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Off the Wall Issue #4 Carnegie Learning Centre (Vancouver, B.C.) Aug 31, 1993

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Off The Wall*: Writings from the Carnegie Adult Learning Centre * Off the wall: a phrase that means a little crazy, outrageous, something said or done out of context. Also, submissions are made to this· magazine by pinning them on a wall in Carnegie's Learning Centre. When it is time to publish a new issue, those submissions are taken "off the wall". Here's our fourth issue of Off The Wall. It's exciting for us to see how we learn new things from one issue to the next. The magazine, and our approach to putting it together, seems to improve each time. In this issue, for example, learners and tutors worked hard to do all the desktop publishing with only a small bit of staff support! It's becoming an Off The Wall tradition to use the same editing guidelines as before -- so throughout the magazine you might find unusual grammatical structure or "errors". We chose to leave these intact because we believe that this better reflects the authentic voices of the individual writers. We hope you enjoy this issue of Off The Wall as much as ever. The editorial committee The people who worked on the editing and production of Issue #4 were: Rick Heldt, Andrea Simmonds, Michelle Lebeau, Windy Havens, Bonnie Stevenson, Pauline Robinson, Dora Sand-ers, Noah Sakee, Marty Lucas, Rika Uto, Yuet-fong Lee, Albert Anthony, Steve Lentinello, Charlene Day, Heather Brisebois, Richard Calcutta, Michael McCormack, Jon Chung, Trevor ' Robinson, Patricia Leung, Huong Tran, Debbie Bryant, John Foster, Gord MaFceau, Elaine Poon, Kylie Hutchinson. (If we missed you, sorry! Let us know and we'll make up for it next time.) Off The Wall is published fourtimesayear .........,.........,.........,"""' ~=-~~~~~=-=~ by the Carnegie Adult Learning {? )t?)t?i"'/"'/ Centre. This issue consisted of 1000 copies. Please direct enquiries about subscriptions or contributions to Off The Wall, c/o Carnegie Adult , >< @ :i Learning Centre, 401 Main Street, Vancouver, BC, V6A 2T7. Phone: (604) 665-3013. Fax: (604) 684-8442. Funding and support for the publication of Off The Wall is generously pro- Some of the editorial committee vided by the Vancou-ver Foundation, the Vancouver School Board, the Carnegie Community Association, many donors internationally and everybody associated with the Learning Centre. · .. Contributors A. Richard Debney Bons Song lyric by: Sioux Bear Fred Henderson Noah Sakee Rick Heldt Noah Sakee Albert Anthony Marty Lucas Jung Bak Elaine Poon Juan ita Tsai-Yuan Hung Cyril E. Lewis Sharon Hager Contents Art ... from the Heart Autobiography . .. our own histories A Day in the Life .. . writings about every day experiences Education .. .learning at Carnegie , and other places Grammar Can Be Fun ... writings from an ESL class at Carnegie Homefires . . . stories from home Mother Nature's Prob-lems ... about everybody 's home Soapbox .. . opinions, opinions Streets .. . scenes from our neighbour-hood Terry Flamond P. Robinson Joan Doree, Volunteer Tutor Larry · Brian Livingstone Jan et, Noah, Steve, Wendy, Rickie, Brody and Rocky Steve L. Ismail Ismail Mikos Lambrop oulos, Instructor Grace Yip Yuet-fong Lee Ali Faraj Mandy Liu Margaret Wong May Tam L/ Peter Chung Kin Au Herb Kneekap Nikal Heather Brisebois Matt Thomson John Johnson The Big Swede Yoshikatsu Shimokado Charlene Day Marty Be Happy Vicky Dutcher Ronald A. Pinnell James Roadknight Jim Giroux May Wong Words/Nuisance Friends Lovers Family Strangers What Trust Desire Together Apart What Dream Fantasy Reality Fact What Destiny Fate Daydream Nightmare What Win Lose Future Memory What Control Manipulate Freedom Independence What Promise Commitment Cancelled Delayed What Share Experience Off the Wall Use Abuse What Love Trust Reality Life Answered (Dedicated to a dream/fantasy??) Richard Debney A. Richard Debney A Rose Coloured World Music was pounding In a small crowded bar A couple were fighting in the comer While a drunken waiter Spills his drinks On a dirty littered floor Spending my Daze In a drunken Haze Prom ising myself daily Off the Wall I won't come here anymore But it's so lonely When I'm all alone Tired of the beer and wine Always carried on her breathe She thumps her glass For another drink Throwing coins on the table I got up · to leave While I'm still able To find the door I'll not come here anymore No matter the pain Or alcoholic fantasies She' s gone . She didn't stay Dry lips, whispering prayers Return to me, Return to me. Back in the bar Never seen a sight like you . ... You are a magnet, I'm a piece of steel You be my wagon, I'll be a wheel Tanya -- Tanya Hear therollin' thunder, It's summertime Down-Under · What am I to do? Could I find you I wonder . Tanya -- Tanya -Words_ hardly spoken, cut my heart wide open I'll need a million nails, It's so badly broken Tanya A couple fight in the comer Pheromones ignite, and start a fire burning Fred Henderson Overload in my synaptic receptors Life Life is like a river It has it's twists and turns No matter what road you take Achieve your dreams · Never say '' I can't do it.'' Think positive Be truthful to yourself You are number 1 Al ways a winner ... Tanya Bons Neurons explode, with a hurricane fury Quicksilver runnin' through my v~ins like lightnin' I close my eyes . And squeeze with all my might, blinded by the light · In the glow I see you an' me, with eternity Oh, why can' t this be .. . ? I'm only mortal, A pri soner of time A soldier of love , in poetic rhyme Song lyric by: Sioux Bear Appointment Cancelled I sit and see Things I shouldn' t Awareness, feelings Fog, smoke The looking glass Even death Laughs , Rejects! Hell. ... Life!!! The Call A. Richard Debney It was Sunday I could tell Church bells ringing merrily Children with scrubbed faces Little girls with starched dresses Solemn faces pass me by Hurrying to enter, not first, not last Hushed warnings to little ears Little heads darting here and there Noah Sakee I huddle against the church wall Feeling the vibration from the songs But no heat escapes the wall Is there a difference my God or theirs The minister thunders, I hear his roar While the man at the door waves me away I'm just too dirty to pray My smell may offend We each have our stories No one listens to mine But I hum and I sing An old old song I must have heard somewhere Some Sunday morning long' ago Perhaps from a mother I never knew Or was it a dream from a bottle of wine I'm drawn here each Sunday Off the Wall 7 To listen desperately, intently For it may be a whisper It may be the call Fred Hellderson So what so what if you all bleed red so what if you all have feeling so what if you don't think about me . so what if you don't care about me so what's a friend I have to say I gotta be me and me is a friend Noah Sakee Weeping Eye Sore Rotten egg hatched a rat Stinking faster than epileptic eels in a rocketship with a stomachache orbiting the Glass-eye of the slumbering hypnotist down by the tracks on the undertaker's endless arm where the lovesick remains of a prehistoric train whistles pawn shop hieroglyphics throughout the doo-dad encrusted ceremonial CowskuU crowning the celestial brow of the High Priestess of the Lowdown decked out finer than a freshly prepared corpse From the gutter to the gallows The scorpion sings .. . Rotten egg hatched a rat Rotten egg hatched a rat Stinking faster than epileptic eels in a rocketship with a stomachache orbiting the Glass-eye of the slumbering hypnotist cradled in infantile parenthesis on the missile testing site under the sad hats of planets asst. cold cuts stapled to dusty leaves of plastic trees deeply rooted in aerial pathology the calm caress of psychic fingers Rick Heldt warm windblown whiskey kisses of the High Priestess of the Lowdown decked out finer than a freshly prepared corpse Off the Wall From the gutter to the gallows The scorpion sings ... Weeping eye sore Weeping eye sore Rick Heldt Off the Wall The People Within Me ' ' The people inside me are very different. They are all my best friend and my worst enemy. They laugh, they cry, they yell, they fight. One and only one stands out and that's me. One is a druggie, one is a thief, one is a comic. One you don't want to piss off, he comes out when I am dcwn and out One I think is cool is the kid in ME!! Noah Sakee 0 ne day as I was having a holiday I thought to have a trip in the woods. I have a nice little cabin among the green trees so the first night I went to bed early so I would not be tired the next day. I had my fishing rod and a gun in the cabin. But I went for a walk first in the forest to see what I could get for my supper. I got some berries to eat. There was one bad thing I've seen on my trip and it was a rabbit that someone shot I was so mad when I saw it. That I wish people would use their heads. They are nuts when they do things like that. And killing poor little birds and the bears and killing the fish off with garbage in ou~ water. It's a dam shame when they shoot the poor animals someone should kill them and see how they like that. But one day I went fishing and I got a nice big one for my supper. But before I left to go home I heard some shooting so I got my gun and went to see where it was coming from. Down the road a bit I saw two men with a gun and wheri I lifted my gun and took a shot at them and hit one of them. They didn't like me after that so they put down the guns and I took them off to jail. They got 40 years in prison and hard labour. So that was my story about the animals in the forest. f1:lbert Anthony Dancing On The Edge Of The World I am an alcoholic. My hands shake with tremors. My stomach quivered with dry heaves. I was dying for a drink. Almost three months this time. A.A. wasn't much help to me. All those people talking of drunks they'd been on and thedrinksthey'dhad. Always knocked mebackovertheedge. A drunk, a bum that's what people saw when they looked at me. Only a drink away from another drunk. 9 Off the Wall Walking in the cold rain trying to distance myself in the chill from another drink and the loneliness of being without my Rose . I ducked into the cathedral to sit in the last row. The peace and _quiet eased the pain, the urgency for another drink. If I sat quiet perhaps they wouldn't chase me back out into the cold and rain. Going through alcohol withdrawal gave me the tremors causing me to moan. While I shook and quivered my bones rattling inside my skin like hail on a tin roof. Fearing my bones would break I crossed my legs and wrapped my arms around my chest to quiet the rumble there. Praying for death or a drink of whisky or rot gut wine, the thought alone brought momentary peace to me. Candles burning in a friendly glow from the alter where a group of people gathered, I sat watching quietly, not wanting to be part of whatever they were doing. Until the organ began to play the wedding march. Everyone turned to face the back of the church where I sat slumped down in the pew. For a moment I thought they were all staring at me. Perhaps they'd heard me moan in pain or the rattling of my bones all the way down to the front of the church. Hearing footsteps off to my left I turned and there stood my Rose. I watched as she glanced at me. The surprise making her stumble. Then catching herself Rose continued down the aisle. Rose and I had shared a lot of wine when times were tough. And whiskey when we were flush. And we'd slept in the back seat of abandoned cars, when it was a choice between whiskey or a hotel room, or wine in the park on warm nights . Rose was vain about her long black hair, always brushing it until it shone. Sometimes she'd let me brush her hair. I loved her so. Brushing her hair made her feel young she said. Rose was a small, thin girl, and she always seemed to be able to come up with a bottle. Poor Rose just couldn't eat when we drank. Rose would become so sick she'd fall down cutting her hands and knees, and her face was covered in scabs from 10 falling so often. Rose was so weak when the ambulance came to take her away. She cried and begged me to take her away. I failed her. I was too drunk to carry her any further, and even though I fought to keep her, the police came and arrested me for being a nuisance and Rose was whisked away. Good intentions to get sober and look for Rose always seemed to end with me drunk and crying, "Rose. Rose." Mostly I was selfish, concerned with my life. My hunt for more drinks to quench the thirst, the fire within. Even on the wagon for the last three months,-the dream of whiskey and wine seem more important than my dream of finding Rose. Rose's green eyes and innocent smile, her gentle touch when she'd hold me in her arms when I was sick. To my shame I never asked what she had to do, to get me a bottle to ease the pain. She never spoke of the shame she endured to stay with me.Selfishness led me to believe when I got straight I could look for my beloved Rose. I sat stunned, watching my Rose walking proudly towards the alter, her back straight with her long black hair swaying with every step. With tears in my eyes I watched the people gathered at the alter move over to the grooms side of the church. It felt like a knife in my heart as Rose looked to the bride's side of the church and seeing it empty. Rose's head bowed and the priest and the groom rushed to her side to console her. I wasn't surprised to see her pointing at me, a drunk at her wedding wasn't a good way to start. . I rose to leave, to save Father Ril~y the embarrassment of having to ask me to leave. I started to walkaway, whenFatherRileycalledout · to me. "Excuse me. Excuse me." · I turned with tears still in my eyes and told him "I'm sorry Father, I never meant to interrupt anyone's wedding." "No, my son ," he said, "Perhaps you could help me. '' I said, ''How could I help?'' Father Riley remembered me now from the mission and asked me ''How long has it been, Jack?" And with a little pride creeping into my Off the Wall voice I said, ''almost three months now, Father.'' "Jack," he said. "The lady has no one to give her away. She thought, perhaps y~u'd care to offer her assistance.'' My clothes were all worn out work clothes, clean and pressed, and I looked down at them.: I know I smelled the wine. It sweated through my pores . I could smell it. I'm sure everyone else would, too. "Jack," the priest said. "You look fine," and he took my . arm, led me down the aisle towards the front of the church. My head was bowed to hide the tears that stung my eyes. Looking up I stared right into Rose's green eyes. They seemed to strip me naked, tearing away all the falsehood, leaving me humbled. My throat was so dry, I knew I could kill for a drink of whiskey. There was a lump in my throat and I could feel fresh tears on my cheeks. ''Rose ,'' I said. "Rose," and words seemed to fail me. Rose came and embraced me, kissing me on the cheek. "Hello, Jack," she said. "How did you know? We looked for you to invite you to , attend.'' It hurt me more than anyone will ever know, to tell Rose the truth. "I didn't know Rose. I just came in to escape the cold and the rain, and sit in the peace the chapel gives me. '' Rose took my hand and introduced me to the man she was about to marry. "This", she said, ''is David, I love him very much, Jack. He helped me and stood by me all the time I was in detox .'' Rose hugged meand said, " Jack, I hope you will give us your blessing , you're all my family now. " 11 was sober, .but I felt myself swaying, and I heard Father Riley say, "Jack's been sober almost three months, now, and he's doing it all on his own. '' And the priest said, ' 'We' re all proud of him." · David looked 'like a hard man, big and tough, but he softened whenever he looked at Rose. His hand was huge, holding mine. I told him,. '' Rose and I were family, and I hope you take real good care of her. Rose has suffered enough and she really deserves the best, and I wouldn't want any harm to come to her." 11 David put his big arm around my shoulder and told me, ''Don't worry, Jack. I love her very much," the big man said. "I hope you'll come around the house and visit us. '' I took Rose's hand and when Father Riley asked, "Who gives this woman?" I spoke with pride. ''I do. I do,'' then stepping over to_ the brides side of the church I sat in the very first row, sitting tall with pride with tear filled eyes. I always dreamed of the day when I'd be sober enough to go looking for Rose and when the bats and snakes were at their worst I never dreamt that I'd give Rose to some other man. Father Riley stood with his arm around me as we watched the happy couple leave the church. And said, " You've done well today, Jack. Very well indeed. ' ' But then he couldn't hear my bones rattling together as the voice in my head was screaming DRINK. DRINK. And I knew I was dancing on the edge of the world. Fred Henderson Das Me I am the man with the hand who writes the notes Ask around -Marty gets all of the votes As my hand glides across the paper putting it down I have the ability to laugh and joke like a clown I am swift with the hand like no one before On a scale one to the end I get a perfect score I can put it to you sweet or any way you want I can do it any time and better when I flaunt My hand should be insured it is worth so much It has such knowledge with a gentle touch I say it so good and make it meaningful to hear This is why all the ladies prefer to call me dear Tell me what it is I will put it in the book I speak so boldly because I am not shook Anyone who wishes to match my skills I will send them packing running for the hills So just remember my hand is quick as a gun And now you know Marty is number one I overcome all odds my second name is defy I am a living legend no one can deny Marty Lucas Off the Wall The Best Motorbiker I need a motorcycle and I want to have one since about , I was an immigrant for Canada I thought about it. So I wrote a written test one month ago (May 11) on Commercial Dr. at the motor vehicle branch. I wrote my class 6 test for motorbikes. It's a shame, but I have failed my written test seven times. I was estimated that I would fail approximately 3 times, but I was wrong. The questions are common sense but my English is too little to pass. However, in Seoul when I wrote my test I got a score of 90% when I was the last there the officer said '' are you lucky today?" I wasn't. I made a vague answer. Ifl pass my license. I will take care riding. I remember 4 years ago. In Seoul City. I two times experienced a traffic accident once was across from the police box (Cham-Sil. Olympic main stadium is nearby). Another time was in an intersection. I immedi-ately went to the hospital. The doctor said, you are hurt around your left knee bone. No problem. The x-ray picture showed me my hurt area. But back then I was a beginner. Now I am a good driver. I learned a good motorcycle riding technique. I remember, 5 years ago steep slope riding in Seoul Korea: near the building where I worked there was a very challenging 8 meter hill to climb. Fourteen motorcycle ri"ders took turns trying to rea¢h the top on a track about 2 1/2 meters wide. Only myself and one other rider made it. It was very exciting and very dangerous. I need to practice these things because, I haven't ridden for 3 years. I may need to practice out of the city. In Vancou-ver, I must drive cautiously because there are a lot of rniny days. Jung Bak The Comfortable Holiday How lucky those days, which seemed like holi-days, were for me. The beginning two years of my marriage contributed many cheerful days to me, such as being a mother and a student, and having adequate freedom. I would like to recol-lect these joyous days in the following para-graphs. 12 The beautiful holidays started, when I be-came a mother; this was the principal pleasure in my life. During pregnancy, I just ate whatever that I wanted and whenever I needed to, although my weight increased by over 50 lbs.; I looked as fat as a boar. For instance, five months before my older son, Lester was born, I just ate, went to KEC to learn English, and slept; therefore, there were many people who failed to remember who I was Elaine Poon because I had changed so much. After Lester became a member ofour family, day after day, he grew up very fast and was a big, fat boy, even though he was premature. For this reason, my husband and I had a great time playing with cute Lester. Other matters made me feel relaxed, these were the lack of stress from work and from the ruler of my own family, my mother. The fact is that not only did I not work but also my mother did Off the Wall not live with me, as in Hong Kong . For example, living with my mother I lacked freedom to do anything such as going out with friends, particu-larly with female friends, I was not allowed to get home at night after ten o ' clock; ifl did so, I would be in bit trouble. In addition, I could not · do whatever I wished. Before planning to do any-thing, I had to get an allowance from my mother. The fact is that I always told lies to her. Overall, the first two years of living in Canada, were the most wonderful holidays in my life to the present. Because I adore children, I became a mother; my first baby gave a lot of happiness to me. Moreover, not existing with my mother, I had a extremely comfortable holiday without control from her. For these reasons, I feel that it was my best long holiday . Elaine Poon My name is May Wong I was born in Hong Kong. It was in 1987 when I went to Montr eal. I lived there for 1 year. After I moved to Vancouver. I feel Vancouver is very beautiful and popular. I compare Vancouver to Montreal and find Vancouver is better. .The weather is better in Vancouver because Montreal is cold sometimes . So I like Vancouver and I will stay here my whole life. In Canada the people are very friendly, they have freedom. I have lived in Canada six years. I have travelled to Toronto, Ottawa and Quebec .City. I have become a Canadian citizen. In 1991, I became a Canadian citizen here in Vancouver. May Wong Off the Wall My Life On A Wednesday I live in a small but clean hotel room in the Downtown Eastside. I usually get up at 9: 30-10: 00 am to the sounds of the city traffic. The preacher on the corner of Hastings and Abbott St. is there almost every morning come rain or shine with her constant shouting about God and Jesus. I turn on the ghetto blaster to block out the noise that she emits. I find this does the trick. I'm not a morning person and find that having a coffee or cigarette doesn't clo a darn thing. I get dressed brush my teeth and collect my thoughts for the day. Upon locking my door I tum and make my descent down the four flights of stairs. Getting to work is quite simple for me. I only have to walk one and a half blocks. This involves passing through Pigeon Park at Hastings and Carrall Sts. A long haired youth murmurs '' skunk or hash' .' as I walk through the area. I nbd no or not acknowledge him at all. Sometimes when the mood strikes me I mutter back ''racoon'' to the pusher so he can hear the humour in his referral to animals. When I head down the backlane towards the Women's Centre there usually can be found a guy leaning into the wall having a leak, someone else picking through the dumpster or a drunk staggerihg by. I ring the doorbell to be let in the back door of the centre. Anne who is the cook ·lets me in. Today is laundry day for the volunteers as it's Wednesday. I stuff a load of clothes into the washer, then head over to get a cup of tea. A lot of the regulars are already sitting around the tables with a cup of coffee in front of them. Most of them have a cigarette lit up, as they recall incidents that leave an impression deep in their minds. Stories about abusive relationships, battles with welfare, or bad tricks dominate the conversations. The radio is pumping out love songs. The telephone screeches for .attention. One of the staff is using the photocopier. All of this and more is going on at once. A do-gooder middle class woman drops off some clothes to the receptionist at the front. The women jump up to assist the unloading of the car thus giving themselves a chance at first ownership of whatever may lay in the bag or box that is carried in. The leftover clothes that are not of interest are placed in the clothing room for future viewing. Anne has made some vegetable soup for lunch. I line up for some and sit on the couch at the front by reception, to enjoy it. A fight goes into full swing by the back tables. I get up to watch and ensure it doesn't become physical. Tension builds because of this. The staff step in and mediate. Everything resumes as if nothing happened. Before long an occasional laugh is heard at something s3:rcastic that one of the street women said. At one o'clock I walk the one and a half blocks towards Carnegie at Main and Hastings . Today is Wen-Li-Do class for two hours. I learn numerous punches and kicks that can give minimal or permanent damage to my attacker. The last half hour we divide into small groups having the opportunity to practise what we learned on the floor mats. that are folded and held up by my fellow classmates. This to me is the highlight of the instruction as it allows me to let my frustration out in a safe and harmless way. It also allows me to feel empowered knowing I can defend myself as a woman. I'm happy that I can take something like Wen-Li-Do because getting a course for free is getting scarcer and scarcer . At the end of the class I put my street clothes, attitude and face on. I leave the Carnegie Centre by the front doors. The games room on the main floor is full of tired 14 Off the Wall men playing chess. With their shoulders slumped they concentrate on their games. The front steps alway s are full of people hanging about. I weave my way down Hastings St. passing the junkies, pushers, drunks, panhandlers, and prostitutes . I turn down Columbia St. and return to the Women Centr e. Juanita at the Vancouver Public Library Read-ing of Off The Wall, May 1993 In the time I've left Wen-Li- Do I'v e had on a fighting face, then a street face which in turn beco mes a writing face when I reent er the Centr e . I sit down in a chair at the front table and prepare myself for the learning group. I joi ned up with the group in order to enhance my wri ting abilities . I' ve been in it since mid-Decem ber and I really enjoy the chance to write with tutors I respect. At five o'clock I clean up whatever I've been working on and put it away in my file until next class. 15 Some of the women are sitting on the couch at closing time. Susan is one of them . She lives in a small dumpy room close by . Her room smells of urine, contains no hot water , but has plenty of roaches and mice . Susan waits until closing so that she has less time to spend in society ' s prisons. Hotel rooms. It contains for entertainment a small cheap ghetto blaster and overhead is a bare light bulb which represents her sunshine. She lives on an income that's as tight as spandex and a heart filled with years of pain from sexual and physical abuse. I walk down Hastings St. towards Save On Meats to get my supper. I glance out the door and notice a cop has a gun pulled on a beggar. I thought the cop was robbing him. Why else would he pay attention to the man in rags held together with dirt? I head home with my purchase and tiredly climb the four flights of stairs. I stick my meat in a tin foil pan, pu t a bit of spice on it and place it in my toaster oven . I flick the T. V. on and relax with a smoke on my bed thinking about what tomorrow will be. Juanita I Do Not Understand? Why do you yell at me I am stand in front of you I still can hear I do not understand Why do you hit me I' bleed red like you bleed red Why do you steal from me I do not take without asking I see the pain in you don't you see it in me Yeah but why for you don' t understa nd ' Noah Sakee That Year Being a cool kid is absolutely important when you are in high school. Unlike in western countries, living in an old world as Taiwan, being a cool kid doesn' t mean driving a fancy car or having a bunch of boy or girl friends. It' s a fashion in a typical high school , to have your own guitar , doing lots of sports and belong ing to a group . Off the Wall These are the only things we could do after we e~caped from school. · In late 1988, I was one of those kids trying to be unique on campus. You know once you got a guitar near you, those fools would get around you, and try to make you play. In the meantime, you were not supposed to play so easily, you had got to pretend that you hated to play. Well, they can always wait. I was completelyin love with my guitar, no kidding. Actually, I should've said my bmther's guitar, but anyway, he never used it after he bought the guitar a few months later. I used to carry it with me. I loved to touch the shape , it had a damn good shape. Plus the loud but clear sound, gee, it was really neat. The funny thing is, I used to think I was pretty intelligent, because I learned guitar by myself. Come to think of it, I am surprised that my poor guitar skill could fool my friends for such a long time. I loved all kinds of sports, but some Chinese people just don't consider that girls should have sports, too. That's why I was so upset about going to a girls' high school. They didn't have any sport team. Therefore, I never really got a chance ,to learn tennis or soccer. I was pretty cool in basketball, though. You know, after an exciting game everybody ran up to you and hugged you. All your shirt and stuff were in a mess, but they just didn't care. That was a really nice feeling. However, there's one thing that I would never forgive myself - my height. I got so depressed when I finally realized in my late sixteens, that I wasn't gonna grow any taller . I admitted the cruel truth that I would be just like this, no ,matter how much I played basketball or swam for hundreds of meters. You know this was really a huge disap-pointment for me. This was terrible ! ! ! I mean, how could you bo so cool when you are so short? This was a disaster. In a small society as high school, friendship is everything. In order to be loyal to your friends, you ;ha,ve to go to classes, cafeteria and even washroom together. For us, it was very important to share 'happiness with your friends, especially in the washroom . We talked about lots of nice stuff there, and had fun. We were together all the time, even the ten minute short break between classes. In a ten minute break, we could hang around from the big tree to the end of the '' great wall'' which divided us from the boys . The secret was, there always have some good-looking guys. After school, we loved to sit on the grass and look at those old coconut trees. I enjoyed the sunshine, music and friend-ship: until one day. I realized that I wasn't so perfect at anything. Being cool doesn't mean I could control the universe. Suddenly I figured out there are more important things beyond my guitar and that stuff. What about the real world, my school and my life? It was just like when you were a small kid, and you wanted to be President Clinton or whatever, but after you grew older, you just want to be a bus driver or something. Once you woke up, things are not going to be the same as the way it was. However, I had those great times, and I will never forget. My magnificent, splendid, wonderful but foolish year of sixteen. Tsai-Yuan Hung On Wed the 10th of March 411 took us to lovely Snoqualmie falls Washington. Then we had a nice lunch at the Snoqualmie falls Inn and after lunch we walked around. And took some pictures of the lovely falls. Then we got on the bus and went to North Bend Washington to see another museum but it was closed until spring and summer so we could not see it. It was like the train Museum it was closed until spring and summer. We were mad they were closed because we wanted to go in _and see them. But anyways we all enjoyed it. Then we left for Vancouver about 3 in the afternoon Before we got to the border the driver took us to Mcdonald' s for a coffee break. Then we got back about 6 So that was my trip to lovely Snoqualmie falls. Albert Anthony Off the Wall Good-Bye I feel so depressed because I will be leaving downtown soon. When I move to New Westmin-ster, I will feel so empty for a while. To me it will be like saying goodbye to an old friend. I have done so much since I came to Vancouver. I remember when I was living in a hotel room and there are times I wish I was still living there. Life was so simple compared to now. I will always have that feeling in my heart for as long as I live. Another Cup of Coffee The sparrow lands . like a punch to the soul On the overgrown lawn Cyril E. Lewis of a mythical place called called home. The doors were locked so I burned it down The sparrow flew away but I'm still hanging around ... Another cup of coffee down my sleeve The snow falls whispering like sexy black lingerie My cigarette disappears like a ghost eating birthday cake. Everything reminds me of you the ceiling's full of nails You represent every one of them I bang a new one in every day . . . Another cup of coffee down my sleeve My fingers are trumpets spitting out your name The sidewalks are mirrors the sky is premanently stained All the blooze songs ever written are playing all at once It's raining knives on the graveyard in my guts ... Another cup of coffee down my sleeve Rick Heldt 17 A Warm Summer Day Today is warm with scattered clouds. It could be described as muggy-a popsicle day. The weather recently has been very changeable. The other night we had a wild light-ning storm that wiped out a radiator shop. Mornings are often cool and wet but it usually warms up in the afternoon. Today I am learning the computer but it is hot and stuffy here in the computer room. Days like today I enjoy my balcony at home. The balcony is sunny inthe mornings but cool and shaded in the hot after-noons. It is fun to watch the people goini by on the street. I have made some homemade popsicles that keep me from pigging out on ice cream -some low calorie ones. So I sit on my balcony on hot days in the shade, eating my popsicles and watching the people going by. These days I am doing a lot of swimming. I go regu-lariy ·with a friend. My swimming has improved . quite a bit with lots of practice. Summer is really a niGe time of the year. Sharon Hager Off the Wall Pick Up on Sensation Street Danger in every direction, the cards fall here Blinking view the photograph, I make it my business Pioneers of privilege, on the carnival trail Cracked shadows of the insect jungle, violate the masses Like a dog sniffing out the territory, blind and factual Breathe on pianp strings, lay out your father's old_ uniforms ' The general is fucking a tank, rainbows shoot from its guns The junkyard is one heaving, breathing mass, waiting for a reason Something dead and searching lurks here, some-thing following you A collection of rubber fingers, political ghost dream N"ymphmobile cruises down vaudeville, behind the neon stream A heartbeat in the sewer system, a feeling over our heads There's a gremlin in your panasonic, your suffer-ing has just begun There's got to be a way around these hieroglyph-ics Where did those transmissions come from Learn you lesson through fidelity, entrance me with prothesis Left b~hind the sound, pick up on sensation street Rick Heldt Blackout Poetry? Pottery Empty Empty the empty vase Into The empty ocean And donate my brain to silence Invite me to your party/I promise you won't have to throw me out/ After having drank too much/ After having insulted all of your guests/ After having pissed on your kitchen floor Blackout Rick Heldt · The Powwow Tre powwow on Saturday at Oppenheimer. So we had all to work hard so we can have the powwow on Saturday. There was many people there we all had good time there. · When I was catching the bus I looked up in the sky. There were two eagles in sky like they .were following me to powwow. When I got to powwow they were there. Then when I sang on the drum it was such a good feeling to be back on the drums. God loves you so do I. Terry Flamand 0 ne day 411 took us on a trip to Snoqualmie falls in the State of Washington. And on - the way we stopped at the U.S. Border and a guard came on and asked us are we from Canada we said yes so he said have a nice day. So after that we were on our way to Snoqualmie and we didn't stop for coffee break. The bus driver kept on going until we got there at 12 for lunch time at the Inn. But before lunch we went to the train museum but it was closed for the winter. But they had some old trains outside so I took some pictures of some old box cars and old steam engines out in the yard .. And they were sure old engines and someold passenger coaches so I took some old pictures. Then they had an old machine with a great big huge log on it gosh it was a big tree log it was a fir tree. Then after all ·that we got on the bus and went to the lovely Inn for a nice chicken dinner. Off the Wall When we were having dinner someone put a fire on in one of the lovely fire place. , Then we took a walk around and seen the falls what a nice falls to take pictures of. · Then we got back on the bus went to North Bend Washington to see another museum and it was closed for the winter and it was about farming we were disappointed. So we went to a seniors centre at North Bend and they had the same name like ours we were surprised to see that. And we went shopping at a mall then got on the bus to come home . . And before we got back to the border the bus driver took us to McDonald's for a coffee break. And that was my trip to Snoqualmie Falls Washington. Albert Anthony My Minds Eye I'm so bored today because I wish I was somewhere else. There are days my mind goes to a far off place. But today I can't find a place to go. Have I run out of places to go? To me it is like having writer's block. There is so much in this world that if I could just run away today I would never come back. Cyril E. Lewis My Trip to Van-couver Island My daughter and I left Vancouver at 6 P. M. Friday night, arriving in Duncan just before midnight. My friends, Roxanne and Marianne, met me at the Duncan Bus Depot. \\e enjoyed a quiet ride to the Indian Reserve near Port Alberni; this is where my friends lived. Saturday morning I awoke to a big surprize: My friends had pre-pared a picnic lunch. Roxanne, Marianne, myself and our children, hiked for an hour 'til we found the perfect place to enjoy our picnic lunch. We had a wonderful time, watching the children play -- they were covered in dirt by early evening when we made our ~ay back to the reserve. . We bathed the children and put them to bed; tomorrow would be another long day. Marianne looked after the kids, so that Roxanne and myself could enjoy the entire afternoon at the Sweat Lodge. After the spiritual cleansing, I felt alive again -- really good about myself. With the stress taken away, I felt ready to face the journey home. P. Robinson Cyril E. Lewis 19 Off the Wall ~ Q . ,, ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Off the Wall The Lost Teachers Due to the teachers going on strike which really affected me, as one person, a lot - because of their wanting money, it affected not only me, it affected a lot of students. I feel it was only the money, even though they said it wasn't. In my opinion this is very true. This is a free country and everyone can say what they want. They should be satisfied with what they get. A lot of countries don't get what we get in Canada. Look at the people on welfare, look at what we have to live on compared _ to the teachers salaries. Sure I know a lot of them have families, but I have 8 individuals to feed and some of the teachers have only 1 or 2 in their families. And they're still not satisfied with what they're getting. I'm satisfied and happy with what I'm getting. That's the Canadian government for you. They help outsiders, foreigners first before they help the ones who are born here, their own people. They help us last. Terry Flamond Lines From The Learning Centre: Senior Citizens Carnegie Learning Centre has room for everyone! One of our most remarkable groups is the Seniors Citizens ''English As a Second Language'' Class. This group is made up of eight Chinese - Canadian women whose ages are from 62 to 83 years. Some of them have been attending for 6 months while others have been coming for 1 1/2 years. Their names are: Nancy Wong Alice Ng Chat So Chan Jenny Lee · Hing Cook Chan Yuk Lin Choi Siu Yiu Ng Wai Chung Ho They are a feisty good-natured bunch, with a great sense of humour who frequently made their tutors and staff laugh. One learner came to Canada in 1957 but the others arrived between 1979 and 1991. They all came from Hong Kong to Canada with their families or came to join them here . Some of them take care of their grandchildren. One lives in the Chinese Seniors Home which she likes. They say they like coming to the Learning Centre which they heard about from relatives or friends who are already attending E.S.L. classes here. The women say they found Canada a big change from Hong Kong and that it took awhile to get used to their new country. They say Canada a Bit boring because 21 Off the Wall they can't speak the language . They are d~ter-mined to change this. One of the group has never been to school either, here or in China, but all the others went to Elementary School in China or Hong Kong . None could speak any English when they arrived in Canada . What do they expect to get out of the classes here at Carnegie? Well they especially want to learn us~ful phrases such as "Excuse me - I'm lost. Can you help me?" or "Where is the bathroom?'' They also want to learn to ride th_e buses and the Sky Train. One womari wants to be able to order a pizza! They laugh now about getting lost and making mistakes, but at the time they were scared. They say they need to learn English to live in the world and enjoy themselves. They like coming to class because they socialize here and in other places like the Eastside Seniors Centre where they love to play BINGO. Some of them like to go to our cafeteria for coffee too. They are a great group of women - full of fun and enthusiasm and it's a pleasure for the tutors and staff to work with them. Floyd Wong kindly acted as interpreter for the interview . Joan Doree, Volunteer Tutor Dear Tutor: At the time I met you, I was a little apprehensive about taking a tutor. I was thinking of a previous experience I had, one which fright-ened me so badly I cut off our session, and did not want to have anyone after that. So when a friend suggested you should tutor me, I was a little leery of you. We started talking about my problems, concerning verbs and nouns, and how important , it was for me, because of my writing class, my doubts about tutors were gone . I was glad you made this possible , because I was always at ease when you were talking . 22 Although you instructed for a brief period, it was very educational for me . I learnt a great deal in that time span . The way you taught, how you did it was so intense. I went to my English class so confident, I responded to my instructor ' s questions on verbs and nouns precisely ; and without hesitation. I never had the opportunity of learning -algebra or geometry in school.- When you started teaching me how to do them, my afternoon sessions passed by so quickly, I couldn't wait for the next meeting. My only regret is, I did not continue. I was sorry to hear you were not staying, but the time you spent tutoring me was extremely appreciated. It seems like all good instructors, and tutors that are so effective in teaching adults, never stay. I would like to thank you personally, and hope the. goals you assign yourself conclude in _ happiness and success. Sincerely, Larry My Day at Carnegie When I arrived back here in Van-couver, I didn't really know what to do right away. In the back of my mind I _ really wanted to go back to school. At the age of thirty-five, it's about time I did something to open some new doors. I only have a grade ten educa-tion, so I would like to write my G.E.D. 's, which is my goal. Only if I knew back in high school, what I know now I wouldn't have to do this work now, but I've learned alot by living different ways. Off the Wall Since coming to Carnegie Cen-tre, I find it easy, as the teachers are easy to understand, and willing to help. You just got to find a teacher to explain things simple. Since being here at Carnegie, I've learned alot, as I do alot cf reading and essays. My goal at the moment is to take a Child Care Program. The conclusion of this story, is when I get my degree I will feel better about myself, ''it's about time''. Brian Livingstone ( un me wau Environmental Issues Environment issues is a class we have at the Learning Centre, we learn about recycling, our air pollution, ozone layer, our polh1ted waters, our wild life. We are learning how we can have a clean environmental city once again. A few of us students wrote a couple of statements regarding our environment. what about the plants? without water you're dead .mate! Pollution!! our children are in danger in the future fish, trees, all nature's beautiful things I think humans should chill out on the environment ''People'' are the dirtiest animals on the face of this earth solar power sun energy why can't the government open their eyes to see what is happening jobs are more important aren't they? 50% of our medicines come from natures plants we are destroying this rapidly sadness animals are dying off General Foods owns the tropi-cal rainforests dispose of the garbage prop-erly the earth is a living breathing entity, I wish I could give it abig hug the children and the future natives slash and burn, slash burn slash burn watch out for acid rain water, water everywhere a nar a drop to drink the atmosphere whats happening with the change in weather conditions to the fish in the lak~s? Janet, Noah, Steve, Wendy, Rickie, Brody and Rocky Wendy Pedersen I t l ,,Off the Wall Mother Earth in Distress . Our environment is slowly dying Pollution is killing our animals, rivers and our air Mother earth can't hold up with all this pollution. We have to live through this day by day We have to save our planet Our children in the future are in danger Recycle, Recycle, every bit helps So let's all do our part It comes from your heart To save our "Mother Eart):I" Mother Earth Cry's . Rons Our lakes are no longer clean, the fish are dying down our streams. No longer can you canoe down a clean nver, that's because it's now all polluted water. if not the people of our nations should show him how. Mother Earth weeps with pain, feeling the drops of acid rain. Father sky now cries for what people have done to our lands Steve L. Noise Pollution (1) Noise Pollution effects our ~nvironment in ways it hurts us. The first way it hurts us is by the ears, and if we can't hear right our thinking is not right. The second way is everbody needs quiet time, so .we can do environmentally friendly things. Let's all stop the beatings overdosing, kill-ing yourself because all the sirens are the major cause of noise pollution in the Downtown Eastside. So if we see everyone as people not burn artists , asshole, etc . ... There would be less sirens. Our children of our future will breathe Noise Pollution (2) garbage air, all I can say it's not fair. Our wildlife is dying off to extinct, the trees are falling everyday of the week. When 'Yill people realize how much it has done, it will be too late for the children to I laugh or have fun~ We need to find ·a solution, to the mess we now have with our pollution. The government needs to act. right now, 25 Let's all stop the beatings, over dosing, killing yourself because all the sirens are the major cause of noise pollution in the Downtown Eastside. So if we stre everyone as people not burn artists, asshole, etc .... There would be less sirens. Noah Sakee I · As The World Turns-Welcome to our dying planet. We the people of our planet have no one else to blame, except each other for ending our wildlife, pollut-ing our waters, killing all ·our fish, damaging our oz.one layer and ending our rainforest. To me it all comes down to is the greed for money. It seems and is a-known fact-that people who have big bucks always get what they want. Nothing seems to stop them from de~troying our planet with all their factories that have and make dangerous chemicals Off the Wall that harm our planet and our own lives. Why is money more important to people than a human life, or our wildlife, or our ozone layer, or our rainforest or our waters, or our fish? Our planet is dying. faster than you can imagine. If everyone on this planet could: see how much damage has been done to our wildlife, fish, waters, ozone layer, rainforest maybe then they will understand how to help our dying world. , Our dying planet deserves to live not die. We are the ones who made it suffer by making it choke from pollution, by making it cry which makes acid rain, that is caused from nuclear chemicals. Our planet ~nd children deserve to have a clean healthy future. We need to understand what we have to do as a family, to make a clean environmental planet once again. To know what is right and not do it is as bad as doing wrong. Steve L. Air Pollution Air pollution comes from different sources. However, I would like to emphasize industrial air pollution. Industries are a necessary evil. With-out them no modernization would have taken place. On the other hand, industries pollute our environme nt. World population has increased to a SU!-ggering number and_ industries are catching up in order to supply them the most needed goods an~ se,rvices . _ Whenever l;l_ new industry is built, pur precious enviromnent pays the price. · •fodustries play a major role in polluting the dean air. : Eve ry day thousands of tons of gases and chemicals are .released into air. Although we ;:J.re heading toward the ·twenty-first century, ·our environment- in fact is not getting any better but becoming even worse. Due to the industrializa-tion, the future of our environment is bleak. · If the future of the environment is uncertain where would industrialization lead us to? Al-th(;)Ugh authorities concerned_ talk about ways to prevent environmental pollution, the environ-ment gets abused_urtceasingly every day. I think it ·is ·the time something tangible has to be done before things get out of hand. Otherwise, we shall pay the price in terms of health problems. In some places in the world, the air is more polluted. In third world countries the problem of air pollution is very evident. Industries are constructed at the ~ost of the environment. Health researchers agree that Cairo, the capital of Egypt, is so polluted that living in Cairo is like smoking 18 cigarettes every day. Smog covers the whole city so it is impossible to see anything more than half a mile . Not only is Cairo affected by the pollution but some other · cities are as well like Mexico City, Calcutta and others. Major industries behind air pollution are mainly power plants and heavy industries. Most of these industries use oil or coal as a source of energy. Air pollution caused by such industries can be slowed or even stopped to a certain extent if drastic measures are taken. Some industries, nowadays, use natural gas instead of oil because it is friendlier to the environment. However, not all industries have access to natural gas. Moreo-ver, it cannot be transported as easily as oil. Solar energy can be a good source of energy and it is completely harmless to the environment. The future of solar system is bright because techno-logically it is feasible. Although the solar system has been using the sun's energy for some time, its availability was limited mainly to households and light machines. However, itis unlikely in the near future that the solar system will replace totally oil or coal due to obstacles: first, financial problems. A huge amount of money is needed to undertake research and development to make possible solar energy to be used widely . Another obstacle to the development of solar power is oil producing companies which oppose the invention of new energy technologies. Ismail Ismail Off the Wall T he following submissions are from the intermediate ESL class, "Grammar Can Be Fun". This whole language approach to iearning grammar combines the skills of listening, speaking, reading and wntmg. Student participation in the actual editing of grammar mistakes is an important component of the process. These submissions are the end result of the process which means the students have written and re-written a total of four times to reach the publishing stage you see here. Mikos Lambropoulos, Instructor How-Ngoi Shot The Suns This is a fairy tale which comes from China. Long long ago, ten suns suddenly appeared in the sky. That made the world very hot. The hot weather made many people die. Forests burned and rivers didn't run because they were all dry. Plants and trees all died. The land could not produce any rice. People had nothing to eat. If this condition had continued then all people would have died. At that time, Yee was the King of China. He prayed for h~ven to solve this big problem. The Emperor of Jade who lived in heaven knew this problem. He sent a fairy who was named How-Ngoi to the world to solve it. How-Ngoi felt very uneasy because the t~n suns weretheEmperor'ssons. The EmperorofJade told his.sons to take turns appearing one sun in the sky per day, but his sons didn't listen to his words and they all appeared together in the sky everyday. They disobeyed their father. What could How-Ngoi do? He had to obey the Emperor of Jade's order to leave heaven for the world. He and his wif~ who was named Sheung-Agor came down to the world. He talked to the ten suns. At first, he asked them to appear in the sky one by one everday. If they didn't listen, he would take some action. The ten suns de-pended on their father ·· s power, but they didn't pay 27 Grace Yip Off the Wall attention to his advice. They moved close to the earth on purpose. That made the land catch on fire everywhere. This was their answer to How-Ngoi. How-Ngoi could not be patient anymore. He took his black bow and his white arrows to shoot the suns. He was a good archer who shot very accurately and had power. He shot the suns one by one until he had shot nine suns. Only one sun was left in the sky. People praised and thanked How-Ngoi for getting rid of the nine suns. No more fires burned in the world. The weather became normal. The Emperor of Jade was very angry be-cause How-Ngoi killed his suns. He refused to allow How:.Ngoi and his wife to return to heaven. How-Ngoi felt it was unfair to him, but then he saw a lot of monsters hurting people. He was willing to stay in the world. He used his bow and arrows and a sword to fight these animals. He killed six monsters: a giant snake which was several miles long , a wild pig that looked like a huge mountain, a bird that had nine heads and another bird whose wings were so wide, that the shadow covered the ground for several miles. He got rid of these animals and he wished the Emperor of Jade would forgive him and let him and his wife return to heaven, but the Emperor of Jade was still angry and refused them. He comforted his wife - he would think of some way to return to heaven. _ One day, he heard news of a fairy lady who had a potion. If you ate it, you would fly in the sky. He went to see the fairy lady to ask her to give him the potion. The fairy lady told him, "If someone eats it, he will fly in the sky, if two . people eat it, they would never die,'' but she only had one potion. She gave it to him. He . brought the potion home and told his wife they would eat it the next day. He was very tired and he went to sleep. Sheung-Agor was very happy. She waited for the next day. Her husband was not yet awake. It was the middle of August. That night the moon was very bright. Sheung-Agor was in the garden. She was thinking about herself, when she lived in heaven. Sl).e was very happy and she wanted to return to heaven, so she decided to eat the potion by herself. She stole it 28 and ate it. Her husband woke ~p and called her. Nobody answered him. He went to the garden and saw his wife flying Up to the sky. He knew his wife must have stolen the potion. He was upset after his wife left because he knew he could never return to heaven. He destroyed his bow and arrows and sword. One night he met a monster, but he had no weapons, so he was killed. Grace Yip Beginning to Learn English: My Experience I had learned some English in school when I lived in Hong Kong. It was unnecessary for my job because I used Chinese only, so I forgot most of the English words which I had learned. Yuet-Fong Lee Off the Wall When I arrived in Vancouver, i found out that I must learn English, because it is necessary. Sometimes when people spoke to me on the street, I didn't know what they were saying, so I just shut up and smiled. I knew ifl wanted to get along with other people I should know English. Because of this, I went to the Carnegie Learning Centre and began to study English again. Now I am studying English, but I have found there are some major problems for me. The . learning of vocabulary is difficult for me, because I only know some simple words. There are too many new words, so I have to look them up in my English-Chinese dictionary. My teacher told me, however, it was not so helpful to look up words with a bilingual dictionary. It is better to look them up with an English dictionary, so I try to work with one. It is good for me, but sometimes I still can't catch the meaning, so I get help from my bilingual dictionary too. Pronunciation is another problem for me. If I can't pronounce the word correctly, sometimes I do the new words phonetically in order to pronounce them. I realize that it is not a good way to pick them up, but I don't have another method. After a few months studying, I can separate a long word into small parts and try to pronounce it n·ow. I hope I can do it better someday. , The grammar of English is hard for me, but I think I can take notes and pay attention in class. After class, I have to review them at home, so I can remember some of them. The most severe problem is my own memory. I can't remember what I have learned. I always forget what I just learned, especially vocabulary. I know, at my age, it's hard to remember. I have tried to 'force myself to read the words every day, but I can only remember them for a period of time. After a certain time, I forget all of them. But I will never give up. In order to ·get by in this country, I must do my best to learn English. I think the best thing is to get the opportunity to talk with people in English. If I hear some words again and again or speak them over and over, I can remember them. So I think it's helpful for me to converse. On the other hand, I can read some articles even though I don't understand most 29 of them. I can learn some words from the articles. 1 think they are good for me to read. Yuet-Fong Lee The History Of Vancouver Before the European exploration, there had been ten native villages on the shores of Burrard Inlet and Point Grey. In 1291, Spanish navigator Jose Narvaes arrived at Point Grey. Although the Spanish did not play a large part in the history of this area, they left their mark on place names such as Alberni, Galiano, Cordova and Langara. In 1292, Capt. George Vancouver arrived and claimed the land for Britain, while searching for a north-west passage to the Orient. George Vancouver spent only one day on the site of the city which was named after him a hundred years later. After that, in 1808, Simon Fraser, the explorer and furtrader, Ali Faraj Off the Wall came by a river he thought was the Columbia, but it was the river which was later named after him. In 1806, the town of Granville which means "the grand city" in French, with a population of one thousand, became the city of Vancouver. On June 13th of that year, the entire city was wiped out in less than an hour by a clearing fire gone wild, and despite the chaos of rebuilding which the people of the city themselves had to pay for, the city council showed a remarkable foresight by turning the First Narrows Military Reserve into a park which was named Stanley Park after the Governor General Lord Stanley. In less than one hundred years, Vancouver had grown to be the third largest city in Canada after Toronto and Montreal, and it is now a metropolitan area. Its population includes many different ethnic groups which live peacefully together such as British, Chinese, German and Native People. Ali Faraj My Honeymoon Because of India's history, beautiful scen-ery and cheap prices, we chose India for our honeymoon, but when we told our friends we were planning to go there, all of them felt very surprised. They thought that India is not so · romantic and suitable for a honeymoon, but they have been proven wrong. Because of infectious diseases, we had taken immunizations before we. went to India. After a six-hour journey we arrived in New Delhi, the capital of India. We felt strange as soon as we landed there, because it was like jumping from our city into a new_world. People in Hong Kong are always very busy, but it is quite different in India. Indians seem to be just strolling around. They appear to have so much free time. The guide showed us around the sights of his Capital such as the Old Observation, the Parlia-ment and the Indian Gate. I have a strong image of the Observation. There is no modern equip-ment, but instead there are some old facilities which were used to predict the weather, calculate the time and the location of the stars. After a 30 couple of days, we went to some other-cities and looked around their temples, palaces and forts. The most famous one is the Taj Mahal which was built in marble and inlaid with many precious stones. Furthermore, it shouldn't be destroyed by earthquake due to its special foundation which would act like scissors. There are many interesting traditional cus-toms in India. For example, men don't like to use washroom facilities as much as women. Although men wear western fashions, women still wear traditional ones. According to their religions they should not kill cattle. They believe that cattle are holy animals, so we can find them everywhere. Also, they use English to communicate with other Indians, because there are many Indian languages and India was a British colony many years ago. On the other hand, there are many problems in India; the poverty of people and many people have to sleep on the street. No matter how hard they work, they can not easily maintain their living standard. There is inequality between men and women. Women don't have human rights in their society. Many times they are hit by their husbands. Islamism, Hinduism and Sikhism are their major religions. The conflict between religions is the main reason for civil strife. The dirty water is another problem: they don't have pure water to drink and distilled water is too ·expensive for them. They use the river to wash and bathe as well as to dispose of peoples' aslies once they have been cremated. However, India still has a strange fascina-tion all her own. So long as I have enough money, I will never fail to set out on another journey for there. Mandy Liu The Innocent Jennifer is a single woman. She is a Catholic who lived in Los Angeles where a lot of visible minorities live. She owned a grocery shop for twenty years which supported her and that was all she had. There was violence in the city last April, Off the Wall caused by a racial struggle between two policemen and a driver. The police were shocked by this affair after it caused riots in town. The contro-versy in the press pointed to the government even though their suppression of the violence was so cautious . Many people were injured and some shops were robbed. Jennifer was one of the injured-her skin was 90 % burned by the fire. Her shop was burned and she was sent to the hospital. She was in intolerable pain for burned skin and grieved for losing all her property. She was extremely angry with the gangs. The only way she could describe the May Tam terrible violence to the police was in her tearful, weak voice. She recognized two of the gangsters who were from her own native country and she got greatly depressed by it which increased her physi-cal agony. At the same time, she requested to have a priest for her last rites, because the doctor stated she was in really bad condition. Therefore, she wanted to have some peace of mind with her last confession. There was a secretary from the church who was a volunteer and listened to Jennifer's words carefully. She wrote down her last will with .much sympathy. At last, God led her away home. Margaret Wong Rika Rika is a Japanese lady. When: she was six years old she left Japan with her parents and went to Australia, because her father worked for a Japanese company which had many branches in other countries. Some-times he n.eeded to transfer to a branch company in Australia and America. They · lived in Australia only a few years, and then moved to Los Angeles California. She grew up there graduated from high school and completed university with a master's degree. Her favourite subject is Geography. Every two years she went back to Japan to visit her grand parents. She stayed in California for twenty years. She came to Canada in 1991 and she likes Vancouver, she found a job at the Carnegie Learning Centre. She manages the program and teaches the drop-in stu-dents. She is very clever. Ih only eight months she learned sign language from a deaf friend who also works at the Carnegie Centre. Her hobbies are hiking, pottery and acting. She is always shopping in junk shops. She is a good cook, but she always eats at the canteen. She is a vegetarian. She is very kind and friendly to the students. May Tam Off the Wall Country . Living There was a time in my life when I was into hobby farming. It was a very enjoyable time. The hobby farm was situated on an acre of beautiful flat land with a few trees such as, a cheery tree, Kumquat tree a plum tree, and a chestnut tree, a pear tree, and a holly bush. . I also had a few animals such as dog, two cows, two pigs, thirty chickens, four rabbits, five white peking ducks and three cats, and lets not forget Shep, a beautiful black lab pup who was six months old, but unfortunately, he died. The first time I µntied him from his leash, he ran across the road, and got hit by a car. I ran over as fast as I could, I checked his vital signs which were good, he was breathing, and there were no broken bones or blood anywhere, so I picked him up and set him down softly on a blanket in the back of the pick-up truck, and I took him to the veterinarian. The vet said he didn't look too bad, and said to phone back in a few hours, so when I phoned back in 5 hrs. he said he will give him ax-ray, and let me know in the morning how he was. When I phoned in the morning I had some sad news, he had died, what happened was he had a hole in his lung the size of a pinhole, he was a fighter to the end. So enough of the sad stuff and lets get on to a more pleasant part of the story. The house that was located on the hobby farm was about 80 years old and it had lots of character. It was painted white and looked like your typical farmhouse from the early 30's. The old woman who owned it before me told me she lived there for 50 years, and raised a thousand chickens for eggs. During those years, she never locked her doors, she said there was no need, she never heard of any crime or breakins in the area. Getting back to the barn animals, one of the barn cats had only three legs. I had to get one leg amputated, because of a infection which it picked up when it came home dragging a beaver trap on its right rear leg. Anyhow it survived quite well hopping around on three legs. The cat had a pinky beige coat of fur, I have never seen a cat that color before. He is still on the farm, or lives next door on the neighbours farm. There was a female cat there and the farmer there used to give him fresh cows milk. ' His name is Tinker. Talking of barn animals, I had 3 chickens that laid pink eggs blue and green. They were a special breed, imported from South America called Arconas. The rabbits were pets only, they were too cute to kill for meat. The ducks were not used for eating, but were used for their eggs, which were excellent for cooking. One time when I went out to feed the animals, I found one of the ducks missing, so I went into the field and looked around and finally found it, it was half eaten, you could still see the egg inside, which it was ready to lay, I think maybe a weasel or marten got it. It was the horse standing by the kumquat tree eating the grass, it happened to wander in from the road it must have got out from a broken fence down the _32 Off the Wall road. I put a tether on him and tied him to the tree. I was amazed at how he chewed the g'rass. It was like a lawnmower went over the area where he had eaten, it was like a putting green. skimming along the sky looking for insects to take to its babies. Peter Finally the owner of the horse who lived a few blocks down drove by and seeing his horse A Fearful sound drove in to claim it. The hot summer day was busy with the sounds and smells of animals, and birds, for e.g. I had a humming bird feeder attached to the side of the house and it took some syrup that I left for it. The cats were used to keep the rats away from the barn one time, I remember when I went out to feed the animals, I found a dead rat on the barn floor with its head eaten off by one of the cats. I also had a large garden and grew a variety of vegetables especially zucchini which grew plentiful. I remember once feeding the cows left over zucchini and next year it was growing all over the pasture. The seeds were deposited on the ground by the cow dung . The summer months on the farm were quite fun and delightful. The animals were mostly outside in the day, sampling leftovers, I threw them from the garden. Now lets talk about beef or cows. The cow is a fully grown female of any bovine animal, especially of domestic cattle. The cow is a very stupid animal, all she likes to do is eat. When I got the cows they were bulls so I had to castrate , which is removing the testicles, by way of using a tool similar to that of a crimper. I was about 14 inches long and it fits around There is a gas furnace in my house . It works to warm up the house. I know that are many gas heating parts inside the furnace, such as the pulley belt, fan motor, transformer, gas burner, etc. Last April, the furnace made a noisy sound, I was afraid it of trouble. I called P. A. Metal Co. to repair it. The worker of that Co. found that, the pulley wheel belt loosened, causing the noise. I spent 75 dollars to buy a new belt and for the service charges. Last November, the weather was coldei;-: I raised the temperature of the thermostat, and the sound of the motor made a loud noise again. The next day, I phoned to contact this Co. Their worker came to repair it and gave me a bill. It was $40. The fee included the service call and he tightened the pulley and checked the furnace operation. I. was very angry, but at last I reluctantly paid $25. Chung Kin Au Medicine Wheel: Pathways To , Healing the cord of the testicles and when you pressed it The medicine wheel approach to recovery is together it would crush the cord, and that would a way that can help Adult Children of Alcoholics, stop the sperm from travelling down. co-dependents and chemically dependent persons Now we can go on chickens . Chickens are alike. Individuals who have grown up in a family very dirty animals, they have lice, and eat their marked by dysfunction also can derive benefit own droppings, and they will eat each other if they 1 from walking the steps of the Recovery Medicine have the opportunity. Wheel. It is a good idea to put oil on their roosts to ' The recovery medicine wheel takes a bal-keep down the lice. I re~ember once ,going out to anced approach to · the task of recovery from the barn to feed the animals, and all of a sudden addiction and addictive ways of living that will a bat came soaring by about 2 inches from my appeal to people of unlike of kind cultural _ back-head, then in a quick dash he went back into the grounds and spiritual traditions. attic of the house probably what he doing was Within the medicine wheel recovery way, Off the Wall four basi~ realms of human existence are ad-dressed: 1: The physical realm 2: The realm of knowledge and enlighten-ment. 3: The spiritual realm 4: The realm of examination of one's thoughts and feelings. If I start walking the medicine wheel in the north (physical) I will find aspects of the other three directions included therein. This structure gives each section of the wheel a completeness within itself, as well as a connection to the other Kneekap realms of human existence, the other points on the wheel. As I walk the steps of the medicine wheel, I often will stop at different points along the way. Perhaps the words will stick in my mind or I may actually see myself in the wheel. 34 The wheel will act as a mirror for me. At times I will see something that reaffirms me. At other times I may see something in the recovery medicine wheel that will inspire me to make a personal life change. Whatever happens, the intent of the recov-ery medicine wheel will be the same. It is designed to help me grow healthy mentally, spiritually and physically. It is intended to help me become more fully human, at greater harmony with myself and achieve inner peace. If used properly, the recovery medicine wheel can help me recover from my dysfunctional past and/ or addiction and point me in the direction of greater harmony with my world. I will grow to understand new ways of thinking and new approaches to living. The means by which I can make positive recovery real for myself will be presented. The recovery medicine wheel is a path that can lead each and every one of us to greater selfunder-standing, a path that has the potential of helping us see the truth of addiction. When I know myself and I can see addiction or any dysfunctional way of living for what it is, the life changes I need fo make will become clear. My desire for healthier, happier living will provide my inspiration. The steps of the recovery medicine wheel will become my tools with which lasting change can be fashioned. Come along with me. Let's recover to-gether. To all my relations. Herb Kneekap Nikal My Trip I read the newspaper and knew that the Canada Swan International Travel China Tour will arrange one group to fly to China to celebrate their fifth anniversary . I decided to join the group, but my daugh-ter, Anna, who was afraid of any unexpected things happening to me , so she made up her mind to accompany me, and paid all my expensive. Off the Wall On Oct.30th, we departed from Vancouver to Beijing by Air China Flight 757. We had an English and Mandarin speaking tour guide with a car driver. In itinerary they took care of our group very carefully. Beijing is the capital of China. There are about 11,000,000 people. The weather in Beijing is the same as in Vancouver, but a little drier. Bicycles are the main tools for the city ' s transportation . According to the government's calculation Beijing had 6,000,000 bicycles been used every-day. We stayed in the New Otani Chang Fu Gong Hotel, which is a famous nice hotel, not only for the treatment, but also for the food. The breakfast was very rich! The buffet included Japanese, Chinese, and American style of food every morn-ing. / ~ / ~./ We visited the Forbidden City, Tinannmen Square, the Temple of Heaven , the Great Wall, the King 's Tombs, the Summer Palace, the Yuan Ming Yuan Ruins, the Y ongha Lama Palace, etc. After we got back to Beijing from Tianjin, we flew to Xian. Xian is one of the famous ancient capitals of China. The first Emperor of China developed there in the 11th Centu ry B.C. Ther e are large numbers of historical relics, a magnific ent museum of the Terra -Cotta Warri-ors and Hor~es of Qin Shihuan g (the Emperor) etc . The last three day trip , we flew to Shanghai. It is a great commercial city, which also has the well known private Yu Yuan Garden, The Jade Buddha Temple , the Longhua Pagoda, Nanjing Lu walking way . . . all histori cal sites. The city has about 13,000 ,000 people and everywhe re it is too crowded. We stayed in the Sheraton Hotel (a five diamond hotel). During this time, our 35 com-panion had a very good fel-lowsh ips and enjoyed our trips . We will have a reunion party in December, during Christm as time. Chung Kin Au Voice As a little boy being Metis I had no voice because I was in two worlds white and Metis worlds I was lost I did not know where to belong. Heather Brisebois (story next page) I did not know which god to believe in so I went with Indi-35 Off the Wall people because the opinion of their own religion is not always correct. · · There is good but tragic example about the mystical way in Japan. Before the end of the Second World War, a military government con-trolled all of the Japanese people by the· mystical way. At that time the government said that the Empero r- was like a · god from Shintoism. Shintoism, which is based · on a legend, is the natural indig enous religion of Japan. · So everyone had to obey what the Emperor said. In this way, · the Japanese people went to war, and the war was stopped by the Emperor. . You must still remember that last April there was a horrible and tragic case in central Texas in the U .S.A. It is that David Koresh and· his religious sect in the Waco compound were battered by armored vehicles of the FBI. This case also is one of the typical examples because he was a cult lea<;ier among his religious people. So he used the mystical way to take control of the people. Yoshikatsu Shimokado The Photography Review The photograph that caught my eye was four children in the back of an old pick-up truck. The .picture looks like a classical scene. It has an old 63 G.M.C. pick-up truck it's colour is a smokey grey, and inside the back is wood trimming with a chain across the back to . keep particles in . The four children are sitting in the back .. · I was admiring the picture when Michelle came up to me and told me the little story with it. She said that the children wanted to go for a ride with their grandfather. One of the children, a blonde little gi_rl had a kitten behind her back an·d they were all fighting over it so, they got in trouble and that's why they look kind of sad. She .also told me that the chi_ldren were her nieces and nephews. 38 I liked the picture because it makes you wonder what they were thinking. They look so cute and they look like close friends. .. Charlene Day I alw4ys like pictures of children because, I always 'take pictures of rhy son and he has a nice smile and pose. I never had babypictures of me so, when my son ' grows up and wants to know about his childhood, I can show him pictures and explain it to him. · When I go to a friends house they like to show me pictures of their family or of themselves. Pictures show me the person's emotional feelings or attitude at the t1me the picture was taken, · for e~al}'lple; if it is a happy scene in the picture they mµst feel happy. In Michelle's picture you can see she real! y cares and loves her nieces and nephews. She really took pride in taking the picture. . Off the Wall She takes pictures of them all the time and brings them to The Learning Centre people, and you can see she's proud of them. You can learn a lot from pictures, the beauty of them or the knowledge of them. (Photo on next page.) Charlene Day Burtin' World It is time to take a stand to save this wonderful place From destruction happening at an incredible pace The killing of the animals the raping of the land Is the stroke of Death From mans own hand When will man see he's killing the future for all And it won't be long now if we don't get on thb ball Who can understand the reason is so cold But man don't seem to mind he is utterly gold Everything has changed life is not like life before It used to be so beautiful for all to adore Now the,air, food, and water in which we all need Is not really decent for any of us to feed But we must go on living until its time we all must go To a strange land that none of us will know. Marty Lucas Permit me to introduce myself. I am a middle-aged, gay man. Presently, I'm living with two friends. Both have AIDS . . (I've tested negative myself and plan to stay that way!) Since meeting these people, I took an inter-est in both helping them in any small way I can and in learning more about HIV infection (AIDS). I would like to take a few seconds to dispel a couple of myths about AIDS. First and foremost, I want people to KNOW that one can NOT "catch" AIDS from touching, hugging or kissing a person... Nor can it be 'caught' by being spit on, sneezed or coughed on! After some study, I've learned that the only ways of contracting this dreadful epidemic . is through blood contact and/or sex - NO other way . has ever been found by scientists to date! 39 Out of 100,000 deaths from HIV infection in the U.S., 10,000 were diagnosed unknown but sex and/or blood contact has been considered highly probable in all cases. How AIDS got started is still a mystery. Some say it came from monkeys. Others say it started because of man-made chemicals gone , awry. Others, still, say it's "the Will of God". ... That claim is the second myth I would like to discuss now. It is also, in my opinion, as far from the truth as one can get! For one thing, most people with AIDS are more spiritual than most. .. In the book ''They Conquered AIDS'', there are 13 biographies of people who fully conquered AIDS (since the book was written, I believe one has since died). All said clean, healthy living, sometimes proper medication (if necessary) and belief in some power beyond our understanding. Some said belief in a 'God'. Others, belief in themselves ... All used some form of prayer, meditation or ''quiet times to think''. These, I believe, are their ideas on speaking to a 'god' ... It's also proven to me that AIDS can be beat and the belief in oneself (a "spiritual power"??) is very important in absolute recovery. I call myself 'agnostic' because I don't know for sure if there is a 'God' as people picture Him (Her/It). However, because my friends believe, I, too, question as to whether that power ("aura", "energy", etc.) exists and that maybe, - just ·maybe - prayer in any form is a big part of healing. I may be writing you again. Be Happy Racism Racism is a sickness . It seems to dwell in everyone No matter what creed you are Human beings are strange creatures _ They are so unpredictable Michelle Lebeau Off the Wall We were all put on this earth for a purpose. We should try to make the best of it. Life will go along smoother, if we try to love one another Instead of killing each other Togetherness Bons Everybody is special but we all need love, · Sometimes we are weak and need a shove, Friends are the ones who will do this for you, Because they care and they know you do. And to haye friends we must be loving and caring, Be willing to open ' our hearts and do a little sharing. If we are to survive and go on living, We must not be selfish but loving and giving. You will be repaid down .the road, 'Life will be easier and lighten the load. Marty Lucas Racism Canada is a country, made up of many peoples and cultures. That is what makes this country a great place to live. But ., what bothers me the most is that some people are grouped together by the colour of their skin or the religious or sexual beliefs. I try to judge people on who they are and not by the colour of their skin, et~. I came to learn this through a personal experience. I w.as at Stanley Park with some of my friends, when some East Indian men made some rude sexual comments to us. I was very angry and made a comment to t he effect of "Shut up you stupid Punjabs" . It was only after a great deal of self analysis did I realize that it wasn ' t the fact that they were East Indian, but it was the comments that bothered me and from that day forward I tried not to judge people by the colour of their skin, religious beliefs or sexual preferences, but by how they treat me and the people around me. I hope by sharing my experience with all the readers, that they sit back and take a look at theirselves and try to accept just one person for who they are and not by where they may have been born, what religion they believe in or who they choose to sleep with and if we do then maybe the wars would stop and people would get along much · better. Vicky Dutcher A Question? Will this recession get better, . worse or will it ease? I watch the money clock ticking away, So common sense till me no it won't "Yet" Why? Our Government deficit is rising to quickly. Who is going to pay We the people of course Is there an answer to any of this Should not we the people take.a close r look at what is going on Example- If '' Mrs,-Miss'' Allen was doing such a fine job for ICBC Then why was she replaced by someone else at an increase of Fifty Thousand-"50,000" a year Who is going to pay the increase Silly - The people of course r· If we had all these geniuses-financial analysts; and financiers around Then why are we so far in the red I ask myself a question The government can spend millions of dollars for a Constitutional Referendum and whatever pleases their fancy at the time Then why can they not put all these great minds together · and try to solve this problem Regardless of their politics-race-colour or creed They can not stop the clock, but in my own small mind I can see them slowing it down. Or Are we just another LLoyds of London The writing is on the wall Let's do something about it now. Off the Wall Ronald A. Pinnell Cash and Carry It's too bad the politicians of the greatest country in ~e world will n~t listen to the common folk. As far as I see it ev~ry damn one of them at the three levels of government live the life of the rich and famous. They are always looking for . bigger and better ways to defeat the deficit, when the answer is right on the tip of their nose. If every blessed one of them would throw $500 a month into the city it would help Canada to get out of . debt. After all this is only pocket change for them and damn sure they would not miss it. If our great leaders . would do this then would say look what we have done for you. More B.S. If b.s. could be put~ music, there could be 10 brass bands on the com-mons in Ottawa. James Roadknight 42 Off the Wall The Stabbing I was working here until roughly 10:00. This was about 3 years ago in the summer. I was stabbed by 3 people 27 times in Victoria Square. That's when I lost my kidney. When you got a 10 inch knife sticking in you, you don't look at the girl's face. The one guy I remember. He comes here quite often. I crawled on my hands and knees home. People walked by me, figuring I was just a drunk. The girl in the Niagara came out and tried to lift me up, and the detectives came. I was in intensive care for 3 weeks. They gave me up for dead. My chances were very, very grim. The only one who came to visit me from here was Robert Anderson. I never got a flower from here, and I had volunteered here since 1980. That was my second stabbing. The first was by my legal wife, believe it or not. That was even worse. The manager of the building came in and found me in a pool of blood. I didn't press any charges. There were five cops there, ambulance, fire dept. They were all there. Street Heat Learning life on the street meant a lot to me It taught me how to survive while being free The street are tough, and so must you be to last I was smooth and tactful with a lot of class I took good care of my body and kept well dressed But partied too much while being put to the test No one pushed me around because I was very well-liked Knowledge was my key I was great on the mike Money was always in my pocket that was a must One has -to take care of his self cause there is no one to trust I always kept learning to stay on top of my game Always knowing deep inside that l ·could never reach fame I always knew one day that it would come to an end I just didn't know who the good lord would send. Pick Up on Sensation Street Danger in every direction , the cards fall here Blinking view the photograph, I make it my business Pioneers of privilege, on the carnival trail Cracked shadows of the insect jungle, violate the masses Like a dog sniffing out the territory, blind and factual Breath on piano strings, lay out your father's old uniforms The general is fucking a tank, rainbows shoot from its guns Jim Giroux Marty Lucas The junkyard is one heaving, breathing mass, waiting for a reason 43 Off the Wall Something dead and searching lurks here, some-thing following you A collection of rubber fingers, political ghost dream Nymphmobile cruises down vaudeville, behind the neon stream A heartbeat in the sewer system, a feeling over our heads There's a gremlin in your panasonic, your suffer-ing has just begun !he~e's got to be a way around these hieroglyph-ics Where did-these transmissions come from Learn you lesson through fidelity, entrance me with prothesis Left behind the sound, pick up on sensation street Left behind the sound, pick up on sensation street Rick Heldt The Fix Methadone, is a substitute for Heroin. It is legally given to addicts on the program, to help them stay off of Heroin and other drugs. It is given out by prescription by a doctor, to be filled at a drug store. A few years ago it was run differently, it was given out by the government at a clinic. You went every morning to drink it in front of them. I believe that was the best way of doing it, as now you have a lot of people complaining about addicts lining up at drug stores early in the morning, giving the neighbourhood a bad name, mostly the ''Downtown EasrSide''. The Metha,-done program has been going for sixteen years, they the government have tried different ways to dispense it or to control it. Methadone is mixed with orange juice, which I found was stronger than the Heroin on the street, this was about six years ago. To get on the Methadone program today, I don't know how it works, but I do know six years ago how it worked. You would go to Detox give a urine test if tr~ces of Heroin were found, then 44 two days later you were given 80 mg. of Metha-done to drink it was mixed with orange juice, three days later you would go home. When at home yoµ had to go to a clinic off of West Broadway to drink your juice every morning (for me.) Some people who were . on the program for a long time would get their week supply (560 mg.) Like any other drug you build up a tolerance, the more you take the more you need. For example you could take your juice at 8:00a.m. and by 6:00pm you would get sick and need more. So what I would do like most addicts, I would use something else just to get through the night. When the clinic gave you a urine test it was easy to beat because they never watched you, you know what I mean. When I was using needles here in Vancou-ver there was no such thing as a needle exchange. I wish there had been cause you had to share needles and that can get dangerous but when getting high you don't think about anything, only the high. I was ".ery lucky because there are a lot of diseases around; thank God that I only caught Hepatitis from using. I met a girl when I was living in Montreal, she knew nothing about drugs or adoiction. She watched me use needles and pills for a few years, she learned about addiction and stuck by me till this day, I have to say that I thank God that I met this person called Carole that stayed by my side, that was five years ago, we are still Lovers and best friends today. I just arrived back in Vancouver two months ago after being away for six years. I'm going to school I want to get my grade twelve so it will open a few doors and do something with my life if I don't do it now I never will. Living here in the ''Downtown East Side'', while being straight is very hard for me, I get scared everyday, I can't afford to move anywhere else right now because I don't get enough money from the government, its like they want to control me, and there's nothing I can do about it, that's why school is important to me. I go to my A.A. and N.A. meetings three times a week and I try and talk to people who are straight and in the program also. I would just like to say this. When using you don't care about yourself so you can't care Off the Wall , about other people. It leads to lying, stealing , cheating, hurting and if you don't get help you will end up dead or in jail. Brian Livingstone Wind Chimes It's almost morning I haven't slept all night again Her side of the bed's Empty as my heart Dawn's almost here While I'll be gone We shared everything Once upon a time Now whatever we shared Is all gone somewhere else I smell her scent On her pillows Someone ~lse is smelling now They all warned me Like a golden treasure You have to guard at night Find ·a girl who '11 stay The wind chimes On the front porch Don't sing me to sleep anymore They.just chime out Empty notes, hollow sounds Neighbours walking by Look and see an empty house Though I'm still inside Love's gone, somewhere else · Love ,doesn't live here anymore Fred Hende-rson 45 Blackout Poetry? Pottery Empty Empty the empty vase Into The empty ocean And donate my brain to silence Invite me to your party/I promise you won't have to throw me out/ After having drank too much/ After having insulted all of your guests/ After having pissed on your kitchen floor Blackout · Rick Heldt 1• 1, This is a list of)earners at Carnegie who have successfully completed the GED and are either working or in college courses. Gloria Joe Dawn Skeith Valerie Bachman River Young Brenda Phillips Bill Berthin Walter Chownyk Jean Paul Lance Glen Culleton Sue Button Marty Lucas Lee Martin If we missed anyone who has finished their GED from June 1990 up till now, please let us know how you are doing. And congratulations to you all!! LET·s HEAR IT FOR ALL THE TUTORS Hl·P HIP HURRAY The UBC Library and UBC Learning Exchange would like to thank the following participant for her contributions to digitizing this community-generated document: Adrienne Macallum This community-generated work was digitized and deposited to cIRcle, UBC's open access digital repository, as part of the Digitizing Community Memories project of the Making Research Accessible in the Downtown Eastside initiative (MRAi). In collaboration with the UBC Learning Exchange and UBC Library, the project provided training and support for community members in the Downtown Eastside to digitize and make openly available community-generated materials.  This project aimed to increase access to historic Carnegie Centre publications and preserve these unique materials for years to come.  For more information on this project and the UBC Learning Exchange, please visit learningexchange.ubc.ca  October 26, 2017 


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