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Conversations with Silence Butler, Jennifer Anne Elizabeth 2009

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CONVERSATIONS WITH SILENCE by JENNIFER ANNE ELIZABETH BUTLER  Hons. B. Mus., Wilfrid Laurier University, 1999 M. Mus., The University of British Colombia, 2002  A THESIS SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULFILLMENT OF THE REQUIREMENTS FOR THE DEGREE OF DOCTOR OF MUSICAL ARTS in THE FACULTY OF GRADUATE STUDIES  THE UNIVERSITY OF BRITISH COLUMBIA (Vancouver)  December 2009 © Jennifer Anne Elizabeth Butler, 2009  ABSTRACT Conversations with Silence is a collage theatre work of approximately 50 minutes in length. It is scored for mezzo-soprano, flute/piccolo/alto flute, clarinet/bass clarinet, cello, piano, percussion, and electroacoustics. The broad subject of the work is an exploration of female creativity and how gender plays a role in creating art. Although Conversations with Silence is an abstract examination of this topic, my inspiration began with four theoretical readings: Eva Rieger’s article "'I Recycle Sounds': Do Women Compose Differently?", Linda Catlin Smith’s essay “Composing Identity: What is a woman composer?”; Susan McClary’s book Feminine Endings; and Sally Macarthur’s book Feminist Aesthetics. In Conversations with Silence I emphasize many of the qualities of “feminist aesthetics” that were already present in my previous compositions in order to explore these musical ideas even further. The work consists of seventeen movements divided into five separate scenes. Each scene includes two to four movements and is centred around a different dramatic character. There is no linear narrative to connect the scenes and characters. In place of one story, Conversations with Silence offers an amalgamation of stories, characters, and ideas. Each scene has a different thematic focus, which relates to the central ideas of female creativity and feminist aesthetics.  ii  TABLE OF CONTENTS Abstract ............................................................................................................................................. ii Table of Contents .......................................................................................................................... iii List of Tables .................................................................................................................................. iv List of Figures .................................................................................................................................. v Acknowledgements ..................................................................................................................... vii CHAPTER 1  Introduction .......................................................................................................... 1 1.1 Conception ...................................................................................................... 2 1.2 Influences ........................................................................................................ 6 1.3 Challenges ..................................................................................................... 10  CHAPTER 2  The Parts .............................................................................................................. 2.1 Outline of Form ........................................................................................... 2.2 Defining the Genre ...................................................................................... 2.3 Process ........................................................................................................... 2.4 Non-linear Structure ................................................................................... 2.5 The Elements ................................................................................................  12 12 15 17 18 18  CHAPTER 3  Themes and Concepts ....................................................................................... 3.1 Different Approaches to Structure ........................................................... 3.2 Identity .......................................................................................................... 3.3 Isolation ......................................................................................................... 3.4 Communication ........................................................................................... 3.5 Connection to the Body .............................................................................. 3.6 Preference for Functional Music ............................................................... 3.7 Lineage and Canon .....................................................................................  25 26 34 37 37 38 39 40  CHAPTER 4  Materials: Scene by Scene ................................................................................. 4.1 Scene One ...................................................................................................... 4.2 Scene Two ..................................................................................................... 4.3 Scene Three ................................................................................................... 4.4 Scene Four ..................................................................................................... 4.5 Scene Five ......................................................................................................  42 42 47 53 69 78  CHAPTER 5  Conclusion .......................................................................................................... 5.1 Aesthetic Statement ..................................................................................... 5.2 Innovation and Contribution .................................................................... 5.3 Looking Back; Looking Forward ..............................................................  87 87 88 88  Bibliography .................................................................................................................................. 90 Musical Score for Conversations with Silence ............................................................................. 93  iii  LIST OF TABLES Table 1—Overview of Structure ................................................................................................ 13  iv  LIST OF FIGURES Figure 1  Harmonic Outline of “Eve” ........................................................................... 43  Figure 2  First Three Measures of “Eve” ...................................................................... 43  Figure 3  Example of Diatonic Sections in “Eve” ........................................................ 44  Figure 4  Climax of “Eve” ............................................................................................... 45  Figure 5  Final Measures of “Eve” ................................................................................. 45  Figure 6  Multiphonics in “Drift 1” ............................................................................... 46  Figure 7  Opening Page of “Breathe” ............................................................................ 48  Figure 8  Harmonic Outline of “Breathe” .................................................................... 49  Figure 9  Harmonic Outline of “Lullaby” Verses ....................................................... 50  Figure 10  Excerpt from Verse Two in “Lullaby” ......................................................... 50  Figure 11  Excerpt from End of Verse One in “Lullaby” ............................................. 51  Figure 12  First Chorus in “Lullaby” ............................................................................... 52  Figure 13  Final Measures of “Lullaby” .......................................................................... 52  Figure 14  Harmonic Comparison of “Unravel” and Notturno .................................. 54  Figure 15  Opening Measures of “Unravel” .................................................................. 55  Figure 16  First Climax of “Unravel” .............................................................................. 56  Figure 17  First Schumann Quotation in “Unravel” .................................................... 56  Figure 18  Measures 29—33 of “Unravel” ...................................................................... 57  Figure 19  Measures 40—44 of “Unravel” ...................................................................... 58  Figure 20  Corresponding Harmonies from Schumann’s Notturno .......................... 58  Figure 21  Lead up to Second Climax of “Unravel” ..................................................... 59  Figure 22  Final Measures of “Unravel” ......................................................................... 61  Figure 23  Vocal Line in Measures 9—12 in “Dearest” ................................................ 62  Figure 24  Vocal Line in Measures 21—24 in “Dearest” .............................................. 63  Figure 25  Vocal Line in Measures 52—56 in “Dearest” .............................................. 63  Figure 26  Opening Measures of “Dearest” ................................................................... 64  Figure 27  Piano Clusters in Verse Three of “Dearest” ................................................ 65  Figure 28  Snare Drum Ostinato in “Dearest” ............................................................... 65  Figure 29  Final Chorus of “Dearest” .............................................................................. 66  Figure 30  Opening of “Breathe” Reprise ....................................................................... 67  Figure 31  Grace Notes in “Breathe” Reprise ................................................................ 68  v  Figure 32  Ending of “Breathe” Reprise ......................................................................... 68  Figure 33  Examples of Foundational Trichord from “Folding Inward” ................. 70  Figure 34  Opening Measures of “Folding Inward” .................................................... 70  Figure 35  Example of Melodic Flourish in “Folding Inward” .................................. 72  Figure 36  Final Measures of “Folding Inward” ........................................................... 73  Figure 37  Sample of Repeating Pattern in “The Scarf” ............................................... 74  Figure 38  First Chorus in “The Scarf” ............................................................................ 75  Figure 39  Example of Silences in the Pattern in “The Scarf” ..................................... 76  Figure 40  Final Measures of “The Scarf” ....................................................................... 77  Figure 41  Final Multiphonic in “Drift 2” ....................................................................... 78  Figure 42  Opening of “Lingering” ................................................................................. 80  Figure 43  Near the End of “Lingering” ......................................................................... 80  Figure 44  Second Climax in “Lingering” ...................................................................... 80  Figure 45  Final Phrase of “Lingering” ........................................................................... 81  Figure 46  Opening Measures of “Folding Outward” ................................................. 82  Figure 47  Measures 20—23 of “Folding Outward” ..................................................... 84  Figure 48  Final Measures of “Folding Outward” ........................................................ 85  vi  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS I would like to thank Dr. Keith Hamel for continually offering me guidance and support for the duration of my work on this thesis composition. I have worked with Dr. Hamel since 1999, when I began a Master’s degree at UBC, and he has always been exceptionally generous with his time and his knowledge, perceptive in his understanding of my work, and consistent in the value of his comments and feedback. Dr. Dorothy Chang provided thoughtful observations that challenged me to articulate my ideas more thoroughly, undoubtedly making my thesis document stronger. Meryn Cadell guided me from my first naïve attempts at writing lyrics three years ago, giving me the confidence ultimately to include many of my own lyrics in this thesis. His thorough and sensitive reading of my thesis document was enormously helpful. Dr. Robert Pritchard has given unmatchable moral and artistic support since the beginning of my DMA. Kristy Farkas and Marci Rabe, with whom I have created collaborative projects over the past five years, gave not only their support and inspiration, but also allowed me to use their voices in the recorded samples I took from our CURV performances. I am especially grateful to Marci Rabe for learning, at the last minute, several of the songs included in this work for inclusion on a supplemental CD for the jury. Rachel Iwaasa also freely offered her time and talents for the CD, for which I am exceedingly thankful. Jordan Nobles and Mark McGregor, artistic directors of Redshift Music, have worked hard writing grants and planning a workshop for the fall of 2009, to give Conversations with Silence its premiere. They have also planned a staged performance of the work in their 2010/11 season. Their support has been important to me while composing this work, because it allowed me to create this composition knowing that I would soon experience it brought into the reality of performance. My parents deserve special recognition for wholeheartedly supporting my choice to pursue a career in the arts. Despite their occasional wish that I might have followed a path that offers more security, they have consistently encouraged me, sustained me through the hard times, and been there with me to celebrate my successes. They are responsible for putting me into my first music lessons, and have never wavered in their understanding of the ever-growing importance of music in my life. Finally, I would like to thank my husband Michael Begg. His love for the arts constantly reignites my passion for my work; his sharp intellect provides an ideal sounding board for every idea I can throw at him; and his perpetually positive stance on life has sustained me through each stressful phase of the past several years. There are not words to describe how indebted I am to him for the millions of tiny, daily actions that have helped me through this degree.  vii  Chapter 1 – Introduction Music does not just passively reflect society; it also serves as a public forum within which various models of gender organization (along with many other aspects of social life) are asserted, adopted, contested, and negotiated. -- Susan McClary1 Conversations with Silence is an interdisciplinary, theatrical collage piece written for Mezzo Soprano, electronics and chamber ensemble including: flute, clarinet, cello, piano, and percussion. The seventeen movements are divided into five scenes. Each scene includes two to four movements and is centred on a different dramatic character and a different thematic focus. At the end of each scene an electroacoustic interlude signals the change to the next scene. The broad subject of the work is an exploration of female creativity and how gender might play a role in creating art. Although Conversations with Silence is an abstract examination of this topic, my inspiration began with thinking about the absence of female composers in the history and canon of Western Art Music, and what this absence means to both contemporary female composers and to the genre of Art Music as a whole. The title indicates a central theme –- the silences left by the absence of women’s creative voices in music. Each movement in the work comments on this theme in some way. In this supporting document, I provide a brief introduction to several of the central issues within feminist musicology. The work of feminist writers has been an important source of inspiration for Conversations with Silence. In the following chapters I discuss the ways in which many feminist themes have influenced the creation of my work, and how this composition contributes to the ongoing dialogue within this field. Following the introduction given in Chapter One, I continue in Chapter Two with a detailed examination of the genre, and the process I used to create the work. I provide a table that outlines the essential elements of this piece for quick assessment of the whole  1  Susan McClary, Feminine Endings: Music, Gender, and Sexuality (Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press, 1991), 8.  1  work. I also discuss in turn each of the building blocks that create this piece: the lyrics and texts, the songs and the voice, the instrumentation, and the electronics. Chapter Three begins with a brief overview of “feminist aesthetics.” I then describe how the different themes and concepts taken from feminist musicology are explored throughout the piece. The themes I look at are: identity, communication, “restricted aesthetics”, silence, connection to the body, different approaches to structure, functional music, and the concept of musical lineage. Chapter Four provides a detailed analysis of Conversations with Silence, movement by movement. I look at unifying elements that appear throughout the work, and continue to discuss the themes and concepts identified in Chapter 3. In this chapter I also give a musical analysis of each piece, highlighting areas of specific interest. In my conclusion, Chapter Five, I offer an aesthetic statement, which discusses how my musical language was challenged through writing this piece and how ideas of feminist musicology were incorporated into my composition. I consider why Conversations with Silence is an important contribution to academic research and its place within contemporary art.  1.1 Conception 1.1.1 Why this piece now? My interest in combining music with theatre has been steadily growing since 2000, when I first became a member of R. Murray Schafer’s annual music-theatre project And Wolf Shall Inherit the Moon. Each summer for the past nine years I have returned to the forests of the Haliburton Wildlife Reserve to sing, act, dance, build, perform, collaborate, and compose with a talented group of dedicated artists. This venue has allowed me to experiment with my craft and explore new ways of making art. My experiences in the Wolf Project, as it is commonly known, led me to seek other opportunities to build skills necessary for my own creation of a music-theatre work.  2  By the time I entered the doctoral program at UBC in 2004, I knew that I wanted to explore a theatrical genre for my thesis project. I saw the doctorate as the perfect opportunity to dedicate several years to the creation of a large work that would bring together my many different skills and interests. Leading up to this work, I engaged in classes, projects, workshops, and collaborations to further develop my skills and knowledge to prepare myself for this project. In 2004, I took part in a weeklong workshop with Pacific Opera Victoria (POV), collaborating with writers and singers to create music in different operatic styles. In the 2005/06 school year, I participated in a new interdisciplinary course offered at UBC called “Creative Arts”. This course brought together students from Film, Creative Writing, Visual Arts, Theatre, and Music. We received four weeks of instruction in each subject area, and throughout the year created collaborative projects in assigned groups. The experience of this class led me to enroll in the Introduction to Lyrics and Libretto class taught by Meryn Cadell and Shari Ulrich in 2006/07, and then the Advanced class in 2007/08. It was in the Advanced class that I began writing the lyrics which have since become part of Conversations with Silence. One other major source of inspiration for this work was the creation of CURV in 2002. CURV is a composer collective I started with composers Kristy Farkas and Marci Rabe. Together we have created three 60-minute interdisciplinary works that have been presented by Vancouver New Music, the Western Front (Vancouver), and Continuum Contemporary Music (Toronto). The collaborative process used by CURV has influenced the compositional process I used for Conversations with Silence. CURV assembles large structures by overlapping, connecting, and juxtaposing smaller pieces and fragments. We use and recycle each other's materials freely, so that similar ideas continue throughout the work, but are used in different ways and in new contexts. While creating Conversations with Silence, I adopted a compositional method that drew upon my experiences with CURV, using a combination of intellectual consideration and intuition to create the form.  3  1.1.2  Why women and music?  The subject of female expressions of creativity, especially in music, is important to me both personally and professionally. Although my generation is one of the first in which a significant proportion of composers are female, female composers still constitute a small minority. This disparity is starkly apparent in, for example, the male-to-female ratios in graduate composition programs, university faculties, and the membership of the Canadian Music Centre.2 I am frequently the only female composer in a class or workshop and in concerts that feature my music. While I acknowledge that being the only woman can give me a certain distinction, it can be also isolating. As I grow older, I have found that being involved in such a male-dominated activity has had a significant influence on my development as a composer. Many events contributed to my choice to focus on women and music for my thesis project. One of the first, and perhaps most potent, of these events happened following a CURV performance in 2004. Generally, CURV received very positive feedback from the audience of this performance, which was almost entirely made up of our male colleagues. However, one comment that we heard several times was how our presentation came across as extremely female. Many observers also seemed baffled by our composition and freely commented that it was the “femaleness” which made it difficult for them to understand. However, the “femaleness” of our composition was entirely unintentional, and in fact, we had tried to make the piece gender neutral. Needless to say, this feedback surprised us greatly, and caused us to think about the role of gender in our future collaborations. What exactly was it that these men were reacting to? In 2005, I attended a panel discussion at the Open Ears Festival in Kitchener, Ontario. The subject of the panel was Women in New Music. I noticed during the discussion that there was a division of opinion between generations. Many women of my generation felt that this topic was no longer relevant. However, I disagree. In 2007, Alex Ross, music critic for The New Yorker magazine published a widely celebrated book The Rest is Noise.3 Although  For example, in the online database on the Canadian Music Centre (CMC) website, http://www.musiccentre.ca (accessed June 8, 2009), of the 724 composers listed, only 125, or 17.2%, are women. 3 Alex Ross, The Rest is Noise: Listening to the Twentieth Century (New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2007). 2  4  this book provides an imaginative history of 20th Century Music over its 543 pages, it fails to give any female composer serious attention. History books do not look into the past and find any “great” compositions created by women. The musical canon performed, studied, and taught in academia and other major musical institutions is still almost entirely, if not completely, male. Even the music of composers such as Clara Schumann or Fanny Mendelssohn, whose surnames are famous, is virtually unknown. While many women today have achieved successful careers as composers, I believe the effects of this absence from history continue to be profound. Seventy-five years ago Virginia Woolf wrote: One could not go to the map and say Columbus discovered America and Columbus was a woman; or take an apple and remark, Newton discovered the laws of gravitation and Newton was a woman; or look into the sky and say aeroplanes are flying overhead and aeroplanes were invented by women. There is no mark on the wall to measure the precise height of women. There are no yard measures, neatly divided into the fractions of an inch, that one can lay against the qualities of a good mother, or the devotion of daughter, or the fidelity of a sister, or the capacity of a housekeeper.4 One of my reasons for writing Conversations with Silence is to stimulate an exchange of ideas about the absence of women’s music in the canon of western art music, and how this absence continues to influence how we measure greatness in art. Music composition is an area marked and discussed by the achievements of particular men, and many aspects of expression—by men or women—are left out of the equation. The materials that have inspired me while writing Conversations with Silence include writings from feminist scholarship, feminist musicology, source writings by composers of the past and present, poetry, prose, and essays by female artists and theorists in other genres such as fiction, poetry, film, and the visual arts. Feminist musicological research on female composers has greatly helped to shape the direction of my thesis piece. The writers who have had the greatest influence on the materials of this piece are: Susan McClary (Feminine Endings), Sally Macarthur (Feminist Aesthetics), Linda Catlin Smith (“Composing 4  Virginia Woolf, A Room of One’s Own (London: Penguin Books, 1928), 85.  5  Identity: What is a woman composer?”), and Eva Rieger "'I Recycle Sounds': Do Women Compose Differently?"). Both feminism and feminist musicology have resulted in a significantly increased acceptance and inclusion of women’s music and female composers into academia and other institutions such as orchestras and music festivals. However, I believe there is a lack of awareness among composers of my generation of the significance of the continuing gender disparity found within current educational systems, concert programs, and basic numbers of professional composers. All of the women I have drawn on for inspiration have faced barriers to their creative output because of their gender. One of the reasons I have written Conversations with Silence is to honour the women who wrote music before me, and to recognize their struggles and achievements. It is important for feminist research to have a direct impact on contemporary composers and their work. As a composer, my language of expression is music. When I read the inspiring words found in feminist musicology, my response is to want to find a way to turn their ideas into music. When the ideas from academic scholarship are filtered through a work of art, it is my hope they will reach a broader audience, and speak to that audience in a new way.  1.2 Influences 1.2.1 Musical Influences I believe one of the first steps in solving the problem of “what is a woman composer?” is to become familiar with the work of female composers from the past and present. I have looked at the scores and writings (letters, diaries, and essays) of many female composers. There are several contemporary female composers who have had an influence on my composing, either through my studying their work, or through personal interaction. I have listened to the music of many women, which covers a huge range of genres and styles. When I began to search out the music of female composers, I wasn’t listening to discover a female sound, or to hear how women compose music differently from men. I  6  was simply curious. Much of this music was unknown to me. I listened to Joan Tower, Meredith Monk, Sophia Gubaidulina, Pauline Oliveros, Laurie Anderson, Kaija Saariaho, and many others. As I listened I sometimes felt a strong connection to the sounds, and at other times I didn’t. However, I was always aware that these women share something with me that my male mentors and influences don’t. I have a similar experience reading literature by women. The life experiences, perspectives, and topics of focus explored in the art of women are often more in tune with my life. I remember the first time I heard Linda C. Smith speak at a seminar at Wilfrid Laurier University, while I was an undergraduate student. She discussed her compositional process in a way that was new to me. I had been taught to carefully construct a plan for each new piece as an act of pre-composition. Smith admitted that she never did this, and allowed a piece to develop organically. At that time, as a novice composer, this insight opened new doors into my own creative process. Since then Smith’s music has also provided inspiration for my developing musical language. Her music isn’t concerned with forward direction, but instead forces the listener to accept each new moment with open ears. She largely uses delicate and quiet sounds, and with them is able to achieve incredible beauty. Pauline Oliveros has influenced me mostly through her writings and her focus on the importance of listening. I have also spent many hours listening to her improvised recordings that demonstrate her deeply developed ability to respond musically to the environment around her. Hildegard Westerkamp has also taught me about listening. I have had the pleasure of being guided on her soundwalks, where she silently leads a group of listeners on a walk carefully designed to heighten one’s sense of hearing. Her striking electroacoustic compositions guide her listeners in a similar way. She draws my attention to the tiniest details of sound, and causes me to listen more acutely to the world around me. Kaija Saariaho, as a spectral composer, uses a minimal pallet of pitches in her compositions. However, with this carefully chosen spectrum she takes instrumental colour and texture to unexpected places.  7  Other Canadian composers, such as Janet Danielson, Juliet Palmer, Alison Cameron and Ann Southam have inspired me through personal interaction. By observing their careers and talking to them about being women, and composers, these women have helped to open the path that I now walk.  1.2.2 Feminism In Canada, one often hears the claim that gender equality has been achieved, or nearly so, and that the struggle for women’s rights no longer needs to be a priority. However, through research, observation, and personal experience, I know this to be far from true. Even in our “advanced” society, the statistics are clear. Although the trends shown by most data are moving towards greater gender equality, inequality still exists between men and women when looking at income levels, childcare options, employment opportunities, enrollment in graduate studies, high levels of domestic violence, and the percentages of women and children living in poverty.5 I believe that the struggle for equality for women in the arts is an important part of the greater struggle for women’s rights. In her book Musical Democracy, Nancy S. Love identifies three ways in which music can contribute to the expansion of political discourse: 1) Music can blur the boundaries between linguistic consciousness and modern subjectivity 2) Music can raise consciousness, unsettling cultural identities 3) Music engages audiences and encourages response6 My hope is that Conversations with Silence will accomplish all of these goals by offering a new perspective and provoking new questions from many of its audience members on feminist ideas in musicology.  1.2.3 Feminist musicology In recent years there has been a growing volume of scholarship discussing women in music, and specifically female composers. Researchers in women’s and gender studies, 5 These statistics are available from Women in Canada: A Gender Based Statistical Report, online: http://www.statcan.gc.ca/bsolc/olc-cel/olc-cel?catno=89-503-x&lang=eng (accessed July 3, 2009). 6  Nancy S. Love, Musical Democracy (New York: State University of New York Press, 2006), 71.  8  psychology, ethnomusicology, and musicology have all contributed to the expansion of this topic. Feminist criticism in literary and art history genres emerged in the 1970s. A decade later the first contributions to feminist musicology appeared. Along with the writers I mention above, other women who have contributed greatly to this field, and to my research, are Jane Bowers, Judith Tick, Jill Halstead, Carol Neuls-Bates, Ruth Solie, Nicola Le Fanu, Marcia Citron, Sophie Fuller, and Ellen Koskoff.7 There is no separate women’s musical culture within Western Art Music, and no identifiable voice that represents female composers. As Susan McClary so poignantly states, “generations of women training to be performers or composers have learned not to let themselves ‘sound like women’.”8 Therefore it is very difficult to determine what role gender plays in the creation of music. It is fair to ask, as Sally MacArthur does: “Are there more differences between men’s and women’s styles than there are within each of them?”9 Many feminist musicologists have turned to the other arts, where a stronger female lineage exists, for models of where to begin their analysis. Writers such as Judith Butler, Virginia Woolf, Luce Irigaray, Adrienne Rich, and Teresa de Lauretis have provided a wealth of material from which to begin applying feminist thought to music. The New Grove Dictionary says: “Bringing women into music studies counts among the most remarkable contributions to musicology of the last 30 years of the 20th century.”10 The musicologists listed above, and many others, have started looking at the history of western music in a new way. Ethnographic music analysis recognizes that music is a social construction incapable of being removed from its social context. More conventional musicology has traditionally not taken this approach to music criticism, but many feminist musicologists have started using ethnographic questions to examine Western Art music. These women have opened the door to many important questions, such as: What is female creativity? What is women’s music? What roles do gender and sexuality have in how we listen to, analyze, and compose music? And, how has this shaped the development of Western Music as a genre? 7  See Bibliography for references to the important works by each of these women.  8  Susan McClary, Feminine Endings (Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press) 54.  9  Sally Macarthur, Feminist Aesthetics in Music (London: Greenwood Press, 2002), 19.  Peter Platt, “Gender and Sexual Studies” in Grove Music Online: http://www.oxfordmusiconline.com/subscriber/article/grove/music/46710pg2#S46710.2 (accessed October 10, 2008). 10  9  The significance of these questions isn’t in their answers, but that these are questions rarely asked. Throughout my compositional process these questions were a constant part of my exploration of female creativity in music. They lie quietly under the surface throughout every part of Conversations with Silence.  1.3 Challenges There are many challenges to working on a project that brings together so many different perspectives and ideas. The first and most difficult challenge, due to the vast scope of the topic, was to find a way to create a cohesive work out of so much possible material. I began with over 40 potential ideas for songs and pieces to include in this work. Gradually over time my focus became clearer and I eliminated all but the 16 remaining pieces. As I began to assemble the different texts, songs, fragments, electronic and instrumental pieces I had created and collected, it took many attempts to find the right blend and the right order. In fact, I continued the process of adding and subtracting new movements, texts, quotations and other fragments of sounds throughout my composition of the complete work. I also had to be constantly aware of the balance between making art and presenting information. From the beginning I wanted to avoid creating a piece that would be received as a lecture or musical essay on feminist musicology. I wanted to create, foremost, a work of art, one inspired partly by the ideas of feminist musicologists, partly by the past and present work of female composers and writers, and partly by my own personal experiences and responses to being a female composer. Musical and creative communication was always my main objective, and finding the right ways to communicate and express many months of research and reading through music and song was not easy. I constantly curbed my inclination to include more information, and instead searched for more expressive ways to present my ideas. Another challenge in writing this piece is, paradoxically, the lack of general knowledge about women’s music, writing, and art. This ignorance has caused me to carefully consider the importance of recognizability of the women quoted in this work. Because 10  increasing the awareness of female composers is important to me, I decided the audience should know the authors and composers of both the musical and textual quotations. Most audience members would not recognize the quotations I have included, if I did not choose to include their names as part of the presentation. The names of the women from whose work I have borrowed will be projected onto the stage as their material is heard, or listed in the program accompanying the performance. In this paper, and in my thesis composition, I have chosen to discuss women in music and the female creative voice because I am a woman, and a composer, and I am searching for a deeper understanding of how my gender fits into my creative identity. One main interest lies in investigating alternatives to the canon of Western Classical Music, and asking questions about how and why we as a musical culture place value on certain qualities within music over others. Gender is never a black and white issue, and creative artists draw on a full spectrum of influences. However, I also believe that women’s lives can include experiences that are inherent to their gender. Obvious examples are the physical and emotional experiences of pregnancy and childbirth. Music that comes from or is inspired by an experience that is distinctly female is for me an example of women’s music. I consider this to be separate from my discussions about feminist aesthetics, or the feminine in music. It is never my intention to suggest that certain styles, techniques, or sensibilities are only available to, or only preferred by, women. I want to be clear that I believe men and women both have equal access to masculine and feminine imagery and aesthetics. A major challenge, then, was to avoid obvious stereotypes, or encourage gender essentialism. I do not want to strengthen the position that “feminine” equals the tired clichés of timelessness, nature, stasis, gentleness, and community while masculine equals linear time, culture, progress, strength, and individuality. However, it was difficult to avoid these stereotypes completely while exploring the ideas of feminist musicology. My hope is that by remaining conscious of these essentialist traps I have explored the subject of my thesis with greater nuance and deepened creativity.  11  Chapter 2 – The Parts Music appears to be removed from the debates about social relations and cultural identity; it deals with abstract sound, not concrete issues. But music is indeed socially contingent and participates in the dynamics of culture. Which music is deemed canonic says a great deal about the image a society has of itself. – Maria Citron11 Laquiem is not music-theatre, nor is it concert music, nor is it requiem, nor is it cantata, and nor is it a song cycle; it is none of these things. It is something other. Laquiem is a self-defining genre that lies somewhere between these forms and speaks across them. – Andrée Greenwall12  2.1 Outline of Form Conversations with Silence is a collection of seventeen movements that are divided into five scenes. There is no story line, or linear narrative, to connect the scenes and characters. In place of one story, Conversations with Silence offers an amalgamation of stories, characters and ideas. Each scene has a different thematic focus, which relates to the central ideas of female creativity and feminist aesthetics. One of the most important components of each scene is a character song, from which the stories of the five main characters emerge. These songs are surrounded by instrumental pieces that reinforce the thematic ideas and explore different aspects of feminist aesthetics in music. Dispersed throughout Conversations with Silence are textual and musical quotations presented in a variety of ways – spoken, sung, pre-recorded, and projected onto the stage. At the end of each scene, a short electroacoustic interlude signals the change to the next scene. Chapter four gives a detailed description of each piece. The following table provides an overview of the thematic and dramatic structure of Conversations with Silence as a whole.  11  Marcia Citron, Gender and the Musical Canon (Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 1993), 3.  12  Macarthur, Feminist Aesthetics, 173.  12  Table 1 – Overview of Structure  Scene One Themes: Awakening Power Sensuality Memory  Movements  Character/ Setting  Musical Notes  Part 1: Eve (voice)  Eve: feminine, sexy, and confident.  Eve lyrics by Dorothy Livesay • tri-tones in melody • unsettled rhythms  Part 2: Drift 1 (fl., pno)  Outdoors on a sunny day.  Interlude One (electronics)  Character exits during Drift 1.  Sounds in Interlude 1 reflect themes Projected texts from lyric fragments  (6 minutes)  Scene Two Themes: Motherhood Loneliness Isolation Stillness Being voiceless  Part 1: Breathe (fl., cl, pno., perc., elec.)  A young mother: shy and gentle.  Part 2: Lullaby (MS, vc.)  In a nursery.  Part 3: Fragment from Unravel (picc., glsp., pno)  Character enters during Breathe and exits during Fragment.  (9 minutes)  Themes: Madness Artistic frustration Anonymity (14 minutes)  Breathe • vocal part heard through speakers • music spacious, notated along loose timeline Lullaby • modal • verse/chorus form Fragment • quiet, delicate, oscillating eighth notes  Interlude Two (electronics)  Scene Three  During “Drift 1” a short excerpt from Alma Schindler-Mahler’s “Ansturm” • use of minimal materials • flute multiphonics  Sounds in Interlude 2 reflect themes Projected texts from lyric fragments Part 1: Unravel (full ensemble)  Virginia Woolf on the brink of suicide.  Part 2: Dearest (MS, full ensemble, and elec.)  Beside a riverbank.  Part 3: Breathe Reprise (MS, vibe., pno., elec.)  Character enters during Unravel and exits during last verse of Dearest.  Interlude Three (electronics)  Unravel • based on piano Nocturne by Clara Schumann • interlocking rhythmic textures • projected texts from Clara Schumann’s diary Dearest • lyrics created from Virginia Woolf’s suicide letter • ensemble imitates water sounds under the voice • electronic: running water and whispered voices Breathe reprise • based on same musical gestures as Breathe • sung from offstage Sounds in Interlude 3 reflect themes Projected texts from lyric fragments  13  (Table 1 continued)  Scene Four Themes: Domestic life Obsession Narrow focus Smallness (13 minutes)  Movements  Character/ Setting  Part 1: Folding Inward (fl., cl., pno., vc)  An old woman: weak and tired.  Part 2: The Scarf (MS with full ensemble) Part 3: Fragment from Unravel (picc., glsp., pno.) Interlude Four (Mezzo and electronics)  She sits in a rocking chair knitting an extraordinarily long scarf.  Character enters during Folding Inward and exits during Fragment.  Musical Notes Folding Inward • formal shape is wedge moving towards a narrow centre • melodic flourishes embellish a mostly sustained texture • projected text from Corona Schroter The Scarf • accompaniment is a lively repeating pattern of sixteenth and eighth notes • verse/chorus form Fragment • quiet, delicate, oscillating eighth notes Interlude Four • electronic sounds reflect themes • includes vocal part on top of electronics using text from Linda C. Smith’s essay “Composing Identity” • projected texts from lyric fragments  Scene Five Themes: Sexuality Body Growth Expansion  Part 1: Drift 2 (fl., pno.)  A young lover: confident and poised.  Part 2: Lingering (mezzo)  In a cozy bedroom.  Part 3: Folding Outward (full ensemble with electronics)  Character enters during Drift 2 and remains on stage until the end.  (10 minutes)  Drift 2 • flute multiphonics • quotation from Fanny Mendelssohn’s Früling Lingering • sensual, flowing melody • spatially notated rhythms Folding Outward • form inspired by quotation from Emily Carr, which is spoken overtop • repeated tri-chord with bass drum provides strong foundation • constant rising motion in the phrases Lights fade during last phrases of Folding Outward Silence is held as an Emily Dickinson poem is projected onto stage  14  2.2 Defining the Genre Although Conversations with Silence is a staged work for a solo performer, it is distinct from the dramatic genres of opera or musical theatre because there is no linear storyline. It is also distinct from the song-cycle form, since the scenes have props, projections, acting, and a mixture of songs, instrumental, and electronic music. Therefore, the genre of this work is ambiguous and crosses the boundaries and conventions of several forms. I included the quotation by Andrée Greenwall at the beginning of this chapter because in it she defines her composition Laquiem by listing what it is not, rather than what it is. This type of definition also seems fitting for my thesis work. Conversations with Silence is not opera, it is not musical theatre, it is not concert music, and it is not a song-cycle. Instead, like Laquiem, it “is something other … that lies somewhere between these forms.”13 Although I considered the order of the five scenes very carefully based on their musical and thematic context, changing the order of the scenes would not interfere with comprehension of the drama. They are intentionally presented in non-chronological and non-hierarchical order.14 Instrumental and electro-acoustic pieces make up at least half of the musical material, and have as much importance to the underlying meaning of the piece as the more theatrical songs do. Furthermore, there are none of the common dramatic devices found in opera (or other forms of theatre) – there is no climax, no dramatic resolution, no hero/heroine and no villain. For these reasons I consider this work not to be an opera, but rather to be related to, although aesthetically distinct from, the traditions of chamber music theatre works and performance art such as Peter Maxwell Davies’ Eight Songs For a Mad King, John Cage’s Europeras, R. Murray Schafer’s Patria, or Laurie Anderson’s storytelling-based compositions, such as her recent project Homeland. A song cycle is “a group of individually complete songs designed as a unit. … The coherence regarded as a necessary attribute of song cycles may derive from the text (a single poet; a story line; a central theme or topic such as love or nature; a unifying mood; poetic form or gesture, as in a sonnet or ballad cycle) or from the musical procedures 13  Macarthur, Feminist Aesthetics, 173.  This is not to say that the order of the scenes is random, simply that the narrative is not linear. The order of the scenes is designed to create a musical and dramatic arch, with the highest level of intensity found in Scene 3. Scenes 1 and 5 bookend the work so as to create a sense of symmetry between the beginning and end. 14  15  (tonal schemes; recurring motifs, passages or entire songs; formal structures).”15 In the early planning stages of Conversations with Silence, I first imagined this piece as a collection of songs about women. However, as I developed the form over time, it became much more complex. Despite the fact that I have included no connecting narrative running through the work, this is a dramatic composition that is intended to be performed theatrically in a set with props and costumes. A series of songs runs throughout the work, but equally important are its other components, such as the instrumental and electroacoustic pieces, and the spoken and projected texts. Furthermore, some parts are only short fragments of melody or a distant voice heard from off-stage, layered on top of a more elaborate instrumental element. The best definition that I can provide for Conversations with Silence is a theatrical collage. In this collage there are many different elements: songs, quotations, instrumental pieces, electro-acoustic pieces, silence, spoken text, text projections, and fragments from all of the above. A collage “refers to the act of pasting diverse objects, fragments or clippings onto a background, or to the work of art that results. Musical collage is the juxtaposition of multiple quotations, styles or textures so that each element maintains its individuality.”16 I believe this description fits my composition well. In her book Feminist Aesthetics, Sally Macarthur states: “There has been a profusion of work by women that is arguably at the cutting edge in terms of genre development.”17 Women whose work clearly points in the direction of genre experimentation include: Diamanda Gallas, Pauline Oliveros, Meredith Monk, and Laurie Anderson. I have certainly found inspiration in the work of these women. Eva Rieger suggests that this type of genre experimentation could come from the concept of “Ganzheitlichkeit,” which she defines as “the quality of being complete.” She observes that it is common for women to “combine various fields of art,” and continues by explaining, “this probably has to do with women’s preference to combine rather than to tear apart, which again can be attributed to  15 Susan Youens. "Song cycle." In Grove Music Online. Oxford Music Online, http://www.oxfordmusiconline.com/subscriber/article/grove/music/26208 (accessed July 28, 2009). 16 J. Peter Burkholder. "Collage." In Grove Music Online. Oxford Music Online, http://www.oxfordmusiconline.com/subscriber/article/grove/music/53083 (accessed July 28, 2009). 17  Macarthur, Feminist Aesthetics, 178.  16  women’s role in society for many centuries.”18 It has indeed been my goal with this work to take a variety of pieces composed in different styles. I incorporated various recorded sounds, texts, and quotations and formed them into one unified whole.  2.3 Process The process I used for constructing the form of this piece was very much like the action of pasting objects onto a canvas. The form of the work was not predetermined, but rather assembled organically through a combination of intellect and intuition. The first step was to assemble the various materials: writing the texts, composing the songs and instrumental works, collecting the musical quotations and texts, recording the sounds, and composing the electroacoustic pieces. I began with a huge list of different ideas for pieces and songs I wanted to include in this work. Many of these were partly composed and later discarded. Over time, my focus sharpened and I gradually whittled this number down to the sixteen pieces now included. I rearranged and reordered the different pieces many times until I was satisfied with the musical and dramatic structure. I then chose two quotations from compositions by Fanny Mendelssohn and Alma Mahler, and pasted them on top of Drift 1 and Drift 2. My final step was to take a fragment from the end of “Unravel” and place it twice into the larger structure. I apply the metaphor of a quilt to my piece. Many quilts have multiple contributors, influences, or display multiple approaches and techniques. Although I have constructed my collage alone, I have felt a sense of collaboration with the women whose writings and music have influenced me, and even more directly from those whose music I have used in quotation and whose texts I have set as songs. As a member of the collaborative trio CURV, I have co-created three large interdisciplinary works, this process of first collecting and creating pieces, and then arranging them into a unified whole has become our standard working method. From my experiences with CURV, I have learned that this collage-like method for creating a form 18 Eva Rieger, "'I Recycle Sounds': Do Women Compose Differently?" in Oliver Strunk & Leo Treitler, eds., Source Readings in Music History (New York: Norton, 1998), 149.  17  allows me greater creativity and freedom when composing the smaller elements that will end up in the larger work. Instead of pre-designing the form and then composing the parts, I find that moving, shaping, and overlapping already created materials makes it easier to view the project as a whole, and evaluate any potential problems or weaknesses as I am working. I decided to apply the method CURV used to construct form to the creation of Conversations with Silence.  2.4 Non-linear Structure My decision to work with a less direct approach comes from my belief that overlapping and juxtaposing the texts, music, and sounds, would give these materials greater depth and dimension by expanding and deepening the possibilities of meaning and interpretation (both literal and abstract). Moreover, when the contexts of the different elements change upon repetition, the listener is able to infer new connections and significance from them. The topic of women in music is a complex one, with widely diverging opinions and attitudes among musicologists, composers, musicians, and theorists. The non-linear collage form of my piece is intended to encourage questions and stimulate discussion rather than impart a particular opinion. It is not my aim to convey a single point of view, but instead to present many points of view. I want to create an opening for contemplation of the ideas I am exploring. However, this work is, of course, a personal reflection, in which I have chosen and written texts and composed the music.  2.5 The Elements 2.5.1 The lyrics, the songs, the characters, and the voice I have chosen not to use the term libretto, since the texts in this work do not form a linear story line. Instead, I think of the songs as individual pieces with their own lyrics. As mentioned above, I wrote many of the lyrics used in Conversations with Silence specifically for this work. My original intention had been to create a libretto completely out of found texts by a variety of female writers. However, the two years I spent studying lyric and libretto writing with Meryn Cadell and Shari Ulrich gave me the confidence to contribute my own words to this work. I began to feel how powerful the connection between a composer and her own words can be. Over time I chose more of my own texts,  18  and fewer of the texts I had collected from others. By writing both the words and the music I have not only gained more control over the expressive content in this work, but have gained a more personal relationship with the characters. There are several reasons that songs play such an important role in the structure of this work. One is a nod to history. Many women composers in the past who were confined to their homes and small social circles turned to writing songs and keyboard works. The Woman Composer offers a table describing “women’s work in music by genre.”19 The table is created with information from The Encyclopedia of Women Composers, and shows the contributions from women composers to the genres of songs, keyboard works, and symphonies in the 18th, 19th, and 20th Centuries. This graph indicates the importance of song to women composers of the past and present. Song and vocal music continues to be a popular choice among female composers today, and comprises a notable proportion of works by composers such as Meredith Monk, Pauline Oliveros, Laurie Anderson, Jean Coulthard, and Barbara Pentland. Songs can tell stories, and create personal connections between performer and audience. The use of song has allowed me to create different characters, each with an individual story, style and manner. I have chosen a mezzo-soprano to be the central performer of my thesis because the mezzo is capable of both rich notes at the bottom of her register and powerful ones at the top. There are five character songs in Conversations with Silence, one per scene. These songs use a variety of compositional styles and require a range of vocal techniques. I wrote the lyrics for all of these songs, with the exception of “Eve,” which uses an excerpt from a poem of the same name by Canadian poet Dorothy Livesay. In the order in which they appear in the score, I provide a brief summary of each song. I discuss the music of the songs in detail in my analysis of the individual movements in Chapter Four. “Eve” (Scene One) is experiencing an awakening of her senses. I have emphasized her sensuous nature by setting this song in a very low vocal range. This song is set for solo 19 Jill Halstead, The Woman Composer: Creativity and the Gendered Politics of Musical Composition (Aldershot and Brookefield, USA: Ashgate, 1997), 173.  19  voice without accompaniment. The pitch centre is constantly shifting, and the melody emphasizes the tritone and major seventh. Generally the rhythm has an unmetered feel. Some vocal techniques are used, such as glissandi and occasional requests for a “breathy” tone. “Lullaby” (Scene Two) is an example of conventional vocal writing, reminiscent of the melodic and formal simplicity found in traditional lullabies. This song is accompanied by the cello, which provides straightforward harmonic and rhythmic support for the voice. This song follows the verse-chorus format. The lyrics, however, conflict with the straightforwardness of the music. Unlike a traditional lullaby, they reveal the mother’s feelings of being trapped in the nursery. “Dearest” (Scene Three) uses fragments of text from the suicide letter Virginia Woolf left for her husband. The accompaniment by the flute, clarinet, piano, and percussion is dense and relentless; constantly moving like the stream she drowns in. There is also an electroacoustic layer to this song that blends the sounds of rushing water and whispered vocal echoes that represent her madness. The vocal line is slow and chromatic, resembling the recitative style. “The Scarf” (Scene Four) is the liveliest of the five songs, with a quick unison accompaniment performed by the full ensemble. Here the mezzo-soprano plays an elderly woman, poor and tired from years of manual labour. She has become obsessed with her knitting, evident in the extraordinarily long red scarf that spills from her lap and surrounds her on the floor. “Lingering” (Scene Five) is another song for voice alone. Like “Eve”, this song is sensual both in terms of the lyrics and the music. A woman is remembering the feel of her lover’s hands upon her skin. The music is fluid and gentle. This song is composed of minimal motives that are ordered in different combinations throughout the piece. Although many of the characters in Conversations with Silence seem to be victims trapped by their circumstances—a mother in a nursery, Virginia Woolf by her madness, and an old  20  woman by her compulsive knitting—these characters all have a deeper dimension. None of them is silent. They all find a voice and with it an outlet for their need of expression: Eve is not an originator of sin in Livesay’s poem, but a woman discovering her strength. The young mother’s song courageously expresses her frustrations against a culture that assumes motherhood is every woman’s desire. Virginia Woolf in her madness has lost the ability to write. Rather than suffer this fate, she takes her own life. The old woman is obsessed with her scarf, yet through her knitting she is able to express her creativity. The final character, although awakened by her lover’s hands, has a confident knowledge of her sexuality—she is not passive or merely responsive. There are two other vocal parts in Conversations with Silence that are not character pieces. The first is “Breathe,” heard in Scene Two and reprised in Scene Three. In both scenes this song comes from an unseen voice: the first time it is heard as a recording, and the second time it is sung off stage. Both the words and melodic materials are repetitive and minimal. The first version has a spacious orchestration of repetitive gestures featuring the flute, clarinet, piano, and percussion. The accompaniment of the second version uses similar materials, but is more ornamented, and played only by the piano with occasional pulses on the vibraphone. During Interlude Four the singer speaks an excerpt from “What is a Woman Composer?,” an essay by Canadian composer Linda Catlin Smith. Halfway through the excerpt Smith moves away from prose to a more poetic language, which she places in italics. I have chosen to set this portion of the text apart by setting it to a recitative-like melody. The human voice is capable of producing a vast array of colours, expressions, and sounds. In the four interludes that create transitions between the scenes I explore different emotions using samples of various female vocal sounds such as sighing, inhaling, exhaling, humming, and various styles of singing. These electro-acoustic pieces do not include straightforward melodies or words; they are textural pieces made from a collage of sounds.  21  At the very end of the work, a spoken recording of a short quotation from the writings of Emily Carr is played simultaneously with the instrumental piece “Folding Outward”. This voice is used to evoke the sense of a separate reality, a voice from another dimension that speaks to the character on stage, who is now a contemporary woman, and an artist. The final message of the recorded voice is to let her “roots creep forth, gaining strength.”20  2.5.3 Additional texts In my research, one of the themes that repeatedly triggered my interest is the concept of creative lineage. All artists learn from the artists who have come before them. Art is a continuum of exploration and discovery. However, as a female artist, and especially as a female composer, it is difficult to find musical mentors and teachers who share some of the life experiences attached to being a woman. One reason I have decided to use texts by other women as well as my own lyrics is that I want to create a sense of connection between female composers and writers of the past and present. During “Unravel” in Scene Three, “Folding Inward” in Scene Four, and at the very end of Conversations with Silence, I will project some passages of text onto the stage behind the musicians. “Unravel”, as will be discussed in more detail in Chapter Four, is heavily inspired by a piano piece by Clara Schumann. Therefore, I felt it appropriate to select a series of excerpts from her diaries in which she writes about her work as a composer.21 For projections during “Folding Inward” I have chosen text that echoes the restrained quality of the music: text by the composer Corona Schroter that discusses her hesitation about publishing a set of songs.22 For the very end of the work I have chosen the following short poem by Emily Dickinson:  20 Emily Carr, Hundreds and Thousands: The Journals of Emily Carr (Vancouver: Douglas and McIntyre, 2007), 56-57. 21  See Musical Score, 119.  22  See Musical Score, 166.  22  The words the happy say are Paltry melody but those the silent feel are beautiful – 23 It was important to me to use writings that I have had a long relationship with. Although I began with a very long list of writers and excerpts to use in this work, my final selection is fairly small. With the exception of Clara Schumann and Corona Schroter, the writers I have selected to use in my score are writers that I have loved and read for many years: Virginia Woolf, Linda Catlin Smith, Dorothy Livesay, Emily Dickinson, and Emily Carr.  2.5.4 The instruments The instrumental component of this work will be a chamber ensemble of flute, clarinet, cello, piano, and percussion. Small mixed ensembles of winds, strings and percussion have become a standard ensemble for new music in North America. One reason I have chosen this particular instrumentation is because several prominent ensembles, such as Aventa (Victoria), Nu:BC (Vancouver), Continuum Contemporary Music (Toronto), and Eighth Blackbird (New York), to name just a few, have the same, or a very similar, composition. This mixed instrumentation also provides opportunities for great diversity in instrumental colour and texture. This diversity enables the ensemble to both accompany the voice and perform strictly instrumental sections. The ensemble performs as a whole as well as in smaller groups, pairings, and solos.  2.5.5 The electronics To broaden the scope of possible sounds available, Conversations with Silence also incorporates electroacoustic music. The most prominent use of electroacoustics is the four short interludes that act as transitions between the five scenes. These interludes are electronic collages composed from processed samples taken from a variety of sources. The four interludes have a distinct sound and role within the larger work, yet each is  23  Emily Dickinson, “The words the happy say” in R. W. Franklin, ed., The Poems of Emily Dickinson  (Cambridge, Mass.: Belknap Press of Harvard University Press, 1998), 629.  23  expressive of a different emotion that relates to the mood of the scene before it. In Chapter Four I discuss the interludes in more detail. I also use electronics to augment the vocal and instrumental parts of “Dearest”, heard in Scene Three. The sound of rushing water plays all the way through this piece, and whispered voices are added to this layer with gradually increasing intensity. The final uses of electronics are pre-recorded song fragments performed during “Breathe”, in Scene Two, and recorded spoken text played during “Folding Outward”, the final movement of Conversations with Silence. Another important aspect of using electroacoustic music in my thesis is that music technology is an area in which the gender imbalance is especially prominent. By including electroacoustics in Conversations with Silence I am creating a bridge between the themes within the piece and the stereotypes within the electronic music community.  24  Chapter 3 – Themes and Concepts By moving beyond the myth of the great artist working alone and by acknowledging the role of socially constructed systems both in present-day musical life and throughout musical history, we come to appreciate the importance and influence of our social system. – Jill Halstead24 Many feminist musicologists have ventured into the brave realm of analysing music from a feminist perspective. While most of the women who attempt this style of analysis agree that there is no universal sound for women’s music, the analysis of specific pieces has allowed theorists to detect commonalities found in women’s work. Three women in particular have had a great influence on the development of my thesis. The first article I encountered that tackled the topic of female aesthetics in music was Eva Rieger’s article "'I Recycle Sounds': Do Women Compose Differently?" In this article Rieger has identified a list of points that she finds “typical for a great deal of music written by women.”25 Susan McClary, one of the best-known—and most controversial—musicologists, approaches the analysis of women’s music from a particularly feminist standpoint. In her book Feminine Endings she identifies many musical qualities that take a stand against the celebrated and stereotypical masculine style. Finally, Sally Macarthur, in her book Feminist Aesthetics, uses the work of McClary and Rieger as a starting place for her own exploration of women’s music, and discusses at length how gender affects the aesthetic world of female composers. When reading the analysis of other women’s music in Feminine Endings, and the descriptions of feminine aesthetics as depicted by Sally Macarthur and Eva Rieger, I found that many of the “feminine” musical traits highlighted by these women were also reflective of my own musical language. In Conversations with Silence I chose to emphasize many of the qualities of “feminist aesthetics” that were already present in my previous compositions to explore these musical ideas even further: as a process of self-discovery, learning more about how and why I compose; and as a process of testing, in my own practice, the concept of a feminine aesthetic.  24  Halstead, The Woman Composer, 139.  25  Rieger, “I Recycle Sounds”, 147.  25  It should also be observed that the musical characteristics I discuss in this chapter are commonly found in the language of many 20th Century composers, both male and female. This observation reopens the question: can music express gender? Jill Halstead offers the following definition of gender: “the range of characteristics, behaviour, roles and values—masculinity and femininity—which are imposed on the sexes through conformity to social norms and through social interaction.”26 This definition separates biological sex from qualities and behaviours of gender. As I stated in Chapter One, I believe men and women both have equal access to masculine and feminine imagery and aesthetics. In general, many of the musical developments in the 20th Century have included an increased acceptance of the traits identified by feminist musicologists as “feminine.” I argue, however, that as a musical culture we still have a long way to go before feminine aesthetics are embraced. In this chapter I explore many of the points raised by McClary, Macarthur, and Rieger and give examples of how these musical characteristics have been integrated into my thesis composition. I will also explore the theme of creative lineage, discussing how and why I have quoted the music and writings of women in the past in this work. Chapter Four continues this analysis with a detailed examination of each scene, movement by movement, that returns to many of these themes.  3.1 Different Approaches to Structure 3.1.1 Cyclical patterns and open endings I chose to leave the setting of Conversations with Silence open, with room for interpretation. I also freely move between characters from the past and the present, and back again. There is no hierarchy of time or place; chronology, in this work, does not move in a straight line. The repetitions of musical materials, insertion of fragments from earlier parts of the piece, and quotations from historical female composers are designed to evoke a sense of the past. Conversations with Silence often invites the listener to turn back instead of steadily listening ahead. Macarthur cites the French feminist writer Irigaray, who offers a view of women’s sexual experience as “indefinite, cyclic, without set beginnings and  26  Halstead, The Woman Composer, 215.  26  endings.”27 My thesis composition exemplifies this idea of female sexuality by regularly resisting musical closure. Indeed, I designed the overall form of Conversations with Silence as a large cycle, never becoming closed or fully resolved. Within this large cycle are smaller phases that emphasize the sense of indefinite repetition. The regular insertion of formal elements, such as the four interludes, creates an expectation that each time an interlude begins a new phase is also beginning. The number of interludes is also significant – echoing the seasons, the points of a compass, and the essential elements – all of which continue with no closure. There are five main sections, or scenes, in Conversations with Silence, but the first and the last share much in common. For example, the first movement of the final scene is “Drift 2”, which begins with the final flute multiphonics heard in “Drift 1”, Scene One. My intention is that the opening of Scene Five should not only signal that an ending is coming, but also indicate a return to the beginning, creating a large cyclical form. “Eve”, the first song, is about an awakening of the senses, and in Scene Five, “Lingering” also communicates an awakening, this time a sexual awakening started by the touch of a lover’s hands. I wrote both of these songs for voice alone, and their melodies share a similar musical fluidity and sensuality. The final movement, “Folding Outward”, which I will discuss in more detail in Chapter 4, simultaneously concludes the work and suggests a continuation in the imaginations of the audience. Other types of cycles appear in the work. I use the chorus and verse form in “Lullaby”, “Dearest”, and “The Scarf”. This form echoes within each of these songs the larger form of the whole work: the choruses begin a new cycle within the songs each time they are heard; and the interludes operate as the chorus for the work. On an even smaller scale, other types of repetition create connecting threads that run through Conversations with Silence. Certain harmonies and rhythms are repeated numerous times; instrumental colours and techniques trigger memories from earlier movements; and musical fragments are detached from their original contexts and reappear somewhere new.  27  Macarthur, Feminine Endings, 117.  27  Several movements within Conversations with Silence also resist closure on a smaller scale. In both “Eve” and “Lullaby” phrases rarely end with a sense of tonal resolution. In “Eve” this resistance is especially pronounced, as I often end phrases a semitone below the transient pitch centers. I have also included fragments and short quotations throughout the larger work. Removed from their original contexts, they have no beginning and no ending. In “Dearest”, the character finds dramatic closure by drowning herself, but in many ways this closure is diluted. Her voice is heard off stage at the end of the song, evoking uncertainty even about the finite nature of death. The water and whispered voices also continue after her voice and body have left, a symbol of the continuing cycles of life. Time becomes a canvas without definable borders. In many places the lyrics in Conversations with Silence also reject dramatic resolution. The most obvious example of this appears in the “The Scarf”, which ends with the words “turn over.” These words are heard throughout the song at the end of each chorus. In a knitting pattern “turn over” means the knitter is to flip over the work and continue knitting on the other side. These words appear, or are implied, at the end of every line in a knitting pattern until the project is completed. In this song, the end of the project may never come, as the exceptional length of the scarf has already far exceeded usual limits, or utility. The repetition of these words and the appearance of the scarf indicate continual repetition into the future.  3.1.2 Sexuality, climax, and tonality The most stereotypical musical illustration of male sexuality is the urgent build to climax. The obvious connection between the male orgasm and the musical climax has been regularly used in musicological analysis. Feminist musicologists commonly connect the powerful striving for closure and the thrust towards climax (two of the most repeatedly used formal musical devices found in tonal music of the past three hundred years) directly to male sexuality. It is also common that these devices are, by and large, equated with a universally rewarding musical experience. However, the dramatic rise to a singular climax is only one of many possible erotic experiences, and also only one of many possible forms that can be musically rewarding. I  28  believe it is important to value alternatives to this form, and that no particular musical, or sexual, experience should be deemed universal. “As a woman,” writes Susan McClary, “I can recognize—and sometimes even enjoy—such a pattern, both in music and elsewhere in less metaphorical circumstances. But it is only one of many possible erotic experiences I know.”28 My own music sometimes contains climactic moments but I experiment with altering the frequency, placement, and final resolution of these peaks. Occasionally, my music omits the climax altogether causing the listener to anticipate an outcome that never comes. I find working with these alternatives extremely interesting and the music that explores them beautiful. Musical analysis often points to the common placement of a climax at or near the threequarter mark, followed by a release of tension. Sally Macarthur believes that the way women composers deal with climax can make their music sound “uniquely feminine … when compared to the idealized masculine climax, which tends to be shaped by the golden section.”29 In general, female erotic nature is described as being less concerned with going somewhere and having a sustained sense of pleasure. One way composers have achieved sustained pleasure is by resisting a sense of finality, or release, after a build to climax. Susan McClary suggests composers can sustain this tension “through the popular device of ostinato, in which each potential moment of closure is simultaneously the moment that guarantees continuation.”30 Many 20th century composers, both male and female, have explored alternative possibilities to the stereotypical climax, such as having multiple and varying climaxes, experimenting with the placement of climaxes, and removing the climax completely, or replacing it with silence. I have incorporated many of these alternatives to the traditional musical climax in my thesis composition, and have also used the standard dramatic forms. Movements that have multiple climaxes, or unusually placed climaxes, include “Unravel” and “Lingering”; movements that are without climax include “The Scarf”, “Lullaby”, “Drift”, “Folding Inward”, and “Folding Outward”; movements that use silence or  28  McClary, Feminine Endings, 126-27.  29  Macarthur, Feminist Aesthetics, 178.  30  McClary, Feminine Endings, 125.  29  absence in the place of a climax include “Dearest” and “Breathe”; and “Eve” is an example of a traditionally placed climax.  3.1.3 Restricted aesthetics A term coined by Eva Rieger is “restricted aesthetics”, which she defines as the “ability to create a maximum amount out of a minimum of material.”31 Rieger offers Pauline Oliveros, Annea Lockwood, Anne Gillis, and Joan La Barbara as composers who strive to “intensify the act of listening by limiting the material.”32 When I first came across this term, I experienced an immediate connection to the way I have often used musical materials in the past. Although I had never considered the restricted minimalist palette I often use as deliberately feminine, it was affirming to realize that this aspect of my musical language had a place within a larger community. Feminist musicologists who relate the lives and experiences of female composers of the past to the music they wrote often compare how men and women were socialized and educated for different purposes and with different expectations. Marcia J. Citron, in the introduction to Gender and the Musical Canon, states that: Absolute music inscribes a male psychological profile of growth that stresses quest and transcendence. The socialization process encourages separateness, exploration, and adventure, which result in personal change. The quest, whose early stages resemble rites of passage, is an important component. It includes the search for knowledge, self-knowledge, and self-realization – basically an amalgam of the three great male literary themes of Faust, Don Quixote, and Don Juan. … The developmental road traversing quest and transcendence has been described as a spiritual journey, a notion applied to male creative maturation but seldom if ever ascribed to a woman.33 If adventure, exploration, and a quest for knowledge are historically characteristic of the male experience, what might the historical female equivalent look like? Even until the middle of the 20th Century, it was common for women to be socialized to develop close to  31  Rieger, “I Recycle Sounds”, 147.  32  Ibid.  33  Marcia J. Citron, Gender and the Musical Canon (Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 1993), 23.  30  home, with little or no chance for travel and adventure.34 Women were taught to think of “we” rather than “I”, and to establish self-knowledge through interaction with others rather than through individual pursuits. Women’s sense of time and place was finite and tangible, and travel was rare. Their role as primary nurturer and caretaker of the family focused their attention on the here and now, rather than on the great beyond. There exists in these statements a delicate line to balance as I try to avoid essentializing certain attitudes or characteristics as not only masculine but male, and vice versa with the feminine and female. This line reflects the more fundamental balance in Conversations with Silence between the feminine/masculine and male/female. As I wrote in Chapter One, musical qualities that one might label masculine appear in women’s music, and feminine qualities appear in men’s music. What interests me is the extent to which both genders self-suppress the feminine; what my thesis explores, in part, is the under-expressed and often excluded feminine voice or aesthetic. Craving adventure, wanting to travel to new places, and working towards achievement and goals are not biologically male, but social restrictions denied most women the chance to develop these traits. Conversely, a less striving, goal-oriented life is not biologically female, but social expectations inhibit the adoption by men of alternative ways of living or creating. Our culture often equates one’s breadth of life experience and depth of formal education to how profound one’s thoughts or observations can be. However, reading the poetry, fiction, and essays of female writers from the 18th and 19th centuries, women who led far more restricted lives than their male colleagues, reveals a wealth of insight and philosophy created within the confines of their social constraints. Although achieving gender equality requires removing the restrictions placed on women’s lives, allowing women to engage in adventures and explorations outside of their traditional boundaries, I felt it important to recognize that there is an alternative type of beauty to be found in the repetitive subtleties of daily life. In Conversations with Silence I explore this type of beauty further by making many movements harmonically static or melodically and rhythmically repetitive. Instead of 34 I am talking here only of women in modern Western cultures. The restrictions listed above are still prevalent in many places around the world.  31  moving forward towards a primary goal or climax, I focus on constantly, but subtly, shifting changes occurring mostly on the surface. The music is not focused on where it is going, or what might come next, but instead creates a moment-to-moment sonic experience. “Folding Inward” and “Folding Outward” in Scenes Four and Five are particular examples of how I use “restricted aesthetics.” Both are created with only a small collection of notes, chords, and gestures in the palette. To heighten the sense of restraint, there are overlaps between the palettes of these two pieces. The materials are used in subtly changing ways, rarely repeated in exactly the same order or using the same instrumental colours, but with few diversions from the original set of sounds. In Chapter Four I will further describe the application of “restricted aesthetics” in these movements. “The Scarf” exhibits a different kind of restraint. The accompaniment for this song is a unison melody that repeats over and over throughout each of the four verses. The notes never change and the piece is completely static harmonically. In this song, the harmonic stasis suggests both the repetitive action of knitting the same stitch hundreds of times over, and also the monotony of daily life for poor working women who have little choice but to repeat the same chores every day. There can also be beauty found in stasis, however. When knitting, there is a certain hypnotic quality in the repetition that is highly enjoyable. As a knitter, after completing a series of rows, I often look with pride and pleasure at the pattern of stitches I have made. My final example is the source material for the four interludes. Each interlude uses a similar collection of recorded samples: breathing sounds, whispers, flute multiphonics, and female singing. Each interlude has some samples that are unique to it, but the majority of sounds are shared by all the interludes. By restricting my sounds to such limited resources I am working within a narrow soundworld, yet because of these limitations I have increased my level of intimacy with the sounds I chose to work with. The similarities among these electronic pieces, which connect each of the five scenes, also create more cohesion in the structure of Conversations with Silence.  32  3.1.4 Silence Many literary theorists have identified silence as a recurring theme in women’s writing. As the Encyclopedia of Feminist Literary Theory says: “feminist theorists argue that silence holds special significance for women, as writers and as literary characters, because of their political marginalization.” I feel silence is a fundamental and beautiful part of “restricted aesthetics” and of much of my music. Silence, as the title Conversations with Silence suggests, plays a vital role in my thesis composition. During the creation of this work I contemplated the many different meanings of silence. The Oxford Dictionary offers the following definitions: 1) 2) 3) 4)  Complete absence of sound. The fact or state of abstaining from speech The avoidance of mentioning or discussing something A short appointed period of time during which people stand still and do not speak as a sign of respect for a dead person or group of people 5) Cause to become silent; prohibit or prevent from speaking35 From the above definitions I considered many ways to incorporate silence into my thesis composition. This consideration led to some questions: When is silence a choice? When does silence empower? When is silence used to take power away? To gain power? How can silence hurt us? When do we want silence? How do we share silence? What causes us to be silent? How do we feel when silence is forced on us? I refer to silence directly only once, in “Breathe.” With its opening lyrics, “Breathe/Silently now/Be still silently,” this song invites the listener to become silent and still, breathing slowly and silently. What do we discover when we become silent? How do we feel? Pauline Oliveros’ book Deep Listening: A Composer’s Sound Practice originally inspired the two variations of “Breathe”. In this book Oliveros writes: There is no sound without silence before and after. Sound/silence is a symbiotic relationship. Sound and silence are relative to one another. … Listening to sounds means listening to silences, and vice versa. … Silence is the space between sounds.36  35  Oxford Dictionary of English, 2nd ed., s.v. “Silence.”  33  Other movements, especially “Drift”, “Folding Inwards”, and “Lingering” also include silence as an important part of the musical structure. In these movements sounds hover briefly and then fade in the quiet between notes. The listener is invited to hear the sounds lingering in their imaginations. Another use of silence is found in the instrumental accompaniment for “The Scarf”. Gradually the music becomes more and more spacious, leaving gaps where sounds once were. Perhaps a metaphor for dropped stitches or a loosening of the tension in the stitch. A different type of silence occurs at the end of “Dearest” when Virginia Woolf ends her life. During the final chorus of the song, the singer walks off the stage as if entering the water she sings to. Her departure is followed by a sustained pause. The silence is interrupted only by a slow pulse on the vibraphone. Other characters illustrate other types of silence. “Lullaby” is the story of a mother who feels trapped. While the cries of her child are able to fly free, her voice cannot escape the boundaries of the nursery. “The Scarf” is about a woman who has no outlet for her desire to create except her knitting. Both of these women have been restricted by their circumstances, given little space for their own voices, few outlets for their creativity. The history books offer these women no space, fixating on the monumental rather than the tissue that both holds culture together and forms it in smaller ways every day. Their songs are not remembered; their stories are forgotten.  3.2 Identity Identity is defined in the Oxford Dictionary as “the fact of being who or what a person or thing is; the characteristics determining who or what a person or thing is.”37 In Conversations with Silence, the theme of identity is explored in many of the movements. A strong sense of artistic identity is often contingent on visibility, which still remains far lower for female composers than for our male colleagues. Giving visibility to past female composers is one reason I have chosen to include musical quotations from the three female composers: Alma Schindler Mahler, Clara Wieck Schumann, and Fanny Mendelssohn 36  Pauline Oliveros, Deep Listening: A Composer’s Sound Practice (New York: iUniverse, 2005), 14.  37  Oxford Dictionary of English, 2nd ed., s.v. “Identity.”  34  Hensel. I chose to quote these three composers, not only because they are three of the most celebrated female composers from the past, but also because they carry the extra burden of always being in the shadow of the men who made their surnames famous: Robert Schumann, Felix Mendelssohn, and Gustav Mahler. Another reason I included these quotations is to highlight the anonymity of female composers. It is very likely that the listening audience will not recognize these quotations. Although their names are famous, their music is virtually unknown. Unlike the typical use of quotation in music, my purpose in quoting these three composers relies on the fact that the audience will not recognize the music. The musical quotations I have chosen are always performed by the piano. I chose the piano for two reasons. First, the consistency of instrument makes it easier to recognize when a quotation is being played. This is important because I want the audience to notice the moments of quotation. Second, the piano was the principal instrument that these three women performed on, and also was the main instrument that they (and most female composers in the past) composed for. In several songs, the lyrics also touch upon the theme of identity. For example, in “Dearest” the chosen text fragments often highlight Virginia Woolf’s loss of identity as a result of her madness. The importance of Woolf’s writing to her sense of identity is revealed when she sings words such as: “I can’t even write,” “can’t concentrate,” and “everything I am has gone.” I have deliberately chosen not to portray the characters in Conversations with Silence in depth, or give them a detailed personal history. In fact, most remain anonymous. I made this decision because so many women artists in history are anonymous. Virginia Woolf speculates that “I would venture to guess that Anon, who wrote so many poems without signing them, was often a woman.”38 One is not allowed to know many of the characters in my work. “Lingering” is an example of a song where I do not reveal anything tangible about the character who sings. The identity of the voice in “Breathe”, and in the reprise of  38  Woolf, A Room of One’s Own, 51.  35  this song, is purposefully ambiguous: Who is she? Where is she? Who does she sing to? I want the audience to ask themselves these questions in their uncertainty. Perhaps the clearest example of how I have incorporated the theme of identity in Conversations with Silence is in the excerpt I have chosen from Linda Catlin Smith’s essay “What is a Woman Composer,”39 which is heard during Interlude Four. Smith discusses the role that gender plays in determining her identity as a composer. She lists some of the factors in her life that she believes have influenced her work, including where she grew up, what she listens to, what art she likes, and what she read growing up. I included this excerpt because I believe that all artists have a unique blend of influences that feed their work, and gender is only one of these. As Smith’s text continues, a touch of anger is revealed in her words: A woman composer is a dancing dog, she is the moon, but one which shines with her own light, the eagle which must soar; I neither want entrance into the club, nor do I want to form a new club.  I want to change the club. I want to see those apples rolling all over the floor.40 In this excerpt Smith’s “dancing dog” is a reference to the following passage from Virginia Woolf’s A Room of One’s Own: And here, I said, opening a book about music, we have the very words again in this year of grace, 1928, of women who try to write music. “Of Mlle Germaine Tailleferre one can only repeat Dr. Johnson’s dictum concerning a woman preacher, transposed into terms of music. ‘Sir, a woman’s composing is like a dog’s walking on his hind legs. It is not done well, but you are surprised to find it done at all.’” So accurately does history repeat itself.41  39  See Musical Score, 208.  Linda Catlin Smith, “Composing Identity: What is a woman composer?” Paper presented at the University of Victoria, November 1, 1997. 40  41  Woolf, A Room, 71.  36  3.3 Isolation While today there is a recognizable community of female composers42, even in the very recent past this wasn’t the case. Most women who wrote music did so in isolation from each other. The few women who receive mention in music history texts are separated by space and time. Until the 20th Century, there was never a female community of composers. To highlight the theme of isolation in Conversations with Silence I have chosen to use a single vocal performer. All the female characters in the piece are alone, with the exception of the mother in “Lullaby” who sings to her child. The first and last songs, “Eve” and “Linger”, are written for voice alone, without instrumental or electronic accompaniments, further emphasizing the theme of isolation. Many song lyrics also explore this theme: the old woman who sings “The Scarf” has filled her loneliness with obsessive knitting; the mother in “Lullaby” feels trapped, alone in the nursery; Virginia Woolf in “Dearest” feels cut off from the rest of the world by her madness.  3.4 Communication Communicating the stories of women, both real and imagined, was one of my central priorities when planning this work. My desire to create a theatre piece instead of a concert work came from my belief that theatre and music complement each other, and together would communicate my ideas more clearly than either one alone. When women write, maintains Eva Rieger, “they write music that can be played, performed, and understood and the contact to the audience is of primary concern to many of them.”43 When I began composing the lyrics and songs to be used in this piece, I first wrote texts that were less character-based, and more closely drawn from the theory and feminist texts I was reading. However, I soon realized that my message would reach the audience on a more personal level, and more fully express my feelings about the subject, if I told it through stories and characters. 42 One strong example of a visible community of female composers is the International Alliance for Women in Music (IAWM) http://www.iawm.org/ (accessed July 16, 2009). 43  Rieger, “I Recycle Sounds”, 149.  37  This character-driven approach has allowed me to explore feminist themes in a more nuanced, less didactic way. I want the audience to understand the ideas within this work, but my delivery method is not always direct. I often skate on the line between abstract and concrete messages; however, the underlying themes are always present.  3.5 Connection to the Body The female perspective on women’s bodies and female sexuality has historically been almost absent from art. Susan McClary writes: “The tendency to deny the body and to identify with pure mind underlies virtually every aspect of patriarchal Western culture.”44 From the beginning, I have felt it important for Conversations with Silence to involve the female body. Theatre, texts, and sounds are all used to put the audience more in touch with their senses, their physicality, and their connection to their bodies. Many of the lyrics and texts in my thesis work include references to the body from a woman’s point of view. The two clearest examples are “Linger” and “Eve.” Both of these pieces are sexual and sensuous, qualities that I will further discuss in Chapter Four. “Breathe” is a slow song with repetitious lyrics inviting the listener to breathe: “breathe slowly/silently slowly.” Breathing is, of course, one of our most basic bodily needs, essential to life. One intention of this song is to draw the audience’s attention to their own breathing, a technique often used in different forms of meditation to relax our bodies and focus our minds on the present. Another example of how I connect this work to the female body is found in the four interludes, which are composed in part from abstract sounds made by my female voice. Often these sounds are intimate and emotional. They are sounds I link with bodily emotions—sex, pleasure, anger, and fear.  44  McClary, Feminine Endings, 54.  38  3.6 Preference for Functional Music Two of the songs in Conversations with Silence create characters of ordinary women in domestic situations. These two songs are also functional, each tied to a type of “women’s work.” The first of these songs is a lullaby. A mother is singing to her child, “Hush-a-bye baby, it’s time to sleep.” Like most lullabies the music is calm, simple and soothing; however, the lyrics provide a contrast to the music and describe a woman who feels trapped by the walls of the nursery. The second song is “The Scarf,” a knitting song, inspired by a long tradition of knitting, weaving, and spinning songs – songs that are sung to accompany the repetitive actions involved in these arts. Interestingly, knitting—an art form that has long been the territory of women—is also an example of functional art. I chose the topic of knitting for this song because knitting has become an essential part of my life over the past ten years. Dr. Debbie Stoller, who is editor-in-chief of the feminist magazine BUST, is also an avid knitter and has published the popular Stitch ’n Bitch series of knitting books. In the introduction to The Knitter’s Handbook, she discusses how knitting fits in with her feminist ideals: And that’s when it dawned on me: All those people who looked down on knitting—and housework, and housewives—were not being feminist at all. In fact, they were being anti-feminist, since they seemed to think that only those things that men did, or had done, were worthwhile. […] Why couldn’t we all—women and men alike—take pride in the work our mothers had always done as we did in the work of our fathers?45 “The Scarf” is sung by an old woman who has very little in the world. Although her character and her place in time are vague, it is clear that she has very little control over her existence. At the end of each day she returns to her scarf, she knits, and she sings. The words of the chorus create the pattern for the scarf she is knitting: “knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl.” While there is an abundance of art about supposedly “universal” topics that historically have been entirely male domains (for example: war, hunting, exploration, sport, and the  45  Debbie Stoller, Stich ‘n Bitch: The Knitter’s Handbook (New York: Workman Publishing, 2003), 7.  39  courting of women) there is far less art about the lives of women, from the perspectives of women. These two songs examine two typical aspects from women’s lives.  3.7 Lineage and Canon I conclude this chapter with a discussion of creative lineage and the musical canon. When I began to listen to, read about, and study the music of women, both past and present, I was aware that none of this music is part of the standard canon of Western Classical Music. This awareness led to certain questions: How is the canon created? In whose interests do canons operate? What gets included and why? And what criteria are used to decide what is great art? For the most part the standard “masterworks” in music only represent a small selection of pieces and composers. The canon tends to omit works that don’t match a certain profile, and music that is “other” is usually excluded. Many women have written on this subject, including Sally McArthur who writes: The male dominance of the canon, coupled with the dominance of music theory by analysts who have sought to explain greatness in music according to what I call male models, including analytical methods such as that of Schenker, where the notion of the ideal is implied and seems to correspond to a male sexual metaphor, has led to what feminist musicologists have suggested is an unbalanced view.46 In writing Conversations with Silence, I hope to address this imbalance. Simply by choosing to emphasize the musical qualities mentioned in this chapter, such as using static harmonies and alternatives to the typical climax, I am stressing that there can be great musical value found outside of the models in our masculine-dominated canon. As mentioned above, I have integrated several musical quotations by female composers into Conversations with Silence. Searching for and placing these quotations into my thesis composition has increased my awareness of female composers from the past. I admit that my knowledge of women’s creative contribution to Western Music was, and still remains, relatively limited. My hope is that by incorporating these women into my work, the listening audience will become more aware of these female composers, and perhaps even wish to hear more of their music.  46  Macarthur, Feminine Endings, 71.  40  I feel that by using other woman’s work as a source for musical material in my own work, I am honouring them. As Virginia Woolf states in A Room of One’s Own: “We think back through our mothers if we are women.”47 I believe that this assertion can easily be applied to the arts. All the women who composed music before me have opened the door a little wider, finally allowing female composers today to be received among their male peers. I end this chapter with a quotation (appropriately by an anonymous author) from The Ecstacy of Influence, an essay from the Norton Anthology of Literature by Women: It is said that male writers suffer from “the agony of influence” when they contemplate famous male writers’ contributions to the western literary canon. Yet for women writers, finding lost literary foremothers has often been an empowering experience, allowing the woman writer to not feel so alone in her literary aspirations. Women writers often sought to celebrate their literary foremother’s work, to pay homage to what that writer’s work or mentorship has meant to their own literary endeavors.48  47  Woolf, A Room of One’s Own, 99.  48  http://www.wwnorton.com/college/english/nalw/topics/top4,overview.aspx no author (accessed  March 26)  41  Chapter 4 – Materials: Scene by Scene But how could I on the one hand be a woman, and on the other, a writer? Only those who are still in a state of verbal automatism or who mimic already existing meaning can maintain such a scission or split between she who is a woman and she who writes. – Luce Irigaray49  4.1 Scene One 4.1.1 “Eve” Conversations with Silence begins with “Eve”, a song for solo voice. The text for this song is from a poem also titled “Eve”, by Canadian poet Dorothy Livesay. The story of Eve, the first woman, “curious, gullible to temptation, responsible for our expulsion from Eden, and the cause of mortality and original sin,”50 has long fascinated female writers. Livesay’s Eve is a contemporary woman who experiences a powerful awakening with her bite of the apple. Her senses are aroused and she discovers her identity using smell, taste, touch, and sight. The sensuality of Livesay’s poem is well suited to the mezzo-soprano voice. To emphasize the connection to the body this song is written for the rich low end of the mezzo-soprano vocal range and includes effects like slow glissandi and breathy tones at some phrase endings (see Figure 2 and Figure 3). Throughout the poem, Livesay’s Eve is searching for a stronger sense of her identity. This search is reflected in the music. At first, revelling in the scent of her apple, she sings a melody that wanders chromatically, never settling on any particular pitch centre for very long. In the first half of the song, I have frequently used the tritone, also known as diabolus in musica, to symbolize the dangerous power in the apple. The tritone, especially when sung, is both uncomfortable and alluring. The repeated use of this interval creates a strong feeling of harmonic instability in this song. As Reginald Smith Brindle comments: “Any  49 Luce Irigaray, “Writing as a Woman,” in je, tu, nous: Toward a Culture of Difference, trans. Alison Martin (New York and London: Routledge, 1993 ), 53.  50 http://www.wwnorton.com/college/english/nalw/topics/top2,overview.aspx (accessed March 20, 2009) no author.  42  tendency for a tonality to emerge may be avoided by introducing a note three whole tones distant from the key note of that tonality.”51 A sketch outlining the melodic structure is shown below.  Figure 1 – Harmonic Outline of “Eve” As shown in Figure 1 and Figure 2, the opening phrase of the song outlines a tritone between D-Ab and C-Gb. The tritone found in the second phrase is more hidden, between the opening C and the final Gb. This phrase also contains a major second and a major seventh (here notated as a diminished octave). As will be shown, these intervals, along with the tritone, occur regularly in the melodies heard throughout Conversations with Silence.  Figure 2 – First Three Measures of “Eve”  51  Reginald Smith Brindle, Serial Composition (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1966), 66.  43  As the song continues, Eve becomes more powerful. This change is reflected in the underlying structure of the melody, which becomes more consonant and diatonic. Beginning in measure 9, the lines “that spurting juice earth sweet/in fifty seconds fifty summers sweep and shake me,” become solidly centred around C and then D. However, I end both phrases a semitone below their relative pitch centres to prevent either of them from sounding too settled (see Figure 3).  Figure 3 – Example of Diatonic Sections in “Eve” In the beginning of the song, I also use the rhythm to contribute to the unsettled mood by avoiding any impression of regular pulse or metre. There is very little rhythmic repetition throughout the song, and by frequently using ties held over bar lines and beats, subtle shifts in tempo, and duple rhythms mixed with triplets I have created a mood of restlessness. However, just as the intervallic patterns of the melody change with the development of the character, so does the rhythm. Note the contrast in rhythms between measures 1 and 2, and measures 11 and 12 (shown in Figure 2 and Figure 3). Rhythmically, the section starting in measure 11 marks a change. The steady eighth notes clearly stand out, and bring a brief moment of rhythmic constancy. This steady rhythm, in combination with the relative harmonic stability of this section, creates an effective buildup to the climax that follows. The climax of this song occurs at the typical location, about three quarters of the way through the song, in measures 13 and 14, with the phrase, “I am alive, alive” (see Figure 4). The repetition of the word “alive” gives additional emotional weight to this phrase, and is the only alteration I made to the original poem. The sense of climax is further achieved with a sudden and dramatic rise to the highest and loudest notes of the song. As  44  shown, the phrase expands from a Bb until it lands surprisingly on a high E (highlighting another tritone). Although this is the high point in the song, the tritone in the structure of this phrase creates an unsettled feeling in the music.  Figure 4 – Climax of “Eve” The apple returns at the end of the poem, and with it the music also returns to the chromatic and rhythmic uncertainty heard in the opening phrases (see Figure 5). As the outline above explains, the final phrase begins in what sounds like D minor, but ends a tritone away from this centre, on a final Ab. This ending is intentionally left unresolved.  Figure 5 – Final Measures of “Eve”  4.1.2 “Drift 1” / with Alma Schindler-Mahler “Drift 1” is a short piece for solo flute that is constructed using only four different multiphonic intervals, making it a good example of “restricted aesthetics,” (see Figure 6). Although the piece has only a few notes, and looks very sparse on the page, the unsteadiness of the long slow multiphonics provides a constantly changing surface. I also have asked the flute player to switch between playing with no vibrato and playing with vibrato, which provides another subtle change of colour within this seemingly static piece. By restricting the pitches I draw the listener’s attention towards the small differences in colour that result from the unstable nature of flute multiphonics. It is very difficult for a flutist to keep a multiphonic consistent over the length of a slow note, so the extended  45  length of each multiphonic has an inherent instability. Each quiet and fragile tone sounds beautifully balanced on the edge between sounding and not sounding.  Figure 6 – Multiphonics in “Drift 1” Fifteen seconds after the flute begins, a short quotation from Alma Schindler-Mahler’s Vier Lieder No. 3, Ansturm (bars 28 to 31), is heard quietly alongside the flute. The sound of the piano arrives like a spirit drifting out of the misty flute multiphonics. Although the audience will not recognize this musical quotation, my intention is that the rich tonal harmonies of this fragment will stand out as clearly belonging to another author, and another time. The brief quotation lasts only 15 seconds, leaving the flute to finish the movement. These two instruments are not intended to be synchronized; they should play using independent tempi.  4.1.3 Interlude 1 This is the first in a series of four interludes that appear between each change of scene in Conversations with Silence. All of the interludes are composed entirely from recorded samples. This genre of electroacoustic music is commonly known by the French term musique concrète, which is defined by Grove Music Online as containing sound materials taken from “pre-existing recordings (including instrumental and vocal music) and recordings made specially, whether of the environment or with instruments and objects in front of a studio microphone. These source sounds might then be subjected to treatments before being combined in a structure.”52 Many of the interludes share the same samples,  52 Simon Emmerson and Denis Smalley. "Electro-acoustic music." In Grove Music Online. Oxford Music Online, http://www.oxfordmusiconline.com/subscriber/article/grove/music/08695 (accessed July 28, 2009).  46  although each is unique in its construction. All the interludes are composed for 4channels. Interlude One begins with a long sample of flute multiphonics from “Drift 1”. This sample is processed using a granulator and runs continuously through the entire duration of the interlude, moving in a circle around the four speakers. A variety of breath sounds are heard intermittently, randomly moving around the four different channels. At the mid point of the interlude a vocal sample taken from an improvisation performed by CURV is heard twice, quietly in the background, underneath the louder layer of the flute. When the voices enter the breath sounds stop, and Interlude One ends with the sound of the processed flute sample fading gradually away.  4.2 Scene Two 4.2.1 “Breathe” As shown in Figure 7, “Breathe” begins gently with a low tri-chord in the piano combined with an extended pianissimo tremolo played by the bass drum. Then the percussionist bows a large suspended cymbal, and the flute and clarinet join in with dissonant sustained notes. These opening sounds are repeated over and over throughout this movement, creating the minimalist and pointillist landscape that accompanies the vocal line in “Breathe”. The music is notated along a vague timeline instead of using a traditional metre, allowing for a more flexible interaction between the different instruments. The vocal line is prerecorded and is diffused from four speakers that surround the audience. The synchronization of the voice and the instrumental ensemble is intended to be loose, and the score used only as a guideline. The density of this movement is consistently quite sparse, but there is rarely any true silence because some sounds will resonate quietly through the spaces.  47  Figure 7 – Opening Page of “Breathe” Figure 8 shows a harmonic reduction of the instrumental parts for the whole movement. There is little harmonic change in this piece. The repeating tri-chord in the bass clef is an important element not only of “Breathe” and its reprise in Scene Three, but also in “Folding Inward”, in Scene Four, and “Folding Outward”, in Scene Five. In this movement the tri-chord is heard nine times. Each entry of this low, distinctive trichord signals the start of a new phrase. The flute, clarinet and percussion react by decorating the sustained notes of the piano. Other harmonic repetitions are also shown in Figure 8. Most obvious is the G#-F-A sequence (shown below as beamed notes in the middle voice) that is repeated three times.  48  Figure 8 – Harmonic Outline of “Breathe” Above the static harmonic base, there are two lines that create clear linear movement throughout “Breathe”. The first begins on a high Bb and moves gradually down to an F# and then rises more quickly to end on an A. The other line (comprised of the first trebleclef notes in each measure of Figure 8) moves between E, Eb, and D. The vocal part is heard through the speakers quietly overtop of the ensemble. The recorded voice sings both to the character on stage (at this point, a mother who is rocking her baby in a cradle), and to the audience. “Breathe/ Silently now/ Be still silently/ Don’t move/ Listen.” These short phrases are part of a longer song that is heard at the end of Scene Three in the “Breathe” reprise. The physical separation of the recorded voice from the more tangible music coming from the stage accentuates the otherworldly nature of this song. I want the audience to question whose voice is it, and where it comes from? The vocal part is further separated from the live instrumental music by inhabiting a distinctive harmonic and rhythmic language. In fact, I composed the accompaniment and the vocal melody separately, and decided to layer them together only while assembling the complete composition.  4.2.2 “Lullaby” The second character song of the work is a lullaby. This lullaby is a simple song, and provides an intimate setting of the text. The cello accompanies the voice throughout the song, and the clarinet joins the duo in the final chorus. Towards the end of the song, the clarinet plays a lyrical descant to the vocal line. In many ways “Lullaby” imitates traditional lullabies with its conventional form (moving regularly between verse and  49  chorus) and modal melodies. However, the song also contains unusual elements such as uneven phrase lengths, asymmetrical rhythms, and occasional unexpected harmonies. The character who sings this song is a new mother singing to her baby. She begins as if this is a typical lullaby: “Hush-a-bye baby/ it’s time now to sleep.” In the three verses, the mother imagines her child’s cries, secrets, and dreams being carried away by the wind and the clouds: first “tickling the grass” in the garden, then travelling “to the tops of the trees,” and finally flying “with the clouds across the sea”.  Figure 9 – Harmonic Outline of “Lullaby” Verses The opening melody is simple and, as shown in Figure 9, is written in C major. However, there is sadness heard in the cello accompaniment, which uses the E phrygian mode. In measure 8 there is surprise when the melody goes to Ab. The cello accompaniment in this measure creates a diminished seventh chord. The cello continues to the end of the verse in the Phrygian mode, but the voice goes first to F minor (or F Aeolian), and then finally transitioning to the Phrygian mode through a tritone heard at the end of measure ten. All three verses follow the same harmonic map. Figure 10 gives a sample from the opening of verse two.  Figure 10 – Excerpt from Verse Two in “Lullaby”  50  In the verses the gentle cello accompaniment is performed entirely pizzicato. A subtle sense of yearning inhabits the cello part, because the line is constantly reaching upwards and outwards from the E where it begins. With each phrase the line rises a little higher, but it isn’t until the very end of the verse that a full octave above is finally reached (see Figure 11). When the octave is finally heard, it feels like a small piece of freedom has been attained, but the controlled atmosphere of this song is revealed when one observes that it takes 14 measures of music for the cello to span an octave.  Figure 11 – Excerpt from End of Verse One in “Lullaby” In the choruses the mother focuses more on herself, beginning each chorus with: “But I will stay, here with you”. As the mother’s dreams for her child become increasingly expansive, the contrast to her confinement in the nursery becomes more apparent. When she sings her voice travels only as far as the window, ceiling, and walls of the nursery. In contrast with the verses, the music in the choruses is more repetitive both rhythmically and melodically. Both the cello and the voice are written in the A Phrygian mode. The cello now uses the bow to play deep and repetitive oscillations underneath the voice, creating a musical image of the music as the mother’s cage. The voice ends the chorus by singing a diminished triad (see measures 23-25 in Figure 12).  51  Figure 12 – First Chorus in “Lullaby”  There is a small coda at the end, when the song returns to the words and music of the opening: “Hush-a-bye baby”. However, there is a sudden change, and the final words reveal what has been unspoken until this point. On a rising F minor chord the mother sings: “hush-a-bye me”.  Figure 13 – Final Measures of “Lullaby”  52  4.2.3 Fragment from “Unravel” At the end of “Lullaby”, I have included a short section taken from the end of “Unravel”, which is heard later in Scene Three, to create a transition into Interlude Two. This fragment also appears at the end of Scene Four, again as a transition into the subsequent Interlude. This fragment, written for piccolo, glockenspiel, and piano, is stated exactly as it appears in “Unravel”.  4.2.4 Interlude Two The second interlude, like the first, has a processed sample running through the length of the piece. This continuous sample is a machine-like sound that remains static throughout its duration, with the exception of subtle volume and pitch fluctuations that occur in a continuous pattern. Two dissonant flute samples, multiphonics again sampled from “Drift 1”, enter the foreground of the interlude, randomly overlapping. A distorted voice enters half way through humming a simple, yet haunting, melody. Another voice enters, echoing the first, and then another, creating a blurred chorus. The other samples fade leaving a single humming voice to end the interlude.  4.3 Scene Three 4.3.1 “Unravel” “Unravel” is an homage to Clara Wieck Schumann. The entire movement is derived from Schumann’s Notturno, Op. 6, No. 2, for solo piano. Clara Schumann’s musical material influenced this movement in several different ways: first, the form is shaped around the textural changes found in Clara’s Notturno; second, the underlying harmonic structure is heavily borrowed from the harmonic progressions in the Notturno; and third, I have included four quotations taken directly from Clara Schumann’s piece. While this piece is performed, excerpts from Clara Schumann’s Diary are projected onto the stage.53 The projections add insight into Clara Schumann as a composer.  53  See Musical Score, 119.  53  The title of this movement refers to different kinds of disentanglement: by focusing on a female composer, I am subtly challenging the foundations that have formed our definitions of musical greatness; by weaving elements of Clara’s work into mine I am dissecting and unraveling her music; and as the piece progresses the original musical gestures become more and more untied. I specifically chose the word “unravel” over words like “loosen” or “untangle”, because it is a term commonly used by knitters when they are pulling apart a piece of knitting. This association also creates a link to “The Scarf”, which is heard in Scene Four. This movement opens with a pattern of intersecting lines in the piano, cello and percussion. These patterns create a sense of interwoven rhythms. Although similar patterns repeat within each bar, the metre changes every two bars, alternating between 3/4 and 4/4. The fluctuating metre causes the piece to feel gently unbalanced. The changes occur at regular intervals, so a soothing, rocking feeling is the result (see Figure 15). Schumann’s piece is written in 6/8, so the metre shifts I use change the rhythms in the music I have borrowed.  Figure 14 – Harmonic Comparison of “Unravel” and Notturno Figure 14 shows how the harmonies in the left hand of Schumann’s Notturno were used in “Unravel”. The chord progression used in the first section of “Unravel” (measures 1 to 24) matches the progression Schumann used in her first six measures. The only exception is the addition of a constant D repeated throughout the first section of “Unravel”. Figure 15 below shows the opening measures of “Unravel” and is a good illustration of how Schumann’s harmonies were used.  54  Figure 15 – Opening Measures of “Unravel” Gradually, instruments are added onto the harmonic foundation. First the right hand of the piano enters, then the clarinet, and finally the flute. The texture builds in density and tension until measures 19 to 24, the first climax of the piece (see Figure 16). Suddenly the music stops, and out of the silence a brief quotation from Clara’s Notturno emerges on the piano (see Figure 17).  55  Figure 16 – First Climax of “Unravel”  Figure 17 – First Schumann Quotation in “Unravel” Throughout “Unravel” there are four quotations taken from Schumann’s Notturno. Just like the excerpt from Alma Mahler’s Vier Lieder heard in Scene One, these quotations are 56  meant to stand out from the musical context, evoking a strong impression of an earlier era, and revealing a small piece of who Clara Schumann, the composer, was.  Figure 18 – Measures 29-33 of “Unravel” In measures 28-33 the opening pattern returns, although here it is more subdued than where it left off before the quotation in measure 24 (see Figure 18). The rhythms of the different instrumental lines continue to weave around each other, but now the texture is more homogeneous. The flute is rhythmically synchronized with the left hand of the piano, and the clarinet in sync with the right hand. The result is a steady pulse of eighth notes, but each instrument accents a different part of the metre. Once again, this texture ends suddenly, and a second quotation is played by the piano, followed briefly by solo cello.  57  Figure 19 – Measures 40-44 of “Unravel”  Figure 20 – Corresponding Harmonies from Schumann’s Notturno The next section of “Unravel”, measures 40 to 46, brings a drastic textural change. This section was inspired by the oscillating eighth note pattern found in measures 19 to 24 of Clara Schumann’s Notturno. I have also used Schumann’s harmonic progression from the same measures (excerpt from Notturno shown in Figure 20). I transformed the material by transposing it up several octaves. Although the notes are the same, I also imposed constant metre changes onto Schumann’s unvarying rhythmic repetition. The glockenspiel  58  and piccolo, playing in unison, add a layer of shifting accents over top of the piano, which provides the harmonic and melodic foundation (see Figure 19).  Figure 21 – Lead up to Second Climax of “Unravel” In measure 46, the opening pattern returns again, but now the individual instrumental parts begin to unravel. The clarinet plays increasingly unstable rhythms, the piccolo bends the pitch of many notes, the cello line has added glissandi, and towards the end of this section the piano and percussion enter with contrasting material that eventually overrides the strong rhythmic pulse that has been dominant in the movement until this point. This unraveling culminates with a second, and greater, climax that lasts from measures 56 to 61  59  (see Figure 21). As before, the music suddenly becomes silent, and a third quotation from the Notturno is quietly played by the piano. In measure 65, the unraveling continues, but just as measures 28 to 33 provided a sense of calm after the climax in 22 and 23, here the material also becomes less dense and active. Loose strands start to pull away from the interweaving of the rhythmic patterns. The flute line floats overtop, bending and swaying as if to its own pulse. The clarinet continues the rapid patterns from the previous section, but now the material is broken into fragments that trail off with irregular silences injected into what was previously a steady stream of sixteenth notes. The bass drum is notably absent, and in its place the marimba provides a steady ostinato embellished with tremolo. At the end of this section the final quotation from Schumann’s piece is heard. The solo cello once again adds a tail to this quotation. The piano, piccolo, and glockenspiel return again with material similar to that found in measures 40 to 46. Again, this section borrows directly from the harmonic progression and rhythmic texture of Clara Schumann’s Notturno. In this final section the metre changes are even more frequent than before and vary more widely, ranging from 2/4 to 5/4. Measures of stillness are inserted between each changing chord of oscillating eighth notes. The piccolo and piano are sustained through these inserted measures, like broken threads left hanging.  60  Figure 22 – Final Measures of “Unravel”  4.3.2 “Dearest” The lyrics for “Dearest” were created using text fragments from the letter Virginia Woolf left for her husband before she drowned herself in 1941.54 The character portrayed by the singer is Virginia Woolf on the verge of suicide. The song begins with the sounds of rushing water gradually fading in, and then remaining constant throughout the song. Virginia stands singing beside the river that will eventually take her life. The character’s failing mental state is depicted by fragmentation and repetition in the words and music that increase throughout the three verses of the song. Quiet whispering voices, echoing the sung lyrics, emerge from the water sounds. At 54 A copy of the complete text of the letter can be found at: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virginia_Woolf#Death (accessed April, 2009).  61  first these voices are intermittent, but their frequency and urgency increase until at the end they are constant, suggesting the depth of her insanity. “Dearest” begins with the longest verse, followed by two verses, each one shorter than the last: the first verse is 26 measures; the second is 14 measures; and the last verse only 10. In the verses, the vocal line is composed in a recitative style. The melodic rhythm follows the cadence of the words and has a wandering sense of pulse. The non-repetitive, stuttering nature of the rhythms creates a dragging quality in the song. Like “Eve”, the song is filled with tritones and chromatic movement, and avoids resting on any pitch centre for long.  Figure 23 – Vocal Line, Measures 9-12 in “Dearest”  In measure 10 (see Figure 23) the melody moves from G to A to Gb, a major second, followed by an augmented second. The chromatic slide from the G to Gb within this phrase is a good example of a pattern found throughout this song. In measure 11, the repetition of the word “dearest” is emphasized in the music with a repetition of the opening major second found in measure 10. However, with the words “I shant” there is a sudden descent down a tritone. Several tritones can be seen in the examples above and below. In measure 12 (see Figure 23), the line ends with a tritone sounding between the Bb and the E, a further sign of the character’s fading sanity. In Figure 24 tritones are heard in measure 22 and again between measures 23 and 24. The vocal line outlines a diminished triad in measures 52-53 (see Figure 25) and the phrase ends with a tritone.  62  Figure 24 – Vocal Line in Measures 21-24 in “Dearest”  Figure 25 – Vocal Line in Measures 52-56 in “Dearest”  Figures 24 and 25 show excerpts of the vocal line taken first from verse one and secondly from verse three. The distance between these two examples illustrates some of the subtle changes that occur in the vocal part as the song progresses. The second example shows more repetition, and longer spaces between the repeated words, as if each word is a struggle for the singer to produce. The line moves more slowly as the length of each word is stretched. The vocal tessitura range also gradually shifts lower throughout each verse. In the first example above, some of the repetition and fragmentation is already evident. In measures 22 and 23 the word “again” repeats three times, and each time is a semitone lower. In measure 54, shown in Figure 25, I also connect the repetition of “again” to a falling chromatic scale, further emphasizing the break from any ties to tonality.  63  Figure 26 – Opening Measures of “Dearest”  As shown in Figure 26, the alto flute, bass clarinet, and right hand of the piano join the texture of the water with rippling notes that relentlessly weave around the same threenote cluster. All three instruments play an independent, yet similar, rhythmic pattern combining eighth and sixteenth notes. These lines intersect and overlap. Hovering right below the pitch range of the voice, this accompaniment quietly murmurs like the stream that Virginia stands in. Pitch bends are added to the flute and clarinet lines to accentuate the sense of blurring and blending. Underneath these layers, the left hand of the piano plays heavy clusters built out of the notes used in the vocal line. The rhythm of the clusters follows the stronger accents of the vocal line, and likewise is rhythmically irregular. As the piece progresses these clusters  64  sink lower and lower in pitch, finally ending with a soft, yet dense, cluster on the lowest piano notes (see Figure 27).  Figure 27 – Piano Clusters in Verse Three of “Dearest” A soft strike on a large suspended cymbal punctuates the end of each vocal phrase. As the piece continues and phrases become more fragmented, this punctuation becomes less and less frequent. A quiet ostinato is played on a snare drum towards the end of each verse. As the only rhythmically consistent layer in the entire song, this ostinato suggests a steady clock ticking ever closer to the character’s final moments (see Figure 28).  Figure 28 – Snare Drum Ostinato in “Dearest” A short chorus returns three times throughout the song, at the end of each verse. A rising gesture in the flute signals the change, and the other instruments fade away as the chorus begins. Here Virginia sings, almost lovingly, to the water that will take her life. The voice moves slightly higher and is accompanied only by the flute and bowed vibraphone, adding a dreamlike shimmer to this song that welcomes her death. Both instruments now are pitched above the voice, which provides another contrast to the dense, low sonorities heard in the verses. As can be seen below in Figure 29, the vocal line is more lyrical and rhythmically repetitive. The melody begins in A minor, and ends in E minor.  65  Figure 29 – Final Chorus of “Dearest” At the end of the piece, the singer walks off the stage as she sings the final chorus. Silence is held and the vibraphone continues playing quiet sustained B’s every five seconds. The vibraphone continues throughout the reprise of “Breathe.”  4.3.3 “Breathe Reprise” Here “Breathe” returns, this time with the vocal part sung live, but from off-stage. The entire song is heard in the reprise, whereas in the earlier version of “Breathe” only fragments of the melody were used. Another major change is that now the accompaniment is performed only by the piano, creating a sparser texture. Although the piano chords hang in the air for a long time after they are played, there is more silence in the reprise because of the large durations between notes. The wide gaps of silence surrounding the voice emphasize the message in the words even further. Again, the identity of the voice is intentionally ambiguous—is this Virginia’s ghost, or an otherworldly voice bringing a moment of peace and reflection? Does this voice reflect the past, or look to the future? Is the voice singing to the audience or to the characters on stage? The continued repetition of the vibraphone note throughout “Breathe Reprise”  66  certainly ties these two songs together, but I invite a variety of interpretations to this moment.  Figure 30 – Opening of “Breathe Reprise”  This reprise will trigger a memory of the initial setting heard only one scene earlier. The accompaniment is a near variation of the first version, and in fact opens with the same trichord (compare Figure 7 and Figure 30). Similar pitches, chords and gestures are used all the way through, but the music is given a more lyrical feel and is often decorated with grace notes (see Figure 31). The repetitive vocal part is composed of long sustained phrases. The entire melody is composed using only 5 notes: B, C#, E, F#, and A (with the exception of one G and one G# that appear in the first two lines of the song). B functions as the pitch centre throughout the song, and both starts and ends the vocal part. There are two short verses separated by a chorus that is repeated twice. Verse one is: “breathe silently now/ be still silently/ don’t move listen”, and verse two is: “with silent breath/ be still slowly/ slowly breathe.” The words in the chorus are: “breathe still/ breathe slowly/ silently slowly.” Obviously, the words used are quite minimal, with many repetitions of “breathe,” “silently,” and “still.” The shape of the music closely follows the shape of the words. When the words repeat, often the musical gesture does as well.  67  Figure 31 –Grace Notes in “Breathe Reprise”  The melody is filled with large leaps, both upward and downward, to give a sense of space and openness. The opening notes of the melody, as seen in Figure 30 above, include two upward major seventh leaps. The same interval can be seen in Figure 31, with the first two syllables of “silently.”  Figure 32 – Ending of “Breathe” Reprise The final phrase of the song (see Figure 32) includes another large leap, up a major ninth, but the C# resolves down to the B, providing a feeling of resolution at the end. This sense of  68  resolution in the vocal part is undermined, however, by the harmonies in the piano, which trails off with unattached grace notes that create a loose strand left hanging in the air.  4.3.4 Interlude Three The third interlude begins with intermittent breath sounds that randomly move around the four channels. A processed sample of a long exhalation gradually fades in, creating a continuous layer that contrasts with the irregular spacing of the breaths. This constant layer, like the breath samples, also moves randomly among the four channels. A quiet echo of the humming heard in Interlude 2 adds another layer. A vocal fragment, again taken from a CURV vocal improvisation, layered with a mechanical pulse repeats twice gradually building in intensity. The breath samples increase in frequency and volume. A second, more expressive, vocal sample enters creating the climax of Interlude Three. The breath sounds gradually become less frequent and a final repetition of the humming finishes interlude.  4.4 Scene Four 4.4.1 “Folding Inward” “Folding Inward” is written for flute, clarinet, piano, and cello. The conceptual shape of this movement is a large wedge, or spiral, which starts at the wide end and gradually moves towards a narrow centre. I chose this shape to symbolize the small, mostly domestic, sphere of women’s lives in the past. With the exception of weddings, births, and funerals, each day would follow similar patterns, week after week, year after year. Over the course of their lives, women would closely observe subtle changes and create their adventures close to home. Their home life would always be at the centre, with everything else revolving around it. These ideas are translated into musical sounds through a gradual narrowing of the pitches, dynamics, and registers of the instrumental lines. Time also contributes to the sense of winding down. The end becomes closer, the piece becomes less dense and gestures are stretched. Gradually each instrumental line diminishes, until the piece finally ends quietly on a single pitch. However, the journey to the centre is not a straight line.  69  Instead of moving predictably, the changes in the register and dynamics continue to fluctuate quite widely as the piece closes towards its core.  Figure 33 – Examples of Foundational Trichord from “Folding Inward”  Figure 34 – Opening Measures of “Folding Inward” One of the main building blocks of this movement is the same tri-chord that was an important element in “Breathe” and its reprise. Shown above in Figure 33 are three examples, taken from different sections of the piece, which show some of the ways I use 70  the tri-chord in “Folding Inward”. The tri-chord is the opening sound of this movement, as seen in the opening six measures (Figure 34, just as it was with both versions of “Breathe”. By this point in Conversations with Silence, the tri-chord should be a recognizable link to the earlier movements. The upper B/C# interval of the tri-chord has a strong presence throughout the movement, and creates an inner harmonic focus for the piece, representative of the home. Sounding throughout the entire movement, this interval lies at the centre of every phrase. Its importance is heightened further because of the minimal harmonic variation in the movement. As the piece progresses, the constant return of the B/C# amidst a fairly static harmonic palette creates the feeling that this interval is the central focus of the narrowing form of the music. Again, restraint is a theme. Long, still chords are sustained in the ensemble. Subtle textural changes occur with quiet repeated notes that sound like gradually diminishing echoes. Every so often a melodic flourish breaks free from the restrained texture and in a panicked flurry seems to struggle against the repetitious calmness (see Figure 35). However, the piece continues to close in, gradually getting quieter, stiller, more repetitive, and less harmonically diverse.  71  Figure 35 – Example of Melodic Flourish in “Folding Inward”  The ending of “Folding Inward”, shown below in Figure 36, is consumed by the B/C# interval heard so often throughout the movement. In measure 88, above a final melodic line in the cello, the clarinet and flute sustain the dyad, the flute entering a quarter note after the clarinet. The flute and cello repeat the interval in measure 90, the flute now entering an eighth note after the cello. In measure 91 the piano plays a B grace note before a sustained C#. The clarinet blends in with the final note, sustaining the C# quietly until the end of measure 93, and the end of the movement.  72  Figure 36 – Final Measures of “Folding Inward”  4.4.2 “The Scarf” During the interlude between Scenes Four and Five, the singer appears as a new character, now dressed as an old woman. Having entered the stage during “Folding Inward”, she sits throughout that movement in a rocking chair and begins knitting a red wool scarf. This scarf is extraordinarily long, approximately 30 to 40 feet, and spills all around her on the floor. In “The Scarf” there are four verses, and once again, a chorus follows each verse. Each verse begins with a delicate accompaniment played by the full instrumental ensemble. The piano plays an agitated, but quiet, line of sixteenth and eighth notes in a pattern that repeats over and over. The repetition of this pattern is slightly obscured, however, because the pattern is 13 and a half beats long, so that each repetition begins in a new position within the metre. This pattern is shown in Figure 37, and the start of the new  73  cycle within the repeating pattern is shown at the *. A quiet woodblock ticks a steady stream of eighth notes throughout each verse. The marimba, cello, piccolo, and clarinet join in one at a time, playing short sections in unison with the piano. The notes sound mechanical and never rise above pianissimo. To match the piano, the flute and clarinet notes are played non-legato, and the cello uses a light pizzicato.  Figure 37 – Sample of Repeating Pattern in “The Scarf”  The vocal line enters in measure seven, and begins to tell the story of this anonymous character. Throughout the song her identity remains a mystery, and she reveals very little about herself. This is the kind of woman that history has traditionally forgotten. In the first verse the words focus on the very tangible sensations of knitting—she feels the scratching of the wool twisting around her finger, and hears the needles gently clicking. Her attention is completely focused on her task. The chorus continues to focus on the physical actions of knitting. The words sung are, in fact, the actual pattern of stitches she is knitting: “knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl.” The steady repetition of these words throughout the song parallels the repeated action of knitting row after row of the same pattern. Her scarf has become absurdly long, but, infatuated by the feeling of creating something that is her own, she continues adding line after line, unable to stop. This character represents all the women with strong creative urges who were never able to develop them. In the chorus, the music changes significantly (see Figure 38). The vocal line, like the lyrics, is steady and repetitive. Each “knit” is matched with an eighth note and each “purl” is a quarter note or longer. The clarinet, piano, and cello have independent, yet rhythmically interlocking, lines that resemble the interweaving in “Unravel.” The piano  74  reinforces the rhythm of the vocal line, the clarinet plays oscillating eighth notes, and the cello plays a repeated rising line that always reaches upwards but never goes anywhere new. The harmony remains static throughout the chorus. The low A tremolo drone on the marimba reinforces this harmonic stasis.  Figure 38 – First Chorus in “The Scarf”  In verse two we learn more about the character’s life. Every day she repeats the same actions, “bending, scrubbing, washing, tucking.” Her whole life is like the endless scarf that she knits. Every day is the same; every line is the same. Another chorus reinforces these parallels. In the third verse, the old woman now sings to her scarf as if it is alive. In  75  her loneliness the scarf has become her companion. In the final and longest verse, her obsession is fully exposed. However, this obsession is controlled until the very end, where her true hunger for possession is revealed when she sings: “you are the only thing that’s mine/ all mine/ always mine.” The musical accompaniment for each verse becomes more spacious as sections of the repeating pattern are removed. Subtle repetitions of notes are added, and the instruments gradually move from complete unison to delicate variations of the central line on the piano. The result is somewhat like a frayed and overworked piece of yarn. By the end of “The Scarf” there is far more silence than notes. Figure 39 shows the same pattern of notes shown in Figure 37, now taken from the beginning of the third verse. Repeated notes as well as spaces have been added to the texture.  Figure 39 – Example of Silences in the Pattern in “The Scarf”  76  At the end of the song, the chorus repeats twice in a row. This repetition, added to the obvious exaggerated length of the scarf on the floor and the revelation of the old woman’s obsession, gives the impression that this song, and the knitting of the scarf, could continue indefinitely. The final words “turn over” indicate that she is about to begin a new line of knitting. No feeling of closure is heard in the music; instead a gradual fade out ends the piece (see Figure 40).  Figure 40 – Final Measures of “The Scarf”  77  4.4.3 Interlude Four Interlude Four begins with a processed sample of flute multiphonics taken from the final line of “Drift 2” (see Figure 41). This cyclic sample is repeated several times creating a slow pulse as the flute enters and fades. Sporadic breath sounds, now familiar from the other interludes, overlap with the multiphonics. A new vocal sample, again taken from the CURV improvisation, enters 45 seconds into the Interude. The sample repeats three more times, spread throughout the rest of the interlude. The vocal sample used in this interlude is lower in pitch, calmer, and richer in timber, than the CURV samples used in earlier interludes, beginning the emotional resolution that continues in Scene Five. Half way through Interlude Four, the initial flute sample fades away, and a slowly evolving collage of unprocessed flute samples and breath sounds create a meditative ending.  4.5 Scene 5 4.5.1 Drift 2 “Drift 2” begins with a repeat of the second half of “Drift 1,” and then continues with new material. Just as in “Drift 1,” the focus is on small differences in colour that result from the unstable nature of flute multiphonics. The repetition of this material brings a signal that the ending is coming, a sign that the cycle is repeating. “Drift 2” has a more definite ending than “Drift 1,” which left off mid-sentence. “Drift 2” concludes meditatively with a sustained multiphonic that repeats five times (see Figure 41).  Figure 41 – Final Multiphonic in “Drift 2”  Again, a short quotation enters alongside the flute. This time the quotation is from Fanny Mendelssohn’s Früling, and, like the quotation from Alma Mahler’s Ansturm, it is also played by the piano. The audience will most likely not recognize this quotation, but like 78  the other quotations, this fragment will stand out from the surrounding texture, sounding like music of another time and place. The piano will come and go within the flute piece, just as in “Drift 1”. Again, the two instruments are not synchronized, and play independently of one another.  4.5.2 “Lingering” “Lingering” also connects to the opening scene of Conversations with Silence, because like “Eve” it is a song for voice alone. Thematically, “Lingering” is also about an awakening, and is a richly sensuous song written for the low register of the mezzo-soprano voice. Although “Lingering” has far more repetition than “Eve,” the two songs resemble each other in the way their pitch centres constantly shift, giving the melodies of both songs a sense of freedom and insecurity. The text and the music for this song were composed concurrently. I attached musical motives to particular words before choosing the order of either words or music. My compositional process therefore necessitated finding a balance between the right word order and the musical phrases that would be formed by arranging the words in a particular way. I composed in this manner to force myself to consciously find an equilibrium between stasis and change. The materials are minimal throughout the song, but the way in which they interact with each other changes frequently. In Figure 42 and Figure 43 below, my compositional process can be seen clearly. The first example is from the opening of the song, and the second is taken from closer to the end. The same musical figures can be seen attached to the same words in several places. For example, the words “with your hands” appear three times in these two examples, and always fall on the pitches D, F, and E. The words “your hands” appear in Figure 42, and are also set to the same pitches. In Figure 44 I have used the phrase “I feel your hands,” and again, “your hands” is set with the pitches F and E. The phrase “you awaken me” also occurs once in Figure 42 and twice in Figure 43, both times set to exactly the same notes. In Figure 44 just the words “awaken me” are heard, but again the pitches are the same. Even though there is a significant amount of repetition, the order of the words is always changing, so the musical phrases also change continuously.  79  Figure 42 – Opening of “Lingering”  Figure 43 – Near the End of “Lingering” These examples also show places where I have allowed for nuanced variation. The phrase that varies the most throughout the song is “on my skin,” which is the most intimate phrase in the lyrics, and the most directly connected to the body of the singer. Above, in Figure 42 and Figure 43, two different musical settings of this text are shown, and below in Figure 45 is a third variation.  Figure 44 – Second Climax in “Lingering”  The dynamic range of the song is small. Mezzo piano is the loudest marking, and only occurs in two places, both of which form tender climaxes. The first climax is seen above in Figure 43 with the words “on my skin.” The second is shown below (see Figure 44) with  80  the words “I feel your hands.” Because the two climaxes are marked with the same dynamic level, and are of similar proportion, the second is not intended to sound dramatically stronger, but because of its later placement in the song, a certain hierarchy is created. The final phrases are shown below in Figure 45. No new material is introduced, and the final repetitions of the now familiar phrases reduce in volume to a triple-piano. When the song ends, one can imagine the character continuing to quietly sing to herself. Throughout this song, she has no thoughts outside of the feeling of her lover’s hands on her skin. The audience is held in the moment, as there is no development of character, and no developing narrative.  Figure 45 – Final Phrase of “Lingering”  4.5.3 “Folding Outward” The final movement of Conversations with Silence is written for the full ensemble. “Folding Outward”, as its name suggests, is musically related to “Folding Inward”, heard in Scene Four. Both movements begin with the same tri-chord (compare Figure 34 and Figure 46), which is an important building block not only in “Folding Inward” and “Folding Outward”, but also in “Breathe” and the “Breathe Reprise”. The materials and form of this movement were inspired by the following quotation, written by Emily Carr. A recorded voice speaking the following text is added to the instrumental texture. The voice is directed both at the character on stage, and at the audience, speaking to the artist in each of us.  81  Look at the earth crowded with growth, new and old bursting from their strong roots hidden in the silent, live ground, each seed according to its own kind expanding, bursting and pushing its way up towards the light and air … each one knowing what to do, each one demanding its own rights on the earth … So, artist, you too from the depths of your soul, … let your roots creep forth, gaining strength.55 The shape of this movement comes from the idea of letting one’s “roots creep forth … expanding, bursting and pushing.” The repetition of the opening tri-chord throughout the movement acts as a foundation, like the ground the roots are planted in. It is a place from which to grow.  Figure 46 – Opening Measures of “Folding Outward”  55  Emily Carr, Hundreds and Thousands, 56-57.  82  In Figure 46 the first five measures of the movement are shown. The repeated low A in the piano, combined with the bass drum roll, accentuates the sense of the depth of this foundation. The alto flute and bass clarinet, because of their deep, rich timbres, are used in this movement. The musical phrases respond to the low tri-chords by continuously reaching upwards and outwards during the movement. Although the base stays the same, the tendrils are constantly moving in new directions. In the six bars shown in the example above (see Figure 46), one can see the two principal forms this tri-chord takes within “Folding Outward”(seen in measure 1 and measure 5 above). From this example it is already clear how important the tri-chord is to the foundation of this movement. The opening form of the tri-chord appears 17 times throughout the movement, and the second form appears 8 times. Out of the movement’s 50 measures, the tri-chord appears in half of them. The repeated low A of the tri-chord is always placed on the downbeat, with the following dyad always placed on the second beat of the measure. This regularity give the movement a strong, slow pulse. However, the metre fluctuates unsystematically between 3/4 and 4/4. This gentle change causes a mild feeling of expansion and contraction, like subtle changes in breathing patterns. The piano plays a central role in this movement, and the other instruments surround the piano harmonies with repetitious reinforcement and decorative melodic fragments. The alto flute, bass clarinet, cello, and percussion instruments respond to the pulse of the piano chords by decorating, echoing, and trailing off in new directions. The example below (Figure 47) is a good demonstration of both the roles of the instruments and the types of gestures in this movement.  83  Figure 47 – Measures 20—23 of “Folding Outward”  In measure 20, the vibraphone echoes the B-G# interval in the right hand of the piano. In measures 20 and 21 the alto flute picks up the G# which I develop into an arch-shaped line. The bass clarinet picks up the B, which it then develops into a different arched line. The two lines end up on the interval B-C# in measure 23, sustaining the dyad previously played by the piano in measure 22, and echoed by the vibraphone in measure 23. There is also a feeling of otherworldliness to this movement, and therefore also to the ending of Conversations with Silence. The voice that speaks is mysterious, and because it comes from the speakers it comes from an unknown place. The voice has no identity, and no physical form. The percussion instruments I have chosen all contribute to the shimmering, mystical atmosphere: bowed crotales; notes from top of the piano range; and vibraphone tones played with the motor on.  84  Figure 48 – Final Measures of “Folding Outward”  As can be seen above in Figure 48, the ending is quiet, but expansive. During these final phrases, the stage lights begin to fade, leaving the final notes to sound in darkness. The low tri-chord is heard in both measure 45 and 46. The alto flute, bass clarinet, and bass drum add harmonic depth and reinforce the sustained notes of the piano. The left hand of the piano, joined by a bowed crotale, gently sounds an E, almost two octaves above the alto flute. The final phrase of Conversations with Silence is one of the most delicate in the composition. Every instrument plays pianissimo, and the highest note of the piece is left to hang until silence is heard. This silence is held as the final projection, a poem by Emily Dickinson, is displayed:  85  The words the happy say are Paltry melody but those the silent feel are beautiful – 56 The final silence is intended to allow the sounds, words, and images of the past 50 minutes to remain suspended in the room, bringing a sense of completion, and, at the same time, a feeling of continuation.  56  Dickinson, “The words the happy say” in R.W. Franklin, ed., The Poems of Emily Dickinson, 629.  86  Chapter 5 –Conclusion There would always have been that assertion—you cannot do this, you are incapable of doing that—to protest against, to overcome. Probably for a novelist this germ is no longer of much effect; for there have been women novelists of merit. But for painters it must still have some sting in it; and for musicians, I imagine, is even now active and poisonous in the extreme.57 -- Virginia Woolf I want to try and get across what I feel to be positive about the act of singling out women composers … I believe … that any art is much richer, much stronger if it is practiced by both sexes. If music has anything to offer the destructive, divided society of ours, won’t it need to spring from both men and women …?58 –Nicola Le Fanu  5.1 Aesthetic Statement In Conversations with Silence I have focused on specific aesthetic goals. Three years ago, when I began reading feminist musicological texts for the first time, I experienced a revelation. I felt that so many of their observations applied directly to my practice as a composer, and it was thrilling to feel like I was a part of this movement. While the general listening audience has a limited awareness of the theory behind feminist aesthetics, certain musical traits are noticeably dominant in Conversations with Silence: stillness, stasis, slowness, quietness, and spaciousness. I decided to challenge myself by writing a piece that explores these traits even further than I have in my previous compositions, and by more consciously using the concepts of sustained pleasure, restricted aesthetics, and forms that don’t develop along traditional patterns of tension and release. Music critics and theorists often undervalue these concepts and characteristics, yet at least some of them are present in all the music I find most beautiful. Added to the representational and theoretical nature of this piece and the musical program is a personal, emotional response to being a female composer and to imagining the struggles of female artists throughout history. It has always been important to me that my creative works are balanced between emotion and intellect. I write to explore ideas, to express my emotions, to challenge my craft, and to refine my definition of beauty. It is 57  Woolf, A Room of One’s Own, 70.  58  Nicola LeFanu “Master Musician: An Inpregnable Taboo?”, paper read to the Women in Music Conference, London, 6 February 1987, 2.  87  central to my work that I communicate and connect with my audience, so that each piece is part of a larger aesthetic conversation that carries on from piece to piece.  5.2 Innovation and Contribution A number of aspects of Conversations with Silence make it a significant contribution to the repertoire of contemporary music. By creating a dramatic musical composition that brings together the work of female composers, female writers, and feminist musicologists, I have not only built on the heritage given to me by the artists and theorists whose works precede mine, but have added a new voice to the academic feminist disciplines. While much of the work focuses on the historical absence of female composers, there is also a theme of celebration that runs through it. I celebrate women’s music by including quotations from three female composers; I celebrate women’s experiences through the songs sung by female characters, who are simultaneously victims and survivors; and I celebrate women’s writing by using the words of female writers as lyrics and for projection. Some of the broad feminist themes I have explored while writing Conversations with Silence are the role of gender in creativity and aesthetics; cultural notions of creativity and genius; the social context of music; the limitations of the musical canon and how the canon reflects the values we collectively place on art; the importance of recognizing a historical female lineage in the arts; and how the silence, absence, and insignificance of women creators and composers historically continues to affect contemporary composers and artists. These themes have not had broad attention among artists or theorists, and my hope is that Conversations with Silence will contribute towards increasing awareness and acceptance of women’s music and the concepts within feminist musicology.  5.3 Looking Back; Looking Forward This work also makes a significant contribution to my growth as a composer. The musical style and voice that runs throughout Conversations with Silence, although influenced by many sources, is ultimately mine. This composition extends and expands the musical language used in several of my recent works, notably: For Dreams of Things Which Cannot  88  Be, as she moves through shadows, and Neptune. But it is more than a continuation. It is a step forward in the evolution of my compositional style: this work caused me for the first time to take a step back and deeply analyse my process and aesthetic choices. Likewise, the analytical process involved in preparing this thesis document gave me new insight into my musical voice and challenged me to question many of my creative choices further than I had before. Conversations with Silence has also opened doors to a variety of future compositions. As my largest composition to date, it has enabled me to step over a longstanding barrier of 15 minutes. I look forward to creating other long-form works. Another first is creating a collage form. Although I had previously used the collage form in collaborative work, I had never engaged in this type of work in my individual projects. I hope to continue working in this way on new collage musical dramas that explore other topics of interest to me. Finally, the dramatic aspect of Conversations with Silence has been important for my growth as a composer, allowing me to learn about the relationship between music and theatre. I plan to continue writing interdisciplinary pieces, and I consider this piece an important step in building the skills required for longer and larger theatrical works.  89  Selected Bibliography and Works Cited Barkin, Elaine & Lydia Hamessley, eds. Audible Traces: gender, identity, and music. New Press: Como, Italy, 1999. Bowers, Jane & Tick, Judith, eds. Women Making Music: The Western Art Tradition, 1150-1950. Urbana and Chicago: University of Illinois Press, 1986. Brindle, Reginald Smith. Serial Composition. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1966. Burrell, Jocelyn. Word: On Being a [Woman] Writer. New York: The Feminist Press, 2004. Carr, Emily. Hundreds and Thousands: The Journals of Emily Carr. Vancouver: Douglas and McIntyre, 2007. Citron, Marcia J. Gender and the Musical Canon. Cambridge University Press: Cambridge, 1993. Cook, Susan C. & Judy S. Tsou, eds. Cecilia Reclaimed: Feminist Perspectives on Gender and Music. University of Illinois Press: Chicago, 1994. Cooper, Sarah. Girls! Girls! Girls!: Essays on Women in Music. London: Cassell, 1995. De Lauretis, Teresa. Alice Doesn’t. Bloomington: Indiana University Press, 1984. -----. Technologies of Gender: Essays on Theory, Film and Fiction. Bloomington: Indiana University Press, 1987. Dickinson, Emily. “The words the happy say” in R.W. Franklin, ed., The Poems of Emily Dickinson. Cambridge, Mass.: Belknap Press of Harvard University Press, 1998. Fuller, Sophie & Nicola Le Fanu, eds. Reclaiming the Muse. Chur, Switzerland: Harwood Academic Pubishers, 1994. Halstead, Jill. The Woman Composer: Creativity and the Gendered Politics of Musical Composition. Aldershot, UK: Ashgate, 1997. Irigaray, Luce. “Writing as a Woman,” in je, tu, nous: Toward a Culture of Difference, trans. by Alison Martin. New York: Routledge, 1993. Koskoff, Ellen. Women and Music in Cross-cultural Perspective. New York: Greenwood Press, 1987 Love, Nancy S. Musical Democracy. New York: State University of New York Press, 2006. Macarthur, Sally. Feminist Aesthetics in Music. Greenwood Press: London, 2002.  90  Macarthur, Sally & Cate Poynton, eds. Musics and Feminisms. Sydney: Australian Music Centre, 1999. McClary, Susan. Feminine Endings: Music, Gender, and Sexuality. Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press, 1991. Minh-ha, Trinh T. When the Moon Waxes Red: representation, gender and cultural politics. New York: Routledge, 1991. Neuls-Bates, Carol, ed. Women in Music: An Anthology of Source Readings from the Middle Ages to the Present. Revised ed. Boston: Northeastern University Press, 1996. Oliveros, Pauline. Deep Listening: A Composer’s Sound Practice. New York: iUniverse, 2005. Reich, Nancy B. Clara Schumann: The Artist and the Woman. 2nd ed. London: Cornell University Press, 2001. Ross, Alex. The Rest is Noise: Listening to the Twentieth Century. New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2007. Sadie, Julie Anne & Rhian Samuel, eds. The New Grove Dictionary of Women Composers. London: Macmillan, 1994. Salzman, Eric & Thomas Desi. The New Music Theatre: Seeing the Voice, Hearing the Body. New York: Oxford University Press, 2008. Solie, Ruth A., ed. Musicology and Difference: Gender and Sexuality in Music Scholarship. Berkeley, Los Angeles and London: University of California Press, 1993. Stoller, Debbie. Stich ‘n Bitch: The Knitter’s Handbook. New York: Workman Publishing, 2003. Woolf, Virginia. A Room of One’s Own. London: Penguin Books, 1928.  Articles Burkholder, J. Peter. "Collage." In Grove Music Online. Oxford Music Online, http://www.oxfordmusiconline.com/subscriber/article/grove/music/53083 (accessed July 28, 2009). Clark, Helen A. "The Nature of Music and its Relation to the Question of Women in Music." Music 7 (March 1895): 453-61. Einstein, Robert. "Yes, Virginia, There Are Women Composers in Early Music." Early Music America 3 (Spring 1997): 22-27.  91  Emmerson, Simon & Denis Smalley. "Electro-acoustic music." In Grove Music Online. Oxford Music Online, http://www.oxfordmusiconline.com/subscriber/article/grove/music/08695 (accessed July 28, 2009). Gates, Eugene. "The Female Voice: Sexual Aesthetics Revisited." Journal of Aesthetic Education 22 (1988): 59-68. Le Fanu, Nicola. “Master Musician: An Inpregnable Taboo?” Paper read to the Women in Music Conference. London, February 6, 1987. Nochlin, Linda. “Why No Great Women Artists?” In Women, Art, and Power: and other essays by Linda Nochlin. New York: Harper & Row, 1988. Platt, Peter. “Gender and Sexual Studies.” In Grove Music Online. Oxford Music Online, http://www.oxfordmusiconline.com/subscriber/article/grove/music/46710 (accessed October 10, 2008). Rieger, Eva. "'I Recycle Sounds': Do Women Compose Differently?" In Source Readings in Music History. eds. Oliver Strunk and Leo Treitler, 145-50. New York: Norton, 1998. Smith, Linda Catlin, “Composing Identity: What is a woman composer?” Paper presented at the University of Victoria. November 1, 1997. Youens, Susan. "Song cycle." In Grove Music Online. Oxford Music Online, http://www.oxfordmusiconline.com/subscriber/article/grove/music/26208 (accessed July 28, 2009).  92  Conversations with Silence By Jennifer Butler  Score in C Mezzo-Soprano Flute/Piccolo/Alto Flute Clarinet/Bass Clarinet Percussion Piano Cello Electroacoustics  93  Conversations with Silence This work is for mezzo-soprano and chamber ensemble consisting of flute/piccolo/alto flute, clarinet/bass clarinet, piano, cello, percussion (one player), and electroacoustics. Percussion instruments used are: vibraphone, marimba, glockenspiel, woodblock, large suspended cymbal, crotales, bass drum, and snare drum. A conductor is needed for coordinating the musical performance and for cueing the instruments, electroacoustics, and video projections.  Characters Conversations with Silence is in five Scenes. Each scene has a different central character, all performed by the same performer: Scene One – Eve Scene Two – a young mother Scene Three – Virignia Woolf, on the brink of her suicide Scene Four – an old woman Scene Five – a young lover  Sets and Costumes The sets should be minimal; costumes and simple props should be sufficient to create the setting for each Scene. I have left many of these directions purposefully ambiguous to allow the director and designers freedom in their realization of this work. Below I have included suggestions for each scene. Scene One – Outdoors on a sunny day. Eve meant to be a timeless character. The setting should not route her in a particular time. Set: greenery Props: an apple Costume: Simple, feminine, sexy Scene Two – In a nursery. The setting for this scene should reflect circa 1890s. Set: suspended window frame Set pieces: crib with baby, rocking chair Costume: dress that hints of an earlier era (1900s); youthful, colourful Scene Three – Beside a riverbank. Virginia Woolf committed suicide in 1941. Set: water images created with lights or projections Props: two heavy stones which can be held in each hand Costume: dark-coloured plain dress Scene Four – In a small room. Set: fireplace Set pieces: rocking chair, 30-40 ft. blood-red wool scarf still in process of being knit Costume: plain dress that reveals poverty and wear Scene Five – in a cozy room. The setting of this scene should be contemporary with the performance. Set: cushioned armchair or sofa Props: none Costume: return of Eve costume, perhaps with some alteration  94  In addition to the suggested set materials above, there should also be a simple writer’s work station (a desk and chair covered with manuscript paper, musical sketches, scores, writing paper, drawings, and various writing tools) permanently set up on some part of the stage.  Electroacoustics and Recordings There are four electroacoustic Interludes that divide the five scenes. Dearest also has an electroacoustic track that is heard through the movement. These five tracks are all prerecorded and can be performed from CD or digital files. There are also two vocal recordings used in Conversations with Silence. The first is heard in Breathe, and the second in Folding Outward. These tracks should be recorded by the mezzo-soprano in preparation for performance. Cues are marked in the score indicating the beginning of each track.  Projections A screen or blank wall is needed to receive projected digital images, but it is preferable to have at least two projection surfaces. My suggestion is that the texts included for projection throughout the piece be displayed on different areas of the stage, but should not interact directly with the performers (i.e. they should be projected above, below, or beside the central stage area).  Suggested Stage Setup The following diagram shows one possible stage setup. However, there are a wide variety of performance spaces available that would necessitate flexibility and creativity in arranging the performance space.  95  Table of Contents Scene One Part One: Eve (2 minutes) ....................................................................97 Mezzo-soprano Part Two: Drift 1 (2 minutes) ..............................................................98 Flute Piano Interlude One (2.5 minutes) ................................................................99 Electroacoustic Scene Two Part One: Breathe (3 minutes) ............................................................100 Flute Clarinet Percussion (Bass Drum, Sus. Cymbal, Vibe, Crotales) Piano Recorded Vocal Part Part Two: Lullaby (3 minutes) ...........................................................106 Mezzo-soprano Clarinet Cello Part Three: Fragment from Unravel (1 minute)..................................111 Piccolo Glockenspiel Piano Interlude Two (2.5 minutes)..............................................................113 Electroacoustic Scene Three Part One: Unravel (4 minutes) ...........................................................115 Flute/Piccolo Clarinet Percussion (Marimba, Bass Drum, Glockenspiel) Piano Cello Part Two: Dearest (5 minutes) ...........................................................138 Mezzo-soprano Alto Flute Bass Clarinet Percussion (Snare Drum, Sus. Cymbal, Vibraphone) Electroacoustics  96  Part Three: Breathe Reprise (2.5 minutes) ..........................................153 Mezzo-soprano Vibraphone Piano Interlude Three (2.5 minutes) ...........................................................157 Electroacoustic Scene Four Part One: Folding Inward (5 minutes)................................................159 Flute Clarinet Piano Cello Part Two: The Scarf (4 minutes).........................................................176 Mezzo-soprano Flute Clarinet Percussion (Woodblock, Marimba) Piano Part Three: Fragment from Unravel (1 minute)..................................197 Piccolo Glockenspiel Piano Interlude Four (3 minutes) ................................................................199 Mezzo-soprano Electroacoustic Scene Five Part One: Drift 2 (3 minutes) .............................................................201 Flute Piano Part Two: Lingering (2 minutes)........................................................202 Mezzo-soprano Part Three: Folding Outward (4 minutes)..........................................204 Alto flute Bass Clarinet Percussion (Bass Drum, Vibraphone, Crotales) Piano Cello Recorded Voice Song Lyrics ....................................................................................................215  97  Scene One Part one:  Outdoors on a sunny day. Eve enters holding an apple in her hand. She is feminine, sexy, and confident.  p  Slow and Sensual  4 & 4 E.  Mezzo-Soprano  & X  that  f X  F £ b Xj X  ¥  X  with  7  &  bX teeth  9  nXj b X  X  j X  that  X  fif  - ty  13  &  ¥  X  f bX  se - conds  I  16  & X stand  X  £  up  fif - ty  am  X still  E  a  ¥  X  bite  and  X  ting  juice  X  X  X  sweet  p U  X  X  sweep  and  shake  X  X  can  (breathy tone)  #X  X X  hoard - ing  bX X X  this ap - ple  98  slow gliss  ï X  in  £  X  my  j X  in  #E  me  P  ¥  P  a  X î E  X  F U E  earth  p  a - round  curl  X  for  X #X  a - live  live  p  X  nX  X -  X  rit. slow gliss  sum - mers  X X F  to  F poco accel X X X X  X  X  -  spur  11  & #X  X  Xj  wo - ody pulp  that  P a j X  X  X bX .  bX X X  it  (g)  P  F  ¥  bX  ci - der - ish  gnarled  (fast gliss with bite at end)  tongue  a  ¥  & X  in  £  X X X bX  scent  p X X E  sun  f X  X £ and  bX X bX X . ¥ X  X X  o  4  text by Dorothy Livesay  (breathy tone)  E  stand  bX hand  E  Part Two:  (Eve, remaining in character, slowly exits the stage during Drift 1.) Flute begins and piano enters approximately 15 seconds later. Parts should not try to synchronize; flute should finish last.  bw & nw  nEE  non vib.  Flute  #w w  &  bw nw  D  C  Eb  C vib.  bE nE  #E E  vib.  b b ww  bw nw  non vib.  Eb  C  Begin Interlude One  * vib. non  U bw nw  C  (Bars 28 - 31)  slowly, with expression  Piano  bX 44 bXX XX & X p  XX XX X X  XX X # X 4 ¥ a X D ?4 [  X XX X X X  XX X X XJ X X X  99  XX XX X X XJ X X  X b XX XX XX b XX X X X  E. #EEE ...  X bE . X X  U  X bX  ï ww w  U  X #X  Interlude One Interlude One begins during the final multiphonic at the end of Drift 1, as cued. Set and costume changes should take place during this interlude. The following text fragments and words are to be projected onto the stage. These fragments should appear in the order below, and be spaced through the interlude, changing approximately every 8-10 seconds. If two or more screens or projection areas are being used, then the text fragments may overlap in time, and be held onstage for a longer interval. However, the sequence should be maintained. Be Still Slowly Breathe day in day out my loneliness turn over that scent teeth and tongue in my hand sweep and shake me I am alive  100  (In a nursery. A shy, young mother enters the stage at the start of Breathe. She sits in the rocking chair beside the baby’s crib.) 30" (approx) Electronics  & X  fl.  Flute  Clarinet  &  F  #w ï  &  Piano  ï &  p  w  p  hold pedal throughout  w # w ? w p  X  fl.  F  ï  F  Bowed S. Cym.  Bass Drum Percussion  w  ord.  ord.  w ï  ï B.D.  p  w #ww F  101  #w  ï  1'00" (approx)  (recorded voice) Elec.  &  X  X  X  si - lent  breathe  Fl.  Cl.  X  X  #X  - ly  now  & & X # jX nX F  X  X  ï bX  crotale  (w)  Perc.  Pno.  & ?  &  Á bE g b EE g  X  f w #ww f  102  ï  1'30" (approx) Elec.  & fl.  Fl.  Cl.  bX  &  F  ord.  E  bX  bE ï  &  bX  X  Xj  X  fl.  ï  bX  P  nE  ï  E ï  ï  F  ord.  F  Bowed S. Cym.  w  B.D. Perc.  Pno.  ï  p  p  B.D.  & w # w ? w f  w #ww f  103  Á  P g b b EE g E g f  &  Elec.  &  X  be  Fl.  Cl.  X still  X  X #X  &  (X ) ï  & (E)  w ï  ï  vibe.  X  Pno.  &  & ?  p  X  wo  si - lent - ly  crotale Perc.  2'00" (approx)  XX  ï  X  #X Á  XX  f  XX  ï  with pedal  b X g n# EEE g P  g # EEE g ï  w #ww f  104  X  list - en  don't move  2'30" (approx)  Elec.  Fl.  Cl.  &  X  X  X  breath still  breathe  X  &  P  X  X  slow - ly  si  E  #X  X P  &  #X  X -  X  lent  -  #X  X  E  ï  ly  XX  -  slow  X  ly  E  X  ï  #X  X  Á XX  Á  B.D. Perc.  Pno.  Á  ï & w # ? ww f  105  3'00" (approx) Elec.  & fl.  Fl.  Cl.  &  &  ord.  X #X F X  F E  X  #X  slow - ly  X E # X # XX  Pno.  P  X  X  breathe  f  #E  f  -Xvibe. w bX b w  crotale  Bowed S. Cym. Perc.  X  &  #X p  ï  with pedal  & w # w ? w f  w #ww p  106  g # EEE g ï  Lullaby should begin before the final vibraphone notes have fully faded.  (The young mother sings to her child while sitting in a rocking chair.)  q = 80  Mezzo  Clarinet  Cello  3 & 4  ¥  3 &4  ¥  Vc.  34 ?  X  p  & X.  11 Mz.  Cl.  Vc.  &  X  now  X  X  X  X  to  X  X  X  bE  Xj X X a -bye  X  X X  X  X  X  D  Your  £  X  X  X  X.  X  X  X  j X X bX  cries  X.  X  X  X  X  j X  P F  £ X X X X X  X  X  Xj  X  E.  X  X  X  X  ¥  X  X  X  X  X X  by  the  X  X  P  breeze  ¥  X.  j X  ¥  p  ¥  X  But  bees  X X X X X 107  it's  D  D X  X  ba - by  X  cap - tured  have been  X  X D  D  D X  X  X.  X  D  E  bru - shes the grass and ti -ckles the  that  X  X  X  D  X  sleep  X  X  F  X.  X  D  X  E  X X  D  D  D  & ?  X  Xj X X  & ?  D  pizz.  time  Cl.  D  Hush  7 Mz.  D  p  D X  X  E  f  D X  ¥  ¥  16 Mz.  & E I  Cl.  Vc.  E  E.  X  will  stay  here  D  &  D  ?  X  ï  X  X  X  X  X  X  & bE .  Cl.  Vc.  Cl.  Vc.  & X.  Xj X X  &  D  ?  X  a bye  X  X  X  X  And  X  X  ba -  by  sing  to the  X  X  X  X  it's  X  X  X  X.  X  X  X  X  now to  X  X  X  X X X X X X  X  X  X  108  D  E  X  bE  X  hush  D a tempo  X  X  X  pizz.  X  X  p  X.  X  sleep  se  your  X  X  X. P  X  X  X  X  - crets have been  D j X  X  Xj X b X  D X  be  a tempo  molto rit.  X  X  D  D  Xj X X  time  X  gar - den  the  win - dow  D X  X  D X  X  D  X bX X bX  D X  to  molto rit.  E  X X X X X X  X  out  X X X X X X  X  D  ? X X X X X X  27 Mz.  X  D  &  X  Look  X  X  X  D  p  E  low  X  X  X  you  D  22 Mz.  with  D arco  E  X  P  X  X  X  X  P & X X X X X  32 Mz.  car - ried  Cl.  Vc.  Cl.  Vc.  & X  ¥ ¥  &  D  ?  X  X  X  Xj  F  X  p  ¥ ¥  X  & X  D  E  X  f  ro - cking  Cl.  &  Vc.  ?  in  my  D X  X  X  X  where they hide  X  X  in the  leaves  will  X  wood - en  D  stay  X  here  ï  X  X  P  bE .  with  you  Sit  X  X  X  X  X  X  D X  X  and  D  D  D  X X X X X X  X X X X X X  X X X X X X  109  X  D  E  chair  E  X  D arco  X X X X X  X  E  E.  X  D  X  X X X X  Xj  D  ¥ ¥  X  X  X  of the trees  X.  X  I  42 Mz.  tops  p E.  D  E  X  But  X  the  X  D  X.  X  36 Mz.  to  D X  X  X X  by the wind  & ?  E  F X X X  X  X X X X X X  X  p  E  X bX X  sing  to the  D X  X  X  X  X  X  47 Mz.  & bX  D  E  52 Mz.  Cl.  Vc.  &  X  Vc.  X  X  pizz.  X  P  X X. X p  your  j X X bX  dreams  have  D X  X  U X.  P  a -bye  ba  - by  X  X  X  X.  X  X  X  F X X X  sailed  up  X  X  D Xj  X  X X X.  X  X X  with the clouds  X  X  a cross the  D  &  X  j X  X.  X  sleep  & X  ?  X  F U E  fly  Cl.  X  X.  X  Xj X b X  it's  time  X  X  now to  D a tempo  molto rit.  56 Mz.  X  & ?  X  D  & ?  Xj X X  Hush  molto rit. Vc.  X.  X  cei - ling  Cl.  p  a tempo  molto rit.  to  X  Xj  X  X  X  X  p E.  X  P  E  X  X  X  where they'll  D X  X  X  the sky  D  X.  X  j X  X F  ¥  E  ¥  X  X  X p  ¥  X  sea  But  D X  X  X X X X X  110  D X  X  E f  D X  ¥  ¥  60 Mz.  & E I  Cl.  Vc.  will  & ¥  stay  X X X  X X X  arco  X  ï  & E -  pa  -  X  pered  Cl.  & E  Vc.  ? X X X X X X  & X  ba  Cl.  Vc.  X -  hush  X  X  X  X  X  X  X  X  XJ X X  X  X  X  X  X  X X X X X X  X  p  X  X.  a j X X X X  E.  X  X  hush  X  X  X  ï E. E.  111  X  X  X  me  X  - - side  X  sing  X X X X X X  a - bye  X  in  X  a JX X X X  E  And  Xj X b X  X  X  X  you  ¥  X  X X E  X.  X E & X ?  X  X  walls  X.  X  by  X  bE  X  69 Mz.  X  with  E  F  65 Mz.  X  X  E  X  here  X  D  ?  E  E.  X  ¥  X  X  X  X  these  X  X  X  j X X X a - bye  X  X  X  X  ¥  D  E. X  D  rit.  X  X  X  X X E  X  E  Á  X  Piccolo  4 &4 ¥  XJ X X X E. 3 a J a 4  Glockenspiel  4¥ &4  a XJ j X a X X 34  q = 80  Ó  Piano  44 XX X &  (The young mother leaves the stage.)  ï  X  ï  X  X  X  X  ï  Picc.  34 a XJ ¥ &  X X  Glsp.  34 a JX ¥ &  X X  5  Pno.  ï  4 ¥ 4  44 44  D  D  X.  a  b XJ X  w  ï  a b Xj JX a  bX X X X X X w X 4 b XX 4  X 3 E. 4  w  4 ¥ 4  X.  54 ¥  a  X X X a JX  34  54 ¥  a b Xj a j X X X ¥  34  b XJ  ï  E.  X X X X E. XX X X X X X 54 34  X X X X X w X X 34 44 &  112  D  9 Picc.  Glsp.  & &  ¥  X X X a J  ¥  a XJ X X  E.  ï  &  D  Picc.  44 ¥ &  Glsp.  44 ¥ &  Pno.  E.  bX X X X bX X  13  b XJ XJ X a a ï  3 4  2 a XJ X X 4  3 4  ï  Ó  Pno.  X X X 2 a J 4  54  a b Xj a j X Xj a 54  24 X  w  Ó #X X X X X X X 5w 44 b X 4 &  X  X  X  X  E.  D  34 E .  XX XXX E J J 44 a aa J ï  44 a JX XJ a a XJ X X D  D X  113  44  XXXXXXX  E  U D  c. 3"  U D  c. 3"  U D  c. 3"  Interlude Two Begin Interlude Two after the 3” pause at the end of Fragment from Unravel. Set and costume changes should take place during this interlude. The following text fragments and words are to be projected onto the stage. These fragments should appear in the order below, and be spaced through the interlude, changing approximately every 7-10 seconds. If two or more screens or projection areas are being used, then the text fragments may overlap in time, and be held onstage for a longer interval. However, the sequence should be maintained. Be Still Slowly Breathe I will stay here with you day in day out my loneliness turn over that scent inside these walls teeth and tongue in my hand and sing sweep and shake me I am alive  114  Text for projecting during Unravel Excerpts from Clara Schumann’s Diary are to be projected one at a time during Unravel, as cued. Each projected quotation should be held until the next begins. The final quotation should be held until the end of Unravel. Cue 1:  Cue 2:  Cue 3:  1839 I once thought that I possessed creative talent, but I have given up this idea; A woman must not desire to compose – not one has been able to do it, and why should I expect to? It would be arrogance, though indeed, my father led me into it in earlier days. 1846 There is nothing greater than the joy of composing something oneself, and then listening to it. There are some pretty passages in the trio, and I think it is fairly successful as far as form goes. … Of course, it is only a woman’s work, which is always lacking in force, and here and there in invention. 1847 I received the printed copies of my trio today; but I did not care for it particularly after Robert’s D minor, it sounded effeminate and sentimental.  115  q = 88  (Beside a riverbank. Virginia Woolf enters the stage and sits at the artist’s work station, writing.)  Flute/Picc  3 &4  ¥  D  D  4 4  D  D  3 4  D  Clarinet  3 &4  ¥  D  D  4 4  D  D  3 4  D  3 &4 Perc.  Marimba  34  XX E  p ¥  Xj X  X E  ¥ ¥  4  X X 4 E. ¥ ¥  p  q = 88  Piano  Cello  3 &4 3 ?4 3 ?4  44  Bass Drum (with yarn mallets)  Xj X  3  XX 4 E  X E.  ¥ D  ¥ D  44 X X  p  E E II I  E.E.  p  X X  E E E.E.  X X  44 E E 44 ww  116  XXX XXX  E E XX EE ..  XXX XXX  34  Xj X  ¥ ¥  34 a XX X XX X JX X P 34 X. jXX X.  X E 34 X E  XX  X  7 Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  &  4 4  D  4 4  ¥  ¥  a X X X X & XJ X X X j X X X X  ? XX..  Vc.  ?  XX  D  4  7  Pno.  D  X X 4 E.  &E  B.D.  D  EE  44  Xj X  ¥  X  D  3 4  D  X X X X X X 3 #X X X 4 p  3  X X 4 E  E. ¥  D  D  D  34  Xj X  ¥  ¥  44 a jXX X X XX XX X X  a XX X XX XX XX XX J X  34 a XX X XX XX J X  44 E E  E E  34 X. X.  44 XX  X X X X X X EE ..  XX  P  117  X X X X X X EE ..  X 34 X  j X X X X EE  X  11 Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  Pno.  44 X X E. ¥  ?  ¥  a XX # XX XX XX J #j X X X X  ? X.X.  Vc.  P  3 4  X.  XJ X X  P  B.D.  &  D  X #X X X  X X X X X X XX X X X #X X X X X X 4 #X X X X X X X X X X #X X X X X X 3 #X X X X X X X X X X X X 4 X X 4  & E  11  4 4  D  &  XJ X a  C flute  XX  EE  44  j X  ¥  X X E. ¥  D  34 XX # XX XX j X X X XX X P 34 ¥ ¥ D  44 a # jXX X XX EE X  a XX # XX XX XX XX XX XX 34 # XX XX XX J  44 E E  E E  44 # XX  X #X X X X X EE ..  XX  118  F  X #X X X X X # EE ..  34 X. X. X X 34 X X F  a XX J #j X X X X XX  15 Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  &  X X #X .  F #X X  X X  ¥  15  #X X X & X X X  ? X.X.  Vc.  4  X  ?  XX  XX  ¥  F  44  ¥  a XXj 44 # X XX EE X #j X X X X  44 E E  XX  44 # XX  X X  X X X  X #E  3 4  f  X X X X X 4 #X X X X X X  4  X #X  EE  X  X X X X X X X X X X X X XX X #X X X X X X X 3 X X 4  f  X #X X 4 #X X X X & X X XX X X 4 X X X X X  B.D.  Pno.  X J 4 X  j XX  X  ¥  f ¥  XX # X XX XX XX 34 XX X XX X X X X X X jX X X ¥  D  D  a XX # XX XX XX XX XX J X X X X X X  E E  XX  XX  119  ¥  X  f  ¥  ¥  a XX 34 X XX XX X J  ¥  X X X X X X # EE  34  XX  34 X . X. X E 34 X E  j X X X X  19 Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  B.D.  &  X XXX  a XJ E  &  f  & E Xj >  f  4 4 4 4  X XXE  X XXX XX  X X E.  44 XX E. F ¥ 44 Xj>  XXE  D  Pno.  Vc.  ?  XX EE  f  X E. 44 X E .  3 4  XXX XX  34 XX E  XX E.  19  XX aXXX X 4 a j & XJ X X X 4 X X f . j 4 ? XX. XX XX 4 EE  XX  3 4  X XXX  Xj>  D  34 Xj >  4 4 4 4  XXX X X X X  XXX X X X X  44 XX w f ¥ 44  3 4 3 4  E î  E  î  ¥  ¥  34 ¥ E î 34 D  D  X XX XX X  XX X X XX XX 34 EE ¥ a XX X XX XX XX XX 34 a XX X XX XX 44 a j X X JX JX  XXX XXX  E E  X X X 34 X . j X X 44 w XXX X. X X w  XX EE ..  120  E. 34 E .  w  44 w  î  34 E ¥ E E 34 E ¥ î  25  Piccolo  Adagio, molto expressivo  &  D  D  D  Cl.  &  D  D  D  Mar.  &  D  D  D  D  D  D  Fl.  B.D.  25  Pno.  Adagio, molto expressivo  & X. ï ? XX  Vc.  ?  Xj X X  X X X  D  X  X  X X #X  X bX X #X X  X X  D  121  X  U E.  X  U. E  X  ¥  ¥  ï D  ¥  ¥  X X  ï D  a tempo  ¥  D  X  fl.  a tempo  D  ¥  X #X  ï D  29 Picc.  Cl.  Mar.  &  X.  ord.  XJ X  a XJ E  &  & E  XXE  4 ¥ a XJ E 4  D  ï  . ? XX. EE  non vib.  ?  ï  j X X X X  ¥  j a Xj X XX a XX X. X. EE  a XJ X fl.  XXX ord.  D  34 XX E 34  D  44 a XjX XX a jXX XX  a XX XX a XX XX J J  j XX XX  44 E E  E E  ¥  E. 44 E .  a jX X XX  ¥  122  X 3 a J X X a XJ 4  a XJ X X X a XJ 34 X a XJ X X  X X E.  44  D  X Xj Xa a j # & X b XX  XXX  44 X X E.  XX E  29  Vc.  4E 4  (pitch bend)  ï  B.D.  Pno.  X a XJ X  (pitch bend)  XX EE  34  XX  D  a XX XJX a XX J  XX  34 X a jX X XX X  X (( X ))¥  E 34 E  a jX X  X (( X ))  ¥  34 Picc.  Cl.  Mar.  4 4  E  ¥  E  ¥ 44  4 4  & Á & Á &E Á  B.D.  ¥  44  D  34  Pno.  Vc.  D  3 4  U D  4 4  D  D  3 4  U D  D  D  34  D  34  Adagio, molto expressivo  D  D Adagio, molto espressivo  44 E jX b E XX bX X X X jX X Á P X #X X X X EE ¥ 44 X X X X X X # XX X X ? E &E  E E  ? Á  ¥  ¥ 44  U  34 E  U  34 E  D  U D  4 4  D  U D  U D  44  D  U D  U D  44  D  U D  ¥ 44  D  U D  ¥ 44  D  U D  rit.  D  D  123  E  34 ¥ ¥ # XX 44 E P  ¥ nXX  ï  E.E.  15  &  U ¥  . X ¥ X X¥ & ï  3 ¥ X. a JX 4 X. X X ¥ X. 4 4 P  . 34 ¥ a JX X ï  44 a XJ X. a XJ X.  34  34  44  40 a tempo, expressively  Picc.  Cl.  15  Glsp.  D  &  &  . XX X ¥ ¥ Glsp.  ï  D  B.D.  D  Vc.  34  D  X X X 3 X X & X bX X X X 4 bX X X X ï 34 D D ?  ?  D  D  34 ¥ X. a XJ 44 X. X X ¥ X. P  40 a tempo,expressively  Pno.  44  34  D  44  D  D  34 ¥ a XJ X. ï  34  D  44 a XJ X. a JX X. 44  44 X X X 34 #X X X X #X X X bX X X X P ï 44 34 D D  44  44  44  D  124  34  D  D  D  44 X X X X X X X X  D  D  3 a XJ ¥ X. &4 P  U 34 X ¥ ¥  3 &4  3 4  45  Picc.  Cl.  D  34 a XJ ¥ X. & P 15  Glsp.  34  B.D.  D  D  D  D  44 X X E.  Marimba  D  D  E B.D.  p  ¥ ¥  44  D  4 4  45  Pno.  Vc.  3 3 &4 XXXXX 4X ¥ ¥ bX u P 3 34 D D ?4 3 ?4  D  34  D  D  , #X , , X X XX X a # X X # X X X X X X X 44 X X X X X # X X X X X X X P £  34 UX ¥ ¥ ¥ ¥ & XX P  34  4 4  D  D ¥ ¥ X X P D  125  E E E.E.  P  X X  44 E. E. w 44 w  X X  ¥  D  D X X  Picc.  Cl.  fl.  Mar.  D  &  &  F  , X X , # X X X X XX X X X 3 XX #X X X #X X X X X 4 £ £  ,# X X X X  & E.  X X  ¥  B.D.  ? E.E.  Vc.  ?  XX  X X EE ..  Xj  ¥  3 4  D  &  34 E 34  D  50  Pno.  X J  X X. 3a J 4  50  X X  X #X X  , XX £  E.  34 E .  126  #X X X X  #X X X XX X X £  E  X X  F  ¥  ¥  D  34 E E  X  X X  ¥  D X X  E E E.E.  F  #X X  F  X X  X X X  53 fl. Picc.  Cl.  &  4 4  X # X fl. X  X  X X  X  X Xfl. X X  X X  , #X X , XX # X X X , XX X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X #X X X X X #X X X X 4 #X X X X X X X X 4 & £ £ £  F  Mar.  & E ¥  B.D.  X 4 E.  ¥  44  53  Pno.  ? EE  Vc.  ?  E.E.  X X  ¥  #X X  E.  D  44 E . E.  f  127  #X f  E. E. XX  #X X  # XE  X  D  ¥  D #X X  44 # ww  Xj X  ¥  D  4 4  D  &  4  Xj X  X  # XX  X £  X  56  Picc.  Cl.  3 &4  &  X  X  X  X  X X , X #X X X X 3 #X X X X 4  B.D.  34 56  34 & X  X  X f £  ¥  #X  X  XX  3 ? 4 EE X 34 E ?  #X  X  X  X  # XX  ¥  #X  X  X X  Xfl.  ¥  #X X  X  X  XjX  X  X  X X X #X X X #X X X X X XX £  £  f  34 & X  Vc.  X  fl.  f  Mar.  Pno.  X  X  #X  X £  X X  E E  XE  X  128  X £  #X  XjX  X  X  fl.  XX  E  ¥  X  X X # X nX X X #X X X [ £ X E X E  X X  X  X , #X X X X X XX X £  ¥  XE  X  #X X  X  X £  #X  XjX  X  ¥ #X X XX X X  X X  59  Picc.  Cl.  Mar.  4 &4 4 &4  X  X X  #X  Xfl.  44  ¥  44 & X Pno.  4 . ? 4 EE. E 44 E . ?  X  # X nX [  X  Xfl.  X  3 4  î  E.  E  #X X , X X X X #X X X X X X X X 3 X X X X X X 4 £ £ £ X  59  #X  X,  44 & E.  B.D.  Vc.  X  #X X  £ X  X  ¥  E  ¥  î  XjX X  #X X  î  D  X  î  X  X  # X nX [  34 E.  34 £ X  ¥  E  D  D  34 X E.  E  X X  34 E . E.  E E  ¥  X X  34 X  E  ¥  XX  î  129  X  EE..  ¥  62 Fl.  Adagio, molto expressivo  D  &  Cl.  &  Mar.  &  B.D.  Vc.  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  Adagio, molto expressivo  . ? EE .  ?  D  D  £  [ XXX X X #X X & X X #X X X X ï [ 62  Pno.  D  C flute  D  X E X E E. E.  U  a tempo  p  D  D  44 X X E. ï 44 D  XX E a J  ¥  ï U E XX EE E ï D  130  X 4 a # X X X X @ a X X XJ a 4 P  EE..  ï  X X  D  XX E. 44 a J  a tempo  E E  D  4 a XJ E . 4  a XJ E  XX  44 E. E. 44 ww  b XX  67 Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  ¥  &  XX XX X X X # X # X XJ a a ¥ XK @ a 34  34 X X E  & E.  67  a b XJX &  E.  E. ? E.  Vc.  ?  bX X  X E a J  X E a J  XXX XXX a #X a @  XX  E  E  p  D  34 EE  EE EE..  131  X X  D  X E a Xj  E a j XX XX  E. 34 E.  X X  #X X X XJ a a  D  E 34 a XX bj b XX  nE . E.  XX  34  D  B.D.  Pno.  3 a XJ E 4  X E. a J  XX  EE EE ..  XX  71 Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  &  a  b XJ E  XX  XX XXX X X XJ # X 4 a @ a 4a ¥ K@ a  44 X X E.  &E  44  D  B.D.  71  Pno.  Vc.  ?  EE ..  X bX  X X X 3 a # X X X a a @ XK X X J a @ X X X 4 ï  34  D  44 EE ..  X E a J  34 X X E  44 a b XX E. J  a Xj E & X  ? EE  X E 3a J 4  4 a XJ E. 4  X X  D  w  34 EE E.  44 w  34 E.  132  X X  D  34 a XX E J X nX  E  a XJX E XX  EE EE..  XX  X E. 4a J &4  X E. J a  75  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  X E 3 a J 4  4 & 4 E. 44  X X  34 X X E  E.  D  4 a j E. & 4 XX 4 E. ? 4 E. w  4w ?4  X #X  E. E.  XX  D  w w  34 EE E.  34 E . Á  133  Á  Á  XK X. Xa @ X  ¥  Á  D E  34 a XXJ E  a j E. # XX  @  X #X  XX E  34  D  75  Vc.  Á  X X X X 4 X # X ¥ a X X @ X X # X ¥ X X X X X . 3 @ X # XX XJ a ¥ 4 &4  B.D.  Pno.  X E a J  XX  EE E.E.  ¥ ¥  79 Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  Adagio, molto expressivo  D  U D  D  3 4  D  D  4 4  &  D  4 4  D  U D  &  D  44  D  U D  D  4 4  D  U D  &  B.D.  79 Adagio, molto expressivo  X X X X 4 X X Xj 4 & Pno.  Vc.  E  p  X bX X bX X X bX X X X 4E E 4 ?  ?  D  44  E  U E  F  f  U D  D  134  D  D  3 4  D  D  D  34  D  D  D  34  D  D  a tempo  34  D  D  34  D  D  D  b XE X X U D  D  D  a tempo  bE ¥ b XX 34 E F  XX X EE X  XX # XX  85  Picc.  4 &4  D  3 4  Cl.  4 &4  D  3 4  Glsp.  4 &4  B.D.  44  D  34  D  34  85  Pno.  Vc.  4 &4  D  44 ?  D  4EE ..  ?4  34 34 XX X 3 b EE #X 4  rit  D  D  4 4  U D  D  D  4 4  U D  D  44  U D  D  44  U D  D D  D  D  D rit  D XX X EE X  135  U D  44  U D  44 U  XX w XX 44 w  ï  X X X X J a J a ï  Piccolo  ¥  D Glsp. 15  &  ¥  a XJ jX a X X ï D  a tempo, expressively  Ó X X X XX X X X X  ï  with pedal  D  D  90  Picc.  3 &4  Cl.  3 &4  E.  4¥ 4  D  4 4  Glsp.  3 &4  B.D.  34 &  15  Vc.  b XJ X  w  a ï  X w 3 a JX ¥ X 4 4 4 ï  D  3 4  4 4  D  D  44 ¥ X. a b X JX a J  D  34 a XJ ¥ X X 44  D  D  44  D  34  D  Ó 34 E. &  D  D  D  D  4 4  X X XX X X X w 3 4  bX X X 44 b XX X X X X w  90  Pno.  X.  (Virginia stands and slowly walks to centre stage, holding two heavy stones in her hands.)  4  4  3 ?4  D  44  D  D  34  D  44  D  3 ?4  D  44  D  D  3 4  D  4 4  D  136  Picc.  Cl.  3 4  5 &4  3 4  D  D  D  2 4  34  D  ¥ a XJ X X  D  24 a XJ X X  34  D  D  D  24  D  5 a aXXX¥ & 4 ¥ b XJ j 15  Glsp.  B.D.  5  & 4 95  Pno.  Vc.  XXX 2aJ 4 ï  X X X E. J ¥ a ï  bX XXX 5 ¥ a J a XJ &4 ï 95  D  E.  X X X X XX X X X X X E. 5 3  &4  Ó b X X E. X X bX X  4  24 X X  D  D X  54 ?  D  34  D  D  D  24  D  5 ?4  D  34  D  D  D  24  D  137  X  100  Picc.  3 &4  Cl.  3 &4  E.  bX X X w 4 ¥ a JaJ 5 4 4 ï D  4 4  Glsp.  3 &4  B.D,  3 &4  15  Pno.  Vc.  34 ? 3 ?4  U D  D  44 ¥ a b X a X X a 54 J JJ  D  44 a JX JX a a XJ X X  U D  D  4 4  D  4 4  U D  Ó  D  5 4  #X X X 4 b X X X X X 54 w 4 D  44  D  44  D  54  D  54  138  X 4 4 D  44  D  44  D  D XXXXXXX  3" pause  U D  4 D 4  34 E . & 100  XX XXX E J 4 a JaaJ 4 ï  D  D  5 4  X  E  U D  D  U D  D  U D  3" pause  e = 76  Mezzo  6 &8  D  D  dear - est  ,  Alto Flute  Bass Clarinet  Percussion  Piano  P Xj X  Xj X  dear - est  F  X b X . X Xj X I  shan't re -cov -er  , , , 68 & X b X X X X X XX X b X X X X X X X X X b X X X X X X X X b X X X X X X X X X ï , X X X X X X X X bX X , X X X X X X bX X X X X X X X X , XX X X X X X X b X X X X b X 6 ?8 ï 68  D  D  D  D  68 &  D  D  D  D  6 & 8 bX X X X X X bX X X X ï XXXX XXXX 68 bXXXX .... J ? sempre ï  bX X bX X X X X X X X X X X X X bX X X X bX X bX X X X X X X XXXX bXXXX XXXX .... J  bXXXX ... .  XXXX XXXX J  XXXX XXXX J  XXXX ....  with pedal  Electroacoustics  68  whispered voices begin  water sounds begin, and continue throughout the piece  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  (notes on timing for electroacoustics are approximate)  139  p  5  Mz.  8 &8 X X X this  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  Perc.  Elec.  time  a 6 X X Xj ¥ 8 j  dear - est  8 & 8 X nX X X E  a X bX  this time  ¥ 68 X bX X X X X X X X ï  X X X X X. I  feel cer -tain  X bX X X X X  p , XX X X X X XX X X X X X X X X b X X X X b X X 8 ¥ 68 ?8 p ï 88 S.aCym.JX X P  ,  F . X X X X X X X. I am go ing mad  X X X bX X XX X X  a gain  ,  X X X XXX X P bX X , X XXX XX P  68  D  D  D  D  68  D  D  D  8 & 8 bX X X bE p 88 bEEEE .... ?  ¥ 68  88 & 5  Pno.  P  88  E  b X X X X X X b X X X X b X X b X X X X X X X X b X Xb X ï P . XXXX XXXX XXXX bXXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX bXXXX ¥ 68 bXXXX ... J J J J ï  XXX XX p XXXX ....  whispered voices continue intermittently  68 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  140  p  9  Mz.  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  8 &8 X ¥ D 8 & 8 E. . 88 E ?  p p  88 S.E.Cym Perc.  88 &  P  9  Pno.  Elec.  P  68 Xj X ¥  Xj X  b Xj X  dear - est  P  F  dear - est  I can't  68 X X XX XXX X X X ï  X X. X b X X X ,  I  shan't  re - co - ver  XXX XX X X  p  X X X  this time  X X XX XX  p  ¥  X #X X X X X X X X #X , X X X X X X X X X 68 p ï  ¥  68  D  D  D  68  D  D  D  D  8 & 8 E.  ¥  88 EEEE .... ?  ¥  68 #X X X X X X X X X X ï XXX XXX 68 #XXXX .... XJ X ï  X X #X X X X X X X XXX ... X.  XXX #XXX XJ X  X  p  #XXX .... X  P  ,  XXX  #X X ,XX X X X X  X X #X X X X X X XXX X  XXX X  XXX X  88 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 68 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  141  13 Mz.  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  p  & Xj  a a ¥.  X.  &  ,  ï  JX a a  S. Cym  P  D  X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X bX X X X X X X X X ï X X X X X X X X , X bX X X X X X X X X X bX X , X X X X X X  E.  Perc.  D ,  & E. ?  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  13  & E. Pno.  Elec.  EEE ... ? E.  X X X X X X X X X X X X bX X X X X X X X bX X bX ï  D  D  XX XX  D  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  142  17  Mz.  p  F  & Xj X  Xj X  dear - est  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  I  feel  p  F  Xj X  b Xj X  dear - est  I  feel  nX  the  X X b Xj X voic - es this time  ï  8 8 nX  this  ,  ,  &  D  D  D  D  D  D  88 E. P  88  8 & X X X X X X b X X X X b X X b X X X X X X X X b X X b X X X X X X 8 E. p P ï  ? # XXX.X .. ï  jX X XXX XXX  X. # XXX ..  j XXXX XXXX  j XXXX # XXXX  X. XXX ..  88 EE. # EE ..  ¥ ¥ ¥  S. Cym  17  Elec.  time  8 & X bX X X X X X X X bX X X X X X X X X X X X X X bX X X 8 X bX X E p ï P X b X X X X X X X X b X , X X X X X X X X X X X X X b X X ,X X 8 E. 8 ? p ï P  Perc.  Pno.  a X X Xj ¥  D ¥ ¥  88 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  143  P  21  Mz.  6 &8 X X X X  I feel cer -tain  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  a  F  f  go ing mad  a -gain  F . X X X. X X X b X  6 & 8 X X X X X X X X X X XXX ï 68 X X X X X X X X X X X X X ? ï  ,  Snare Drum (with snares)  Perc.  68 jX X . p  68 &  XX X .  X.  D  a -gain  p XJ @ X X X  a  a -gain  p  . a . bX X X X ¥ shan't  re -cov er  ,  X X X X X X X X XX XX XXX X X X XXX ï P X X X , X X XX X X X X XX X XXX , X X X XX X P  ï  XJ XX X X  j XX.  D  XX X .  JX jX X  D  XJ XX X X  D  21  Pno.  6 & 8 X X X X X X X X X X X X XX X X XX X X X X X X X X X X X X X ï P ï  6 XX ? 8 b XX ï  Elec.  68  j XXX XXX ... X X.  j XXX b XXX X X  XXX X  j XX XX  EEE ... E.  a b XXX X  X X X X XX X XXX ... X.  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  144  P  25 Mz.  & X X.  I can't  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  X X X  ?  D  D  ev - en write  & X X XX X  a  P p rit. F X # X . X X X. X X X. X X X # X wat -er  D  XXX  XX , X X P XX  C Flute  a # X XX X  E.  E.  XX X.  E. P  X a  Perc.  D  &  S. Cym  F  D  ¥.  Vibe. with bow  ¥.  a  X p  25  Pno.  & X X XX  ?¥  X X X X X E. P  . j b XXXX XXXX ...  EEE ... E.  X XX  X.  XX. X # XX  P j X X.  fill me  ¥.  . b EEEE ...  X.  wat -er take  X.  rit.  D  D  D  D  a D  E.  flood me  X P  rit.  ¥.  a D  X  p  rit.  D  P  (hold pedal to fermata)  Elec.  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  145  U a a Xj  30 Mz.  &X X X me  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  X X X  & ?  UX J a a ï  U D  D  a tempo  D  P  D  Xj  dear  X  - est  Xj X  your  life  ,  ¥.  Alto Flute  ,  X bX X X X bX X X X X X X X X bX X X X X X X X ï X bX X X X X X X X bX X , X X X X X X X X bX X , X X X X X X  ï  S.D.  j XX.  ï U XJ XJ a a  XX X .  X.  XJ XX X X  j XX.  XX X.  with mallet  Perc.  &¥ 30  & Pno.  ?  ï  U D  U D  a tempo  bX X X X X X bX X X X bX X bX X X X X X X X X X X X X bX X X X ï  D  D  XX .. b XX .. ï  j XX XX XX XX  whispered voices increase in density at the beginning of each new verse  Elec.  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  146  34 Mz.  & X  your  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  F  b X . X Xj X life  with -out me  F  P p Xj a b Xj Xj a a  Xj b X  me  your  ,  life  j XX  XJ XX X X  j XX.  ,  XX X .  X.  X  your good - ness  & bX X X X X X X X X bX X X X X X X X bX X X X X P p bj X , , bX X X X X X X X X X bX X X X X X X X bX X X X X X ? p P XJ  X  X  P  XJ  a  X  j  j  P  Xj X  ,  I can't  j X X X X bX X X X X X X X X X X j X  j X X X X X b X X ,X X X X X X  XX X  X  j XX .  XX X .  Perc.  &  D  D  D  D  34  Pno.  Elec.  & bX X bX X P j XX XX ? XX b XX  X X X X X X bX X bX X X X X X X X X X X X bX X X X bX X bX X X X X X X p j XX XX XX XX  XX .. b XX ..  EE .. EE..  j XX XX XX XX  XX .. XX..  j XX XX XXb XX  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  147  ï  p  38 Mz.  I  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  Xj X  & Xj X  can't  go  ¥.  bX .  P  ¥.  on  b Xj  Xj X  from  me  your  F X  ¥  life  Xj  your  ,  ,  & X b X X X X X X X XjX b X X X X XjX X X X X b X X X X nX Xj X X X X X X X X X X X ï X b X X X X X X j X X b X X X jX X X X X , X X X b X X X X X , X X Xj X X X X Xj X X X X X X X ? ï XJ  j XX  XJ XX X X  Perc.  &  D  X.  JX a a  S. Cym.  P  D  X.  S.D.  ï  XJ  XX X  X  j XX.  XX X.  D  D  38  Pno.  Elec.  & X b X X b X X X X X X b X X X X X X b X X X X b X X b X X nX X X X nX X ï j X X XX ? X X b XX  XX .. XX..  EE .. b EE ..  ¥.  X. # XXX .. ï  j XXXX  XXX XXX XX X # XXX  XXX.X ..  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  148  42 Mz.  &  X.  life  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  P X X XJ a a with -out  ,  bX X X X X X X bX ev - ery thing  me  j X  F  j X  I  am has  gone  X  bj X  & XX X X XXX X X X X X X XXX P F , , X X X X X X X jX X X X bXj nX X X X X X jX X X E. ? f P XJ XjX  Perc.  &  XJ XX X X  XjX .  D  X XX .  E. F  a ¥. D  a #X  C Flute  # X X XX X XX X  .  E.  S. Cym  D  D  D  p  X ¥  ¥.  ¥  X  Vibe. with bow  a  P  42  Pno.  & XXX P  ?# EEE.E ..  Elec.  X X X X XX X X X X. # b XXX ..  X X X X X X X E. f X XXX  j XXXX EEE.E .. F  E.  . # b EEEE ..  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  149  46 Mz.  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  & &  F X #X X X X X wat - er  fill me  F  ¥.  46  &  wat - er take  me  X.  f  rit.  Elec.  U a a X X X Xj  X  Vibe. with bow  X X X UXJ a a p  a  D  D  X  rit.  ¥.  D  a  p  ¥  D  EEEE ...  XJ XJ a a  with mallet  D  U EEEE ...  ¥.  Alto Flute  j  X b X X X # XX ï X bX X X X X X X X  ï  S.D.  j XX.  ï  ï U D  rit.  a tempo  me  U D  Pno.  ? EEEE ...  P  D  D  &  X.  D  ?  Perc.  flood  XK X  X.  rit. f X X X X X #X  XX X .  D  a tempo  bX X X X X X bX X X X ï  D  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  150  50 Mz.  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  D  &  a X bX  dear - est  & X X X X jX X X X X ?  P Xj X  can't  ,  j  XJ XX X X  -  -  X bX X X X X X X X X bX  , b X X X# jX X X X X XjX nX X b X X Xj X X X X X.  con  X. b X X a X  j XX.  ,  cen trate  Xj Xj a Xj X  can't  bj X  go  a  on  j  ,  j  Xb X X X X X X X X X b X X X X X X X , X X b X X X b jX X X X X X X X b X X X X X XjX X Xj X  XX X .  JX  j XX  XJ XXX X  j XX.  XX X .  Perc.  &  D  D  D  D  50  Pno.  & bX X bX X X X X X X X X X X X X bX X X X bX X  ?  Elec.  D  Xj XXX b XXXX  b EEEE...  bX X X X X X X X bX X bX X X X X X XXX.X..  XXXX  b Xj XXX XXX.X..  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  151  54 Mz.  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  &  a  F  b X . nX X . b X X  mad  a -gain  a -gain  Xj  p  a a  Xj X  ¥.  a -gain  F  a  . bX X X  feel cer tain  ev ery  ,  a  X X . b Xj ,  thing  Xj  has  & X X X XjX X X X X b X X b Xj X X X X X XjX X b X X X jX X X X jX X b X XjX b X X jX X X XjX X X X X P F , , b X b X X X X X X X jXX X b,jX b X X X X X jX X X Xb jX b X X j, X X X jX X X b X X jX X jX X X X X bX X b X XjX X ? P F X.  XJ XX X X  j X X.  XXX.  JX jX X  XJ XX X  X  j XX .  XX  X.  Perc.  &  D  D  D  D  54  Pno.  & bX X X X X X bX X X X bX X bX X X X X X X X bX X bX X X X P  ?j XXXX b XXXX  XXXX  j XXXX  XXX.X..  j XXXX b XXXX  XXXX ...  a  X X bX X X X X X bX X X X F j  .. .  move clusters steadily lower until very bottom of the piano is used  Elec.  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  152  58 Mz.  f  (Virginia exits the stage. while singing)  & bX .  X  gone  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  a  D  wat - er  D  &  D  D  a # X XX X  C Flute  ? E. P  E.  E.  E.  E.  X  F  Perc.  D  &  D  Pno.  ?  Elec.  P  X  ¥.  a  F  X.  F  f  wat -er take  flood me  X.  X.  U X.  me  UX .  XX X P  D  D  U D  D  D  U D  ¥.  D  ...  fill me  X.  ¥.  Vibe. with bow  E. . ..  XX. X # XX  a  58  & bE . P  P rit. F X #X X X X X X X X X X #X X X X  a D  X  ¥.  with mallet  a D  ï  X  ¥  P rit.  XJ UX .  ï U D  U D  ...  (hold pedal to end)  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  153  U  Breath Reprise should begin immediately after Dearest.  20" Mezzo  (off stage)  &  X  X  X  si - lent - ly  breathe  Vibe.  X  &  X  hold pedal throughout  ,  E P  & Piano  X X  w # w ? w f  ,  E #E  X w #ww f  hold pedal down throughout  40" Mz.  &  X  #X  now  Vibe.  still  X  X #X  si - lent - ly  w # w ? w f  X  X  #X X  list - en  don't move  X  & &  Pno.  be  X  X p  E #E w #ww f 154  X P  #X  X  #X  ,  Mz.  1'00  4 &4  X  X  X  breathe slow - ly  breathe still  Vibe.  X X #X  X  si - lent - ly  slow  X - ly  X  4 &4  -  X XX X bX X  4 &4 Pno.  #X X  X bX  F  44 #www ? f  X  # X- X- , #X X  XX  f  bX #X X X bX  ï  w #ww î  XnX # X  1'20 Mz.  &  #X  with  Vibe.  &  X  X  si - lent  X  X  breath  be  ?  #X  #X  slow - ly  still  X  X  & Pno.  X  w #ww P  155  E #E P  X  ,  1'40 Mz.  &  X  #X  -  slow  Vibe.  &  Mz.  &  Vibe.  &  breathe  ,  X #X p  w #ww P  X  still  XX  breathe  XX  X X  X X ï  ,  2'00  #X slow  breathe  p  w # w ? w P  X  X  b EE  X X & #X Pno.  ly  X  X  -  -  X  X  ly  si  X -  -  X  lent  -  -  #X  X  ly  slow  X -  ly  X  & Pno.  ?  156  2'20 Mz.  &  X  si  Vibe.  Pno.  w # w ? w p  -  -  -  #X -  lent  -  -  #X  ly  breath  X  & &  X  Xj  bX  X X  ï  X  X #X  X  X  bX  nX  bj X  X  bX  XX  X  bj X  ,  X  2'40 Mz.  &  X  si  Vibe.  #X -  lent  -  X  X  ly  be  & &  j X  Pno.  w #ww ï  ?  157  P  #X  X  ï  X  X  X  #X  Interlude Three Interlude three begins immediately after the final notes of Breathe Reprise. Set and costume changes should take place during this interlude. The following text fragments and words are to be projected onto the stage. These fragments should appear in the order below, and be spaced through the interlude, changing approximately every 5-7 seconds. If two or more screens or projection areas are being used, then the text fragments may overlap in time, and be held onstage for a longer interval. However, the sequence should be maintained. Be Still Slowly Breathe I will stay here with you day in day out my loneliness I shan’t recover Everything has gone turn over that scent inside these walls teeth and tongue in my hand and sing This time sweep and shake me I am alive I can’t even write It’s time now  158  Text for projecting during Folding Inward The following segments should be projected at the cues indicated in the score. (From Corona Schroter – announcement of the 1786 collection in Carl Friedrich Cramer’s Magazin der Musik.) Cue 1:  I have had to overcome much hesitation before I seriously made the decision to publish a collection of short poems that I have provided with melodies.  Cue 2: A certain feeling towards propriety and morality is stamped upon our sex, which does not allow us to appear alone in public, and without an escort: Cue 3:  Thus, how can I otherwise present this, my musical work to the public, than with timidity?  Cue 4: Fade text  159  (In a small room. An old woman enters, and sits in the rocking chair, knitting an extraordinarily long red wool scarf, which spills on the floor around her.)  q = 76  Flute  44 &  D  Clarinet  4 &4  D  Piano  4 &4  D  44 ?  # XXEE  X  ï  ¥  #E .  X  D  a  ï  £  ¥ a X  D # XXEE  aj #X E  X  # XjE .  E.  ï  ¥  D ¥  #X X . #X E  ¥  E.  X #X E  ¥  D  X  X #E  ï  D  D  D  with pedal throughout, let ring through rests  Cello  44 ?  D  D  X E. a J  ï  160  #E .  ¥  D  D  D  ¥  ¥ #X p  D D  E p D  Xo Eo J ¥ a & p  wo  & X . # X X X. XX  X #X E .  E D ï  D  D  D  D  D  D  #X>XJXX XX a  7  Fl.  Cl.  7  ï  &  D  ?  D  D  D  D  D  D  Pno.  Vc.  Eo  ?  D  D  f  #E F  161  £  X XX XX #X P  ¥¥  X #X E .  £  X XX X # X X #X P f  >X EE X aJ f  X #E . P  D  12 Fl.  Cl.  & X XXE  &  p  D  D  Ó w  ?  D  Vc.  ? E  24  ï  Pno.  D  X#X X p  E.  24 24  D  12  &  ¥  E.  ¥  D  44  D  44 D  X  ¥  44 D  D  D £  £  X XX X X X X X . X E #X #X X P f P p XX #X X a. K f  E #E  XXX XXX  f  p  24  D  #E 44 E P  D  D  24  D  44  D  D  162  17 Fl.  Cl.  D  &  X ¥ D  & w 17  &  X X  D  ¥ D  D  D  Pno.  ?  Vc.  ?  D  D  ¥  D  D  #X X F # EE  P  D  D  24  D  44  D  D  D  24  D  44 D  £ ¥ ¥ #j X F  D  24 D  44  D  24 EE  44  D  X X XX X  £ P  ¥ D  XX XX XX  163  D  XX # EE .. p  £ 24 ¥ 44 # XX EE XX a #X X X p F ï  23 Fl.  Cl.  &  D  ¥  D  & w  Xo  wo  p  Xo  ï  XE  XX  a b Xj E  XX p  f E.  w  wo  ï  ¥  D  f  23  &  D  D  D  ? D  Vc.  ? D  ¥  ¥  X  X P  ¥  #XX XX XX .. XX X X # ¥ ¥ X X  # X X X # X XE X aJ p  F  D  D  f  E. ï  164  ¥ a  D  Pno.  ¥  P  D  p  Ó bX X X X  £ f #XJX XX £  P D  ¥ ¥  28 Fl.  Cl.  w  X ¥ D  & w  X ¥ D  &  28  & Pno.  Ó bE E ï  ?  Vc.  #X  D  ? X X XX p  a j #X X X X X ï  D  X  E.  ï  D ¥  X f  # XX XX  ¥  165  D E E #E E  ï  £  ¥ D  D  D  D  ¥  D  X #E .  D  D  D  £ X  * Projection Cue 1  D E E  D  X p  # XXXX  D  D  X p  33 Fl.  Cl.  &  &  w  X  X X Xb X X X w XX XX  £ f  F  a b XJ E .  D  E p E  w  F  a  XXX  £ f  X. X  . bX X X X E  £  î  D  D  D  D  D  #XJX XX a ¥ ¥ P  D  D  p  33  & Pno.  D  D  #XX XX X # ¥ ¥ D X ? D f  Vc.  ?  D  D  ¥ E  P  166  X  #E  X.  JX w  F  f  38 Fl.  Cl.  &  X Xo Xo  E  Xo  p ï D  &  ¥ D  D  D  D  D  E p  D  D  D  D  D  D  Pno.  ?  Vc.  ?  X X£  X X. ï  # XJ w  X  a  ¥ D  D  D  X X #X X a J  #XXJ XX D P D  167  ï  D  38  &  XX w  XXE  D  D  p  D  D  X X. X X #X . X ï  D  D  D  44 Fl.  Cl.  & X ¥D  &  D  * Projection CueX2 X X X b X E. X bX X X XX ¥  D  F  ¥ bX  D  F  £ f  P  p  E.  w  ¥ #w  ¥  F  ¥ w  p  ¥  F  #E . p E. p  44  & Pno.  Vc.  D  D  #XX XX XX X # ¥ #E E ? D X F P  ?  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  ¥  X X X XE #X X X #X E F f  X ¥ D X  D  D  ¥ #X X X #X E  X ¥ D  168  f  F  w  X  50 Fl.  Cl.  &  &  w  Xo Xo a J ï  Xo  Eo Xo wo  Xo  ¥ D  D  ¥ D  ¥ a #j X E p  XX ¥ D  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  X  Á  X¥ D  X. # X E X w Á  50  Pno.  Vc.  X E. a #j & X E. ï  ?  D  ?  D  D  X p D  # XXXX  ¥  X  169  ¥ D  D  ¥ a b XXJ f  D  D  ¥  X  f  56 Fl.  Cl.  &  X . XJ X X X X E X  f D  & 56  X & X¥ D Pno.  D  ?  Vc.  ?  w  bX £ P  X  X X  E.  ¥  D  D  D  E.  ¥  D  D  D  î D  a j X X î  XÓ X J ¥ D D a bXXXJ XXX £ î D  E  D  XJ a ¥  D  170  D # XXXX  X P  D  D  Ó #E E E  E  p  ï  £  D  D  D ¥ X f  D  D ¥  #X  f  62  Fl.  Cl.  X XX a JX X & î a b & JX X E î 62  Pno.  a bXXXEEE ... & J î  ?X  Vc.  ?  E  X  XJ a¥  X  ï w  XXX  ¥ D  X bX  E.  * Projection Cue 3  ¥ D  D  £  a JX X X X . b X X #X p  X ¥ D  ¥ D D  D  a bj XX XX ¥ p  D D  ¥  D  ¥  171  X p  X  #X  w  ï  ¥  D £  X #X bX  X X XX  D  bX X X X ï ¥ D D  w  ï  67 Fl.  Cl.  D  &  &  E.  24 D 44  D  ¥ 24 D 44  D  D  D  ¥  a b XJ X  E  E.  E.  P  p  ¥  D  X bX X E . ¥ D bX p  ¥ a b JX  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  F  P  67  &  D  24 D 44  ?  D  24 D 44 EEE F  Pno.  Vc.  ?  E.  D  # XJ E 2 4 a ¥ 4 D 4 ¥ F  EE E  a  # JX E .  172  w  E.  EE E  D  P ¥ ¥  #E . p  74 Fl.  Cl.  D  &  &  w  D  X bX X F  bX £  Xo Eo . aJ  wo  Xo  X X bX E  w  X ¥ D  p  XX  p  ï  ¥ D  D  ¥ a b JX  D  P  74  &  D  D  D  D  D  ?  D  D  D  D  D  Pno.  Vc.  ?  X  ¥ D  D  D  173  D  D  D EE  D  P  ¥  #E .  P  80 Fl.  Cl.  D  &  &  * Projection Cue 4  D  w  X bX X X  D  £ XX F  X  E.  D  ¥  ï  a  non vib.  # Xj X P  X #X E .  D  D  D  D  80  &  D  D  D  ?  D  D  D  Pno.  Vc.  ?  E.  ¥  D  D  174  EE E  P X #X E .  P  D  D  non vib.  w p  85 Fl.  Cl.  & X ¥ D  &  D  D  D  D  bX . X X X p  X X E  ¥  ¥  non vib.  #E . p  w p  85  &  D  ?  D  Pno.  Vc.  ?  X  ¥  #EE  p  D  D  D  D  D  D  D  175  D EE E  D  p  ord.  X  p  #X  X  X X  X  89 Fl.  Cl.  & w  & w  X  ï  X  ï  ¥ a  # Xj X ï  ¥ D  w  D  X  ¥ D  ¥ a  # Xj w Á  D  3" pause  ¥  E.  89  &  D  D  ?  D  D  Pno.  Vc.  ?  X  X X  #X . X ï  X  ¥  E  non vib.  Á  D Xj # w  ï w  176  X  D  D  D  D  ¥ D  D  3" pause  The Scarf should begin after a 5" pause following Folding Inward.  q = 72  Mezzo  #4 & 4  (The old woman continues to knit, sitting in the rocking chair.)  D  D  D X X. X X X X  Flute  #4 & 4  D  D  Clarinet  #4 & 4  D  D  D  Marimba  #4 & 4  D  XX XXX J a ¥  D  Woodblock  Piano  ¥  ¥  ï  ï  44 X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X XX XX X XXX X X X X X X XXX XX XX X # 4 XX XXX XX X XXX X X X X X 4 X X X & ï #4 ? 4  D  D  D XX  pizz.  Cello  X  #4 ? 4  D  a  D  177  ï  X XX X E  XJ a  ¥  4 Mz.  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  #  D  & D  &  D  X XX XX. X  # XX XXXX E X ï  #  D  E  X J a ¥  XJ a ¥  ¥  XXX  ¥  ¥  D  XX X X X X X X X X X X XX X XX X X XXX # XXXXXX XXX XX X X X X X X XX & 4  ?  #  D  D  wool  X J a D D  X X XX X  D  D  XX X X E a XX  ?  #  D  X X X X *X X X X X X X X X X  D pizz.  Vc.  X  red  D  D XX  X X. X X X X X  X X E  XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  W.B.  Pno.  X  Thick  #  &  D  P  178  XJ a ¥  D  ¥  a  XXXXXXX  8 Mz.  #  & X.  twists  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  # XXX  #  & ¥  X E  X  X J a  X  XE  ¥  & D  X  X X X X X X X  scratch ing pul ling  need les  D  ¥  XJ  XE XXX  a  X  X XX X  ¥  X X X  click ing  X XX X E  D  X J a ¥  D  p  X X XX  marking time  X J a  ¥  ¥  a XX  X  X X XX  ?  X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX X X X XXXX 8  & ?  Vc.  in -dex fin -ger  a round my  #  W.B.  Pno.  X X X X X X X  F X  ?  X X # XXX #  #  X  XXXX  X  X XX X  XX X X X X XX X X XXX X X X XX X X X X X X X X  D  D  D  a  X X X X X XJ a ¥  pizz.  179  D  D  11 Mz.  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  & E  &  &  p  X X nX  knit knit purl  &  X X X  P  knit purl  D  X #XX XX  ¥  ¥  XXXXXXXXD 11  Vc.  #  # ? D  W.B.  Pno.  #  X #XX XX  # ? D # ? D  X X X  knit purl  X X  purl  X X P X p  D  X X X X X X X X  X X X X X p  w  w D  a JX F  arco.  XX XX XX  X X X  X X X  EE  XX  F  EE  XX XX p  EE ..  X X X X X p  180  X X P  D  XX XX XX XX  X  knit knit purl  D  XX XX XX P ¥ XX  ¥  p  F nE  XX  XX X  X  F  P & X X nX X X X 14  Mz.  #  knit purl  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  #  ï X  ¥  purl  turn  w D  #  & X XX X X X #X ? X  ?  EE  #X X X  o  ¥  & X X X X X X X X X X X X X p # ? w  X  D  #  14  Vc.  nE  D  W.B.  Pno.  knit purl  F  E D  XX XX XX F XX  EE..  X X X  X X X  -  X X E ver  XXXXX XXD  D  ¥  D  181  X XXX  D  D  p  D  D  ¥  X X X  ¥  D  D  EE ..  X  D  @ ï  XXX  ï  D  &  XXXXX XXX XXXXXXXX  ï  X X X X X XK @ a @ X X X  ï  D  D  XXX  18 Mz.  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  &  &  #  D  D  #  X  ¥  ¥  D  #  D  #¥ &  X  @ X  @  XXXX  ï  XXX XX XX  X X X.  X  X  ¥  D  a D  D  D  X X X XJ a D X  ¥  XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XX XX X X X X XXX XX #K a XX XXXX @ X Xk@ a & @ @ 18  ?  Vc.  X X X X X X X  Ev - ery stitch i - den - ti - cal  W.B.  Pno.  P  #  # ? D  D  pizz.  a  X X X XJ a X X X XJ a @ X  D XX ï  X X.  XXX ¥  182  D  D  D  pizz.  @  XXXXXX  21 Mz.  #  & X  row  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  F  X X E  af - ter row  XX # XX & @  &  a  #  #  & D  Xj X  day  in  p  X X X  day  D  ¥  @  D  XX a XXXXX  ¥  X X X X X J a ¥ @X X  XXX XXXXX  wash -  D D  D  XX X # XX J a XX X X a XXXa ¥ @ @ X & @ 21  ?  Vc.  bending scrub bing  X  D  X X X XJ a  X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X XXXX X X X X X X X X X X X X XXXXX X X X XX X XXXXX  W.B.  Pno.  X  out  D  F X X X X X X X  ?  @  XXX  X  X  @¥  X  #  D  D  D  X J # a ¥  D  D  D  183  X X X Xj a  f & X X X X X 24  Mz.  #  - ing  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  #  tuck -ing  X X my whole  D  X X X  bo - dy  &  #  -  X X  -  D  X  X  ¥  ches  a @ XK  ?  #  D  D  ¥  D  ¥  D  ?  X XX X XK X X a a X @X @ @ @X ¥  D  D pizz.  ?  #  D  @  XX  XX XX  184  X X X  X XX XXX X ¥  XXXXXXXXXXXXX X X X XXXXXXXX X X XX X X XX XXXX ¥ X X # X X a XJ X X ¥ @ & @  p  knit knit purl  D  D  24  Vc.  a  p  X X X # X X XX XX X & @  W.B.  Pno.  P  D  ¥  D  X X P X p  D  XX XX XX P ¥ XX  ¥  a JX F  arco.  P & X X X 27  Mz.  #  F X X X  knit purl  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  #  #  & X X X X X X X X # ? w  X X X  purl  knit knit purl  & XX XX XX  ?  E E  #X X X  XX XX XX F XX X X X  X X X  F  knit purl  D  X X X X X p  X X P  w  #  #X ? X  knit purl  D  X X X X X X X X w  D 27  Vc.  E  D  W.B.  Pno.  knit purl  P X X X  p  D  D  XX XX XX p XX  EE  EE..  X X X X X  X p  185  XX XX XX  XX XX XX F XX  X X X  X X X  X X  X  F  EE  30 Mz.  #  & E  ï  ¥  X  purl  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  #  # ? w  Vc.  D  #  # E. ? E.  ¥  D  ¥  D  X X X p  ¥  D  D  D  XX a. K ï  XXXXX  D  D  &  X.  X  ¥  D D  ¥  @  XX  XX  ï  ¥  XXXXX XXXXXXXXXXX X XXXXXXXX XXXXX XX  D  & E. E.  ?  - - ver  ï E  D  #  X  ¥  & X X X X X p  X X X  X #X E D  #  30  o  D  W.B.  Pno.  turn  X  ï  X X X XX X X K X X K X X X XK a a . @a @ X @ X X X a @  ï  D  186  D  D  D  pizz.  D  XK X . X  a @ ï  34  Mz.  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  #  & D  ¥  #  X X X X.  a  &  #  X X  X X X X X X  eight een months and  X  XXX # X K a @ D & @  D  X  X  X X  X X.  D  X X  I have come to you  @ XX X XXX @  D  D  twen ty days  X X X X X  F  X X X X X.  XJ a  XJ a ¥  ¥  D XXX X X @X X  D  XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX X X X X X X X X XXX X XXXX X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X 34  #  & @ ?  Vc.  For  & ¥  W.B.  Pno.  P a j X  ?  XX  a  #  #X  ¥  XX X X  X Xk@ a  X  X  X X X XJ a @  X @ ¥  @  XX  X X @X X a  @¥  D  D  D  D  D  D  187  37 Mz.  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  P  #  X X X X  & E  &  &  &  #  #  ¥  -  ¥  X  ning  D  @  #a XJ a ¥ X X & ?  #  j X a ¥  D  XXXXX X #a X pizz.  ?  @  @ D  ¥  D  188  X X X  knit knit  @ XXXXXa  ?  XXX  ¥  XX  Xj X a  @ D  D  ¥  ¥  D  XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XX XXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX¥ XXX  P  purl  D  D  D  37  Vc.  -  XXXXX  X X X X X X X XJ a D @  D  #  W.B.  Pno.  my lone - li - ness each eve  in  D  X X X  p  XX  @¥  D  X X P X p  XX XX XX P XX ¥  ¥  arco.  a XJ F  # & X X X 40  Mz.  knit purl  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  #  #  & X X X X X X X X # ? w  40  Vc.  knit purl  & XX XX XX  ?  X X X  knit knit purl  EE  #X X X  XX XX XX p XX  X X X X X p  ¥  X  purl  turn  D  w  XX XX XX F XX X X X  ï  ¥  X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X p P  D  EE ..  knitpurl  p E  D  D  EE  X X X  knit purl  D  X X X X X p  P  X X X  w  #  #X ? X  purl  D  W.B.  Pno.  X X X  F E  w D  X  XX XX XX XX  EE  X X X X  F  189  D  XX XX XX F XX  EE..  X X X  X X X  ¥  EE ..  ¥ X X X p  # & X X X X E 44  Mz.  o  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  &  #  #  # ? E  44  Pno.  & ?  Vc.  - - ver  ?  # #  #  ¥  D  D  D  D  XX K a. ï  D  XXX XX  D  D D  W.B.  X  D D  D  ï  X.  ¥  a  ¥  D D  D  &  X  D  ¥  a X  XX  ï  X XX X. X  D  ¥  D  XXX XXXXXXXXXXXXX XX XXXXXXX XXXXX XX XXXXXXXXXXXX XXXX  ï  X X X @¥  ï  X XX XX J K a. @ @ a a X @ XK X X a D  D  D  X . a @K X X ï  D  190  @  XX  a  XX X X D  X  ¥  D  @¥  48 Mz.  #  P  & X X X XXX In  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  of the  fi  #X  @  X X E -  -  re place  XXXXXX  X XX a X X @  & D  &  X  D  #  X  XXXX  a D  @D  I ad mire  ¥  D  D  -  -  @  ry  X X XK  D  X XX X X a @K X X a  D  eve  f X X  ¥  D  XXXXXXXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXXX XXXX XXXX XXXX XXXXXXXXXXXX 48  & ?  Vc.  dim glow  #  W.B.  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Xj X X X X X X X X  But you  #  W.B.  Pno.  ¥  a  f  P  X # K @a ¥ ?  a  X  X XJ  XX a @X X J a  193  a  X  X XJ a X X X XJ a @  57 Mz.  #  ¥  & E  mine  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  &  X  purl  X X  knit purl  D  #a  X XX X a  #X a & K@ ¥  D  & ?  ?  #a #  #  X  ¥  D  X XJ a D D  D  X X  knit  X purl  F E  ?  X X  knit knit  D  X X X X X X X X P  X X X X X X X p  w p  w D  XX XX  P  purl  D  XXXXXXXXD 57  Vc.  X  X X  knit knit  #  W.B.  Pno.  P  D  XX XX XX  XX XX  XX F ww  a XJ X X X F  X X  X  XX P XX  XX  EE  194  EE  XX XX p  X X X X X p  60  Mz.  #  X X X  & X purl  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  knit purl  #  purl  turn  & X X X X X X X X P  X X X X X X X p  # ? w  w  & XX  ?  #  X  EE  X X X X  F  XX XX  X X  XX F ww X  D  D  D  XX XK X a. @ Á  D  XXX XXX a  D  - - ver  D  D  EE ..  X X X  E  D  D  XX XX XX  #E ? E  o  E  D #  X X X X X  D  #  60  Vc.  knit purl  ï X  ¥  E  D  W.B.  Pno.  X X  ï X  D X X p  195  X  ¥  D  Á  D  &  XXX X XX XXXXXXXXX X  Á  XX  X XK X a. @  X @¥  Á  D  D  64 Mz.  Fl.  Cl.  Mar.  &  &  &  #  D  #  ¥  D  #  D  #  & ¥  a X  XXX  Á  D  a ¥  XX # a a X J KX a @ XX & @ 64  ?  Vc.  @¥  D  D X XX a X @ @  D X  XXX K a X @ D  XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX  W.B.  Pno.  a  ¥  D  X XX XX  D  #  # ? D  @  XX  X X X K a @a ¥  X  X  X @¥  XX a X J a  D  D  D  X XXX a @K X Á  D  D  196  67 rit. poco a poco (q = 72)  Mz.  &  #  D  #  D  Fl.  &  Cl.  # XX XXX a D & @ Á  Mar.  #  & D  XX  @ Á  XX  D  a @ XK X  X  Á  Á  rit. poco a poco (q = 72)  # XX & @ @¥ Á 67  ?  Vc.  ¥  D  D  X X K @a ¥  D  D  a ¥  D  D  D  D  D  a X X X.  X XX a ¥  2" pause  D  X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X XXX X X X X X X X X X XX XXXX XXXXXXX X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X XX X X  W.B.  Pno.  D  (q = 60)  ?  #  #  X  a @ XK X a  XX  a X X a . KX X X X @@ @ a XXXX a a X XX X a  D  D  a XX  Á  X XX  (q = 60)  D  D  D  D  @D  D  D  197  2" pause  q = 80  Piccolo  4 &4 ¥  Glockenspiel  4¥ &4 Ó  Piano  XJ X X X E. 3 a J a 4  (Old woman exits the stage)  44 XX X &  ï  a XJ j X a X X 34 X  ï  X  X  X  X  ï  Picc.  34 a XJ ¥ &  X X  Glsp.  34 a JX ¥ &  X X  5  Pno.  ï  4 ¥ 4  44 44  D  D  X.  a  b XJ X  w  ï  a b Xj JX a  bX X X X X X w X 4 b XX 4  X 3 E. 4  w  4 ¥ 4  X.  54 ¥  a  X X X a JX  34  54 ¥  a b Xj a j X X X ¥  34  b XJ  ï  E.  X X X X E. XX X X X X X 54 34  X X X X X w X X 34 44 &  198  D  9 Picc.  Glsp.  & &  ¥  X X X a J  ¥  a XJ X X  E.  ï  &  D  Picc.  44 ¥ &  Glsp.  44 ¥ &  Pno.  E.  bX X X X bX X  13  b XJ XJ X a a ï  3 4  2 a XJ X X 4  3 4  ï  Ó  Pno.  X X X 2 a J 4  54  a b Xj a j X Xj a 54  24 X  w  Ó #X X X X X X X 5w 44 b X 4 &  X  X  X  X  E.  D  34 E .  XX XXX E J J 44 a aa J ï  44 a JX XJ a a XJ X X D  D X  199  44  XXXXXXX  E  U D  c. 3"  U D  c. 3"  U D  c. 3"  Begin Interlude Two after the 3” pause at the end of the Fragment from Unravel. Set and costume changes should take place during this interlude.  (Mezzo-soprano enters one minute after the electroacoustic track begins. She walks over to the writer's work station and performs the following text over top of the electroacoustic track. The text should be spoken and sung, as indicated) Mezzo-Soprano (spoken): Yes, I am a woman.  How does it influence the work in its making?  Does it influence it more or less than the fact that I grew up in New York?  More or less than the fact that I grew up listening to the music of Debussy and Ravel, more or less than the fact that I love the paintings of Rothko, Frankenthaler and Morandi, more or less than the fact that I spent much of my teen-age and early adulthood reading the work of Colette and Virginia Woolf? And this is just a tiny fraction of the list of facts that are me.  I’m in rebellion against labels and want to keep as many doors open as possible at the same time.   & X  Don't  & #X  com  & X  X  fence  me  # X>  - po  bX  she  &  bX  X  is  the  X bX E  own  -  light  #X  U D  E in  A  X X  ser  is  X  # X>  #X  a  X  X  -  dan  -  #X  #E  cing  dog  E  moon  X X X  the ea - gle  X  X  which must  200  wo  X - - man  X  X  bX  X  but  one  which  shines  X bX bX  soar  X E  X X with her  & X X X I  nei ther  X X X  want en trance  & X X X X I  want to change  XX X X  in to  X X X X  the club  nor  X X the  do  I  want  X X X #X  club  I  want  to  see  X X X X X  to  X  those  form  a new club  bX X ap - ples  & X X X X X X bE rol -ling all  o - ver the floor  (spoken) Yes, I am a woman.  How does it influence the work in its making?  I’m in rebellion against labels and want to keep as many doors open as possible at the same time.  Don’t fence me in.  201  (A young woman enters at the beginning of Drift 2. She is confident and poised. She sits writing at the artist’s station throughout Drift 2.) Flute begins and piano enters approximately 30 seconds later. Parts should not try to synchronize; flute should finish last.  Flute  &  #w w  44 ww & Eb  b b ww  C  Eb  bw w  D  &  non vib.  non vib.  Eb  w w  #E E  vib.  b b ww  ww  w w  D  Eb  w w  w w  U D  c. 5"  ü  #### # 6X X X X X X X X X X X X XXXXXX X & # 8 X X slowly, with expression  Piano  bw w  C  Eb  w w  non vib.  UX X X X X X  Fanny Mendelssohn Hensel  UX #### # 6X X X X X X X X X XX X X X X XX X X X X XX ? X XX X & X X & # 8 X X  202  Mezzo  ï & X X with  & bX  your  X  ï & X X X  -  p & X X  ï  lin  bX  X X  X  in - ti - mate - ly  on  lin - ger  -  ing  on  my  ï X X X  with your hands  # X # X nX X X X a - wa ken me  ï  Á nX on  my skin  X  X X  my  203  skin  a - gain  p  P X X X X  I feel your hands  bX  X  X  lin - ger - ing  P nX X X X  with your hands  in - ti - mate ly  ï  X bX X  my skin  X X X  Á  on  p  in - ti - mate ly  so  Á  X X X  X  X  X  X  X  X X X X bX  a - wa ken me a - gain  ger - ing  X  bX  Á X #X X X X #X  a - wa ken me  you a wa ken me  X  p  your hands  your scent lin ger - ing  you  so  nX X  a - wa ken me  X # X # X nX # X  & X X X bX X so  Á  p X # X # X nX X  -  you  X X X bX X  your hands  Á & bX  hands  ing  with your hands  &  X #X #X X X  X  X  lin - ger  &  (The young woman begins to sing Lingering from the station, and gradually moves to centre stage)  p  X X  skin  your scent  X # X # Xn X X  you a - wa ken me  p nX X  your hands  P X X X X I  feel your hands  (Young woman returns to the workstation and continues to write)  Texts during Folding Outward Approximately 30 seconds into Folding Outward, as cued in the score, the following recorded text, from Emily Carr’s Hundreds and Thousands, is played: Cue 1: Look at the earth crowded with growth, new and old bursting from their strong roots hidden in the silent, live ground, each seed according to its own kind ... each one knowing what to do, each one demanding its own rights on the earth ... So, artist, you too from the deeps of your soul ... let your roots creep forth, gaining strength. Near the end of Folding Outward, as indicated in the score at Cue 2, the following poem by Emily Dickinson is projected onto the stage. Cue 2: The words the happy say Are Paltry melody But those the silent feel Are beautiful  204  q = 50  Alto Flute  44 &  Bass Clarinet  44 ?  D  4 &4 Percussion  D  D  44 w ï  £ ¥ ¥ X X # X 34 E X P p  D #w  X XJ a  ï ¥ X p  D  Piano  Cello  44 ?  a # Xj X .  XE .  P  D  w  ï  D  P #EE .. ¥ w X XJ a D  205  XX ¥ £ F  44 D  34 ¥ ¥ 44 D # XX ï with pedal) 34 (Vibe. always 44 D D  D D.  D  D  Vibe., yarn mallets  D  X ¥ D  44 D . & p . 44 ¥ #EE . ? w  D  Crotale, with bow  Bass Drum (with yarn mallets)  q = 50  34  XJ a 44  #X E a XJ 34 X . p  34  34  ï  44 a # XX XX XX J  D  F 44 #www  D  44 ¥ # EE .. F  #E £  6  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  & ¥  ?  X. p  XX X # X E . P  #w  JX a ¥ D  Crotale, with bow  a & P  D  6  Vc.  . & D p #EE .. ? ¥ w X a¥ D ? XJ  ¥ D  D  D  D  Vibe. with mallets  # XX  D  Pno.  D  P # JX X  Perc.  * Cue 1 (for recording) ¥ D  a #j X X.  XE . ï  D  F ¥ w  #EE ..  D  D  206  ¥  D  £ ï  34 E . 34  E.  34 ¥ X ¥ p  Crotale, with bow  # XXXXXX F  D  a b XXJ  D.  ¥ E £ ï bE  D  D  34  D  E. XX X X XX .. b XX b X 34 £ ï 3 D D 4  D  3 4  D  11 A. Fl.  B. Cl.  D  &  D  ?  D  &  #X  X X X  P D  D  & Pno.  Vc.  D  p  w # w ? w  ?  X.  p  XX X X  D  P #XX XX XX  # EE ..  P  XJ a ¥ p  #X E . X 44 F  X X 44 X F  Vibe.  Perc.  11  44 a JX E . F  D  a  44  X J a ¥  ¥  # XjX XX f D  E  44 a #nXX XX X X J f F . 4 ¥ #EE . 4 w 44 XXJ a ¥ ï  207  D  p  X  D  D  D  ¥  D w  B.D.  ï D.  ï ¥ w  a # Xj #EE ..  D  15 A. Fl.  B. Cl.  D  &  ?  D  #w  XJ a¥  p  Crotale, with bow  ¥ X  & D  a . XK X Á  Vibe.  # XX ï  Perc.  XE .  15  Pno.  & X. Á ?  Vc.  ?  w  p  D D.  D  ï #EE .. ¥ w  X  34 a XJ p  a JX  X.  #X E .  Á  XJ a ¥ D  D D  D  D  208  34 # X X E p  D  D D  X ¥ D  £  E  34 34 E . ï 34 ¥ p 3 # EE .. 4E .  #E  XJ a ¥ ¥  F  X Ja  F  ¥ ¥  D  D E. #X X aJ  3 #X X X X 4 p  ¥ # XX F£ #ww  XX  XJ a ¥ ¥ F  20 A. Fl.  B. Cl.  &  # X 4 X E. a #j X X X. X 4  D  P  ?  D  &  # >JX X >X X XX ¥ £ f Vibe.  Perc.  D  # >X E a # XX & £ f #ww ? 20  Pno.  Vc.  ?  D  X XJ a D ï  F  . XE X #w # X X X K 44 J a ¥ a. p P ï Xa XJ ¥  D 44 D  D  44  # XX ï  D  D  44 D .  D  . 4 ¥ #EE . 4 w  D  44  # a JX  ï  XJ a¥ D ¥ D D XE.  D  D  209  X.  w  ï  D  D w  B.D.  ï D. p  ¥ w  a #j X #EE ..  XJ a ¥ ¥ a XJ p  25 A. Fl.  B. Cl.  &  ?  D  34  D  44 D  ¥  D  34 a # X j X f  X . 4 #X X4  JX a D p  ¥  & D Perc.  Crotale, with bow  X  p  X XE .  25  Pno.  & X. ï  Vc.  ?  X  X  D  44  D  34  D  44  D  34 D  ?  34  X #X X £ F  f 34 # #EEEE ... .  44 D . P  D  34 XJ a ¥  4 ¥ 4 w ¥  210  44  a Xj X  D  XX  £F  p  X  D Vibe.  # XX p  a JX p  #EE ..  XX  X. D  D  ¥  D D  #X E  # X .. X  f #XX XX XX  P  ¥ #X  # >X  29  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  34 X &  3 &4 34 29  3 &4 Pno.  Vc.  X  3 ?4 3 X ?4  44  D  D  D.  D  44  D  D  D.  D  44  D  44  ï  3 ?4  Perc.  XJ a ¥  #X X XX  E  ï  sub.  D  XJ a ¥  D  # XX p  D  44 D .  a #j X X.  ï . 4 ¥ #EE . 4 w 44  Vibe.  ¥  211  X X bX p a X bX £p  D  D D  #X E .  Á  D  ¥  £  w  B.D.  ï XX  D  D  p  ¥ w  #EE ..  X X. X J #X X #X E a P  F  a b XX £ P  XJ a  X. X 34 X & bX X 33  A. Fl.  P  B. Cl.  X. X 34 X X X ? P 3 &4  Perc.  3 &4 Pno.  Vc.  34 ?  3 ?4  ¥  XJ a ¥  ¥  ï  ï  X  X XJ a ¥ D  D  ¥  F E. #EE ..  #X  F  E  44  XJ a ¥  D  44  E a JX  > a b XXJ XX  XX a 44 J  D  D  44  D  ¥  ï  Vibe.  D  D  34 E . 33  XJ a ¥  F  ¥  D  D  XXE  XJ a ¥  £  p  212  ¥  X X p  f  44  a # XXJ XX  44  a # XJ E f  f 44 # #wwww  D  D  #X X a J p  X #X p  37 A. Fl.  B. Cl.  D  &  ?  E.  D  D X #X  w  XJ a ¥ ï  D  D  D  D #w  ï  X  Crotale, with bow  D  &  # XX p  Perc.  D 37  & Pno.  Vc.  X Ja  ¥ ¥ a JX  ï #EE .. ? ¥ w  ?  E.  ¥ D  D  Vibe.  D  #X E . X. D  XX  w  D  F w # #www  D  XJ a # X E X ï £ F  213  D w  B.D.  ï D.  ï #EE .. ¥ w XJ a ¥ D  f  ¥  D  X ¥ D # X. a XJ  XE.  D  w  ï  p  42  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  #X X X X & ¥ F XJ a ¥ ?  D  E  Cue 2 (for projection)  D  34  X a JX  34 E  p  D  D  &  *  F  Crotale, with bow  X  Pno.  & D F ? ¥ w  Vc.  P  #EE ..  JX a ¥ ?  D  X  D  D  34  D  D  D  3 4  D  D  3 4  D  X E. p  p  E.  34  p  D a #j X X  X  D  Perc.  42  D  34  ¥  D  D  D  214  Vibe.  X X E p  p ¥ #EE  E.  D  A. Fl.  B. Cl.  46  44 ¥ #E . & p  a j X ¥ D  44 # w ? p  XJ a¥ D  4 &4 Perc.  D  44 B.D. w ï  Pno.  Vc.  4 ?4  #w  ï  D  U D  ¥ X D p  X Ja D  D  U D  Crotale, with bow  X E aJ  4 . &4 D ï . 4 ¥ #EE . ?4 w  XJ a ¥ D  D  w ï  D  46  D  U D  (fade to black)  D  ¥  D.  p w # #www  #w ï  215  w  w Uw  X w aJ ï  D  U D  XJ a ¥ D  U D  Song Lyrics Eve  (This song uses an excerpt of text from the poem “Eve” by Dorothy Livesay.) O That scent gnarled ciderish With sun in it That woody pulp For teeth and tongue To bite and curl around That spurting juice Earth sweet! In fifty seconds, fifty-summers sweep And shake me – I am alive! Can stand Up still Hoarding this apple In my hand.  Breathe (Text by Jennifer Butler) Breathe Silently now Be still silently Don’t move Listen Breathe still Breathe slowly Silently slowly Slowly breathe  216  Lullaby (Text by Jennifer Butler) Hush a bye baby It’s time now to sleep Your cries have been Captured by the breeze That brushes the grass And tickles the bees But I will stay here with you Look out the to the garden below And sing to the window Hush a bye baby It’s time now to sleep Your secrets have been Carried by the wind To the tops of the trees Where they hide in the leaves But I will stay here with you Sit rocking in my wooden chair And sing to the ceiling Hush a bye baby It’s time now to sleep Your dreams have sailed Up to the sky Where they’ll fly with the clouds Across the sea But I will stay here with you Inside these papered walls And sing Hush a bye baby Hush a bye me  217  Dearest (Text arrangement by Jennifer Butler, from the letter Virginia Woolf left to her husband before her suicide.) Dearest, dearest I shan’t recover this time Dearest This time I feel certain I am going mad again Dearest I can’t Dearest I shan’t Recover this time Dearest I feel Dearest I feel The voices This time, this time I feel certain Going mad again again again Shan’t recover I can’t even write Water fill me flood me Water take me Dearest your life Your life without me, me Your life, your goodness I can’t, I can’t go on From me Your life, your life Without me Everything I am Has gone Water fill me flood me Water take me Dearest Can’t concentrate Can’t go on Mad again again again Feel certain Everything has gone Water fill me flood me Water take me  218  Breathe Reprise (text by Jennifer Butler) Breathe Silently now Be still silently Don’t move Listen Breathe still Breathe slowly Silently slowly With silent breath Be still slowly Slowly breathe Breathe still Breathe slowly Silently slowly Silently breathe Silently be  219  The Scarf (Text by Jennifer Butler) Thick red wool Twists around my index finger Scratching, pulling Needles clicking Marking time Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Turn over Every stitch identical Row after row Day in, day out Bending, scrubbing Washing, tucking My whole body aches Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Turn over For eighteen months And twenty days I have come to you In my loneliness each evening Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Turn over In the dim glow of the fireplace I admire every stitch, every line Red dye leeches into my Calloused fingertips But you are the only thing that’s mine All mine Always mine Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Turn over Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Knit knit purl knit purl knit purl purl Turn over  220  Lingering (Text by Jennifer Butler) with your hands you awaken me your hands so intimately lingering your scent lingering on my skin with your hands you awaken me awaken me again I feel your hands your hands so intimately on my skin lingering you awaken me with your hands on my skin your scent lingering with your hands you awaken me your hands so intimately awaken me again I feel your hands lingering on my skin  221  

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