e w e l l . And i t was s p i r i t u a l i n s p i r a t i o n t h a t e n a b l e d h e r t o be a c t i v e i n t h e f e m i n i s t and d o m e s t i c v i o l e n c e movements. B e i n g i n - b e t w e e n Many of t h e n a r r a t o r s b r o u g h t up t h e i s s u e of " f i t t i n g i n " when a t t e m p t i n g t o d e s c r i b e t h e i r s i t u a t i o n as m i x e d - r a c e q u e e r s . B e i n g of mixed r a c e has d i f f e r e n t meanings w i t h i n d i f f e r e n t c u l t u r a l and p o l i t i c a l c o n t e x t s . Census d a t a r e l e a s e d by t h e US Census Bureau showed t h e p e r c e n t a g e of r e s i d e n t s who i d e n t i f i e d w i t h two o r more r a c e s as 2.4 p e r c e n t of t h e n a t i o n a l p o p u l a t i o n . The p e r c e n t a g e s d i f f e r from one s t a t e t o a n o t h e r i n c o m p a r i s o n w i t h t h e s t a t e p o p u l a t i o n s i z e . F o r example, t h e s t a t e of Washington has a 3.6 p e r c e n t a g e compared t o a 4.7 p e r c e n t a g e i n t h e s t a t e o f C a l i f o r n i a . A l t h o u g h I c a n n o t g e n e r a l i z e on t h e i n t e r - r e l a t i o n s between m i x e d - r a c e i d e n t i t i e s and q u e e r n e s s , I f e e l Queering the Pacific Northwest 67 t h a t t h e c r o s s i n g o f r a c i a l b o u n d a r i e s m ight c o n t r i b u t e t o a more open a t t i t u d e towards t h e c r o s s i n g o f gender l i n e s . As t h e d a u g h t e r o f an I r i s h and F r e n c h mother and an E a s t I n d i a n f a t h e r , S h e i l a B a t a c h a r y a (Oikawa, F a l c o n e r , and D e c t e r 1994, 182) w r i t e s : " I n w h i t e c u l t u r e my i d e n t i t y as a woman of c o l o u r i s e r a s e d . I n a South A s i a n c o n t e x t my e x i s t e n c e i s t r a c e d t o c o l o n i z a t i o n . R a c i s m p r e c l u d e s b o t h o f t h e s e r e a l i t i e s . " When b e i n g h a l f w h i t e i s l i n k e d t o p r i v i l e g e , t h e d i c h o t o m y of w h i t e v e r s u s c o l o u r becomes p r o b l e m a t i c . B a t a c h a r y a ' s a n a l y s i s o f p r i v i l e g e and o p p r e s s i o n i s c o m p l i c a t e d by t h e f a c t t h a t h e r f a t h e r e x p e r i e n c e d r a c i s m b u t had t h e p r i v i l e g e s a s s o c i a t e d w i t h m a s c u l i n i t y , w h i l e h e r w o r k i n g - c l a s s mother e x p e r i e n c e d c l a s s i s m b u t had t h e p r i v i l e g e a s s o c i a t e d w i t h w h i t e n e s s . B a t a c h a r y a ' s community a c t i v i s m was a l s o a f f e c t e d by h e r m i x e d - r a c e i d e n t i t y , as she q u e s t i o n e d whether, h a v i n g grown up i n a w h i t e suburban n e i g h b o u r h o o d w i t h w h i t e n e i g h b o u r s and p e e r s , she w o u l d be c o n s i d e r e d a woman of c o l o u r . I n commenting on t h e l a c k o f a mixed h e r i t a g e s u p p o r t group i n S e a t t l e , Washington, T a n i t h Songsook K i m s i n g , a t h i r t y - o n e - y e a r - o l d Korean-German-Swedish l e s b i a n , s a i d : Because I t h i n k , I mean t h e A s i a n community i s v e r y g r e a t and a c c e p t i n g o f mixed p e o p l e s , b u t s t i l l I was v e r y a p p r e h e n s i v e about i t [ i . e . , t h e l e s b i a n o f c o l o u r - s u p p o r t group] because I have been t u r n e d away b e f o r e . W e l l . I mean, y o u ' r e n o t a f u l l woman of c o l o u r , t h e r e f o r e you c a n ' t s i t i n , and y o u ' r e j u s t , l i k e , s t a n d i n g t h e r e l i k e a dumb-ass. She o f f e r e d t h e s e comments on b e i n g queer and A s i a n : Oh, about b e i n g queer and A s i a n . Anyway, w e l l , I guess what I was s a y i n g j u s t a few seconds ago i s n e v e r 100 p e r c e n t l i k e b e i n g queer and A s i a n . I don't know what t h a t ' s r e a l l y l i k e b e cause I alw a y s have t h a t w h i t e element -- a l w a y s . You know, I a l w a y s have t o t h i n k about t h a t . And you know I [have] a l w a y s t r i e d b e i n g a l e s b i a n i n t h e w h i t e way -- I have. I don't know what i t ' s l i k e b e i n g an A s i a n l e s b i a n , l i k e 100 p e r c e n t , because my r o l e models were a l w a y s w h i t e . T a n i t h ' s m u l t i - r a c i a l i d e n t i t y made i t c l e a r t o us t h a t r a c i a l b o u n d a r i e s a r e n o t a s i m p l e m a t t e r o f " b l a c k and w h i t e . " T a n i t h ' s Queering the Pacific Northwest 68 e t h n i c composition -- Korean, German, and Swedish -- challenges any easy d e f i n i t i o n of who counts as being Asian American, or, indeed, as being European. T a n i t h " t r i e d being a l e s b i a n i n the white way" because that was what allowed her to f i t i n t o the l e s b i a n community i n New Mexico, Ariz o n a . When she attempted to j o i n a queer Asian group, she was informed that she was not Asian enough. This shows how sm a l l , i n s u l a r communities o f t e n set t h e i r own oppressive r u l e s and boundaries. By not co n f r o n t i n g e s s e n t i a l i s t assumptions of who can be Asian American, queer Asian American groups run the r i s k of e s t a b l i s h i n g t h e i r own sets of r a c i a l h i e r a r c h i e s . Thus community groups that c l a i m to be a n t i -oppressive o f t e n perpetuate d i s c r i m i n a t i o n i n yet another guise. Therefore, i t i s c r u c i a l to confront ourselves and our community groups by working towards i n c l u s i v i t y and ensuring that s i l e n c e d v o i c e s be heard. Perveen a l s o t a l k e d about f e e l i n g in-between: P e r s o n a l l y I don't f e e l l i k e I've ever had the lux u r y of d e f i n i n g my l i f e i n narrow ways because I've always l i v e d i n -between, in-between everything. So i t ' s very important to me to never create those boundaries. And e s p e c i a l l y because I do so much a n t i - o p p r e s s i o n work, I f e e l l i k e the more boundaries I create around myself and my i d e n t i t y , the more d i f f i c u l t i t ' s going to be f o r me to empathize w i t h other people or to see the s u b t l e t i e s i n the ways oppression i n t e r s e c t , [how they] r e i n f o r c e each other. Being on the margins of communities, Tanith. comments: Yeah, couldn't f i t i n t o the white community ... being a l e s b i a n [I couldn't f i t i n t o ] the s t r a i g h t community. The Korean community t o t a l l y r e j e c t e d me, p a r t l y because I was ha l f - w h i t e , and p a r t l y because they thought I was s i c k because I was a l e s b i a n . The f e e l i n g of being in-between, or on the margins, l e d Karen Maeda Allman to i n t e r r o g a t e Asian American-ness. She described how ta k i n g the middle name of "Maeda" made her f e e l more Asian. Yet her experience of working i n people of colour groups was f r u s t r a t i n g because Queering the Pacific Northwest 69 she c o n s i s t e n t l y had t o p r o v e h e r r i g h t t o be t h e r e . I n t e r v i e w e r : Can you g i v e some examples o f [the] p r e j u d i c e you have t o f a c e w i t h i n d i f f e r e n t o r g a n i z a t i o n s ? K a r e n : I ' l l be w o r k i n g w i t h them, o r t h e y w o u l d l o o k a t me and say, " W e l l you know, you c o u l d p a s s f o r w h i t e a n y t i m e , " w h i c h I t h i n k i s a l i t t l e s t r a n g e [ l a u g h s ] ... Or, you know, w o r k i n g i n c o a l i t i o n w i t h p e o p l e o f c o l o u r ... w o r k i n g a l o n g w i t h them, and t h e n a l l o f a sudden f i g u r i n g o ut t h a t t h e y t h i n k I'm N a t i v e A m e r i c a n o r something? And t h e n t h e y f i n d o ut I'm A s i a n , and t h e n , you know, we've [got] t o d e a l w i t h t h e whole ... Don't you A s i a n s r e a l l y want t o be w h i t e p e o p l e ? ... But t h a t ' s e a s i e r , I guess, i f i t ' s a group t h a t ' s ... a more mixed group of p e o p l e . I t ' s e a s i e r f o r me t h a n [when] we're a l l t r y i n g t o be A s i a n A m e r i c a n t o g e t h e r , 'cause I al w a y s f e e l l i k e I don't measure up t o b e [ i n g ] A s i a n A m e r i c a n enough. Karen's r e s p o n s e s i g n i f i e s a common a s s u m p t i o n t h a t A s i a n A m e r i c a n s a r e n o t r e a l l y o f mixed h e r i t a g e -- t h e y a r e A s i a n s , and "Don't you A s i a n s r e a l l y want t o be w h i t e p e o p l e ? " B e i n g o f mi x e d r a c e -- i n Karen's c a s e , b e i n g Japanese European -- i s commonly a s s o c i a t e d w i t h b e i n g a b l e t o pass as a w h i t e p e r s o n . T h i s f u r t h e r c o m p l i c a t e s K a ren's s i t u a t i o n , a s , w i t h i n a n t i - o p p r e s s i o n movements, h e r r a c i a l i d e n t i t y was v i e w e d as t h a t o f t h e o p p r e s s o r . Her v i s i b l e r i g h t t o be i n p e o p l e o f c o l o u r groups was c o n s t a n t l y c h a l l e n g e d by o t h e r s i n t h o s e g r o u p s . I n v o l v e d i n many ad v o c a c y groups, J u l i a n a Pegues, a w r i t e r and a c t i v i s t , o b s e r v e d t h a t o r g a n i z a t i o n s b a s e d on i d e n t i t y o f t e n have t o d e a l w i t h c o n f l i c t s s u r r o u n d i n g r a c i a l and c l a s s i s s u e s (Shah 1997). F o r example, an A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r l e s b i a n and b i s e x u a l (APILB) group i n M i n n e a p o l i s f o l d e d a f t e r t r y i n g t o t a c k l e t h e i s s u e o f c l a s s w i t h i n i t s membership. Members o f t h e group were d i s c u s s i n g t h e f i n a n c i a l a i d p o l i c y f o r a r e g i o n a l A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r l e s b i a n and b i s e x u a l women's r e t r e a t . P r i n c i p l e s p e r t a i n i n g t o f i n a n c i a l a i d f o r r e g i s t r a n t s were q u e s t i o n e d w h i l e a committee was s e t up t o d e c i d e on t h e f e e s c a l e . One member f e l t t h a t t h e r e was enough t i m e f o r women who were coming t o t h e c o n f e r e n c e t o e a r n money f o r r e g i s t r a t i o n f e e s . She t h o u g h t t h a t t h e o t h e r c o n f e r e n c e o r g a n i z e r s were b e i n g i d e a l i s t i c Queering the Pacific Northwest 70 i n w a n t i n g t o c o v e r e v e r y o n e ' s f i n a n c i a l needs. At t h a t p o i n t , a n o t h e r member c a l l e d h e r - a c l a s s i s t . T h i s l e d t o p e r s o n a l a t t a c k s b e i n g s h o u t e d back and f o r t h , w i t h t h e group f a i l i n g t o r e s o l v e t h e s i t u a t i o n . C l a s s dynamics and u n r e s t e v e n t u a l l y l e d t o t h e d i s m a n t l i n g of t h i s APILB group. Pegues's d e s c r i p t i o n of t h i s group d e m o n s t r a t e s t h e i n t e r -r e l a t i o n s h i p s among c l a s s , r a c e , and s e x u a l i t y . The group came t o g e t h e r u n d e r t h e common banner o f b e i n g q u e e r A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r , b u t c l a s s d i f f e r e n c e s were n o t d i r e c t l y a d d r e s s e d , and l e d t o i t s demise (Shah 1997, 3-16). As i s c l e a r from T a n i t h ' s comments r e g a r d i n g b e i n g m i x e d - r a c e i n a l e s b i a n of c o l o u r group, and from Perveen's comments r e g a r d i n g t h e queer A s i a n community's r e l u c t a n c e t o i n c l u d e r e f u g e e s , community b o u n d a r i e s a r e a t t i m e s r i g i d . T h i s , of c o u r s e , i s i n o r d e r t o p r o t e c t t h e i n t e r e s t s of t h e l a r g e r membership. I n o r d e r t o g e t a r o u n d t h i s p r o b l e m , Pugues (1997) s u g g e s t s t h a t i d e n t i t y - b a s e d o r g a n i z a t i o n s f o c u s on s p e c i f i c i s s u e s and expand t h e i r b o u n d a r i e s by r e a c h i n g out t o p o l i t i c a l a l l i e s . On 25 A p r i l 1995, f o u r p o l i t i c a l community-based o r g a n i z a t i o n s p a r t i c i p a t e d i n a m u l t i - i s s u e a c t i o n a g a i n s t c u t s implemented by New Y o r k C i t y Mayor R u d o l p h G i u l i a n i and New Y o r k C i t y G o v e r n o r George P a t a k i . The Committee A g a i n s t A n t i - A s i a n V i o l e n c e (CAAAV) p r o t e s t e d a g a i n s t p o l i c e b r u t a l i t y and r a c i a l v i o l e n c e . ACT UP d e m o n s t r a t e d a g a i n s t f u n d i n g c u t s i n t h e a r e a s of p u b l i c h e a l t h c a r e and A I D S - r e l a t e d i s s u e s . I n t h e meantime, C o a l i t i o n A g a i n s t t h e C u t s d e m o n s t r a t e d a g a i n s t t h e d r a m a t i c d e c r e a s e of p u b i c e d u c a t i o n b u d g e t s , and H o u s i n g Works p r o t e s t e d a g a i n s t t h e l a c k o f s o c i a l h o u s i n g . On t h e day of a c t i o n , t h e s e f o u r o r g a n i z a t i o n s b l o c k e d t h e e x i t s of t h r e e c i t y t u n n e l s and made a p o w e r f u l p u b l i c s t a t e m e n t r e g a r d i n g t h e i r j o i n t m i s s i o n towards s o c i a l j u s t i c e (Eng and Horn 1998, 67-69). I n o t h e r words, a commitment t o s o c i a l change, r a t h e r t h a n e t h n i c and/or s e x u a l i d e n t i t y , s h o u l d be t h e f o c a l p o i n t of group membership (Shah 1997, 1 2 ) . W i t h r e g a r d t o f i t t i n g i n t o a p a r t i c u l a r community, Bookda Queering the Pacific Northwest 71 G h e i s a r , t h e t h i r t y - n i n e - y e a r - o l d d i r e c t o r o f a c r o s s c u l t u r a l h e a l t h c a r e program, d i s c u s s e d t h e d i f f i c u l t y o f r e t u r n i n g t o I r a n and l i v i n g as a l e s b i a n . Her f a m i l y b e l i e v e d t h a t she became a l e s b i a n b ecause she went t o t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s . They b e l i e v e d t h a t h e r s e x u a l i d e n t i t y was a p r o d u c t o f Western c u l t u r a l i n f l u e n c e , t h a t she "became" a l e s b i a n as a r e s u l t o f c u l t u r a l a s s i m i l a t i o n . I n t e r v i e w e r : How d i d you r e s p o n d t o [your f a m i l y ] w r i t i n g o f f [your l e s b i a n i s m as a m a t t e r o f ] a s s i m i l a t i o n ? Bookda: W e l l , i t was v e r y , v e r y p a i n f u l b e c a u s e t h e whole i s s u e o f a s s i m i l a t i o n was p a i n f u l enough a l r e a d y . I was so c o n f u s e d by t h e n ... t h i s was now 1987/88, when t h e y a l l moved t o T o r o n t o and I came out t o t h e r e s t o f my f a m i l y . By t h e n , I was so c o n f u s e d about what was h a p p e n i n g t o me. I don't seem t o be g o i n g back and l i v i n g t h e r e . There a r e ways t h a t I am v e r y b i c u l t u r a l , and t h e r e a r e ways t h a t I am becoming more a s s i m i l a t e d t h a n I want t o r e c o g n i z e . And t h e r e a r e t h i n g s t h a t I p r e f e r about l i v i n g h e r e , t h a t I l i k e b e t t e r h e r e . And what does t h a t mean and who am I ? Where am I e v e r g o i n g t o f i t ? T h e re's n o t any one community t h a t I f i t i n t o . So I'm ... g o i n g t o be l o n e l y f o r t h e r e s t o f my l i f e . F i t t i n g i n becomes an i s s u e once a community d e f i n e s i t s b o u n d a r i e s and e s t a b l i s h e s i t s v a l u e s and norms. The e x c l u s i o n o f p r o g r e s s i v e groups a t t h e f i f t e e n t h a n n u a l I n d i a Day Parade i n New Y o r k C i t y i n August 1995 i s a p r i m e example o f t h e c o n f l i c t between c u l t u r a l v a l u e s and p o l i t i c a l b e l i e f s . As t h e p a r a d e o r g a n i z e r s , t h e F e d e r a t i o n • o f I n d i a n A s s o c i a t i o n s (FIA) banned t h e p a r t i c i p a t i o n o f t h e f o l l o w i n g o r g a n i z a t i o n s : S a k h i f o r South A s i a n Women (an o r g a n i z a t i o n t h a t works w i t h b a t t e r e d S o u t h A s i a n women and i s d e d i c a t e d t o s o c i a l c hange), t h e South A s i a n L e s b i a n and Gay A s s o c i a t i o n (SALGA), and t h e South A s i a n A I D S . A c t i o n (SAAA) group. These groups were e x c l u d e d on t h e grounds t h a t t h e y d i d n o t r e p r e s e n t F I A ' s v a l u e s . I n an i n t e r v i e w w i t h a r e p o r t e r , t h e p r e s i d e n t o f FIA s a i d , " T h i s i s t h e I n d i a Day Parade. I t has t o do w i t h I n d i a n c u l t u r e , t r a d i t i o n a l I n d i a n v a l u e s . " He went on t o e x p l a i n t h a t i t was n o t h o m o s e x u a l i t y t h a t he o b j e c t e d t o b u t , r a t h e r , t h e p l a c a r d s t h a t " a d v e r t i s e d " s e x u a l i t y . I t was n o t s u r p r i s i n g t h a t SALGA was F I A ' s p r i m e t a r g e t Queering the Pacific Northwest 72 group. F I A ' s p r e s i d e n t b e l i e v e d t h a t t h e i r v a l u e s were s i m p l y n o t " I n d i a n v a l u e s . " I n any c a s e , F I A b e l i e v e d t h a t t h e s e t h r e e p r o g r e s s i v e g roups j e o p a r d i z e d t h e c u l t u r a l i d e n t i t y o f I n d i a , and t h e i r a c t i v i s m was b e l i e v e d t o amount t o t h e p r o p a g a t i o n o f i n d i v i d u a l b e l i e f s and, hence, t o have no b a s i s i n a c o l l e c t i v e c o n s c i o u s n e s s . Commenting on t h e e x c l u s i o n o f t h e s e groups, F IA v i c e - p r e s i d e n t Ram Suchdev s a i d : "The c u l t u r a l event o f t h e par a d e i s n o t t h e p l a c e f o r r e d e f i n i n g n o t i o n s o f f a m i l y and t h e i n d i v i d u a l ; t h i s p o l i t i c a l work i s c o n s i d e r e d d i s r e s p e c t f u l and a l i e n t o t h e c u l t u r e " (Shah 1997, 4 8 ) . Suchdev's n o t i o n o f I n d i a n c u l t u r e c o m p l e t e l y " d i s a p p e a r s " l e s b i a n s , gays, b i s e x u a l s , and t r a n s g e n d e r e d South A s i a n s . T h i s p e r s o n i s supposed t o " r e p r e s e n t " t h e South A s i a n community i n New York, y e t , i n an a l l e g e d a t t e m p t t o " p r o t e c t " South A s i a n c u l t u r e , he d e n i e s t h e e x i s t e n c e o f a l l queer South A s i a n s and t h e i r e f f o r t s a t community o r g a n i z i n g . The f a c t t h a t t h e queer S o u t h A s i a n o r g a n i z a t i o n T r i k o n e (which was e s t a b l i s h e d i n 1986 by S a v i r Das and A r v i n d Kumar) p u b l i s h e s a n e w s l e t t e r and a c t i v e l y p a r t i c i p a t e s i n b o t h queer and non-queer c u l t u r a l f e s t i v a l s means n o t h i n g t o Suchdev. The f o u r common themes i n t h e n a r r a t i v e s : (1) g e n e r a t i o n a l d i f f e r e n c e s w i t h r e g a r d t o t h e use of t h e word "queer," (2) t h e r e l a t i o n s h i p between achievement and f a m i l y a c c e p t a n c e , (3) b e i n g i n -between, and (4) r e l i g i o n , i l l u s t r a t e k e y a r e a s t h a t were of c o n c e r n t o t h e p a r t i c i p a n t s . A l t h o u g h t h e s e f o u r themes were n o t d e f i n i t i v e o f queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n l i v e s , t h e y s t o o d out as what were i n f l u e n c i n g f a c t o r s f o r queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s b u t c o u l d have been commonplace f o r non-queers. I a l l u d e t o t h i s b ecause Leaving Silence as an e d u c a t i o n a l t o o l r a i s e d p e r t i n e n t i s s u e s i n t o what c o n s t i t u t e d queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n i d e n t i t i e s . The a n a l y s i s o f t h e s e f o u r i s s u e s were s p e c i f i c t o t h e p a r t i c i p a n t s y e t s h a r e d by many o t h e r queer f o l k s . The p r i m a r y g o a l o f t h e e x h i b i t i s t o r a i s e p u b l i c awareness o f i s s u e s f a c i n g queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s . I w i l l e x p l o r e how t h e e x h i b i t expands t h e b o u n d a r i e s o f Queering the Pacific Northwest pedagogy and a s s e r t s i t s e l f i n t o t h e r e a l m o f p u b l i c pedagogy i n t h e f o l l o w i n g c h a p t e r , "The Pedagogy o f a T r a v e l l i n g E x h i b i t . " Queering the Pacific Northwest 74 CHAPTER 5: THE PEDAGOGY OF A TRAVELLING EXHIBIT I f t h e p u r p o s e o f l e a r n i n g / t e a c h i n g d e t e r m i n e s t h e t y p e o f knowledge pr o d u c e d , i m p l i c i t i n t h i s knowledge i s a l w a y s a n o t i o n o f p o l i t i c a l agency. The agency, whether i t i s a c t i v e o r p a s s i v e , o f a p r o d u c e r o r of a consumer, v a r i e s a c c o r d i n g t o t h e g o a l -- w h i c h may e i t h e r be s o c i a l change o r t h e c o n t i n u a t i o n o f t h e s t a t u s quo. 2 1 -- Himani B a n n e r j i Pedagogy, w i t h i n t h e c o n t e x t o f f o r m a l e d u c a t i o n , i s o f t e n r e f e r r e d t o as t h e method o f i n s t r u c t i o n t h a t o c c u r s w i t h i n s c h o o l and u n i v e r s i t y c l a s s r o o m s . I t p o i n t s t o b o t h " i n t e n t i o n a l t e a c h i n g and mea s u r a b l e l e a r n i n g , " w h i c h o c c u r i n " f o r m a l l y named e d u c a t i o n a l i n s t i t u t i o n s " (Luke 1996, 4-5). A s t u d e n t ' s s u c c e s s i s commonly d e t e r m i n e d by u s i n g e v a l u a t i v e t o o l s s u c h as e x a m i n a t i o n s and as s i g n m e n t s . E d u c a t o r s a r e e x p e c t e d t o f u l f i l t h e r o l e o f e x p e r t s and t o p r o v i d e knowledge t o s t u d e n t s w i t h i n s p e c i f i c i n s t i t u t i o n a l s e t t i n g s . I f th e b o u n d a r i e s o f pedagogy c o u l d be widened t o i n c l u d e l e a r n i n g p r o c e s s e s t h a t o c c u r i n n o n - t r a d i t i o n a l p l a c e s , t h e n e d u c a t o r s w o u l d be a b l e t o broaden t h e scope o f t h e i r t e a c h i n g and t o e s t a b l i s h a c l o s e r r e l a t i o n s h i p w i t h t h e i r s t u d e n t s . I f our l e n s becomes narrow, t h e n so, t o o , does o u r f o c u s . Carmen Luke (1996, 7 ) , a f e m i n i s t e d u c a t o r and e d i t o r o f Feminisms and Pedagogies of Everyday L i f e , t e l l s why she pu r s u e s a b r o a d p e d a g o g i c a l s t a n c e : " L e a r n i n g and t e a c h i n g , i n my e s t i m a t i o n , a r e t h e v e r y i n t e r s u b j e c t i v e c o r e r e l a t i o n s o f e v e r y d a y l i f e . They e x i s t beyond t h e c l a s s r o o m , a r e a l w a y s gendered and i n t e r c u l t u r a l . " I n t h i s c h a p t e r I argue t h a t Leaving Silence: Queer A s i a n / P a c i f i c Islander Oral History Exhibit f a c i l i t a t e d d i s c u s s i o n s p e r t a i n i n g t o t h e c o m p l e x i t i e s o f r a c e , c l a s s , and s e x u a l i t y t h r o u g h i t s l e g i t i m i z a t i o n of 2 1 Himani Bannerji, Thinking Through: Essays on Feminism, Marxism, and Anti-Racism (Toronto: Women's Press, 1995), 64-65. Queering the Pacific Northwest 75 queer Asian scholarship. 2 2 The fact that i t i s a t r a v e l l i n g e x h i b it gives Leaving Silence a dia s p o r i c q u a l i t y that makes i t amenable to Luke's form of pedagogy. Drawing upon the f i e l d s of feminist pedagogy and c u l t u r a l studies ( p a r t i c u l a r l y i n education), I, l i k e Luke, urge educators to look beyond classroom c u r r i c u l a to f i n d a l t e r n a t i v e ways of i n t e r p r e t i n g the world around us. Educators should bring i n organizers from various s o c i a l movements and address marginalized issues -- those issues that have r o u t i n e l y been deemed i n s i g n i f i c a n t within, or inappropriate to, canonical domains. Foremost among these are issues of race, sexuality, and c l a s s . The search for anti-oppression i d e n t i f i e r s i s an open-ended one, as g l o b a l i z a t i o n forces us to reassess our tendency to look at the world i n terms of simple oppositional stances. No longer can we ignore how s o c i a l , c u l t u r a l , and p o l i t i c a l factors i n t e r s e c t i n our l i v e s and the l i v e s of others. We must create forums within classroom spaces that w i l l allow us to share our knowledge and to teach lessons i n community organizing. In t h i s regard, Leaving Silence prompts us to consider grassroots community projects as educational tools and as a means of r a i s i n g p ublic awareness of s o c i a l and p o l i t i c a l concerns. In analyzing Leaving Silence I am, i n essence, analyzing a community project. The c o l l e c t i v e e f f o r t behind putting t h i s e x h i b it together was i n i t i a t e d by i n d i v i d u a l a c t i v i s t s . They began the coordination process by approaching community agencies for t h e i r sponsorship and endorsement. Grant a p p l i c a t i o n s were written and funds were r a i s e d through i n d i v i d u a l donors and organizations. As word spread about the exhibit, experienced community a c t i v i s t s came forward to share t h e i r knowledge, and newcomers came forward to learn organizing s k i l l s . Moreover, various agencies, s o c i a l groups, and i n d i v i d u a l s generated new ideas and established partnerships. Asian Counseling and Referral 2 2 Although the title of the exhibit claimed to be inclusive of Pacific Islanders, the exhibit itself did not Queering the Pacific Northwest 76 S e r v i c e s , a p r i m a r y m e n t a l h e a l t h s e r v i c e s p r o v i d e r c o l l a b o r a t e d w i t h S e a t t l e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t P r e s e r v a t i o n and Development A s s o c i a t i o n , a r e g i o n a l c u l t u r a l p r e s e r v a t i o n agency, t o e n d o r s e and s u p p o r t t h e e x h i b i t by d o n a t i n g s t a f f r e s o u r c e s and " i n - k i n d " s e r v i c e s s u c h as space f o r Working A d v i s o r y Committee m e e t i n g s and a c c e s s t o p h o t o c o p i e r s . A n o t h e r key example of c o o p e r a t i o n i n v o l v e d t h e s h a r i n g o f s k i l l s between Bob Shimabukuro (a f o u n d e r of A s i a n P a c i f i c AIDS S e r v i c e s and a community l e a d e r of t h e J a panese A m e r i c a n community i n S e a t t l e ) and younger a c t i v i s t s on m a r k e t i n g s t r a t e g i e s and n e t w o r k i n g i n t h e m u l t i - e t h n i c c o m m u n i t i e s . I n o t h e r words, t h e c o o r d i n a t i o n p r o c e s s became an e d u c a t i o n a l forum w i t h i n w h i c h p e o p l e came t o g e t h e r t h r o u g h t h e i r commitment t o r a i s e p u b l i c awareness of queer A s i a n l i v e s . Chandra T a l p a d e Mohanty ( c i t e d i n Roman and E y r e 1997, x x v i ) , a f e m i n i s t t h e o r i s t who s p e c i a l i z e s i n g l o b a l i z a t i o n , o f f e r s h e r i n s i g h t s on e d u c a t i o n i n t h e p r e f a c e t o Dangerous T e r r i t o r i e s : I f t h e academy, t h e c l a s s r o o m , and o t h e r e d u c a t i o n a l c o n t e x t s a r e n o t mere i n s t r u c t i o n a l s i t e s , b u t a r e f u n d a m e n t a l l y p o l i t i c a l and c u l t u r a l s i t e s t h a t r e p r e s e n t accommodations and c o n t e s t a t i o n s o v e r knowledge by d i f f e r e n t l y empowered s o c i a l c o n s t i t u e n c i e s , t h e n t h e p r o c e s s e s and p r a c t i c e s o f e d u c a t i o n l e a d t o p r o f o u n d l y s i g n i f i c a n t n o t i o n s o f s e l f , i d e n t i t y , and community. By e s t a b l i s h i n g t h e c o n n e c t i o n between " e d u c a t i o n a l c o n t e x t s " and " p o l i t i c a l and c u l t u r a l s i t e s , " Mohanty i s a b l e t o p o i n t out how " s e l f , i d e n t i t y , and community" a r e shaped i n b o t h l o c a t i o n s . S i m i l a r l y , t h e p r o c e s s of p r o d u c i n g Leaving Silence c r e a t e d an a c t i v i s t s i t e w i t h i n w h i c h o r g a n i z e r s s t r a t e g i z e d about how t o o f f e r p u b l i c e d u c a t i o n on queer s u b j e c t s . As p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r , I a l s o p a r t i c i p a t e d i n t h e group e x e r c i s e of n e g o t i a t i n g and d e f i n i n g r a c i a l i z e d i d e n t i t i e s . We e l a b o r a t e d upon o u r own d e f i n i t i o n s o f what i t meant t o be q u e e r and A s i a n . D u r i n g t h e c o u r s e o f b r i n g i n g up o u r i n d i v i d u a l i d e n t i t i e s and demonstrate this commitment. The reasons for this are explained in the introduction to this thesis. Queering the Pacific Northwest 77 p o l i t i c a l b e l i e f s , we ar g u e d o v e r t e r m i n o l o g y and r e p r e s e n t a t i o n . We c h a l l e n g e d o ur own and each o t h e r ' s a s s u m p t i o n s and, a t o t h e r t i m e s , v a l i d a t e d some p a r t s o f o u r s e l v e s . F o r example,- most o f t h e Wor k i n g A d v i s o r y Committee members i d e n t i f i e d as A s i a n A m e r i c a n . When Pe r v e e n A l i b r o u g h t up t h e i m p o r t a n c e of l o c a t i n g queer p o l i t i c s w i t h i n an i n t e r n a t i o n a l c o n t e x t , I i m m e d i a t e l y r e c o g n i z e d t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f i n c l u d i n g h e r n a r r a t i v e i n t h e e x h i b i t . I n o t i c e d a l a c k o f f i r s t g e n e r a t i o n i m m i g r a n t p e r s p e c t i v e s i n t h e i n t e r v i e w s . By a c c e p t i n g P e r v e e n ' s n a r r a t i v e , I f e l t t h a t my p e r s o n a l C a n a d i a n i m m i g r a n t e x p e r i e n c e was somehow b e i n g i n c l u d e d i n t h i s community p r o j e c t . I n v o l u n t e e r i n g f o r t h e p r o j e c t , Working A d v i s o r y Committee members d e m o n s t r a t e d t h e i r commitment towards b u i l d i n g t h e c a p a c i t y t o work t o g e t h e r w i t h i n t h e Queer A s i a n community. Y e t , a t t h e same t i m e , t h e i r p a r t i c i p a t i o n h e l p e d them t o g a i n e x t e r n a l r e c o g n i t i o n from s u p p o r t e r s i n m a i n s t r e a m A s i a n community o r g a n i z a t i o n s and more w h i t e - i d e n t i f i e d queer g r o u p s . Through t h i s c o l l e c t i v e d e f i n i n g o f t h e p r o j e c t , we came t o know o u r a l l i e s and t h e b a r r i e r s f a c i n g u s . We d e v e l o p e d a s u p p o r t n etwork w i t h i n S e a t t l e ' s C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t c ommunities and e s t a b l i s h e d p a r t n e r s h i p s w i t h v a r i o u s n o n - p r o f i t a g e n c i e s . On a more p e r s o n a l l e v e l , I came t o d e v e l o p a more s e c u r e i d e n t i t y a s an A s i a n l e s b i a n . I a l s o began t o r e c o g n i z e t h e b o u n d a r i e s o f v a r i o u s communities and t h e s t r u g g l e s o v e r knowledge t h a t o c c u r w i t h i n them. The E x h i b i t Format and I t s F u n c t i o n s E d u c a t i o n a l e x h i b i t s have o f t e n been c r e a t e d t o p r o v i d e a u d i e n c e s w i t h i n f o r m a t i o n on m u l t i p l e forms o f t e x t u a l d i s p l a y and v i s u a l imagery. The i n f o r m a t i o n c o n t a i n e d i n Leaving Silence i s condensed, and th e c o m b i n a t i o n o f t e x t and images r e n d e r s t h e s u b j e c t m a t t e r q u i t e a c c e s s i b l e . The o r g a n i z e r s and m y s e l f were c o n s c i o u s o f k e e p i n g t h e t e x t on t h e p a n e l s i n an a c c e s s i b l e f o r m a t . I n p a r a p h r a s i n g t h e n a r r a t i v e s , I t r i e d t o use e a s y - t o - u n d e r s t a n d p h r a s e s and s i m p l e words. W o r k i n g Queering the Pacific Northwest 78 A d v i s o r y Committee members a l s o p r o v i d e d f e e d b a c k on t h e e d i t e d n a r r a t i v e s . J u d i t h B a r r y (1991, 92),. a w r i t e r and a r t i s t who s p e c i a l i z e s i n p u b l i c a r t , d i s c u s s e s u s i n g e x h i b i t s t o a t t r a c t p u b l i c a u d i e n c e s : Moreover, an e x h i b i t i o n , i n t h a t i t i s s i t e - s p e c i f i c and' c o n f r o n t s t h e v i e w e r ' s p a s s a g e t h r o u g h t i m e and space w h i l e a r r a n g i n g a mass o f m a t e r i a l i n t o a more o r l e s s c o h e r e n t d e m o n s t r a t i o n of a p a r t i c u l a r p o i n t of v i e w , i s i n a r a t h e r complex and i n t e r a c t i v e way about t h e s t i m u l a t i o n and s h a r i n g of i d e a s . Indeed, t h i s c o u l d have been w r i t t e n w i t h r e g a r d t o Leaving Silence, w h i c h a t t e m p t s t o p o r t r a y t h e complex s u b j e c t of queer A s i a n l i v e s t h r o u g h a s e l e c t i o n of n a r r a t i v e s and accompanying images. I n d i v i d u a l n a r r a t i v e s were s i t u a t e d w i t h i n s p e c i f i c s o c i a l , c u l t u r a l , p o l i t i c a l , and h i s t o r i c a l c o n t e x t s . S i m i l a r l y , when v i e w e r s r e a d a n a r r a t i v e on an e x h i b i t p a n e l , t h e y b r o u g h t t h e i r u n d e r s t a n d i n g of t h e s u b j e c t m a t t e r w i t h them. They were l o c a t e d w i t h i n t h e i r own web of s o c i a l r e l a t i o n s , where t h e i r g enders and t h e i r c u l t u r a l and economic backgrounds i n f l u e n c e d how t h e y i n t e r p r e t e d t h e n a r r a t i v e s . The e x h i b i t c r e a t e d an i n t e r a c t i v e e n v ironment w i t h i n w h i c h v i e w e r s c o u l d e x e r c i s e t h e i r agency i n r e a d i n g t h e s u b j e c t m a t t e r c o n t a i n e d on t h e p a n e l s . The e x h i b i t space was c o n s t r u c t e d so as t o a l l o w room f o r v i e w e r s t o move ar o u n d and t o r e a d t h o s e t e x t s i n w h i c h t h e y were most i n t e r e s t e d . I t c r e a t e d . a n a l t e r n a t e k i n d of l e a r n i n g e n v i r o n m e n t , one i n w h i c h " i n f o r m a l l e a r n i n g " c o u l d t a k e p l a c e ( C a s e l l a 1999, 118). I n o t h e r words, Learning Silence became a s i t e of p u b l i c l e a r n i n g . Leaving Silence's p u b l i c d i s p l a y space c r e a t e d a s i t e where v i e w e r s ' o p i n i o n s on q u e e r n e s s c o u l d be m e d i a t e d and n e g o t i a t e d as t h e y r e a c t e d t o t h e c o n t e n t s of t h e n a r r a t i v e s . T h i s space was open t o anyone who had an i n t e r e s t i n l e a r n i n g more about queer A s i a n l i v e s . I t was an i n v i t a t i o n a l s pace, and i t encouraged t h e p u b l i c t o v i e w and i n t e r a c t w i t h a queer A s i a n community. I f t h e e x h i b i t p r o v o k e d t e n s i o n , t h i s was Queering the Pacific Northwest 79 i n t e n t i o n a l , and we, as o r g a n i z e r s , e x p e c t e d i t . T here was one i n c i d e n t d u r i n g w h i c h l i b r a r y u s e r s s p a t a t t h e e x h i b i t . The l i b r a r y s t a f f c l e a n e d t h e p a n e l and i n f o r m e d me about what had happened. There were no r e c o r d e d d i s r u p t i o n s a t Cunningham H a l l i n t h e U n i v e r s i t y o f Washington Women C e n t e r o r a t t h e H e a r t - t o - A r t G a l l e r y i n S e a t t l e . I b e l i e v e t h a t b o t h l o c a t i o n s were t a r g e t e d a t s p e c i f i c a u d i e n c e s and t h a t t h i s , t o a c e r t a i n e x t e n t , p r o t e c t e d t h e e x h i b i t . F o r example, I assume t h a t v i s i t o r s t o t h e U n i v e r s i t y o f Washington venue would, p r i m a r i l y , be s t u d e n t s , u n i v e r s i t y t e a c h i n g s t a f f and o t h e r members a f f i l i a t e d w i t h t h e i n s t i t u t i o n . And, as f o r t h e H e a r t - t o - A r t G a l l e r y , i t i s l o c a t e d i n C a p i t o l H i l l -- a q u e e r - f r i e n d l y n e i g h b o u r h o o d . We b e l i e v e d t h a t l o c a t i n g t h e e x h i b i t i n c e n t r a l p u b l i c a r e a s was an i d e a l way o f e d u c a t i n g t h e p u b l i c about queer A s i a n l i v e s . Commenting on t h e a c c e s s i b i l i t y o f e x h i b i t s , B a r r y (1991, 93) has t h i s t o say: By g r e a t l y e n l a r g i n g p h o t o g r a p h s o r i g i n a l l y r e p r o d u c e d i n books o r magazines, [ e x h i b i t s ] s u c c e e d e d i n t r a n s f o r m i n g a v i s u a l t e x t i n t o s o m e t h i n g c l o s e r t o mass propaganda o r a d v e r t i s i n g . I n t h i s r e s p e c t , [ t h e y ] f u n c t i o n e d l i k e an i n v e r s i o n o f r e a d i n g , as a t y p e o f f a n t a s y e x p e r i e n c e s u s t a i n e d by a c i n e m a t i c s c a l e o f imagery and by t h e p o t e n t i a l f o r group r e c e p t i o n . The p h o t o s i n Leaving Silence were o f f e r e d as v i s u a l e v i d e n c e o f queer A s i a n l i v e s . Combined w i t h t h e n a r r a t i v e s , t h e y s e r v e d a s e r i o u s f u n c t i o n : t o p r o v i d e t h e p u b l i c w i t h d o c u m e n t a t i o n o f t h e l i v e d e x p e r i e n c e s o f m a r g i n a l i z e d p o p u l a t i o n s . The n a r r a t o r s ' w i l l i n g n e s s t o f a c e p u b l i c e x p o s u r e , b o t h t e x t u a l l y and v i s u a l l y , s t r e n g t h e n e d o ur c o l l e c t i v e s t r u g g l e f o r queer A s i a n v i s i b i l i t y . The i n t e r v i e w t r a n s c r i p t s , t h e a u d i o t a p e s , t h e b l a c k - a n d - w h i t e p h o t o p o r t r a i t s , and th e f i l m s t o c k a l l became r e c o r d s t h a t documented t h e l i v e s o f members of t h e queer A s i a n community. T h i s c o l l e c t i o n o f d a t a c o n s t i t u t e s o ur f i r s t s t e p towards k e e p i n g r e c o r d s o f , and m a i n t a i n i n g c o n t i n u i t y w i t h i n , o u r a c t i v i s t c o m m u n i t i e s . They p r o v i d e a l i n k between d i f f e r e n t Queering the Pacific Northwest 80 g e n e r a t i o n s of s o c i a l movements. And t h e y p r o v i d e us w i t h i n s i g h t s i n t o c u r r e n t and p a s t o r g a n i z i n g p a t t e r n s , t h e s u c c e s s e s and f a i l u r e s o f v a r i o u s i n i t i a t i v e s . T h i s b e i n g t h e c a s e , t h e i n f o r m a t i o n we g a t h e r e d cannot h e l p b u t be i n s t r u m e n t a l i n t h e f o r m a t i o n of a h e a l t h i e r and more s e l f - a f f i r m i n g s o c i a l movement (Shah 1998, 153). What makes a c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s a p p r o a c h t o pedagogy c h a l l e n g i n g t o t h e t r a d i t i o n a l e d u c a t i o n a l d i s c o u r s e i s t h e s h i f t i n g of what c o u n t s as " f o r m a l l e a r n i n g s i t e s " ( C a s e l l a 1999, 117-18). I n s t e a d o f f o c u s i n g on c l a s s r o o m s o r more c o n t r o l l e d l e a r n i n g e n v i r o n m e n t s , pedagogy i n t h e c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s v e i n f o c u s e s on b r o a d e n i n g o u r d e f i n i t i o n s of what c o u n t s as e d u c a t i o n . When I t a l k about a c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s a p p r o a c h t o pedagogy, I am r e f e r r i n g t o what L e s l i e Roman and L i n d a E y r e (1997) c a l l "a- f e m i n i s t m a t e r i a l i s t p o l i t i c s o f c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s . " Roman and E y r e argue t h a t t h e p r o d u c t i o n of c u l t u r a l c o m modities i s c a p i t a l i s t i n n a t u r e and i s i n t e n d e d f o r c e r t a i n a u d i e n c e s . W i t h t h i s i n mind, I came t o q u e s t i o n e v e r y d a y p o p u l a r c u l t u r a l forms such-as magazines, f i l m s , and t e l e v i s i o n programs. These c u l t u r a l forms a r e i n v o l v e d i n t i m a t e l y i n s e c u r i n g and p r o d u c i n g t h e c o n s e n t of women and men t o p a r t i c u l a r hegemonic meanings f o r gender ( t h e r e l a t i o n a l c a t e g o r i e s o f f e m i n i n i t y and m a s c u l i n i t y a t a p a r t i c u l a r h i s t o r i c j u n c t u r e ) and s e x u a l d i f f e r e n c e . A t s t a k e i n t h e s t r u g g l e s and c o n t e s t a t i o n s o v e r t h e s e meanings a r e n o t o n l y t e x t u a l r e p r e s e n t a t i o n s o f f e m i n i n i t y and gender r e l a t i o n s i n p a r t i c u l a r c u l t u r a l c o m m o d i t i e s , b u t a l s o t h e i r p l a c e and s i g n i f i c a n c e i n t h e l i v e s of t h e a c t u a l women and men who consume, use, and make se n s e o f them i n t h e c o n t e x t of t h e i r d a i l y p r a c t i c e s and s o c i a l r e l a t i o n s . (Roman and E y r e 1997, 3-4) F o r example, t h e p o p u l a r i t y of d i r e c t o r Ang Lee's 1993 movie, The Wedding Banquet, b r o u g h t N o r t h A m e r i c a n a u d i e n c e s t o t h e a t r e s t o l e a r n about what i t means t o be a T a i w a n e s e - C h i n e s e gay man. The s t o r y r e v o l v e s a r o u n d Gao Wai Tung, who l i v e s i n t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s w i t h h i s w h i t e A m e r i c a n l o v e r , Simon. H i s p a r e n t s o f t e n a s k about h i s m a r r i a g e p l a n s and p r e s s u r e him t o have a f a m i l y of h i s own. Bowing t o h i s p a r e n t s ' w i s h e s , Tung approaches Wei, a t e n a n t i n one of h i s a p a r t m e n t s . Queering the Pacific Northwest 81 S i n c e Wei needs an i m m i g r a n t v i s a , t h e y a g r e e t o marry: t h i s w o u l d work w e l l f o r b o t h of them as i t w o u l d p r o v i d e h e r w i t h a v i s a and him w i t h h i s p a r e n t s ' a p p r o v a l . U n f o r t u n a t e l y , Wei g e t s p r e g n a n t d u r i n g a s e x u a l e p i s o d e w i t h Tung f o l l o w i n g t h e wedding banquet. Through meandering, humorous t w i s t s i n v o l v i n g s e c r e t s and l i e s , t h e s t o r y ends h a p p i l y , w i t h Simon, Tung, and Wei a g r e e i n g t o r a i s e t h e c h i l d and w i t h Tung's f a t h e r a c c e p t i n g h i s son's gay r e l a t i o n s h i p . The power of The Wedding Banquet l i e s i n i t s a b i l i t y t o b l e n d humour w i t h t h e s e r i o u s i s s u e of b e i n g a gay A s i a n man. A gay f r i e n d of mine's s u p p o r t i v e s i b l i n g s showed t h e movie t o t h e i r e l d e r l y p a r e n t s i n o r d e r t o g e n t l y i n t r o d u c e t h e t o p i c of b e i n g a gay A s i a n man. A f t e r v i e w i n g t h e movie, t h e y d i s c u s s e d t h e s t o r y and what i t w o u l d mean f o r them t o have a gay son. S i n c e t h e n , my f r i e n d has been a b l e t o s l o w l y d r o p more h i n t s p e r t a i n i n g t o h i s s e x u a l i d e n t i t y i n t o f a m i l y c o n v e r s a t i o n s . I n p a r t i c u l a r , t h e c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s a p p r o a c h t o pedagogy e n a b l e s us t o u n d e r s t a n d t h e p o t e n t i a l m a t e r i a l e f f e c t s of community p r o j e c t s s u c h as Leaving Silence. D r a w i n g t h e l i n k s between p o p u l a r c u l t u r a l forms and t h e i r f u n c t i o n i n d e s t a b i l i z i n g meanings, Roman and E y r e h i g h l i g h t t h e p o s s i b i l i t y o f s o c i a l t r a n s f o r m a t i o n o c c u r r i n g i n u n l i k e l y s i t e s . A c l e a r example of t h i s i s t h e use of b u s - s t o p b i l l b o a r d s as a venue t o s p r e a d s a f e r - s e x messages. I n San F r a n c i s c o , t h e l a t e s t s t u d i e s by t h e Department of P u b l i c H e a l t h showed a r i s e o f HIV i n f e c t i o n among younger gay men. T h e r e f o r e , a m a r k e t i n g campaign t a r g e t i n g t h i s p a r t i c u l a r a u d i e n c e u s e d s e x u a l l y e x p l i c i t images and t h e s l o g a n "How do you know what you know?" on b u s - s t o p b i l l b o a r d s and a d v e r t i s e m e n t s a l o n g t h e s i d e s of b u s e s . Leaving Silence, as a p o p u l a r c u l t u r a l form, c h a l l e n g e s i t s v i e w e r s t o r e a s s e s s t h e i r n o t i o n s of what i t means t o be queer and A s i a n . And, i n so d o i n g , i t r e v e a l s i t s p o t e n t i a l as a t o o l f o r s o c i a l change. Ronnie C a s e l l a (1999, 119) comments on t h e i n c o r p o r a t i o n of c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s i n t o pedagogy: Queering the Pacific Northwest 82 E t h n o g r a p h i c f i x a t i o n s on " s i t e s " -- s u c h as a s c h o o l -- have been t a k e n up by r e s e a r c h e r s w i t h a d d i t i o n a l emphases on t h e more d i s p e r s i v e " p l a c e s " where e d u c a t i o n o c c u r s : i n o u r movie t h e a t e r s , f o r example, o r t h r o u g h computers and v i d e o s , o r i n p o p u l a r e d u c a t i o n a l endeavours such as museum-going and e d u c a t i o n a l t r a v e l . I n l o o k i n g f o r ways t o u n d e r s t a n d Leaving Silence as a p u b l i c p e d a g o g i c a l t o o l , t h e f i e l d o f c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s i n e d u c a t i o n p r o p o s e s l o o k i n g a t how mass media and p o p u l a r c u l t u r e c o n t r i b u t e t o our u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f e v e r y d a y l i v e s . We, as i n d i v i d u a l s , a r e o b v i o u s l y i n f l u e n c e d by t h o s e c u l t u r a l f o r c e s t h a t d e t e r m i n e how we c o n s t r u c t o ur i n t e r p r e t a t i o n s o f t h e w o r l d . P o p u l a r c u l t u r a l f o r c e s can o c c u r i n t h e form o f mus i c , f i l m s , p o p u l a r n o v e l s , t e l e v i s i o n s e r i e s , o r f a s h i o n magazines. By c a r e f u l l y a n a l y z i n g t h e r o l e s s o c i a l i n s t i t u t i o n s , t h e media, and e d u c a t i o n a l e s t a b l i s h m e n t s p l a y i n m a r g i n a l i z i n g c e r t a i n - p o p u l a t i o n s , we can p o i n t o ut how, t h r o u g h t h e f o m e n t i n g o f v a r i o u s c u r r i c u l a and agendas, t h e y s y s t e m a t i c a l l y d e t e r m i n e who i s f a v o u r e d and who i s n o t . The Queer A s i a n S u b j e c t On E x h i b i t C u l t u r a l c r i t i c Charmaine P e r k i n s (1997, 247-48), i n h e r e s s a y "Any More C o l o u r f u l We'd Have To Censor I t , " d i s c u s s e s t h e term " p o p u l a r " : By t h e term p o p u l a r , I i n t e n d t o convey t h e v a r i o u s meanings of g e n e r a l l y a c c e p t e d a s s u m p t i o n s , what u s u a l l y p a s s e s f o r common sense, a k i n d o f homogenized p u b l i c knowledge, as w e l l as t h e way i n w h i c h i n f o r m a t i o n / k n o w l e d g e i s encoded and t r a n s m i t t e d v i a mass media t o form and i n f o r m p o p u l a r o p i n i o n , and i n d e e d , shape c o n s c i o u s n e s s . The f o c u s o f pedagogy upon f o r m a l e d u c a t i o n a l c o n t e x t s undermines our a b i l i t y t o u n d e r s t a n d t h e r o l e p o p u l a r c u l t u r e p l a y s i n i n f o r m i n g o u r c o n s c i o u s n e s s . I n u s i n g t h e word "queer" i n t h e p r e s s r e l e a s e s and, more i m p o r t a n t , t h e e x h i b i t ' s m i s s i o n s t a t e m e n t , we p u t o u r s e l v e s a t Queering the Pacific Northwest 83 r i s k o f e n c o u n t e r i n g t h e p o p u l a r u n d e r s t a n d i n g s o f "queer." As has been mentioned, t h e word "queer" has d i f f e r e n t c o n n o t a t i o n s f o r d i f f e r e n t g e n e r a t i o n s : f o r an o l d e r g e n e r a t i o n , t h e t e r m i s a r e m i n d e r o f homophobic abuse, f o r a younger g e n e r a t i o n , i t f u n c t i o n s as a p o s i t i v e a f f i r m a t i o n o f s e l f ( S m i t h 1992, 2 2 ) . The word a l s o has d i f f e r e n t meanings and c o n n o t a t i o n s when used by h e t e r o s e x u a l s and when u s e d by l e s b i a n s , gay men, b i s e x u a l s , and t h e t r a n s g e n d e r e d . One of t h e p u r p o s e s of Leaving Silence was t o ed u c a t e t h e p u b l i c about t h e word "queer" and th e meaning i t has f o r t h o s e who i d e n t i f y as queer and A s i a n . I n t h e e x h i b i t ' s i n t r o d u c t o r y b o o k l e t I o f f e r e d t h e f o l l o w i n g e x p l a n a t i o n f o r o u r use o f t h e term: The word "queer" was t r a d i t i o n a l l y u s e d as a d e r o g a t o r y term t o w a r d l e s b i a n s , gays, b i s e x u a l s and t r a n s g e n d e r e d . By r e c l a i m i n g t h e word "queer", we a r e now u s i n g [ i t ] t o e x p r e s s our s e x u a l i d e n t i t i e s i n s t e a d o f h a v i n g someone e l s e naming our s e x u a l i d e n t i t i e s . L i t e r a l l y , t h e word "queer" i s a l s o i n c l u s i v e o f l e s b i a n s , gays, b i s e x u a l s and t r a n s g e n d e r e d . So, does Leaving Silence amount t o what J u d i t h B a r r y (1991, 93) r e f e r s t o as "mass propaganda o r a d v e r t i s i n g " ? I t h i n k i t does n o t ; r a t h e r , I t h i n k i t s u b v e r t s m a i n s t r e a m propaganda by p o p u l a r i z i n g t h e queer and r a c i a l i z e d s u b j e c t . The p r e s e n c e o f queer A s i a n s u b j e c t s l e a d s t o d e b a t e s a r o u n d r a c i a l i z e d and gen d e r e d i d e n t i t i e s , and t h i s , i n t u r n , p r o b l e m a t i z e s n o t i o n s about what c o n s t i t u t e s a p p r o p r i a t e s u b j e c t m a t t e r f o r a p u b l i c e x h i b i t . Leaving Silence e f f e c t i v e l y d i s p l a y s a u s u a l l y h i d d e n s u b j e c t . I t t a k e s t h i s s u b j e c t and m a g n i f i e s i t t h r o u g h a s e l e c t i o n o f p h o t o g r a p h s and n a r r a t i v e s . I n so d o i n g , i t d i r e c t l y c o n f r o n t s t h e t a boo o f h o m o s e x u a l i t y w i t h i n queer A s i a n c o m m u n i t i e s . R i c h a r d Fung, a queer A s i a n v i d e o a r t i s t and a c t i v i s t b a s e d i n T o r o n t o , p r o d u c e d a v i d e o e n t i t l e d Dirty Laundry. T h i s v i d e o d e p i c t s h o m o e r o t i c i s m among male C h i n e s e w o r k e r s d u r i n g t h e c o n s t r u c t i o n o f t h e C a n a d i a n r a i l r o a d s i n t h e l a t e n i n e t e e n t h c e n t u r y (Lee, c i t e d i n Eng and Horn 1998, 192-93). Among Queering the Pacific Northwest 84 C h i n e s e , t h e t e r m " d i r t y l a u n d r y " d e n o t e s a f o r b i d d e n m a t t e r , a s h a m e f u l h a p p e n i n g o r an u n t o u c h a b l e and u n m e n t i o n a b l e f a m i l y i s s u e . Leaving Silence i s an a t t e m p t t o d i s p e l q u e e r n e s s as " d i r t y l a u n d r y " and t o a s s e r t i t s l e g i t i m a c y . C l e a r l y , t h e p u b l i c d e c l a r a t i o n of same-sex d e s i r e i s a dangerous m a t t e r f o r A s i a n l e s b i a n , gays, b i s e x u a l s , and t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e o p l e . The r i s k o f l o s i n g f a m i l y s u p p o r t , n e v e r mind a n y t h i n g e l s e , i s enough t o make one r e c o n s i d e r h e r / h i s d e c i s i o n t o come o u t . E l a b o r a t i n g on t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f f a m i l y s u p p o r t , R i c h a r d Fung ( c i t e d i n Eng and Horn 1998, 118) has t h i s t o say: As i s t h e case f o r many o t h e r p e o p l e o f c o l o r and e s p e c i a l l y i m m i g r a n t s , our f a m i l i e s and our e t h n i c communities a r e a r a r e s o u r c e o f a f f i r m a t i o n i n a r a c i s t s o c i e t y . I n coming o u t , we r i s k (or f e e l t h a t we r i s k ) l o s i n g t h i s s u p p o r t , though t h e e v e r - g r o w i n g o r g a n i z a t i o n s o f l e s b i a n and gay A s i a n s have worked a g a i n s t t h i s p r o c e s s o f c u l t u r a l e x i l e . By t a k i n g p a r t i n a p u b l i c d e m o n s t r a t i o n o f t h e queer A s i a n s u b j e c t , Leaving Silence's n a r r a t o r s , t h e i r f r i e n d s , and t h e i r f a m i l i e s showed tremendous c o u r a g e . They t o o k t h e r i s k o f b e i n g o s t r a c i z e d by t h e i r c ommunities and by t h e i r l o v e d ones, and t h e y t o o k t h e r i s k o f l o s i n g t h e i r j o b s , h o u s i n g , and even t h e i r l i v e s . F a c i l i t a t i n g D i a l o g u e s w i t h i n t h e P u b l i c Sphere R e f e r r i n g t o t h e r e c e n t i n c r e a s e d media c o v e r a g e o f f e m i n i s t movements and l e s b i a n i s s u e s i n Taiwan, Deborah Tze-Lan Sang ( c i t e d i n Yang 1999, 13 5) comments: The p u b l i c s p h e r e i n Taiwan has become a s i t e o f c o n t e s t a t i o n between d i f f e r e n t d i s c o u r s e s : s c i e n t i f i c n o r m a l i z a t i o n , p a t r i a r c h a l f a m i l y v a l u e s , s e n s a t i o n a l i s m , f e m i n i s t and queer academic t h e o r i e s , and t h e l i b e r a t o r y s e l f - r e p r e s e n t a t i o n o f a new i m a g i n e d community o f l e s b i a n s . By l o c a t i n g t h e e x h i b i t i n p u b l i c s p a c e s , we g e n e r a t e d as much d i a l o g u e as we c o u l d o v e r what i t means t o be queer and A s i a n . And we Queering the Pacific Northwest 85 i n v i t e d b o t h n e g a t i v e and p o s i t i v e f e e d b a c k . I n S e a t t l e , t h e e x h i b i t was p r i m a r i l y c o v e r e d by e t h n i c media p r e s s s u c h as Northwest Nikkei, t h e International Examiner, and t h e Northwest Asian Weekly. The media c o v e r a g e t e n d e d t o be s u p p o r t i v e o f t h e p r o j e c t . One of t h e main r e a s o n s f o r t h i s , of c o u r s e , i n v o l v e s t h e l e a d e r s o f t h e e t h n i c community, who, e a r l y on, e n d o r s e d t h e p r o j e c t . However, when t h e e x h i b i t was shown i n P o r t l a n d , Oregon, c o n t r o v e r s i e s s u r r o u n d i n g i t c o v e r e d t h e e d i t o r i a l pages o f t h e Oregonian and t h e Asian Reporter. A c o l u m n i s t i n t h e Oregonian, S t e v e D u i n , o p e n l y a t t a c k e d t h e e x h i b i t as a r i d i c u l o u s form of s e l f - e x p r e s s i o n . I n h i s words, t h e e x h i b i t was "a t i m e l y r e m i n d e r [of t he] m o r b i d p r e o c c u p a t i o n w i t h s e l f " (The Sunday O r e g o n i a n , 18 May 1997, D l ) . I n r e s p o n s e , L e s l i e G r i e p , member of t h e b o a r d o f A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r L e s b i a n s and Gays, w r o t e : The p u r p o s e o f t h i s e x h i b i t i s n o t i n t r o s p e c t i o n o r b e i n g o b s e s s e d w i t h s e l f o r " t o hoot and h o l l e r and embrace our e x c l u s i v i t y " ... i t i s about how i n c r e a s e d u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f o u r s e l v e s and each o t h e r a f f e c t s human r e l a t i o n s h i p s . The e x h i b i t i s about b r e a k i n g t h r o u g h i n v i s i b i l i t y , m i s c o n c e p t i o n s and s t e r e o t y p e s about A s i a n s and q u e e r s . (The Oregonian, 28 May 1997, L e t t e r s t o E d i t o r s ) One of t h e p e d a g o g i c a l v a l u e s of Leaving Silence l i e s i n i t s m a r k e t i n g s t r a t e g y , i t s a b i l i t y t o r e a c h many communities and t o i n f o r m them about i s s u e s r e l a t i n g t o r a c e and q u e e r n e s s . F o r t u n a t e l y , most o f t h e members of t h e Working A d v i s o r y Committee were a l r e a d y a s s o c i a t e d w i t h community a g e n c i e s and had e s t a b l i s h e d l i n k s w i t h v a r i o u s l o c a l newspaper p u b l i s h e r s . T h i s , o f c o u r s e , f a c i l i t a t e d o ur a t t e m p t s t o p u b l i c i z e t h e e x h i b i t . Leaving Silence i s an e d u c a t i o n a l t o o l , and i t i s o u r hope t h a t i t w i l l c o n t i n u e t o be us e d t o combat t h e s e n s a t i o n a l i z i n g o f queer s e x u a l i t i e s . The e x h i b i t t r i e d t o n o r m a l i z e queer A s i a n l i v e s by p u b l i c i z i n g a s e r i e s o f i s s u e s t h a t a f f e c t t h e queer A s i a n community. T h i s was our r e s p o n s e t o t h e way i n w h i c h m a i n s t r e a m s o c i e t y d e n i e s t h e Queering the Pacific Northwest 86 fact that queer i n d i v i d u a l s lead "normal" d a i l y l i v e s -- l i v e s that involve many of the same everyday a c t i v i t i e s as do those of everyone else. P o l i c y makers and others i n positi o n s of power continue to see queer populations as. s p e c i a l i n t e r e s t groups rather than as people who are c o n s i s t e n t l y and systematically denied s o c i a l j u s t i c e . Community agencies, art c o l l e c t i v e s , and i n d i v i d u a l p o l i t i c a l a r t i s t s have organized public a rt i n s t a l l a t i o n s and poster campaigns i n order to address the i n t e r s e c t i o n of race, class, and sexua l i t y among Asian and P a c i f i c Islander communities. The pub l i c nature of these projects succeeded i n bringing what i s perceived to be a pr i v a t e a f f a i r i nto the pu b l i c realm. The commonly held view of queer s e x u a l i t y --" i t ' s okay that you're that way, as long as you keep i t i n your bedroom" -- i s challenged by the "flaunting" stance taken up by pub l i c projects. For example, two anti-homophobia poster campaigns targeted the mainstream East Asian and Southeast Asian communities i n Vancouver, B r i t i s h Columbia, and the Asian and P a c i f i c Islander communities i n Seattle, Washington. Both of these campaigns brought public attention to the existence of queer Asians and P a c i f i c Islanders, 2 3 and both posters depicted over 100 community leaders and a c t i v i s t s -- both queer-i d e n t i f i e d and heter o s e x u a l - i d e n t i f i e d -- who had come together to support the elimination of homophobia. They also paved the way for s i m i l a r v i s i b i l i t y campaigns. Mediating Activism i n Educational Research A severe notion of privacy, that what one "does" i n priv a t e should be of l i t t l e consequence i n pu b l i c . The fact i s that schools mediate the discourses of pr i v a t e and public work to leave i n t a c t the view that (homo)sexualities must be hidden. Moreover, the insistence that s e x u a l i t y i s to be confined to 23 United Against Homophobia was coordinated by a coalition of community organizations in Seattle, Washington. Most agencies involved with this poster campaign were also active contributors to the Leaving Silence exhibit. Modelled after United Against Homophobia, Diverse City was a poster campaign organized by the Asian Society for the Intervention of AIDS, a Vancouver-based agency that provided HIV/AIDS prevention education to East Asian and Southeast Asian populations. Queering the Pacific Northwest 87 t h e p r i v a t e s p h e r e r e d u c e s s e x u a l i t y t o t h e l i t e r a l and s p e c i f i c s e x u a l p r a c t i c e s one p e r f o r m s , as i f e x p e r i m e n t a t i o n w i t h s e x u a l c o n d u c t were an e q u a l o p p o r t u n i t y e x p e r i e n c e . ( B r i t z m a n , c i t e d i n C a s t e l l and B r y s o n 1997, 192) I n a s s e s s i n g t h e p e r v a s i v e f o r c e o f homophobia i n our s o c i e t y , we must a s k how our p u b l i c e d u c a t i o n s y s t e m p e r p e t u a t e s d i s c r i m i n a t i n g a t t i t u d e s t o w a r d s , and measures a g a i n s t , l e s b i a n s , gays, b i s e x u a l s , and t r a n s g e n d e r e d p e r s o n s . S c h o o l d i s c u s s i o n s p e r t a i n i n g t o s e x u a l i t y a r e s t i l l c o n f i n e d t o h e t e r o s e x u a l i t y and t h e n u c l e a r f a m i l y . T h i s t y p e o f e x c l u s i v e c u r r i c u l u m c l e a r l y c o n t r i b u t e s t o a l a c k o f u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f queer i s s u e s . The mere m e n t i o n o f a queer s u b j e c t i s enough t o evoke d e f e n s i v e r e a c t i o n s from p a r e n t s and t e a c h e r s . A c l e a r example o f t h i s may be seen i n t h e r e a c t i o n o f t h e S u r r e y S c h o o l B o a r d t o t h e a t t e m p t t o i n t r o d u c e t h r e e books t h a t l o o k e d f a v o u r a b l y upon same-sex r e l a t i o n s h i p s . The b o a r d i n s i s t e d t h a t t h e s e t h r e e books be banned. I n A p r i l 1997, James C h a m b e r l a i n , a S u r r e y t e a c h e r , s u b m i t t e d Asha's Mums, Belinda's Bouquet, and One Dad, Two Dads, Brown Dads, Blue Dads f o r a p p r o v a l f o r use i n k i n d e r g a r t e n and Grade 1 c l a s s r o o m s . The b o a r d members v o t e d f o u r t o two t o ban t h e books from a l l s c h o o l s i n t h e S u r r e y d i s t r i c t . Even though e i g h t e e n o u t o f t w e n t y f a m i l i e s i n C h a m b e r l a i n ' s c l a s s p e t i t i o n e d i n f a v o u r o f r e t a i n i n g t h e books i n t h e c u r r i c u l u m , t h e S u r r e y S c h o o l B o a r d p r o c e e d e d t o cond u c t a s u r v e y o f a l l p a r e n t s o f e l e m e n t a r y s c h o o l c h i l d r e n i n S u r r e y . The s u r v e y a s k e d one q u e s t i o n : "Do you ag r e e w i t h t h e use of m a t e r i a l s s u c h as books, v i d e o s and/or p r e s e n t e r s from t h e Gay and L e s b i a n E d u c a t o r s o f BC f o r c l a s s r o o m i n s t r u c t i o n f o r K i n d e r g a r t e n t h r o u g h Grade 7?" There was o n l y space f o r a "yes o r no" answer. The B r i t i s h C o l u m b i a Human R i g h t s Commission l a t e r r u l e d t h a t t h e s u r v e y was d i s c r i m i n a t o r y as i t u n f a i r l y t a r g e t e d gays and l e s b i a n s . How do we m e d i a t e between t h e v a l u e s o f a n t i -o p p r e s s i o n w o r k e r s and t h o s e o f ma i n s t r e a m e d u c a t i o n a l r e s e a r c h and p r a c t i c e ? How can p r o g r e s s i v e e d u c a t o r s h e l p t o c r e a t e a s a f e space f o r t h e queer s u b j e c t ? Queering the Pacific Northwest 88 F e m i n i s t c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s e d u c a t o r s a t t e m p t t o " e x p e r i m e n t w i t h new models f o r t e a c h i n g and l e a r n i n g [ -- models] t h a t b e t t e r c o n n e c t what o c c u r s i n t h e c l a s s r o o m t o e f f o r t s a t s o c i a l t r a n s f o r m a t i o n " ( H y t t e n 1999, 541). S t r a t e g i e s can r ange from c u r r i c u l a r c h o i c e s t o a c t i v e l y l i s t e n i n g t o s t u d e n t s who a r e p a r t i c i p a t i n g i n p r o g r e s s i v e s o c i a l movements. F e m i n i s t e d u c a t o r s have t r i e d t o b r i n g s o c i a l a c t i v i s m i n t o t h e i r p e d a g o g i c a l p r a c t i c e ; t h e y have c o n t i n u o u s l y sought t o i n c r e a s e t h e a c t i v i s t c o n t e n t i n t h e i r t e a c h i n g m a t e r i a l s d e s p i t e i n s t i t u t i o n a l b a r r i e r s ; t h e y have i n v i t e d s o c i a l a c t i v i s t s and community a c t i v i s t s t o g i v e g u e s t l e c t u r e s and s e m i n a r s ; and t h e y have encouraged s t u d e n t s t o f o c u s t h e i r r e s e a r c h on s t r e e t - b a s e d a c t i v i t i e s and community p r o j e c t s . I b e l i e v e t h a t , i f e d u c a t o r s and s t u d e n t s acknowledge each o t h e r as consumers and c r i t i c a l r e a d e r s of s o c i a l messages, t h e n t h i s c o u l d have f a r - r e a c h i n g i m p l i c a t i o n s f o r t h e c l a s s r o o m . F o r example, i n e n c o u r a g i n g s t u d e n t s t o o b t a i n academic c r e d i t by v o l u n t e e r i n g i n a n o n - p r o f i t community-based o r g a n i z a t i o n , t h e y can t e s t t h e i r academic knowledge and g a i n v a l u a b l e s k i l l s i n n e g o t i a t i n g t h e academic/community b a l a n c e . F u r t h e r m o r e , f e m i n i s m has c o n t r i b u t e d t o a c r i t i c a l a n a l y s i s of power r e l a t i o n s w i t h i n e d u c a t i o n a l i n s t i t u t i o n s . F e m i n i s t pedagogy, i n p a r t i c u l a r , demands t h e c l o s e i n v e s t i g a t i o n of p a t r i a r c h a l power r e l a t i o n s and t h e i r e f f e c t on s o c i a l i n s t i t u t i o n s . I t encourages b o t h t e a c h e r s and s t u d e n t s t o l o c a t e t h e m s e l v e s w i t h i n a n e t w o r k of gendered, r a c i a l i z e d , p o l i t i c a l , and c u l t u r a l r e l a t i o n s . I t a l s o a s k s us t o r e c o g n i z e t h e r e a l i t y of a " p a t r i a r c h a l model of pedagogy," w h i c h Carmen Luke (1996, 284) d e f i n e s as c o n s i s t i n g o f " h i e r a r c h y , c a n o n i c a l a u t h o r i t y , o b j e c t i v i s m , and c o m p e t i t i v e i n d i v i d u a l i s m . " F e m i n i s t pedagogy p r o b l e m a t i z e s t h e way i n w h i c h knowledge i s p r o d u c e d . F e m i n i s t pedagogues f i g h t t o make p e o p l e aware of t h e power s t r u c t u r e s i n h e r e n t w i t h i n our i n s t i t u t i o n s and our gendered i d e n t i t i e s . They r e c o g n i z e t h e i m p o r t a n c e of f e m i n i s t s c h o l a r s h i p , and t h e y p r a c t i s e a pedagogy t h a t Queering the Pacific Northwest 89 i n v o l v e s a deep understanding of the in t e r c o n n e c t i o n s between racism, sexism, homophobia, c l a s s i s m , and ableism. Such work, e x e m p l i f i e d i n Roman and Eyre's (1997) f e m i n i s t m a t e r i a l i s t approach to c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s , i s c l e a r l y r e l e v a n t to the a n a l y s i s of Leaving Silence. Recently, f e m i n i s t pedagogic p r a c t i c e has focused on the e f f e c t s of g l o b a l i z a t i o n and d i m i n i s h i n g economic borders upon a l i b e r a t i n g e ducational p r a c t i c e . Chandra Talpade Mohanty ( c i t e d i n Roman and Eyre 1997, x v i ) h i g h l i g h t s the urgent need f o r f e m i n i s t educators to create " t r u l y democratic p u b l i c spaces where people of a l l 'races,' c l a s s e s , genders, and s e x u a l i t i e s are aut h o r i z e d to act as c i t i z e n s -- to understand, organize, and demand j u s t i c e and eq u i t y . " Leaving Silence, as a community p r o j e c t , i s an attempt to m o b i l i z e i n d i v i d u a l s who are committed to advancing the r i g h t s of queer pop u l a t i o n s . The p r o j e c t was coordinated on the b a s i s of a democratic v i s i o n that assumed the importance of p u b l i c p a r t i c i p a t i o n . We d i d not cre a t e Leaving Silence as a p r o j e c t w i t h a s p e c i f i c a l l y woman-centred agenda; however, we recognize that i t s c o l l a b o r a t i o n and production processes are demonstrative of f e m i n i s t p r i n c i p l e s . Our i n t e r v i e w i n g s t r a t e g y made use of p a r t i c i p a t o r y i n t e r v i e w i n g techniques that value s e l f - r e f l e x i v i t y and r e c i p r o c i t y . In choosing the n a r r a t i v e s , we focused on d i v e r s i t y . In r a i s i n g the i s s u e of what i t means to belong to a r a c i a l and sexual m i n o r i t y , Leaving Silence, as i t s t i t l e i m p l i e s , helped to render queer Asians both v i s i b l e and v o c a l . I f education i s the way to decolonize knowledges, then we need to c r i t i c a l l y examine our pedagogical p r a c t i c e s and the educational i n s t i t u t i o n s behind them. We a l s o need to address d i f f e r e n c e s w i t h i n t h e i r c u l t u r a l and h i s t o r i c a l contexts as w e l l as w i t h i n school c u r r i c u l a . And we need to challenge our assumptions as w e l l as those of our colleagues and students. Feminist pedagogy has continued to encourage students and educators a l i k e to p r a c t i s e a n t i - o p p r e s s i o n values. I t has a l s o pointed to the need to examine the purpose of Queering the Pacific Northwest 90 r e s e a r c h d e d i c a t e d t o s o c i a l change, b e l l hooks (1994, 194), a f e m i n i s t e d u c a t o r , f i l m , and p o p u l a r c u l t u r e c r i t i c , s u g g e s t s t h a t e d u c a t o r s s h o u l d be h e l d r e s p o n s i b l e f o r p r o v i d i n g s t u d e n t s w i t h knowledge t h a t r a i s e s s o c i a l c o n s c i o u s n e s s and encourages them t o v i e w l i f e w i t h a c r i t i c a l eye. I n a d d i t i o n , she p r o p o s e s t h a t f e m i n i s t e d u c a t o r s "have a l w a y s r e c o g n i z e d t h e l e g i t i m a c y o f a pedagogy t h a t d a r e s t o s u b v e r t t h e mind/body s p l i t and a l l o w us t o be whole i n t h e c l a s s r o o m , and as a consequence w h o l e h e a r t e d " ( i b i d . ) . We can c r e a t e a l e a r n i n g s p a c e t h a t i n c l u d e s emotions and d e s i r e r a t h e r t h a n one t h a t r e j e c t s them as i l l o g i c a l -- a l e a r n i n g space t h a t a l l o w s open d i s c u s s i o n s on s u b j e c t m a t t e r s t h a t evoke p h y s i c a l r e a c t i o n s , r e g a r d l e s s o f anger o r sadnes s . I n l i n k i n g t h e mind and t h e body, t h e p r o c e s s o f l e a r n i n g becomes more human. T h i s l e a r n i n g e n v i r o n m e n t can open pathways t h a t w i l l l e a d us t o u n f a m i l i a r and f o r b i d d e n t e r r i t o r i e s , s u c h as o p e n l y d i s c l o s i n g one's f e e l i n g s about what i s b e i n g t a u g h t w i t h i n a c l a s s r o o m s e t t i n g . As a r e s u l t , l e a r n i n g become an e x e r c i s e i n making s e n s e o f s u b j e c t m a t t e r t h r o u g h b o t h our i n t e l l e c t u a l f a c u l t i e s and o u r s e n s o r y r e c e p t o r s . . Leaving Silence a t t e m p t s t o augment t h e c a p a c i t y o f o p p r e s s e d communities t o m o b i l i z e a r o u n d s o c i a l and p o l i t i c a l i s s u e s . From t h e e x h i b i t ' s i n c e p t i o n t o i t s d i s p l a y as an e x h i b i t , i t b r o u g h t d i f f e r e n t members i n S e a t t l e ' s C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t and t h e l o c a l q ueer A s i a n community t o g e t h e r t o s h a r e t h e same v i s i o n i n r a i s i n g queer A s i a n v i s i b i l i t y . Community members c o n t r i b u t e d t o t h e p r o j e c t by d o n a t i n g f u n d s , o f f e r i n g i n - k i n d s e r v i c e s , p u b l i c i z i n g t h e e x h i b i t and v o l u n t e e r i n g on A d v i s o r y Committees. We began t o o r g a n i z e , t o v i s u a l i z e , and t o j o i n hands as a team. We a t t e m p t e d t o r e a c h out t o i s o l a t e d i n d i v i d u a l s who were i n need of s o c i a l s u p p o r t n e t w o r k s . To many of us, b e i n g i n v o l v e d w i t h Leaving Silence meant a c c e p t i n g a fu n d a m e n t a l r e s p o n s i b i l i t y t o work f o r s o c i a l changes o t h e r t h a n t h o s e f o c u s e d s o l e l y on queer A s i a n v i s i b i l i t y . We want more t h a n queer A s i a n images, i n s t e a d we want t o f e e l t h e impact o f r e a c h i n g o ut t o p u b l i c a u d i e n c e s Queering the Pacific Northwest 91 f o r r a i s i n g awareness about queer A s i a n i s s u e s . The p r o j e c t b r o u g h t us t o g e t h e r as a community, and i t r e c r u i t e d us t o m o b i l i z e f o r f u t u r e p o l i t i c a l f i g h t s a g a i n s t d i s c r i m i n a t i o n and i n j u s t i c e , s u c h as d e m o n s t r a t i o n s a g a i n s t w e l f a r e r e f o r m and g e n t r i f i c a t i o n o f t h e S e a t t l e C h i n a t o w n / I n t e r n a t i o n a l D i s t r i c t . I n t h i s r e g a r d , o u r a t t e m p t t o seek s o c i a l j u s t i c e f o r queer A s i a n s owes much t o t h e women's movement, w h i c h , f o r decades, has f o u g h t t o l i b e r a t e women of a l l c l a s s e s , s e x u a l o r i e n t a t i o n s , and c o l o u r s . The Pedagogy o f a T r a v e l l i n g E x h i b i t O t h e r t h a n c r o s s i n g g e o g r a p h i c a l b o r d e r s and r e l o c a t i n g e x h i b i t s paces ( C a s e l l a 1999, 118), what does a t r a v e l l i n g e x h i b i t e n t a i l ? The t r a v e l l i n g a s p e c t o f Leaving Silence had deep s i g n i f i c a n c e f o r t h e a n a l y s i s o f r a c e , c l a s s , and gender i d e n t i t i e s . B e i n g d i a s p o r i c i n n a t u r e , t h i s e x h i b i t h i g h l i g h t e d t h e f a c t t h a t queer A s i a n s e x i s t e verywhere. B e i n g movable, Leaving Silence c o u l d c r o s s s t a t e / p r o v i n c i a l b o r d e r s and b r i n g i t s s u b j e c t m a t t e r t o l i m i t l e s s p u b l i c a r e n a s . As i t s p h y s i c a l and s o c i a l e n v i r o n m e n t s changed, i t was a b l e t o b r i n g i t s message t o d i f f e r e n t crowds and p o t e n t i a l l y open up v a r i o u s i n t e r p r e t a t i o n s o f what i t means t o be queer and A s i a n . As Carmen Luke (1996, 3) s u g g e s t s , "meaning i s n e v e r g u a r a n t e e d , f i x e d , o r u n p r o b l e m a t i c a l l y s h a r e d among s o c i a l a g e n t s . " Thus t h e im p a c t o f Leaving Silence c o u l d be as d i v e r s e as t h e communities i n w h i c h i t was d i s p l a y e d , and t h e r e a d i n g s o f t h e n a r r a t i v e s c o u l d be as complex as t h e c h a n g i n g l a n d s c a p e s . I n r e c o g n i z i n g t h e need f o r w i d e r p u b l i c e d u c a t i o n on t h e s u b j e c t o f queer A s i a n s , we s u b m i t t e d t h e e x h i b i t t o t h e p e o p l e a t E x h i b i t T o u r i n g S e r v i c e s (based a t E a s t e r n Washington U n i v e r s i t y ) i n o r d e r t o t a k e a dvantage o f t h e i r e x p e r t i s e i n s h o w c a s i n g e x h i b i t s a c r o s s t h e U n i t e d S t a t e s . We b e l i e v e t h a t t h e f a c t t h a t Leaving Silence was a community p r o j e c t made t h e j o i n t message o f a n t i - h o m o p h o b i a and a n t i -r a c i s m more e f f e c t i v e t h a n i t m ight o t h e r w i s e have been. T h i s i s because Queering the Pacific Northwest 92 t h e community n a t u r e o f t h e e x h i b i t e n s u r e d i t s wide r e c e p t i o n and, t h u s , an i n c r e a s e d awareness o f queer A s i a n s e x u a l i t i e s . Leaving Silence v i s i t e d d i f f e r e n t p u b l i c s i t e s and was r e c e i v e d by v a r i o u s a u d i e n c e s . I t was f i r s t d i s p l a y e d on t h e main f l o o r o f t h e downtown S e a t t l e P u b l i c L i b r a r y . We chose t h e l i b r a r y f o r o b v i o u s r e a s o n s : i t i s b o t h a c e n t r a l r e s o u r c e f o r t h o s e s e e k i n g knowledge and a p u b l i c g a t h e r i n g p l a c e . D i s p l a y e d on t h e l i b r a r y ' s main f l o o r , t h e e x h i b i t was p r o v i d e d w i t h a maximum degr e e o f v i s i b i l i t y . The f a c t t h a t t h e l i b r a r y ' s a d m i n i s t r a t i o n a c c e p t e d Leaving Silence f o r d i s p l a y s e r v e d t o l e g i t i m i z e queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s e x u a l i t y and t o e s t a b l i s h i t as v a l i d s u b j e c t m a t t e r . I n v i e w i n g Leaving Silence as a t r a v e l l i n g p i e c e o f d o c u m e n t a t i o n , I am a t t e m p t i n g t o i n v e s t i g a t e t h e p o t e n t i a l o f a t r a v e l l i n g pedagogy --a pedagogy t h a t c h a l l e n g e s f i x e d s i t e s ( f o r l e a r n i n g ) and s t a b l e meanings. Not o n l y d i d t h e p h y s i c a l e n v i r o n m e n t o f t h e d i s p l a y change, b u t so d i d t h e s i t e s o f s h a r i n g and l e a r n i n g . T h i s p o i n t s t o t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f c h a n g i n g c o n t e x t s and f l u i d r e a d i n g s w i t h r e g a r d t o u n d e r s t a n d i n g queer A s i a n (and, i n d e e d , any) l i v e s , f o r no l i f e i s s t a t i c . I n c o n c l u s i o n , t h e t r a v e l l i n g e x h i b i t f o r m a t o f Leaving Silence f a c i l i t a t e d d i s c u s s i o n s on t h e s u b j e c t o f b e i n g q ueer and A s i a n . T h i s community e d u c a t i o n a l p r o j e c t c h a l l e n g e s e d u c a t o r s t o c r e a t e forums w i t h i n w h i c h t o expose non-mainstream s u b j e c t m a t t e r and t o d e v e l o p a p e d a g o g i c a l p r a c t i c e t h a t w i l l r e s p o n s i b l y a d d r e s s i s s u e s p e r t a i n i n g t o s o c i a l j u s t i c e . Through i n c r e a s i n g queer A s i a n v i s i b i l i t y i n t h e p u b l i c r e a l m , we became aware o f t h e p o t e n t i a l o f t r a v e l l i n g pedagogy. Leaving Silence d e m o n s t r a t e s one p o s s i b l e method o f m o b i l i z i n g a g a i n s t o p p r e s s i v e / r e p r e s s i v e s o c i o - c u l t u r a l i n s t i t u t i o n s . Queering the Pacific Northwest 93 CHAPTER 6: CONCLUSION I l i k e t o t h i n k o f my work as c r e a t i n g a p r i v a t e c o n v e r s a t i o n w i t h each p e r s o n , no m a t t e r how p u b l i c each work i s and no m a t t e r how many p e o p l e a r e p r e s e n t . 2 4 Maya L i n Most o f a r c h i t e c t , s c u l p t o r and a r t i s t , Maya L i n ' s p u b l i c m e m o r i a l s and works c r e a t e p r i v a t e s p aces f o r r e f l e c t i o n and mourning i n o t h e r w i s e p u b l i c venues. L o c a t e d i n p u b l i c s i t e s , h e r works s y m b o l i z e h i s t o r i c a l moments and t h e p a s s a g e o f t i m e . A l t h o u g h t h e n a t u r e o f Leaving Silence: Queer Asian and P a c i f i c Islander Oral History Exhibit i s v e r y d i f f e r e n t from a p u b l i c m e m o r i a l , i t does engage v i e w e r s by c r e a t i n g an i n t e r n a l d i a l o g u e between them and t h e n a r r a t o r whose words appear on t h e e x h i b i t p a n e l . The e x h i b i t ' s o r g a n i z e r s , v o l u n t e e r s and n a r r a t o r s p r e s e n t a " p r i v a t e " t o p i c -- b e i n g queer and A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r -- t o p u b l i c a u d i e n c e s . T h i s t h e s i s r a i s e s t h e q u e s t i o n o f how t h e Leaving Silence e x h i b i t enhances o u r u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f qu e e r A s i a n A m e r i c a n l i v e s . I t a l s o a s k s how a queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s u b j e c t f i t s i n t o t h e w i d e r scheme o f pedagogy.. By documenting t h e e x h i b i t , t h i s t h e s i s s e e ks t o f i l l t h e v o i d i n queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n s c h o l a r s h i p and t o s e t t h e ground f o r f u r t h e r r e s e a r c h . T h i s work i s a r e s u l t o f a merger between community a c t i v i s m and academic s c h o l a r s h i p , and i t s e eks t o show t h a t community p r o j e c t s a r e s u b j e c t s w o r t h y o f academic s t u d y . Moreover, I c o n t e n d t h a t Leaving Silence f u n c t i o n s as an e d u c a t i o n a l t o o l t h a t e n a b l e s us t o f i g h t homophobia and, by e x t e n s i o n , v a r i o u s o t h e r forms o f o p p r e s s i o n . By b r i n g i n g n a r r a t i v e s and images t o p u b l i c a u d i e n c e s , t h e e x h i b i t showed not o n l y t h a t q ueer A s i a n A mericans e x i s t , b u t a l s o t h a t t h e i r e x p e r i e n c e s a r e v a l i d . I n b r i d g i n g t h e gap between community a c t i v i s m and academia, t h i s t h e s i s i l l u s t r a t e s t h e need f o r f u r t h e r s o c i a l a c t i v i s t r e s e a r c h . Queering the Pacific Northwest 94 As a c a s e s t u d y of an A s i a n A m e r i c a n community's e f f o r t s t o d i s p e l homophobia, t h i s t h e s i s makes a c o n t r i b u t i o n t o A s i a n A m e r i c a n s o c i a l j u s t i c e movements. I t p r o v i d e s one more r e s o u r c e t h a t e n a b l e s e d u c a t o r s and s t u d e n t s a l i k e t o l e a r n how a c r i t i c a l s o c i o - c u l t u r a l i s s u e can-b r i n g communities t o g e t h e r . And i t o f f e r s a model t h a t can be r e p l i c a t e d i n o t h e r c o m m u n i t i e s . I n my vi e w , one of t h e r e a s o n s t h a t Leaving Silence was so s u c c e s s f u l was t h a t i t i n v o l v e d t h e queer A s i a n A m e r i c a n community i n b o t h i t s p l a n n i n g and i m p l e m e n t a t i o n p r o c e s s e s . I t f o l l o w s t h a t t h e d o c u m e n t a t i o n o f t h e s e p r o c e s s e s w i l l h e l p p e o p l e i n o t h e r c ommunities t o p l a n t h e i r own e x h i b i t s and t o v o c a l i z e t h e i r own p o l i t i c a l i s s u e s . I n a n a l y z i n g t h e Leaving Silence e x h i b i t I was a b l e t o b r i n g t o l i g h t t h e r a c i a l i z e d , gendered, s o c i o - c u l t u r a l , and p o l i t i c a l a s p e c t s o f b e i n g q u e e r and A s i a n . U l t i m a t e l y , I hope t h a t t h i s work f u n c t i o n s as a means o f e n a b l i n g p e o p l e t o m o b i l i z e t h e i r c ommunities t o f i g h t homophobia and r a c i s m . T h i s t h e s i s i s b u i l t upon t h e c o n v i c t i o n t h a t i t i s p o s s i b l e t o promote s o c i a l change t h r o u g h e d u c a t i o n . I t i s meant t o r a i s e awareness o f queer A s i a n i s s u e s and t o emphasize t h e n e c e s s i t y of p r o m o t i n g a n t i - h o m o p h o b i a t h r o u g h e d u c a t i o n . The t h e s i s i s o r g a n i z e d i n t o f i v e c h a p t e r s . C h a p t e r 1, "Qu e e r i n g t h e P a c i f i c N o r t h w e s t , " t r a c e s t h e development o f t h e e x h i b i t , from t h e i n i t i a l r e c r u i t m e n t o f n a r r a t o r s t o i t s d i s p l a y i n p u b l i c s p a c e s . I n p r o v i d i n g t h i s b a c kground, I s p e c i f y t h e key i n d i v i d u a l s and p a r t n e r s h i p s t h a t c o n t r i b u t e d t o t h e p r o j e c t . A t t h e same t i m e , I r e c o g n i z e t h e l a c k o f r e p r e s e n t a t i o n from two com m u n i t i e s : t h e n a t i v e P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r community and t h e t r a n s g e n d e r e d community. I c a l l f o r more d i s c u s s i o n and p l a n n i n g i n f u t u r e community p r o j e c t s as w e l l as f o r renaming t h e e x h i b i t Leaving Silence: Queer Asian American Oral History Exhibit. The c h a p t e r ends by d e f i n i n g t h e e x h i b i t as a p o l i t i c a l e n t i t y . Maya Lin, Boundaries (New York: Simon & Schuster, 2000), 2:03. Queering the Pacific Northwest 95 I a l s o p o i n t o ut t h a t my i n v e s t m e n t i n queer A s i a n communities comes fr o m my own i d e n t i t y a s an A s i a n l e s b i a n . C h a p t e r 2, " L i t e r a t u r e Review," r e v i e w s t h e l i t e r a t u r e on queer A s i a n s e x u a l i d e n t i t i e s and s u g g e s t s an i n t e r d i s c i p l i n a r y a p p r o a c h t o t h i s i s s u e . L o o k i n g a t A s i a n A m e r i c a n movements, f e m i n i s t s and gay l i b e r a t i o n w i t h i n a N o r t h A m e r i c a n c o n t e x t , I show how v a r i o u s a c t i v i s t s d i s c u s s gender i d e n t i t i e s , s e x u a l i t y , and c l a s s d i v i s i o n s . Drawing from p o e t r y , p r o s e , n o v e l s , and e s s a y s i n queer A s i a n a n t h o l o g i e s and f e m i n i s t w r i t i n g s , I p r e s e n t a complex v i e w o f same-sex d e s i r e and i t s s o c i a l and p o l i t i c a l consequences. I n d i s c u s s i n g f e m i n i s t r e s e a r c h m e t h o d o l o g i e s , I show how s o c i a l a c t i v i s m can be i n t e g r a t e d w i t h i n academic t r a d i t i o n s . U s i n g Carmen Luke's p u b l i c p e d a g o g i c a l framework, I de m o n s t r a t e Leaving Silence's p o t e n t i a l f o r c o n t r i b u t i n g t o p r o g r e s s i v e e d u c a t i o n w i t h i n n o n - t r a d i t i o n a l s i t e s . C h a p t e r 3, "Methods and P r o c e d u r e s , " o f f e r s a t h o r o u g h i n v e s t i g a t i o n o f my r o l e as p r o j e c t c o o r d i n a t o r / a r e s e a r c h e r as w e l l as a s t e p - b y - s t e p d e s c r i p t i o n o f t h e p r o c e s s i n v o l v e d i n p u t t i n g t h e e x h i b i t t o g e t h e r . I t i s my hope t h a t t h i s d e t a i l e d d e s c r i p t i o n w i l l be of b e n e f i t t o o t h e r community a c t i v i s t s who may w i s h t o engage i n s i m i l a r r e s e a r c h and v i s i b i l i t y campaigns. C h a p t e r 4, " D i f f e r e n c e s w i t h Queer A s i a n I d e n t i t y : N a r r a t i v e s and Images of I d e n t i t y - m a k i n g , " d i s c u s s e s t h e e x h i b i t ' s f o u r r e c u r r i n g themes: (1) g e n e r a t i o n a l d i f f e r e n c e s w i t h r e g a r d t o t h e use of t h e word "queer," (2) t h e r e l a t i o n s h i p between achievement and f a m i l y a c c e p t a n c e , (3) b e i n g i n - b e t w e e n , and (4) r e l i g i o n . I n a t t e m p t i n g t o a d d r e s s why t h e s e p a r t i c u l a r t o p i c s c o n t i n u a l l y r e s u r f a c e d i n t h e i n t e r v i e w s , I p r o v i d e q u o t e s from t h e t r a n s c r i p t s as w e l l as from r e l a t e d l i t e r a t u r e . I d i s c u s s how t h e c o n t e n t s o f t h e n a r r a t i v e s , t h e b l a c k - a n d - w h i t e p h o t o g r a p h s , and t h e p u b l i c n a t u r e o f t h e e x h i b i t combined t o r e s u l t i n an a u t o m a t i c " o u t i n g " o f t h e n a r r a t o r s and a c o n c o m i t a n t c o n c e r n f o r t h e i r s a f e t y . I a l s o p o i n t o ut t h a t , r a t h e r t h a n s e e i n g t h e t h i r t e e n Queering the Pacific Northwest 96 n a r r a t i v e s and t h i r t y - f o u r photographs as being d e f i n i t i v e of queer Asian l i v e s , they should be seen as snapshots and sound b i t e s . In other words, they o f f e r the merest glimpse i n t o a complex and s i l e n c e d community. Chapter 5, "The Pedagogy of a T r a v e l l i n g E x h i b i t , " focuses p r i m a r i l y upon the i s s u e of how p u b l i c educational pedagogies that take place w i t h i n n o n - t r a d i t i o n a l s i t e s can r a i s e p o l i t i c a l awareness of s o c i a l i s s u e s . Feminist pedagogues r i g h t l y view themselves as attempting to f a c i l i t a t e dialogues around t o p i c s that are subject to controversy. Leaving Silence f i t s i n t o t h i s mould, f o r i t f u n c t i o n s to provide p u b l i c audiences w i t h i n f o r m a t i o n on what being queer and Asian means to d i f f e r e n t people. The e x h i b i t has the p o t e n t i a l to a s s i s t any viewer i n t e r e s t e d i n understanding queer Asian l i v e s . In c r e a t i n g a l i n k between a v i s i b i l i t y campaign and an educational moment, Leaving Silence d i s p l a y s the p o t e n t i a l to a i d i n s o c i a l transformation. I t a l s o shows the m u l t i p l e i n t e r s e c t i o n s of racism, sexism, homophobia, and cl a s s i s m , thus o f f e r i n g the p o t e n t i a l to engage i n a more in-depth a n a l y s i s of the place of such e x h i b i t s w i t h i n educational research. In a d d i t i o n , I contend that Leaving Silence f u n c t i o n s as a form of t r a v e l l i n g pedagogy - a pedagogy that challenges f i x e d s i t e s ( f o r learning) and s t a b l e meanings. In contemplating f u t u r e research options, I would suggest l o o k i n g at the boundaries crossed by queer Asians and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r s i n the process of coming out. During the c o o r d i n a t i o n and the w r i t i n g of t h i s p r o j e c t , .1 came to r e a l i z e how coming out d i f f e r s w i t h i n d i f f e r e n t geographical and s o c i a l contexts. For example, to Asian Americans the notion of "coming out" means something d i f f e r e n t , depending on whether they are immigrants, refugees, or f i r s t generation A s i a n Americans. Family t i e s and h i s t o r i e s o f t e n p l a y v a r i o u s r o l e s i n whether or not one decides to be out as a queer person. How does t h i s a f f e c t the a b i l i t y to come out? While the language of governmental census r i g i d l y c a t e g o r i z e Queering the Pacific Northwest 97 r a c i a l i d e n t i t i e s , t h e coming out e x p e r i e n c e s o f A s i a n s and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r s a r e as d i v e r s e as a r e t h e c u l t u r e s t h e m s e l v e s . How does coming out t r a n s l a t e i n t o d i v e r s i f i e d s o c i a l and c u l t u r a l c o n t e x t s ? What does i t mean when a queer p e r s o n comes out by c r o s s i n g n a t i o n a l b o r d e r s (e.g., by e m i g r a t i n g from a p r e d o m i n a n t l y A s i a n c o u n t r y t o a N o r t h A m e r i c a n c o u n t r y ) ? A n o t h e r a r e a o f r e s e a r c h would e n t a i l e x p l o r i n g how we can i n c l u d e queer p e r s p e c t i v e s i n h i g h s c h o o l c u r r i c u l a . I had t h e chance t o i n t e r v i e w T i n o U m a l i , a gay y o u t h a c t i v i s t , f o r t h e Leaving Silence p r o j e c t . I met T i n o once a g a i n , when he was s i x t e e n , and h i s n a r r a t i v e a p p e a r e d on t h e e x h i b i t p a n e l . Four and a h a l f y e a r s l a t e r , I r e t u r n e d t o S e a t t l e , Washington, f o r a queer A s i a n and P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r c o n f e r e n c e ( L o t u s Roots 4). A t t h e age of twenty, he rema i n s i n t h e f o r e f r o n t o f queer y o u t h a c t i v i s m . T i n o ' s p r e s e n c e a t t h e c o n f e r e n c e h e l d deep meaning f o r me. I t d e m o n s t r a t e d t h e i m p o r t a n c e o f s u p p o r t i n g q u eer y o u t h i n t h e i r a c t i v i s t work by p r o v i d i n g them w i t h an i n c l u s i v e h i g h s c h o o l c u r r i c u l u m . I n h i s i n t e r v i e w , T i n o acknowledged t h e p e e r s u p p o r t t h a t he r e c e i v e d from h i s c l a s s m a t e s , b u t he a l s o v o c a l i z e d t h e l a c k o f s u p p o r t f r o m s c h o o l a d m i n i s t r a t i o n . I have no doubt t h a t t h e o f f i c i a l i n c l u s i o n o f queer p e r s p e c t i v e s i n h i g h s c h o o l c u r r i c u l a would e n a b l e s t u d e n t s , p a r e n t s , t e a c h e r s , a d m i n i s t r a t o r s , s c h o o l c o u n s e l o r s , and p r i n c i p a l s t o be more aware of queer y o u t h i s s u e s . A l t h o u g h I a p p l a u d t h e e s t a b l i s h m e n t o f g a y - s t r a i g h t a l l i a n c e s i n some US h i g h s c h o o l s , I cannot o v e r - e m p h a s i z e t h e need f o r queer i n c l u s i v e i s s u e s t o form p a r t o f c l a s s r o o m d i s c u s s i o n s , t e x t b o o k s , and l i b r a r y m a t e r i a l s . One might b e g i n t o a p p r o a c h suc h i s s u e s t h r o u g h a d i s c u s s i o n o f gender i d e n t i t y . I hope t h a t , by p o s i n g t h e s e and s i m i l a r t o p i c s as f u t u r e r e s e a r c h o p t i o n s , ' p e d a g o g y can b e g i n t o t a k e q u e e r n e s s (and i t s many i m p l i c a t i o n s ) f a r more s e r i o u s l y t h a n i t does a t t h e moment. I b e l i e v e i n t h e p o t e n t i a l o f s o c i a l change t h r o u g h e d u c a t i o n . I p e r c e i v e p u b l i c Queering the Pacific Northwest 98 e d u c a t i o n t o be a c h a n n e l t h r o u g h w h i c h t o a d d r e s s s o c i a l and p o l i t i c a l i s s u e s c o n c e r n i n g how knowledge i s p r o d u c e d and how s e x u a l i d e n t i t i e s a r e c o n s t r u c t e d . I n i d e n t i f y i n g w i t h t h e t e n e t s of f e m i n i s t e d u c a t i o n , I a l s o see t h e m e a n i n g f u l r o l e t h a t e d u c a t o r s can p l a y i n f a c i l i t a t i n g d i a l o g u e s -- d i a l o g u e s t h a t c o n t r i b u t e t o an i n c r e a s e d p u b l i c u n d e r s t a n d i n g o f what might seem t o be c o n t r o v e r s i a l and h i g h l y c o n t e s t e d s u b j e c t s . A p r o g r e s s i v e e d u c a t o r can c h a l l e n g e t h e n o r m a t i v i t y o f e d u c a t i o n a l p r a c t i c e s and a d d r e s s u n p o p u l a r i s s u e s w i t h i n v a r i o u s l e a r n i n g s p a c e s . As Luke s u g g e s t s , l e a r n i n g and t e a c h i n g can t a k e p l a c e i n r a r e moments and w i t h i n u n u s u a l s i t e s . I n d i s c u s s i n g and d e b a t i n g c o n t e n t i o u s p o l i t i c a l and s o c i a l i s s u e s , a r e s p o n s i b l e e d u c a t o r can engage p a s s i o n a t e l y w i t h h e r s t u d e n t s . E d u c a t i o n , i n o t h e r words, has t h e c a p a c i t y (and, hence, e d u c a t o r s have t h e r e s p o n s i b i l i t y ) t o i n f o r m p u b l i c o p i n i o n and t o shape p u b l i c c o n s c i o u s n e s s . Queering the Pacific Northwest 99 BIBLIOGRAPHY: A c k e r , J o a n , K a t e B a r r y and Johanna E s s e v e l d . " O b j e c t i v i t y and T r u t h : Problems i n Do i n g F e m i n i s t R e s e a r c h . " Women's Studies Int. Forum, V o l . 6 No.4, 1983, 423-435. A g u i l a r - S a n Juan, K a r i n , ed. The State of Asian America: Activism and Resistance in the 1990s. B o s t o n : South End P r e s s , 1994. A l e x a n d e r , M. J a c q u i and Chandra T a l p a d e Mohanty, ed. Feminist Genealogies, Colonial Legacies, Democratic Futures. New Y o r k : R o u t l e d g e , 1997. A l b r e c h t , L i s a and Rose M. Brewer, ed. Bridges of Power: Women's M u l t i c u l t u r a l A l l i a n c e s . P h i l a d e l p h i a : New S o c i e t y P u b l i s h e r s , 1990. A l c o f f , L i n d a . "The Prob l e m o f S p e a k i n g f o r O t h e r s . " Cultural C r i t i q u e , No. 20 ( W i n t e r 1991-92), 1991, 5-32. Ang, I e n . L i v i n g Room Wars: Rethinking Media Audiences for a Postmodern World. London: R o u t l e d g e , 1996. A n z a l d u a , G l o r i a , ed. Making Face, Making Soul Haciendo Caras: Creative and C r i t i c a l Perspectives by Women of Color. San F r a n c i s c o : Aunt L u t e F o u n d a t i o n Books, 1990. , " B r i d g e , D r a w b r i d g e , Sandbar o r I s l a n d L e s b i a n s - o f - C o l o r H a c i e n d a A l i a n z a s . " Bridges of Power: Women's M u l t i c u l t u r a l A l l i a n c e s . Ed. L i s a A l b r e c h t and Rose M. Brewer. P h i l a d e l p h i a : New S o c i e t y P u b l i s h e r s , 1990, 216-231. B a n n e r j i , H i m a n i , ed. Returning the Gaze: Essays on Racism, Feminism and P o l i t i c s . Toronto:' S i s t e r V i s i o n P r e s s , 1993. , Thinking Through: Essays on Feminism, Marxism, and Anti-Racism. T o r o n t o : Women's P r e s s , 1995. Barman, J e a n , and M a r i e B a t t i s t e . F i r s t Nations Education in Canada: The C i r c l e Unfolds. Vancouver: U n i v e r s i t y o f B r i t i s h C o l u m b i a P r e s s , 1995 . B a r r y , J u d i t h . Public Fantasy. London: I n s t i t u t e o f Contemporary A r t s , 1991. B a t a c h a r y a , S h e i l a . " I n a Complex Weave." Resist! Essays Against a Homophobic Culture. Ed. Mona Oikawa, Dionne F a l c o n e r and Ann D e c t e r . T o r o n t o : Women's P r e s s , 1994, 179-185. Bhabha, Homi K. The Location of Culture. London: R o u t l e d g e , 1994. Brand, Dionne. Bread out of Stone. T o r o n t o : Coach House P r e s s , 1994. Brand, Dionne. Land To Light On. T o r o n t o : M c C l e l l a n d and S t e w a r t I n c . , 1997 . B r a n t , B e t h . I ' l l Sing 'Til The Day I Die: Conversations with Tyendinaga Elders. T o r o n t o : M c G i l l i g a n Books, 1995. B r i t z m a n , Deborah P. "What I s T h i s T h i n g C a l l e d L o v e ? ; New D i s c o u r s e s f o r U n d e r s t a n d i n g Gay and L e s b i a n Y o u t h . " Radical In<ter>ventions: Identity, P o l i t i c s , and Difference/s In Educational Praxis. Ed. Suzanne De C a s t e l l and Mary B r y s o n . A l b a n y : S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y o f New Yo r k P r e s s , 1997, 183-207. B r i t z m a n , Deborah P. Lost Subjects, Contested Objects: Toward a Psychoanalytic Inquiry of Learning. A l b a n y : S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y o f New York P r e s s , 1998. C a s e l l a , R o n n i e . "What a r e we d o i n g when we a r e 'd o i n g ' c u l t u r a l s t u d i e s i n e d u c a t i o n - and why?" Educational Theory, V o l . 48 N o . l , 1999, 107-123 . Chen, Kuan-Hsing, ed. T r a j e c t o r i e s : Inter-Asia Cultural Studies. London: R o u t l e d g e , 1998. Chow, Rey. Ethics after Idealism: Theory-Culture-Ethnicity-Reading. I n d i a n a p o l i s : I n d i a n a U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1998. Queering the Pacific Northwest 100 , P r i m i t i v e Passions: V i s u a l i t y , Sexuality, Ethnography, and Contemporary Chinese Cinema. New York : C o l u m b i a U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1995 . D a v i s , A n g e l a . Women, Race, and Class. New York : Random House, 1981. D h a l i w a l , S a r i n d a r . " S h a n i Mootoo: S h i f t i n g P e r c e p t i o n , Changing P r a c t i c e s . " FUSE Magazine, V o l . 2 2 No.2, 1999, 18-27. De C a s t e l l , Suzanne and Mary B r y s o n . "Queer Pedagogy?!: P r a x i s Makes I m / P e r f e c t " Radical In<ter>ventions: Identity, P o l i t i c s , and Difference/s In Educational Praxis. Ed. Suzanne C a s t e l l and Mary B r y s o n . A l b a n y : S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y o f New Yor k P r e s s , 1997, 269-293. Donald, James and A l i R a t t a n s i , ed. 'Race', Culture and Difference. London: SAGE P u b l i c a t i o n s L t d . , 1992. Dui n , S t e v e . "We've l e f t s i l e n c e i n t h e d u s t . " The Sunday Oregonian, May 18 1997, p p . D l . Eng, D a v i d L. and A l i c e Y. Horn, ed. Queer in Asian America. P h i l a d e l p h i a : Temple U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1998. E s p i r i t u , Yen Le. Asian American Women and Men. Thousand Oaks: SAGE P u b l i c a t i o n s , 1997. Ey r e , L i n d a . "Compulsory H e t e r o s e x u a l i t y i n a U n i v e r s i t y C l a s s r o o m . " Radical In<ter>ventions: Identity, P o l i t i c s , and Difference/s In Educational Praxis. Ed. Suzanne De C a s t e l l and Mary B r y s o n . A l b a n y : S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y o f New Yor k P r e s s , 1997, 233-246. F i n e , M i c h e l l e , L o i s Weis, L i n d a C. P o w e l l and L. Mun Wong, ed. Off White: Readings on Race, Power and Society. New Yo r k : R o u t l e d g e , 1997 . Fonow, Mary M a r g a r e t and J u d i t h A. Cook, ed. Beyond Methodology: Feminist Scholarship as Lived Research. I n d i a n a p o l i s : I n d i a n a U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1991. Fung, R i c h a r d . " L o o k i n g f o r My P e n i s : The E r o t i c i z e d A s i a n i n Gay V i d e o P o r n . " How Do I Look? Queer Film and Video, ed. Bad- O b j e c t C h o i c e s . S e a t t l e : Bay P r e s s , 1991, 145-160. Gay A s i a n s T o r o n t o . CelebrAsian: Shared Lives: An Oral History of Gay Asians. T o r o n t o : Gay A s i a n T o r o n t o , 1996. G i t l i n , Andrew, ed. Power and Method: P o l i t i c a l Activism and Educational Research. New York : R o u t l e d g e , 1994. Gl u c k , Sherna B e r g e r and Daphne P a t a i , ed. Women's Words: The Feminist Practice of Oral History. New Yo r k : R o u t l e d g e , 1991. G r i e p , L e s l i e . " S t e p p i n ' Out: A P u b l i c Response." J u s t Out, June 1997, p.3. Gunew, S n e j a , and Anna Yeatman, ed. Feminism and the P o l i t i c s of Difference. H a l i f a x : Fernwood P u b l i s h i n g , 1993. H a l l , S t u a r t , ed. . R e p r e s e n t a t i o n : Cultural Representations and S i g n i f y i n g Practices. Thousand Oaks: SAGE P u b l i c a t i o n s , 1997. Ho, F r e d , C a r o l y n A n t o n i o , D i a n e F u j i n o and S t e v e Y i p , ed. Legacy to Liberation: P o l i t i c s and Culture of Revolutionary Asian P a c i f i c America. San F r a n c i s c o : AK P r e s s , 2000. Horn, A l i c e Y. " I n t h e M i n d o f An/Other." Sharon L i m - H i n g , ed. The Very Inside: An Anthology of Writing by Asian and P a c i f i c Islander Lesbian and Bisexual Women. T o r o n t o : S i s t e r V i s i o n P r e s s , 1994, 272-275 . Hooks, b e l l , remembered rapture: the writer at work. New York : Henry H o l t and Company, 1999. , Feminist Theory: from margin to center. B o s t o n : South End P r e s s , 1984. , Teaching to Transgress: Education as the Practice of Freedom. New Y o r k : R o u t l e d g e , 1994. Queering the Pacific Northwest 101 Hutnyk, John, Ashwani Sharma and S a n j a y Sharma, ed. Dis-Orienting Rhythms: The P o l i t i c s of the New Asian Dance Music. London: Zed Books, 1996. H y t t e n , K a t h y . "The P r o m i s e of C u l t u r a l S t u d i e s of E d u c a t i o n . " Educational Theory, V o l . 4 9 No.4, 1999, 527-543. Iba n e z , F r a n c i s c o . "From C o n f e s s i o n t o D i a l o g u e . " Radical In<ter>ventions: Identity, P o l i t i c s , and Difference/s In Educational Praxis. Ed. Suzanne De C a s t e l l and Mary B r y s o n . A l b a n y : S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y o f New Y o r k P r e s s , 1997, 107-130. J a g g a r , A l i s o n M. Feminist P o l i t i c s & Human Nature. London: Rowman & L i t t l e f i e l d P u b l i s h e r s , I n c . , 1983. K a u a n u i , J . K e h a u l a n i and J u H u i "Judy" Han. " ' A s i a n P a c i f i c I s l a n d e r ' : I s s u e s of R e p r e s e n t a t i o n and R e s p o n s i b i l i t y . Sharon L i m - H i n g , ed. The Very Inside: An Anthology of Writing by Asian and P a c i f i c Islander Lesbian and Bisexual Women. T o r o n t o : S i s t e r V i s i o n P r e s s , 1994, 376-379. Kim, E l a i n e H, L i l i a V. V i l l a n e u v a and A s i a n Women U n i t e d of C a l i f o r n i a , ed. Making More Waves: New Writing by Asian American Women. B o s t o n : Beacon P r e s s , 1997. Koh, K a r l y n . " I d e n t i t y on R e f l e c t i o n . " FRONT Magazine, Jan./Feb., 1997. , "Yours T r u l y . " West Coast Line, 24, 1998, 23-27. K o p p e l , Tom. Kanaka: The Untold Story of Hawaiian Pioneers in B r i t i s h Columbia and the P a c i f i c Northwest. Vancouver: w h i t e c a p Books, 1995 . Kumar, A m i t a v a . Passport Photos. B e r k e l e y : U n i v e r s i t y of C a l i f o r n i a P r e s s , 2000. Laiwan. Distance of d i s t i n c t vision/point eloigne de v i s i o n c l a i r e . Vancouver: Western F r o n t , 1992. L a i , L a r i s s a . When Fox i s a Thousand. Vancouver: P r e s s Gang P u b l i s h e r s , 1995 . L a t h e r , P a t t i . " R e s e a r c h as P r a x i s . " Harvard Educational Review, V o l . 5 6 No.3, 1996, 257-277. Lee, A l l y s o n C. and Makeda S i l v e r a , ed. Pearls of Passion: A Treasury of Lesbian E r o t i c a . T o r o n t o : S i s t e r V i s i o n P r e s s , 1995. Lee, B e n n e t t and J i m Wong-Chu, ed. Many-Mouthed Birds: Contemporary Writing by Chinese Canadians. Vancouver: Douglas and M c l n t y r e , 1991. Lee, Sky. Disappearing Moon Cafe. S e a t t l e : S e a l P r e s s , 1990. Leong, R u s s e l l , ed. Asian American S e x u a l i t i e s : Dimensions of the Gay and Lesbian Experience. New Y o r k : R o u t l e d g e , 1996. l e u n g , man c h u i . Community Development Report, Facing Out Together: A Support Pamphlet for East and Southeast Asian Lesbians, Gays and Bisexuals and t h e i r Families and Friends. Vancouver: A s i a n S o c i e t y f o r t h e I n t e r v e n t i o n of AIDS, 1996. Lim, L e r o y You-Leng. "Webs o f B e t r a y a l , Webs o f B l e s s i n g s . " Queer in Asian America. Ed. D a v i d L. Eng and A l i c e Y. Horn. P h i l a d e l p h i a : Temple U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1998, 323-334. Lim - H i n g , S h i r l e y , ed. The Very Inside: An Anthology of Writing by Asian and P a c i f i c Islander Lesbian and Bisexual Women. T o r o n t o : S i s t e r V i s i o n P r e s s , 1994. L i n , Maya. Boundaries. New Y o r k : Simon & S c h u s t e r , 2000. L o r d e , Audre. "The M a s t e r ' s T o o l s W i l l Never D i s m a n t l e t h e M a s t e r ' s House." This Bridge Called My Back: Writings by Radical Women of Color, ed. C h e r r i e Moraga and G l o r i a A n z a l d u a . Watertown, Mass.: Persephone, 1981. Lowe, L i s a . Immigrant Acts. Durham: Duke U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1996. Luke, Carmen, ed. Feminisms and Pedagogies of Everyday L i f e . A l b a n y : S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y of New Y o r k P r e s s , 1996. Queering the Pacific Northwest 102 M a c l e a r , Kyo. "Not i n So Many Words: T r a n s l a t i n g S i l e n c e a c r o s s ' D i f f e r e n c e ' " . Fireweed, 44/45, 1994, 6-11. Mathur, Ashok. "The D e s i s t i n g Reader." West Coast Line, 10, 1993, 67-73. M i k i , Roy. Broken Entries: Race, S u b j e c t i v i t y and Writing. T o r o n t o : The Me r c u r y P r e s s , 1998. Mohanty, Chandra T a l p a d e . "On Race and V o i c e : C h a l l e n g e s f o r L i b e r a l E d u c a t i o n i n t h e 1990s." Cultural C r i t i q u e ( W i n t e r 1989-1990), 179-208. Mootoo, S h a n i . Cereus Blooms At Night. Vancouver: P r e s s Gang P u b l i s h e r s , 1996. Ng, Roxana. "A Woman Out o f C o n t r o l : D e c o n s t r u c t i n g S e x i s m and Racism i n th e U n i v e r s i t y . " Radical In<ter>ventions: Identity, P o l i t i c s , and Difference/s In Educational Praxis. Ed. Suzanne De C a s t e l l and Mary B r y s o n . A l b a n y : S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y o f New Y o r k P r e s s , 1997, 39-58. Oikawa, Mona, Dionne F a l c o n e r and Ann D e c t e r , ed. Resist! Essays Against a Homophobic Culture. T o r o n t o : Women's P r e s s , 1994. Oikawa, Mona, Dionne F a l c o n e r , Rosamund E l w i n and Ann D e c t e r , ed. Outrage: Dykes and Bis Resist Homophobia. T o r o n t o : Women's P r e s s , 1993 . O k i h i r o , Gary Y. Margins and Mainstreams. S e a t t l e : U n i v e r s i t y o f Washington P r e s s , 1994. Palumb o - L i u , D a v i d . Asian/American: H i s t o r i c a l Crossings of a Racial Frontier. S t a n f o r d : S t a n f o r d U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1999. Parmar, P r a t i b h a . "That Moment of Emergence." Queer Looks: Perspectives on Lesbian and Gay Film and Video. Ed. M a r t h a Gever, John G r e y s o n and P r a t i b h a Parma. T o r o n t o : Between t h e L i n e s , 1993. Pegues, J u l i a n a . " S t r a t e g i e s f r o m t h e F i e l d : O r g a n i z i n g t h e A s i a n A m e r i c a n F e m i n i s t Movement." Dragon Ladies: Asian American Feminists Breathe F i r e . Ed. S o n i a Shah. B o s t o n : South End P r e s s , 1997, 3-16. P e r k i n s , Charmaine. "Any More C o l o u r f u l We'd Have t o Censor I t . " Radical In<ter>ventions: Identity, P o l i t i c s , and Difference/s In Educational Praxis. Ed. Suzanne C a s t e l l and Mary B r y s o n . A l b a n y : S t a t e U n i v e r s i t y o f New Y o r k P r e s s , 1997, 247-268. R e i n h e r t z , S h u l a m i t . Feminist Methods in Social Research. New York : O x f o r d U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1992. Roman, L e s l i e G., L i n d a K. C h r i s t i a n - S m i t h w i t h E l i z a b e t h E l l s w o r t h , ed. Becoming Feminine: The P o l i t i c s of Popular Culture. Sussex: F a l m e r P r e s s , 1988. Roman, L e s l i e G. "On t h e Ground w i t h A n t i - r a c i s t Pedagogy and Raymond W i l l i a m s ' s U n f i n i s h e d P r o j e c t t o A r t i c u l a t e a S o c i a l l y T r a n s f o r m a t i v e C r i t i c a l R e a l i s m . " Views Beyond the Border Country: Raymond Williams and Cultural P o l i t i c s . Ed. Dennis D w o r k i n and L e s l i e G. Roman. New Y o r k : R o u t l e d g e , 1993. Roman, L e s l i e G. and L i n d a E y r e , ed. Dangerous Territories.- Struggles for Difference and Equality in Education. New York : R o u t l e d g e , 1997 . Ross, B e c k i . "A L e s b i a n P o l i t i c s o f E r o t i c D e c o l o n i z a t i o n . " Painting the Maple: Essays on Race, Gender, and the Construction of Canada. Ed. V e r o n i c a S trong-Boag, S h e r r i l l Grace, A v i g a i l E i s e n b e r g and Joan Anderson. Vancouver: U n i v e r s i t y o f B r i t i s h C o l u m b i a P r e s s , 1998. Sang, Deborah T z e - l a n . "Feminism's Double: L e s b i a n A c t i v i s m i n t h e M e d i a t e d P u b l i c Sphere i n Taiwan." Spaces of Their Own: Women's Public Sphere in Transnational China. Ed. M a y f a i r M e i - H u i Yang. M i n n e a p o l i s : U n i v e r s i t y o f M i n n e s o t a P r e s s , 1999, 132-161. Shan, Nayan. " S e x u a l i t y , I d e n t i t y , and t h e Uses o f H i s t o r y . " Queer in Asian America. Ed. D a v i d L. Eng and A l i c e Y. Horn. P h i l a d e l p h i a : Temple U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1998, 141-156. Queering the Pacific Northwest 103 Shah, S o n i a , ed. Dragon Ladies: Asian American Feminists Breathe F i r e . B o s t o n : South End P r e s s , 1997^ S i l v e r a , Makeda, ed. P i e c e of my Heart: A Lesbian of Colour Anthology. T o r o n t o : S i s t e r V i s i o n P r e s s , 1991. , Silenced: Talks with working class Carribean women about t h e i r l i v e s and struggles as Domestic Workers in Canada. T o r o n t o : S i s t e r V i s i o n P r e s s , 1983. Smyth, C h e r r y . Lesbians Talk Queer Notions. London: S c a r l e t P r e s s , 1992. S p i v a k , G a y a t r i C h a k r a v o r t y . Outside in the Teaching Machine. New York : R o u t l e d g e , 1993. S t a n l e y , L i z and Sue Wise. " F e m i n i s t R e s e a r c h , F e m i n i s t C o n s c i o u s n e s s , and E x p e r i e n c e s o f Sexism." Beyond Methodology: Feminist Scholarship as Lived Research. Ed. Mary M a r g a r e t Fonow and J u d i t h A. Cook. I n d i a n a p o l i s : I n d i a n a U n i v e r s i t y P r e s s , 1991. S r i v a s t a v a , A runa. " W i e l d i n g Words." West Coast Line, 10, 1993, 46-51. , " A n t i - R a c i s m I n s i d e and O u t s i d e t h e C l a s s r o o m . " Dangerous T e r r i t o r i e s : Struggles for Difference and Equality in Education. Ed. L e s l i e G. Roman and L i n d a E y r e . New York : R o u t l e d g e , 1997. T a k a g i , Dana Y. "Maiden Voyage: E x c u r s i o n i n t o S e x u a l i t y and I d e n t i t y P o l i t i c s i n A s i a n A m e r i c a . " Making More Waves: New Writing by Asian American Women. Ed. E l a i n e H. Kim, L i l i a V. V i l l a n e u v a and A s i a n Women U n i t e d o f C a l i f o r n i a . B o s t o n : Beacon P r e s s , 1997. T r a s k , Haunani-Kay. From a Native Daughter: Colonialism and Sovereignty in Hawai 'i. Monroe: Common Courage P r e s s , 1993. T r u j i l l o , C a r l a , ed. Chicana Lesbians. B e r k e l e y : T h i r d Women P r e s s , 1991. Vaz, Kim M a r i e , ed. Oral Narrative Research with Black Women. Thousand Oaks: SAGE P u b l i c a t i o n s , 1997. Wong, R i t a , monkeypuzzle. Vancouver: P r e s s Gang P u b l i s h e r s , 1998. Queering the Pacific Northwest 104 APPENDIX A Queering the Pacific Northwest 105 Queer Ayuwvc} API GrcCbHistory ^y}uhiticm/ Seattle/, Wa^hCngton/ A2reement for Volunteer Interviewer The "goal of the project is to promote the visibility and understanding of gays, lesbians and bisexuals within the Asian and Pacific Islander communities. A travelling exhibit composed of interviews and photographs of API gays, lesbians and bisexuals and their family members will help to bring a personal glimpse into the lives of these community members. The exhibit will be unveiled on National Coming Out Month, October 1996 and will travel throughout the region at high schools, universities, community centers, museums and galleries. Upon signing this form, I agree to the following conditions set forth by the Project Coordinator. Public use of my name in affiliation with the Exhibit in order to meet its goal to promote the visibility and understanding of gays, lesbians and bisexuals within the API communities. • Adhere to all notions of confidentiality including: disclosed information in interviews and modes of communication (phone conversations and notes), and an individual's sexual orientation or health status known through my involvement with the Exhibit unless permission is given by the individual. • All tapes, written notes and transcripts should be returned to the Project Coordinator as soon as possible. The Advisory Committee shall determine the ownership of these written documents. • Any complaints resulting from my interview(s) with interview subject(s) would be notified by the Project Coordinator for my knowledge. The Project Coordinator will meet with both parties regarding the allegations) but she will not assume responsibility for seeking solutions unless it is deemed destructive to the Exhibit itself. • Any complaints from me would be taken seriously by the Project Coordinator with utmost confidentiality unless personal permission is given for public knowledge. For complaints in regards to the Project Coordinator herself, 1 should have access to Advisory Committee members and hence seek their advice for appropriate action(s). • Be available for clarifications of written transcripts or the interviewing process. • If my interview is selected for the Exhibit, I shall have the written transcript typed up and handed in to the Project Coordinator within 14 days or less. • Be respectful at all times to the interviewee(s)/interview subject(s). • I shall seriously consider any kind of relationship beyond the professional relationship between an interviewer and an interviewee/interview subject. The Project Coordinator is not responsible for any personal conflicts resulting from both parties' voluntary participation in the Exhibit. Signature D a t e Name in Print Queering the Pacific Northwest 106 APPENDIX B Queering the Pacific Northwest 107 L is t of Working Advisory Committee Members and an edited version of Committee Biographies submitted by members themselves Max Chan Max is still In search of the ultimate gastronomical orgasm to her catering company, Foreign Affairs. Judith A. Chen Judy Chen seeks to create community capacity for social change through education, leadership development and building on our strengths. She co-founded an API domestic violence community organizing agency and an API lesbian/gay/bisexual anti-homophobia project. Anne Xuan Clark Anne Xuan Clark is a Vietnamese Irish lesbian film and video artist working in Seattle's International District. By day, she is the Campaign Manager for the International District Village Square. In her spare time, she co-founded Seattle's Asian Lesbian and Bisexual All iance. Vinh Do My interests lie in conflicts and communication. I'd like to study how these two things interact within cultures and how they play out inter-culturally. My work has been in journalism, in social work, and in activism. Thomas Gamble Thorn has lived n the Puget Sound region since he was a child and has worked to promote community development/activism for the last 8 years. Always evolving, changing and moving through identities; he has found strength and community working against the scourge of HIV/AIDS through the development of a vibrant queer Asian community. R o n Ho Ron Ho has spent over 34 years as an art educator, 32 of these with the Bel levue Public Schools. He was given awards as the "Elementary Art Educator of the Year" by the Washington Art Education Association and the "Pacific Regional Elementary Art Educator of the Year" by the National Art Education Associat ion. He is also a recognized jewelry artist who has exhibited nationally, in Europe and the Northwest. S o y a J u n g In the Northwest, Soya spent a couple of long years at the International Examiner, and worked as a propagandist for the Democrats in Olympia. For now, she is the coordinator of the Washington All iance for Immigrant and Refugee Justice. B o b Shimabukuro Robert Shimabukuro is currently executive director of A P A C . Of Leaving Si lence, he says, "It was the right time for someone to do a project like this. Better us than anybody else. So we did it." Janet SooHoo Janet is a community organizer and political activist in spirit and action, an artist shoulda been, and the Deputy Director of Asian Counsel ing and Referral Service in reality. Alice Wu Although the bulk of Ms . Wu 's twenties have been spent creating multimedia music publications for the Internet, she finds solace in her volunteer activities with groups such as ALBA, of which she is a co-founder. List of Honorary Advisory Committee Members Aldo Chan Ron Chew Eric Ishino Vivian Luna la Rodriguez Bob Santos Joby Shimomura Frieda Takemura Norma Timbang The Honorable Martha Choe, Seattle City Counci l . The Honorable Velma Veloria, W A State Representative. Queering the Pacific Northwest 108 APPENDIX C Queering the Pacific Northwest 109 Funders: Pride Foundation City of Seattle, Department of Neighborhoods. B PRIDE FOUNDATION® Individual Donors (to date): John Blatchford Genevieve Buckley Aldo Chan Judy Chen & Leslie Komori Dao-Liang Chou Anne Xuan Clark Vinh Do Eric Ishino Michelle Kumata Kelvin Lee Serena Louie Rhena Miller Ruth Miska Michael Olson Phi T. Pham a Von D. Brady Hoang Huy Phan & Stephen H. Blodgett Melissa S. K. Ponder la Rodriguez Erika A. Schwarzwald Bob Shimabukuro Janet SooHoo Kayleen Stration Frieda Takemura Paul Tamura & Dennis Tran Greg Tuai Alexandra Tuai Venus Velazquez Alison M. Warp Benling Wong Dorothy Wong Alice Wu Community Sponsorships & "In-Kind" Services Asian Counseling and Referral Service Asian Lesbian and Bisexual Alliance Asian Pacific AIDS Council Asian Pacific Islander Homosexuality/ Homophobia Education Project Committee To Elect Cai Anderson Foreign Affairs Catering & Four Seas Restaurant Inays Kitchen Inc. International Community Health Services The International Examiner KeeperKard Lesbian & Gay Heritage Alliance The Lesbian Resource Center Merchants Parking/Transia Microsoft Northwest Asian American Theatre Northwest Nikkei Queer 8 Asian Red & Black Books Royal Glass Company The Wing Luke Asian Museum Washington Education Association Washington Federation of State Employees, AFL-CIO, Local 443 Community Endorsements: Asian Pacific Task Force - Church Council of Greater Seattle Bailey - Boushay House Gay City Health Project Lambert House Northwest AIDS Foundation Northwest Lesbian & Gay History Musuem Project Pacific Islander and Asian Young Women's Resource Gathering People of Color Against AIDS Network Seattle Chinatown/International District Preservation and Development Authority Washington Alliance for Immigrant and Refugee Justice Queering the Pacific Northwest 110 APPENDIX D Queering the Pacific Northwest 111 Queer Abiawc> P&j^ufics I&cvnd&r GraJUnibtory ilxhXhituyn/ Seattle^, Wa^hiri^iorv Transcript Index Form Date: Place: Length: Personal Data Interview Subject Name: Address: : Interviewer Name: Address: . Length of Acquaintance with the Interview Subject: Interview Data Key Words: , Abstract of Interview: Additional Comments: For use by the Project Coordinator only Q Selected Date: • Rejected Date: Reason(s) for rejection: Queering the Pacific Northwest 112 APPENDIX E Queering the Pacific Northwest 113 Queer AyCcwi/tr Vcu^ifioIdaA^d&r O red/ H tirtory E xhtkition/ ' Seattle/, Wathtngton/ Interview Questions l-l When and where were you born? Where were you raised? 2. How would you describe your ethnicity? Which generation of immigrant do you belong to? 3. How would you describe your sexual identity? Did you marry? Do you have any children? 4. When and how did you come out? Did you come out to the "larger" gay community or Asian communities? What made you decide to come out in the community you chose? 5. How did your (biological/chosen) family members react to your coming out? 6. Where are your (biological/chosen) family members now? Will they be available for photographs? 7 Does language create any barriers for your (biological/chosen) family members to understand your sexual identity? 8. Do you feel any cultural barriers in coming out to yourself and your (biological/chosen) family members? Did your (biological/chosen) parents stress any cultural values? 9. How do you think Asian communities are reacting to homosexuality? Does your family react in similar ways? Where do you usually find emotional support ? 10. What is your occupation? Have you participated in any community or political organizations? 11. Describe what being queer and Asian means to you. 12. What is your relationship to the "larger" gay communities? 13. Did you experience unfair treatment in Asian communities or the larger gay communities for being queer and Asian? 14. How does your family members react to your visibility as a queer Asian? 15. Do you think the queer Asian community in Seattle reflect diversity (in terms of class, ethnicity, age, physical ability, age, sexual identity, language, generations of immigrant)? 16. How has the queer Asian community changed from your earliest memories until today? 17. What do you foresee in the future for stronger queer Asian solidarity? 18. What are some of the issues not addressed by Asian communities and the "larger" gay communities? Queering the Pacific Northwest 114 APPENDIX F Queering the Pacific Northwest 115 Q u e e r Atiwn/£r API S&attAe;, Washington/ Consent Form for Interview Subject/Narrator I hereby grant, to the Queer Asian Oral History Exhibition of Seattle, Washington, permission to use the contents of our interviews, whether tape recorded or otherwise, for such scholarly and educational purposes as the Advisory Committee of the Exhibition shall determine, including literary publication. I also grant permission for the purposes of the Exhibition to reproduce and use any photographs taken or donated to the Exhibit. It is to my understanding that the Project Coordinator may have to exclude my interview from the Queer Asian Oral History Exhibition in order to have a diverse representation of queer Asians' experiences. I shall be notified of this decision as soon as the Project Coordinator, in consultation with Advisory Committee members, allowed such an exclusion. The Project Coordinator is responsible for editing the interview to fit the crilerias of the Exhibit. The final text will be made available for feedback on my part and the Project Coordinator will work collaboratively with me on the final text if disagreements occur. During the travelling period of the Exhibition, the tape recordings, notes, photographs created or preserved by this Exhibition may be used or displayed in public locations (such as in galleries, coffee shops, libraries, community centers or museums), which would take temporary possession of these materials and make them available for use by researchers and members of the public. This agreement is subject to any special conditions listed below. Special conditions: Subject of Tape(s): Name of interview subject/narrator: Address of interviewee: Name of interviewer: Address of interviewer: Signature of interview subject/narrator: Signature of interviewer (witness): Date of agreement: The Queer Asian Oral History Exhibit is made possible through generous contributions from Pride Foundation. City of Scattlc(Depanmenl of Neighborhoods). Asian Lesbian & Bisexual Alliance, Queer 'n' Asian. Asian Pacific Islander Homosexuality/Homophobia Education Project Asian Pacific AIDS Council and individual donations. Queering the Pacific Northwest 116 APPENDIX G Queering the Pacific Northwest 117 Leaving Silence: Queer Asian/Pacific Islander Oral History Exhibit Seattle, Washington October, 1996 Please mark your volunteer position for the Exhibit. O Advisory Committee Member O Interviewer O Interview Subject/Narrator O Other, please specify: Period of involvement: Number of hours contributed (estimation): Please outline your volunteer activities for this Exhibit: How did you know about the project? O Queer&Asian O Asian Lesbian & Bisexual Alliance O Asian Pacific AIDS Council O Asian Pacific Islander Homosexuality/Homophobia Education Project O Media, please specify: : O Friends How did you get involved in this project? Why did you get involved in this project? Do you have any comments on the structure, coordination or objectives of the Exhibit? What kind of queer Asian/Pacific Islander projects would you like to see in the near future? Would you be interested in helping us organize future events? (Please feci free to use the next page for further comments.) (Optional): Name: Contact Number: Thank you very much for your feedback. Queering the Pacific Northwest 118 APPENDIX H Queering the Pacific Northwest 119 Register Listing 10/29/96 Through 10/29/96 Dale Num Transaction Decrease J Increase Balance 10/29/96 Opening Balance •1 0.00 0.00 10/29/96 Pride Foundation 6,600.00 ' 6,600.00 10/29/96 City of Seattle, Dept. of Neigh. 5,000.00 11.600.00 10/29/96 Queer&Asian 250.00 11,850.00 10/29/96 Asian Lesbian U Uisexual Alliance 150.00 12,000.00 10/29/96 APIHHEP 200.00 12,200.00 10/29/96 Donations (Cash & Cheques) 3,750.00 15,950.00 10/29/96 APAC Rent 600.00 15,350.00 10/29/96 Project Coordinator 8,662.00 6,688.00 10/29/96 Photographer 1,000.00 5,688.00 10/29/96 Graphic Designer 1,000.00 4,688.00 10/29/96 Office Supplies 128.82 4,559.18 10/29/96 Postage 292.16 4,267.02 10/29/96 U.S. Immigration (Work Permit) 56.00 4,211.02 10/29/96 Publicity: Printing 1,246.28 2,964.74 10/29/96 Raw Materials for Construction 858.34 2,106.40 10/29/96 Photocopying of Exhibit Materials 152.00 1,954.40 10/29/96 Portraits: Printing tc Mounting 1,130.14 824.26 10/29/96 Opening Reception 347.96 476.30 The above budget does not include postage to national queer Asian/Pacific Islander organizations and other organizations interested in the Exhibit. Approximately $150 will be spent on sending the promotional booklet to over 200 organizations. Here is s o m e t h i n g to c e l e b r a t e : 176 persons signed in at the Opening Reception with some of them from Anchorage, Vancouver B.C., Portland, San Francisco, Los Angeles and New York. Just to let y o u k n o w , not everyone signed in at the front table. Imagine Fundraising efforts by Advisory Committee members and individuals from the International District communities came to a total of S 3 , 5 0 0 . Funds were used in m a n y different ways: The number of panels increased f r o m four to twelve. Framing, of the Exhibit was made possible. More photographs were printed for each interview subject. A promotional booklet was launched at the Opening Reception. M e d i a Coverage (to date): Beacon Hill News, Downtown Source, The International Examiner, Kiro News (Special P r o g r a m ) , Northwest Asian W e e k l y , Northwest N i k k e i , Seattle Gay News, Southend District J o u r n a l , Ultra Violet (Lesbian Resource Center Publication). For all touring requests and extra promotional booklets (available January 1, 1997), please contact: Jim Rosengren Exhibit Touring Services, Eastern Washington University, Co//ege of Letters, Arts and Social Sciences Mail Stop 159, 526 5th St., Cheney, Washington 99004-2431. Phone numbers: 1-800-356-1256 or (509) 359-4331. Queering the Pacific Northwest 120 APPENDIX I Queering the Pacific Northwest 121 Bookda Gheisar Bookda Gheisar Born 1962, Tehran, Iran. Iranian/Executive Director of the Cross Cultural Health Care Program I never heard the word "lesbian" growing up and was not at all aware that "lesbian" had an equivalent in Farsi. When I was coming out and explaining that I am involved with women, my mom said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say to me. I'm also involved with women!" I think that has a lot to do with women's relationships in Iran and a lot of other countries outside of the United States. As I was growing up, I would go all the time to women-only parties with my mother. My mom had a lot of very close women friends. I tried to explain further to my mother, "I'm really interested in women, and being a part of women's community." And she said, "I know what you mean, that's the way we all are." So I had to add, "But you're going to have to really understand this, I have sex with women. I do something that you don't do with your woman friends." And the of course, I found out that women often do that too, in Iran, but in hiding and not in the open. Queering the Pacific Northwest 122 Perveen AN Perveen Ali Born 1973, Denver, Colorado, United States. Bangladeshi & American/Anti-Oppression/Liberation Worker It was always in my consciousness although I didn't have a language to talk about it. I heard the words gay and lesbian but I've never heard bisexual. There're all these things about my life that is a kind of life living in between cultures. I mean I'm bi-racial, I'm bisexual. To me, coming out was not so much revealing my sexual identity to my friends, which most of them already know, but it was coming out as a political person. There is a certain amount of invisibility that I experienced primarily because "Asian" is such a broad category. Most Asian groups that call themselves Asian are Southeast Asians, and they know little about South Asia. They also don't talk about issues around what it is to be queer and Asian. For instance, some Asian groups I work with, they do a lot of work supporting Asian kids in schools but they never talk about what it is to be a gay Asian kid in junior high or they don't talk about the Asian kid's experiencing homophobia at school. I've noticed in the queer Asian community an incredible focus on what it means to be Asian-American. So first-generation immigrants are frequently left out and their issues are left out. It is understandable because you have to choose your projects and what you're gonna work on, but I think if we want more solidarity, we have to address queer Asian issues in an international context. Queering the Pacific Northwest 123 Ernesto Rios and Leonilla Rios Bobadilla (mother) Ernesto Rios Born 1948, General Trias, Cavite, The Philippines. Filipino/Business Entrepreneur I didn't tell my family. They just knew when I was growing up. In my small town in Cavite, if there are gay children in the family, they think you are jinx, bad luck. But my family didn't believe that, they still love me, and I said, "Hey, I'm not going to be bad luck. I'm the one who brings the good luck in the family." You know what, I grew up with a big family. Even though my mom and dad had jobs, it's not enough to support eleven kids, so we grew up being poor. I was not embarrassed to go out on the streets and sell anything. I sold candies, I sold bread, I sold bananas, I sold peanuts, anything. Once in a while, I get depressed over a person or over the business, but it doesn't last. I learnt how to cope with my life. A new day always bring me a fresh start, you know, and I thank the Lord every morning. Queering the Pacific Northwest 124 Eric Ishino Born 1954, Seattle, Washington, United States. Japanese/Administrative Services Manager, Seattle City Council. I think because we live in a predominantly white society and Asians and Pacific Islanders are not portrayed extensively in the media nor represented in great numbers in gay and lesbian organizations, there is not a realization of how diverse the gay and lesbian community really is - that we really do come in all colors. Being a partner to an elected official (State Senator Cai Anderson) was quite rewarding and also frustrating with the hectic schedule and loss of privacy. In addition, it was challenging to have a sense of my own identity. I think some people thought all I was the dutiful partner, kind of like the dressing on the side and may not have realized the extent that I participated in his political career. Throughout his eight years in office I was his campaign treasurer and jack-of-all trades campaign worker, helped write and edit his speeches and newsletters and acted as an advisor on many issues. In my 10 1/2 year relationship with Cai , we tried to live life to its fullest in work and in play. I knew that he was HIV positive from the very beginning. Sure, it was in the back of the mind that someday he might get sick but had I decided to end the relationship, I would not have had the joy of those incredible years with Cai . I really felt that I started living when I met him. So, when he died in 1995, a part of me died. But, the wonderful memories, all that I learned from Cai and the personal growth I experienced during our years together, have given me the strength to carry on - and to love again. Queering the Pacific Northwest 125 Left to Right: Buster, Ron Ho and Ray Ho (brother). Ron Ho Born 1936, Honolulu, Hawaii, United States. Chinese/ Jewelry Artist I guess, probably from the time I was 15, I always knew that I was attracted to men. My mother died of cancer about 10 years ago. I was home in Hawaii and we started talking about me being a gay Asian man. It took so long to actually tell them because it was not something that was easy to talk about as far as being Chinese. Those things aren't discussed generally in the Chinese family. My Dad was close to his eighties at that time. He said he loved me no matter what and that was fine. My sister and I were always very close. She was there through the last days when my mother was dying. She asked my mother if she knew that I was gay and my mother said that she knew. Mothers know those sorts of things. My brother loves me. Ray is as fine a brother as one could ever have. He's a very wonderful, open, generous person who is always willing to give me a hand whenever I need a hand. He also is a good listener. Whenever I've had problems in my relationships I've talked to my brother. I was also in a profession where those things weren't actually talked about either. Now I'm retired as teacher and I do art workshops on occasion in schools. I taught for 34 years, 32 of those with the Bellevue School District. Queering the Pacific Northwest 126 S.E.L. asked Tracy Tsutsumoto (staff graphic designer) to draw a sun to represent her image for the exhibit. S.E.L. Born 1960, Seattle, Washington, United States. Chinese/Transgendered Male-to-Female/Entrepreneur Personally, I don't know of any transgendered Asians. There are two reasons for that, I don't circulate around very much. I mean I do get around but maybe not in similar areas or circles as other transgendered Asians. The second reason is my individual issue of not coming out as a transgendered person. I get emotional support from being myself and also from my friends. I have been to different support groups for four to five years. I just could not relate. A lot of the people in the support groups have personal problems, s u c h a s the i r l i v e s b e i n g s c r e w e d u p . So a r e you trying to tell me t ha t I a m going nowhere with my life as a transgendered person? To me, I have a very functional life. I am not looking for an escape by becoming a male-to-female transgendered person. I am 36 years old. I am Chinese and I was born in Seattle. I began the process of becoming female in January 1993.1 had experience doing the part-time thing, a part-time woman. Finally, I said to myself, "I am going to give myself a chance to be myself." The process will be completely finished by March, 1997. My family knows. My mother is still in major denial. She said that it was her worst nightmare and this was like a spear in her heart, and now she has nothing to rest in peace. At first I thought it was my fault. Then in a day or two, I realized that she is no different than any Chinese mother. That is mom. This is the only way she knows how to react as traumatic as she is. Queering the Pacific Northwest 127 Tino Umali Tino Umali Born 1979, Seattle, Washington, United States. Thai, Chinese, East Indian, Filipino, Spanish/queer youth activist/student/Calvin Klein fragrance model For my junior year in Garfield High School, I made the cheer squad as a yell leader. By October, the school told me that I was not supposed to dance because I was a yell leader, not a cheer leader. I should just call out the cheers and do the arm movements, but no swinging of the hips or anything. My mom went to the principal's office and said, "You're just discriminating against my son because he's gay." The principal said. "This is not the issue. We didn't make these rules up. It's the Washington Interscholastic Athletic Association." My mom just went, "Yes, it is an issue. It's discrimination." So we called WIAA up and they told us that there are no guidelines saying what a yell leader does or what a cheer leader does. Then the school found out that they were wrong and we could sue them. They dropped it but they changed the paperwork for next year, adding a tiny sentence saying, "The yell leaders will not perform the dance routine." Queering the Pacific Northwest 128 Left to Right: Tanith Songsook Kimsing, Suzanne Kimsing (sister) and Chong Cha Gluesing (mother). Tanith Songsook Kimsing Born 1969, Seoul, Korea. Korean, German & Swede/Lesbian/Supporter of Vaginal Pride/Bearer of Interesting Times/Non-Vindictive I came out when I was 23. I came out to my mom after my break-up with my first girlfriend. I didn't care what anybody thought, I was just so heartbroken so all she could say over and over was "Oh my goodness." She was like "Oh I always knew 50 percent and then I saw you with her, 75 percent, and now it is 100 percent." My sister, was the first one to know. She is 100 percent supportive. I think I might want to go to Korea, teach English and learn about the Korean culture. My mom tells me to go ahead, grow out my hair and get rid of my piercings. Then I'll have a lot more respect. I know it'll be hard in Korea, for one thing I am mixed, and another thing I am Western. My mom told me times have changed. But I don't' know really. We'll see what happens. My spirit is the survivor. Queering the Pacific Northwest 129 Left to Right: Katayoun Issari, Val Kanuha, Ann Lee, Hanson Lee and Nan Stoops. Val Kanuha Born 1951, Hilo, Hawaii. Hawaiian-Chinese, and Japanese/Community Activist/Social Worker I know I was very influenced - probably in many ways without knowing it as a young girl - by my mother's assertiveness, her competence as a public health nurse, and her dedication to my brothers, sister and me as a mother. I always thought of her as a role model for what and how I wanted to be when I grew up. My mother kept her maiden name as her middle name, so she always went by "Chitose Araki Kanuha." It wasn't until I grew up that I realized how unusual that was: To have a Japanese American mother of the 50's who used her maiden name as part of her work name. Often when I was growing up people would call me a "tomboy". I think it was a combination of how I looked and what I did. When I was in elementary school, all the boys liked me cause I could play sports just as well as the boys did. And, I was kind of a leader that could organize kids into teams which is usually thought of as a "boy thing". I sometimes felt embarrassed about being called a tomboy because I thought it meant that I was being more like a boy and I knew I wasn't really a boy. On the other hand, I was angry because I also felt that people - usually adults - were saying that it was a bad thing for a girl to act like a boy: to be athletic, strong, confident and yet in a strange way, to be liked by boys for only those reasons and not because I was a girl. Queering the Pacific Northwest 130 Karen Maeda Allman Karen Maeda Allman Born 1958, Wichita, Kansas, United States. Bookseller/PhD. Candidate in Nursing Let's see, I was a part of a group that called Asian Lesbian Network in 1989. I think we're called something like that. Some of these women are still around. The group was formed right after one of the National Asian lesbian gatherings in California, and we used to meet at the Lesbian Resource Center. Most women were of my age. There was a real pull between should we be doing activism or should we be doing a support group, as well as discussion on the purpose of the group. For me, it was very liberating at that time to even see other Asian lesbians because that was my only and my first opportunity to meet other Asian lesbians. Now in the Asian lesbian and bisexual community, there're the early twenty year olds, and then some of us in late thirties, forties, and I think there are more queer Asian couples. There's more in-your-face activism and a lot more people queer Asians in the Pride Parade. There used to be only 4 or 5 of us with a banner. It's getting more exciting now. Queering the Pacific Northwest 131 Left to Right: Thorn Gamble, Samuel Yao, Dave Drew and Henry Drew (brother). Dave Drew Born 1971, Vung Tau, Sai-gon, Vietnam. Vietnamese & German & English/Club Kid/Drag Queen/Performance Artist/Singer/Spoken-word Artist/Painter/Multi-ethnic/Freak It happened in Seattle on January 30 t h , 1991. I got on the bus with my friend because we were going to be a Queer Nation meeting. We sat in the back and these three guys came on the bus. They asked us if we were gay and I said yes. They were on acid and they had knives. They didn't like queers. Things happened and knives were flying here and there. Then they ran off the bus and we told the bus driver, "Yo, something just happened. Call the police." The police caught two of them in five minutes. There were so many people on that bus who heard the whole fucking thing. But no one did anything because they were too caught up in their own lives. I've gone through this fag-bashing, and I've gone through so many different people trying to hurt me. Basically I found out that the only person who can really hurt me is myself, and hurting myself is not being who I am. Queering the Pacific Northwest 132 Left to Right: Natasha (daughter), Norma Timbang and Gabrielle (daughter). Norma Timbang Born 1956, Bremerton, Washington, United States. Filipino/Bisexual mother of Natasha and Gabrielle. I am out to my 11 year old and 13 year old daughters, Gabrielle and Natasha. I explain to them things like, hate crimes, physical and verbal bashing, especially bashing bisexuality and what it means to come out. Since they were young, both have accompanied me at holiday and other social and political gatherings with gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered friends. Their orientation to "more than just hetero" world has given them a perspective of diversity which I wish everyone of their peers had - one of open and genuine acceptance. They have both been very inquisitive about my bisexuality from time to time. They realize that instead of dating a man, I might be dating a woman. It's hard to bring up those issues. Many of their peers are homophobic. They're raised in a heterosexual world and I want to make sure that it doesn't hurt my daughters or nieces or whoever. I always envision my daughters' friends saying "Oh God, you're the one with the mother who likes women." I believe very strongly in teaching children to stand up for what they believe in. Every person has the human right to live different lifestyles. Queering the Pacific Northwest 133 Shirley Yee Shirley Yee Born 1959, New York, New York, United States. Chinese/Director of Women's Studies at the University of Washington. Seattle/Associate Professor in U.S. Women's History I've always known that I've been attracted to women. But I could never name it. It only occurred to me that I am a lesbian when I was in my late twenties. I had a very strong heterosexual identity and ties in my graduate student community then. I was living in Columbus and I didn't feel that comfortable coming out in that community. I also knew that I was coming to teach in Seattle. I figured that number one, Seattle has an Asian community that I needed, and second of all, that I could come out without any ties to the past. I could start life anew. When I came to the University of Washington, I was the first woman of color and lesbian of color in the faculty of Women's Studies. So I had to be quite cautious of choosing my associates, quite careful of choosing friends. 

Cite

Citation Scheme:

        

Citations by CSL (citeproc-js)

Usage Statistics

Share

Embed

Customize your widget with the following options, then copy and paste the code below into the HTML of your page to embed this item in your website.
                        
                            <div id="ubcOpenCollectionsWidgetDisplay">
                            <script id="ubcOpenCollectionsWidget"
                            src="{[{embed.src}]}"
                            data-item="{[{embed.item}]}"
                            data-collection="{[{embed.collection}]}"
                            data-metadata="{[{embed.showMetadata}]}"
                            data-width="{[{embed.width}]}"
                            async >
                            </script>
                            </div>
                        
                    
IIIF logo Our image viewer uses the IIIF 2.0 standard. To load this item in other compatible viewers, use this url:
http://iiif.library.ubc.ca/presentation/dsp.831.1-0055469/manifest

Comment

Related Items